Tag: Spout Lore

If you like what you're listening to, then you're going to love patron.com slash Spout Lore where you can be part of our You want to say any of the right words? What? You said patron.com patron.com If you want to support us in our stonk pursuits, I'm so sorry. Gather round, friends, let me tell you a tale of three heroes, noble and bold. A brute, a druid, and a thief who is but nine years old. You know them by name, you know them by deed. Their quests are famously daring.

So here I sit, singing to you an adventure that is worth sharing. Tuck is the brute, he knows not his home, he loves to sing and fight. Fingers have health, he shifts his shape and wields a spear with great might. Billy's a thief, his tiny size does mask the largest heart. Best and brightest they may not be, but their friendship outweighs their smarts. So gather round, friends, and listen close for the tale's about to start. Hello, everybody, and welcome to Spout Lore.

I'm your game master, Sean O'Hara. Joining me as always, playing Tacoma Dome, the barbarian, Abdul Aziz. Hello, everybody. Playing Valkyrie, Ving, the half-elf druid, Paul Oppers. Hello there. And playing Fat Billy, the halfling thief, Jessica Tai. Hi, everyone. When last we left our heroes, they were recovering from a mutiny. The ship trying to careen into the rocks of the Devil's Grin. Ving stopped the boat from crashing.

Billy caught a erstwhile mutineer leader, Eggs Benedict, physically removing a memory from his mouth before he drowned in the sea. Uh, every, people got everything back under control. Some remaining mutineers were thrown in the brig, including, uh, halfling pirate peanuts. And temporary repairs were made. Wrecks were plundered. Uh, we got some interesting loot, including a broken compass, a sword, and a book of sea shanties.

And then, uh, everybody stood around Billy while he very nonchalantly explained that he was that he pulled a memory from a man's head and, uh, proceeded to read that memory in front of everybody, discovering that Eggs was working with Bobby of the Centaur in some respect as a, as just a smuggler doing smuggler stuff. Mm-hmm. And discovered the identity and then later on location of a place called the Four Frost Islands. Oh, yeah. Some sort of snowy, icy pirate haven.

Uh, then we undertook a perilous journey. Uh, Ving navigated, Billy scouted ahead, and Tuck, uh, managed the provisions alongside Ted, uh, the somewhat violent and unstable ship's cook, I guess? Yeah, he'll fly off the handle, but he will make an Eggs Beignets that'll knock your fucking trunks off. Eggs Beignets. Is that a thing? Yeah, probably. It is in our world. What's Beignets? A Beignet is a donut. It's like a kind of, uh, egg donut. Yeah, yeah. Kind of New Orleans donut.

Yeah, with eggs and hollandaise sauce on it. Yeah. Yeah, egg donut as I'm into this. And on day five or six of, uh, Ted's delicious culinary journey that he took everybody on, uh, Tuck and Ving discovered, uh, mutineer Peanuts in the brig howling about something. And upon arriving, she asked, you see it too, Ving, right? The deer? And Ving then did see, uh, magnificent golden elk putting together that the entire crew has been eating food laced with ghost root, plundered ghost root for days.

And that is where we find our heroes now, seeing a spiritual elk in the brig. Did we all see it? You all saw it and then it disappeared. Oh, whoa. Holy shit. We're all high on ghost root. All right, everyone. Question everything. Question everything. Billy's really high on ghost root. Well, I'm so, I have been eating Crow's leftovers. Oh, no. Billy's been seeing spirits for days. Just hasn't told anybody. That's how he found the shortcut because he's like, she's just speaking to me.

Oh, that's actually kind of sweet. Billy was like watching the ocean and the spirits were like, come along, Billy. Yeah, I'm like, oh, yeah, totally. And Crow is the same. He's just like, you sure are learning the ocean root pretty, pretty quickly. Oh, yeah. And he's seeing Billy like with flowers in his hair. Yes. Oh, his actual spirit form. Yeah. Yeah. I like that. So it's at this time as you all realize, oh, something's up.

You hear, ah, and somebody behind you falls out of their hammock like slapping at their body like, get him off, get him off. And you see a puff of like bright green moths like leap off of their body and then disappear. And then it's like, hold on a second. And he walks over to his axe and he picks it up and he's like, fellas, are you here? Yeah. What's up? Oh, man. I miss you guys. Oh, man. You don't have to miss us. We're always right here. What? And then you can't hear them anymore. Fuck.

Whatever you do, don't forget to most importance. Your life hangs in the back. Well, there's something about floating when you're in the spirit world when you're on ghost route. Oh, right. I was floating. I was floating. It definitely happens in the spirit world. That's what you know for sure. Billy is all nervous. So he's like, everyone, strap yourselves down. Make sure you stay here with us. Put on whatever harness you can find. And so Billy's like tangling himself up into like a fishing net.

Yeah. If everyone, if you see like animals or whatever, it's kind of not real, but it is real. I want to gather everyone around, get around. We need to talk about something very important. I have a really good business idea. I think you guys are going to, I have so many cool apps ideas. I've been thinking about them for a long time. Like ideas for appetizers? Yeah. For different apps. Lemon curd. Try it. Try it with fish. Cause lemon, you squeeze lemon on top of the fish. That's really good.

Shit. I squinted his face. It scratches. Oh, wow. And you hear, come on, everybody. Gather around. Vig's got some great ideas here. And you look and there's a horse next to you. And then the horse disappears. Holy shit. And Maggie comes stumbling up from like where her captain's quarter is. And is like, Hey, everybody. Out of curiosity. How are you? We're all fucked on ghost route. Okay. So it's not just me then. There was a hedgehog in my quarters that was singing to me.

Do you remember the song? Nope. I don't. What do we do? Here, this helps. And he gives her some halfling pipe weed. Yeah. And she takes a huge huff. I don't have enough for everybody. Quick, blow that into somebody else's mouth. And she blows it like out the side of her mouth. Like, get away from me. Okay. I don't know shit about spirit stuff. Is this going to be dangerous? Not if you secure yourself to the ship. Billy is nuts. Billy is even more tied in than before.

Could I do something that Billy's doing? I just pictured him going around with tacks and nailing everyone's shoes to the deck. Everybody be secured. Get trapped. Get trapped. Tug is just like, all right, I think we can all agree that whatever's happening right now is for sure Ted's fault. Ted did it. Nobody else. And Ted is like laying limp in his hammock. Like his peg leg hanging down. He's like, yeah, I did it. What are you going to do about it? I'd do it again too.

He's waving a knife in the air. Come and get me. Okay. I mean, halfling pipe weed is only going to last for a few minutes. We need to get this ship under control. How long do the effects of ghost root last? And Maggie throws her hands up in the air. Fuck if I know. Bing was like, I was actually talking to the badger right there. Yes. Well, now that you mention it, ghost root, metabolize, metabolizes differently in each person's system according to their spiritual alignment. I'm fucked.

Can I have somebody can Spout Lore about that too? Okay, that's pretty good. That is actually a good idea. I'd like to Spout Lore about that. Okay, but what were you going to say? I was going to say I had an idea for the episode where it's an undertake a perilous journey role where we just have to get up to the top deck. Yeah, a bottle episode. We just have to get up to the top deck to anchor the ship. Yeah. And like make sure whoever's helping it isn't directing us into walls or whatever.

Our rations are four uses of halfling pipeweed. That's really funny. That's pretty good. We should definitely do something like that because everybody's just so freaked out. Yeah. Okay. Okay, so I'm going to Spout Lore on this. How long the effects last? Yeah. Eight. So for these kinds of like spiritual communing purposes, we're going to have Ving knows that ghost root in its purest form is the one that lasts the longest.

But since this was adulterated as it were sort of in the food, it was all mixed with a bunch of other shit. It's probably not going to last as long as traditional ghost root, but that is all you're going to get from that Spout Lore. But you know for sure that it's not going to be like a tuck in the spirit world kind of thing where he ate a whole root and flew through the spirit realm for like eons. You look over at tuck and he's like, guys, I'm flying again.

He's just hanging in somebody's hammock lying on a person. Look, I'm light as a feather. No, you're not. I promise. Okay. Okay. So here's what we're going to do. We are going to do some undertake a perilous journey roles to try and get you guys back on deck. So you're unfortunately on the bottom deck because that's where the brig was. So there's two decks above you before you get to the top. Oh my God. I love this side view. Yeah. Steve Z's who style of the ship. Yeah, exactly.

So it's going to take you one perilous journey move to get to the stairs one to get up the stairs themselves one across up one across up. Holy shit. Who's going to scout ahead and who's going to navigate? Gosh, scout is my job and I have to get out of my net. Okay. Scout ahead 2d6 plus wisdom. 12. Okay. I am the and I tell myself Billy, you're the trap expert. You know what's going on here. You can get yourself out of this mess and on a 10 10 plus from us go ahead.

You get to choose two from this list. You get the drop on whatever lies ahead. You defer discern a beneficial aspect of the terrain a shortcut shelter or tactical advantage make a discovery notice a danger. The first to get the drop on whatever lies ahead and discern a beneficial aspect. Yeah. Okay. So shortcut could be that you just know you find a way to get up to the second deck without having to get to the stairs first. Yeah, it's as I'm getting out of my net.

There's a floorboard that's loose that you see above you like a loose board. Yeah, everyone we can if you're small enough you can fit up this way just climb up the net. It's all here giant sailors across the okay. So you get the jump on whatever lies ahead as well and Billy you look up like up the beam that goes to where this loose for floorboard is and you see a glowing red spider in like a glowing red web right at the like crux of the beam and the board is like yeah come up this way.

Don't touch me. This is a shortcut. You should come up here. Okay, everyone do not go that way. Who's gonna who's gonna navigate? Because you could still deal with this spirit spider. I'll navigate spirit spider. Get over here and he picks up the axe. He starts just you know when you take like I don't know like your hand one of the Swiffers one of those Swiffer dusters and like go into corners of rooms and stuff. He's like get over here Swiffer duster with the duster and Chad.

