Episode 22 – Alas Poor Yorick

Uh if you like spout more no wait is this me or if you like Spout Lore and you want to hear more of it go to patreon.com Spout Lore and maybe if you give them enough money they'll release me and we can see each other again I've been in this bar for years save me gather around friends let me tell you a tale of three heroes noble and bold a brute a druid and a thief who is but nine years old you know them by name you know them by deed their quests are famously daring so here I sit singing to you an adventure that is worth sharing tucker's the brute he knows not his home he loves to sing and fight this is a dream a dream Hello, everybody.

And welcome to Spout Lore. I'm your game master, Sean O'Hara. And joining me as always playing Tacoma Dome, the barbarian, Abdul Aziz. Hi. What the fuck was that? Playing Ving, the half-elf druid, Paul Oppers. Hello. I'm playing Fat Billy, the half-league thief, Jessica Tai. Hi. Everybody's so sure. We're getting right into it. No wasted syllables. I'm using all up the syllables that you guys say. Can you just get to the point, Sean? Sean, we've been trying to end this show for six years.

Nine seasons. You guys are drawing it out, introducing more and more NPCs in there and fucking narrative plot points. Holy shit. We're on a boat again? When are we going to finish the hot dog festival? I've been trying to get back there since 2017. Get back the schloss me to death. Who poisoned Dan's schloss me? Why do I have all these wooden tokens if we're not going back to the festival? I would like to vote. We abandoned the current plot. And all the goals. Love it. And we go right back down.

To the hot dog festival. To figure this out. I wanted on record that I tried to get you guys to go back to Mudlark three years ago. Yeah. And you remove it. Back then, we did not want to. Yeah, because it was pre-pandemic. The world was different, Sean. Yeah. Hillary Rodham Clinton was president of the United States of America. When last we left our heroes, they were enjoying a trek ride in a cargo container full of dogs. Billy snuck up to the front.

And introduced a brand new NPC and friend in the form of Trev Driver. Cinnamon bro extraordinaire. Yep. Who also has… Sorry, Jessica's so tired, she's physically holding her eyelids open. And every time I look over, it freaks me out. Oh, is that what you're doing? She looks white now. Every time I look over, I'm like, who's this? My eyes are already huge. Jessica does have really big eyes. Just like that, Abdul. Abdul looks more white. Whoa. Nope. Never mind. I'm white. He looks less white.

Look at my eyes. Look at my white eyes. Give me your land. Give me your land. Give me your land and your culture. You look like those scary masks in the museum. Yeah. Yeah. The more you reveal just bare eyeballs, the more you look like that racist puppet that Jeff Dunham made. I'm Jeff Dunham's puppet. Trev Driver. Ice road trucker. Working on himself. Up and down. In a relationship. Cinnamon bro. A thing that he keeps suggesting is a real thing.

I think that this is a bit of a, like, there's a group of people that Oleg has inducted into the Cinnamon Guild. Might be. Might be. We learned some things about the greater goings on of the world. It was a real hangout in a truck with a new guy episode. It was nice. Yeah. So we learned about Trev and we learned about carbonated energy drinks, how those exist. We learned that there is a war brewing in the principalities. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

The current climate, basically the state of the world has provided an opportunity for one of the princeps to move on a neighboring territory. Fucking wicked. And also that there have been storms throughout the North and smaller communities have been getting hit pretty hard. And that Trev swears he saw a giant white Thunderbird emerge from the clouds one night while he was driving. Pretty cool. Oh, and as a result of the war, the frozen North has been upping production on military equipment.

We learned a bit about the war. We learned a bit about the North in that they are a seceded former territory of the kingdom of Kinos who isolated themselves and militarized. So cool. Arcanics we think might be a big deal here. Magical technology using leftover magical energy stored up in the frozen ice of the North. We got stopped at a checkpoint. Mm hmm. Billy saved the group by creating an illusion of everyone looking like a monster.

Like a big bag of beans that was shaped like Tuck, a Tuck shaped bag of beans. Yeah. One of the guys was like, that's the fattest bag of beans I've ever seen. Don't say it. Don't say it. Everybody covered my mouth. Yeah. And then as we sailed away, moving closer to sheer city, Ving was looking out the window at a copse of trees that they passed. Beautiful. An arrow soared through the air. Beautiful. Beautiful. Beautiful. Slammed into the wood just beneath the window. So sick. Drive faster.

That is where we find our heroes now. Driving faster? Yeah. What happened? Go. Okay. An arrow. And he pulls his wheel off the front and slams it down and it whips the reins on the dog part. And they all kick it into overdrive. Oh my God. So sick. What's going on? What's going on? I pulled the arrow out of the side of the door and show it to him. I look at it. I inspect the arrow, discern realities of the arrow. Yeah. Discern realities. 2d6 plus wisdom. Eight. Okay. So you get one question.

Who's really in control here? Okay. So who is really in control here? This arrow is fletched in a style that is very reminiscent of the Ranger King's Talon. Talon being? Talon being a unit in the Ranger Corps. Oh shit. Yeah. I have a whole thing for how the Ranger Corps works. Cool. Somebody roll Spout Lore so I can. Make this be useful. Seven. Yeah. So the smallest unit of the Ranger Corps is the Talon, which is comprised of six Rangers of more or less equal status.

A wing is composed of six Talons. And out of all of those wings, there are led by an individual Ranger called the first Talon. Cool. And then the next step is the flight, which is composed of six wings. And the leaders of those wings are usually Rangers of great renown. Six. Sick. Yeah. So the Ranger Kings, this arrow is fletched in a style that you remember being very reminiscent of the Rangers in your father's wing. Oh yeah. And the different wings are fletched in the feathers of that.

Like there's like Osprey. Yeah. Owl. So what's your father's style? What's the feather they use? Raven. Raven. Tight. Whoa. That's so thematically on point. Yes. With how like dark a countenance he has. Yeah. Death. Yeah. And the black wolf. Fucking sweet. Dude. Ravencore. So Talon wing flight. Yes. Cool. There are six total flights in the Ranger Corps and each is represented by an individual Ranger without formal rank.

They are technically part of the echelon structure, but are rarely forced to bicker for votes. When one of them speaks, the others listen. These figures are functionally legends, often very long lived and survivors of countless conflicts across hundreds of years. If my sleeves were rolled up, I would be showing you all of the goosebumps that I have. There's a ton of work to be done.

