Episode 4 – Bullrush Nights

Gather round friends, let me tell you a tale of three heroes noble and bold A brute, a druid, and a thief who is but nine years old You know them by name, you know them by deed, their quests are famously daring So here I sit, singing to you an adventure that is worth sharing Tuck is the brute, he knows not his home, he loves to sing and fight Vinga's half-elf, he shifts his shape and wields a spear with great might Billy's a thief, his tiny size does mask the Larch's heart Best and brightest they may not be, but their friendship outweighs their smarts So gather round friends and listen close For the tale's about to start Last time on Spout Lore So Ving has been poisoned.

Now that you're out of the swamp, you're still dealing with a poisoned druid. Well, let's make it a priority to find like a healer. And you see a cluster of buildings. They call it Bullrush Village. My name is Aliki and we'll get you all set up. I point at Ving. I'm like, he's been poisoned. Is there a doctor or a healer around? This is Houdir and she is sort of the herbalist of the town. She takes some cloth that she had and she ties it around your waist, holding the poultice against your butt.

She says, no, no, no, no vigorous activity for the rest of the day. And rest, get some good sleep, get some good sleep. Wicker, stay close to her. I want to know where she lives. Wicker seems really offended that you would even ask. And she runs out of the hall. She just, she's left. Billy runs after her. Okay. By the time you get out there, she's not in sight. And then he like falls down to his knees and he's like, Wicker!

And a teenage boy with like a stick over his shoulder with fish hanging off of it stops and looks at you like, are you okay? I don't say anything because I'm just crying so much. He stares at you for a couple seconds, sees that you're weeping and then looks around and walks away. So Aliki sits down and she's eating a bowl of stew. And she says, so what was this you were doing in the swamps? Why have you come to Bull Rush? Well, we came here pretty unintentionally.

We were escaping the swamps because we murdered by accident Emperor of the Bullywugs. Bullywugs, yes. Thank you. Oh, yeah. No, we've heard of Bullywugs. We've seen them on the edge of the swamp before. Yeah, they are dicks. And pissed right now. Yes. Are they still out there? Well, I think they lost. We stole a magic artifact that they were worshipping, I think. Stole a magic artifact? Yeah, there's a lot that I still don't understand. What? Maybe Ixtay on the article magic, eh?

I don't speak your dirty elf tongue. Speak the common tongue. No, I understand. You don't have to say any more about this magical artifact if you don't want to. I understand. It might be. It might be. It might be. It might be. It might be. It might be. It might be worth a lot of money. We don't know. Oh, my God. Talk. Shut up. Hey, I'm not. I'm not saying anything else about this thing.

We were charged with a responsibility to take it to a very special place to keep it safe because it is a very probably expensive thing. I don't know. Oh, my God. It could be worthless. Or worth full of money. Anyway. It's mostly full of his poops, though. Also, yes. I do. I did lie about shitting inside of it, but there's definitely no shit in it. But we don't know that because we didn't have our eyes on it the whole time. So there might be poo in it.

Just a warning in case you're interested, which hopefully you're not because there's poo in it. Anyway, do you have a husband or companion? Says no, not as such. Cool. I'm a strong boy. I can see that. I can see that. Yes. One time I. I. What? One time I. Tell him, Tuck. Yeah. Yeah. Well, one time I saved a puppy. Great. Well done. That's very kind of you. That's very kind. And I'm also sensitive. Daisy kind of shuffles and. Yeah.

She's sticking her head in through the window like one of those one of the animals in the big friendly giant. Like she's just been listening to all of this. Do you guys all just kind of tell your tales? Because she lives in a small village. She's just thrilled. Sure. We can tell stories. Yeah. What's your story, little boy? Well, I'm nine. I think I grew up in the Everwood Valley with some other people like me, but not my parents.

I don't know where they went and no one really liked me that much. And so I had to leave. And then Tuck found me and he made me go with him. Made you made you go with him? Yes. Yes. You mean you didn't want to come with this man? Billy, what are you doing? Shut up. I didn't. Well, he never asked. He never asked if I wanted to go. He just kind of picked me up. And I and like, look at me. We didn't kidnap this naked boy. I did not. Yeah, I didn't take him.