Yeah, fight that spider buddies. So you're hacking and slashing. I'm navigating. You don't navigate of a physical a living thing. I'm navigating the water the waters of my heart my friend hack and slash. Yeah, Ted. Okay that roll your damage one. Well, you you start waving your axe at this glowing red spider and you tap it with the axe and it goes. Whoa, what the fuck and it scuttles away spirit axe bitch. You hear Larry Terry and Chad go. Yeah, fuck off. These are my boys here bro.

You don't want to come around here anymore. This hole in the wall is ours and now the way is temporarily clear as you see the spider starting to weave a web in a wide perimeter on the roof, but you have some time to try and get through the roof. All right, I slipped through. Well, somebody's got to go. Somebody's got to navigate the course. Someone's got to lead the way. Dang it. Okay. Okay, I'll go up through the thing. Everybody make yourself super skinny tall elves. Let's do it.

Duty six plus intelligence to navigate. He's looking at it like make a hole bigger. You know would make woods less make hole bigger to okay. Stay guys six on a six minus mark XP. Okay. Oh yeah, great. So what's the failure here? Snakes come out of my eyes. I'm be like follow me.

I know this and he's like and everybody sees that and literally freaks out and he's just turning around like what what in this thing and every time you look at something the things like their face everyone's running in every direction. I know follow me. Follow me. Why am I following you? You should be following me. Bruno's like there's demons on this ship! Just crashes into a pile of boxes and is gone. So everybody's now separated. It sounds like Billy you run off.

You see snakes come out of Ving's eyes. Yeah, I rolled down. I don't know under somebody's hammock and I'm clinging on from under there hiding like what is happening? Where's Ping? Tuck do you just start barreling through the ship? Yeah. Tuck hokey. Hulk runs through the ship with TLC in front of him. Smashing people out of the way. And now none of you know where on the boat you are anymore. I look under me at the floor and it's turned into like waves of sand. Like, no.

You can see like scorpions scuttling along on the sand. Porn scorpions. No, not again. Yeah, Billy, that's what you feel. You feel like this hot desert wind blow, ruffle your hair, and you hear like… No, no, it's too soon. Don't take me back there. So what do you do? I climb up the hammock and try to pull myself up the beam. 2d6 plus dexterity. Nine. Nine, okay. What's the partial success? I do get halfway up, but I slip and my shirt collar gets stuck in the wood. Like in a chip in the wood.

Looking down at the sand and porn scorpions. Yeah, you're hanging there and you feel yourself, just all your weight is pulling against the shirt that you're on. And you see the scorpions sniffing as much as snorpheons. Snorpheons. Snorpheons. We're all actually high. Not a snorpheon. You see them sniffing at the base of the pillar and start climbing up the beam. No, get away from me. Get away from me. I tuck my legs up. You see them clip in their little clickers.

One of them is like, we will get away from you for a story. Okay. Oh, you want a story? Okay. I can tell a story. No problem. I have so many. If I just calm down and look in my memory. Oh, Lordy me. There was once a Wilhelmina and she was great at farming beets and carrots. And one year the big bear came and he ate all of them. And then her family didn't know what to do because they relied on those beets and carrots to get them through the winter. And so the family starved.

And they start clacking faster. Yes. Yeah. Stupid humans. Yes. They, uh, they, they, they died and the winter came and there was a big snowfall and it covered up their little shack and no one found them until spring. Yeah. The end. Roll 2d6 plus charisma. 12. Oh, fuck. Yeah. Stupid, stupid Wilhelmina. Yeah. Pretty silly of her. All know that hoarding food for the winter never works like that stupid ant. We will help you.

And they climb up the beam and they start clicking at the spider to get the spider. Okay. Okay. Okay. And they start trying to help you up from your little thing. Thank you. Scorpion. You are free to go. Small one. Thank you. You have the heart of a scorpion. Okay. And they, they get you to a point where you can scuttle up to the deck. Okay. And now you're on the, you're on the second deck. You got one more deck to go until you're on the top thing. You have two snakes in your eyes.

Half in half out. And it's kind of fucked up because you realize that spiritually they're melding with your spirit at this time. They're using out of their mouths. You can see out of both of their eyes. So each of your eyes has two eyes right now is for the first time in his life. See sick snake sick. Yeah. All right. Yeah. Give me a 2d six plus constitution. See sick spelt s e sick. Nice. 2d six plus constitution to see how you handle this. I got 10. I like and I don't throw up.

Yeah, you don't. You're not. You're not too sick, but you still got these snakes in your eyes. They're my footing. Yeah. You find your footing and now you just got to figure out how to get to where you were trying to go. The snakes are moving a lot. So you snakes. I speak to them. Oh, parcel turn, bro. Bro. What are you doing? Dude, that's what it sounds to everyone else. But to them, it's like. Yo, what's up, man? Oh, you know, just fucking vibing in your eyes, bro. Yeah. Slytherin. Yeah.

Trying to get through to the material plane. You know, I. Hey, you got a good sense of the material plane. What? My sense of material plane right now is a little fudged up. If you know what I'm saying. I don't. Guys ever get fudged up. You guys want to get fudged up. He puts some halfling pipe weight up to his eyes. Are you trying to you're trying to inoculate these snake spirits? It's in some way. I'm trying to use their sense.

If they're if they have a good sense of material world, I want to use their snake sense to help me find my way up to the next level. Okay. Because I can't see shit really. It's all over the place. I want to hone them into users. There's snake senses to get me upstairs. Um, so you could roll to defy danger wisdom to try and use the senses of these snakes to get where you're going. I got seven. Okay.

So you kind of get them to calm down a little bit to stop moving around so much so you can see through this. Yes. They're like, okay, bro. Yeah. Yeah. But you got to you got to promise us that you will help us out when we when this is all good so we can get through the material. Do you promise? I promise. Put out your hand. He puts out his hand. And both of the snakes whip around and bite on your hands. All right. The meaty part of my thumb. Yeah. And they inject a little bit of venom into you.

You feel this like spirit venom into your body. What the fuck? Vinc sucks the venom. I'm out. Hey, hey, hey, no, bro, bro, bro. Put that back. He blows the venom back. That's part of the promise. It's how we do it. Okay. All right, let's go. Guess what, guys? What? I saw some big fat, juicy spear rats up on the second level. Fuck. Yeah. He just like leans forward and lets his eyes lead him. Yeah. And they lead you through.

There's a bunch of people losing their fucking minds between here and the stairs. And one of the people that you pass on your way to the stairs, you see behind the stairs near. A kind of darker section of the ship is tuck, who seems to be losing his mind. Tuck, you've crashed through everything on this deck to the back of the room. And what do you see when you get here? So tuck is sort of freaking out because the tree tattoo in his arm is actually turning into a real tree.

Oh, there's like branches growing out of it. And like the base of it that is like dying is actually like it looks like rotten flesh. Yeah. I'm going to go back to him. Oh, yucky. Yeah. Gross. So yeah, there's like, you're standing there by yourself basically. And there's like branches that start sprouting out of your arm. And there's like lush leaves that are starting to blossom and bush up on your arm. What do you do? He's kind of just like, just freaking out. Yeah.

Thing, what's going on with my arm? Why is it turning into tree? Dude, you're just high. It'll go away. Follow me. Okay. It's fine. Okay. Actually, that looks pretty significant. Wait, is it going to be like this forever? I don't know it, but it does seem like a metaphor. Let's just keep thinking about it as we go upstairs. What's a metaphor? It's like an analogy or a simile. What's a metaphor? I don't know. It's for whatever you want. Oh, fuck you. I'm done. I'm taking three. One.

So I cut, I grab one of Vink's flaps and I'm like just seeing leaves and stuff. And I'm like falling because I can't see anything. Okay. Then give me a defy danger wisdom, I guess. Kind of vibe your way up. Okay. Two to six. Six. Do you want to aid? Yeah, sure. Two to six plus bond. Nice, eight. Okay, cool. You guys get to the stairs. You pull Tuck around like to the stairs to get up to the next deck. Tuck, you're holding on. He's leading the way. Everything's fine.

The leaves have fully clouded your vision. Oh, whoa. And you feel like you can't move your fingers anymore. And you look back and Vink, you see that there are like leaves and branches fully encasing. And you're like, oh, I'm going to die. I'm going to die. I'm going to die. I'm going to die. I'm going to die. I'm going to die. I'm going to die. I'm going to die. Tuck's hand and like up to the middle of his arm. Vink, I'm blind. I can't see anything. You're turning into a tree. Oh.

We cut to Billy. Billy, you've climbed out through your hole in the floor. And you get to the top and you see Caroline. Yeah. She's sitting on a box. She's got both of her hands on her legs and her eyes are wide. Caroline. Caroline. Caroline. Caroline. Caroline. Caroline. Caroline. Caroline. Caroline. Caroline. Caroline. Caroline. Caroline. Caroline. Caroline. Caroline. Caroline. Caroline. Caroline. It's me, Billy. Why'd you come out of the floor? Because it was faster. Listen.

I'm pretty sure we all accidentally had some ghost root. And so anything, like question everything. If you're seeing stuff, it's not real. Just like, close your eyes or something. So wait. That's why you came out of the floor. Oh. Are you a hallucination? What? No. I'm real. Are you a hallucination, Billy? Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I touch her face. Just stay on that box and if something tries to talk to you, just ignore it, okay? She nods and goes, alright, alright.

She pulls both of her legs up onto the box she's sitting on, sits cross-legged and starts to meditate. Oh, that's smart. Okay, maybe I'll try that while I walk. So I'm like touching the wall as I walk, I'm like this is how people meditate. Think about their breathing and the floor under me or whatever. But I can't see where I'm going so I'm going to peek. One eye at a time. Hell yeah, wink blink technique. Yeah, it always works. Give me a 2d6 plus wisdom. Nine. Nine, okay.

So you're walking and you're trying to meditate you're wink blinking? You're touching the boat, you're trying to get in tune with things and you've been feeling more acutely than some probably you're like yourself being pulled between like rippled between the material and the spirit and you feel for a second a sensation that's very similar to when you have entered the ferry you feel yourself like vibrating on a precipice and you're about to fall in. Not right now. Not right now.

