Episode 1 – Profits & Schass

Gather round, friends, let me tell you a tale of three heroes, noble and bold. A brute, a druid, and a thief who is but nine years old. You know them by name, you know them by deed, their quests are famously daring. So here I sit, singing to you an adventure that is worth sharing. Tuck is the brute, he knows not his home, he loves to sing and fight. Fingers have health, he shifts his shape, and wields a spear with great might. Billy's a thief, his tiny size does mask the largest heart.

Best and brightest they may not be, but their friendship outweighs their smarts. So gather round, friends, and listen close, for the tale's about to start. Welcome to Spout Lore, a Dungeon World podcast where we are playing the Dungeon World RPG by Adam Kovach. It's available in Sage Latoura. It is a hack of a game called Apocalypse World by D. Vincent Baker. I'm your game master, Sean O'Hara. We're here with the players. Hi, how's it going? Good, how are you? I'm very good, I'm very excited.

Paul, tell me about your character. My character is Ving Zumba. I'm a druid, human, neutral good, change shifter, shapeshift. Yeah, druid shapeshift. Yeah, I'm hailing from those frozen plains, let me hear you. Do we have anybody from the frozen plains here? This guy knows what I'm talking about. I got a staff, a bunch of flaps, poultices. Ving's got wild, crazy kind of grayish hair, lots of pelts, different hides, almost like a skirt of hides, and then hides around his forearms.

And also he has gills. He has gills? Yeah. Why does he have gills? Well, that's what defines him. Oh. Oh, right. When he changes his… Druids. Yeah, they have to have it. Druids always have a tail that sticks with them as they change shapes, so… Like an arctic char. Yeah, like an arctic char. Like an arctic char. So Ving has gills like an arctic char, and if you were to turn into a polar bear, that polar bear would also have gills like an arctic char.

He puts his crazy wild hair over his gills, so nobody sees him, like Kevin Costner would if he ever made a movie about that. All right, yeah, I like it. I assume that we'll know more about them as we go. Yep, that is one of the tenets of Dungeon World, is play to find out what happens. Just like real life. Just like real life. And next, Abdul Aziz. Hey. Hey, Abdul. Tell me about your character. I play Tacoma Dome. He's a barbarian who has a lot of emotional problems.

He was abandoned as a baby, and he blames himself for that. But he was raised by… A used cart dealer in the city of McCall. His name was Bruce Spruce. And he instilled good values in me until he died when I was four. And then I left, me as Tacoma. Tacoma left town because he was chased out of town. And then he lived as a man of the world, a child of the world, for years. Like as a sword for hire for a while. And then he was part of a… A band for a little while. Like a band?

Like a music band? Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. What does… Does he play an instrument? He played the bass. Oh, okay. That makes sense. Yeah. And he got really into opium for a couple of years. And then he found barbarism again. He rediscovered it. And he's kind of been… Like kind of rediscovering himself through the violence that he inflicts on people that he thinks deserve it. Describe Tacoma. What does Tacoma look like? I, uh… I'm tan of skin and large of thigh. Uh, I'm bald of head by choice.

I'm wearing a leather loin guard. Uh, I have an axe strapped across my back. I'm very… Very large. Yeah, like large for a person. Like too large. Yes, I'm maybe… I'm like seven feet tall. Whoa. Wowzers. That's a big boy. Yes. I'm a muscular seven foot. Uh-huh. Mm-hmm. I'm in a bulk phase right now. Uh, I do a lot of, uh… Plyometric exercises. Is that a thing? Is that a fantasy thing? Um, yes and no. Hmm. Is that why you stopped… Wearing pants? Because they always wore out in the crotch?

They wore out in the middle where it would… It would rub. Hmm. Um, so… And it was constricting for barbarism. I didn't… I didn't get a good range of motion. You could probably light a match off your inner thigh. You could. If you put a match there, I could probably light it. What is a festival that Tuck remembers from McCall that he misses? Oh, there was the fireworks festival. Mm-hmm. Uh, everyone would buy fireworks and go into balconies and then fire them into other balconies. Ha ha ha!

