Episode 7 – Dark as the Night, Cold as the Void

Spout Lore is only made possible through the contributions of listeners like you If you would like to donate Please go to Spout Lore dot com slash money please Or patreon dot com slash Spout Lore And if you go there you'll get a bunch of bonus content too Which is nice It's good bonus content I work really fucking hard on it Gather round friends let me tell you a tale of three heroes Noble and bold A brute, a druid, and a thief Who is but nine years old You know them by name You know them by deed Their quests are famously daring So here I sit Singing to you an adventure that is worth sharing Tuck is the brute He knows not his home He loves to sing and fight Fingers have health He shifts his shape And wields a spear with great might Billy's a thief His tiny size does mask the largest heart Best in bread They may not be, but their friendship outweighs their smarts So gather round, friends, and listen close For the tale's about to start Hello, everybody, and welcome to Spout Lore.

I'm your Game Master, Sean O'Hara. Joining me, as always, playing Tacoma Dome, the barbarian, Abdul Aziz. Hello, everybody. Playing V- Correct response. God damn it. This time. You said you weren't going to say anything. I'm glad you did it. I'm glad you did it. Playing Ving, the half-elf druid, Paul Oppers. Hello, everybody. And playing Fat Billy, the halfling thief, Jessica Tai. Also, hello, everybody. We all did it. We all said hello.

That mix-up was like when- Remember when we were trying to do the previously-ons? Oh my god. Yeah. And I kept saying next time on Spout Lore. Next time on Spout Lore. And Sean and I just listened back to it the other day, and it was because you said next time, and you put it- Paul, you put it in my head. I know. I'm the dumb one. I'll take that. And then it just stuck in my head. That's so fun. And it's like, it's the same reason why I can't remember whether Brendan's name is Brendan or Brander.

Because I did that too. It's Brendan. It's Brendan. Oh, god. This is what Paul does. When last we left our heroes, they were being accosted by imps in the bog, the frozen bog of Camp Alder, an old ranger outpost abandoned and destroyed following the flooding of the drowned forest. The party decided, faced with such an eldritch abomination, that the only course of action was to continue looting. We were moving really slowly, so we thought we had time. Oh, they're slow zombies.

So the party leapt across the pond on the back of Black Spire 2, and as the imps crossed the pond to the other side, they began merging and creating a new, more aggressive body. They found inside, the cabin, a dead ranger, likely the first talon of this camp, and Ving immediately stole from him. Well, no. Hey. You stole from a body? Just accept it. You're right. You all said grave robbing so many times. We gotta rob this grave.

Ving shot a bone at the imp, which immediately integrated it into its body. And then Billy had the plan to burn the whole place down, which worked, and they escaped into the trees, after a day of traveling. The party found themselves in the Chune Wood, surrounded by the ethereal haunting music of the forest. Without supplies to speak of, Ving went out to hunt, and stumbled upon a woman that we discovered to be a bounty hunter named Nyanna.

She did not immediately reveal herself as a bounty hunter, but after a thrilling chase, a tense negotiation for peace, and then a return to the campfire, Billy was able to communicate to Tuck that Nyanna was in fact a bounty hunter, planning on turning all of you in. And we did a cool, like, everybody moves at once, sort of, very quick fight, in which Tuck dealt a tremendous amount of damage to Nyanna. Billy convinced Nyanna to make a binding fairy oath to not pursue them on pain of death.

And she said, okay, whatever you say, kid, and then left. Uh, after that, we continued on through the tune wood, making camp in a fairy ring. Uh, Billy did a little dance and made a little offering to the mushrooms of the fairy ring, who basically created a protective circle around the fanny pack, which we have had this whole time. Yeah. Uh, inside we met Morris and Perel, who have just kind of been vibing out for a little bit. Uh, we had a dinner that Tuck made using, uh, conjuration.

And a thousand chickens. And a thousand birds of varying sizes. Yeah. You call it avion de mille. A million birds? That's a great name. Uh. That's so awesome. Wow. You should learn French. That's so, yeah, man, if I saw that on a menu, I would get that for sure. A million birds? A million birds? Yes, please. Uh, excuse me. Waiter, this is like three birds. It's not enough birds. It's not enough birds. It's not enough birds.

Following that meal, Ving took his watch outside the tent, just keeping an eye on the forest and the dangers that lie within, though they were protected in the tent and protected in the fairy ring. You never know what's going to show up. And what showed up was the Gibbous Man himself. Mm-hmm. The Gibbous Man looked Ving in the face and said, so you figured it out. And that is where we find our heroes now. Figured what out? Well, who I am. The God of the Sky? And he nods.

I have to say, I'm a little disappointed. How so? I thought you would have figured it out sooner, if I'm being honest. Ving takes a ladle out of the kettle that he has over the fire and pours it into a mug. Mm-hmm. Sips a tea. Do you want some tea? I would, but, and he tips his walking stick forward and it stops just at the barrier of the fairy ring. Big deal. Big deal. Big deal. Big deal. Big deal. Big deal. Big deal. Big deal. Big deal. Big deal. Big deal. Big deal. Big deal. Big deal.

Big deal. Big deal. Big deal. Big deal. Big deal. Big deal. Big deal. Big deal. Big deal. Big deal. Big deal. Big deal. Big deal. Big deal. Big deal. Big deal. Big deal. Big deal. Big deal. Big deal. Big deal. Big deal. Big deal. Big deal. Big deal. Big deal. Big deal. Big deal. Big deal. Big deal. As the fairy light… Not before I see you! Damn it. As the fairy light crosses in front of your eyes, the gibbous man disappears. I shouldn't have said that last thing. And your watch continues.

Who has the watch where the sun comes up? Uh, can I take it? Yeah. Okay. I would also like to roll my fairy child. Oh, nice. Yeah. Six. Okay. On a six, I only get one hold. Oh, shit. For the day? For the day. I can't do anything. There's no pranks allowed today. Yeah, no wasted fairy child pranks. Billy, you go out and you're like, ah, a new day is rising. I'm so excited to see the sun. Start doing, like, my little yoga routine that no one gets to see. Special fairy yoga? Yeah.

