Patreon Bonus: Spout More Episode 23

Hi, Spoutlorians, Abdul here, just letting you know that we dropped a brand new episode of our Patreon-exclusive bonus game, Speltmore Mall Brats, over on our Patreon feed, and also dropping a little teaser here in the main feed for you guys. So if you're interested, head over to Patreon for the full episode. Links are in the show notes. I'm going to tick my clock for bigger gang army. And this is you like going to the study group and being like, we need your help.

Yeah, we need one of the other groups because we're in with these guys pretty good, right? You're not, I wouldn't say you're like super pals, but you're definitely not like hostile. We definitely think that we're closer to them than we actually are. Yeah, definitely. Some of the study groups is just like rolling eyes. Like, oh, you go down, you lock the door.

You go down to the study hall, their library, and you're speaking to a 15 year old named Father Arthur because he dresses like a priest and he has one of those wide black hats. And he's sitting at a table with like a burning candelabra on it. So you come to me for what? Well, I want to know of the other people who live in the tunnels. What of the other tunnel teens? The tunnel teens. These tunnels go far and wide around the mall. I'm trying to go deep, but it's not. It's okay.

You can just use your normal voice, buddy. I'm intimidated by all this fire and that big hat and you're dressed like a priest. Okay, fine. So if you are looking for the tunnel teens, the teens you shall find, what kind of, what do you want to know? Like kind of who's around? Well, who has the most immediate access or who can walk amongst the adults? The best. Or the most unseen or somebody who's associated with the vineyard. Anybody who has any ties with…

No one in these tunnels is associated with the vineyard. Those are the movers and shakers of the mall. The tunnels are a world unto their own. But if you are looking for folks who might be able to move about unseen, the shadow cloaks are the ones that you seek. They move about the mall with utmost stealth and are friends of the study group. And then we hear a bunch of clanging in one of the vents. And a kid falls out of a tube. Does he land like a superhero with a sword? Yeah.

He does have a sword. Yes. He lands kind of in a pile, but his sword is sticking out to the side. There's like dice go everywhere when he gets to go outside. My die. Did someone call for Rathgar the Nightblade? Whoa. Holy shit. Holy shit. Holy shit. Holy shit. Holy shit. Holy shit. Holy shit. Holy shit. Holy shit. Holy shit. Holy shit. Holy shit. Holy shit. Holy shit. Holy shit. Holy shit. Holy shit. Holy shit. Holy shit. Holy shit. Shadow Cloaks. Are you new to the group? I am not new.

I am its foremost warrior and blade. Cool, cool, cool. So what needs you from the Shadow Cloaks? We need your prowess, which is legendary among the tunnel teens. Surely you've heard of us. The Cool Treat Kids? Aye, I have. Have you heard of our plate, shadow base? What's her, what's her? Rathgar, the Night Blade. Hey, hey, Blade of Nights. Have you heard our, sorry, what did I say before? You said plight. Okay. No, this is good, this is good. Rathgar, have you heard our plight?

We need a blade in the night, a night in the day, and a day to illuminate the night that is cast by the duplicity of Tina Durger in the Wine Moms. Yes, I know this threat well. And he sits in a chair and he is by a table with a burning candle and he, kicks his boot up on one table and puts a long pipe in his mouth so his face is hidden in the cloak and bubbles start coming out of the end of the pipe.

And Fenton is so stoked that he got that whole thing out in one go that he grabs a bottle off the ground and he smashes it against the wall. He's just so amped. I did it. That was great, Fenton. Thank you. That was a very potent sentence there at the end. Oh, I just realized what the shadow cloaks are. They're not all the same. They're a, they're, they're, they're a fantasy adventuring party. Oh yeah. So this is like the ranger. This is like their leader, the Aragorn of the group.

Someone's like an elf and they've got like, you know, the quiet footsteps. Yes. The bow. The cleric and the barbarian kid. Yeah. They're a LARP group. They're like a D&D party. There's like a Council of Elrond scene that's coming up where they give us and most of them are cardboard cutouts. Okay. I love it. So what do you require from Rathgar the Nightblade of this plight of Tina Durger? I don't know. I guess we just need information.

We need somebody to be able to move in the shadows without being seen. Doth, we need safe passage through the night and tunnels. I know the shadows well. They are my allies and my friends and also my step siblings and I can give you safe passage. But what is in it for mine adventuring compatriots in the shadow cloaks? Do not work for, say, five gold pieces a day. Purse. Jingle. Oh, the coin purse that you stole from Maurice. We only have two coins, dude. I'll jingle it a lot.