Uh… What was the purpose of this festival? Was it to, like, settle scores with other families? It… Officially, it was to celebrate the birth of the prophet of fire. So that officially is it, and then unofficially, yes, it is to settle scores with your neighbors. Ha ha ha! Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Most of the, uh, structures in Macau are made of straw or wood. Oh, shit. Mm.

So once every four months, the whole city burns to the ground. Mm. Uh, and, uh, that was always a very, uh, heartwarming time. Quite literally. Yes. Uh, many die. Ha ha ha! It's a beautiful festival. Mm-hmm. That's nice. The prophet of fire. I want to, we're going to explore more of that later. That's, does, is, is Tuck religious at all? I acknowledge the possibility of the existence of the prophet of fire and the, the god of the flame, but I also… God of the flame, you're really laying it on.

God of the flame. I also have seen no conclusive evidence for it. If he is truly a vengeful and hateful god, I don't believe the god of the flame would care if you believed in him or not. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. That the most logical position is to just be an agnostic. Mm-hmm. Ving, you travel with an ag, with a guy that's, spirits might exist, but Ving knows they exist. Yeah. Right?

Is that, is that the, that's the source of… Well, I think most elves know of the spirit world, right? Well, I believe in ghosts. I've fought ghosts. Fought ghosts. Yes. It's the same thing, right? The spirit world's what lets me travel between bodies. So that's what, you travel into the spirit world. Yeah. And then you come back in a different body. I'm traveling within the spirit world, but yeah. Okay. And that's what allows Ving to like change shape? Yeah. That's pretty dope.

How, how old is Tacoma? Cause this is a lot of… Like mid twenties now. He's had a long life. He's, well, like he did, he lost the only father he had ever known in that freak cart accident. Yeah. There's, there's a stack of carts that fell over. Hello. Hi, Jessica. Tell me about your character. My character is Fat Billy and he is very, he's very fat. Fat Billy is a halfling kid. He's very small, very round. I think he's about seven to nine. Seven to nine. Maybe nine to 10. Is that?

Can we go seven to 10? It's true. I guess nobody would really tell him how old he is. No one knows. Billy doesn't know. So how big is that for a halfling? It's small. Like two feet, you know? Cause he's a big boy. Well, he's the same size lying down. Yeah, exactly. He's very dirty. He has small feet and hands. A very rosy face. Does he have a bulbous nose? No, it's very small. Oh. So he's just small and like chubby and has like tiny hands. He's just little.

The thing about halflings is it's hard to tell their age. Tuck is right. Is this something Tuck's had experience with? Yeah. Well, it's hard to tell, you know? You meet a halfling and you're like… Hey, do you want to come on a quest? And then the halfling goes, yes. And then turns out you have a child with you. We thought he was in his forties. Is that how Tuck and Fat Billy met up? Is you assumed that he was older? Well, that's more how our fellowship formed. All three of you?

We have a child with us. And we thought we are happy with him now. When we recruited him originally. We thought that he'd be helping. I did nothing to dissuade… No, no, yeah. To convince you of my age. It was assumptions. Yes. And now look at us. Yeah, it's just hard to tell halflings. What class is Fat Billy? He's a thief. What sort of stuff does the thief do? Like what does Fat Billy do? Yeah, what's his life like? His life is lonely. It's lonely. He's on the road a lot.

On the road with his friends? No. No? Not until now. Until now. Oh, but before this he was alone. Before this, yeah. So we are friends. I hope so. Where halflings come from, water is scarce? It was a lot of farming, but I think it was mostly scarce because no one would let Fat Billy have water. Oh, like Billy, it was scarce to Billy. Yes. Oh, okay. What's the halfling country like? Is it pretty farmy? A little bit, some parts, but they're like little farms. Okay. Everyone has their own.