Uh yeah so one of those is the ranger king that's so cool and I think we decided that dathaniel's called the ranger king because he is a ranger as well as a noble yeah which is uncommon in the ranger corps I'm sure there are lots of princes that are rangers but your father is like yeah a noble noble and a high-ranking ranger yeah he's not the king of the rangers no there's a king among rangers exactly it's so cool that like dathaniel's rule is so unchallenged that he can fuck off and be a ranger for a while and come back and not have to worry about like wars of succession or whatever uh yeah so you're holding an arrow with raven feathers it's my father's arrow the raven I'm saying this just to the arrow and to tuck and to billy I look at the window can I see anything no can I see anything uh you can try yeah 2d6 plus wisdom for discern realities 10 what here is not what it appears to be cool uh so you are basic because this copse of trees that you were passing is long past you now but billy you like poke your head out the window to try and get a look at it be careful and um just the barest little glimmer through your bill noculars you see what looks to be like a bush at the base of a tree move away and disappear into the into the shadows and uh what should I be on the lookout for so you you turn back into the cabin and kind of tell everybody what you saw yeah and ving you would know that based on the fact that it was one shot and it hit where it hit whether or not this was your father directly it doesn't matter this is a message this arrow to you communicates everything it's we know you're here we know where you are we're watching you oh yeah because they could have killed us if they wanted to they don't miss that's the thing that's the thing they hit the truck where they hit the truck because that's where they wanted to hit it yeah so they wanted to let you know that they were close yeah yeah so not really even trying to hide then no no and neither are we I'm sitting in the front seat I'm not on the lam at all and tuck is sitting in the little bucket seat in the middle and in the second row yes because I lost roshamboa I'm just whistling shotgun the whole way there uh yeah so that's that's what you learn is that this was just a message so do I keep going or is there something you need to take care of absolutely don't stop okay not even for a little pee pee not even for a little pee pee not even but what if I have to take a little pee pee well we got all these empties yeah you piss into this can dude what do you usually do for pee pee I pee out the window while I'm driving I look check it out and he rolls down the window and he puts one hand on the wheel but then he like lifts his body up and like just hangs his crotch at the window wow throw one leg over the window yeah see check it out check it out there's pee going all over him yeah no I wasn't I mean you know I wasn't trying to pee my pants are still on I was just trying to show you how I did it but doing the movement actually just activated that in my body and now I'm peeing all over the place I hear you're trying to pee trevor I sit down to pee and I sometimes I shit a lot you know sometimes that happens to me too when I'm doing this it's just a biological impulse wait are you telling us that you shit your pants on a regular basis or that sometimes when you sit down to pee in a bathroom you accidentally shit yeah it's surprising you know you didn't answer you just said yes yes I I sit down and I surprise shit a lot man I get it though there's a wise person once told us every poo-poo time is pee-pee time but not every pee-pee time is poo-poo time you know what I mean damn that's deep yeah wow really makes you think about when you should be peeping and pooping ving's writing it down billy's looking over ving's shoulder while he writes it down and he is thinking hard about the don't even stop for a little pee-pee as you guys pass a another trek stop he's like we gotta keep going well here's the thing dude we got two groups on our ass now one is the coppers and then two is the fucking rangers maybe do you really want to get caught in the middle of that also you're totally unlicensed I don't need a license I'm freelance that means that I am untouchable by the laws of man and god I also thought the same thing too until tax time rolled around and I learned so much what what do you what billy you've paid taxes bill you've been paying the taxes have you not been paying the taxes I mean that's what perel told me the thing slides open yeah what's up have you been explaining to billy about taxes what's that maggie are you making billy do your taxes I gotta do there's a dog back here he needs my help bye he said if I didn't pay taxes I would go to jail I'm going in the back I go to the back who did you pay billy did you pay him yes I'm shaking him down slapping his shit I it was I thought it was funny at first I'm sorry and then I just I really need the cash how much money have you made off our kid I don't know a hundred hundred fifty coins he I think he's taking it from other people yeah he's a thief I don't want to go to jail and I don't know what I own taxes you're making him steal more I'm it what are you using the money for well I'm you know I'm buying us supplies and stuff you mean your hats um a hat is a supply and mustache is a supply silk scarf is for me but I deserve a little treat now and again it's gonna be hard to pay my taxes up here billy there's you don't have to pay taxes in the north what you guys are freelance you don't have to pay taxes up north I'm free I'm being lance or free I'm free lance billy looks wistfully out the window free from all his taxes freelancers are basically sovereign citizens that all follow the teachings of a guy named lance who is like I am not subject to any laws zing opens a bottle free free lancer uh I I here you go any hands over a bag how many coins are in there there's 150 coins yes I kept all my receipts and I would get returns through return scams that I was doing wait you didn't spend any of the money billy gave you no like I would keep the stuff but I would do like a little returns like I'd buy a hat and then I'd get the box and then I'd put a bunch of dirt in the box and say I don't want the hat anymore prel I'm really proud of you billy I'm so impressed you know what here you go and he takes the bag back from tuck and he gives it to billy no no it's your tax return I don't want it you're the new thief now and tuck starts a slow clap and prel puts his hands up oh guys come on come on and the dogs start howling because they don't know this what are you guys fucking doing back there to my dogs I can show you guys how to return scams if you want hell yeah fuck yes we spend the money on the dog and then we go to the rest of the trip learning about return scams there's a montage yeah with no audio as prel's pointing at a whiteboard that has like a box with a hat in it and a box with an x in it he's just got a piece of chalk on the wall of the of the chip yeah and you continue on at the end you learn all about how to scam a store out of uh their merchandise while still getting a return on an item and then at the end he's like so yeah if you go in and you look rich they're not gonna question it that's very good tuck that's what it is is rich people get to do whatever they want so you got to pretend to be a rich person sick yeah and then you hear trev in the front going like oh I think we're we're almost at the city guys oh sick so what do you want to what do you want to do here do you know anywhere that we can go or stay in the city is there is there an inn or uh something like that oh yeah I mean like sheer city's like uh it's like a for real city but do you know where we're secret because cinnamon bros and wanted posters yeah where people kind of won't ask questions about us or tell the cops about us uh-huh yeah uh yeah so he does know a place let's talk about it I kind of like it being a motor inn what's the proprietor's name is their cabin you know like how every truck has their own cabin but it's like you stayed in your cabin for weeks now stay in spencer's cabin or whatever it could be like an old building like ironwood or something oh yeah I like that yeah it could be an old bunker yep because it's such a military yeah so they built it out of ironwood to a stand like attack yeah there's like tons of fireplaces in the building to keep everyone warm oh yeah maybe that's why it's called a motor inn because there's an engine that runs at the center of it that makes that heats it up like it's an device uh-huh yeah why waste energy just heating when you can do other stuff with it totally yeah that's cool so these places where there are these old arcane engines deep in the city there's a lot of things working off these few city centers and so maybe shutting those down you can shut down sections of the city oh yeah so like neighborhoods will be built around one of these engines yeah these cool I like them being called hearts yeah yeah because you would build stuff there but you'd also like you would eat there you know or cook there or something like that yeah so it's an old military bunker but it's made out of ironwood and I think you know like attachments have been built onto it yeah you know to house um a few of the widziano's um a few widziano's um a few widziano's um a few widziano's um a few widziano's um a few like a smoke tent.

