Episode 11 – A Snake in the Glass

Gather round friends, let me tell you a tale of three heroes, noble and bold. A brute, a druid, and a thief who is but nine years old. You know them by name, you know them by deed, their quests are famously daring. So here I sit, singing to you an adventure that is worth sharing. Tuck is the brute, he knows not his home, he loves to sing and fight. Fingers have health, he shifts his shape, and wields a spear with great might. Billy's a thief, his tiny size does mask the largest heart.

Best and brightest they may not be, but their friendship outweighs their smarts. So gather round friends, and listen close, for the tale's about to start. Shad's got hard big dick energy, it's crazy. It's crazy. Good evening, and welcome to Spout Lore. I'm your game master Sean O'Hara. Joining me as always playing Tacoma Dome, the Barbarian Abdullah Zees. Hey what's up fat daddy. Playing Ving the half elf druid Paul Oppers. Girthy game master what you got.

Playing Billy the halfling thief Jessica Tai. Hi. She's just so proud of herself. I think something to consider is that Maybe people don't want to have to hear about it. All right. Do it again. Do it again. Yeah. Good evening, everybody. And welcome to the second run through of the intro for this episode of Spout Lore, because the last one was too inappropriate, even for our standards. Joining me as always played Tacoma Dome, the barbarian Abdulaziz. You're. No.

Playing Tacoma Dome, the barbarian Abdulaziz. Hi. Hello, everybody. Here's the boring intro where we don't talk about shine. No. Playing being the half out druid, Paul Loppers. The thing is that Jessica says she. I think it's just because. We kind of believe all this out. They're playing that Billy, the halfling thief, Jessica tie. Okay. My. And also I use the smallest. All the time. Cannot get it out. It hurts to put it up. That sucks. Yeah. So what you're thinking? Yes. Absolutely happened.

Okay. Yeah. And if you want to, if you want to hear the unedited version patrons. Too bad. Also, what do you do with a period cup that you can't use on your own? You know, you prank your friends, I guess. Sell it on the black market. Yeah. Use it for crafts. I would. Okay. Yeah. Yeah. You make popsicles in it because they can turn them inside out. Are they silicone? Yeah. Oh, you can make like poached eggs. An egg can't fit in it though. Oh, God. Little guy. Oh, it's too easy.

Oh, a bunch of eggs can fit in there. This is the yolk. Yeah. Technically a bunch. Good. Jesus Christ. Okay. Here we go. Game time. When last we left our heroes, they had sprung a trap upon the famed garden snake of McCall. A fight ensued in which everybody was doing pretty well. Billy like lassoed her with a bed sheet. Ving trapped the bed sheet in the door. So she was restrained. She was trying to cut herself loose. Billy stole the knife. Tuck kicked the door off a closet.

Hit Ving who ping ponged the door into the garden snake. People were getting slapped. People were getting punched. People were getting thrown in pillowcases. People were also turning into 30 foot long King Cobras. She's a shapeshifter. She is a shapeshifter. She has what looked like a series of tattoos running down both of her arms, but are in fact the diamond pattern bands of the Cobra. Oh, that's her. Oh, her tell is, is the snake bands on her arms. Cool. Yeah. Cool.

Um, it was either going to be that I was trying to think of what her tell could be. I was like, maybe snake eyes. That's too obvious because I wanted it to be the thing where you didn't know necessarily. But if you looked her in the eye and you saw snake eyes, you'd be like, oh, she's a snake. Oh, she's either a snake or a vizier. Look into my cane. But that would be me. That's the best line in any Disney movie. Uh, yeah.

She turned into a 30 foot long King Cobra and the fight got a little bit scarier from there. Billy stabbed her through the tail. Ving held her down and then tucked through in a pillowcase. After the fight ended, we discovered that the spear that she stole from the apartment that belonged to Ving's father also belonged to her father because they are the same father. Jeez. Weez. She is Ving's half sister. Pretty cool. Cool. Family reunion. We're taking her at her word.

And when that was like being figured out, like in the middle of it, Tuck went into like Sherlock Holmes mode in his head where he was like, her father owns the spear and also his father owns the spear. And then it was like a family tree diagram that generated. And then he was like, but how can two men own the same spear? And then it's like, it started saying, it's like, maybe they're from different universes. And then he's like, maybe they're twin brothers who shared a spear.

This whole time we're talking about how we have the same dad. Yeah. You guys had already. Yeah. And then you like, can't you come to from your own like brain? You're like, oh, oh, okay. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. That makes sense. Yeah. You guys are brother and sister. Uh huh. And that conversation went on for a little bit, a little bit of detail here and there. Her mom was a merchant of some kind who used to make trips to the principalities in the great forest. She didn't say what for.

But if you think back, there's probably a thing that we've already seen. Oh, you mean the ironwood? The ironwood. Oh, that's why I've been in the elven forest to buy ironwood from the elves. Cool. And bring it back to the prince, to McCall, to build the library shelves. Cool. And okay. So things that we learned about the garden snake, her real name is Shia. She is hiding out with the Siddell family. The family that is responsible for the garden snake.

The family that is responsible for the upbringing of McCall's viziers. Uh, she is in her seventies, but she looks like she's 20, like late teens, early twenties. And she has basically just been, you know, behind palace walls kind of hiding out because they, she doesn't want to give away the fact that she's extremely long lived. Yeah. And she offered to let you guys hide out with her in her home because she found you and the jackals found you.

So it'd be pretty easy for the light guard to find you at cash. His apartment. His apartment. His apartment. His apartment. His apartment. His apartment. His apartment. Oh, and that was the other thing she told us was that the light guard hired her. Yes. To toss our place. Yeah. Basically to confirm that it was you three. Yeah. And hopefully Perel. And now they know Perel because they stole his journal. Right. Oh, fuck. Yeah. Damn. And they stole our roommate. Yeah. They kidnapped Cash.