They have their own farm. Oh. But they share, families will share, but I didn't have a family, so no one shared with Fat Billy. So he left? No, he was kicked out. Oh, right, because he burned down grain silos. He might have built, maybe. Allegedly. Allegedly. He might have burned down something. Accidentally, deliberately, who knows? Was it an accident? Always. Yes. For real, though. This is me. You're talking to Tacoma. Yes, it was. Yes. Huh. Still some denial, I see. No. Fat Billy's ashamed.

Billy, if I light this match on my thighs and I hand it to you, what will you do with it? I might drop it. I don't really know how to handle flames. Okay. But I'll do my best. Don't do it, Tac. I won't. I'm not going to give it to him. I'm a small child. Why would you give me an open flame? Yes. I'm just, I wanted to see how he would react. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes.

The three of you have been on the road for a couple days, and you are traveling to the village of Mudlark. Sorry, Blugblark? Bloodblark. Yeah, it's a lot of Ys. No, it's just Mudlark. Mudlark. It's a small town, and I want you guys to tell me what the environment around Mudlark is like. Oh, it's a real piece of shit. Boggish. Yeah, it's… Pretty boggy. It is muddy. It's mud. I can't tell if it's steam or if it's fog. I can't see through it. It's a mud fog. It's a red mud fog. The mud is red?

Yeah, but there's birds. Yes, mud birds. It is definitely a bit of a stinking mire. Stinking mire. Yes. The old stinking mire. Great. It reminds me of a woman I knew. Her name was Janine. And she shoplifted a lot because there was an emptiness inside of her. And she needed the thrill of theft to fill that emptiness. I know. Yeah. I know what that's like. That's what this place feels like. It's like you're hanging out with Janine. Like you're looking in Janine's empty eyes. Her blue…

Muddy eyes. Great. So as you were saying that for 45 unbroken minutes, you hear next to you just a painful just… Because you guys are escorting somebody to the village of Mudlark for a festival. Who are you escorting? I'm… Paul. Ving, who are you escorting? Paul. The food cart guy. It's a food cart guy. Yeah, he's in charge of all the meals. Oh, heck yes. Okay. So is it a cart with food in it? Or is it a cart that is just going… No, with ingredients in it. It's not food. Ingredients.

Okay, what kind of food is this guy going to be making? All sorts of fantasy food. Schloss steaks. Schloss steaks. Smoked schlarken and ribs. Mustards. Mustard. Many mustards. All right, so it's just like… I don't know why he's in such a panic, but he is. This guy's really worked up. Yeah, okay. Over his food. This guy. So do we have a name for this guy? Dan. Dan. Colonel Dan. Colonel Dan. Is his first name Colonel or was he a Colonel? I think that they just call him the Colonel.

Oh, they call him the Colonel. Colonel is his title. Yeah. Colonel Dan. No last name. Fosse. Fosse. Dan Fosse. Is Dan Fosse a guy that we know? I don't know. It sounds like it, doesn't it? Sounds good. Is that the guy that made all those musicals? No, he hung out with gorillas in the mist. That's the one. Oh, Diane Fosse. There you go. That's who we're thinking about. Great. So you're taking Colonel Dan Fosse to the village of Mudlark with his cart full of food. It's meat that has been…

Kebabbed. Yes. Kebabbed, then pulled, then kebabbed again. It's just a lot… Is that what a schloss is? It is. It is. This is what you guys… You guys have been learning all about this over the last couple of days as Colonel Dan's been like… It's a real Bubba Gump kind of thing. Where he's just like schloss parfait, schloss salad, schloss sandwiches. Yes. Schloss salad. Real schloss. Boiled schloss. It's just for two full days.

And the one of the other things that I want you guys to tell me is what is the festival in Mudlark? Why is everybody going to Mudlark? Jessica. Fat Billy. It's a hot dog. It's a hot dog festival. It's a hot dog festival? Yes. That's what all the mustards are for. Okay. Yeah. Oh, so is he taking the schloss stuff as like… Is there a type of hot dog that's made out of this meat? That's what a hot dog is called in this town. The pulled meat gets reformed into a hot dog formation.