But if they're actual gold coins. You know when you put like a a big piece of money in a tip jar and you throw it down really hard to make it sound like more? That's what I'm doing. But do you think they're gonna beat us up if there's only two coins and not five? Look at these guys. This guy's a blade of night. He's a shadow cloak. He's playing. Look at his shoes. Bubble, bubble, bubble. Bubbles would come out of his pipe. Yeah, you're right.

And he holds up his hand with the fingerless gloves to get you to throw the bag of coins. Fink, flink, flink. And he opens it up and he pours the two coins into his hand but sees that they're actual gold coins from like the outside world. He thought there was five Starbucks in there. He was so sick. Five Starbucks? What do we call them? Mall bucks? Mall stars? Oh my God. Spear bucks. Spear bucks. Five Starbucks gift cards. There's two bucks on each of those. There's five Americanos in this bag.

Get a frap on us, boys. I see that your coins will spend well in the food court. I will eat many pizza pies with this fresh coinage. I regret this. And he slips it into his pouch next to the chain that connects his wallet to his jeans. This is Walgoat zip because of the… He's got to zip up the puck. Oh yeah. See, it says rancid on the outside of it. So, okay. So you're gathering information. So what do you want from these guys? What do we want? What do we want?

I thought you were completing your project clock. Oh right. This was like the shadow clocks. I know, but that's toward getting more and more people. I also want… I also want… I also want… I want to impress them so that we don't have to keep paying them because I want to build prestige and build our gang so that we can just to have everybody be on our side. We could tell them like other gangs are uniting with us. Yeah, I like that a lot. Which is true.

And we are here to fight the great darkness that… Is adulthood. Yeah. These mature people think they can just step all over us because we're kids. Well, they'll see someday we'll bang together. What we need to do is be able to stand up against them. He stands up very suddenly and he pulls a sword out and he… Puts the point on the ground and kneels down and dips his head and goes, you have my blade, sire. And you have the blades of all shadow cloaks. We will come to your aid when required.

Thank you so much. I give him some weapons, candy weapons. Oh. Oh, cool. You give him a weapon. So what do you give him? I'm going to give him some lights out licorice for the shadow. Oh, yeah. Hey, this will extend your shadows beyond your normal reach. Cast shadows and move within. And it's sweet and delicious, too. It is food? Don't eat it. Okay. This is called lights out licorice. And anybody that comes in contact with their mouths will be lights out. Create a shadow in their mind.

Ah, foul sorceries. But sorceries that I shall bend to my use and the use of my comrades. Very well. You kids are warriors, I can tell, of great caliber. Aye. We are very strong and brave. For sooth, I also have a gift for you, my friend. Shadow Snout. What's his name? Shadow Snout. Rathgar the Nightblade. Rathgar. Rathgar. I also have a gift for you, Rathgar. Aye. And then I give him a grappling hook. Whoa. Holy shit. Oh, my God. Is this real? Yeah, man. I found it. That's so fucking sick.

I found it and I tried to use it. Okay. And I fell. Two stories. You what? Oh, my God. I do not have the upper body strength to use this noble knight, but clearly I can see from the progression of your teen stache that you do. Oh, yeah. He's got a ratty little teenage mustache. Yeah. Oh, my God. Valindra Starvale is going to fucking flip out when she sees this. That's great. I got to write down these names or I'm going to forget all of them. So cool. Okay. I guess we're all giving gifts now.

She says it loud. Yeah. He turns to Clover. All right. I beseech you, the Nightblade Rathgar, to accept this gift bestowed upon me or bestowed from me. Please taketh this card, which will show thy future. I push towards him one of my, what are they called? Tarot cards. Oh. And it is the knight. Oh. Ooh. He picks it up and it gleams in his eyes. Let his sword guide you through the darkness. I thank you for this boon, fair lady.

And he touches it to his forehead and he does that thing where he like puts a fist on his chest in like an old Roman style salute. And he goes, and now I must away. And he jumps up and grabs onto the tube and goes, come on, kill him. That was a date. And he gets up into the pipe and his sword hilt gets caught on the edge of the pipe. And he's trying to fall out a little bit. And then boom, boom, clang, clang, clang. And he's gone. Honestly, age that guy forward like 20 years.

He might be like one of the greatest warriors in the land. Yeah. He's starting early. If he's taking it this seriously now. Yeah. So I'm also here still, Father Arthur, Cardinal of the study group, but I assume you don't need anything from me anymore. There's a ton of work.