Maybe there's like a little like communal pool. Like a YMCA here basically. Yeah, sort of thing. You guys are staying at the YMCA. For truckers. But for truckers. Yeah, it's got everything. Yeah, so you pull in to this place. It's outside the city so like you don't have to go through another checkpoint basically. Oh, cool. But there are a lot of people milling about and you do see like a lot of guards just kind of around. It seems like something's going on. Okay. At least in the city.

Like the city is very busy right now. Like there are a bunch of other ice tracks that have pulled in. Cargo? Yeah, seems like it. And some people don't have their cargo containers anymore. Like looks like some people have dropped stuff off and are on their way back. What if it's attached to like a little like railroad system? Sort of like a small cargo railroad system so that you don't have to obviously bring the ships into the city. That's so sick. Like cargo trains that'll take.

Yeah, if it's your last stop you can unload. That makes so much sense. It would be cool if this train kind of like went all over the city. Yeah, it does. There are like passenger versions of it and then there's cargo trains that also like at this meeting of where like the docks are and then all the roads coming in from the north kind of meet this one central train station. That's so cool. That's sick. I like that a lot. When you said that I also thought gondolas.

If the city like existed on some kind of incline, it would make sense that there would. Maybe some of the docks down to the shipyards, there's a gondola off some cliff somewhere. I know old share when we talked about it for the first time, I think it was said that there's cliffs ice cliffs. Yeah. Yeah. So maybe it's like shelves like terraced spots. You know what I mean? So there's yeah, there's passenger trams and then also gondolas that go up to the higher parts.

A lot of people like the poor people, the people that use the trains as a non-sanctioned transportation. Oh yeah. Yeah. Right in the rails. Because you like if you're living on the outskirts, but you work at the you just take the cargo train. Yeah. Yeah. Great. So who what's who's the proprietor? Feels like a retiree kind of thing. I think it that ex-military orc. Yeah. I like that. Yep. An old orc. What do we call him? Yorick. Yorick. That's cool. Yorick's pretty good. Yorick's cabin.

I like that. Yeah. Yorick works. Cool. So are you guys staying here or are you just using this as a place to sneak into the city? I think our priority would be like try to find transportation further north. Yeah. Because we are ultimately heading to the glacier. Okay. Yeah. We don't need to be in sheer right now. No. We're just trying to get information about Natternack. And we are ultimately going to their tower, right? Yeah.

I think we just came to sheer city because that was like the closest we could get. That's where the truck was going. Yeah. So this is actually a good place to maybe pick up more transport. Yeah. Is there anyone going further north? Oh yeah. Probably. There's people going all over the place. Trekkers? Yeah. Can you introduce us to one? A trustworthy one? A cinnamon bro one? Cinnamon bro, eh? I'll see what I can find. You guys go get some grubs or something. I'll be right back.

Should we go into this Yorick's pub? Yeah. Yeah. So what does the inside of Yorick's look like? I think it's pretty dark. It's in the wood. Does it have like an old like country jukebox kind of music going on? Do we have a jukebox? At the trucker stop? I want to stay away from we just left the husky. Yeah. I don't think we have one. Oh yeah. I don't think this is the kind of place as like jovial as husky place. I'm thinking of like the prancing pony kind of. Yeah. Totally.

But behind the bar there's like an old orc. Maybe there's not a lot of people that he's like really like oh yes! Welcome! Like trying to make this shithole. So funny. Trying to sell us on staying here. Yeah. Okay. So there's an old orc behind. What is he? Is he trying to dress to impress? He's maybe got like a shitty little bow tie on. Sleeve garters? Sleeve garters. Oh he's got like those piratey linen shirts. Oh yeah. Totally. Everything's Oscar the Grouch did his whole like full. Oh yeah.

Yeah. Absolutely. And he's wearing this like wool scarf. Yeah totally. It's cold. It is cold. It's cold all over the place here. I like his wool scarf. You do? Welcome to your XR. Please come in. Come in. Thank you. Come in out of the cold. It's actually colder in here. Oh that's part of the charm at Yorick's. It hasn't been warm in here in 55 years. Do you have blankets? Do I ever? And he rushes off to the back and he comes back with an armful. Do I ever? Do I ever? Slam slam. Bang bang bang.

Clang clang. Behold here your finest blankets this side of something else. And he throws out blankets to everybody. Thank you. Thank you. Maggie and Perel in the back. They're also here. Here's all your blankets. Now what can I? And he starts shining the bar. What can I do for you? The rag is dirtier. It's making the bar dirty. Do you have like a hot soup? I got a cold soup. It's good for the bones. Keeps the joints stiff. Yeah. Stiff? I think I do need a bit of more stiffness in my body.

So let's do that. Yeah you don't want your joints too loose. That's how your joints get old and loose. There you go. And he slops out an ice cold bowl of stew. That he pushes across to Billy. And then he scoops a bunch of ice cubes. It was hot to start. He cools it down. Thank you. Make sure to let those melt first. Okay. Okay. He's trying to melt the ice cubes. No no no no no. Don't blow on them. It's too hot. Do you have a menu? Uh well. Menu's up here. He points to his head. Okay.

There's only menu Yorick needs right here. Okay. Do you have like eggs? No. Do you have any greens? No. Browns? It depends on what kind of brown you're talking about. Do you have gravy? No. Toast? No. Dog food? Yes. That's for the dogs though. Do you have bread of any kind? No. Do you have cheese? No. Do you have like a meat? No. Do you have cold stew? Yes. There we go. Cold stew. I think I know what he has. Okay. We'll have some of the cold stew. Four cold stews coming right up.

Cold stew gives me hiccups. Slides it across the bar. Puts the ice cubes in each of them. Make sure your mother does melt. Okay. Don't touch it. Let it melt. Okay. It's part of the tradition of the meal. You let the meal cool itself. Okay. Yeah. Sounds good. And then Tuck's like oh what kind of alcohols do you have? Because he wants to distract him away so he can get some of these fucking ice cubes out of the stew. You trying to distract me away from the ice cubes son? No dude.

I am interested in those interesting bottles behind you. Well in that case. He turns around. Okay. 2d6 plus what to get him. Dexterity. To fish these out. Dexterity. Dexterity I guess. Yeah. Seven. Seven. So he comes back around. This is a bottle of old blue. Old blue what? Alcohol. Alcohol. And because you as you know in the hospitality. Of your ex since you asked me to get this bottle you got to pay for it. What what five courts he points to the door. There's a sign clearly there.

Management reserves the right to make you pay for bottles of alcohol you ask about or look at in parentheses. I think I know why a lot of people aren't in here. We're the only people in here. You are. It's then that you look back and the tables are like dusty. Can I Spout Lore slash have an idea about this old old blue. Yeah totally. Yeah. Okay. Is it like glacier water that they've made into alcohol it's sort of like an absinthe where it's like because got a little bit of magic in it.