We had like a moment in front of a fire over a jackalope. A non-sexual moment. Yes. He tried to steal jackalope from me and I didn't let him. And then we bonded. And then I didn't. I didn't ask him to come with me, but I definitely didn't kidnap him. I just put that morning. I put my pack on and I got my stuff together. I started walking away and then I looked back over my shoulder at Billy. And then I did one of these like what I I'm like, come on, kid. Well, I thought you had something for me.

And then I just followed you for a long time. You didn't have anything. So. Oh, we just kept walking, I guess. And then we got into adventures. And here we are. Yes. Wait, are you telling me we're together? Because you. Didn't realize I was inviting you to adventure with me. Look, I don't have like a lot of social skills. I'm just kind of learning on the fly here. He thought I was calling you over to give you something. And then we just walked for months. When's he going to give me that thing?

I'm still not sure if I'm getting anything or not. What about you, Elf? I'm just sort of trying to figure things out and I need money to do it. So I've lumped in with these lumps. Oh, that's wonderful. In West North Northfalia, I was born and raised. West Northfalia? Is that where you're from? On the frozen plains. I spent most of my days. What kind of stuff did you do? Mostly chilled out to the max because of how cold it was. And played ice ball most of the day. Yes.

Where would you usually play it? On the ice ball court. Oh, I don't know. So… Yeah, and you… Is there more to this? No, I forgot the rest of the song. Oh, you were a couple of guys who were up to no good. A couple of walruses that were up to no good started fucking my dad in my neighborhood. Wow. So my mom got mad and left my dad. And I left for the woods. I left for the woods. I'd like to point out that this contradicts almost everything you've said about Ving's backstory.

I'm assuming that it's because of the poison. I need to sleep. She says, well, you're welcome. You're all welcome to stay here in the hall for the night. And Hootier will be by in the morning to check you out. Make sure everything's good. And if there's anything that you need, just don't hesitate to ask. We're real kind here in Bolt Rush Village. Thank you. Yeah, of course. Of course. No problem. Thank you for regaling me with your tales of the outside world. Yes. Come back anytime. I will.

I will. I will. Yes. I will. I am single. Also. I remember. Cool. I'll see you around. Later. As a way. Pretty. Goodbye. And I bow. She walks out of the hall and you see like there's two old men on the other side of the hall that see you do that and hear you and they just laugh to each other. Yeah. So, you know what? Pick up nine wasn't half bad. Yeah, it was all bad. Fucking Stadler and Waldorf. That's like my favorite Stadler and Waldorf joke. It's good for everything. It's so good. Yeah.

So, and the sun begins to set. And yeah, you guys just sleeping here in the hall. I was maybe toying with the idea of finding where this, what's her name? Who dear? No, no. The other one. Allaki? Yeah. Finding where Allaki lives and writing her a poem. And then like telling it to her outside of her window. What is the? And then maybe, you know, trying to make a connection. Okay. Cause I think the poetry thing is kind of funny. Yeah.

If you want to do like a Romeo and Juliet Cyrano de Bergerac sort of bullshit. Billo, do you want to be my Cyrano? No, I'm busy. I have to do something. Okay. We'll cut back to that in a second. I want to see what this is. Okay. So the sun is, the sun is down. There are a couple of torches that have been lit around town. The fire in the hall is kind of stoked pretty consistently by just people that pass by. It seems like everybody's keeping an eye on the fire, making sure that it stays lit.

And what's Billy's plan for the evening? So Billy's been strolling around looking for something similar to a raccoon skin. Oh, okay. But all he sees are fish and he's like, maybe not. And so he feels like a pleasant breeze blown around his hair and his little, little grass skirt. And he goes and wanders and finds a little log to sit and dip his toes in the water. Oh, nice. And then he sings happy birthday to himself. Oh. Because he's 10 now. Oh no. Oh my God. Billy's 10 years old now?

Billy's 10. Oh, 10 year old boy. Oh, no matter. Oh man. But he thinks. Yeah. It just feels like the time is right. It feels like maybe it's around the time of his birthday. Yeah. That's cool. Yeah. It's kind of sad. Yeah. Well, he doesn't have parents, so. Yeah. So yeah, you're, you're singing whatever happy birthday. So does that sound like anything in particular? It's my birthday today. I think it's today. Happy birthday. Happy birthday. It's my birthday. Maybe. Maybe.