It's served on a bun with many condiments. And people love it. People just love hot schloss. There is… It's so good. It's so good. It's so good. It's so good. That's why they come to this nasty hellhole. I'm excited. I'm excited. Okay, yeah. It's kind of like Burning Man. So describe to me how it is. It's kind of like Burning Man? Yeah. Yes. But with like hot dogs? Yeah. And Stinking Mire. Yeah. People come a long ways away and they don't know why they're there and everyone's got flaps on.

Yeah. Well, because all the steam and or fog and or mist, you have to like aerate the air. There's a ton of air. Oh, it gets, like, swampy? Yeah. It's like a test to see who would go the distance. That acts as a filter, so you only get like-minded people at this hot dog festival. Oh, I see. So people will stop before they get to Mudlark because it's so gross. Yeah, so there's going to be a lot more annoying people at this festival. If Colonel Dan's anything.

Festival has its own economy that is based on free love. And hot dog meat. Yeah. Tubular dudes. Yes. There's a, I hear sometimes that there's a pirate ship. I've heard of the pirate ship. Yes. So there's, wait, is there a pirate ship just in the mud, or does a river go through Mudlark? A river runs through it, yes. I thought Mudlark was the river, and the river dried up, and now Mudlark lies within the dried up river. Oh, yeah. Gotcha.

So it's like it was once a river, and now it's just a big mud field. Follow the mud. Delta land. Yeah, like in The Wizard of Oz, except the Golden Road is mud. And poo. I heard that people live in boats that are stuck in the mud. Yeah. That's pretty dope. Yes. Boats stuck in the mud. All right. So you guys are escorting Colonel Dan to Mudlark for the hot dog festival. He's probably like in his like- 110. He's 110 years old. Whoa. Because he is- He's an elf. He's an elf? Yes.

So 110 is like a smooth 30, 30, 40? Yeah, he was younger. Not a lot of elderly elves will own a food cart. That's true. It's more of like an early in life sort of thing. Before enlightenment. Now, is Ving not part elf? Ving is part elf. Okay. So how are Ving and Dan getting along? Well, I'm embarrassed by that connection. Also, Ving really likes to cook. Oh. Right? He's a good poultice. He can make things from the land. So this guy going on about hot dogs. It's just a little too close to home.

And he's an elf. So he doesn't want to be identified with this guy. Okay. But he feels a kinship nonetheless. Like a family thing. You know, like a cousin who comes up to you at a bar and rubs your back before you know who's there. Fat Billy doesn't know what this is like to have family. Yes, neither does Tacoma. Well, it's annoying. Oh, would that I knew the frustration of the touch of family. Of the familiar blood. Yes. Of the- Comforting caress. Yes. Well, I think you're lucky.

The touch of skin that covers blood that is like mine. I have never known. That's fair. I've never seen anyone like you, Tac. I have- A brown person? Yeah. I'm from the frozen north elf man. That's true. So what are Tac and Fat Billy doing in the cart while they're- I've eaten a lot. I have also eaten a lot and I don't want them to know. So you've just been like- You've stolen a lot. Maybe. You've just in the back like gorging like a raccoon. Yes. Yes. But how's Fat Billy feeling about this?

Well, pretty good. Because he- He doesn't know. He's just like, why not? So Tacoma is in the back with Fat Billy, I guess, eating. What is- Describe Tacoma. What does Tacoma look like? I'm lying on the ground in the back of the cart with a pile of jerky on my tummy. And I- What I'm- I'm- I'm- I'm- I'm flicking it up into the air and catching it in my mouth. And I'm going, woohoo. And Billy's- Billy's back there with Tacoma eating the jerky? Yeah. Great.