It makes you like hallucinate a bit if you drink a lot. I like that. I love that. Sweet. Magic alcohol. Yeah. What's it taste like? Is it just water that is somehow alcoholic or is it because it has magic in it it feels like it's alcohol. I think it passes by some sort of route. It's like the distillment of when the glaciers melt in the runoff but really early runoff and it goes by. Yeah they harvest these roots and they ferment it like you know.

I was going to say licorice root because of absinthe but it doesn't have to be. Oh could be. No that's cool. Yeah. It tastes like licorice but also like you're licking a battery. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. So that's that's the story old blue and now that I'm talking about it it's fancier than that so it's 10 coins. Fuck. You're it. What? I have to make sure I'm accurately pricing my goods young boy.

I understand that you haven't been pricing a lot of goods because it doesn't look like you've had a lot of business in quite some time. Well Yorick says a bit of a discerning clientele if you know what I mean. I just haven't any old wonder about coming through my doors. He's shining us on and I like it. Okay fine. Who has the money then? Perel. You've got the money. I thought this was my money. I know it is but now yours is ours and what's ours is ours. Okay whatever. Here you go.

Maybe he can return the bottle. Get his 10 coins back and Yorick scoops it off the table into his apron. Does Yorick walk away? No I'm standing right here. Well we have to have a conversation now. Carry on. And he crosses his arms. Ving flips him a coin. Thank you. This is for It's not that kind of place son. Wait do you watch us talk? I don't have to. Alright fine. Come to New York's place for all his finest stuff. I don't even get to listen to your conversation. He goes into the back room.

That's maybe one of the least personable innkeepers I've ever met in my entire life. And you hear him start slamming down pots like he's really embarrassed. Ving is everyone like this up here? As far as I remember all innkeepers are incredibly cold and poor and pushy. That sucks. He hasn't been to many inns though. Keep that in mind. Right you were a prince. This is my first inn. But you want to impress us. Yeah exactly. You know I don't know I thought he was kind of cool.

It's a nice little energy that he brought you know. Sometimes it's nice to just tell a customer to fuck off you know. It worked for you. It sure did. It sure did. Okay what did you guys want to talk about? I don't know. Well I want to talk about what we're doing next but also I had an idea which is rare. Are you okay? Yeah no. She had a concussion? Okay I'm sorry. He thought so hard he gave him a second concussion. I'm fine. I'll be fine. I just can't sleep for the next few hours.

But for real though he points at the blue alcohol and he points at Perel and he's like do you think if you drink this whole thing you will get your magic back? I didn't say it was a good idea. I just said it was an idea. But I'm looking at Perel like do you think? Well I mean it's definitely an idea. Chug. Chug. Chug. Chug. Chug. Chug. Chug. Chug. Chug. Chug. Chug. Chug. Chug. Chug. Chug. He's like slowly peeking back around the door. Okay here we go. Chug. Chug. Chug. Chug.

He starts chugging it and he coughs it up. Oh it's so intense. It tastes like rummy alcohol. Can this be my spell lord? Uh yeah sure. To see if like this alcohol will make Perel magic again? For a moment? Or even yeah give him a little bit of it because if he's drinking it. He's drunk? Yeah. 2d6 plus intelligence. Ooh.

Everybody pray that this is a 12 because we might have a way to get Perel a little bit of magic back every once in a while while also making him drunk which would be so funny and useful. Please. Please. Eight. Eight. Minus one is fucking. Seven. Seven. Oh man. Okay. It's okay. Uh so. Interesting. Yeah interesting but not useful. Did we talk about the like the candle thing that he was doing? The like burning the candle and like meditating in front of it? Did we talk about what he was doing?

Not really. He just said that it didn't work. Yeah so I'm thinking maybe that thing that he was trying to do would work now a little bit. Oh cool. When he's drunk he can use his ion candle. When he's drunk he can perform the boundless thought principle. And what is that again? It's he's basically folding his brain into different instances so he can think about multiple things at once fully. That's so cool Sean. So he drinks all of this alcohol over the course of a few minutes.

Cause he's a bitch. He's a lightweight for sure. I imagine it's like a wine bottle though. Yeah totally. Yeah. Yeah it's big. Okay. It's like a 750 mil of blue cacao. So I think I've got about six or seven minutes before this gets really fucked up. Hey Eric. Yeah. Could we get a room? Alright yo. Um uh yeah. Give me five minutes. Fifty bucks for the one you're in now. And he runs off like through the bar like through the empty darkened tables just to the other side of the room.

He's holding a hammer and a band saw close it off. We don't know what it's for. You might have been using it to cook. He might be using it to open the sounds like he's chasing a chicken possibly to pluck it for maybe a pillow and uh yeah five minutes later. Come on. Yeah, come on. You got a room for you and he's kind of like tottering a little bit because his joints are so stiff. I pick up Perel like a baby because he can't stand Hey, thank you so much for this. Yeah, no problem, buddy.

Thanks for drinking all that alcohol for gonna be so sick. So soon hold it in man. Just hold it in for a little, you know, if you hold your thumb in your hand, you don't gag. He puts both of both his thumbs in his hands and he goes gags right away. He's like I can't I can't do that and uh York takes you to a room that looks like what it looks like it had been a boarded up.

He forgot to take down the like a city and like notice of like closure health risk and he's like pulling sheets off furniture and like off of this is our finest room and there's a mirror on the ceiling the bench shaped like a heart. What's this room called? This is called the mirror over the bedroom. Wow. Very elegant. It is. It's an old um orcish custom where it's good for your spirit to see your bodies having a restful sleep. No way. And for looking at your lover's bums and missionary.

I would know because I'm an orc and that is orcish custom. Wait a second. I am an orc for sure. That much is guaranteed. Have a good night. Oh, by the way, 50 coins. 50 coins. Okay, 20 coins. 20 coins. No, that's not how this works. 15. 15 deal. 5. Wait. Yes. No. 8? No. 11. Okay. Stop. Stop. Stop. Stop saying words. Just give him 14 coins. I'm throwing 10 coins out the hallway. He's running after them. Slam the door locket. There's no lock. The lock is Billy sits in front of the door.

I go to slam the door and it just goes all the way open. Like a saloon door. Yeah, and Perel flops down on the bed and he goes I'm feeling something for sure. I think I'm a wizard again. He stands up and he stands up to his full height and he stretches his arms in the air and he's stretched too far forward and he starts to tip over. Okay. All right. I'm not a wizard anymore or any. I'm not magic, but I think and then his eyes open.

And they like look into the middle distance and he you just hear him say, Oh my God. What? What? I can see it. What? What? I can see it all. What? And he drops down into a sitting position crossing his legs, puts his hands on his knees and closes his eyes. Perel? I'm so fucking drunk right now. Do you have the ion candle? Should we take out the ion candle? Give me the candle. Light it. Give me my candle right now. I'm trying. This thing's out of focus. It's a fucking fuel. It's a candle.