So we've gone on a journey to go save him. Oh, yes. In preparation for this midnight clandestine meeting with the light guard to recover their friend Shia in her room. Your garden snake guys has agreed to wait on the rooftops above your meeting place with your weapons and drop them at the code word Baklava, which is not really a code word so much as a thing you all shouted as a non sequitur. And after calling out Baklava, you held your hands out waiting for your weapons to drop.

And there was a long moment where nothing happened. And that is where we find our heroes now. She fucked us. Fuck. And then your weapons drop into your hands. Ow. Do you guys want to roll? Should we be rolling to catch these weapons? Oh, yeah. Yeah. So it's all going to be dexterity. Two to six plus dexterity for everybody. Oh, hell yeah. Ten. Sick. Here we go. Seven. Okay. Nine. Okay. So Billy's the only one that succeeds outright. What did she take for Billy? Rocks? Yeah. My handful of rocks.

So they fall down like rain. And instead of catching them, I slap them. Slap them and punch them so that they ping pong off all the light guards who have cornered us. Cool. Yeah. Sick. So do I roll for that? We'll say what happens to these guys' weapons first. So on a seven to nine, partial success. I mean, I stuck out my moss hand to make it more dramatic. And it just went right through my moss hand. And so it's in your hand, but it's harder to use. Yeah. Yeah.

So you're going to have to do another defy danger if you want to actually use it. In an attack. Damn it. Yeah. Larry, Terry, and Chad. It falls most of the way and gets stuck in the wall of a building that you're next to within reach, but you might have to jump for it. Oh, fuck. What's the orientation? Where's the axe and where's Fatim? So Fatim is right there at that wall. So like what? 10 feet away. Yeah. Like 10 feet in front of us. So close. Yeah.

And then four faceless light guard mooks behind you. And then four behind Fatim. Okay. These guys look like they were pretending to be like tetherball hooligans. Oh, yeah. So they're just wearing like I heart bone crusher. Shiny shorts. Yeah. And there's a dumpster next to Billy. In my mind, I was just imagining a dumpster next to Billy. I don't know why. Cool. Yeah. And where's the axe? In the wall next to Tuck. Oh, it's just in the wall. Okay. Yeah. Yeah.

She tried to drop it towards you, like give it a little push, and it went too far. And the stone cutting axe. Chopped into the wall. That's probably why it took so long for her to get it. Because she was ready. And then she looked down. She's like, how the fuck am I going to? It's a bunch of loose rocks. An axe and a spear. And they're like, 60 feet down. I can't aim that well. This axe is so fucking heavy, too. Yeah. So that's where we are. And Billy is in a position to attack right away.

So what does Billy do? Who are you going for? All of them. I have eight rocks. You can attack one of them at a time. No. I'm slapping the rocks. Okay. Fine. You don't get a fucking area. A dude behind me. Okay. He has a big forehead. Okay. Fat forehead. Seven. Seven. Great. So on a seven and nine with volley, you take what you can get, which means that you roll your damage and then roll a D4 and subtract that. Okay. Or you have to move to get your shot and you put yourself in danger.

I'm going to take what I can get. Okay. So roll your damage. Dang it. One. One. Oh, my God. Oh, my God. Okay. And then, yeah, roll a D4. No. Wow. Wow. Oh, man. Bad luck. You roll a one on a one. Unfortunately, no damage. Wow. He has a really thick forehead, too. Yeah. So it's like bullet time. The rocks fall like rain. And it's just like slow movements as you connect with the rocks. They miss, miss, miss, hit a guy softly in the chest and it bounces right off. Dang. It just goes. My bunny hug.

He looks down at his chest and goes, huh? What was that? It's a rock. Okay. Normally, they kill people. Yeah. And yeah, they all start converging. Fatum lights up his axe. Bing, what do you do? Fight with honor roll. Enter a fight roll plus const. There we go. Twelve. And what do you get? Three hold or whatever? I get three holds. Okay. I can use them however I want. Do you want to spend any right now? Okay. I'll deal. My. Damage to a foe within my reach. Who's closest to me?

The guys behind you. Probably. Okay. I'll spear slap hand backwards. All right. One. What does this hit look like? I just kind of backhand him. Yeah. And he. I say, shut up. You a face. And you spend so much time telegraphing as you're saying, shut up at your face. When you swing, he actually just ducks his head back and you miss him. Damn it. No. Not even a glancing blow. Their training means that they have armor one. Shit. Yeah. And Fatum has more than that. Yeah. Tuck, what do you do?

Fatum starts coming. He starts stalking right towards you. Oh, no. He's like, oh, yeah. Dumpsters right next to Billy, you said. Yeah. So he wants to jump onto the dumpster, jump up and grab the axe. Oh, yeah. Bring it down on Fatum. Okay. So defy danger dexterity to do your cool acrobatics. Oh, yeah. Nine. Nice. All right. All right. So you jump up onto the dumpster, jump across the alley again, reaching out for Larry Terry and Chad. Grab it. Rip it out of the wall.

And then push away against the wall and then come down on Fatum. Okay. Roll hack and slash. 2d6 plus strength. 12. 12. Okay. I think the seven to nine is that he's going to get you. Roll 2d10. Five. Okay. Yeah. You do that. You bring your axe down and he is not terribly expecting such an acrobatic maneuver from Tuck. So you bring your axe down on him, catch him in the shoulder. Roll your damage. Oh, a one. No. Fuck. And he has your armor, right? Oh, yeah. Fuck. Yeah.

You he's he's wearing that cloak and you bring it down on his shoulder and you feel it hit something hard underneath and glance right off to the side. And as you come down, he's just holding his axe in both hands like a lacrosse stick and he bashes you right in the face with the handle. And you take five damage. Oh, whoa. Damn. Tuck. Billy, the melee is on. Ving is engaged. The foreman behind. You. Yeah. Tuck is between the others and you. What do you do?

