Episode Drop 1: The Critshow
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Welcome to The Critshow’s ‘Other Side of the Coin’ Universe, where the Keeper, Rev, will introduce you to our heroes, Jake, Tass, and TJ as they accept a mission from the Indianapolis Paranormal Taskforce. They battle with light switches and rigging rope as something devious lurks in the shadows…
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This episode of The Critshow featured Jake as the Divine, TJ as the Mundane, Tass as the Professional, and Rev as The Keeper.
This episode was edited by Brandon (Rev) Wentz with music by Jake Pierle.
Show transcript (autogenerated by Apple Podcasts) ▾
Hey spell orians sean abdul here with a little announcement and a little treat for you you dirty bitch we're just gonna move right past this no no I'll do it I'll do it right hey spell orians uh abdul here with an announcement and a little treat for you sean is also here oh we're partnering with uh with our friends over the crit show to do an episode swap so today we're going to be releasing the pilot episode of the crit show in our feed and they're going to be releasing the pilot episode of Spout Lore over in theirs we're joined today by uh crit show titan and keeper rev hello rev hi hi can you hear rev yes sick this works excellent look at us scrappy young bunch of people who know just enough technology to get ourselves in trouble just don't look at the efficiency of the setup don't ask too many questions about what's plugged into what this audio is coming out of a 1990s talk boy this one's going into a teddy ruxpin I'm terribly excited to see like how much of the preamble of us just trying to figure out all the technology we can use for anybody who has stumbled across this who is in this call right now uh my name is Abdul Aziz I am a cast member on the infinitely popular a role-playing game podcast most popular podcast in the world and I am and I am Sean O'Hara game master on the moderately popular very passionate fan base rpg podcast uh and I'm rev I am the gm and the producer for uh you know the middle of the road podcast the crit show uh which is focused in monster of the week the second most popular monster of the week podcast you just you can't do anything about those mikhail roy's I know right it's like look is if you google monster of the week podcast or Dungeon World podcast yeah there's gonna be some big names above us yeah for sure but once you get down down in the muck where we are it's nice it's comfortable it's like a it's a it's a it's a it's a it's a it's a it's a it's a it's a it's a It's like a pig sty, you know, cozy.
What we did was we dug a hole to the dungeons of podcasts. But that's where our world is. There's nowhere to go but up. Exactly. Did we say we're a Dungeon World podcast? Did you say Dungeon World podcast? I didn't. No, I said RPG podcast. Okay. I mean, you were listening to an RPG podcast before you got to our episode. So it's a Dungeon World podcast. Are we doing the one that will be in front of our episode in your feed? Oh, are we doing them both at the same time?
I feel like we might be doing… Are we doing them both? We might be doing them both. At the same time? This is where the curtain gets pulled back and it turns out there's another set of cameramen. And this is where the two podcast feed merge? Yes. And then our two universes collide? Yeah. My pop culture brain is struggling to make a reference right now. I can feel it on the edge of my vision. But I don't know what it is.
The thing I'm thinking of is the Illuminati comic where two universes kept crunching together. And so the Illuminati were destroying the other world to make sure that one of them would always survive. Because the two worlds couldn't exist at the same time. But they were trying to take up the same space. Oh. Cool. That's cooler than my reference, which was the TGIF Halloween lineup where Salem the cat went to Boy Meets World. Hell yeah. You know what? That was the only thing I could think of.
I think yours is far more on brand for both of our audiences. I'm glad other people… You guys remember that, right? I do remember that vaguely. Salem the cat went… He swallowed a magic disco ball and he went to Boy Meets World and it became the 1940s. You know, the most chipper and upbeat of all decades of American life. Some people say that that's where the Wachowskis came up with the idea for the Matrix. I want you to elaborate on why you think that reference makes sense.
He swallowed a disco ball and then he went to Boy Meets World. I don't know. He went to a different world. Do you not remember that scene where Neo swallows a little disco ball? In a car in the rain, they force him to swallow a disco ball and then Salem the cat bursts out of his belly button? You know what? No, you know what? We're not going to talk about the Matrix, but I was watching it the other day. That's a pretty good movie. It's a solid movie. It's great. Rev, what do you think?
You know, I sat down years ago when I was working at this theater and they were in a rotating rep and I was only in one of the three shows. So I had all this free time and there was a blockbuster across the street. And so I rented the big box set that had like all of the movies that had the animatrix. It had like everything they never made, including like the video game cut scenes.
And funnily enough, you know, if you watch everything they created, it actually all made sense because there were like scenes in the video game that you needed to know to connect information in the movies. Yeah. Yeah. Because it was it started. The main character was the guy from. The Matrix Reloaded. Yeah. What are what's her face? His friend. Yeah. The Merovingian. No, no, no. I think his name's Ghost. It's just like he's just kicking it in the side in the background.
But he's like the main character in the games. Did they ever explain in the games why that cake made you come? They explained it in the scene. Did they? You might have been distracted. I was distracted. I forgot about the cupcake. Okay. But it's still pretty good movies. Yeah. And we'll see, you know, what the next one's like. Yep. Also, Rev, I don't know how blue your show gets. Oh, right. The pilot episode was pretty clean. Yeah, it is. It progressively falls off. Yeah.
At one point, we bleep the word fuck, but we were doing it because I thought it was really funny because I've seen some. I've seen some TV shows where like that bleep is real funny. The best. Is when it only catches like the first half of the word. Right. So you're just kind of that you're like racing the person to bleep them out. It's not quite catching. So what do we. Oh, right. We're here to like talk about. We did. This just turned into a whole other show. Crunch cast.
Welcome to crunch cast. Everybody. Where we talk about universes crunching together. Brought to you by Nestle Crunch. The official chocolate bar of the Illuminati. Well, I think I just found our new T shirt. That's how the Illuminati finally blew their cover is they just could not resist sponsoring Nestle Crunch. I know it was a real problem. Okay. What are we talking about? Yes. So in theory, if we right now are recording the intro that we will both use. How about this? I will ask you.
Tell me about your show. What is Spout Lore? Okay. Uh, spout. Lore is a Dungeon World podcast that follows the exploits of three idiots, uh, in their quest to blunder their way through the world's most important events and Spout Lore. Um, you know, much later in our show, we go into Spout Lore and not the show, but the game we go into Dungeon World. Yeah. Yeah. How many times can I say Spout Lore in a way that will then make this sentence incoherent? Uh, but Spout Lore.
It's a show that I listened to to learn Dungeon World. Like I listened to the first couple of episodes to like get a feel for the system. And then I, I just kept listening. That's how they get you. That's so sweet. And also, um, you did not learn how to play Dungeon World. Listen, at some point you said the names of some moves, some dice were rolled. That's really all I needed. I did the same. Honestly, though, I did the same thing with monster of the week.