It doesn't have fuel, you dumb fuck. Can you light this? Yes. I gotta use my elemental master. Guys, I'm gonna boss share piss in three minutes. Perel, you gotta hold it in. You gotta hold it in for us. I'm gonna fucking triple right now. All my holes are gonna be on full alert. You gotta close those holes, Perel. Close those holes, buddy. If I was a wizard, I could close these holes so perfectly. You are a wizard. You are a wizard. I am a wizard.

Yeah, all that shit and piss and puke has magic in it. I'm running out of time. You gotta light that candle. Okay, I'm gonna elemental mastery this candle. You're gonna what? What? I'm trying to start a fire. Two dicks plus constitution. So, I got eight. Uh-huh. Affect the desire comes to pass. So, I won't retain control. Uh-huh. Or avoid paying nature's price. This might just mean that you burned the candle really fast. No. No, we can't lose this candle.

Unless, I mean, he doesn't have much time left. Anyway, I can see his cheeks are all puffing up. Flare the shit out of it to see if it, like, really gives him some juice. Who knows? Let's do it. Let's do it. And you pay nature's price. I pay nature's price. So, you set the candle down. The flame is guttering. Yeah. Doing this, rubbing my hands with the wick in between my palms. And, woof. And it burns hard. And Perel breathes in. Deeply. And hiccups. And breathes out.

And you can see his eyes fluttering like he's in REM sleep. Like his pupils are moving so wildly behind his eyes. He's sitting there for like 45 seconds, basically. And the flame on the candle flares up. Uh-oh. And suddenly winks out. And Perel opens his eyes and goes, I know how to get my magic back. Whoa. What? What? And he passes out. Oh, no. Oh, no. Oh, no. It's okay. It's okay. Is he still breathing? Yeah. Tuck puts his nose in Perel's mouth. Is there air coming out?

I didn't know you were a paramedic. And he's like, yeah, he's breathing. Okay. Nice. Smells like a burning cigarette factory in there. Yeah. And Maggie grabs Perel under the armpits and throws him up on the bed. Uh-huh. And goes, what the fuck was that? What happened? I put him in the recovery room. Reposition just in case. Yeah. That's a good idea. He's definitely gonna barf piss and shit. Yeah. So, I mean, I'm gonna stay here with Perel and make sure he doesn't fucking eat his tongue.

But what's next? What are you guys gonna do? And Ving, as she's speaking, you start blinking a lot and you feel kind of lightheaded. Then your vision clouds. No. What? And you see clouds whipping past you. You feel just a heart hammering thundering, per se, in your chest. You know, beyond a shadow of a doubt, it's behind you. Your life is a hair's breadth away from being taken from you. Oh my god.

And you burst through the cloud cover and you see in the distance a city glittering on the shores of an arctic sea. And then you're back on your knees on the ground. I run outside. Oh, yeah. I follow. Billy follows. Yeah, so you run out and the moment you exit, the door of Yorick's far, far in the distance, you see a dark shape duck down out of the cloud cover. And coming out of the clouds behind him is a powerful-looking, large, bone-white thunderbird. Whoa.

Cloudpiercer's being pursued by Thronebreaker for whatever reason. And you can feel that Cloudpiercer knows that you're there and that you can see him, but he also knows that if he gets any closer, he's drawing Thronebreaker too close to you. But people in the crowd, like people outside this place, start looking up and calling out as they see these two massive birds coming out of the clouds. It's like when, in movies, when like… Like a meteor? Yeah, meteors.

People are like, what the fuck is going on? Slow screaming? Yeah. Oh, and there's that sound as they're flying just under the clouds. You can hear the thunder. They're like cracking? Yeah, as they're flying so fast, it sounds like they're breaking the sound barrier, basically. So cool. There's huge cracks and peels of thunder over you. Lightning starts building in the clouds, but Cloudpiercer pulls up back into the clouds. Looks like he's drawing Thronebreaker away. Oh my god, he needs our help.

I need to get up there. I want to use elemental form to transmute my body into a form made from the raw elements and I want to get up there. Okay, so you're going to take an elemental form. Yep. So a form of moonlight. What form are you taking? I'm on my knees, just gathering all this snow and permafrost. Grit and frozen earth around me and just lifting it up like a sheet. Like the first top thick first foot of hard packed snow and ice and rocks and grit.

And then jump up and kind of splay my hands out the side. They shoot out into wings. I want to make a giant thunderbird. Wow. Out of ice and stone. Yeah, fucking cool. Get up into the sky. That's so sick. I imagine when the rocks and the permafrost is floating around you, you're kind of like stepping on it like stairs to get into it. Oh, I like that a lot. Like strapping into the mech. Yeah. This thing walking up to it.

Wing, wing, either arm and the top of the bird is all white because it's snow and then it goes into clear and then black on the bottom because of all the rock and everything. Well, let's roll it. Let's hope you do it. Okay, I really hope I do. 2d6 plus wisdom. Alright, constitution for elemental form. Elemental form. Eight. Okay, eight. Perfect. So I get to hold. Yes.

And you take this form of this majestic powerful sinister near almost looking bird of stone and permafrost and take off into the sky. Not yet. I can't do this alone. And Tuck is like, I got you, buddy. And then he like whips the battle axe off his back and then he tosses his backpack to a random person in the crowd. And then I run up to that person. I'm like, give me that. And then he, yeah, he jumps on your back and I make a little saddle for him. Oh, yeah. No saddle. Perfect.

Is Billy going up with him? Billy? Am I invited? I mean, I don't want to put you in harm's way, but I could really use you. I know how powerful you are. I'm on. I have got Tuck's backpack on too. Nice. This massive backpack on this little boy. I know he has a tiny backpack, but it's still as big as Billy. Yeah. This is basically the magic school bus heading out. You're all strapped in. Please let this be a normal field trip with the frizz. No way. What? Fly up into the sky.

And that's, we're flying. We're soaring into the air. Powerful wing beats. And my kimono gets ripped off. I forgot you were wearing a kimono. You finally lost the kimono. It's been episodes. So many episodes. Someone in the crowd, it lands in their face and they're like, ooh. What's that powerful masculine musk? Smells weird. And super masculine. Also, any semblance of secrecy that we had in the town just gone. Anyway, you're now powering through the skies above Sheer City.

The wind is like knives on our faces. Yeah. Tuck's put on his glasses to protect against the wind a little bit. And yeah, the clouds are coming. Okay. Going towards it. Getting in there. I want to follow this trail. Can I close my eyes? Can I try and see what he sees? Yeah, you close your eyes for a moment inside your ice and permafrost bird mech. And I can see the screaming beak of Thronebreaker. Thronebreaker, yeah. Cloudpiercer's turned around and is like swiping and pecking and biting.