It's like I'm eating the ones that he's missing. So I just run around him and I collect the rest. Well, Fat Billy doesn't believe in waste, so. Yes. That's reasonable. Yes. The halflings are very- They believe in balance. Yes. And vulturism. Yes. Scavengers, traditionally. So Ving, you're up front with Dan while these two are in the back and you're kind of having conversations through the hole in the cart in this covered wagon. And it's very foggy to either side.

You're on a muddy road going into the boggy region surrounding Mudlark. And there's thick, white, smelly, kind of like gaseous fog. You can't really see that far in front of you. And so the horse is kind of struggling along in the mud. Yanking the cart along and out of the fog on the road. There's just a big fallen tree right across the road. And Dan kind of pulls over. He's like, whoa. Oh, man. We're not getting any further with this tree in the road.

You guys want to take care of this or something? My knees are tired. I don't want to get up. There's no way around. It's just swamp on either side. Like just right into swamp. I'll just hop right out. I'll take it. Take a crack at what's happening. Yeah. All right. Billy, do you want to come? I'll let you ride on my shoulders. Okay, I'll do that then. So Tuck and Billy jump out of the cart. Billy riding on Tuck's shoulders like the kid from the Iron Giant.

And right into the slimy mud and the fog. And you walk around to the front of the cart. And there's just like a big, huge, like probably four feet across. Just a big tree trunk right across the road. Can his axe take care of it? Can you give her a chop? I mean, that would probably take a long time to cut through. What if we leave the cart? Dan says, no way. This got all my schloss meat in it. I'm not leaving this cart behind.

Also, there's no way we'd make it through the rest of this fog without shelter. We can't move. It's too heavy to move. You haven't tried moving it yet. Oh, let's try and move it. I was going to just throw the horse over the tree. Oh, yeah. Instead of moving the tree, you were going to pick a horse up? Yes. I bet the tree weighs more than a horse. I guess so. Yeah. I mean, it seems like the easier thing to do. Can I assess the situation? How would Billy be assessing the situation?

Like, maybe he can… Let's gravel up that tree, see what's going on. Yeah. What's on the other side? Yeah, what's on the other side? Sounds great. Is there a way through here that I can't see? Yeah. All right. That sounds like a discern realities. All right. So you're going to roll 2d6 plus wisdom. Okay. 12. 12. Damn. Yes. Unmitigated success. That's incredible.

So on a 12, you get three questions from this list, and you take plus one forward when you're acting on the answers that you get from these questions. So the questions you can choose from are what happened here recently, what is about to happen, what should I be on the lookout for, what here is useful or valuable to me, or who's really in control here, and what here is not what it appears to be. Can I do what happened here recently? What happened here recently?

What happened here recently is this tree. You can see sort of like by the way the roots like came out of the mud, like on the far end. This didn't fall naturally. This was pushed into the road. Okay. So Fat Billy scratches his little chin, and he's like, what should I be on the lookout for then? All right. You think that you should probably be on the lookout for whatever pushed this over, whatever or whoever. No, seriously. I know. It's not going to give you all the answers.

You want, but a lot of the times this isn't going to give you the answers that you need. So something pushed this over. So you think that if they're not here now, that they might be here soon. Okay. What else? What else is Fat Billy wondering? So there's, yeah, the other ones you haven't asked are what is about to happen, what here is useful or valuable to me, who's really in control here, what here is not what it appears to be. Okay. Fat Billy wants to know what here is valuable or useful.

Um, okay. So Fat Billy's kind of scrabbling around on top of the log, looking around, going like, oh, somebody, something pushed this over. And in the mud, um, near the base of the tree off the side of the road, you can see something shiny sticking out of, oh, of the mud just a little bit. Get it, Billy. Okay. I'm going to try to get it out. Okay. Wait, but what is it? At first, Billy's like, oh, yeah. Shiny stuff. I'm into this.