We haven't had the opportunity to listen to monster to play monster of the week, but I was like, I gotta get an idea of how it actually works. I was like, I gotta get an idea of how it actually works. I was like, I gotta get an idea of how it actually plays, uh, after reading the book 50 times. And the crit show was a great opportunity to do that. Cause it's a cool kind of modern setting.
You do the thing that I like that I've never tried where you're yourselves, but like placed into a fantastical situation, like magic cost players and theater companies that are secretly monster hunting organizations. Like so tight. Cool. I really liked this scene of the pilot where, uh, like you guys are driving. And like a 1992 Honda civic and someone's like, there's a lot of bullets in the back. I think TJ's like, there's a lot of bullets in the backseat here. What's this all about?
Is this a grenade? Uh, yeah. So, uh, as you said, it's, uh, the kind of the, the little twist on it is that my players play as themselves. And so they start out as the playbooks that are kind of closest to their, their personalities, uh, things they could justify. Uh, and then it turns into them be kind of coming. The folks who are pulled into a much more complicated story than they want to or prepared to be involved in.
Uh, and then we hit other powered by the apocalypse games because in the vein of so many monster shows, they discover the thing they need to defeat their big bad isn't here. And so they start dimension hopping. Uh, and each dimension is a different powered by the apocalypse game. Uh, that's so fucking sick. Such a cool setup.
It's also like for any of our listeners, like it'll be, it's really easy to jump onto the crit show because the powered by the apocalypse system makes it like so easy to like just follow what's happening. Totally. It's the same kind of dice rolls. It's the same kind of like success and failures. So like you're immediately like plugged into it. And the tone of the crew is very similar. It's like, it's, it's upbeat.
It's kind of more focused on the humor and the storytelling than it is on like the, you know, like super intense crunch. You got the, the crunch being like the mechanics and the math. Yes. Yeah. The, like the, it's not super focused on like the, the intricacies of the system, though it does hit the beats of the system very, very easily and very effectively. And it's nice. Cause you know, you talked about the energy around the table.
It's, you know, we are, are a group of friends and it feels very similar to when I listened to Spout Lore because starting off, I'm listening to all of you at a comedy club recording together. Can you, can you talk a little bit about that experience? Yeah, we, uh, Abdul, Paul and I, um, met doing comedy and Jessica, uh, and I met when we were children doing comedy, doing comedy, doing comedy. Uh, so we all kind of met at the same time where like Jessica and I were going to a lot of shows.
Uh, and then the mo when we decided we wanted to do a podcast, we all lived in tiny one bedroom apartments. And we thought, where's the best. The best place that we could do it. So we just did it in the back room of the comedy club that we started at. Yeah. That we started doing comedy at. Yeah. It was really cool. It's really cool to have like your, the place where you started comedy would be the place where you started your first podcast. I never thought about that. Yeah. Me neither. R.I.P.
Ratfish lounge. You were, you were too beautiful for this world. Yeah. The comedy club is still there, but that room, they gave it up. It was like an attic in the comedy club. Well, they sold it to. They gave it back to the hotel that it was in. And then the hotel got sold to another hotel chain. And now it's just like a haunted mansion. Basically. It's the spookiest place in Victoria. I think. Yeah. And what happened to the room? Is it just filled with ghosts now?
I actually walked in there like a year after cause they don't lock the door. So I just went into the bar and uh, it was just full of boxes. It was kind of sad. It was like the end of cheers when they like turn the lights off. Yeah. Yeah. It was like at the end of cheers when they sold cheers to the Ramada in. Did they turn the lights off at the end of cheers or was I thinking about boy meets world again? They do that at the end of fresh Prince for sure. And boy meets world. Okay. Yeah.
Probably cheers. Yeah. I remember the last episode of Alf. They shot Alf in the face. He did not do that, which it's funny that you do. You know, with about the last episode of Alf. Yeah. Everybody hated the show. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. They finally bust him, and then they never made another season. So the end of Alf is Alf getting captured by the FBI. Whoa.
And it's just a deep seed, because now they want to do a sequel show right about now to distract everyone, where it'll be Alf breaking out of his federal prison. Like 30 years later? Yeah. Honestly, I wasn't crazy about Alf when I was younger, but I would watch that. He's just all jacked and angry, though, now. He's got all the prison tattoos. He's been working out for 30 years. Can you imagine that puppet just ripped? I can. I don't want to, but I'm able to.
It's just Dwayne the Rock Johnson in an Alf head. With the hat on? That's great. Tell us about how the Crit Show kind of started. So it actually kind of started on accident, in that our podcast was originally going to be Pathfinder, and we were having some issues with the equipment. So I ordered some new equipment. And then a buddy of ours was over just hanging out. And so the four of us sat down to test the equipment.
I was like, oh, let's play Monster of the Week, because we had just bought that book the previous week. And everyone had joked about like, oh, if I was a playbook, this is the one I'd be. I said, so just play the playbook that you said you're going to be. And so we recorded it to test the equipment. And two of the folks left, and I turned to Tass, and he goes, well, that's the show. And I said, it is. Now we've got to figure out how to get everybody involved. Wait a second.
So you're telling me that you're piloting? Your pilot episode was accidentally recorded? Yeah. That's awesome. Like, the quality that came out of just let's sit down and see if the mics work is astounding. Yeah. So then we had to kind of go back and rerecord, like, character introductions and stuff, because we didn't do any of that. Did you guys all work at that theater that's in the pilot episode? So Tass works there. Jake worked there for a little while. And then I have never worked there.
And TJ didn't work there. But I worked at different theaters around. The area. Okay. Are you guys all, like, theater folks? Three of the four. Jake is not. Jake is a martial artist. Whoa. So cool. Cool. That's awesome. Yeah. He was just our role playing buddy who had just started, like, a year and a half before really getting into it. That's so sick. That's like Jessica. Yeah. Just, like, not being a performer and then ending up being one of the. Probably. Quickest and funniest cast members.
Okay. I mean, of course. Piece of shit. Of course. It's all a tie for first. He's like, I'm right here. I'm a cast member, Sean. And there's only three of us. Uh-huh. I'm just saying that Jessica went from not performing. So either I'm second worst now or last. I mean, if you keep it up, you're going to be last. Do we have to do this on the call with Rev? We have to do this right now. Fuck yeah. You dude. Bullshit. Abdul brought me in to mediate. Sean, this is an intervention. An intervention?
I thought you were going to say couples therapy. What did I do? That's what an intervention starts. This is an intervention. An intervention? I thought it was for Abdul. You suck. I'm great. What points have we hit so far? The systems. Yeah. Yeah. That's it. The systems, the vibes. Yeah. And what's your website? Where can people find you? If on our feed, they listen to this and they're like, Hey, I want to listen to more. Yeah.