We're just going to stay with the little boy here. We're just going to stay with him. We're just going to stay with the little boy in the little boy body and he loves gravy. He loves to he loves his friends. He loves his two awesome friends. And you keep walking and you're doing the wink blink and you see like the deck ahead of you. You see a bunch of like glowing roly-poly bugs like roll across the floor in front of you and you wink blink again and you are standing in a snowy field. Fuck! Fuck!

Oh no! Give me a 2d6 plus 2d6 plus wisdom to try and get a hold of what's going on. Seven. Then yeah, you close your eyes and concentrate and go no, no, no not yet. And you wink blink again and you're back below deck. Well, was Billy in the Winter Wars? Winter Wars? Why do you think I would answer that question? I thought it could be. I want to know. Yeah. Too bad. Oh. You just kind of put it there to everyone. I want to know where I went. Yeah.

Listeners, if you think that Billy was in the Winter War, write us at www.winterwar.spellore.com slash Patriots. But yeah, Billy, as you're like wink blinking yourself out of this frozen field, you see just at the edge of this frozen plane a figure in a long white cloak. And then they're gone. Oh, dang it. Oh my gosh. It's all so useless. And the roly-poly bugs are sitting in front of you. Now, like, you okay? No, I'm not. That was weird. Move. And they pop up into balls and they roll away.

And you're in front of the ladder. You found the ladder. All right. Up I go. Yeah. And we're going to cut back to Tuck and Ving. Ving saw Billy go up through the hole in the ceiling and he was like, it's okay, buddy. I saw Billy go upstairs. He's going to come over and open this latch any second now. Come on, Billy, Billy, Billy. And you're standing there for what feels like six weeks and the hatch doesn't open. It doesn't open. I'm hungry. There's somebody new here.

Yeah, it's Bruno standing there like, yeah, man, he's going to come for sure. And then cut forward another 10 minutes and there's like a group of pirates who have gotten to the stairs and we're all just waiting there. Yeah, he's definitely, he's definitely coming for sure. I can't wait for Billy to come. Save us. Hey, does anybody else think maybe we should try and open this hatch ourselves? Mutiny. Get him. I'm going to try and open the hatch. Oh, we can open from down here. Yeah.

Why do you think we would lock? Anyway, and you see this, it's the chunky mutineer, the older dude from, he's got like short cut gray hair and a long walrusy mustache. And he like hobbles up to the ladder. He very shakily grabs onto one bar, very shakily grabs onto the other bar and starts slowly putting his feet down. Putting his feet on the ladder. But then the second step, he instead of alternating feet, picks the same foot up again and he's just halfway walking up this ladder. I got it.

I'm going to get it. Other foot, dude. Other foot. What do you mean? You move your other foot too. Oh my God. And he puts his other foot back down on the ground and starts picking the other foot up. So what do you guys do? What do you do? Do you all just stand there? I mean, I want to give this, I'm going to give the chunky monkey guy some halfling pipe weed. I don't know, man. I haven't done that stuff since I was like 25. I grab him like a kiss and blow it in his mouth. That's the stuff.

I'll miss that. Okay, here we go. And he puts both hands on both bars at the same time this time. One step, two steps, alternating feet. And then you hear people in the crowd being like, Doug, Doug, Doug. He's doing it. Everyone's chanting a different name. Charles, Charles, Charles. T-Bow, T-Bow, T-Bow, T-Bow. And he reaches up and you see him wobble back. He tilts back for a second. And he grabs on. And he reaches up and he just pushes it open because it's not locked at all.

And he opens the door. Yeah. Fully. Yeah. Yeah. I did it. Charles. Doug, Doug. I did it. Frank, you did it. You hear that, Vanessa? And he points at the sky. I did it. And he tumbles up out of the hatch and you hear him start running. I did it. And then you hear a crash and a yell. Yeah, are we still in just the middle deck? Yeah. I don't have enough weed to get out of this boat. So you guys climb up out of the deck onto this. The one that's just below the top deck. And you climb out into a…

Can I get a… Like a bug sound? Like a flying bug sound? You climb up into a lush, humid jungle. It sounds lush. It is lush, bro. It's fucking humid in here. It's so lush. Maybe it's lush enough to hotbox the whole crew. Yeah. We could be calling hotboxes whole bird. By God, that's Bruno. By God, bro. I think you're right. Let's do it. Yeah, I mean, why not? That makes sense. It's the only way. Okay. Bruno gets everybody to give him some space. I know what I'm doing.

Wait, Bruno's in charge of this hotbox? I'm always in charge of the hotbox, bro. Hand it over. All right, I trust you. He takes it. And he… He pulls out what looks to be some sort of long glass and metal tube that he's been carrying on his person this whole time. I don't know what I'm doing. He hands it over to me. God damn it. Okay. I got too scared. It's too much pressure. Whips it up like an expert. Makes like a third lung and water jug with an old two liter pop bottle or whatever.

Gets a brazier down. Throws it in there. Lights it. So you're going to use all of your remaining… Pipe weed. But if you get this, then it's going to clear at least you and Tuck. Oh, sick. Okay. Light it up. All right. 2d6 plus wisdom, it seems like. Nice. Well, yeah. Nine. I'll help. All right. How? I bite into an apple and I turn it into a bong. Yeah. Perfect. You're going to make an apple out of a bong. He starts eating a bong. A bong a day keeps the doctor away. All right. 2d6 plus bond.

Plus bong. Nice. 11. Beautiful. 11. Yeah. Eight plus two. Wait, is this three? That's a two and a three. Oh, shit. Yeah. These are d6. That wouldn't make any sense. Abdul, you need glasses. I failed. I failed. Mark your point of experience. Okay. 12. I failed. Guys, I'm high. So, yeah. The seven to nine is only one of you is going to be clear enough to actually be effective. Okay. I'm the one over the brazier. It's probably me. Yeah. Totally. So. Ving, leave me behind. Ving, leave me behind.

He's talking to Bruno. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Leave him behind. Take me with you. I can help. Oh God. And you feel the snakes in your eyes start to recede and they go, remember bro, you promise. I remember. And they disappear. Whoa. And you can see clearly and tuck. You see just a bushy bush where his arm used to be. Wow.

And his eyes have leaves covering them as well. Oh my God. Wow. And we're going to cut to Billy. Billy, you find the ladder. You haul yourself up it. Yeah. It takes so much longer than you think it's going to. Yeah, because his perception of distance is changing. So he's like a foot off the ground, but looks so far. And he's so scared. Yeah. You look down six inches and you hear like, ka-ka! Yeah. On the top of a mountain. It's a canyon down there. And the wind is blowing so hard.

It's like a hurricane! It's like a hurricane! Shifts to a wide shot. And he actually is, Billy is blowing in the wind. Like there's some sort of hurricane wind down here that only Billy can feel. Whoa! You're going to have to roll something to get up this ladder. 2d6 plus a dexterity. 10. Good lord. Jesus Christ. Yeah. Yeah, you are used to climbing up high places. And spirit winds only push you further up the ladder. Oh, yeah. You feel the wind kind of catch you under the butt and pick you up.

A couple feet. It's all these flower petals that fly up around me. Oh! Wow, we all really like that. And you feel your feet gently touch at the top of the ladder. Crow. And you look up and you see wood. Because there's still, you're still on the last deck before the top. Oh, shit. Where am I? God, I've never been, I'm lost. And Billy, you feel, you're starting to get pretty high. You're hungry. You've been traveling for months. Months. You're starving. What do I have?

You have nothing on you that you can, that you can eat. I'm going to go find a snack. Mm-hmm. And, oh man, it's perfect. You start walking around looking for something to eat and you find yourself in a beautiful orchard full of ripe, fat persimmons. No, no, stay away, Billy. Those aren't real. Oh, they smell so good. They're so juicy and ripe. Cover your nose. So Billy sticks both fingers up his nose. Yeah. He's like walking around. Like, don't fall for it. Oh my God, don't trip, Billy.

No, don't listen. And one plops right on the ground in front of you into the soft green grass of this orchard. Oh my God. You can see the juices leaking out. No, right away. Okay, and as you're running away, you hear Hello? And you're swarming around the persimmon, the juice. And what's leaking out on the ground is a single wasp. Oh my God. Oh my God. Run away. Wait a sec. It's actually freaking Justin. You seem familiar. Who? Where?

And it goes, and it flies right up to your face and starts flitting around. I know you. Billy's going to try to meditate just like Caroline was. Yeah, hit the ground and just meditate right away. Yep. Okay, 2d6 plus wisdom. Okay. Eight. Okay. You do it. You meditate and you close your eyes, sit on the ground and start trying to align yourself out of whatever fragment of the spirit realm this is. And you hear, be seeing you. Good one. I mean, wasp seeing you. Fuck.

And yeah, you, the buzzing slowly fades and you open your eyes and you are sitting on a pile of burlap sacks. Oh, I've never been so happy to be here. Man. How many grudges did we maybe create when we were in the spirit realm? At least one. A wasp. Yeah. Yeah. Ving definitely has grudge with the eagle for sure. Yeah. Oh yeah. Eagle. Who thankfully it does not appear has arrived at this boat. Every time. Yeah. Ving hears like any like, but who knows?

I feel like this event might be creating some turbulence in the spirit world that we might have to be dealing with later on. Yeah. It's like, there's like a pinpoint like convergence because we ate so much ghost, like so many people ate so much ghost through that. It's just like, it's like a beacon. Yeah. World. Yeah. All the spirits are coming to like take a sniff. Yeah. Cause they're all like, we can get through over here. Yeah.

Uh, so Billy, you see that you're now, you just see the boat for a second for a merciful moment. You just see what is actually around you. Uh, and you see that the ladder to the deck is close, but so far you even see light, coming through actual daylight. So you're going to have to navigate your way there. So give me a two D six plus intelligence. Wow. Whoa. I have no intelligence and it's a 12. Fuck. You rolled two sixes. I did. Wow. I love two sixes. Oh, so nice.