Well, it's just Billy's stretch routine. He gets embarrassed if people see him do it. Uh, does the audience get to see it? Yeah. Oh, what does it look like? He starts off with a little bit of that, like, Tai Chi kind of movement. I think that's what it is. He does a little downward dog and touching his toes. He can touch his toes? No. Downward dog is touching his toes. And then, did you ever watch Big Comfy Coach? That's what I was thinking. The clock stretch? The clock stretch. Oh, yeah.

Dude, that's what he's saying to himself. Time for stretching time. Time for stretching time. Oh, that's great. And as you're doing your usual stretching routine, waiting for the sun to rise, a chill runs through you. And you get, like, a fraction of the warmth and a fraction of the sunlight that you're used to getting. Okay, I roll back into the sunlight. It's just cold here. Well, I guess that makes sense. We are in the frozen north, I say to myself. Uh-huh.

Did Ving, did you say anything to anybody as you, like, switched watches? No, I'll wait till everyone's up in the morning while I talk about it. Can I discern realities? Or about the cold? Yeah, yeah, you could. Eight. Okay, so you get one question. What here is not what it appears to be. Okay, so yeah, at first you're like, maybe it's just because it's cold here. Maybe it's just because it's the north and it's frozen all the time. But there is, like, a presence hanging in the air.

Where you, as this, like, extrasensory energy fairy being, feel like there was someone here. Ugh. And the mushrooms around the circle are like, they're, like, shivering. Are they cold? Are they scared? They seem scared. Oh, maybe the ones where he, like, touched his, like, staff. Like, beneath it, they're, like, kind of withered. Yeah. Little shriveled guys. Yeah, I'm inspecting my little mushroom friends. Oh. Are you scared? He was here. He was here? Yes. Who was he? The black-headed man. Oh.

He was… Was he dark as the night? Dark as the night, cold as the void. Oh. Is he gonna come back? I don't know. I'm gonna run inside, wake up Ving and Tuck. Uh, yeah, Tuck is… Tuck is also doing secret stretches. What are his secret stretches look like? What do I… What do I… What do I… What do I… What do I… What do I… What do I… What do I… What do I… What do I… What do I… What do I… What do I… What do I… Did you talk to the mushrooms? Yes.

And they said that a black-headed figure, dark as the night, cold as the void, that he made a visit. And is it who I think it is? Yeah. Come here. Hold my hand. Okay. And I'll show them what I saw last night. Oh, yeah. I hold your hand. Yeah. You see a man below average height for a man, older, 60s or 70s, short white beard, wide-brimmed black hat, black traveling clothes, and a walking stick, one blue eye, one black eye. Oh, fuck. Holy shit. Yeah. Can I discern reality?

Yeah, you can discern realities. To inspect him through the memory? Yeah. Okay, here we go. Discern realities, plus wisdom, which I have a negative one on, and that's a four, so. And that's a what? I got a four. Fuck. Oh, no. I like that he's, you know, when you're remembering a memory, it's not accurate, and that's kind of the failure there. You can't inspect somebody else's memory because they're not accurate. And then also his presence in Ving's mind would be weird. Yeah.

That's what I was thinking, too. Oh, what if he, like, the memory becomes, like, fractured? Oh. Yeah. Yeah, because in that Stalwart Sons song, the lyric on the last verse is, do not speak my name. So he, like, protects his identity a lot. So it would make sense that he would have the ability to, like, remove himself. Yeah, totally. So you don't get anything from this. This memory at all. Fuck. He said he'd be back. He didn't say when. Did he tell you anything else?

I, um, he said that he was disappointed a little bit. In what? I don't know, in us. I think he was trying to, like, you know that, like, really proud, like, God complex kind of daddy issues playing out? Oh, I thought you'd do better. I'm not mad. I'm just disappointed. Yeah, totally. Totally. I totally know what it's like to have a dad. Yeah, me too. You're talking to two people who have no frame of reference. You know, like, when your mom's like, oh, I made spaghetti again for dinner.

And you're like, oh, spaghetti again is delicious, but again. Wow. Yeah, I would hate if a nice mom cooked me a meal twice in a row. Yeah, fucking sucks having someone make you food and not want anything out of you or be mad at you for stealing it. I don't know. Wait a second. I thought the gibbous man would, like, leave us. I don't know. I've thought, like, I don't know. I feel like he's, like, way trickier. Like, he would try and convince us of something or give us a boon.

Like, try and tempt us into a deal kind of thing. I don't know. Like, I feel like he would, it would be, like, some, like, thing, like, riddly or. Well, he hasn't done anything. He's just revealed himself that he knows where we are. Yeah. Did he do anything to you? No, he tried to get in the circle, the fairy circle, and he couldn't get in.

Can we, is there a way we can, Billy, is there a way you can use lighting in a bottle to see if, like, the gibbous man fucked up Ving's mind when he talked to him? What? Because it's like he was in your head, right? He was in our thing? Yeah. Seems kind of rude. I don't know. I mean, I give you permission if you think he might have given me, told me something that wasn't there that I don't remember. What do you mean in his mind? Yeah.

Because it seems, it does seem weird that he would just show up and be like, what's up? So it's like, maybe he, like, did something to Ving, like, in that moment. Because he was also, you were communing with the whispers, right? So he was kind of in your head? Right, yeah. Because he was like, you nodded off, and then he was there. Yeah, I was, like, in a different space, kept, well, I mean, I couldn't, yeah. Yeah, what if something happened while you were, like, communing?

Yeah, if he, like, got in there or left something in there. What if there's a coin in your head now? Open your mouth. Open my mouth. And then Tuck, like, pulls Ving over to him, and he looks into his mouth, like a psychotic dentist. Okay, okay, okay, okay, okay, okay. Billy's looking deep into his throat, like, I don't see anything. Billy, use your binoculars to look into his mouth. I am going all the way in. God, God. And Morris and Perel walk in at this moment.

