Patreon Bonus: Mall Brats Season 2

Hi, Spoutlorians. Abdul here. Just letting you know that we dropped a brand new episode of our Patreon-exclusive bonus game, Speltmore Mall Brats, over on our Patreon feed, and also dropping a little teaser here in the main feed for you guys. So if you're interested, head over to Patreon for the full episode. Links are in the show notes. When Franklin returns to the mall, what do we find? How do we see him? He has a very faint, blonde, long, scrangly mustache.

You know, he's not shaving because he thinks that'll help. But it's just, it's not great. No, it's not. But also a little bit of a goatee. So he looks like a really old lady's facial hair. I do like the idea that when you come back into the mall for the first time, like the sliding. Doors at the front open. And then it's just like, ooh, ah, sexy baller dude. It's like close-up shots on all of these. They were also getting a delivery of dry ice at the time.

Something going on with these flashing lights flashing around like that. They shouldn't do that. These lights are definitely broken, kid. You got to get out of here. I'm just going to practice my electric drum kit here. And everyone slowly turns in slow motion. And you walk in. No, watch out for that box of lasers over there. That box of lasers. Don't knock over my box of lasers. My laser collection. He knocked it over. Tumble tumble lasers. I like that they're just already lit lasers.

And they had breathing holes in the box for the lasers. It's the worst glow worms. Yeah, beautiful. Beautiful. Oh, it's a worm that gives off a little beam of light. Yeah, it's like the glow worms or whatever. Laser worms. Laser worms. Oh, wow. So I'm imagining. I'm imagining that he's got his like, bwop bwop coming through the doors of the mall. Everyone's like, oh my God, it's Franklin Stein. Oh, you know what? We could be leaving the doctor's office and then see Franklin coming in. Coming in.

Yeah, we see that. Oh, yeah, totally. Yeah. And like all the lasers and the fog machines and the air conditioner being like fixed and blowing around. All the kids are like running up to the balcony around the top layer of the mall. Oh, yeah. Like, who is it? Oh, and Mindy's there and she sees you for the first time. Oh, my God. Stop the press. Who is that? All right, let's do it. Let's do it. Yeah. Okay. So, yeah, Fenton and Clover, what you're leaving, I assume now. Yes.

And you hear like a commotion down the hallway near the entrance. There are kids like running up to the edge of the balcony because Dr. Hooks is on the second level. Yes. Yeah. So there are kids rushing to the edge and you see lasers and hear music. Oh, I passed the ice cream truck. Oh, shit. Let's go. I'll race you. I'll race you. And then Fenton pushes Clover. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. And she smashes into the escalator. And she's now being carried down the escalator. Oh, no.

And then, yeah, Fenton tries a Phantom of the Opera descent from the second floor. Sliding down the middle of the escalator. Yeah. Classic. And you both arrive at the bottom of the escalator, Clover in a heap on the stairs and Fenton rolling down the center after a failed Phantom of the Opera descent. I tried to slide, but I was running low. There's a woman. There's a woman. And they can never shut them off. So all the wind that built up overnight. There's papers blowing out of the street.

People running around going, Party store's next door. All the confetti. 40 party cannons going off at once. Dry ice, lasers. The magician just arrived and he was all caught up with the dry ice and he crashed his truck out front, his car out front. All these doves are flying in above his head. Yeah, we look up and we see Franklin in slow motion.

He's nervous and he's walking in slow motion and he's got a shaved head and he kind of whips his head around as a dove flies up and you see that he's got a long, curly, blonde rat tail. Oh no. Oh my god. So elegant, like a horse. And then in Fenton's Sherlock Holmes overlay you see a word that says, Franklin's fucking hot now. Like scratched into the sky. And then more words show up and it says, move over, a lantern. There's a new boy in town and he's serving up dinner for Fenton Beasley.

All the R's are backwards. I hope that there's blood in that dinner because I'm a vampire. His Sherlock Holmes overlay puts everything in slow-mo. It takes so long that it's basically normal time. It has to like pan over. To read. Away from the thing he's looking at. It's like a poorly produced typography music video where it's just like everything is on top of each other. Can't even read it anymore. What do you do? I run up and grab them in my arms and hug them. Oh my god, you're back!