You can find us at spell or.com and you find us at hot meat boys.com. Yeah. That will get explained in season three. If you ever get there. Yeah. That's the easiest way to find us is just honestly, if you, uh, we picked a specific enough name that if you just search Spout Lore, you'll find us. Yeah. And it's not sprout lore, which is what a lot of people end up typing in, including my dad. He still thinks it's called. Spout Lore. So your dad right now is just listening to a botany podcast.
Exactly. He doesn't know what a podcast is. I don't think. No. And also definitely not what our podcast is. Imagine Pat called you. It was like, I heard you guys on the crit show. That's good. You know, I wasn't, I wasn't sure if it was going to translate over to, uh, to monster of the week that easily, but, uh, it was pretty, you know, it was a similar, I like the similarness in the systems, the difference in genre. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.
Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Literally. My dad is just like, I built another shed. That's sort of his interests. Dad, you got to stop building shit. I can't stop. They kicked me out of home Depot. Where can people find you rev and the crit show? Yeah. They can find us at the crit show podcast.com or the crit show, wherever you listen to podcasts and on most social medias. Um, and I noticed, you know, I was just, this is kind of a side tangent, but your, your art is so beautiful.
Um, and I was looking at your website. I was looking at your website the other day and I see that you have your show broken up into seasons. Um, is that something that is when, when someone downloads the show and they look at, um, you know, the episode numbers, is that all broken into seasons there as well? Or is it just a running number and you kind of know where the season breaks? No, the season breaks are like programmed into the podcast feed.
So like if you subscribe to it, like in just any podcatcher, like you'll see season one, season two, season three, season four. Uh, and if your listeners like the first episode, but they want to like kind of sample more of whatever's going on later in the podcast, we have like a section of the website that's just fan favorite moments that they can go to. And it's just fun clips from, from like later seasons and stuff that they can be like, Oh, is this my vibe or what? And what about you guys?
You guys have like 200 plus episodes. And you've swapped shows like eight times and then you play like a billion different systems on your Patreon. So yeah, we do. We have a bunch. Like if you go to our feed, there are, there's a lot of episodes. Um, they are broken down the same way by season and then also by bonus content. Um, so we are in our fourth season. Uh, our seasons are kind of around like 45 to 50 long.
Um, and then all of those other episodes are either live shows that we've done, or we also make let's plays for newly releasing RPGs or RPGs. So we have a bunch of things that are just going on to Kickstarter. People will come to us and we'll do like a three or four episode.
Little mini playthrough where the creator of the game will come on, walk us through character creation, and then we'll play a one shot of it and we'll put that out and they'll use it on their, um, on their feeds or their patron page or what have you. But we also publish it on our main feed. So there's a bunch of playthroughs of like fate of Cthulhu and a gone and a lot of, uh, indie RPG games. That's sick. I listened. I recently was listening to your podcast.
I listened to your, uh, perilous tides game and so, so cool. Great game. Cool setting. Yeah. If anybody out there is making an RPG, we're open to that. I want to play more games. I'm trying to convince, I got to slowly trick these guys into playing other RPGs because none of them played RPGs before we started the podcast. So every time I introduce new rules to them, they get mad at me.
So any opportunity I can have to hoodwink them into playing a new powered by the sun, I'm going to play a new one. I'm going to play a new one. I'm going to play a new one. I'm going to play a new one. I'm going to play a new one. It's a ton of fun. I'll take it. And if there's anyone out there who's designing an ALF RPG, come get at me. I want to play as ALF and I want to fight my way out of a government facility. Well, see, you're making a joke, but that's a pretty good idea.
Most of my jokes are good ideas. I mean, the kids on bike system could facilitate an ALF style RPG where you all collaboratively control ALF. Hello, my name is ALF. That is the opposite of what ALF sounds like. My name is ALF. Who are you? Don't do this. Don't make me feel like you don't know what ALF sounds like and then have to clarify it to you. No, I know it, Alphys. I know you do. I'll do his voice right there. No, you won't. That's what I thought you were going to do. My name is ALF.
Okay, so yeah, Spellorians, if you want to check out the Crit Show, go check out the Crit Show podcast. And enjoy their pilot episode. Which we will play right now. Well, hello and welcome to the very first episode of the Crit Show. This is an actual play podcast of a tabletop RPG. And… And… And if you're unfamiliar with this type of podcast, then all those words I just said are most likely gibberish.
If you've never played a tabletop RPG before, the quick and dirty version of it is that you have a group of people at a table telling an interactive story. One of them is the game master or GM. They act as a storyteller or a narrator for the game world. While the other players, or PCs, at the table control only one character each. Now, what separates an RPG from an interactive story is that instead of just saying what they want to do, the PCs roll dice after they declare.
And the results dictate how well or poorly their character did in the story the GM is telling alters from there. When prepping this podcast, we played four or five different games with different people as GM and ultimately landed on Monster of the Week for our first game. Monster of the Week is pretty user-friendly for both the players and for someone listening in at home.
Now, later I'm sure we'll play other games, but for now, we'll follow in the footsteps of Buffy and the Winchester brothers and Ashley Williams. Okay, that's enough out of me. Enjoy episode one and welcome to the Crit Show. Hello and welcome to the Crit Show. My name is Brandon Wentz, but please call me Rev. Around the table we have… Hi, I'm Tass. I'm Jake. And I'm Teej. This is an actual play podcast where we play Monster of the Week.
But our little twist on this is that one night we were at C2E2, who we hope will sponsor us one day just by us saying their name. Just for that. Just for that. That's all it takes, right? Yeah, I think so. Oh, I'll actually be right back. There's somebody knocking. I'm at the door. I assume it's them. Oh, it's the C2E2 guy. All right. Sponsored. Sponsored. All right. Sweet. But one night, talking about playing this game, and the idea came across that what if they played as themselves?
And we talked about it a little bit and realized that there were a couple of playbooks in this game that, with just a couple minor changes to their normal everyday lives, could be feasible. So we are playing through Monster of the Week. I am the Keeper, and these guys are actually playing themselves in what we'll call the other side of the coin universe. Monster of the Week is a…
A Powered by the Apocalypse game, which means that they have two six-sided die, and they'll roll those dice to figure out if they are successful. A 10 to 12 is a really good success. A 7 to 9 is a moderate success. And then a 6 and under is not good for them. So why don't you guys tell me a little bit about who you are and what you do? Absolutely. So I am playing what's called the Professional.
What I'm modeling that after is that I, in real life, work at a theater, a live play, you know, live action theater. I work in a ticket office. For this, what I have adapted is the playbook called, again, the Professional. What they are is they work for kind of a monster hunting organization.
So they're tasked with hunting down paranormal activities in any given area and, you know, taking care of business, whether that's killing the monster or stopping the ghost or finding the werewolf's whereabouts. Whatever it might be, that's kind of what they do. For our purposes, we're saying in this other side of the coin universe… I love that, by the way. …that… The theater at which I work is a cover for this monster hunting agency.