Get it out, get it out, get it out. Where we're leaned over Ving. Billy's got his little grubby hands in his mouth. Move your tongue to the side. All right. All right. All right. All right. All right. All right. All right. All right. All right. All right. Ving's shaking his head. I can feel it rattling. I can feel it rattling. We're all freaking out now. There's a coin in my hand. There's a coin in my hand. Turn him upside down. Turn him upside down. Shake it out of him.

He's already upside down. I'm shaking him so hard. Harder, harder, harder. Can I roll to shake the coin out of his brain? You don't have to roll to do it. No, don't feel this. Don't feel this. I got an 11. Yeah, you really shake the shit out of Ving. Ving, get it open all of your holes. Let it out. Relax. Hold on, hold on, hold on. Done. Done. What comes out of Ving? Some bird from last night. And a lot of marble cheese. Marble cheese. Like a log of melted marble cheese.

That's a lot of cheese, Ving. I really do. I love Tuck's cooking. I got to say, Perel put his hands on his solar plexus. He's like, I got to say, the same thing happened to me last night. Like, it was delicious, Tuck, for a little bit. But after that, that's too many birds, I think. It's too many birds. It's too many birds. And then Tuck is… His feelings are hurt, for sure. Because he said it's too many birds. Yeah, he said it was too many birds.

And in his head, he's like, I slaved over a hot golem for those birds. I shattered a fucking priceless sword to make that happen. Fuck. And Morris is like, so is this normal or did something happen? The Gibbous Man was here last night. What? The Gibbous Man. Yes. The one we've been looking for. Well, we think so. All right, let's get to work. Tell me everything you know. He put a coin in my head. I think he fucked me up. I think I'm on a ton of time for the evil Gibbous Man now.

I can feel it rattling around in my head. There's for sure. If there's anything we know for sure, there is for sure a coin in Ving's head. Or… You should… You should what? I'm just wondering, like, should Billy actually do lightning in a bottle to confirm if he's… If this is true. Yeah, totally. Ving, do I have permission to do lightning in a bottle to make sure there's no coins rattling around in your head? Billy says the name of the move that's on his character sheet.

Did you think of that? Ving doesn't know what Billy's talking about. He just wants his little game. Do I have permission to use lightning in a bottle? Now my charisma stat is pretty high. Pretty high. So I'm probably gonna be… I'm probably not gonna fail. I do have hot shit rolls. I trend towards hot shit rolls. Yeah. And he's holding two dinner rolls. Billy. Yeah. I give you permission to take this coin out of the jar of my head. Okay, let me take a look, Elu. Do I roll for it?

No, not on Ving. Really? Really? Yeah, I think we've talked about how you don't have to roll if it's on, like, a willing participant. Do you need anything from me? Lie down? Stand up? Squat? I am below drags. One of Perel's little looking glasses. Uh-huh. A little vanity mirror up to Ving. And we're gonna watch it together. Watch the memory of… Yeah. The Gibbous Man? Yeah. Okay. Tuck, you can squeeze in here if you want. Oh, yeah. I squeeze in between them, behind them.

And Perel, and then Morris also squeeze away. Yeah. And then Victor also. I can get a bigger mirror. Yeah. So, the way that you tried to, like, watch it through Ving with the Chamberlain rings, you realize must have been a Communion of Whispers style situation in which, like, you were seeing the Gibbous Man through Ving's spiritual lens. Mm-hmm. So, you look at it through this mirror, and you're seeing it through Ving's physical eyes. Okay.

Like, the stimulus that he was taking in while he was communing. And, oh, it's actually, it's kind of like a slideshow of both. Like, you're seeing, like, this fractured image that you saw in the Chamberlain vision. Mm-hmm. Of, like, a man in a wide hat and a cloak, but, like, kind of shattered glass. As you're trying to look at him, his shape doesn't quite take form. Oh, yeah. I like that sometimes the glass looks like it falls inward into the void of his body. Yeah. Yeah.

Like, sometimes the aspect stretches in a weird way to encompass, like, the entirety of a horizon. Mm-hmm. Yeah. And then comes back. So, then through Ving's physical eyes, what you see, and what the Gibbous Man must have actually seen. What the Gibbous Man actually appeared like in that moment is just a patch of absolutely light-sucking, day-killing, darkest night. And a globe of pure bright blue, like, on the right side of this thing's face. Uh-huh.

And that's much clearer than the fractured human aspect that you see in Ving's mind. Whoa. Just this, like, cloak of pitch-black midnight. So cool. Is there any indication that he, uh, like, suborned Ving's mind in some way? No. Okay. No, there's not. There's gotta be some way that he fucked this guy up. Morris, uh, is looking at this image of the Gibbous Man and the Gibbous Man's maybe true aspect. Mm-hmm. And he's like, I think I know what he did.

He said a handful of words, and you're all freaking the fuck out. What? Could it be? Could it be that that was his trick? Could it be the evening sky? Yes. In quite a literal way, yes, it was. Gas lit down upon me? So, I mean, if what we know about the Gibbous Man is true, it seems like he either did something that is a secret trick, or he did nothing, and that was his trick. Ugh. He's making us question our own sanity. All it took was the slightest nudge, and you're all questioning yourselves.

Right. I don't trust Ving anymore. What are you talking about? I, now I don't trust you anymore, because you don't trust Ving. Look, look. Maybe he got to you. I've never had Billy reach into my mind with his fairy fingers. I don't trust him anymore. And I don't trust you anymore, Billy. What? You, you asked me to do this. Morris, I've never trusted you. This is a trap. Morris holds up his hands. Hey, look. No one trusts anyone, okay? That's just life. The aspect ratio?

The ratio stretches to like 16 by 1 or whatever cinematic ratio, and then we all pull out guns. It's a Mexican stamp. Yeah. A tumbleweed blows through the center of the sitting room. I grab my mirror. I'm like, fine. If no one likes my cool tricks, I'm going to just go in my little hidey hole and do them myself. Billy, you don't have to go in your hidey hole. No. I want to. Look at what the gibbous man has done. Tearing us apart. Yeah. And it only took him like two hours. Oh my God. We have to.