So Billy is doing the safe thing and he's, uh, like army crawling on the floor. Cause he's like, just stay in touch with the material world. Nice. Just stay as close to the, to the ground as you can. Trying to take in every actual physical sensation. Like, Oh, sawdust. Oops. I cut myself. Like just really trying to stay grounded and you find yourself at the base of the ladder. Beautifully. There are people rolling on the ground, seemingly struggling with some sort of spirit.

You see Ted finally is just like, Oh, he's like punching open air in front of him, but it seems like he's really in the middle of it. He's got a mouth full, big, beautiful white teeth. Spirit teeth. Yeah. Uh, and the ladder's right there in front of you. And we're going to cut back to tucking Ving. Oh, Ving, you can see tuck. You're a tree. I'm full. You just feel like a tree. Okay. Got trees for eyes. You got a tree for a hand. Stay with me, buddy. Don't get rooted.

God, this is the highest I've ever been for sure. I feel like a tree. And then, you know, there is one more deck above you before you get to the top. Okay. We're at the, there's a whole line of people who are freaking out attached. Like, it's like a hand on hand. Yeah, exactly. I'm the high. I'm two times high, but it seems to be working. Yeah. And you're still in this kind of like jungle zone. Do I need to navigate then? Because I'd have to get to the next one. Yeah.

Yeah, Ving, get us out of the jungle zone. Cause I'm stiffening. 2d6 plus intelligence. Hold on. That's hilarious. All right. I'm box car. Holy two sixes. Fuck. Plus intelligence. Hell yeah. Zero. Woo hoo. On another navigation. Okay. On another intelligence rule, you avoid dangers and distractions and make good time reaching a point of the GM's choosing before you need to make camp. You're not going to have to make camp. Oh man. This is like, and the thing is the lineup of people is so long.

Yeah. And you thankfully get to the ladder through, uh, all of these like dense, like jungle, like mangrove trees and vines chopping them out of the way. He's just like hacking people's belongings up with him. He's got the sword, the sword that he found and he's just hack. But you dad, you do get to one point in the spirit leaves and you hear something move through the trees next to you. Everyone get behind me and it moves off into the distance. I chase it. You chase it. I want to chase it.

Okay. You got Chuck, Chuck, Chuck. Fuck. What's your name? No. Yeah. It's Chuck now. Cause how much wood would a wood? Yeah. If a woodchuck could fuck wood and then he goes to fist bump, but he just touches the air. Cause he's, he's blind. Come on, man. Where are you? Uh, yeah, you're going to go, you're going to chase it down. Well, I just want to say something. All right. Uh, this is going to be another navigate. Oh God. Okay. Who are you? I got a 10. So fucked up. So fucked.

Uh, get back here. I want to help you grow. Then you're pushing through this like spirit foliage and you know that you're coming to the edge of the boat. You can tell. I stop. I listen. I look, I feel you look and you reach out and it's just like impenetrable. There's just air in front of you and you see the moonlight passing through the dense jungle. Oh, so cool. You see what looks like an elf and they make the quickest eye contact with you and then they dart into the trees and they're gone.

Is this your thing? We're going to cut back to Tuck. Sick. Tuck, Ving has run off into the trees. You think you can hear kind of. I ran into the, the room closet. I can hear a lot of rummaging around in there. Now, Perel's in there. Oh, what are you doing? Get off of me. But I don't hear help. Oh man. Yeah. Where's, how's Perel doing? Do you think? Can we cut to Perel for a second? Yeah. Perel's just on the front of the boat and he's looking down as the water passes by.

Can you be looking at his hands? He's like his webbed hands. Yeah. His hands are webbed like a frog's hands and he's just like, Oh no, he's reverted. He's reverted to the fish form. That's why it's webbed. Oh, cool. I love the fish. He's coy again. Yeah. His hands are like shimmering with like golden orange scales. They're like webs in between his fingers. He's like, Whoa. And that's, he's just, his mouth is just opening and closing. Like he's trying to stop himself from jumping into the water.

It's like, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, on his chest as he like hurts a little bit he's just like whoa and we cut back down to Billy Billy you find yourself clamoring up the ladder yeah can you roll one more thing for me a defy danger dexterity 10 we're I'm killing it we're all rolling we're having so much fun this is so good at being high and Chuck is just blind this is the best you've ever maybe rolled and it's so low stakes yes to the get to the top deck and after scaling this insurmountable five-step ladder you roll out onto the deck and the actual sea air touches you for the first time in what feels like decades oh my god breathe again it's real the ocean is real and actually you take a breath and you breathe in this deep brining air around you and you feel your body calm and your vision clear a little bit and any like you know the roly-poly bugs that followed you up the ladder start to shimmer and fade around you and there are some people on the deck but they look like they're just exhausted they're sleeping now people are like hunched over stuff you see Perel his floral day coat flapping in the wind at the front of the boat as he's flexing his hands and he's like no no no no no no no no no no no and you see crow high up and he goes Billy are you okay yeah what is going on down there I'll tell you in a bit okay you're safe I'm good I just have to check on Perel okay I'm really fucking high it's Billy yeah I love I love you man I love you I just love everybody I'm having a great time and you find Perel at the front of the boat and he hears you coming and he whips around it's just me oh Billy oh Billy don't listen to whatever you see no I won't I can't be that fish again you're not that fish I can't be that fish again you're the wizard Perel oh I can't be that fish just lay on the floor let me just wrap you up in your coat like all nice look at you with your human face and your human hands and no fish scales anywhere hold on and he rolls over onto his side and he works a little bit and works his mouth and he spits out onto the deck a triangular silver coin oh what I didn't eat that and he points it Billy I want to be clear I didn't eat a coin I know I think Koi did though oh oh oh okay I think that's it I think that's all that's in there yeah you want me to rub your I'll rub your back here you go oh thanks Billy that feels great yeah that feels great giving you a little back rub thank you so much and Maggie stumbles up behind you and she's breathing deeply too and you can see her constitution clearing in some way and she's like wow that was bad huh it was pretty rough um seems to help once we get up top here okay wow great uh so everybody else below deck probably still losing it yeah okay all right we should probably go help him we're waiting at the next one okay we saw Maggie go up any second now she'll be coming in intrepid captain wouldn't let us down this time and uh yeah she comes down and she does open the hatch for everybody and sees all of these all right let's let's get everybody cleaned up huh we're covered in shit stuff like whatever was down here you smashed into it I know but that time that we were waiting under the Billy hatch I think it was like from our perception years being invented cool ranch Doritos in the time that it took you guys actually formed a community called cool ranch we fashioned like clothes ourselves out of skins quote unquote that we found old sacks and shirt totally yeah there's been a war between the two tribes and some people died and then tuck comes out he's still blind and he's like I've lived a thousand lifetimes and everybody comes up onto the deck one by one everybody's breathing in this sea air and this spiritual perception is finally clearing from their vision tuck you feel but don't see the leaves fall away from your eyes and your your fingers soften and start moving again oh god holy shit and your tattoo is just a tattoo I'm soft again guys and I'm in a soft face and everybody is standing on deck and you realize you've just been drifting for like hours and hours and hours who knows how long and yeah it seems like you've drifted off course a little bit and Maggie goes all right everybody she's standing up on a box all of the crew gathered around everybody sweaty and and pale and just kind of wearing whatever they had on them or whatever clothes they made out of whatever spirit materials they thought they saw some people have gotten married and divorced in the time that they lost yeah all right everyone I think we can all agree that that was pretty fucked Ted you're off rations and Ted goes I think that's smart next order of business is get back on track and get to the four frost islands what do we say yeah everybody goes actually you know what first let's maybe take a break everybody get some rest yeah yeah and they go and they very gently drop the anchor hoping that the mechanism doesn't fully come loose this time and the tuck has to lower it down hand over hand and he's still so fucking hung over like spirit hung over yeah 2d6 plus strength three experience you did this yourself go ahead and I wait six because I have three strength so someone can help me I'll aid you yeah totally yeah there's no yeah no reason you can't three no five six I got six six well I mean this is technically a situation in which so funny in which somebody can aid and aid because I mean if we're all fucked right now I'd love to see has gone to pick up that triangle coin and he sees both of you struggling and I also struggle got six you can't do shit you also got a six yeah oh my god go sprute so six three sixes three sixes three oh no beelzebub oh man it was like tuck started lowering it and then it started like slipping through his fingers because his hands still feel weird and then ving ran up and was like oh I got you buddy and then got sucked to the edge of the ship as soon as he grabbed it yeah billy had gone to try to help but he slipped on a banana slipped on a banana and uh skidded up into your guys's legs yeah and slammed into ving who slammed into tuck who dropped the anchor ted's there with the is it ted right who was in charge of the rations and he's like I swear that was the last ration I'll ever touch he's eating a banana ted I'm not gonna eat at all I promise uh so I think you drop the anchor so fast that the boat goes like and something falls over the side what is it to be lost forever fucking ted I hope oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh okay I mean it could be ted uh oh actually okay um something below deck<|cy|> something below deck smashes is it the liquid gold it's the liquid gold so if you go below deck to figure out what that was somebody comes up and is like what is this and it's like bulging out of the seams in the thing cuz it's like it's gold now it looks like a giant nugget of gold yeah so really thin and brittle yeah if we wanted to sell it we would have to be like super sneaky about it yeah exactly shit yeah uh but everybody takes a break if you've lost any hit points which I don't think you have feel free to replenish some stuff what's black from knights embrace a black spire rises oh can I try and commune with him right now it's doing a resting yeah cuz we're so close to spirit realm maybe I can figure out how to do it cuz we still have some ghost read in my system is the dumb thing that tux says to vang where he's like ving this is I'm pretty sure cuz I have a little bit of ghost root left in my system I can figure out how to do this things like yeah whatever knowing full well that cosmologically metaphysically not connected at all yeah so tux trying to find a way to connect with black spire using the pick I guess 2d6 plus wisdom six I'll aid yeah okay yeah d6 plus bond 11 yeah so I think maybe ving has to be close to do that at least for now and it is also probably because of the ghost root that it's working right now you what does it look like when you're trying to do this thing how do you do I the tiger I mean I don't know I just remember what it's like to be in presence with whoever I'm trying to reach out with whoever's been marked and I close my eyes and I wait for them to come to me so I try and think of black spire close my eyes and I think about wrestling of in the desert and and feeding him shiny crunch and that one tea party we had together that no one was involved what he's being saw that memory what the fuck and um yeah you see but don't feel your eyes like blink open and you see in gray scale basically high rock walls ancient rusted machinery and you feel like a deep like rumbling as you draw in breath and he that back out and you feel a question like on the edge of your mind and then the connection is broken he's curious today so something's going on with that yeah he's exploring he's exploring the mind or maybe I don't know he's curious about something else uh what are tucking or what are billion being doing with their quiet time um Billy's playing with his stuff what stuff like he because he took the triangle coin a parallel coughed up so he he's taken a packed his stuck basically and it's just a slight Yeah, there is.