The theater's called the Indiana Players Theater, or IPT for short. But what that actually stands for is the Indiana Paranormal Task Force by, well, by day and by night, I guess, both cases. I mean, because monster hunting doesn't really have hours. No, it does not. As the Professional, what are some things you can do? Really, their whole shtick is acting under pressure, which is kind of one of the major moves. That anybody can do, but they're especially good at it.
Whether that's dealing with combat situations, helping out buddies that are in danger, helping civilians that are in danger. They can slide in, take care of business, and get out, whatever that is. Jake. Yep? Tell us about who you are and what you do. Like me, me? Like my… No. Me outside of the playbook? I don't know. Do you do anything interesting outside of the playbook? No. So I'm playing the Divine. The Divine is basically angel-empowered or, like, God-powered. The shtick here…
The shtick here is that at some point I was working on a Thor costume, and then all of a sudden my Mjolnir was very real and heavy. Because one of the weapons that I get to pick from for this playbook was a Thunder Hammer, and that sounded pretty sick to me. So I have been given powers by the Norse gods. So I am pretty tough, which helps me fight bad things. I can smite things. I can lay on hands. I can soothe. So if I just talk to somebody gently, then they're supposed to chill.
I can chill out. Kind of like real life. Yeah. Listen to that silky voice. And then I'll get some more angel-y things as we go along. I can get straight-up wings. I can… But not wings that let you fly, right? You're just kind of like an ostrich? Yeah. I have two wings that are about the size of, like, a chicken wing. Oh, good. But they're on my full-size body, and they just flap uncomfortably. Like, I don't have control over them. Oh, God. He's like Angel from X-Men. Oh, God.
When he gets his… After he gets them cut off, yeah. He's got little stumps. He's got wings. But they're barbecue boneless on his back. And they're on my back. I'm hungry, so I'm going to grab them. What about you, TJ? What do you do? I am the mundane. And also, the player character that I'm playing is also called the mundane. Aww. Yeah. Pity points. Anyway, my character is basically the everyday sort of guy. Like, I guess you would kind of compare it to Xander in Buffy the Vampire Slayer.
Ah, nice. Where he just kind of shows up and causes a little bit of ruckus every once in a while, but he also helps out as well. So, I have some powers that allow me to go off on my own. And whenever I do that, I get experience or I can do investigation that way. And then I just am somewhat more lucky. You're like the accidental hero. Yeah, basically. I like it.
And I think the important thing to point out is that TJ is different than NPCs that the players might encounter because the NPCs are truly mundane. But TJ is still a monster hunter. He's not just an everyday average guy. He still can do things that normal people can't. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. My luck is just a little bit better than most people. So, that helps me to get around things, I think. You're Jar Jar Binks.
I was going to say like a poor man's long shot. Oh. Yeah. That's a lot better. Yeah, right? Nobody wants to be Jar Jar Binks. No. So, in the playbooks, there are also the player histories. You pick a history that goes with each of the other players at the table. This was a little easier since you guys are actually kind of playing yourselves, but at least let's go through them and talk about what ones you picked for each other. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay.
With TJ is that I'm supposed to protect him. So whatever gave me my powers, part of the duties therein was, hey, TJ is really important to something that's going to happen. So here are these powers, keep him safe. And so that is my history with him is I basically told him, quote, you have a crucial role in what is to come. I am here to guide and defend you, end quote.
When you said that, were they your own words or were you kind of moving like a puppet, like something was just like, you are crucial in something that is to come? I think that that is what flashed in my head when I got my powers and I just recited it verbatim to him. Your deity was just whispering into your ear. It was like, TJ is crucial in the events to come. But mine was just more like, TJ is crucial in the events to come, period. I am here to protect and defend you, period.
And you were saying it over like a paper plate full of pizza. Oh yeah. I brought it up just real casual. We were hanging out. Oh, hey, kind of related. I have God powers and you're really important. Can you pass me another slice, please? And then my history with Tass is they are at heart a good and righteous person. You must help them stay that way, which I feel like is essentially just real life. So it made sense to pick it in the game.
Yeah, I think we need to make a decision on mine here because mine with Jake is that we have worked together unofficially in the past successfully. So in some way, clearly, I know that you have those abilities. And we've done something successfully with them. How about this? We were hanging out and we were walking somewhere and there was a cat stuck in a tree and I was like, oh, hold on. And I smashed that tree to bits with a hammer and I got the cat out and high-fived you at the end.
I caught the cat. Okay. I hit the tree repeatedly and shook the cat loose and you caught the cat. And then we high-fived and we kept the cat. What is our cat's name? I hate every part of this canon. And what about you and TJ? We were friends back in training. Before I was a part of the agency and before I was recruited. And this could be any number of things, which this is kind of part of our real life.
We went to college together, acted together, had all sorts of on and off stage shenanigans, including lots of martial arts training and several other things. So yeah, we've really worked together a lot. Yeah. We're good friends from way back. I obviously don't really know too much about the IPT. I'm not asking you to collaborate his story. Oh, well. I didn't think you would. He was lying. I basically said we're good friends. Tell them if it's from way back or recently.
And I said they're from way back. That's it. That's all they had. That's literally all it is. And I was trying to expound on that a little bit. I'm so uninterested in your guys' friendship, though. That's almost as bad as the threat of you guys wanting a joint cat. Did you hear that? He said almost. And then Jake introduced me to the existence of monsters and it says, tell them how you feel about that, Jake. Yes. I feel good about this. Okay, good. I genuinely didn't know.
I didn't know which direction I was going to go. And I genuinely feel good about this monster hunting for the fact that if this actually happened in my life, I'd be totally on board with it because my life is so goddamn boring. So goddamn boring. Yeah, mine too. Tass, it's been a few days after you have been given the go-ahead to join the IPT, the actual IPT, not the one where you sell tickets to Noises Off. And you get a phone call in the morning. It's Margaret.
And she says, we've got a little problem. I need you to go check out a theater. We're thinking about buying it. And well, we were buying it because it's got a history of supernatural problems. Well, we had to make it look like we were looking at it for the theater. And so we sent in a couple of designers to check the space and see if it would work. And the lighting designer was killed. Oh my God, how? He fell onto the stage. It seemed like off of a ladder and just broke his neck.
So we're assuming that's not an accident. Well, I mean, he was very clumsy. He was very good at what he did. I can imagine someone who spends 50% of their time on a ladder while doing light hangs and stuff like that would just fall off randomly. Okay. I mean, I can go check it out, get the lay of the land. Yeah. The only thing is though, I mean, we haven't bought the place yet, so it's not going to be just open to the public during the day.