You hear like a little rustle in the grass near the river. And Wicker pokes her head out and hops up on the log and slowly walks up to you. And then I put my arms around her and we snuggle. Oh. He is. Man. What a good birthday. Oh. That's nice. Best birthday. Okay. So we'll cut to Ving now. Yeah. And Ving's just lying in the long grass like he was calling for Wicker. Wicker. But sleeping. Kind of like in a half crawled that fell asleep. Wicker. Wicker. Wicker. There you go. Wicker.

Something's just asleep in the grass. Yeah. Okay. Calling for Wicker's name. Beautiful. Did you guys leave all your stuff in the hall, I guess? Are you all like, I imagine you're not all hauling all your shit around. I have the bag of loot with me. Oh, the coins and the cup and the book? Yes. Okay. Cool. Cool. Cool. And the box. We never go anywhere without the box. Yeah. It's strapped to my back. The box is strapped to your back at all times? Always. Okay. It's the most important thing. Yeah.

Totally. Yes. Interesting. Okay. I won't put the cup down that was on my butt for so long. Oh, yeah. No. Thankfully, the cup is just a little bit full of poison. Just a tiny bit. It looks like you're just passed out. Like you got too drunk. You know what? Something to keep in mind. Billy the Poisoner. You have a little bit of that Gobbo poison available. I'll say one use. You don't know what it is. You don't know what it does. But you know, it's pretty messed up. Is it in a vial or something?

It's in the cup. Do I come? Oh, I know. You have it. You get it. This is just something to keep in mind. We don't have to mess with it right now if we don't want to. Because I was thinking if I was stumbling back from my log with Wicker in my arms. Oh, and you find Ving. Yeah, I find Ving and I could take the cup with me. Perfect. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. Okay, great.

So you just find Ving sprawled out in the grass with Wicker in your arms or walking with you because you're kind of almost the same size. I'm like dragging her. Yeah. Oh, like when a baby holds a cat under the front arms and just traps. Yeah. Yeah. So you grab the poison. And yeah, so now you have this little vial of or this little one, like one dose of goblin poison. But once you take some time to look at it with your new move brewer, you'll be able to remake it.

Can they overhear Ving like sleep, apologize? Like just to start the ball rolling and the ending of this. I'm so sorry. You want Wicker to hear that? I mean, are you saying it like a cat? Yeah. Okay. Yeah. So you hear Ving meowing. You don't know what it is, but you hear her here. Or you feel Wicker kind of tense up a little bit and like relax and tense up like she's trying to work through something. Yeah. And now we'll cut to Tacoma. To rest, to rest my head upon some bread. Punts of bread.

All right. Maybe at this point, Billy also walks by with a cat and a cup full of poison. Billy. What? Yeah. Good haul. Thanks. What are you doing? What did you do? Nothing. Okay. You know, I believe you because we're friends. Yep. Do you need help? Yes. I'm writing a poem. Oh, okay. Do you want to hear what I have so far? Yeah. Okay. To the beautiful Aleki. It's for Aleki. I kind of got that. Yes. And it's so that I can have adult. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I know. Time with her.

I have seen this. Yeah. I'm sorry about that. It's fine. Yes. It is in this case though, it will be both of us, not just me alone in the reeds. Oh, okay. Oh, I haven't seen that then. Okay. Cool. Mostly just a lot of what you do. Yeah. Which you also call adult alone time. Yes. This is couples adult alone time that I'm trying to persuade her to help with. Okay. I'm just like really confused. Billy, you'll understand when you grow old and you need the touch of another. I'm sorry.

I don't know how much to tell you. Like my father died when I was very young, my adopted father, and he was maybe too open about this kind of stuff. He would walk around with a house robe open, no underwear. It's weird. So, I'm trying to protect you from that. Billy's already sat down. Okay. I'm going to be a while. All right. But that's the context of this poem that I'm writing. Okay. So, I'm going to find her home and then tell it to her. Okay.