We have to be stronger and stay together more than this. We can't let this happen. I'll never be on Nightwatch again. I see what's happening. I mean, based on what you said, we were safe in the fairy circle. Yeah. Oh, yeah. He couldn't get in. Yeah. You're all welcome. Thank you, Billy. Thank you for your fairy circle. Billy, do you know how often these pop up? How rare is a fairy circle? Billy is ignoring Vane. He's turned his back around. I know. And then Tuck realizes that he fucked up.

He goes over to Billy and he's like, okay, Billy, I shouldn't have said I didn't trust you. I obviously trust you, Billy. And it was my fault. And I reacted too quickly. And I'm sorry for that. I trust you too, Billy. I just felt that power in my head and it freaked me out. And I got scared. And sometimes when adults act scared, they say things they don't mean. Adults get scared just like little kids get scared.

And sometimes when we get scared, we force each other's mouths open and we dig around in there and we scream that there are coins inside of each other's heads. We put coins in each other's heads in our mind. I understand now. I'm sorry. Okay. I'll answer your question now. Let's Spout Lore about fairy circles because we have never talked about this before. Would you ask again? How often are they? How rare are they? Can we like hopscotch the fairy circles and use them as camp? Are you rolling?

Nope. You are. I think I was asking Billy. Yeah. And I think that you. You will tell me depending on this role. 10. Beautiful. So yeah, tell me. Within reason. Within reason. It's not like they're every two steps. You know what I mean? No. But like tell me about fairy circles. They're dependent on their environment. So if we're in like a damp forest, you're going to find them more frequently.

If we want to make sure we're kind of always safe from the gibbous man, is it possible that there are enough fairy circles that we can always make camp? Yeah. Yeah. If we can find one, like we can like go out of our way to search them out.

I would say if I had to guess that like there is kind of enough fairy circles in the forest that you would be able to camp in them, but like you would have to maybe travel a night or two without resting if you wanted to make camp specifically in a fairy circle. Because then we're not just traveling, we're traveling and searching. Yeah, exactly. Well, how far are we from the tree? I feel like we've probably like traversed half. At least. At least. At least. At least. At least. At least. At least.

At least. At least. At least. At least. At least. At least. At least. At least. At least. At least. At least.