I need somewhere to put this coin. I feel around the teddy. Are there any seams or pockets? There are seams. There seems to be one seam that is separate from the seams that would actually hold the bear together. But you would have to open it up. Yeah. I'm going to open it up. So you take your little knife and pop the seams on it. Inside is a small rectangular kind of beat up burnished metal box. What's inside of you?

The box itself doesn't open up, but there is on the side what looks like a little crank that folds out to the side. Okay. I crank it open. You start cranking and it starts to play a very quiet Macallan lullaby. Aww. It reminds you of the feeling of being held and watched over and cool desert air blowing in through the window on a moonlit night. You could probably shove your coin in the bear now too. I do that. I feel bad now taking it from Jake.

Yeah, so you jam your little coin in there with the music box in the bear. Was it the triangle coin that you put in there? Yeah. Cool. It's still kind of sticky. Smells pretty bad. Gross. What the? I forgot to wipe it off. Billy, wipe coins off. You're finding fish. Sorry. What's Ving doing with his quiet time? He's doing a little commune with the whispers of this part of the sea. He's never been to this part of the sea.

And in this part of the sea, I mean, everybody would see this when they come up. It's given way on the Macallan coast side to like, you see this place that we talked about, the pillar lands. Yeah. Yeah. You can see the pillars far off in the distance. The desert is giving way to like rocky, rugged, dry mountains with like the towering peaks of the white clouds far, far in the distance. Oh, I really like that there's like, you know how we look across to Washington and those mountains are huge.

Yeah. And then sometimes the clouds are behind them and then you're like, those look like way bigger mountains. That's like the white mountains are like. Yeah. Yeah. Massive. They tower over them. That's so cool. And far, far to the east you see, you know, the edge. The edge of the sea of graves. And it's starting to get colder. Like it's not as dry and hot as it was in Macall or closer to the coast further south. It's starting to get a little bit cold. Yeah. He stopped seeing.

There's like albatross that are off the shore of Macall and they'll go out really, really far, but he hasn't seen one for days. Yeah. Yeah. The ecosystem is starting to change. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Roll plus wisdom. Be granted a vision of significance to me or my allies and the spirits around you. On a 10 plus, it's clear and helpful. On a 7 to 9, it's unclear.

On a miss, it's upsetting and traumatizing. Ving's got his wooden necklace with Cloudpiercer, little bird. And he's just kind of got that. He's got it in his mouth. He's sitting there quietly. Four. Five. Four. Wonderful. He's still fucking wasted high. He found some more half-weed. So you're sitting there meditating, trying to commune with the spirits. And his mind is just, his thoughts are, he can't get there. He's just like, to-do list.

That thing I said, I wish I didn't divorce that person I met in the bottom of the decks. Man, that whole life I lived, I really messed that up. Yeah. And you're seeing all the things that you saw. You're seeing, you know, scorpions, the desert, your friend turning into a tree before your very eyes, Billy lost in a snowy field, dense jungle, biting insects, the image of an elf in the jungle, in the moonlit trees, and then steel gray waves.

And then you see towering above you a wall of fog, impenetrable, endless, consuming. The fog rolls towards you. I'm scared. Black prows, emerge from the wall. Whoa. Crude by hearty, brutal looking people. And then you see pitch black eyes. You feel teeth on your neck and then nothing. Whoa. Oh, God. And that's where we're going to end it for this week. I'm your game master, Sean O'Hara. Joining me as always, playing Tacoma Dome, the barbarian Abdul Aziz. So long.

Playing Ving, the half-elf druid, Paul Oppers. Take care. And playing Fat Belly, the halfling thief, Jessica Tai. Bye, everyone. Thank you to the incomparable Aaron Reid for, for our amazing intro and outro music. All of the original music on Spout Lore can be found on our SoundCloud account. Thank you to all of our supporters from around the world. If you want to support us on Patreon, go to www.patreon.com slash speltlore or speltlore.com slash money, please.

And you can find us online at speltlore most places. We'll see you next time. And so ends the tale of adventures three who tried their best they could. And though dumb and scared and lost they be for times of rest in revelry And though our journey may be like a conclusion We will not leave you without a resolution Return next week to hear some more whilst you're commute Or do your chores And for you I'd gladly Spout Lore

For more of the gooey goodness that you love from Spout Lore, come on down to speltlore.com slash money please where we'll redirect you to the Patreon and then donate there for the more of the thing that you like. Did you say gooey? Yeah. That's not bad. That breath was worse than anything else you said actually. Gather round friends, let me tell you a tale of three heroes, noble and bold. A brute, a druid, and a thief who is but nine years old.

You know them by name, you know them by deed, their quests are famously daring. So here I sit, singing to you an adventure that is worth sharing. Tuck is the brute, he knows not his home, he loves to sing and fight. Fingers half-elf, he shifts his shape and wields a spear with great might. Billy's a thief, his tiny size does mask the largest heart. Best and brightest they may not be, but their friendship outweighs their smarts.

So gather round friends and listen close, for the tale's about to start. Hello everybody and welcome to Spout Lore. I'm your game master Sean O'Hara. Joining me as always playing Tacoma Dome, the barbarian Abdul Aziz. Hello everybody. Playing Ving, the half-elf druid Paul Oppers. Hello there. And playing Fat Billy, the halfling thief Jessica Tai. Hi everyone.

When last we left our heroes, they had discovered a smuggling operation and been beset upon by young Bruno, a one member of such smuggling organization. Seemingly just kind of out of a need to belong than a dastardly scheming nature. Uh, they flipped Bruno into working for them. Took him to Maggie Cole and said, Hey, there's going to be a mutiny and Bruno knows what's up.

And, uh, also discovered the smuggling of, uh, a Griffin, a young half parrot, half monkey creature who has taken a shine to Billy. Yeah. As a French accent. As a French accent seems to say, you know, parrot stuff like fruits and nuts and hello. Um, Maggie tasked the gang with, uh, infiltrating and disrupting the gang. Which they did with extreme skill. Yeah. Uh, Ving setting up the boat to be overtaken by him in at a moment's notice with some clever engineering mutiny, the mutiny. Yeah. Got it.

You got to mutiny the mutiny. That's how you stop a mutiny. Uh, and then Billy and Tuck sewing descent amongst the, uh, the crew. Yeah. By giving them food because that seems to be the main thing is everyone's hungry on this boat. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right.

Giving people food is a great way to get them on your side uh and then the mutiny itself went off with so many hitches there was a ton of hitches uh billy did a little too good of a job of sowing dissent making everyone on the boat think everyone else was part of the mutiny no matter what maybe even convincing some members of the mutineers that they were not uh and they were able to take control of the clear water just as the pirate stalker blue period pulled up alongside and released a cannon volley that the gang dealt with personally quite well billy lost some spaghetti lost a little loss well it did hit him in the face so he didn't lose a ton of it he might have got some of that back in his mouth ving called up the the spirits of wind to uh deal with the blue period sending it careening into one of the jagged granite cliffs of the devil's grin where it has begun to sink uh before losing control of the spirit of wind altogether and sending the clear water itself careening into the grin which is where we find our heroes now we're on the deck of the ship every there's fucking panic on the deck everybody's getting up there are people that are like knocked out there are people that are probably dead people have been thrown over the side anchors down the sails have come down but the wind is picking up to the point where it's just pushing you the bulk of the ship itself along you it hasn't hit the end of the chain yet but once it does uh ving you can tell this wind is pretty strong it might start dragging the boat so what do you do I ving runs and jumps off the boat he dives and then and then tuck turns because he's abandoning us everyone abandoned ship okay he dives off the off the boat along the length of the chain I'm gonna try and go down to where the anchor is and then he's like oh my god I'm gonna die I'm gonna die I'm gonna die I'm gonna die and then he runs up to the anchor and runs up to the anchor and runs up to the anchor and runs up to the anchor We just stopped moving because it's being dragged.

Oh. But you just seem like, I'm out. See you later, losers. Yeah. So, okay, man, what would this… Because it's probably pretty deep, right? So, are you just pounding water, trying to get down? I'm going to use elemental form. Pretty sick. Your new move. Bing jumps up in the air, and as he's up arcing, into a nice, beautiful swan dive, all the wood from all the cannon shot that's against the side of the boat, the wood jumps up in the air and gathers around him, and this beautiful wooden…

It looks like when people make animals on the beach out of driftwood, but it's a dolphin. And they just surround him, and then he dives in the water, and heads down the train. I really thought you were going to make a form out of water. Yeah, that's also what I thought. No, I'm going to make it hard. It's harder for me to get down there out of wood. So buoyant. Yeah. But can you explain what elemental form is?

Yeah, so elemental form is a new move that Bing took that allows him to transmute his body into a form made of the raw elements. So what we've talked about is how this move isn't Bing physically transmuting his own body. It's forming bodies around him. Like a mech of raw elements. A Gundam made out of spaghetti. Thank you. And I have to roll plus con, and I hold. Oh, I got five. So I miss. Con. Plus my con, seven. Don't just not add your stats. I don't remember games.

I got seven, so I get two hold. Two hold, okay. So I assume we're going to be using one of these hold to effortlessly swim to the bottom of the… Yeah, to traverse the depths. Cool. Yeah, you sail through your… You can look through the wooden eye holes of your new dolphin submersible. Yeah. As you sail down the length of chain, you see through the water in the distance, you see bodies sinking into the water from the blue period. Oh, shit. I don't want to let anyone die.