I want to grab a rock and switch that for Fatim's axe. Wow. It's switcheroo. Makes sense. Cool. Yeah. Okay. So you pick up a rock and you just like will yourself to take the axe from his hands. Like I see Fatim smash Tuck in the face and I get really mad. I'm like, how dare he? So I pick up a rock and I chuck it and like in my throw it leaves and I catch the axe. So you don't take his full axe. What? Yeah. That's something that you've never tried it with something that someone's holding before.

But what you do get in your hand is a very slick and pungently smelly like little metal tube. And it's just in your hand and Tuck you see after a few seconds as you're kind of tussling with Fatim that the head of his axe goes out. And when I see that happen, I'm like, man, those things really don't work that well. Hey, and he's like slapping the bottom of it and just like, oh, and he gets angry. And I use the distraction to knee him in the balls. Okay. Hack and slash.

A real quick hack and slash. Yeah. Oh, holy shit. Nice. Yeah. Yeah. Roll your damage. Roll damage. Six. Whoa. That was great. Really snuck that in there. Yeah. You hit him in whatever sort of armored like he it feels like he's wearing chain under the pants that he's wearing. Yeah. He's wearing an armored cod piece, but I feel it pretty hard. Oh, yeah. And he goes like and backs up a little bit. Ving. The four guys that were behind you and Billy are basically trying to surround you.

They've got their swords out at the ready. They're doing that thing where they're slowly trying to form a circle around you within the confines of the alley. What do you do? I'm going to break free from confinement with my chi. Perfect. And get on the outside of them. Can we do something together? Yes. Can I throw you the gross thing? Yes, please. And then you use your elements to explode a bomb around them. That's fucking cool. Yeah. Great. So I'll use my.

My second chi to get out of their confinement. Yeah. Up into. I use their. Because it's cool out here. So the breath. So I jump on their breath as it's coming out of their mouth. Oh, come on. Light as a feather. Yeah. I mean, you can even do a thing where like you're kicking off their bodies. You know what I mean? Like you're jumping up, kicking off one, two, and then you're on the other side. Yeah. So you're now like outside of the ring of them. Billy throws me the canister.

I grab the rocks from the hole that tucks out. Axe made. And I launch a bunch of flaming bricks at the guys. Pretty cool. So this is going to be elemental mastery. Yes. Yeah. 2d6 plus constitution. Come on. Big blammo. Oh. Big fail. Oh. Four. No. Shit. Are you on the side with Billy or are they between you and Billy? They're between. So you still pull it off, but roll your damage. Which is d6. Three. Three. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay.

On this side of the alley. Like you try to do this cool thing. Meteor shower. But what you do is you basically like the accelerant tube is pushed along and it explodes. And they all get hit with a bunch of burning gas. And so do you and Billy. So everybody takes that damage. Dang. And Tuck, you're tussling with Fatum. You knee him in the balls. He's trying to hit you with his ax. There's a huge explosion behind you. What do you do? Wait. Do I? I don't have my ax. Do I have my ax? Yeah.

You have your ax. Oh. Oh. Oh. Okay, then I want to take TLC and then just try and cut the head off of his axe. Yeah. Hack and slash. Yeah. Six, seven, eight. Okay. Roll your damage. Ten. Jesus fucking Christ. Oh, my God. That's a huge hit. Yeah. Just tell me what this looks like. You hit him hard. I guess I just swing the axe. He's holding it kind of like two thirds and one third. I slice right through the head of the axe, and then the amethyst spike on the back slices across his face.

It catches his eye. Oh, no. Oh, shit. You swing down. It's this massive swing. It shatters the head of his axe. The spike and the mechanisms inside just burst, and he is both burnt and cut on one side of his face. Oh, fuck. And he bellows in rage. Chunky monkey. No, it's like he's not even trying to be cool. He's not even trying to be cool and tough anymore. He's just bellowing like an animal. Yeah. And the four behind him are like, uh, uh-oh. Tuck feels bad about that.

And it's at this point that you hear a noise that reminds you that there's a secondary goal here, and you hear the voice of Cash in the building to your right screaming, I'm in here. Oh, no. I'm in here. Billy and Ving, what do you do? I have tricks of the trade. Okay. Yeah. So you run up to the door that's like between. You jump up and try the handle, and it is locked. Wiggle in my stick. Nine. Plus dexterity. Eleven. Bam. Huge. You work this lock like nobody's business. So fast. Yeah.

Cash, I'm coming for you. And Ving, I assume you're following Billy? No. I guess you're fighting that crowd of people. Yeah, I've got a crowd of people now, and they're half on fire. Yeah, they're like singed. Did I? And they're pissed off. Did we take my consequence for Elementor Mastery? You go. Oh, yeah. What was your? Miss. Oh, it was a full miss? Well, yeah. I got a four or something. Oh, yeah. Yeah. Oh, something catastrophic happened. Mm-hmm.

Maybe part of the building that you're next to, like you manipulating the brickwork means that that building starts to collapse next to you. Oh, it speaks to the brickwork. Yeah. They're like, we're free. Fire Wi-Fi. Yeah. Like it's basically the building next to you is starting to crumble. Oh, my God. And that's the one Cash is in. Yeah. That is the one that Cash is in. So the building starts to come down at the end of the alley. I've really done it now. Yeah.

And Tuck, you hear this massive crash behind you as part of the wall falls down and the rest of the building starts to follow it. What do you do? Yeah. So Fatum is really mad right now. Yep. Can he see? Actually, probably not very much because, I mean, he's lost an eye and he has another one, but he also just lost an eye. So I imagine his other one's not working great. It's full of tears. Yeah.

So Tuck takes the broad side of his axe and he's just going to like fucking baseball bat Fatum in the head just to try and knock him out. Hack and slash. Seven. Roll your damage and then roll. Double 2d10. Two. Mm-hmm. And then eight. Yeah. You bash him and it's like he's so angry that he didn't notice, but he takes the shattered axe pole that he's holding and he just stabs it right into your chest. Fuck. I know.