It scares the shit out of me. Yeah. It's terrifying. And you come through the cloud cover into the realm above the clouds. This is the domain of Thronebreaker. Towering mountains of cloud above you. No earth to be seen below. Brilliant blue skies above. And pandemonium. So many? Dozens of thunderbirds. All locked in battle. Some sort of war that's been taking place above the clouds this whole time. That no one has been privy to. Holy shit. What's going on?

Great torrents of wind and lightning and huge peals of thunder as if the very elements themselves, the sky itself is rending under the power of their fury. Fucking metal, dude. He lifts his axe up. Yeah. As this bolt of lightning comes down behind you. Yes, Billy looks like he's dressed in like a fur bikini for some reason. And Tuck is like, fans, somebody draw this. What's that guy's name? We did all the crazy. Yeah. Yeah. This fucking rules.

And you see Cloudpiercer and Thronebreaker off in the distance locked in battle. Cloudpiercer is definitely trying to get away. Thronebreaker is a massive specimen. Though Cloudpiercer, you notice, is much larger than the last time you saw him. But between you and them are battling thunderbirds. I want to go up high. Instead of going in, I'm going to go way, way up high. Hold on. Are you going to use one of your hold or are you going to fly? I'm going to fly. Okay. 2d6 plus strength. Six.

Oh, can I aid? Yes. Thank you. How are you aiding? I am working as like a conduit for all that spiritual energy. Right. Yeah. Ten. Oh, fuck yeah. Cool. You start flying up this kind of slope of dark gray thundercloud. Billy on the back acting like a little backup battery. Yeah, actually, how I do this is I talk in like fairy language to the element. You start talking in tongues. Yeah, like very quietly. So sick.

And Billy has to lash out with his voice and admonish a spirit as like you see a powerful like claw emerged from the thundercloud like made of cloud and lightning. Whoa. And it swipes at Ving, but Billy like castigates it like in the fairy language and it recedes. So cool. And this episode took a turn. Yeah, it did. Here I thought, we're just going to go to like Valley Village. I know I wanted. I want to fancy so bad. No, this is great.

Actually, we cut back to like the Valley Village that we would have gone to and you just hear young and loose and lovely and people are just like wheeling your car but in the window at the back, you could see tumbling men made of ice and fire. Someone looks at a tag on a button down shirt and is like 50 bucks. This is the worst day of my life. The imp from girl from girl. There's so many different versions of this song that we've done on this show.

And yeah, you carry up along this towering slope of storm cloud rising above spiraling, spiraling a pair of Thunderbirds locked their talons locked blood and feathers streaming as they spiral down towards the cloud cover. Tuck it. Tuck his leaned in to Ving like as close as he can because the wind is like ripping me off. That's really good. Wind is what ripping me off. It really did sound. What did I say? It sounds really sexual. It's so funny, but we made a sexual. I know I can't help it.

The wind is fucking ripping me off. I'm ripped so tight and I'm pressed into Ving's back. I'm pressed into Ving and I'm getting ripped off hard and you crest the top of this cloud. Great. And now I want to like tuck in. Hold on. I have an idea and make ourselves a missile to go for now using the gravity and like, but yes, are you using a hold? Are you rolling? I'm going to use one of the hold. Yeah, you spend when you're hold. You've got it.

And what is your goal with this to hit thrown threat thrown breaker Thrasher. You named him thrown breaker. I want you to know that renamed him. Yeah. Yeah. Okay. Roll your damage. Two. So you tuck in your wings. Yeah. And do a spiral down. Yeah. And just shoot. Tuck and Billy are barely holding on. I want that. So either you can stay locked in this fight for as long as you want, or this could be an opportunity for you to basically tackle cloud piercer out of the fight.

That's what I was initially trying to do is tackle him out of the fight. So you spiral down like a rocket. Yeah. And you slam into a throne breaker and cloud piercer is able to remove himself from these claws and begins like soaring around in a circle and he calls down to you like no, what are you doing? I'm taking him down. I'm saving you. I also want to know what's going on. Yeah, me too. That claw. Yeah. Spirit claw spirit cloud claw. Yeah.

Is it the Thunderbirds and something else or is it the Thunderbirds fighting each other plus something else like I want to know should we just ask cloud piercer? I mean if you were to leave the battle and take some time to ask some questions, no time to ask question while I'm on things back. Who are you asking the question to the spirits? Can I do that? Well, you sold me on it. So yes, you can. So certain realities, I guess nine aid how I'm giving you repose.

I'm giving you a moment calm moment after we smash into him and then backing off and floating back to calm down and I'm following cloud piercer back as their own breakers reeling. Yeah, perfect. Okay, so two to six plus bond. Nice 11. Okay, so you get three questions off the list. Who who's really in control here? So you I'm asking the spirits. Yes, which spirit the storm doesn't matter.

There's one spirit here that is overpowering the rest by a long shot and it is a spirit that you are familiar with. This is a force a malice that you have felt before the storm. I the storm the storm is alive. They're trying to battle the storm. Oh shit Steve Graves storm that followed us it being released it. Okay, so so it's Lillian storm is what's in control here. Yeah, pretty much. So so that's grief while Lillian. So Lillian storm is a complicated thing.

Yeah, it's not just a manifestation of Lillian grief Lillian being the goddess of the moon. It was more something that cropped up around her grief and anger. Okay, and you feel that like rage and that anger but also the fury of like an unleashed animal. Okay. Yeah. How about this? What here is not what it appears to be between cloud piercer and throne breaker.

Yeah, so you're connecting with the feeling of this storm hearing and feeling the rage in the air and you feel that echoed in a large number of the Thunderbirds that are fighting but you feel the opposite from the others like you're you get the idea that one group of these Thunderbirds are fighting. With the storm and the others are fighting against it. Thronebreaker seems to be one of the birds fighting with the storm while cloud piercer is fighting against it.

So there's a faction of Thunderbirds that are who's like God is the storm. Yeah, like the storm you can feel whipping up around Thronebreaker as this like massive force. He's like the winds are buffeting every time he flaps his wings. I wonder if the storm is clouded his mind. Sounds like it.

What here is useful or valuable to me for whatever reason it seems like Thronebreaker is really focusing on cloud piercer like every time cloud piercer gets a little bit further away and begins to escape Thronebreaker breaks off of the fight and chases after him. It seems like cloud piercer is trying to distract and draw him away. Keep him occupied. Basically well piercers missing like feathers that don't grow back like there's yeah, you know what I can hold like battle scarred for sure.

Yeah, we're here to help. How can we help? Yeah, he says like follow me into the clouds and he just starts to fly away and goes for one of the like big pillars that doesn't look like it's full of horrible storm energy, but Thronebreaker immediately begins to like turn and give chase. He's much larger and it's harder for him to maneuver as quickly. Yeah, but yeah, cloud piercer begins to fly away. Oh, can I attack Stormbreaker? Yeah, absolutely. All right.