Ask the mushrooms like that's the only way you would know where to find more because they're all connected oh cool oh it's like a mycelium kind of thing that's all the fairy circles are connected or every fairy in the circle is connected every fairy circle is connected oh cool that is cool that's sick what's the purpose of fairy circles there's not really one it's basically just like a well-trodden path for fairies so more like it's like if a lot of them tend to like linger in the same area or like come and go from the same areas that will create I don't know like a little concentration cool in the mushroom books they always talk about that it's a place where fairies gather and dance so it's like their little like barn where they have their square dance yeah totally I love that so you said they were kind of like wi-fi hot spots so is it the same thing where fairies are traveling from the fairy realm to our world yeah I guess in a way it could be like an you know for a fairy it's an open door versus a locked door cool but it could also just be a spot that they like hanging out in and dancing around oh cool I like that yeah cool so you're gonna ask the mushrooms yeah where the next one is side victor comes with me to sniff around and have a pee oh cool yeah so you don't see like victor's outside and you can't see him but you just like hear all you see is a stream of this hitting a tree don't pee on the mushrooms victor no I thought I want these two I'm sorry and then he goes back out into the trees he's starting he's starting to defer to billy quite a lot the marbles yeah oh yeah you do have the marbles right please do not do not take away marble I will go pee in the trees we use the marbles to try and keep billy in check and billy use the marbles to control the dog uh-huh uh yeah victor walks outside with you and you can he stops okay and like what do you start to growl the stink of gods is he still here no but he's think is oh and he goes out and pisses in the trees so victor can sniff out gods whoa oh gods sorry I thought you said goats I genuinely didn't think there are goats nearby and nothing I hate more than disgusting goats uh but yeah he goes and pisses in the woods okay I'll talk to the mushrooms oh quite a night quite a night it's probably a lot hey it was has he ever visited before no not here but I have I've heard stories where else where else is he frequent wherever the night sky kisses the earth he can be oh come on enough with the riddles I'm a fucking fairy I know but I'm in a human body right now and my human brain can't comprehend the riddles as easily as I can I'm a fucking fairy I'm a fucking fairy I'm a fucking fairy I'm a fucking fairy I don't okay so where what do you want to know I'm sorry little mushroom no it's fine what do you want to know I'm sorry what do you want to know oh no oh have I offended you no no not at all what do you want to know oh have I offended the mushroom I mean I think that like yes in the capricious way oh no you were like do this and he's like don't tell me what to do I'm sorry that's fine I'm used to eating shit I just eat shit every day okay now I just want to know are there any more of you between here and the heart tree I don't know I don't know I don't know I don't know I don't know one or two okay it would take us no time to get there but for you and your bigger friends it might take two sons okay be careful I will I'm really sorry that you got snippy it's okay I was scared of of the gibbous man with good reason I'll leave you some m&ms fuck yes so I sprinkled some candies and you see like little like like my psyllium shoots come up and like grab the mushroom the m&ms and pull them into the earth and they're like oh fuck yeah oh man so good whoa that's a lot yeah so much sugar I know I'm so little and you get like a general kind of like you can feel your brain like pulling in a direction so you kind of know generally where that's thanks to the mushrooms I I did offend them but my m&ms kind of like repaired our relationship exactly so they're pointing me the way yeah okay I kissed the little mushroom thank you thank you the social structure of like fairy seems to be almost identical to like eight-year-olds where it's like you piss each other off so fast and then you can make up by just giving each other m&ms instantly yeah yeah so you know that like um between you and the heart tree it's like gonna take you longer to get there if you want to camp in the rings but like a day day and a half longer okay I ask you I let you guys all know what the mushroom told me yeah we as you were talking about the mushroom I was like I don't know what the mushroom told me we were talking about the mushroom we were trying to like put the tent down and like tear down camp we're like billy we're fucking we're all doing work here okay I'm also doing work but I'm just laying on my stomach kicking my legs talking the mushroom and then I talked to vayne I'm like we gotta get him doing more chores like this is bad this is I mean but in his mind he's doing more chores than we are probably balance that out there is one way I know marbles yeah marbles the marbles control all things now I ask of you one more question one task one request please open the bag I want to be inside the bag oh so yeah before we kind of like pull the tent poles out we just hold it open for him as you're reopening the bag like a dog he's like already shoving his nose in and like scrabbling at the bottom the bag I must be in the bag and then his tail goes through and I love that we have a dog you said those exact words so many times so happy yeah so he's inside the bag now nice yeah but uh yeah so billy knows kind of the direction of the next fairy circle yeah we'll have to follow the arc of the sun get the next one cool that is cool very cool uh yeah so I think we're gonna do a unless you have anything else you want to do directly in this area maybe we should we have a little chat about what we're gonna do when we get to the heart tree yeah will there be like another sort of like court there that's a good question um that is one thing is we've kind of I assume that the party has been actively avoiding like population centers yeah do we think that there's anyone that lives around the heart tree yeah would it be like the center of their civilization do you guys think so oh so we're going to like capital city like a bunch of people live at the heart tree yeah it is the middle of the city that is the middle of the forest kind of thing okay cool that changes everything in my mind yeah I just pictured a tree there but why would that be yeah they would never leave it unprotected camera zooms in on the heart tree as it zooms out you see like it's within a court that is within like a citadel kind of thing exactly yeah and then you as you zoom out from like the citadel where you see like monks moving around and tending the trees it's like a massive sprawling city there's huge aquifers like made of wood like running around it going out into different parts of the city yeah they're running water and everything to the hardwood and I do like the rome thing where it's like there is like this this city is teeming with life it is like uh panem in the heart of the city and it's like like uh in the hunger games in the hunger games yeah there's people all over and it makes sense like all roads lead to rome because the roots of the heart tree connect all parts of the forest so everything does lead to this place so when we get to the end of this road we're doing city stuff yeah which means disguise yeah totally hell yeah breakfast restaurants probably they're probably and the marble jar is getting pretty full have to do so many good deeds because tuck to make it up to billy for being mean to him this morning dumped like 15 of them well that's not helping him either I know but we fucked up so bad come on man he saw god I told him I didn't trust him uh okay so there's a city at the center of the wood heartwood yeah I like that name yeah yeah so heartwood is this is the capital city of the elves but here between here and heartwood is a big old stretch of wood and a fairy circle that you're relying on to keep you safe from the sky can we all think of a thing that we pass by as we walk through the chune wood yeah totally you're leaping through the forest on the back of your noble tree gliders and you see uh vincey's uh um this like old elf with like long hair with like dreaded hair up in the trees with like this like little woven cedar bark harness thing that he's up top in the trees and he's like what is he doing and he's got this giant backpack with jugs on it full of jugs glass bottles hanging from everywhere he almost looks like a and he's up there and he's recording the he's gathering the tune music yeah he's like an old hippie he was like sounds of the forest and he sells these tapes of solitude to people in the city to be like oh you can't hear it because all the chune trees are gone from the city center yeah so he gets uh he takes people into like nostalgic remember what nature sounds like that sort of thing nice oh my goodness I love that I mean if you guys are just riding by I think he's recording he's just like what's up hello there morning what you got just the sounds of nature man beautiful oh it's nothing like it only two coins oh shit yeah I'll go oh what fuck yeah dude two coins but you get three for ten oh shit yeah dude we'd be losing money if we didn't get three can't afford not to I say get six yeah I gotta get six yeah how many are six 25 coins bro wait the price goes up if you get six he said one for two or three for ten yeah and then six it was 25 yeah yeah it's all going up and price the more we get to wait no if we get one bottle it's two coins it's two coins three balls is ten coins oh shit we got bamboozled so fast you were just idiots no both I and tucker am very stupid I'm so glad that that actually worked wow I can't believe it yeah why why why we stop at ten let's get 20 damn it yeah man fucking they're flying off the shelves the second I get to heartwood these things are gone baby man we gotta act fast give me everything you have do you have any with june bugs oh yeah you know it and he pulls a bottle off his back and it's it's already corked but there's a little tune beetle inside it guys you're gonna love that when the when the when the june bugs and the tune bugs get together it's like a symphony I can't wait yeah bro nothing you've never heard anything like it man um I I pull out a couple coins from my pocket to add to the pile clink ving you have all of our money how how much is it for everything for every for everything we'll we'll take three okay we'll take three one each you guys listen what kind of you pick your bottle I mean they're great they're great for holidays great for presents which holiday is coming up soon which elven holiday I forget it's been a while it's uh first light bro oh cool yeah oh man and you know you gotta get a good present for your lover for first light not you little guy you gotta get a good present I could have a lover yeah I could have a lover yeah no no idea what a lover is I love my moment I love I love my dog I love the dog you think victor can't enjoy music yeah man you can get a bottle for your dog I'll take the little uh purple bottle here you go little boy it's a small and cute thank you two coins okay thank you I'll go right off uh what what tell me what you got I've got 10 coins what billy's got 10 coins yeah tuck didn't doesn't have any coins ving took all the money from me because I keep doing stuff like this I give tuck two coins can I have two yeah thanks billy borrowing money and I put two marbles in the jar as an even trade direct bribing I give tuck the rest of my six coins oh sick six more marbles okay how many will six coins get me god I'm terrible with money six coins gets you two man okay wow dude I really appreciate all the deals you're giving me fuck yeah and I give it here you go what bottles is he giving me well he's giving these are sounds of the forest man but is there specific ones are they all the same I mean they're not all the same some of them are different sometimes I like put my hands over the holes and I kind of like you know what I mean if you touch the ball you can kind of feel it vibrate so you know what you want so I feel I touch one of the bottles yeah this one sounds like uh don't worry about a thing fuck that and then I grab another one uh uh I'm sorry I lied to you oh yeah this is awesome I'm so sorry yeah I grabbed the one that's blink what I need to my grandson recorded that one man so I grab you know what I mean I'm sorry I'm sorry I'm sorry I'm sorry I'm sorry I'm sorry I'm sorry I'm sorry the two pop punk ones yeah one of them has a little uh tune beetle in it and he's got one of his pieces of chitin has come off his head and created bangs that go across one eye great yeah my grandson loves these man man your grandson's fucking cool is fucking cool man his dad not so cool that's a lot of information about your family to tell a stranger why do you think I'm out here from talking shit about my family today everyone what about you big guy um do you have any just silence solitude silence any points at you and he goes yeah brother I like the way you think check it out and he reaches back and he pulls out a little bottle that's like long and thin here you go brother thank you the purest silence the sound of silence hello I've come to talk with you again it's not like pure silence because I mean I go out there and I record the silence and I get kind of bored so I sing a little bit but it's mostly original so you know it's kind of one of a kind sort of priceless really if you think about it sick what's your name leo man cool thanks leo yeah yeah leo short for uh I know you all have weird names yeah yeah all right well I it's short for leo yeah thanks man it means uh great cat of the morning do I mean you knew that though well I mean yeah it's been a while since I've I forgot what I meant yeah yeah yeah it's hard because it sounds a lot like which means uh dog of the do yeah there you go yeah big dewy dog so anyways five coins for the silence great here you go thank you wow it's been great doing business with you yeah how's the road to hartwood oh uh you know I'm more of a people power kind of guy so I usually just walk and I walk up here so it's not so bad takes me like a week oh wow but I don't have any of these big bros he points into the trees at all the tree gliders uh is there anything weird that we should kind of be on the lookout for or whatever on the way uh nah man it's fucking chill up here you just gotta like walk you gotta be quiet and you gotta watch out for the uh for the tree guard you know but always you gotta watch out for the tree guard tree guard oh the tree guard you guys remember being accosted by two tree glider riding guards oh there's so many gliders in the center of the forest in heartwood oh maybe we could disguise ourselves as tree guards because we have the gliders where maybe we can say that we're um like you're like dog trainers like we've trained these animals and we've come to sell them to the guard in town oh yeah I like that a lot yeah that's a good idea are you a dog trainer?