He holds it back like he's going to throw a javelin and just jams it right into your chest. You're such a dick. Billy, you're inside a building that starts to shake around you. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Lying on the ground in an empty room. Oh my God, Billy. Billy. Yeah, it's me. What the hell? What's going on? There's a fight outside. I don't have time to explain. Let's get you out of here. Okay, fine. Yeah, okay.

Yeah, 2d6 plus dexterity. Eight. You cut cash out of it really quickly as the building rumbles around you. Yeah. And just as you cut the bonds on his wrists and legs, the doorway that you came in through collapses. Oh no. And it's just full of rubble and timbers. What do you do? Oh, escape route. Oh, escape route. Yeah. Escape route's perfect. Five, seven. Okay, so what happens on a seven and nine? Seven to nine, I can stay or go, but it costs me.

Leave something behind or take something with you. The GM will tell you what. Yeah, you're like, okay, get up, get up. Come on, we're good. What's the escape route that Billy finds? All the timber and stone that's collapsed. It still leads to the hallway, but you're basically like leaping through the timber, holding up like crumbling roof. Yeah, nice. And you're like pushing cash through it. Like go this way, move your leg this way.

And you get out of the building as Tuck is wrestling with a screaming phantom. Got an X handle sticking out of my chest. Oh no. Ving. Ving's kind of freaking out because he went in the house to go find Billy and Billy's already out there with cash and the whole thing's crumbling. Oh yeah. Where you went to go, like where you were going is all crumbled and he's like digging through the rubble. Oh no. Yeah. Oh, the thing that you left behind is Ving. It's Ving.

So yeah, Billy, you run your hand across your forehead and think about. Oh my God, my luck is so good. And then you hear Billy. As the doorway that Ving went through crumbles. Ving, you're trapped in this building that's collapsing. What do you do? That I did to myself. I'm out here. Ving, what do you do? Shit. Shit. I'll use Liza's feather to dance across the falling bricks. Okay, cool. Yeah, you see like staircases that would lead to the higher levels in the building.

But they're just like, they already broke off. Yeah, it's just like little pieces of flinder. Yeah. Falling wood. Falling wood. The roof might be the safest way to get out of here before the building collapses. Nice. Plus dexterity? Yeah, 10. 10, great. So you do it. You dance along the falling rubble. Hot, hot, hot, hot, hot, hot, hot, hot, hot.

Okay, so you see like moonlight coming in through a hole in the roof as the building's falling down and you're jumping off bricks, jumping off pieces of wood, jumping off clouds of dust that drift across the alley. And you just get to the top of this and you're a little bit, too short to grab the edge of the rooftop. I throw my spear up as like a last ditch. It's like, and I have the rope in my hand.

And the spear is snatched out of the air and you hang tight on this rope as you're lifted up to the rooftop. The face of Shia, the garden snake, peeking in through the roof. The hell are you doing in here? I'm fucking shit up. I brought the building down. I think I might've killed Billy. Oh my God, what have I done? It's fine. Just get up here. And she yanks you onto the roof. We got to go to the other building right now. We're there. She runs, jumps. You behind her. Tuck. Screaming, Fatim.

Yeah, and he just stabbed me in the chest. Yeah, really hard. I should probably run away. Right? Yeah, at this point. I'm at like five HP. Oh my God, get the fuck out of there. That might be the closest you've been to dying like ever. Yeah, pretty bad. Holy shit. I mean, we have cash. We should go. Yeah, we have cash. Yeah. Okay. We got where we came from. Okay, yeah. I'm going to try and book it. Where's Billy? He's like behind you. He brings cash out of the building.

He's like, I imagine you yell. Yeah, let's fucking get out of here. Okay. Bing sees you guys down there. He's like, guys, I'm up here. Do I have to roll the bucket? Oh, yeah, because he's going to try and stop you for sure. Oh, fuck. He's like in berserker mode. So defy danger dexterity. Okay. Okay, well, 12. Fuck, guys. So he's like reaching out at you with his bare hands, and he's just screaming and growling. And as you run away, he's like, oh, fuck.

He's tripping over himself trying to grab you. And he drags himself forward a little bit, and then he just collapses into a pile, and you're gone and away. And we lose ourselves in the crowd of people emptying out of the tetherball stadium. Yep. Yeah. Gone and away. There's great commotion. Fire people are coming. Librarians are coming to put out the fire. Exactly. Yeah, it's a huge thing that you're very easily able to get lost in, and you disappear. Good God. Where do you guys meet up?

I guess like a couple streets over. Tuck just stopped so he could pull the axe handle out of his chest. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, it just clatters to the ground. You got a gaping hole in your chest. Can I put a poultice on it? Yeah. Do you have a poultice? I got one. There you go. What does that heal? Heals seven damage. There we go. Seven? Holy shit. And that's healing that basically will come like over the next couple hours.

Like he packs it, and you start feeling less pain, and then we'll slowly heal it. And Cash is like leaning against a, like, garbage can, just panting. You need to work out more. Nothing happened to you. Nothing happened to me? Oh, my God. You got tied up, and you're laying down. Just chill. I was dragged out of my home. I had a bag thrown over my head by, who was it? Was that the light guard? Yes. What? Was this, did I do something? No. Did you guys do something? Yes. Uh-oh. Oh, no?

I wasn't going to admit to that. What'd you do? Nothing. Nothing. What did you do? It was an accident, because I see Tuck looking at me like, don't. Stop. We're going to get evicted. Oh, shit. Evicted? I was dragged out of my home. They know where I live. I can't go home. I guess you should come with us. Where? Ving's like, oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Hi, I'm Shia. She's like in her non-garden snake. Her hair's down, her veil's off, all that shit. She's like, hi, I'm Shia.

I would be happy for you to stay at my home if you promise not to tell anybody. And Cash is like, uh. He looks at the three of you. Sorry, pal. This is our only option right now. We'll make it right for you. All my stuff is in my house. It's fine. We'll get you new stuff. All my protein powder. You don't use it. I was so close to getting through one of them. Let's just go. We don't want to tell him that it was Tuck. There's mostly me eating it.