And then hopefully, then the rest will unfold like I want it to. Here's the poem so far. To the beautiful Alaki, you have put a spell on me. Nice. Pretty good. Yes. Your supple breasts- Okay. Are on your chest. Yep. Your eyes so green, the hue of a ball runs. Oh, I love that. I love that. I love that. The hue of a ball rug spleen. Nice. Yeah. Yeah. Okay. That's all I have. I mean, I think she'll be into it. It kind of covers everything.

I want to go in with like this and then this is what I want to do to you. Okay. I was thinking to rest my head upon your bed. Okay. Uh. There's a woman. There's a woman. There's a woman. There's a woman. There's a woman.

Tacoma like Tacoma writing like a rhyming poem That's just A-B-A-B Or A-A-B-B-C-C-D-D And Billy just suggesting any word He can think of On fire Okay great You're just humoring your child basically That's good On fire My head upon your bed To make you feel on fire That's nice I thought so Your hands are like A bunch of Grapes Yeah Your hands are like a bunch of grapes Your hands are like a bunch of grapes Sorry go ahead No please I was just gonna riff Like They make me feel Like Shit Nothing rhymes with grapes Well cut to Thing Asleep in the grass Overcoming the effects of the poison and the medicine You have a dream Tell me about the last time That you saw your father It was The day of my mother's funeral And it was in the frozen north No he didn't come back To her funeral So I left her funeral And went straight I It was the first time That I turned Into An owl Which was Her favorite animal She died And My sadness Was the first time that I was able to fully turn That was the first time you turned into anything?

Yeah fully And it was a White owl Snow owl That's pretty cool And I took off to the forest to confront him What was that like?

Awful It was very hard emotionally In Ving's mind In his dreamscape We see Flapping The trees Blizzard in my face Yeah forever Tears frozen on my owl's cheek And then the trees Kind of come out of the snow And the daunting Wall Of forest That is the beginning of the great forest That stretches for miles and miles and miles and miles and miles And you come back to the forest and you're like come upon your father he's sitting on a stump like deep in the trees what do elves look like like we do are they are we just talking like tolkien like pale pointy ears long hair pretty much uh but like way more flaps like they don't wear as much clothing as elves do in in okay so it's like more burning man yeah clothing brighter colors okay yeah and he's he's sitting on a stump and he's he's carving uh a shaft for an arrow and he looks up because he sees the the owl swoop through the trees uh and I circle and fall on the ground and uh and confront him about my mother's death and asked him why he wasn't there he says you know I couldn't and why paul why wasn't he allowed to go I always thought in my adolescent sort of naivete that because because he didn't respect her because she was a human I thought he was too much of a snob an elven snob but what was the real reason she was he was scared of her she was very powerful oh she was how is she powerful I don't entirely know oh I always thought that the father was the one where I got my powers oh but the truth is is that and ving doesn't even really understand this but it was from your mother but me oh okay so uh in your dream he says that to you he explains like I couldn't go she was too powerful she'd never forgive me for what I did and there's a quivering the air is quivering behind him like he's sitting at a wi-fi hotspot oh in the dream okay and maybe my mom's watching from beyond it she could be a wizard I don't know what okay I'm having a sense yeah yeah yeah yeah pretty dope um and he looks up at you and he says you shouldn't have come here uh I I said you should have been there oh and uh he the last thing he says is you shouldn't have come here and he stands up and he knocks the arrow he's been carving and he shoots it at you you wake up yeah exactly just the moon right above you right in your face yeah I could see my breath you see the silhouette of an owl against the moon yeah and just barely a parrot in the distance I noticed that I have a large like a boner like a night erection really big one all right and then we cut back to tuck and billy uh wicker has kind of wriggled out of your arms at this point and she's getting a little peckish so she wanders off to go hunt okay so you're yeah you're you find uh aliki's um uh house and you're like yes and uh like all of the living spaces in this it's the living spaces in in bulrush village are either small one family shacks or they're large buildings where multiple families live together and uh unfortunately for you aliki lives in the one one of the ones with multiple families uh okay so how do you get her attention well we're walking up and I'm like thanks for helping with this billy oh did I go to the hospital I'm like I'm gonna go to the hospital I'm gonna go to the hospital I'm gonna go to the hospital I'm gonna go to the hospital I'm gonna go to the hospital come along for this yes you wanted me to witness what you want to do with you want me a witness adult bedroom memories yeah I don't want you to watch what we do after but as your surrogate father you should see how or your mom uh we you should see how this is done just so you know how to do it when the time comes you're training billy how to pick up yes so you the first thing you do is you neg them you you're like hey you give them a compliment that is also an insult and then you touch them it's called establishing kino and then you escalate and then you move to a different location it's all in this book called the game I was gonna say is this copyrighted pickup material yes all right so how do you get how do you get aliki's attention uh I I'm like okay I'm gonna okay aliki aliki this is slowly torches being lit here and you see um the the house is dark because it's nighttime and people are sleeping yes and you see um you see a figure stand in the window is that you aliki who's that what no I don't want are you are you aliki who is this who are you it's the middle of the goddamn night I understand that so stop making so much fucking noise you're you're shouting yes and so are you so maybe this is a situation where you shouldn't throw stones from a house that I can probably fucking push over aliki some guys here trying to knock our house down aliki aliki please come quickly aliki and then she like she's like what what is going what is going on tacoma is that is that you yes aliki it's the small boy yes uh he's not gonna be involved much longer in this thing that we're doing what I wanted to um I uh I want I I start to get really nervous now uh I I when I saw you in the hall I was taken by your beauty um and I uh I want I wrote you a poem um and it's um um!!