So you might need to go at night, you know, jiggle, jiggle, open window, sneaky, sneaky, that kind of stuff. Yeah, that's fine. We don't have anyone that could join you. Do you know anyone, who maybe could give you a hand? I don't know if you can, can you reach the window by yourself? Do you need a boost? I could do fine on my own. Okay. Well then go by yourself. But I've got some friends that might- Oh no, it's too late. It's too late. This is a solo mission now. No, I've got some guys.
Yeah, I've got some guys. All right, good. Well, yeah, there's a little bit of a payday in it for them if they help you out. All right. What's the address? Give me all of the details, the very specific- The Halifax Theater. And it's right on Drury Lane, right next to the muffin shop. So just head on down there, make sure it's dark and sneaky, sneaky. It sounds like she's trying to get you jumped. Oh yeah, wait until it's nighttime and then just try to pick that lock.
There should be a guy there wearing a yellow hat and you wink at him twice. Oh my God. Yeah, absolutely. So I would give a call to my buddy, I think Jake Purley, ring. Thank you. Hello. What's up, buddy? We would have sat here in silence for 20 minutes until that phone rang. I would have waited for that sound. Nothing. What's going on, pal? Okay. So I guess I'm not sure how to- He's what? He's my pal. Okay. Can we not be pals? You guys can definitely be pals.
I don't think I've ever heard you say pal though. What is this, a conference call? Get off. Am I on speakerphone? I hear TJ responding to the things I'm saying. It's very echoey and you hear me peeing into a toilet. I'm glad you clarified into a toilet. Oh, hi Tass. What's going on? Okay. Weird question. Your God powers thing. Yeah. Is this a thing that you're allowed to make money using? That's an excellent question.
They didn't say that I couldn't, so it's better to ask forgiveness than permission. Oh, okay. I like that. Okay. Here's what's going on. So I work for an agency now that hunts monsters. Sick. How'd you get that? Yeah. It's kind of a long story, but that's the deal. And if you're supposed to be keeping people safe and that kind of thing, I could use your help. There is a chance there is something that's hurting people in town and I'm supposed to go check it out, but I don't really have backup.
And I wanted to see if maybe that was up your alley. Yeah, sure. I'd be happy to help you. I can bring TJ along. He needs the practice. Okay. He's doing okay with his stuff? Yeah. He's actually coming along really nice. I keep losing him and then finding him. But well, here's the weird part though. In that time, he has somehow figured shit out. Okay. Well, I'll see what I feel about that when I see it. Okay. Well, yeah, we'll come help. Where are you? I am at the theater. What the- My theater.
You guys can come here and then I'll lead you to where we're going. Okay. See you soon. Click. There we go. Full circle. Is there anything you guys are doing before you leave? I mean, I'm gearing up. I need my stuff. I'm just getting out of the shower. Good. Okay. Yeah. I'll go knock on the bathroom door, I guess. Yeah. What's up? Tass has a mission for us. We need to go fight evil. Should I bring my nunchucks? I mean, I genuinely, I mull it over for a second. I don't know how to use nunchucks.
So I'm just going to have to assume you're learning that from YouTube videos. Yep. As you said earlier, I seem to figure it out. I just go off and do my own thing and I figure it out. Yeah. And you just come back with skills. You watched that Bruce Lee playing ping pong with nunchucks video like a dozen times. I did. And I thought it was the real thing too. It was so well done. Okay. How are you guys getting there? My car. My car that works pretty well. Better than my car? Better than his car.
I don't know why. I thought you were lying. My car that works better than his. There is some shiftiness in your voice. I know that your car works better, but you seem untrustworthy. What's your charm? Two. All right. You know what? I believe it now. All right. Good. So you guys arrive at the IPT. I think I'd be there waiting, ready to roll out. Okay. Okay. Where are we headed? I'll explain on the way and I'm going to lead you out to my car, which is…
Which you guys have seen several times before. It's a haggard looking old thing. Pretty dinged up and kind of rusty and doesn't look like it's in particularly great shape. Tass, you just want to take my car? I mean, it's just right around the block. Nope. Are you sure? I mean, it's pretty good. Nope. Yours is… Just whack. Come with me and get in the car, please. Okay. And as we kind of get in… Okay. So we're pretty sure that something killed a guy. We're looking at this old theater.
We want to potentially take it over to the other side. Take it over as a new place of operation. But one of the guys checking it out was… Well, he died. It looked like an accident, but it just seems very unlikely. So that's what we're going to go do is essentially try to poke around, see if we find anything unnatural, deal with it if we can. Hopefully it's nothing and it was just an accident. How'd he die?
He was up on a ladder poking around looking at some of the technical stuff up in the grids and the balconies and the high areas and just inexplicably fell. Somebody that probably… Probably wouldn't have or shouldn't have. But accidents happen, so we'll see. So what do you guys do when you get there? It's probably about 11 o'clock by the time you get there. You got quite a few hours before it's dark before you could sneak in unseen, hopefully.
I definitely want to just watch, kind of see if there are people coming in and out, any owners of the building or people doing any renovations, anything like that at all, and see if we essentially have anybody that we're going to have to contend with that might still be in the building by the time we want to sneak in. Yeah. Throughout the course of the day, you don't see anybody. Really, IPT, we're the only people that were interested in this space. There's no one going in and out.
They know that the body has been taken away yesterday when it happened. Okay. So yeah, I think we'd just be kind of shooting the shit and watching and… While we're shooting the shit, I'm looking around in the backseat, seeing if there's any cool stuff in a case or anything like that, a la Tim from Jurassic Park, and he finds the binoculars that are like night vision goggles. Oh, gosh.
As you look through the pocket behind the seat and the ashtray built into the door and the pull-down sun visor above your head, things just come out. Shotgun shells, grenades, some very long, what you can only assume are sniper bullets. Dude, you got like a lot of bullets and stuff back here. And you look back and he's literally just holding a handful of like shotgun shells and cartridges, and grenades. I didn't know you did grenades and shit.
I thought it was like, you know, all crosses and crossbows and holy water. Other words with cross in it. Crossfit. Hot cross buns. Crossword puzzles. David Cross is back there. He's cross-stitch. There is a cross-stitch back there. It says, God bless this mess. Yeah, no, dude. Like monsters don't kill themselves. So. Cool. Can I keep a grenade? No. Please. Okay. Well, I'll make you a deal. Uh-huh. No. Please. Have you been watching YouTube videos about how to use grenades? I have not. Then no.
I pull out my phone and I just like start looking for. I thought you were going to say the pin. I pull out the pin. This is mine till I let it go. This is how it works, right? He's just keeping us all hostage. Who's in charge now? I pat TJ on the shoulder reassuringly. It's okay, buddy. You're getting there. I believe in you, but not, not yet. And I gently take the grenade away from him and I put it back where it belongs. In the cup holder. In the cup holder.