Are you guys okay with it? Ask the sugar gliders how do you feel about this plan? Clarence is like you'll have to wear a saddle again I'm sorry just for a short while sir anything for the subterfuge mission sir?

And clarence is like uh all right okay yeah I'll do it I'll do it I I don't need to my mom and dad are probably fine I don't need to worry about it I sent word to them oh oh that's great I was I sent bird to them well hopefully hopefully we get bird back but I'm just uh I'm glad that they don't think that I've been killed yeah so you're not gonna sell us though that's no oh no never no in this economy okay yeah yeah sounds good okay uh all right well you know happy trails guys bye and he's just hanging in the tree with two open bottles recording the sounds of the tune we're really lucky that guy's such a burnout or else or else he would hold on us for sure for sure for sure for sure for sure for sure for sure for sure for sure for sure for sure uh so oh wait we're doing more stuff yeah that you guys see right all right so I think it's like afternoon now should should we run into an animal or like a structure I think structure's cool yeah yeah okay the discovery is a road oh oh in the tops of the trees oh oh yeah because leo said he walks up here this must have been what he was referring to leo's like like treetop roads oh cool but other people use it too for sure yeah it's branches that are just kind of interconnected but you see like ribbons tied to branches that create boundaries of the road so you're just like the tree gliders uh slow down and are just like oh it's nice to just walk you know yeah we run and glide so much it's also nice for us because we're not like being whipped around for 12 hours a day my kidneys are sore my neck hurts so much I think I'm worse at math now yeah yeah You're even worse.

Now that we're just walking, I think we got a pretty bad deal on these jars. We were so scrambled in our heads. Wait a second. How much did you guys end up spending? I spent five coins. We spent ten coins. Yeah, we spent a full ten coins on three. Yeah. He got you. He got you back to the ten. Fuck. Fifteen coins could have bought us so many breakfasts. I mean, fifteen coins was how much your meal cost at the Husky. Fuck. Don't tell him that. No.

Don't use the H word around him when he's so excited. I told you not to bring up the H-U-S-K-Y. H-U-S-K-Y. That means marbles. So you make it to the next fairy circle in record time. And you have a relatively eventless night in the fairy circle. The mushrooms here go, oh, no, we heard. Don't worry. Come on in. And set up their little protective field. Unless there's anything specific you want to do in the tent. Morris and Perel are just kind of hanging out there.

They've been doing some work researching other magic stuff, mostly volcanoes. Although, no, they've moved on to they've moved on to making a bridge and then seeing if they can drive a little car across it. They have the little metal dwarf that you guys got. Oh, sick. Oh, the little helper one. Yeah. Yeah. So they like build a bridge out of toothpicks and tape and they're like, walk across the bridge. And he walks. And it doesn't break. And they're like. Yes.

We didn't do a watch tonight because we're all too scared of sleeping outside. Yeah. Yeah. Totally. We zipped up inside. Yeah. We are hoping that the. That the gibbous man doesn't come knocking. Yeah. Having spent all supper carving mushrooms out of woods and pine cones and sitting them around like, I don't know. Maybe that'll do. I don't know. I hope that's OK. That's a really cute idea. I'm just imbued with like, just like. Spears. Spears. Spears. Spears. Yeah.

I think the only thing that Tuck would want to do because he's like missing Black Spire after. After naming that tree glider Black Spire too. Yeah. So he wants to try and use that like pick that Ving gave him to like check in on Black Spire and see how he's doing. Yeah. Totally. Like just while he's going to sleep, he like holds on to it. And like as he's drifting off, he tries to like make a connection with him. Yeah. And see what's going on over there. So yeah. How do you. Was this.

This was a role, wasn't it? I can't remember. No, I think it's just like it's Ving's Eye of the Tiger. Eye of the Tiger. Yeah. So yeah. You. You hold on to the pick. And I like uncork one of the punk bottles that I. Yeah. Totally. I'm listening to him like Black Spire would love this. If he was here, we were able to take him on that fucking boat. That for sure would fit on. He for sure would have fit on that boat. We've rehashed this so many times. Leave it alone.