I want to turn around and jump off things. Back and at Stormbreaker with the axe. I want you to understand the stakes. I hope you do. Yeah, I guess again. We're going to slow motion lightning feeding behind you as you're jumping from the back of one Thunderbird into the face of another looks cool, which is honestly most of Tuck's motivation. This is going to be my album cover. So maybe that's what he screams. This is the cover.

I think as Bing is like turning to follow cloud piercer talk, you look behind and you realize he's not going to be able to get far enough before Thronebreaker attacks him. Yeah, Thronebreaker is fucking gaining on us and I can see the bees or like charging up kind of it feels like he's dragging an entire storm in his wake. So Tuck turns to Billy and he's like, all right, Billy, you hold on no matter what happens. Okay. Okay. And he's like, all right, here we go.

He's supposed to take CLC on his back and he jumps and that's seven, but I have three strengths. So it's strong boy. So hack and slash. The benefit is that Thronebreaker is coming right towards you. Yeah. So yeah, 2d6 plus strength for hack and slash man. This looks so this looks so cool. Yeah. Remember me. Remember me. Yeah. He meant to say remember this, but he said me. It really sounds like he's about to die. Well, he knows. He's not going to die because there's no trees up here.

All of a sudden, a tornado tree on fire. It found me. Okay, here we go. 2d6 plus strength for the attack. Hack and slash. Okay. Seven plus three is ten. Damn it. Wow. Jesus Christ. Okay. Here is a rule that I have always forgotten about until one of my Patreon groups reminded me of it while we were playing. So thanks to Patrick. A show Kevin and Andrew on a ten plus you deal your damage to the enemy and avoid their attack at your option.

You may choose to do an additional 1d6 but expose yourself to their attack. Oh, yes, I will do that. And the reason why he can do two damage is because he's got the axe in one hand as he's jumping. He pulls the waning knife out from behind his back. And it's a light with Lillian's light. I was gonna say do you think it's so bright right now? Yes, the clouds around are glowing. Oh my God. It's bright and purple. Yes, because we're in Lillian's storm. So it's charged up.

And the amethyst is glowing. Yeah. Okay. So lightning strikes the waning knife. Fucking waning knife. Yeah. It's a charge. I am using the power of their storm against them. Guys, this is so cool. It's so cool. It's been so long. I can't stand it. I can't stand it. It's like dead. Sabotage. Guys, we haven't rolled the damage yet. I'm so sorry. It's gonna be. It's charging up the dice. Yeah, let's charge them up with our powers. Yeah, let's roll with our powers of imagination.

Yeah, I am thousands of feet in the air. Yeah, waning knife in one hand, axe in the other purple light on the left and white light on the right as if I am both demon and angel coming for the king of all thunderbirds and the queen of the sky herself. The moon is so cool monologue flying through the air. Famous to himself. Just roll your damage man, please. Oh, my lord. And then the additional six. Yes. What? So ten damage. Ten damage. Ten damage is not nothing.

And if it wasn't for everything that you'd set up, I don't know that this would have done a huge amount of damage because he's a very tough bird. So you leap into the air feeling the presence of your family recede behind you, but knowing that you're traveling forward to protect their lives and you see this colossal thunderbird head as big as a fucking school bus. You know what I mean? Like massive animal.

And I am having second thoughts because I could not tell how big he was because of perspective. Really? Yeah, exactly. And also because of the glasses, they fuck with my depth perception. It looks so cool, but you look like such a nerd at the same time. Oh, yeah. And you leap forward. This bird coursing through the air towards you, shining waning knife in one hand, glowing axe in the other. You stab the knife into the side of Thronebreaker's head. Yes.

Bring the axe back and connect with the magical gem, the bezoar, the precious stone in the middle of his forehead. Yes. And it shatters under the power of the axe. Oh my God. Releasing a massive thunderclap and a force that is powerful enough to blow you off of his head. And then Tuck goes, I got blown off! Jesus Christ. And that is when you're going to roll 2d12. Oh, shit. So you're going to roll two of these and take the highest. Can I activate defend as well?

Because I'm acting in defense of my friends. This is more of a balls-out attack than it is a defense. And they were out, my friend. They're always out. Flapping hard. All right. Fair enough. Here we go. Both of them are eight. Both of them are eight. Which feels like fate. So you take eight damage. Eight. Yeah. Okay. That's not bad. That's a lot. That's not bad. Don't forget, I have two armor. Oh, man. No. No, say it.

I mean, it's always, I always love the idea of someone getting like a cool-ass scar from a fight. I kind of love the idea that much like his dark reflection in McCall, Tuck loses an eye. Whoa, like Fatum? But that might be too much. I think that's too much. Yeah. Yeah. What about like a crazy scar that like gives you like… Like the lightning scars that people get when they're… Oh, that's cool. That, I like that. Lightning.

And it's actually, it's connecting up the coin pieces that are in my chest. Oh, that's kind of sick. That's pretty cool. Yeah. Okay. So you feel, yeah, this electricity arcing through your body as the gem explodes. And I don't take the full damage because I have divine protection. And it's because like TLC are like filtering as much of the lightning out of me as they can. Well, you've got that lightning rod, of Rian. Yes. Also that. The lightning knife. Yeah. Yeah.

And it actually like it goes through the tree tattoo on my arm too. Like where it's like these like arcing burns are connected like from the coin shards to the tree tattoo. And Ving, you're tossed back a little bit with the force of this bezoar bursting. Like it's a shockwave around Thronebreaker. Who is notably not dead. Yes. But he like falls for what feels like a long time. Like that slow turn. Yeah. And then like dips below like begins to dip below the cloud cover.

We're both falling in parallel. Yeah. And you see an eye open. A fucking massive eye. How big is he? Is he like the size of an elephant? Isn't he like the size of a house we said? His head is the size. He's like a quarter mile long. Oh, that's intense. Yeah. He's really, really big. It's like I'm I fought a dragon. It's like I jumped out. I thought I was going to fight an albatross and I and then I got to him and I was like, this is a dragon. Yeah.

And he so he like his massive eye opens as you're falling. Tuck is falling by the way. I bolt for him. Yeah. And Tuck you see his eye open and kind of focus on you in that weird sideways like bird way, but he begins to write himself and as he dips below the clouds you see him flee. Ving. Yep. I'm in Paragon Falcon freefall wings tucked heading for for Tuck. Are you rolling for this? Yeah, I'm going to roll for strength. I guess or dexterity dexterity dexterity. Okay. Flap flap flap flap.