Uh, then I take that grenade out of the cup holder and I put it in my pocket. A grenade that isn't really a thing that I'm supposed to have. Why aren't you supposed to have it? Cause that's not one of the weapons I took. Good. All right. Well, I guess you could have let him keep it then. And if it wasn't, I mean, if you love it, let it free. And no, I wanted that. Grenade. We don't let a grenade free. Actually, this is what we call a gimme. So I took my gimme. Yeah, that's fair.
So it gets nighttime. I assume that you guys are going to go out now and attempt to get inside the Halifax theater. Absolutely. Um, what is the situation with like streetlights and stuff? There are streetlights on the outside. Uh, there is an alley on each side of the Halifax theater and you can tell that the lot behind it is condemned. Uh, what do you think boys? I'm thinking darkness is the. Yeah. I say we at least check down an alley. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Maybe go all the way around the back.
I don't know. We'll see what's on the sides. Sure. Let's do that. I'm going to grab a couple of things out from a little strong box under the seat. And what are those things? Uh, one is a 38 that I will holster on my hip. And then I have a shotgun, which I'm going to slip into a sheath on my back. Anything else anyone wants to grab? Well, I've got my nunchucks. And I have my hammer. Oh, and I also have like a little mini multi-tool as well. So if I need to Jimmy a lock or something. All right.
So you grab your gear from the lock box underneath your seat and you guys head across the street. Where are you going? What are you doing? I think we'll head for that alley. Okay. Left or right alley. Is one of them darker than the other? Uh, is one of the alleys named Kirstie? No. That would be the wider alley. It's not darker than the other. I refuse to acknowledge what he just said to me. He knows how I feel about Kirstie alley. I'm going to go down the right alley. Okay.
What are you guys doing? I'm following him unless he specifies a different plan. I believe that he knows what he's doing and I'm going to stick with him. And as they're both following each other, I will also go to a different alley. You're going to try to sneak away? Yeah. Why don't you roll me and act under pressure? Will do. Five. That's with my cool. So with a five, with act under pressure, a six and under simply states that things go to hell.
As TJ starts to peel off from you guys, you're headed down the right alley. He cuts in front of the building to get to the left alley. We see this figure lunge out, grab him and pull him inside. Unbeknownst to the two of you. I get experience for that. You do. Tell us why. Because I have a power called. Don't worry. I'll check it out. And anytime I go off on my own to a scary situation, I get experience. Gotcha. You also get an experience just for failing the role.
Because every time anybody fails a role in this game, you get an experience. That's what I was just wondering. Did you? Did you successfully scope out the scary situation? Or. Well, I didn't know it was scary at the time. So I guess. So we'll give you the experience for failing the role. Okay. All right. That's fair. Point of interest. I also have a power called always the victim. Wherein if I get captured by the monster, then I mark experience as well. Oh, that's fair.
Then you get two points of experience. Okay. He is. Gosh, he gets two experience points and he gets to sit out for a half hour. It's like his dream job. Map. He just took off his headphones. Take it from here, boys. He's laid down in the kitchen. He cuddled up with the dog and went to sleep. So you guys are in the alley. I'm looking for a door. Okay. Why don't you investigate a mystery? Okay. The mystery of how to get into the Halifax Theater. Love it. Seven. So how are you looking around?
Do you have a source of light? Do you have. I am using the flashlight on my iPhone. Excellent. Excellent. This week's episode sponsored by Apple. Oh my God. You guys are not going to believe who's at the door right now. What is the. What was your. Apple. Seven. Seven. All right. So that gives you a hold one. Do you have a question you'd like to ask? I want to see what's being concealed here in the way of the easiest access into the building. Great.
So you see that in this alley down almost at the end where the corner would be turned to go to the back of the building. There is a door that has been painted on to the building. It looks like kind of a piece of scenery that they've painted on the outside, but the door is actually a door. But you would almost miss it if you didn't see the just a little protrusion of the handle sticking out. Nice. I'll try the handle. It's open. Okay. That was easier than I thought.
And then I'm going to look back to my boys. Well, not boys. Boy, you see only Jake. TJ's not there. Where did he go? So I look around and I realize that TJ is gone. Yeah, he's sure not there. And I'm like, God damn it. And then I get struck by lightning. Probably. Gosh, darn it. A little shock. You want a third one on that? No, it's just going to get worse. I think. Gee willikers. It's one direction. One direction or the other. Is it more G rated or is it more R rated? I don't know.
I want to roll to investigate a mystery to figure out where TJ went. Do it. That's a seven plus sharp, which is nothing. That's a seven. All right. You get a hold one. Where did it go? Where did it go? Where did it go? You start to. You track your footsteps back. Just looking. I assume you grab Eric's iPhone and use the light on it, too. I have my own. Okay. Do you keep it near your hammer? That's real dangerous. I think that the iPhone's in my right pocket and the hammer is in my hand.
So you start to track back the footsteps that you have made through this alley. You get your phone out of your pocket and turn the light on. And you realize that as you guys came across the street, you can see pretty clearly that your footsteps go off into the right. And that TJ's start to go left. But then you can see almost like his heels were drug towards the front door. But the front door is closed. I want to try the front door. It's locked. And you guys are in the light.
Just in the sense of you're dressed in armor with a giant hammer. You are now in the streetlights. So there is a chance of traffic coming by and seeing you or, you know, someone neighbor calling the cops. I guess go back down the alley and in the door that I know will open. Okay. And I mean, I'm just telling him like what I noticed. Okay. Looks like TJ got drug inside. We need to get in there as quickly as possible and figure out what happened to him. Okay. Well, that sort of answers one thing.
At least if you said something dragged him in, that's not great. So I'm going to get my shotgun out and open that door. So you open the door and inside it's just really dark. Do you have just a regular flashlight? What's wrong with it? It's so weak. It doesn't go very far. Mine's really good. Really? Yeah. Mine's not. My iPhone flashlight doesn't light a very good area. I got to hold it like pretty close. To whatever I want to actually see detail of.
I feel like all it does is give me away in the dark. Which is what a flashlight does. But a flashlight at least also helps me see things. Okay. I'm going to run out to my car and I'm going to grab a mag light. Okay. And come back. Thank you. You're welcome. I'll take the mag light. All right. Look for lights. Look for a switch. I do that. All right. Roll to investigate a mystery. The mystery of where are the lights? I don't do that, but I do get an experience point. Oh, great.
So yeah, you start to look around. Uh, using the flashlight to try to find some kind of a light switch and you step on, it sounds like a light bulb and you hear this loud pop sound and it kind of echoes through the theater. And all of a sudden you have the sense that it may have been audible just everywhere. Oh, darn. And I'm going to get down and see what that was. It was a light bulb. Oh, okay. Yeah, of course. There's a light bulb there on the ground. Why wouldn't there be? Yeah.