Billy digs it out of the mud and it's a spear blade, like hammered out. So it's not like professionally forged or if it was, it's been used a lot. Cause it's been like repaired really haphazardly kind of just like smashed with something hard, like a hammer or a rock. And it snapped off just below the blade. So there's a sheared spear, sheared spear, spear was sheared. So it's pretty small then if it's a spearhead. Yeah. It's about like eight or nine inches long. Yeah.

And it's just like a, like a kind of roughly adhered to a broken piece of shaft. Can I see that? Can I look at it? Yes. All right. I want to, I want to look at it. I want to see if I can recognize the make or the material or anything. If I know anything about it. Yeah. So that'll be a Spout Lore, which you will roll 2d6 plus intelligence. Okay. Six. Oh, a six? Six. Six. Six. Six. Six. Six. Six. Six. Six. Six. Six. Oh, that's a, that's a failure. So you mark an experience point.

Cause you're in Dungeon World. You always get an experience point when you fail. That's like one of the main ways to get experiences to fail something. Okay. Uh, let me see the spear. Well, no, no, no. Actually. Yeah.

Maybe that, no, like maybe that's the failure is that instead of you getting a good look at it, I'll look at it, but I feel like the failure should probably be on faith instead of, Oh, we can't just, we can't just, we can't just, we can't just, we can't just, we can't just pass it around. Well, anyway, so you're like trying to like, you're looking at the spear and you're like, where, what do I know about this? And you realize, I don't know a lot about this spears.

Uh, but it looks like it was made, uh, like this is probably just something that somebody lost on the way. There's no chunks of wood on it. I guess I failed. You did fail. So what you, what, what Ving believes is that, Oh, this is not important. Probably somebody just found this. Like it was just somebody's spear that broke and they lost it in the mud and it's just made. This is going to help us with this tree situation. This is nothing at all. All right. Yeah. Nothing to worry about here.

You can have this back, Billy. Wait, I do want to examine that. It's not really how the game, like if somebody fails a role, it's not just like, I can't look at it. Okay. No one else looks at it. What you can do is you can aid or interfere. Ving owns the fucking spear now. It's not important. Okay. It doesn't matter. Fine. If you want to help somebody, you can roll plus your bond with them to aid or interfere. And if you succeed, they get a plus one.

And if you get a seven to nine, uh, you expose yourself to danger, retribution or cost. And if you fail, then a hard move happens. So he already failed. Yes. But you can help somebody after a failure. Oh, but it only adds a plus one, which would make it a seven, which is a partial success and not a failure. Oh, okay. Yeah. Yes. I'll do that. All right. Let me help you examine that spear. Get that spear out, big boy. Let me take a look. I get up. I come up behind him.

My head is above his head because I'm so tall and I put my arms on his arms while he's examining the spear. And I say, let's look at it together. Do you remember what your bond with, how many bonds you have with Ving? Two. Two. I think I had the max. I think he, yeah, he had two with me and he had two with Ving. Okay, great. So yeah. So you'll be rolling. I'm rolling 2d6 plus two. Okay. To help Ving. All right. Let's look at this. I don't think it's anything. I don't see anything.

Let's take a second. Look, I rolled a seven. Plus two is nine. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. So yeah. Great. That's a, so you succeed. Well, it's a partial success. So it's a plus one, which makes your roll a seven instead of a six. So it's not a failure. So erase that experience point, my dude. Huh. Thanks. Uh, I will on a seven to nine. I will tell you something interesting. It's only, it's on you to make it useful. Okay.

So what you do see is that this was in fact of like human make, like it is, it was made by humanoid hands, dwarf elf, human, whatever. Somebody made this in a town, in a village, probably not far from here, but this blade was not originally attached to this and it's been hammered by rough unskilled hands. To like keep it in shape and to sharpen it and stuff like that. So it's, it's not, it wasn't being used in the way that it was made to be used.

Still a spear, but not maintained by a skilled or intelligent person. Somebody chopped down the tree with the spear maybe? No, I don't think so. Hmm. What does Billy think? Billy thinks we should get out of here. Yeah. I can just throw the horse over the tree. Leave the cart. It was always my, I'll throw the cart over the tree too. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Try and move the tree. Like it's. Does anyone have a large, a long lever arm?