Every time he takes a teaspoon out of it, there's like six cups missing. Yeah. Yeah. And Shia takes you through. She takes you to the rich part of the lower ward. The sun is starting to come up now. And there's a really nice, beautiful park. Very well tended grounds. Even some like guards patrolling the park itself. Some people going to work. And she takes you to what looks like a. Like an old fountain works. And she takes you around the back where it's kind of obscured by a bunch of bushes.

And she goes, okay. You guys can't tell anybody about this either. Okay. Okay. Just don't tell anybody. And she takes her pinky and she pokes it into a part of the stonework and a little button presses and part of the fountain drops into the ground, revealing a staircase that goes down into the darkness. Oh, fucking sick. And the water from the top of the fountain sprays in like a huge umbrella that obscures the area surrounding the fountain as the back of the fountain works itself drops away.

Cool. Yeah. Yeah. Staircase descending into darkness. Cool. We head down there. Yeah. She takes you through what looks like a, it might've been like a smuggler's tunnel, something like that. Some sort of weird old disused secret entrance. Can I ask you a question? Like as we're walking through? Of course. Yeah. Like just why is there like all these underground tunnels? Oh, I actually heard something pretty fun about this.

So this goes to, this goes to my room, which is apparently the former, bedroom of a Sadell noble woman. And when she was young, she used to apparently use this tunnel to sneak out and meet her secret lover. Oh, cool. Yeah. So now I use it to get in and out because nobody knows that it's here. Oh, nice. Everybody just assumes it's a story. And you eventually come to another staircase that goes up to a stone, like a flagstone that she lifts up and slides to the side.

And you come out in a very beautifully appointed bedchamber. Huge four poster bed, beautiful silk sheets, many cushions, a chaise lounges, tapestries, paintings, flowers, like almost irresponsibly tall ceilings. You know what I mean? Like they're so high that her room is just got this like palatial kind of birdcage feel. Bing falls face down on the chaise lounge. Holy shit. This place is like the biggest room I've ever been inside of. Oh, this isn't the whole thing. What?

I thought this was the whole palace. Oh, no. This is just where my bed. That is. Wow. Yeah. So shy is just like, you all look beat to shit. What happened? I was kind of watching, but it was hard to see. I'm sorry, but being on the rooftop to keep an eye on you in that alleyway was not a good idea for a lot of reasons. I tried to do something out of my wheelhouse. I mean, causing a catastrophe is in my wheelhouse. It might be my wheelhouse. Yeah. There was an explosion. Oh, God. Was that you?

Yeah. I was trying to use. I was trying to use a fat. I'm a fire starter. Axe body spray. And it got out of hand. You brought down that building. Yeah. I brought down that building. That's so cool. Is it? I'm so sorry that you went through that, but it's pretty cool. How are you doing? She looks at tuck. I'm fine. Why do you ask? You're bleeding a lot. You look really pale. The poultice has come off a little bit, and there's just like a small, small pool. Oh, my God. I'm bleeding a lot of blood.

It's coming out with your heartbeat. Yeah. And I just pack it back down. I'm like, I'm fine. And what about you, little guy? Oh, I'm fine. Just, you know, just soot. I'm pretty used to that, though. Oh, this is just dirt. You're okay besides that? I think so. I mean, all my hands. She puts her hands on her hips. You want to take a bath? No. Oh. No. Oh, you're not a bath kind of? I seize up. And I'm like, no. Ving and Tucker, like, put their fingers across the throat. Like, no, no, no, no.

We don't use the B word. I just thought that I have, like, a really nice bathtub with, like, a lot of oils. And, like, soaps. No. Wow. Soap. Okay. All right. Okay. You don't have to take a bath. Please don't make me. Please don't make. I look at Tuck and Ving. Please don't make me. You don't have to. I'll take you up on that bath. Yeah. Okay. I'm glad somebody will. He pulls, like, soaps, eps and salts out of his flaps. You brought those to a fight? I bring these everywhere.

She basically has her own wing. That's cool. Of one of the buildings on the, one of the several buildings on the Siddal grounds. Wow. So we'll do a quick, she gives you a little tour of her wing of the building. So I want each of you to establish, like, a room that you come into, basically. Starting with Abdul. There's an indoor tennis court. But tennis isn't the same thing that it is in our world. Yeah. Tennis is actually. Highlight in this universe. So it's like. It's just another sport.

It's highlight. It's basically highlight. You wear a scoop on your arm and you whip a ball back and forth. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. She's like, yeah, this is where I get, you know, some exercise doing what I do. It's good to keep my cardio up. Keep my agility up. Hand-eye coordination. I mostly do it by myself because nobody comes in here, but it's pretty fun. Hey, we're not nobody. Oh, my God. We should play. Okay. Yeah. No, we'll do that. We'll do. Should we do it? No, we'll finish the tour.

I'm getting the vibe. Not now. Not now. Okay. That's fine. That's fine. That's fine. And she takes you to the next room. It's a beautiful solarium full of plants. Wow. So many plants. Crystal clear glass, but it's really high up. So it's like bouncing refracted light down from other places. Yeah. There's a little offshoot with sunstone. That's like a nursery for plants. There's growing cuttings and stuff under the sunstone light. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

There's tons of tropical plants and medicinal plants and lots of cool, like really old. Some of these and things just like, I've never seen this. I've heard that they exist, but I can't find them in the wild. He's going around. So impressed with all that. That's awesome. Crazy plants. And I would like to spend some time here and make some poultices and herbs out of this because I just ran out. Yeah, that's great.

So that'll allow you to basically refill three uses or whatever as you're resting here. And she walks by like some. She takes you to the cuttings zone. She takes you to the cuttings zone where there's a lot of medicinal and like poisonous herbs and stuff like that. She was like, yeah, this is actually pretty cool. I've had a lot of time to read about stuff and study. And I use some of these to make it so my venom isn't lethal. We got to scale back. Oh, wow. Yeah. Like I take them. I meditate.