And you are brought back to, you know, different time zones. But you see. See through Black Spire's eyes. You're in what looks like a lab in the library. Whoa. And there are a bunch of librarians with goggles and clipboards and stuff kind of standing around him. Not a volcano in sight. Like they're doing some weird science. I can't even. I don't know how legitimate this information is going to be. A pseudoscience I would call it.

If you walk into a lab and you don't see a single baking soda and vinegar volcano, turn around, walk out. Yeah. Those guys are nuts. Yeah. Yeah. Getting published in Nature. Uh-huh. And he's being like prodded and he's just like. And they like somebody. The guy with sort of like the German accent. The like zoologist. Yeah. Reaches down and grabs like his paw, his front paw and picks it up. And Black Spire like holds up his paw.

And you see that some of the scales on the back of his hand have started to become like a glimmering white. Whoa. That's sick. Yeah. All the sunstone he's crunching. Oh, maybe. Tiny crunch. And I mean like the image isn't going to go away. You can just kind of watch Black Spire do his thing. I want to watch. Yeah. We all want to watch. Yeah. Are you guys doing like a Chamberlain ring? Yeah. Like shared dream watch party as you go to sleep? Yeah.

There's like a giant beanbag chair in the lounge and we're all like lying down on it together. Bing was lying with his back to tuck and then he rolled over and kind of spooned him. He was like, what you doing? Looks like you guys are in a fucking like 1970s flop house. Just like on beanbags. Yeah. Beanbags like, oh man. Vibing out to this dream. Yeah. And after a while of him being prodded and you just watching, he goes, tuck. Oh, Black Spire. Am I going fucking crazy right now? No, dude.

This is the because you gave Bing that scale of yours. He did like some spirit thing on it so I could see through your eyes. We're all here. What the fuck? What is fucking up, you guys? What is up? Holy fuck. This is amazing. Hey. This is amazing. How's the library? Oh, it's great, man. They're feeding me like hardcore crunch all the time and they're fucking poking me and it feels so good. You know how hard it is to get to an itch when your fucking scales are like two and a half inches thick?

I have an idea. Oh my God. It feels so good. That's great. What's going on with your hand? Are you eating the shiny crunch that you're finding? Well, they're feeding it to me. They're giving it to you on purpose? Yeah. I think they think that it's like. I look fucking sick how cool I look. So they want me to look even cooler. You do look fucking sick. I look fucking cool as hell because like some of my skills, like my skills are still like black for the most part.

And then some of them are white and it's fucking sick. Oh my God. He looks cute. Can you go over to a mirror so we can see you? Yeah, totally. And he like walks forward and bowls a bunch. Yeah. And also he's been speaking out loud. So he's just been screaming. Everyone's like, what the fuck is happening? Stop prodding him right now. He just walks forward and shoulders a bunch of people. Out of the way, knocks a bunch of shit over because this room is like, it looks like this.

You can see as he like looks around that it seems like this room was recently recarved a little to be like made bigger. So he's got a little bit more room to maneuver. Cool. And he goes up to a mirror that is not made for a dragon and he sticks his head and you can see his like big bulldog head and like he's got where the scale was taken away from the middle of his forehead is still blank. But he's got like a little. Pattern of white shining scales. Oh my God. On his forehead now.

Like a little tuxedo cat. Exactly. He's looking kind of like a tuxedo cat. Oh man. You look fucking sick. Dude. Isn't it fucking cool? So cute. And he opens his, he opens his mouth and like a dog smile and is like big tongue laws out. It's like shaking his head back and forth. And then that German librarian is like, the dragon seems to be very enamored with his own reflection. There's like furious scribbling from all the. He seems as if a man peering into his own soul for all eternity.

Just this burner hurts. Yeah. Maybe you are all just a black and white dog peering into eternity. Well, I really, I really am so happy to hear from you guys and I hope that you're doing okay over there. We're doing okay. We would do better if you were here. We miss you so much. I miss you guys too. It's pretty sick here.

Overall, I get to kind of do whatever I want and I get to go into the shit hole all the time and they come out and they hose me down and it's awesome and I get to eat a lot and I get to play whenever I want. That sounds fucking rad, dude. I fucking miss you bro so fucking much. I miss you too buddy. I wouldn't get to do any of this shit if it wasn't for you bros. You fucking did this for me bros. That's very sweet. We wouldn't be fucking alive did it ever work for you. I miss you too buddy.

I miss you too. I miss you too. I miss you too. I miss you too. I miss you too buddy. I miss you too buddy. I'm a fucking liar. I'm a fucking liar. You're like you're all sharing your feelings right now. And he's crying so much and his mouth is wide open and his tongue is long and you see like magma start to peak up from his throat and the librarian start freaking out. He's melting sousaphone. They're like pushing instruments and shit out of the way. Okay.

I got to, they got to poke me some more. His own reflex. Has made him so sad for some reason. Put away the shiny crunch. No more. No more of the shiny crunch. Oh, these fucking nerds are freaking out now, man. So I gotta go. I'm sorry. I'll talk to you soon. I know. You guys fucking call back whenever you want. Oh, we will, buddy. We'll see you again sometime soon. I promise. Okay. We're crying so loud that Morris is standing in his like nightcap and he's like, what the fuck?

Yeah, he's got a nightcap and a gown and a little candle on a thing. He comes into the living room and we're all bad. Keep it down in here. We're all on the beanbag chair just crying at the ceiling. I swear to God, if you don't keep it down, these little late night sleepovers, over. No more. You can't do that. This is my house and when you live in my house, you follow my rules. You're not my real dad. You're not our real dad. Don't you take that tone with me. You're just our uncle's boyfriend.

And that's what's happening. And he storms out. He storms back to their bedroom and they have a very tense conversation. Do not yell at them like that. It never goes well. They're just so disrespectful. Yeah, but they're adults and they get to make their own. Well, Billy's not an adult. Well, Billy's kind of, it's complicated, okay? And then they just sit next to each other in bed and read kind of angrily for a while. Love and lust and love and lust. Two love and lust and lust unbound.