Can I go take them into my form, into my air form on the way down? I mean, you've only got two… Oh, no, they're in the distance. You'd have to swim to go get them. I'll continue down to the chain. I pause. Bing pauses. Yeah. And is brought to a… Dilemma. So you, yeah, you carry down following the chain to the sea floor. Mm-hmm. And you can see as the water, as the chain is being pulled by the boat, you can see the anchor kind of flipping around.

It hasn't hit anything that it's like caught onto yet, but it's trying. I'll spend my last hold to position the anchor so that the spiky ends grab into the bottom and onto a rock. Yeah. So when you spend this last hold, that form is going to fall away. Yeah. And you're going to be in Bing's body at the bottom of the, at the sea floor. Great. Okay. Yeah. That's all I can do. So you use your huge wooden dolphin nose to push the anchor into a rock formation where the edges catch.

And you hear the like clong under the water as the chain snaps taut. And the anchor is secure. Great. And all of the wood starts to fall away from you and float back up to the surface. I grab the biggest chunk and float up with it. Okay. Defy danger, Dexterity. And say to the drowning people, Follow me, citizens. Defy danger, Dexterity, to grab one in time. Okay. Nice. Nine. Okay. So you grab one and it starts carrying you. Can I aid? I can aid from any distance. Yes. I saw Bing go overboard.

So he's been watching the whole time. And then he sees like little bits of wood starting to come up. And bubbles? Yeah. Or no bubbles? No bubbles. What's worse, bubbles or no bubbles? I can't tell. I can't tell. So I'll use luck. I'll use luck of the fair folk to aid from any distance. Sweet. So Billy's just standing at the side of the boat going like, Come on, come on, come on. Yeah. But he also throws a rope over. Okay. So 2d6 plus bond. Six plus one, seven. Okay. That makes it a 10.

And you grab onto a piece of wood and it starts pulling you up to the surface. And you're like, oh, no, I don't know if I'm going to make it in time. And then you see the tip of a rope. It's like a plop into the water and start sinking down. Yeah. Weird. And it's kind of like coming at an angle because of Billy's power. Oh, yeah. Yeah. Weird. I just reach up and it finds my hand. Right in your hand. Yeah. And you get yanked back up to the surface. You break the water. Oh, yeah. Up onto the boat.

Cool. And you see looming above you the clear water and you see the damage from the cannon barrage for the first time. And there are some chunks missing. Oh, and Billy's face is covered in blood, I think. Billy, no. What is wrong? Are you okay? I'm fine. I start to meet falling off of Billy's face. I'm pouring a bottle of wine. Yeah. So the wind is whipping like it's it's starting to pick up pretty bad. The waves are getting big. The boat's getting tossed around.

It's like being pulled against the anchor. Yeah. It like swings broadside, basically. What is the devil's grin look like? Yeah. It's a looming like wall of jagged stone peaks. The widest is probably. You know, like 40 feet wide. And they're like in a toll like this freestanding. Yeah. They poke up out of the water on their own. Is there like fog in there or is it like. No, it's you can see all the way through. You're still kind of in McCollum waters. So it's a pretty clear.

Well, it was a clear day until spirits of wind started whipping up. Are like clouds starting to form and stuff. Okay. Stars. Skies start to turn gray. And, you know, Perel runs up to you. Maggie's on deck. She runs over. Yeah. Yeah. She just strides up the stairs from below decks and sees two people fighting and just grabs them both by the scruff of the neck and picks them up. And Maggie runs over and goes, what's going on? We did the mutiny on the mutiny. Yeah.

We tried to stop a mutiny by starting the mutiny. I remember the plan. I remember the plan. What do we do? What's going on right now? Oh, so we're anchored right now. I've anchored the ship, but we're still in a lot of trouble because of this wind. It's out of control. My fault. Sorry. Okay. I think. Best ways probably just to ride it out. She looks at Ving and says, can you stop this wind? And he's picking his nose. He's blowing out like snot from the bottom of the ocean. What? The wind.

Can you do anything about the wind? I don't know what I mean. I've never been able to stop it before because I lose control, right? You have a move specifically about stopping. I know. Eye of the storm. I just didn't want to do two moves in a row for some reason. Oh, that's fine. Yeah. The other things that are going on is the remaining people are trying to figure out who is loyal on the ship. Oh, yeah. Benedict is still in the wind. Right. Yeah. Tuck looks around for eggs. Benedict.

You don't see him on deck. I look around for peanuts. You do see peanuts. Is she okay? She's fighting Ted right now. I'm so conflicted about who I want to win this. I feel like I have no skin in this game. And I'm just like, who cares? They'll work that out. I think Ted's going to win. Billy. Billy. Billy. What are you talking about? What are you talking about? He's missing teeth and he has one leg. Yeah. And he's still fighting. That says a lot.

And I look over and it's like beautiful the way he's moving. He's twirling around on that one leg like a top. What a man. And somebody tries to punch him in the teeth, but he doesn't have any. So they miss. Ha ha. You fell into my trap. So wait, Billy, have you seen eggs? I saw him like five minutes ago. Where was he going? He's going downstairs. He's going downstairs. Okay. Yeah. Let's go try and track him down. All right. Okay.

While you guys are going downstairs, can I do my quickly just try and see if I can do eye of the storm? Yeah, totally. Because it'll kind of set the stage for if Billy and Tuck are running below deck in a ship that's being tossed about on the sea. Yeah. So I'm going to exert my will in a circle around me on a hit. The world calm. Seven to nine. Events. Only what I touch as long as I'm touching it. Mm-hmm. Eye of the storm. That's plus con. So I got eight. Okay. Okay.

So it's only what you touch as long as you're touching it. Okay. Ving puts his hands on the boat. Oh, nice. Cool. Fucking rad. Yeah. You exert that influence through the wood of the ship asking the wind and the sea to calm, to protect you, to keep the people on this boat safe and alive. And our chain strong. Yeah. It extends through the links of the chain down into the stone of the earth itself. Ooh. And the deck stops bucking beneath your feet and the wind stopped whipping.

And Billy and Tuck, you're running down to the stairs and you're like, you know, getting jostled around and then you hit the actual staircase and everything stops. We look back at Ving. What does he look like? He's like Spider-Man. He does not look cool. He's like crouched on a box. And he's like, he goes to give him like two thumbs up. And then. The wind puts him back down. Got to touch. Great. So, yeah, you guys head down. Yeah.

And I grabbed the first person I see and I go, where's X Benedict? Who? Where is he? Who are you talking about? X Benedict, the cockswain or whatever. What was he? Coxen. Was he cockswain? No, bosun. Boswain. Bosun cockswain. And this guy's like, what are you talking about? And he's got blood running down his face. Oh, God, you're too fucking injured. And I toss him. I grab another person. Now I'm more injured. What? Tell me where X Benedict is. I don't know what you're talking about.

And then I pick up Billy like a gun. God. Point him at his face. And I say, where's X? I know he's down here. So hard. The idea of you just grabbing. The back of all of his clothes and holding him in front of you. He's the most dangerous thing I have. It's true. He's got. I don't know what you're. I don't know anybody. Oh, yeah. Hold on. Hold on. I know this person is lying to us. So I am going to do a move. Defy danger charisma. Yeah. To just threaten them. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. By the gun move. I got really close to his face and also all the sauce on my face looks so intense. Yes, it does. I look like I mean business. You look like Freddy Krueger right now. He flinches away from Billy. He goes, he's trying to get a boat. He's trying to escape. Where? He is above. He's in disguise. What does he look like? He's wearing a cloak with a hood.

Which side of the boat is he on? I don't know. I'm downstairs. And I'm like, fine, dick. Let me go. Okay, fine. I will. Okay. Okay. All right, let's go up. Let's go up. And I kick this guy in the balls and run away. And you get up on the deck and yeah, there's still people tussling and you're looking for a guy in a cloak. Yeah. Should we discern realities? Yeah. Discern realities. This is great. Okay. Here we go. I'd say it's the guy by the boats in a cloak. There he is. The cloak guy. Nice.

Ten. Ten. Okay. So you get three questions from discern realities. What here is useful or valuable to me? You see by the boats, a guy in a cloak. But he's like, the boats are like lashed to the actual deck. So there is, somebody is trying to untie the boats and get other people to untie. So you have to get the boat with them and push it towards the side of the boat. Wait, here is not what it appears to be. The cloak is actually a row with a separate hood. Yeah. Okay.

So you're looking at this cloaked figure moving around and you're like that. There's no way that's eggs. Just not the right size. And yeah, so this seems to be something else. Okay. Then what is about to happen? They are going to send that boat over the side and eggs, is going to use that distraction to truly escape. Fuck. But Billy here, from where Tuck is swinging you around like a lantern. Yeah. I'm just using Billy as the inanimate objects now. I got you, Bill.

You see near the front of the ship through the rigging that's starting to come down as the strain of the wind that is no longer blowing is starting to take effect. You see a figure hunched, gray hair, hat gone. Jacket off. Getting ready to dive over the side. Eggs, throw me. And then I throw Billy. Okay. Defy danger. Dexterity, I guess. Yeah, because you're trying to get him to a specific spot. Yeah, so I wheel up and I'm like, Billy. Aim strong and true. And I'm like, I will. I love you.

I love you. This whole sequence is taking so long. Vings on the deck. I love you both. All right, Billy. Fastball special. And I whip him. Eight. Okay, I think that Billy, Tuck throws you really hard. Yeah. So hard that you're like, I'm going to hit eggs and it's going to carry me over the side with eggs. Okay. Or you can grab onto a line as you're passing by and not get thrown into the ocean, but eggs might get away. I'm going to hit eggs. I'm going to go.

I'm going to go into the ocean with him. Okay. I will face my biggest fear. You're afraid of the ocean? Yeah. I didn't know that. And then also, like as soon as Tuck throws Billy, you know that thing when you're playing with a kid and then you like accidentally hit him too hard? Oh, yeah. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. Bad babysitter move. Yeah, totally. And then Tuck throws him and then he sees like the arc trajectory. He's like, fuck. Oh, no. Did you just line drive our child? That's my kid.