Um! Um! I think I'm in love with you for crab's sakes. Hey, Lucky. I know this world is right for you. Hey, Lucky. My lust is true. Okay. And Vink comes walking out of his cabin. You guys thought he was in bed. Okay. Okay. 1D6 plus 1D8. And if the D6 is higher than the D8 in outcome, then something bad happens. Okay. So maybe do it separately. Or something complicates the situation based on your mortal pleasure. You have to do it separately. I hope it is because I would love to complicate this.

So the D6 is 4 and the D8 is 5. Oh. And I got a 9. Plus your charisma. Plus 1 is 10. Plus my charisma is… This really worked out for me. Tuck is doing well in the ladies. Plus 2. So 12. Nope. 11. Where did that plus 1 come from? It was because it's a mortal pleasure. Do you get plus 1 when you're doing that? Yes. No, it's that you roll a D6 and a D8. Oh, okay. So you have the possibility of rolling higher because you have an extra 2. Okay. Then 11. Fuck me. Nope.

Throughout the song, you can initially see, especially when you got to your supple breasts are on your chest. She kind of scrunches up her face a little bit. But then throughout the rest of the song, she kind of softens a little bit and she's smiling like she more or less thinks it's funny. She's like, okay. All right. That was… That was something else. Thank you. How about you go back to the hall? You get some sleep and I'll see you in the morning.

Oh, I really thought that the winning roll would have got me a different result. Okay. Okay. The winning roll doesn't mean that you automatically get to… Fuck somebody. That's what I was trying to do with the poll. No, but you have made a positive impression on her. It's just not like… You're not going to be like, hey, do you want to go fuck in that room full of your family members? No, that's not a poll. Well, I assume you have a corner that is your home.

But she says, I'll see you in the morning. I liked your song. Thank you. I liked your song. I have another song called Bring Me to Life. If you want to hear it, me and Billy can do it as a duet. I don't really want to. Well, I'll just do it on my own then. I'll do both parts. That's fine. Yes. She says, I just… How about you? That was great. That was great. Thank you. Thank you for… No one's ever written me a song before. It's kind of my thing, gallery owner. I'll see you in the morning.

La tropes. That's how we say goodbye in certain communities, I think. Good night, Tacoma. Bye, Alecky. Get the hell out of here. Hey, fuck you, old man. I'll come out there and I'll fuck you up. Man, do it. I don't… I am flying so high right now. I'll see you in the morning. I will see you in the morning. Okay, then. Good. I'll see you at breakfast. Neither of you know what each other looks like. Good night, then. Good night. I hope you sleep well, old man. I will. Good. I hope you do, too.

I hope you have dreams of pumpkin spice. That's… Specific, but I'm into it. Yeah, it's delicious. I hope you reflect on some personal troubles and you wake up in the morning feeling a bit better about it. I hope I will, and I appreciate your sentiment. I feel like I've made a good friend tonight. Good. Me, too. I feel like we are birds of a feather. Now get the hell out of here, you piece of shit. Fuck you. Okay, so yeah, you guys do a quick… You guys do a little interstitial.