I'm back! It's like being whole again. You're so tall. Really? You think I've grown? Yeah, you have a beard now. Oh my god. Stop. Thank you very much. Look at your mustache. Oh yeah. It's blowing in the wind. All of the adults are looking at it like, oh my god. He's wearing cargo overalls with one of the straps undone and ballet combat boots. Like silk lace. You look amazing, Franklin. Borbo's gonna be jealous. Where is Borbo? He's touring. He's on tour right now. What?

He went, I don't know, like the Panusian folk festival. Circuit. The Panusian folk festival circuit. There's one folk festival every three days in Panusia. He's that burning elf. He sent us a letter. He said it was like a meat grinder out there. I don't know if that's good or not. I think that's pretty good. We know how much he likes meat. It's so good to see you guys. I have so many stories that I'm gonna keep to myself that I will never share my trauma with you.

I too have so many stories that I will just keep in my head. And Fantin is like, Franklin, I have a terrible truth to share with you. I have turned fully into a vampire now. Oh, and Franklin's like, oh no. Yeah, and Clover's behind Fantin like just shaking her head like. I have been extracting the delicious sanguine sustenance of blood from many things and Clover has been helping me. She is my familiar now. And Clover's like, yeah, totally. And she's shaking her head.

I drink the blood of carrots and broccolis. Oh, yes. Good. And he's like nodding back like, good job. The red, red blood of cheese and macaroni. Like, wouldn't you know, every blood is red from everything. And the delicious red, red blood of prunes when I am stopped up from all the cheese blood. Yeah, I want to present a gift. Some leather bat wings that he made for Fantin while he was at military camp. Out of all like military surplus old leather. And Fantin is speechless.

He's because they're like so much better than all of the paper mache bat wings that he's been trying to use to fly. He puts them on and it's a little leather jacket, but the arms are connected to the waist. So he's just like, oh, I'm going to die. I'm going to die. I'm going to die. I'm going to die. I'm going to die. I'm going to die. I'm going to die. I'm going to die. I'm going to die. I'm going to die. I'm going to die. I'm going to die.

Vampire and there's so many zippers on this jacket there's zippers like mid wing all over the place so many zippers so many places for me to hide things I love it and he goes I love it and then he goes you are also allowed to be one of my familiars frankly thank you and Clover I got you these I made them out of all the soda tabs and he made a bunch of like snap on earrings and eye rings and nose rings and all different rings and studs and everything so a bunch of fake piercings if you want thank you Franklin you're welcome she starts like attaching them all down her like eyebrows and like around her lip and just anywhere that it'll hang even like her hair amazing thank you whoa Franklin as you're so as the kids are heading back towards Candyland you kind of your eyes are drawn to the balcony above you where you see looking down gripping a handful of flyers Mindy cart I reach up to one of the flyers that's hanging next to me and I rip off one of the numbers I read it so it's a drawing of a bunch of kids being happy and a bunch of slightly larger kids above them looking caring and the thing says babysitters club got a baby need it sat call us now we're all qualified and we have all of our licenses and we have a lot of experience looking after and they ran out of space so that's where it ends and underneath it has how do people call each other in the mall give like an address oh yeah it's like yes door front that you rip off yeah or maybe oh maybe this is the tubes so you guys had tubes that you yelled into that like the kids understood but I think over the summer a new business venture has installed communications tubes across the mall oh yeah remember in like we had the elf tubes yeah Nortel oh right you can it's like you put a thing in the elf takes a message to somebody yeah that caught on one of the kids was like a startup yeah yeah so yeah it says call us tube 771 you just yell that into the tube and an elf takes it that's what it says on the piece of paper yeah listen to it too so then you look up and you see Mindy looking down at you with her with her flyers in her hand and a hand from out of sight from behind her lands on her shoulder oh can it can to put a leather jacket around yeah a letterman jacket jacket you see on her hand that she's got a sports ring yes what's a sports ring her new his championship yeah from her new boyfriend a land Tim whoa shit fucking shit fuck this just saying I grind right I kind of worked I heard it no I know but that absolutely drove me insane you hear the sound of Franklin's teeth grinding a woman