I go in and out of my form. And now my venom is non-lethal. That's so cool. That is very cool. It's pretty cool, right? It's a paralytic now. Wow. I think that's so cool. Do you use poison as a thief? I used to. When I. I. I. Yeah. Sometimes. Do you want more poison? Yes. Okay, cool.

So I will actually for Jessica, for your sake, what I will say is that because you don't have poisoner, that just means that whenever you use a poison, if you fuck up a role, you're potentially going to poison yourself. It sounds about right. Yeah. Oh, shit. Yeah. Because poisoner meant like as long as he used it once, he was safe from it. Right. Yeah. But not anymore. So it's all going to be like that situation in a little. Yeah. Pretty much. Or she's like, oh. What?

I could give you some of my venom. I look at Ving and I'm like, can I? I mean, if you want to milk her for her venom. I'll milk myself. Thank you very much. I do not need to be milked. And we move on to the next room, Jessica. Oh, it's like a covered patio ish that you just walk out onto. And it's like an outdoor reading area. And there is her pet. Oh. Can I give her a pet? Yeah, totally. Okay. What's her pet? Any ideas? I kind of want it to be like exotic. I want. Okay. Yeah.

Like one of those northern wolves, like from the northern. Timberwolf? Whatever you're from. Arctic wolf. Yeah, an arctic wolf. You know. Really big. It's really big and silver white. Blue eyes. Oh, man. Fluffy baby. Look at this guy. Like maybe. I mean, because I like an animal, but big. It's like, you know, four, five feet off the ground. It's a horse at the shoulder. Oh, my God. Like a pony. Yeah. Princess Mononoke. Oh, my God. You have a huge bear. No, he's not a bear. He's. Oh, it's in it.

What's a good name for a wolf? Oh, Wolfenstein. Half wolf. Half R.L. Stein. Slippers. Slippers is pretty cute. Yeah, sure. Slippers. Slippers three. Yeah. Yeah. She's had three wolves. Or three pets named Slippers. Slippers the third. Yeah. No, she's not a bear. And she runs up and starts like ruffling the sides of the wolves. Who's one of my slippers? Yeah. This is Slippers three. She's a cutie pie. I run over. She's cute. Yeah, she's nice. She's really nice. Wow. So big. Can I pet you?

She's just like. Thank you. Wow. So soft. Thick fur. Your hands just sink into it. Oh, Billy puts his face in the fur. Yeah, she's pretty great. She's really my only. She's pretty great. She's really nice to have around. She's so soft and comfortable. I lean over to Ving. I'm like, I think your sister's really lonely. No, that's not my sister. Oh, her. Oh, yeah. Sorry. Oh, right. You can talk to animals. You're going to talk to this wolf. Yeah.

Ving goes up to the wolf and lays down for a minute and exposes his belly to her doing great shit. Yes, you show me the proper deference. She bows low to the ground. You are a great tundra wolf. Thank you. I have roamed far from home to this sweltering prison. No, no, no. This sweltering land. But I am treated kindly by this young girl. How far you have found yourself upon these shores. I have. I know not how far. I crossed the ocean as a pup. And here I am. Many years later. You are gracious.

You are gracious to keep guard with this woman. I would protect her with my life. And I would too. For she is my half sister. And that makes you my pet. My half pet. Who's my slippers? You're my slippers. And she goes, I am. I am your slippers. And she scratches my head. Yes. Nugget, nugget, nugget, nugget. Kiss, kiss, kiss, kiss, kiss. And Shia is just watching you go like. And her go. And now you're rolling around on the ground. I want to blow her a kiss, but make it like an ice kiss.

And she closes her eyes and her fur ruffles as she feels the icy winds of her homeland for the first time. Yeah. We are of the same place. She breathes deeply. And she is at peace. And she dies. Bing is re-traumatized. No, she's just having a great time. She loves you. And she and Shia is. Like, I knew it. I knew she would like you. I knew she would like you. She explains this to you. She's like, yeah, so the Siddels let me stay here. I just kind of keep to myself.

They bring me food every once in a while. I can ask for it. But they just make sure that nobody comes in here. And nobody knows that I live here. So the Siddels keep her inside their compound, which nobody else has access to. The Siddels are one of the richest and probably the most politically influential families in McCall. Probably on the continent. Probably, yeah, on this side of the world, for sure. What are they getting out of this arrangement? Yeah, why do they let you live here?

Like I said, my mom was a family friend. And she really helped them out. There needs to be more information than just that. Why? Because, like, that's all. Like, look at this. What kind of favor are we talking? Because fucking people suck, man. Like, I went to the soup kitchen last week. And, like, just because I had four helpings, they wouldn't give me a fifth. And it's like, it's soup. It's not that expensive. It's expensive. Like, how come I can't have soup?

You know, people aren't nice enough to give me soup. But they're nice enough to give you a castle. Like, there must be a reason. I see what you mean. Yeah, Billy's kind of starting to grasp the wealth disparity. Yeah. Are you hungry? Finally. Like, no one ever asks. And Cash is like, Billy, we ask all the time. Not enough. Not enough. And, yeah, so we're going to definitely get some food for Billy. But first, you were asking her, why do the Siddles care about you? What's the favor?

What did your mom do for them? Yeah. So, okay. Well, from what I understand, like, 70-something years ago, the Siddles had a kid who was being threatened in some way by somebody. Like, there was, like, some big thing. And the kid was, like, basically on the fucking chopping block. You know what I mean? There were people that were gunning for this kid. And my mom used her connections to help smuggle the kid out of the city and off the continent.

And then the kid later came back to McCall and took his place as vizier. Cool. Yeah. So she smuggled a vizier out. And it was, like, a huge deal. And because of that, she was a really close member of the family. And when I was born, they just, like, accepted. They loved me. Like, they loved her. And then my mom died, like, 50 years ago. And now I'm still here. I think Tuck's pissed about this. What? Why? Because he's just, like, I fucking spent years. Like, this is what's going through his head.