And Perel keeps spoiling it. Keeps spoiling love unbound or lust unbound for Morris. And the next day, Ving, you would know that you're basically probably like a day and a half from Heartwood. And that is well within the range of where the tree guard would operate. So if you're going to disguise yourselves, now's the time. Ooh, maybe before we leave the tent, we put together outfits. We could ask the page. We could ask the page to make us some outfits maybe. Oh, smart. Yeah, totally.

Yeah, so we see like the page has little tiny glasses on. Yeah. And he's got, yeah, the measuring tape around his neck. Yeah. And he's at a sewing machine just making costumes. Pins in his mouth? Pins, yeah, through the paper where his mouth would be. And then through his arms. Like he's just got pins all over him now. Are we going as merchants or are we going as? He's a merchant. Okay, yeah. Yeah, I like that. I like that. I like that. I like that. Billy knit himself a little merchant shawl.

Uh-huh. Like a merchant. What does his merchant shawl look like? It's like a cloak with a hood, but it's like very, it's also got like a scarf attached to it. So he just looks like very draped. Uh-huh. Draped in woolen knit shit. Nice. Very nice. That's great. What does Ving look like? The only merchant, like the merchants that he could think of were the camels and McCall. The centaurs? The centaurs.

So he's done up like just a man centaur and he's like, oh yeah, I got the, so much, you gotta like a beautiful sugar glider. Sweetest sugar glider in the sky. God, this is hard to keep up. You put like a big fat belly underneath your shirt. Yeah, and I can hide the fanny pack in there. Oh yeah. Cause we do need to disguise you. You are the most wanted of all of us. So I give, so we fill his fake tummy with like my bag and like the fanny pack and stuff. Yeah, totally. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. You see some black back hair and I can tuck my ears into my side of my hair. Right. We are in a nice spot in that the average person because like photographs don't really exist wouldn't immediately recognize you. But anybody that's been distributed your description like guards and shit like that would definitely. Yeah. Okay. Have a higher chance of recognizing you. And people probably have seen Nathaniel. Yeah. And they were like, he's Nathaniel's son. Yeah, totally. Yeah.

But you've got, your ears are under a wig.

So perfect impenetrable disguise nice he takes a bunch of like what were you gonna put a beard we're gonna put a black face on because that's what jessica and I thought yeah that was the joke I was gonna make I held back on we're learning all right I'm just imagining being knowing that like his pale elven dathaniel like skin would give him away and holding in his hand a handful of soot from the fireplace and it's just shaking I know what I have to do I'm really I'm better than this wrong I don't know if I have the strength to do it what if I want to run for office someday I definitely shouldn't wear this on a roller coaster um okay so and tuck uh tuck gets like a fake nose from perell's disguise kit and he puts it on you yeah there we go so you look like a very different person he puts like a scar over one eye not a real one I can put it on with paint there's one way to make sure they don't recognize your face forever fuck it up uh what's tuck's disguise like tuck went the opposite direction when they said merchants and he thought of the fanciest merchant he could think of so he's all in white three-quarter length pea coat ruffly shirt uh like white like big wide pants into like these white boots like riding pants almost into riding boots and he's also wearing a riding helmet wow and he's holding like a white crop uh he's dressed like reese darby's character from this our flag means yeah it's a fancy cravat so there's a lot of like blue in it too yeah you guys uh left me unsupervised with a page for two minutes and came back and I was dressed like this holy shit billy stample's pants are so good I'm gonna wear them I'm gonna wear them all night knitting this stupid shawl he's so fancy and cool you guys look he's like why didn't anyone tell me that could be anything I wanted to be we told you a few times no yeah we tell you that all the time no no billy it's billy it's a very nice shawl honestly I probably look the most mysterious anyway so whatever look at how shawled up you are anyway perel pulls your hood up over your head and wraps your scarf around you and it does almost completely envelop billy's body it's very thick yeah and is it like you grabbed the butter moth silk that we stole so you use that in this yes okay so you have I re-knitted it yeah yeah you got you like used the parts that weren't eaten away by rotten time I thought that when we found it like well this is like the chunk that's left might be billy's yeah yeah you're a little bit disguised every time I put your hood up I'm like oh where's billy where's billy really billy and we're playing a game and then we're like holy shit actually we can't see oh my god where'd he go actually where the fuck is billy guys I'm right here oh you pathetic fools he's here you see the heat from his breath give him away victor I love it in here so many earth don't for me to camouflage your kids uh and you're all disguised up and you head out hop onto your tree gliders morrison perel give you a little salute and a handshake yeah we roll up the fanny pack does victor stay in there too victor stays inside yeah he just said he likes the earth tones yeah I will guard safeguard earth tones in here I will protect two pathetic old men I will plug my ears and let them do whatever they do they have many fights it seems open hand slapping fights it seems like many slapping voices coming from chamber um you're all uh disguised up and you pack up the fanny pack and hop on your tree gliders give a little thank you to the fanny pack and hop on your tree gliders and hop on your tree gliders give a little thank you to the mushrooms that protected you over this dark dark night I tossed the rest of my m&ms and you head off into the trees on your way to heartwood and the camera stays on the fairy ring and at the very edge you see two small withered mushrooms and that's where we'll end it for this week uh I'm your game master Sean O'Hara joining me as always playing tacoma dome the barbarian abdulaziz so long playing ving the half-elf druid Paul Oppers take care playing fat belly the halfling thief jessica tie everyone thank you so much to aaron reed for our intro and outro music if you would like to hear all of aaron's original music you can find him at aaronreed.bandcamp.com and if you want to find the music that aaron has produced for the show written by abdul and myself you can find that at soundcloud.com thank you to all of our patreon supporters around the world for supporting the show we wouldn't be able to do it if it wasn't for your help uh if you want us to support us you can get access to a whole bonus campaign set in the high spear mall art merchandise drops uh games run by abdul and myself and a whole whack of other shit so check that out at patreon.com Spout Lore or Spout Lore.com money please and uh lastly and mostly thank you to all of you for listening we'll see you next time and so ends the tale of adventures three who tried the best they can though dumb and scared and lost they be for times of rest in revelry and though our journey may be like a conclusion we will not leave you without a resolution return next week to hear some more whilst you commute or do your chores and for you I'd gladly spout more you