I have a staff. I have a staff. Okay. Is it unbreakable? Sure it is. Okay. Can I just claim that? Because I just did my unbreakable staff. Yeah. Your unbreakable staff. It's made of wood. It's never, it hasn't broken yet. Yeah. As far as you know, it is unbreakable. Oh no. There, so there, yeah. Like how would you guys go about, do you want to try and move the tree? Well, yeah. I'm thinking about how I would do. Well. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

I mean things are shape shifting Can we hook the horse up to it maybe And lug it out of there Is there another tree nearby Are there other trees A simple pulley system Yeah if we like throw We throw up a pulley And then we attach the horse to it Why don't we wrap the rope we have In our packs And then we toss that rope Over a tree and then we use that to like Pull up the tree up With the horse Or with the tuck Oh yes I can also do that If I fought the horse Would I win It's hard to say it's a tough horse Can I work together with the horse Sure yeah that sounds good You can also help each other So somebody mark off a point Of their adventuring pack I will use mine So just mark one of those off to get a rope And yeah I guess this will be Like a defy danger To make a pulley system Yeah and I mean defy danger Is in a way it's a pretty catch all Sort of move So you're going to be rolling a defy danger strength Most likely And Does anybody want to aid I'd like to aid but I have Pretty I can You guys will all I can tie the knots because I am very dexterous Great there you go I'm light footed so I can go out into the bog And attach it to the trees and stuff 2d6 plus however many bonds you have 13 Dang So you're going to get a plus one to this You'll get a plus one to your defy danger strength Okay Nice so Billy's just like tying sick ass knots and stuff Oh yeah Did you roll your defy I haven't rolled Okay yeah so roll your defy danger strength 2d6 plus your strength 4 plus 2 is 6 Plus an extra 2 is 8 Yeah great alright so That's a 7 to 9 So you'll be able to Mostly move the log You'll be able to move it enough That the horse can get through But you won't be able to get the whole Cart through What proportion of the cart do we get through It's like half It's like The horse can get past Without getting stuck in the mud But Dan would probably have to leave Some of his supplies behind if he wants to get the cart through At all Oh Okay well I'm fine with that We have to do this Dan are you okay with it Oh jeez guys I don't know Let me I got a lot of good meat in here and I just I don't know what to leave Leave them Why don't we go to the festival and see if we can get Some people to come back and move the log Well just tell us what's in the What's in the cart that is the heaviest And the thing that people hate The most It's true Pickled egg Probably like the sweet schloss meat It's like sweet But it's still like savory But like not in a complimentary way Like a mince meat Like a mince meat A mince schloss meat How much of that did you bring Like 200 pounds Yeah leave that I don't know guys I don't think I wanna I don't think I'm comfortable to leave Anything behind You're gonna have to find another way I guarantee you that if you leave That barrel of shitty sweet meat In the middle of this bog For a hundred years no one would take it So it sounds like you're trying to parlay To convince Dan to leave his shit behind Oh yes So what is the leverage that you have on Dan The horse If you're trying to convince him We're gonna help him Or we can walk and he can carry all of his shit Stuff Why don't we just take him to the bar And he can take his horse with us If he doesn't wanna leave his gross meat Alright yeah We already have his horse Somebody roll 2d6 plus charisma The leverage is like We'll just leave you here in the swamp I have plus one charisma That's you You're the most And you got good rolls We'll see about that It's still good Nine So on a seven to nine They'll do what you want But they need concrete assurance Of your They'll need concrete assurance Of your promise Right now And your promise is that you'll continue to protect him I guess Oh yeah for sure We'll get him to the thing Okay great So um Dan that's the Fuck That's the whole fucking point Of this So Dan says Okay fine whatever But uh If I'm gonna leave this stuff behind I need you guys to cover the cost How much is this shit worth I was gonna I was probably