He's just, like, I was on the fucking street for years. And it's just, like, your mom saves one person and you can eat every night. This is bullshit. He doesn't. I don't think. She doesn't say that out loud. He thinks this, but he's just, like, what the fuck is going on? Yeah. You hear a vase shatter in the background. Everybody whips around. Tuck has nonchalantly just pushed a vase off a table. What? He's acting out a little bit. Don't worry about it. It's not even mine. I didn't put it there.

Great. Yeah. Tuck, you're bleeding a lot. I'm fine. Oh, yeah. Do you want me to take care of that? I get hurt sometimes on the job. So I'd be happy to sew you up. Sure. Yeah. That would be great. Okay. Let's go back to. To the bedroom, I guess. Wait a second. Everybody. Oh. Everybody come back to the bedroom. I wasn't sure if it was one of the bedroom memories that would be happening. No. Isn't your. No. What? Absolutely not. Anyways. So, yeah. Yeah. Please. Please sew me up.

I'm bleeding fucking so much. Yeah. You look back at the trail we've walked through, and it looks like a fucking. Slip and slide. There's so much blood, like more than tuck thought he had. Yeah. He's been touching so many things. You can see all of the things that he has broken as they've walked through her wing of this palace where it's like, oh, yeah, he's like fucked up all of those paintings and smashed so many things. Yeah.

You could see there is like a chest of drawers that he was handling a lot. So. He did something to that. He's got a lot of handprints. All the drawers are closed, weirdly enough. And as you're walking through, she's like, don't worry, I'll get somebody to clean this up. Good. And cut to the bedroom. Billy has gotten some food. What did Billy get from the kitchens? She looks like she's like vegan or something. So I just have like some dragon fruit. Nice. Yeah. Yeah. What's being doing?

He's sampling some of the edibles. Edibles from the solarium and his poultices. Nice. Oh, yeah. Bing is going to make some poultices. Great. And Shia has put Tuck in. He's on a chaise lounge because it's the only thing wide enough for him to fit on. Cool. And she's like kind of kneeling on the chaise lounge next to you, kind of leaned over your chest, and she's sewing up the hole. Maybe because Tuck is so like wide. Yeah. He's too high for her to like kneel down or sit down.

So she's like crouched on his chest. Yeah. Yeah. Like sewing him up. Yeah. You know what? Sitting cross legs. Yeah. You know what? She starts standing next to you and she's trying. She's like, you know what? And she just like climbs up on top of you. Basically. Bing's eyes narrow a little bit. And is kneeling. And she's got her knees on your chest, basically. And she's just so she starts sewing up the hole with like a hook needle. Yeah.

And as she's doing that, when Bing's eyes narrow, like I turned to Bing and I'm just I stick my tongue out and I like wink like this. It makes me look like a pig. Like a little emoji face. And Shia's like, try not to try not to move. I'm not moving. I could feel the muscles in your torso tense. Just don't move. Tuck is making faces and Billy's watching this happen. He's just shaking his head really slowly. Billy. Sorry. No. What's Billy doing?

Oh, I'm literally like I'm kind of just edging closer, like because I like Shia a lot. So I'm like trying to like I'm just laying nearby eating the fruit. Just laying nearby. Billy's climbed up on the chair. The chest. Yeah. She's got a bowl of warm water on your shoulder with like bloody rags in it. And she's just. Yeah. She started Sonia up and she's working the like hook and gut through your through the wound, slowly sewing it up. So, yeah, you're from a call, right? Yeah.

I'm from the sticks, actually. Well, whoa. Really? Yeah. Whoa. But you're so you still seem like somebody that'd be from the sticks. What the fuck is that supposed to be? I don't know. I don't know. You just seem kind of like clean. No, I wasn't going to say clean. I just mean, you seem like self-assured. A lot of people in the sticks seem kind of like beaten down, you know? Yeah. It's a real problem. That's what happens when like three families have all of the money. Yeah. Yep.

Do you ever get out into the sticks at night? Wink. You just steal from people up in the upper ward. No. What? Rifle through their apartments. Okay. All right. I see where you're coming from. But it was a job. I've got a reputation. It wasn't personal. It was just business. Sure. Yeah. I swear. I usually steal like nicer stuff. I mean, no, not nicer stuff, but just like better. Oh, my God. Valuable. Yeah. Yeah. Valuable stuff. Monetary value. Okay. But okay. Not just monetary value.

It's really fun. To steal something to like make a point. You know, that's really fun. Like one time I went into the house of this guy that owns a bunch of theaters and I replaced all of his like antique like scripts with a bunch of books that I wrote and they were pretty funny and he was pretty pissed about that. I just threw him out. I like Tuck is there's like so much going on. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

This is everything that is wrong with McCall, where it's like some fucking entitled girl has been provided for her entire life, fucking steals and thinks it's funny. And I literally spent years of my life stealing to live. Yeah. While she was doing this. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I don't. This is just like Tuck wants to be like fucking jokey and nice and stuff. And it's like being sister, but like fucking mad. It's weird. This is weird for him. Totally. Yeah. Tuck did say all this.

Oh, you just like confronted her about. Oh, yeah. She's she just like gets down off of you with like the gut with the hook on it. Just like hanging down on your chest a little bit. She's like, I. This is like. I didn't choose this life. You know. You understand that, right? Like, I didn't choose to live here. I didn't choose to have more. You choose to go out and take every night. Why would? No, that's not the point. That's not the point. The point is not to.

No, the point is not to, like, take it from the people that have it and give it to the people that need it. It's to take it from the people that have it and to tell them nobody needs it. That's it, right? Like. Yeah. Nobody needs it. Next time. You're in the fucking sticks. Maybe stop and look around. Maybe watch the kids. Look, I know. I bet. No. No. I bet you think this conversation is going to be like, you show me. You reveal the error of my ways.