And Billy threw you over the edge. Oh, no. Oh, no. Or who can say where the wind blows vision that you're taking part in right now? Yes. You see eggs throwing one leg over the side and turning to like lower himself down and he makes eye contact. His head cocks his side and he looks confused. Yeah. He sees you arms and legs splayed. And I land on him like a flying squirrel like wrap my limbs around his face.

I imagine eggs was about to do like, you know, like the shitty, like, like salute goodbye. Yeah. And then it's just like, you wrap around his head and he tips backwards over the boat and you hear the wind whistling in your ears as you slam into the ocean. Hell yeah. Ving, you just saw Tuck line drive Billy into a human being over the side of the boat. Yeah. And then you see Tuck look around to see if anyone saw him do it.

Ving just takes two fingers off the deck and points at his eyes and points at Tuck's eyes and then runs and jumps off. Okay. So the second you take your hands off the boat, the deck starts to pitch underneath you. Everybody claps their hands over their ears because while you've been calming the storm around the boat, the winds have been picking up even more. The sky has grown darker. The winds have gotten stronger. And now it's like a deafening squall. I'd like to use fight with honor.

Yeah, sure. Nice. So I got nine. So I got two Chi. Two. And who were you fighting in this regard? I just want to cross a distance between myself and a foe, which is eggs, bypassing all obstacles. Okay. So you're fighting eggs. Like I just want to, because like otherwise it's kind of triggering the move just to get the points as opposed to like being in a narratively appropriate situation. I was just going to drown him.

I actually just wanted to make sure he didn't have anything important and then I was going to kill him. Oh my God. This is the mood. I think maybe that's why one of us would follow you to make sure you didn't, mercilessly kill somebody. He just like caused the death of so many. That's true. Yeah. That is true. This is a thought experiment. Wow. Yeah. As you were flying towards him, Billy's face went from like baseball face to like evil little Bilbo face. Yeah. So that you've got your hold.

You're like, I'm going to come get you and you dive off the side of the boat. I just sprint. And I like the, I like the image of, every step he's, he's running faster and faster and every step like in between his feet being on the thing is like, woof, whoosh, whoosh, whoosh. That's so cool. That's sick.

And then as he jumps, the wind's like, jumps overboard and dives and tries to grab a rope, brings a rope with him and swings down the side of the boat to try and grab Billy, be like Billy and just offer in hand. Cool. So yeah, this will be defied danger dexterity. Dexterity. The rope swing thing. Nice. Seven. Cool. The boat is starting to like, yank against the chain and you're not sure how much longer that'll, that'll hold out.

Actually tuck on the deck as you see Vink go over the side with this rope, you see the like, mechanism that holds the, the anchor in the chain start to like crack, crack, crack. Oh yeah, that giant pinwheel or whatever. Yeah. Oh fuck. And Billy, you're underwater. Eggs is like grabbing at you like you're a, a squirrel that is on his face. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. He's trying to get you off of his face, trying to get you off of his head. What are you doing?

So I want to use lightning in a bottle to figure out what his plan is. Lightning in a bottle. You can make the immaterial material and use it as you will. You can capture a memory, specifically I said a memory and show it to someone else. Use sunlight to brighten a cavern or bring a bottle of joy to one in need as examples. You roll plus dexterity. And on a 10 plus, you capture a small amount and may hold it indefinitely.

On a seven to nine, you still capture it, but you have to use it as soon as possible or it will dissipate. Yeah. So I think here's kind of the stakes. If you're going to get this memory out of him, he's probably going to die. Whoa, what? That's fine. Oh, whoa. Oh my God. I'm willing to make the sacrifice because I, because he also, he did all this. I guess. Yeah. He literally like, he was a mutineer. He literally would have killed you without a second thought. Yeah. Fair, fair.

This is a fair kill, everybody. We all agree. This is a fair kill. You can't make me agree to that. All right. 2d6 plus dexterity. 10. So I succeed. Shit. Oh my God. So you capture a small amount of Eggs Benedict's memory and may hold it indefinitely. Okay. So what does this memory look like as you pull it out? You know what? Okay. So I've like, cause I'm still wrapped around his head and I'm just like holding him under the ocean and my hands over his, his, his mouth.

And, uh, as like his memory comes out, I'm pulling out what is kind of like this like seaweed out of his mouth. And I'm wrapping it around my hand. Fucking cool. So gross and cool. And you feel eggs like struggling against you as you're yanking this weed out of his mouth and it comes loose and you got this bundle of memories in your hand and he goes limp. Shit. Yeah. I feel bad, but I knew he would have done, the same. Yeah. And you, you, do you just like kick back up to the surface? Yeah. Yeah.

And you see Ving a few like meters away with his hand out like Billy. Yeah. Oh, hi. Grab me. We're even motherfucker. I get you. And, uh, and Ving. Good thing you float. Yeah. He comes up like, boom, like a propane tank from the bottom of the ocean. And, uh, and Ving hauls Billy back up onto the deck of the boat. And, uh, it's the same thing. Like as your hand is like touching the boat and coming off as you're climbing back up, it's like bucking as the waves calm and fight.

And it looks like things, at least on this ship have started to calm down a little bit. Like people that were fighting are done. Some people have jumped overboard and are trying to swim away, but, uh, things have are getting under control. Maggie and her loyalists have calmed things significantly. Sweet. And you still hear the like, crap, crap, boom. As the blue period sinks. Oh shit. And the devil's grin.

And on the blue period, you see some people did get into boats, but they're not trying to come aboard there. They're like rowing their escape boats basically further into the devil's grin to get away from you. Wow. Um, and Maggie and Caroline have gathered up, let's say four mutineers that stuck around and weren't like killed or escaped. Which one? There is a kind of chunky, like in his fifties. There's like a dwarf kid who's probably like in the equivalent of his late teens.

There's a pretty athletic looking, uh, human woman probably in her twenties. And, uh, there's an org. Okay. Yeah. Is peanuts still on peanuts? Uh, yeah. Peanuts is still alive, but peanuts is, I guess like changed mind when things got bad and is just like, this is not, this was not worth it. Okay. So I think that Maggie would still tie her up. Yeah, definitely. Changing your mind.

Peanuts was, there was a while where she was like, look, I, Hey, I changed my mind, but I don't want a part of this anymore. Where she was, she was standing next to Maggie being like, yeah, you all get it. Get all these people who are, who are mutineers. These fucks. Hey, you're one of us. No, no, no. I changed my mind. And she's been extra tied up. She's like wrapped like head to toe. Yeah. Uh, and they have been dealt with.

And Maggie is now just talking about like repairs, like repairs are going to have to be done. And she's trying to figure out sort of the next, uh, port of call. How are you planning on escaping? What was your plan? Mutineers? We were, we were just told this is, uh, the dwarf kid. Who's got a way deeper voice than you thought he would. We were just told we'd get paid. That's it. I took us to peanuts and he's like, Hey peanuts, you were one of the higher ups. What do you know?

What I, all I know is that eggs approached us and said, Hey, you want to go to the ship? You want to make some fucking money? And I said, yeah. And, uh, they said that they were going to take the ship. We were going to kill the, kill the crew that needed killing, get rid of the, and she kind of nods towards Maggie and Caroline. And you know, ship be ours. Yeah. That all tracks. Another mystery solved by the boy adventure. A duck like dusts off his hands, right?

Opens a journal called pirates be pirates. The end. So, so sometime later, uh, people are just cleaning up. Basically the storm is starting to abate. You've got probably a couple more hours before things are safe to sail. People are trying to figure out what the fuck Ving did to the boat and are like resetting sales and shit. He's got his hands up. No, no, no, on the stern bow side, starboard under, under, under keel, under the keel. Ving doesn't know any of the boat terms.

So he's just using them. Random. It was all of the boat terms, but not what they apply. And you guys are in, in Maggie's captain's quarters. Uh, and she's just like kicking back in her chair, like, whew. So that was something else. Thanks for, uh, thanks for heading all that up. I appreciate you all doing what you could to kind of keep things under control. I specifically lost control. Yeah. But then you got controlled again and it was, you know, more than I could have done. Certainly.

So, uh, so what'd you learn? Um, well, I got, I got this memory from, uh, eggs. Uh, I take out the seaweed that I've been holding in my hand. And we've never seen this before. Wait, what do you mean? Sorry. You, you have what memory? Yeah. I was able to pull a memory out of him before he died. I just wanted to know what he was up to. And Perel walks up to Billy and like kneels down and is like, wow. Wow. And he holds his hands out. Can I? Yeah.

And he takes it into his hand and he like rubs it between his fingers and smells it and like puts his tongue out and licks it a little bit. That came out of his mouth. Spits onto the ground. What do I do with it? You read it here. I'll show you. Uh, and the seaweed is like, kind of like Braille in a way. Oh, cool. Like you follow the ridges of the seaweed and like, I don't know, like it just makes sense to Billy. Mm hmm. Mm hmm. Sick. Like the root, like his rune. Yeah, that's cool. Right.

The fairy language that like communicates full ideas. Cool. So is it fairy language? Yeah, actually it is. That's wicked. That's so sick. Uh, so Billy, you, what you learn is, um, very simply eggs, was contacted by, uh, you know, some organized crime. You see somebody that looks a whole lot like Fabio, the centaur. Oh, Fabio. I keep reading. Yeah. You like in your mind's eye, you see him like, like pointing at a box and pointing at eggs and going like, put it on the boat and eggs going, I will.

And, and like, basically they were going to take the box with the, uh, Griffin and the box with the foragers gold to a town further up the coast. And they were going to sell it. But, um, Fabio also arranged for some pirates to take control of the boat, which they were then going to sell as well. Wow. Okay. So it started pretty low stakes, but then it got pretty high stakes.