gonna make You know 30, 40, 50 coins No one was gonna buy this You don't know You don't know that You haven't been to this festival before How long have you been lugging this around for I've been lugging this around For six months Now I understand That that's a long time But I just haven't found the right market And the hot dog festival in Mudlark Is the right market for this And I'm gonna be taking a huge loss Okay I'll I'll tell you this If If you have a single person Ask you Yeah For sweet meat For sweet schloss meat I will give you I will give you This amulet With a picture of a horse in it Let me take a look at that amulet Here you go That's a pretty good Is this a horse That No that one is my mother The other is the horse Oh the mane The mane threw me off She has like a long Sort of mohawk-y Kind of deal Yes Why the long face I'm sorry It says alright You know what Is it a valuable amulet by the way Like is it made of valuable materials I It was left In my basket When I was a child I am asking you Sean O'Hara Is asking Abdulaziz Is the amulet made out of like Valuable stuff It is not made out of wood Or metal So he's like Alright sounds You know what It is made out of Nobody knows It's a It's Wait I'm It's forming It's made out I can picture it in my mind It's like It's almost like volcanic rock Or like It's almost like a load Instead of Like burnished Metallic material That is like Like copper Yeah No No no no Like grayish Gray Gray kind of Old fireworks Yeah Kind of like Like volcanic rock Sort of Or like A meteor rock It's Or It's He says You know what Fine Whatever Let me just finish Describing this To everyone I can see it I'm holding it It's gray It's shiny I like it Here is it back And if If somebody You know what No I'm gonna hold on to this Actually No you should give it No I'm gonna hold on to this And if somebody asks me about Schlossmeat This is mine I don't like that And he tucks it He tucks it into his shirt Let's go I don't like that disrespect What are you gonna do about it Kid I'm brewing An idea Jesus Dan You're turning into A real dickhead right now Yeah I don't understand How this is our problem Well because I You guys are gonna get paid For getting me to this room For this festival And you're acting like Real wieners We had an agreement I walked in the bog for you I got red mud on my shoes And I lifted a whole God damn tree Well great But let's just look Let's just get I'm sorry I'm sorry guys I'm sorry You take two steps back Dan Yeah okay Alright fine These are wolfs wade Look I'm sorry I'm stressed out The festival Is in like a day and a half I got a bunch of meat Got a lot of Things riding on this Okay I'm sorry Dan we all understand That you wanna Succeed At this festival Yeah it's important So that you can tell All of the other Food cart owners How awesome a time You had At this festival Well you know what Tim is acting like A real hot shot Back in town He thinks Griddle cakes Way of the future I'm trying to tell him No schloss meat Will be And will remain Always the most popular And I think that this festival Is a great way to tell Tim To take his hot cakes And shove them up The old behind Yes Okay Okay Well let's take everything That we can That's not too Bogged down Alright Load up his horse Dan you're carrying most of it I don't Okay fine Fine fine fine fine So he actually is able to Like dump out The sweet schloss meat Which makes like The cart like light enough On one side That it doesn't totally Get stuck in the mud So you can kinda Wiggle it around The cart Around the log And the horse gets through And you guys are on the road And Back ready to go Nice Alright hop in everybody Next stop Mudlark Yeah that's the end of The session for today We've been playing Dungeon World Role playing game By Adam Kobol And Sage LaTorah Based on Apocalypse World By D.

Vincent Baker My name is Sean O'Hara I've been the Game master Paul Oppers My dick turns into Multiple B's Jessica O'Hara I found a nice rock And Abdul Aziz It's almost like a Loden stone And our producer Wes Lord Thanks Wes And Goodbye And so ends the tale Of adventures three Who tried the best they can Though dumb and scared And lost they be For time's abreast In revelry And though our journey May be like a conclusion We will not leave you With a single word Without a resolution Return next week To hear some more Whilst you commute Or do your chores And for you I'd gladly Spout more