And after 65 years of doing this, I'm going to have this revelation. Fuck. Why would I think that? Like, McCall's been like this for hundreds of years. People like you don't change. Like me. And then Tuck's just like. Get off of me. I'm already off of you. I established that already. You just want to bleed all over my room. Yeah. I'll fucking bleed all over whatever I want. Or do you not want my poor blood touching your rich stuff? No. Look. Tuck just starts walking away. Tuck.

No, no, no, no, no. You know what? You stay. You stay. I'm going to go. Okay. I'm going to go. I'm going to go. I'm leaving the room. We're all going to go. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. I'm leaving the room first. Okay. Hold on. Stop. Hold on. Hold on. Tuck was just going to the tennis court. Bing. I. Look. Come on. I'm not. I'm not as upset with. You understand. He came from the streets. I know. He's lived the struggle. You're on the other side.

He can't know what it's like and you can't know what he's gone through. I guess I just don't. I can't. I don't understand how I can look at somebody like that. Somebody that just has so much physical power and be like. Well, you know, he didn't get what he wanted and that's a real shame. It's not about the physicality. He's in survival mode. He's been in survival mode since he was a baby kid. You know what that does to a person? Turns them huge and soft at the same time. I guess. Sorry.

I don't know how to cut this scene. That's so fucking funny. Don't cut that scene. It's very funny. I just feel like there's a huge. There's a huge gaping wound in your life and you're filling it with other people's stuff. I guess. But like you got this kid. You got Billy. Look at him. He's like the size of like a. I don't even know. Like a big loaf of bread. And he can do whatever he wants. He's quick. He's fast. He's smart. He's got instinct. That's not always. That's not really true.

What do you mean? I'm a lot older than you think I am. And I've seen a lot more than you could imagine. There's a lot more. There's a lot more to a lot of things. I can show you. What do you. Show me what? Just what it's like out there when you don't have anything. Here. Grab Shia's hand. Oh. Okay. So I have Chamberlain's ring. And I'm going to do the thing where, you know, like with Chamberlain's ring, how I was able to get like Tuck and Ving to like see my memories. Yeah.

I'm going to do that with her. Mm-hmm. I don't know if I roll for it or not. No, I don't think you need to. Okay. Yeah. And then I lead her over to Tuck. Did you go to the tennis court? Tuck just went on the balcony. Okay. He just needed air. Yeah. He's really in it right now. Yeah. She's back. He brought him back to this raw child. Yeah. So yeah, she has a balcony that faces into the ground. So she doesn't have anything that faces out.

So you're looking at like other wings of the buildings and it's just fucking. It's like an enormous like this grounds. These grounds might as well be as big as the area that Tuck covered as a child. It's like the Vatican. Yeah, totally. And he's like, he's got, he took his ax off his bag. He's just like smashing random stuff. And it's like not making him feel any better because he knows it doesn't fucking matter. It's a penis of a fountain. Oh my God.

And then he feels bad about that because it was like weirdly mutilative. So he just smashes the rest of it around his murderous phone. Uh-huh. Hey, Tuck. Can you stop smashing stuff? You always tell me I can't just break things. Yeah. Okay. I'll stop smashing stuff. Okay. Do you have Chamberlain's ring? Yeah. And he like lifts his hand up. Okay. So I put mine on. Here, hold my hand. Okay. Um, Sean, I'm just going to show you what Tuck's talking about. I don't, sorry.

Show me what I don't understand. Just like close your eyes and hold my hand. Okay. All right. All right. I like visually that they're kind of played out like stained glass. Yeah. Oh yeah. Like the rings. Yeah. It's in the same sort of motif. That's really cool. So what's a memory that she sees of Billy's? Um, they're really early memories.

Um, it's Billy like after first, Bill, the first one after he dies and I'm like kicked out of the barn where I lived and I loved that barn and it was like so warm, so full of hay and there's like chickens and stuff that I could cuddle up next to. Um, and I had to go sleep in the fields and woods behind the village and I would be hungry. So I'd like eat whatever I could find in the ground. So I was always hungry and I was sad and I would watch kids at school play and I could never play with them.

And that went on for like decades. And then I'm going to show her some of Tuck's memories. This is a pretty bad one. Okay. Uh, so when, uh, like when we started the game, like we were like, Billy reminds me of someone I couldn't save and that was my dog. Oh, and it was like after he's been on the street for a year, like Bruce died and then like he found a dog like a few weeks later and the dog just followed him around. And then like it wasn't anything big, like you just didn't have a home.

He was on the street all the time. There's a lot of cards. Yeah. There's a lot of cards and like, like Tuck darted across the street. You look back and dog was dead. Shit. I go back to a memory of like, um, one of the, uh, harvest feasts and Billy wasn't allowed to go, but it was a ton of food, like tables of food. And when they're all done to make sure Billy couldn't get any, they burned it and Billy just like would watch. Fuck. There's a ton of books. There's a ton of books.

There's a ton of books. He has his locket, right? That's not the locket that he was actually found with. He tells everyone that it was the locket he was found with. But Tuck was cornered by Fatim. And Fatim stole it. And he threw it off the cliff. Into the lower ward. And when Tuck went down there to look for it, the light guard came down on him hard. Shit. So the one he has right now is one that he stole from a rich person. And put random pictures in.

He can't even remember the pictures that were in the original one. Wow, that's so fucking sad. Yeah. And you briefly get rendered in that stained glass a memory of Shia's. That is her as a young child, probably 11. She looks like she's 11 or 12. But as you see her… You see her at this age, you get glimpses of her mother aging. And Shia staying the same age. And her mother's eventually like bent and old and dies. And then you get an image of her in her room that looks a lot like this room.

Maybe less richly appointed at the time. And she's alone. She just sits on the bed. And then eventually she gets up. She picks up a vase and she smashes it on the ground. Somebody comes in, wordlessly cleans it up and leaves. She's alone for a bit longer. She pushes over a bookcase. Somebody comes in. Wordlessly cleans it up and leaves. And then there's just an image of her laying on her bed. Buried in it. This child buried in a massive sea of comfort. Miserable.