If you look up, you see that there's a couple of lighting instruments and one of them has been torn apart. Someone had laid the pieces out to put it back together. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Got to back around to it. Lovely. Okay. Let's keep moving. Uh, yeah. I want to move in and towards the direction of the front door where the front door would be. Okay. And are you giving up on the search for a light switch?
I will look for a light switch. Okay. Roll it. Oh my God. I get experience. Great. So you're like, God, you're, why, how did you step on that light bulb? Let me find the light switch. And, uh, as you do so you trip over him as he's bent over trying to get the pieces of light bulb. Out of his shoe. And you hit a wall. And as you hit the wall, a door slides open that you didn't quite see. And you see a set of glowing eyes inside looking at you. Oh shit. And I try to backpedal out.
Act under pressure. Whew. Seven. All right. Oh, eight actually. All right. So with an eight, this is our first act under pressure. That wasn't just a straight out failure for act under pressure on a seven to nine. You get a worse outcome, a hard choice or a price to pay your worst outcome. Is that you don't make it out the door and you have to face whatever this is.
Your hard choice is that you can make it out of the door and away from this thing, but you're going to leave Jake between you and it. Or your price to pay is that you can get both of you a couple more steps away, but you're pretty sure that this thing is going to get a swipe at you. I think I just don't make it out. So you start to back up and you realize that there's not a good clean way to get out. And the set of glowing eyes moves closer to you and lunges in your direction as it does.
It appears in the light for just a brief moment. And it looks like a small rag doll figure, but made out of fluctuating, shifting shadow. And as it lunges towards you, you see its fingers get longer and it stabs into your foot. And you realize that this thing can't be more than seven or eight inches high. It must have been up on something high when it was looking at you before. And then it pulls its hand out of your foot and starts to back up and hiss at you. You take one harm. I actually.
I actually don't take that harm. Why? Because all of the agents at IPT, our outfits are retrofitted with armor underneath. How much armor? Plus one. Okay. So you take one less harm when attacked physically. That is exactly right. All right. You see this thing take a few steps back from you. I'm going to hold the gun up, like not pointed at it, but like hand up and then gun pointed at the sky. Whoa. Hey, you're. Cool looking little dude. I mean, you no harm. We're just here to help.
As you say that, you see two more sets of eyes appear in the dark room. Oh, cool. There's lots of you cute little guys. So you hear him saying this as he's tripped over you and knocked over this door. Can I see the eyes? Yes. What are those? I don't know. Why are you so happy about this? I'm trying. I'm trying to put out a positive vibe towards what I assume is a predator.
As you guys are having this conversation and you're watching the eyes in the dark room, you see that they get really close to each other and it almost looks like they combine because the size of the eyes get a little bigger and a little higher and then again. And now you see larger eyes standing at about two feet high. And it's just one set now? Yep. And the hiss is a little deeper. Oh, that's a good trick. I'm going to go talk to my buddy about that. I'm going to do that trick calmly.
And I'm just going to slow. You see the eyes get lower as if it's leaning down to pounce forward. I'm going to throw my hammer at it, please. All right. Roll kick some ass. Damn it. No. That is, oh man, that's a six. That was so close to at least functioning. You go to throw your hammer. What kind of damage does your hammer do? It does three harm, hand stun wholly. Great. Great. Great. Great. Great. Great. Great. Great. Great. Great. Great. Great. Great. Great. Great. Great. Great. Great. Great.
Great. Great. Great. Great. Really. Forward throw. You must have gotten some grease or something on the floor because it slips out of your hand and lands on your head, dealing you two points of damage. Okay. I am going to reduce that by one because of my armor. So I take one harm. And your hammer is on the floor next to you. This thing lunges and swipes out at you. At me? Yes. I don't like that. Can I protect him? No. You've just been hit in the head with your own hammer.
Would you like to act under pressure to get away? Yeah. Okay. I'd very much like that. Roll it. Eight. So again, an eight gives you a couple of choices. You can either not get away because you're going to block Jake from this monster. You can dive out of the way knowing that the creature will most likely hit Jake. Or you can get out of the way, but you're pretty sure that if you do, it's going to hit that stand of lights and make a whole lot more noise.
So if there's anything else in this building, it's going to know you're here. I am going to start to backpedal and realize that I know. No, I'm not going to make it and just brace for it. All right. So this thing lunges out and it swipes at you again. And you can see that it is indeed about three times larger. It's got these large yellow eyes. And again, it's got this skin that almost kind of looks like fluctuating, pulsing shadow.
And the fingernails come out and slash across your stomach and you take two harm. Oof. So I get to reduce that by one, but still. Okay. Ow. Okay. I think that I… I take that hit and I kind of stagger back and I see Jake is what, on the ground now? He's bending over to pick up his hammer. I don't think I am. I don't think I would bend over to pick up my hammer.
I think if I got hit in the head with the hammer and the thing went at him, I think I would just try to punch it in the face like real hard. Oh, God. Do you have a damage for just your… Yeah. My smite counts. I do two harm. Oh, I see. Unarmed. Okay. How does smite work? Tell me about it. It is just… It always counts as a weakness against the monster I'm fighting. Any attack I do… I do against a monster counts as its weakness. And if I don't have a weapon, then I do two harm.
That also still counts as a weakness. Okay. Two harm, intimate hand messy with unarmed attacks. Great. Roll kick some ass. Yeah, boy. That is a 10. Great. So choose one extra effect. I think I just want to inflict terrible harm. And that does how much more? Plus one. So a total of three harm on this thing. I think that I just really… Like, I see it going after my friend and I just blast this thing. It's hard. I'm going to try as hard as I can. You wind up. Your fist glows a little bit.
And you hit it for three harm because you're doing just extra damage to it based off of its weakness. It grabs onto your forearm, giving you two damage in return, but actually only one damage. Because of me armor. And as it's hit, it splits into two much smaller versions of itself. Pick a dance partner. Okay. So I see them split. Whichever one is closer to me, I'm going to level the shotgun and pull the gun. And trigger. Roll it. Okay. Oh, yeah, boy. Oh, but it is still technically a nine.
Oh, no. Yeah. And what is your shotgun's descriptive verbs? Oh, yes. The descriptors for my shotgun are three harm, close, messy. So you pull your shotgun out and you pull the trigger right in its face. It slashes out at you and does two damage, but you can see that it stops moving. And it actually starts to melt into a puddle. Oh, my God. I think I got one. TJ, you're walking towards the alley and you pass the door and you get this weird sensation that you're being watched.
And before you have the opportunity to return and see what's going on, you feel yourself being pulled into the theater. You're left inside the door, but you don't feel like you're being held anymore. You're just in this dark room. And it's completely dark. It is completely dark. I'm going to pull up. My phone light. I hope you're all keeping track of your battery percentages. A hundred percent. Except whenever, you know, I use it during the day. It's at like 14 percent.