Nice 10 10. Perfect. Yeah. Yeah, you rock it towards Tuck. I'm like dodging shards of bees or grab one of them. Yeah. Oh, I think like maybe like the electricity and the power in them. There's like a field of shattered bees or like hanging in the air. Oh, yeah. Electricity arcing off of them. Oh my God. He's our shard. And yeah, you is Tuck. You're trying to let Tuck land on your back. You're trying to grab him. Yeah, I just like scoop him down underneath. Bam. Grab him and head down. Yeah.

Tuck slams into your back with the force of a thousand suns. Absolutely crushing Billy. Billy, are you okay? Fine. Okay. Cloud pieces to me right here Ving and he's like right next to you formed up off your wing. Okay, cool. And then I dig Billy out from under my belly. I am flat like a cartoon. Yeah. It's a blow into his thumb to pump himself back up. Are we safe? For now, that was no small blow that you struck Thronebreaker. He'll need to recover. Yeah, man. I blew that guy off so hard.

I warrior. You did blow him off. And then I I'm riding Ving like a knight. Yeah. There's like blood on me and stuff. It's a knight who has recently returned from battle. And then I find my head to him and I go, it is good to see you cloud piercer and you Tacoma and you young Billy. Why thank you. It is also an honor to be in your presence again. Quite now, please retreat. We must away. I know a place where we can take refuge amongst the peaks of the mountains. Oh, wow.

Yeah, the clouds will shield us. Cool. I turned to talk. I'm like, are you actually okay? And he leans into Billy and he's like, I think I think I got electrocuted pretty bad. I don't want to alarm you, but like, yeah, definitely. I'm seeing a lot of weird marks and scars on your body that weren't there before. I'm like, does it look cool? It looks so cool. I'm really jealous that you got to be the one to get those scars. Thanks. Do you think Allison will like it if we run into her?

No reason why I'm asking that specifically. I think she always likes running into you. Cool. Thanks. That's great. What an offhander. End question. Do you think we'll run into her again soon? I hope so. Yeah. Guys, stop looking at me when you say that. And Cloudpiercer leads you like above the clouds through the cover at one point. Like it looks like he's trying to kind of cover his tracks. Is there a team of Thunderbirds of his friends following us? Yeah.

Every once in a while, they'll form up, but like they try to not get too close together for too long. Cool. And it looks like because it looks like they're definitely trying to get somewhere without the other birds. Knowing where they're going. It would be cool if they intentionally go through like rainstorms to cover their scent. Yeah. So you're all soaked to the bone. Oh, yeah.

But eventually you arrive at it's like you're in the clouds and then very suddenly there is the face of a mountain in front of you. Holy shit. And Cloudpiercer alights on a cliff takes his place and goes here. Here we can rest amongst the peaks of the mountain. Is it just ice or is there any like nests or anything here? There's like, yeah, there's some nests that look like they're made out of, you know, fucking trees and shit like really big nests. Holy. Is this where you sleep, Cloudpiercer?

When there is time, the battle rages on. How long is the battle been going on? What are you fighting for? We are fighting for the protection of all bird kind. Who are you fighting against? Thronebreaker. His ilk and the storm. Why? The storm has clouded his mind. He seeks to spread the storm. If he has his way, the earth itself will be wiped clean. The storm that I unleashed. Yes. This is my fault. It is no fault of yours. No. The storm is uncontrollable.

Many have tried and failed to yoke it to their cause. But we did break it out of containment. I'm trying to get you off the hook a little bit here. I see what you're trying to do. I'm just saying there is some responsibility here. Possibly. And I appreciate you fighting our fight. Which is your fight. I'm not trying to take away your fight. Just sorry, dude. For doing this to you. And all your friends who died. That sucks. That sucks. Apology accepted, but unnecessary.

War is the fate of the warrior. And I, a warrior, am a warrior. That's deep. You really got stoic and serious and shit. War will do that to a bird. Do you still like to perform? Do you still know how to juggle? I haven't performed in nigh on however long it's been since I've seen you last. So you have not come to fight then? Not this war. We're fighting a bigger, bigger battle, my friend. What battle is that? I pull out the arrow. With the raven fletches on it. We're going for my father.

Nathaniel. My daddy. Daddy Nathaniel. Ah, I see. And we're also trying to get to a glacier that a wizard named Adernick Allwater used to live in. They said it was past a mountain range called the Jaws. Do you know where that is? Yes, but it is not a mountain range. What is it? It is a section of the ocean. What? Yes, this is what I said when I introduced the Jaws in the first place. Called the Jaws because the shifting flows destroy ships that pass through.

And there's giant frozen chunks of ice in it. Right, and it looks like jagged teeth. Exactly. Is it a frozen ocean? Partially. Much like the Arctic. Some of it's frozen, some of it's not. It's unpredictable, but I care not for the sea. Okay. Not even a little bit? My war is in the skies, Bing. In the skies. Cloudpiercer, our friends are back in the town. But I think we're going to have to leave after that. I mean, we were trying to be secretive and that was the opposite.

Will you take us up north and can one of your friends get our friends? Yes, this can be done. You have done us a great service this day. Thronebreaker does not often lose, but today, his humiliation will be felt. Also, what's the deal with the Beezor? Can he not cast lightning or whatever now because he doesn't have Beezor anymore? Yeah, does it grow back? Yeah. It does, yes. But it will take some time. And in that time, his power will be diminished. And will he hide in that time? He will.

He must. So we've bought you some time at least. You have. Peace is here. No. But for now, yes. That's what I meant. Okay. You've got a little… Chunk of peace. Yeah, a little bit. A moment of respite. Yes. To clean up our mess. Exactly. And so, you are welcome to rest here. May we join your flock. You may. But the storm and the sea carry much around the world. And there's something I believe that you have lost that I have found. And he walks into a cave in the side of the cliff.

And he rustles around in whatever's in there. So cute. And he comes back and clutched in his beak is a simple leather fanny pack. Fuck. What? I thought it was Allison's scarf. Never mind. That's where we're going to end it for this week. I'm your game master, Sean O'Hara. Joining me as always, playing Tacome Tome, the barbarian Abdul Aziz. Playing Ving the half-elf druid, Paul Loppers. Bye. Playing Fat Billy the halfling thief, Jessica Tai. It's okay. We'll get her scarf back. I don't care.

I don't want it back. I know you do. Yes, you do. Clap your soul. Find it again. Thank you to Aaron Reid for our intro and outro music. So incredible every time. You can find all the music performed on the show at SoundCloud. You can find Aaron's album, Healthy, at aaronreid.bandcamp.com. And if you want us to support the show on Patreon and get access to a bunch of bonus content and all that kind of cool shit, join us at patreon.com slash speltlore or speltlore.com slash money, please.

And you know what? Thank you to you for listening. We'll see you next time. And so ends the tale of adventures three Who tried the best they can Though dumb and scared and lost they be For time's abreast in revelry And though our journey may be like a conclusion We will not leave you without a resume Return next week to hear some more Whilst you commute or do your chores And for you I'd gladly Spout Lore