Bing's there now, too. Yeah. Oh, yes. He's going to walk by. That was… Amazing. Thank you. Billy helped a lot with the song. And moral support. Yes. Because he made me. Yes. I forced him, too. You gotta force a Billy. Yes. But thanks for helping with that, guys. You're welcome. Do you think she liked it? Oh, yeah. She liked it. Yeah? She loved it. I can't tell, but it seemed okay. Man, awesome. I think everybody loved it. Yeah. That's the sense I got. The whole town didn't seem to mind.

Everyone does seem to be awake now. Everyone? Yeah. Yeah, you see like a man, just like a middle-aged man, standing outside of one of the huts, like rubbing his eyes and looking at you like really angrily. Hey, did you like that song? And he just like picks up a spear. I'm going to say that's a resounding yes. He doesn't. He's fine. You carry on. And you guys make it back to the hall. There are people here and there.

You get the impression that if people don't have like a family or a large family, they just kind of sleep in the hall. So there's people like curled up in the corners and slumped near the fire, just kind of hanging out. There's a couple. Those old men from earlier are both like face down on the table next to each other with like empty mugs in front of them, just kind of snoozing into each other's faces. Dan is curled up in a corner, sleeping on his little satchel. Do horses sleep standing up?

No. Yes. Who knows for sure? Daisy's asleep in whatever configuration a horse usually sleeps in. Cool. You see her at like outside the window. Nice. And yeah, your little corner is all warm and toasty. Nice. Go to bed. All right. I'm wide awake. I literally just woke up. After a good like poison fever dream where your dad killed you. Yeah. I got some shit to work at. So I just go and say good. Night to guys and go pick the biggest log and throw in the fire. Yeah.

Sit down next to it and tend the fire for people. I imagine for some reason what I imagined was that you said goodbye to everyone and then you went out into a glade in the moonlight and you did Tai Chi. It was Qigong. And yeah, that's where we'll call it for tonight. As the as the moon carries on on its journey across the skies. End of session questions. Anybody have a bond they feel like has been resolved? Yeah, I don't have any bonds. Yeah, I figured it's more.

It was more of a story session when you guys kind of hung out with people. Anybody fulfill their alignment? Is that song in? Yeah, I'd say waking everybody up in the middle of the night to sing a loud song about wanting to fuck somebody in the town. Most of it was about.

Love yeah I would just like to point that out some of it was about boobies yeah it's definitely saying the song is about just fucking her is a bit reductive and I don't appreciate it you're totally right how wrong of me but you're dead but it was definitely a skewing a convention of the civilized world so I get xp for the first time ever I think that's that that technically I have done it before have you done it before okay uh all right well great so now you get a point uh help someone or something grow I'd say that wicker is a little more able to understand like she has she's a little more obstinate now she's a little more proud and okay no I would say I wonder if it does it apply that like your dream sequence kind of helped a little bit but it's more someone or it's not yourself it's other people it's something the story of ving and oh I don't know if that applies um it's also more um um um um um um um um um um uh tomorrow tolerance the greatest treasure of all of woman being okay with being around you sometimes yes uh then no I guess I guess not that that ends today's episode thanks for listening my name is Sean O'Hara and the players today as always have been jessica crepe sake abdul it's a type of sandwich and paul I'm asleep thanks to west for his technical expertise thanks to erin and heckler's bar and grill for letting us record upstairs in the ratfish lounge and thank you to erin reed for our awesome theme song thank you to adam coble and sage latora for creating the system of Dungeon World which is uh based on a game called apocalypse world by d vincent baker which is also very cool and you should check it out uh you can find more about that by googling Dungeon World thanks for listening everybody and we'll see you next week and so ends the tale of adventures three who tried the best they can though dumb and scared and lost they be for times of rest in revelry and though our journey may be like a conclusion we will not leave you without a resolution return next week to hear some more whilst you commute or do your chores and for you I'd gladly sorry I'm just looking up evanescence lyrics billy's that was the most quickly I've seen west become disappointed you could just ask me because I'll know them all