Probably because I've been sitting in that car all day. So, yeah, I pull out my phone light. I check my battery. It's probably about 14 percent. This isn't good. So I'm going to investigate this place that I'm in. Where am I? Yeah. Roll investigate a mystery. Yeah. All right. Nice. That would be an 11. Great. So you get hold two. Do you have two questions you'd like to ask? I do. Where did it go? The thing that drug me into this particular part of the theater.
And what's the other question you might ask? The other question. What sort of creature is it? You start to flash the light around and you see this figure on its knees inside of the lobby. And you see the light from the door. You're flashlight almost seems like the light from it's being absorbed. And you see that little puddles of this shadow are dripping off of this figure. And they're kind of popping up into these little doll shapes and running away. They have these little yellow eyes.
You can see them running deeper into the theater. And with everyone that comes off, you can see more and more of the person underneath. And the shadows start to disperse entirely into a pool around this person. And the figure looks up and it's me. And I'm breathing. I'm breathing heavy. And I am panic. And I say, TJ, you have to help me. And the shadows reach up, grab me and pull me back into the darkness. And now you're in the lobby by yourself again. I'm going to try and go after you.
Roll act under pressure. You're going to try to chase through the darkness. Okay. That ain't bad. Ten. Excellent. So you do exactly what you want with a ten. You follow this trail and you can kind of hear me talking for just a brief second. But then it's gone. And it's just this odd growl. So as you run along, you got your phone out. Still at 14%. Not bad. You'll wrap this up in 13%. I'm sure. You're chasing along. You've got the light up.
And you see this creature on hands and knees just sprinting through the theater up onto the stage. And then it leaps up into the grid. And so you're standing amongst the seats. And you can look up and you can see this thing crawling around inside of the grid. Oh, shit. I need to get up there somehow. Wait a minute. This would probably be better if my friends were with me. Damn. Okay. I'm going to look around for a way to get up to the grid. Roll read a bad situation. That's not as good.
I got a six. So you think that the best way to do it is there's a rope hanging down the side of the stage that you can see is tied to the light grid. And you think that the best option would probably be to old school gym class. Climbing. Climb that rope into the grid. Okay. Oh, my God. For those of you at home, read a bad situation. Let's them know the best way to do things on a six or less. Their intuitions lead them wrong. I'm going to test the rope first. Great. Tug, tug. Yeah. Seems solid.
Pretty solid. All right. I'm going to start to put my full body weight onto it. Yeah. It stays. Okay. I am going to. Oh, this is a bad idea. Oh, God. I'm such a fool for doing this. You know what? I'm going to try and climb the rope. All right. Roll. Act under pressure. I think you're having some panic thoughts about what it was like to be in elementary school and climbing the rope and the strange sensations it gave you. It's making you panic. No, nobody wins. I'm with you. I'm with you.
All right. Not Jake, though. No. That was act under pressure. You said. Yeah. I got a 10. Excellent. So you, man, hand over hand, you got your feet pushed together. You slink your way up this rope in the darkness. Nothing seems to be a problem. You got up there without issue. Am I in the grid? You are in the grid. Am I like on a like a platform or is it like a gangway or something? There is a gangway. Okay. All right. I'm going.
So there's a series of planks laid across the bars of the grid for technicians to walk across just in case anyone out there is like, what do you mean a gangway? Is there a pirate ship up in the group? I am going to follow the gangway. This is pretty high. You're going to make your way across. Again, it's dark. You still got your battery. It's still a good solid 14%. Give me another act under pressure to get across this grid and essentially to the lighting booth that's at the end of the grid.
Oh, okay. Oh, not good. Oh, not good. Not good. Oh, but man. That's sweet. Sweet experience. Oh, no. You're going to level up the second you hit the crowd. What was that role? That would be a four. You start to make your way across the grid. You feel something scuttle under one of your feet and you pull it up to try to get away and you topple sideways out of the grid. I'm going to try and grab for. Try to grab for purchase. For purchase. Roll it. Oh, God. Oh, God. It is a. Seven.
You lift your foot and you start to fall sideways. You try to reach out to grab a hold of some of the lighting instruments or some of the pipes, anything to stop you from falling. You realize that you're going to be able to catch yourself on the rope, but get tangled in it. Or you're going to be able to just barely get a hold of one of the bars enough to change your trajectory so that you fall into the seating area, which may be a little less painful.
I'm just going to go ahead and go for the rope. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. You fall and you try to get a hold of the rope. And as you go down, it starts to tangle around your arms and your legs. And you find yourself jolted to a stop, hanging upside down, swinging above the stage. And below you is one of these little shadowy creatures with glowing yellow eyes looking up at you curiously. Jake. I think I'm still just punching it. Okay. Yeah, boy. Twelve. Great.
What is your extra effect? I'm going to suffer. I'm going to suffer less harm on this one. All right. Your fist knocks it back to the ground and it starts to turn into a puddle. Hell yes. I step backwards away so that the puddle doesn't get on my shoes and I pick up my hammer. Okay. Well, that's new. Uh, whoo. What the hell? So you guys both step back and you see this little pool and this other little pool. And as you watch it, they start to move away from you.
Like the pool is just slowly dripping away. Okay. Uh, can I like set my hammer? Yeah, you can set your hammer in the pool and use the stun part of its abilities. Are you doing that? Yeah, I would like to try. I want to try and shock this shit, see if it conducts electricity. So are you setting the hammer down on it? Are you trying to hit it and stun it? Uh, I mean, I'm not, I'm not like letting go of the hammer.
I imagine like reaching out and touching the puddle with the hammer, with the head of the hammer to do what you want to do. You got to hit it. And if you're just setting the hammer down, I don't think that it's going to do damage or stun. You know what I mean? I guess kick some ass then. Okay. But flavor-wise, I don't want to think about it like taking a mighty swing. I want to think about it like reaching out and using, trying to shock it. Okay. Is that fair? Sure.
I just like the look in my head and snake eyes. Oh, good. I'm getting shocked, aren't I? So you gently start to poke your hammer towards this pool. And as you do, you realize that you've stepped further into the dark room. Oh, no. And as you touch it, the puddle comes together and reaches up and wraps around the hammer and pulls it out of your hand and starts to slide it away. I need that. I want to try to grab it.
So Jake, you lunge forward to grab a hold of the hammer as it's being pulled away. And you realize that as you're in the air, it's starting to move away faster and faster. You're just able to get your hand through the loop and grab hold of the handle, but it's pulling you. And Tass, you see Jake's feet vanish into the darkness. And then nothing. The Crit Show is a Crit Show Studios production edited and produced by Brandon Wentz with music by Jake Purley.
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