It looks like they were going to take the fake gold and the Griffin up to the nearest town to sell, but they were also going to take over the clear water to sell that as well. So it's probably good that he's not with us anymore. Right guys. I did the right thing, right? Yeah. Billy, it was a life or death situation. You guys were like fighting underwater. Yeah. The water killed him, Billy, not you, right? Yeah. It wasn't like you had the choice to let him not drown or whatever. Yeah.

Caroline, Caroline, like kicks, you kind of nudges you with the toe of her boot from behind where she's standing. They would have killed you. Yeah, probably. No, you can't like I've, I've dealt with pirates before there, you know, there are some pirates that are like freedom and Liberty pirates. And then there are pirates that are like killing, killing plunder pirates. And those were killing plunder pirates. Okay. I had to let some die to Billy. I'm sorry. Uh, and Billy actually.

So when you're thinking about like where they were going to sell the boat, um, you actually see in your mind's eye a place and it's not, it doesn't feel like it's that close. Um, so it probably, it wasn't like a nearest town up the coast thing. It's like a snowy, icy collection of small islands that are covered in wooden buildings that seem to be built out of like the halls of ships and other pieces of wreckage. Oh, cool. And it looks like eggs, eggs is feelings about this place.

He fucking loves it. Is that like a pirate port? Like a Tortuga? Billy could probably spell Laura or he could, if somebody else could, if Billy wants to talk about it. Yeah. So I tell you guys what I see about this town. Does anyone want to spell Laura? Maybe Ving? Can you, do you know anything? Yeah. Well, I'd like to use a sounding board as well. Uh, I re I just took the, the move fount of knowledge. So if I spell Laura about something nobody knows about, I take a plus one forward. Oh, sick.

Yeah. And then if, if Ving helps me, he can use the sounding board move and I can take a plus two, three. Yeah. Three. Cause it's, that's a plus two. So I get a plus three on this. So does anybody know about the snowy town? Snowy town? Anybody? No, nobody does. Anybody, you guys? Nope. Never heard of it. Do you know, have you heard of a snowy pirate town? Uh, I have. No, she, she shrugs. All right. It's about Laura, but snowy. Oh, pirate town. That's a five. It counts to seven. Wow.

Minus one is six plus three is nine. And wait, hold on. Hold on. What? Can you do that math for me again? Yeah. Okay. Here is the math. Five plus two is seven. Plus the one from now. Nobody knowing is, is eight plus the two from being is 10 minus one. Cause I'm extra dumb. And that gives us nine. Now, Billy, I'm going to need an aid. I aid. Wait, stop for a second. Stop. No, no, no, no. Just keep saying numbers at him. He won't be able to defend himself. My brain's filling up with oatmeal.

The plus two thing has to aid for you to get that. That's an aid. Jesus Christ. I was like doing beads. I should have known that. I was like, wait, there's no way I allowed this. So yeah, Vang has to aid first for you to get that plus two. I aid. Okay. So it's a seven, nine, something interesting, but not useful. This is the most important thing. This is the most important thing. It's a long time to get there. It's the most complicated math we've ever done. God, I'm tired.

I have a master's degree in math. It was the most complicated math I've ever done. Fuck you. Has he modest transform? Shrun your equations. You can eat my shit. Yes. Suck yourself off. Optimus prime. Okay. So yeah, tuck. You have, you recall, um, there was a band that you met one day. It was a band that you met one time in your youth that were on tour. Bones of winter. Bones of winter. Cool. Good job. Yeah, that was great. Uh, and they were, um, yeah, real rough.

And they claim to be, uh, like resurrected by a necromancer. That was their thing. I don't know what they actually were, but I touched one of them and they were pretty cold. We were outside, but they were pretty cool. So we just like blew you off. He's pretty cool. He's a cold guy. Um, and they, I mentioned that they were from a place, uh, that was like a small collection of like stony islands out in the middle of the cold Arctic sea.

Uh, I don't have, I know what the play, like I have an idea of the place, but I haven't settled on a name. I was, yeah, I was thinking like the horror frost islands. Ooh, we love saying that those two words. Yeah, that was my fear is that I like the word horror, but I don't want you guys to fucking a dinks about it. No. Yeah. It'd be hard. Like what you suggested. Why not? Four frost, four frost islands. That's pretty good.

Cause they were the first islands that would get the frost in the winter. And they're the first, they're the first furthest South in the North. Yeah. So they're not in kind of either kingdom's domain. They're right on the border, which is why it's kind of like a, like no rules, lawless zone. Yeah. And it's, it's just outside that like wall of fog.

Like, so they don't have to worry about, um, like, like, like, like, like, like, I like that weird marauding things in the fog, but do they trade with the people that are past the fog? Maybe. Yeah. They do. Oh, so fucking cool. The town is made from the wrecks of people from the fog. Yeah. That makes so much sense. So it's all long ships, like with like weirdly strong wood. No, like it's the ships that they attack. Oh, man.

It's like a huge collection of different kinds of, but then also like the ships that would float up. Yeah. Like, wash up on shore. So there's scavengers too. Huh? Yeah. Yeah. And it is kind of a, like their markets probably fucking crazy. The shit that you can get there. Oh yeah. So they're called the four frost islands. Maggie, we gotta go to these islands. They're the fucking coolest things I've ever heard of. And I never got a chance to go.

And if we don't, I'm going to be so fucking mad at you. Well, it probably shouldn't be stop. One, considering it's like a pirate pirate Haven, right? But also this ship can't be sailed as is. We're going to need parts and they have parts in spades. We need to go there to get the ship working again. And you've always talked about how the best way to face your problems is head on. You said that like the last four episodes in a row. And today our problems are pirates. Yeah. All right. Okay.

Four frost islands. It is. Spear made. And then he tries to tackle Tuck. No, no. That's what's happening during the fade out. Tuck is punching Bruno. Okay, so then we do a quick, we do a montage of people making temporary repairs on the Clearwater, getting the sail in a good spot so it can like move. It's not going to be fun. It's not going to be fast, but the ship's not going to sink.

Tuck grabs that like pinwheel thing for the anchor and he like pulls it down really hard to like get it back in position. So they can pull the anchor back up. Yeah. Yeah, the thing's broken. Like it doesn't wind the anchor up. So Tuck's just over the side, like hauling it up hand over hand. Nice. Yeah. And he pulls it all the way up and Ving's been sitting on the bottom the whole time.

And Perel looks over the side of the boat at the wreck of the Blue Period and goes, should we plunder any of that? I mean, there might have stuff. Yeah. Let's do it before we leave. I think that's my vote. What do you think? Sure. I mean, I'm down for whatever. Billy loves a good plunder. Yeah. This can also be part of the montage too. You know what I mean? We don't have to do a whole roll. We don't have to do a treasure roll. Treasure roll. Treasure roll. Treasure roll. They're pirates.

Let me see if I can find like a ship loot. Oh man, I hope we get another fanny pack. That was where we got it from the last time. It was that treasure worm. Oh yeah. Oh yeah. Oh my God. What if it fucking, the fanny pack, what if it blew up on shore on the Four Frost Islands and then we find it? It might. Or maybe these pirates have it. Sean, my life is horrible. Let me have it. Okay. How about I, how would I suggest something?

Jessica, you have to roll a D20 and if you get 19 or above, we get the fanny pack back. No. Yes. Six. We did it. We did it. Should I roll again? Yeah. Three. Three. It's not, it's going down. Don't look. No, no, no. We're adding them up. Nine, 12. 11. That's it. Hold on. Can I just, can I stop you for a second? I did it. Where was it? 19. Okay. Okay. Can I stop you for a second? You can try. You guys are going to a crazy pirate market. Who knows what's going to be there? Yeah.

Let's leave some mystery. Totally. And let us plunder the blue period to get fun stuff to trade. Yeah. Yeah. I like it. Yeah. Okay, cool. All right. So each of you roll a D20. Oh my God. There's your D20. D20. We get to roll our D20s finally. Each of our own. Yeah. 17. Eight. I got eight too. So I want the eight there. Okay. Well. It's just one of you roll again. What is it? 17 is a weapon. Oh, cool. Mm-hmm. It's a saber, like an actual like fencing saber. Oh, sick. It's long.

It's pretty well made. Nothing fancy, but it looks like it's, of solid quality. Oh my God. Shing. I put it on my robe. I feel like one of the musketeers. What are the musketeers? They're muskrat tears. There's these, this is like a little rug rats who are actual rats that Ving used to know back who lived by the docks in his hometown. And he called them the three musketeers. Beautiful. Muskrat tears. So what was the eight? Eight is an old book. Oh. Okay. Do you want that or should I take it?

I can take it. I'll take that book. Yeah. It's a love and lust. I like that. There are other books in the world. Okay. It's a golf digest. I'm begging you to make it a different book. I was thinking of like something like thick and cool, but whatever. Love and lust is great too. What about a book of like old shanties? Oh, I love that. Yeah, I'll take that. Okay. Steady it. Oh man. He could bring that to the rock world. Yeah. Start incorporating old shanties. Shanties into heavy metal.

Piece of shit. Jessica's rolled so many times. It's literally, it kept going to 17, which was Paul's. That's my weapon. 19. Broken, broken compass. Oh, cool. Broken compass. Nice. Yeah. And this is like, they've been pulling up like chests and crates of stuff. And this is, they've been going through and grabbing like, oh, here's some food. Here's some building materials that we used to shore up the boat.

But then you guys each pull out like, oh, here's a book like, oh, cool old sea shanties or like, oh, here's a weird sword. And Billy's got a compass and opens the compass and goes, it's not pointing to anything. Billy's holding it up to the sun. Yeah. Like looking through it, like it won't work. This is point two. Maybe we just haven't found what it points to yet. And you hear Caroline lean into Maggie and go, it's probably just broke. These fucking assholes never seen a broken compass before.

Sometimes things don't work and then you have to fix them. Even a broken compass is right twice times a day. That's not true. That's never been true. And Ving fixes this. Ever since he got those glasses, he's been real smug. And stupider. So then we are going to undertake a perilous journey because now there are far fewer crew members than there were when you started. You guys are actually needed to help with this stuff. Damn it.

So we're going to, one of you is going to scout ahead and one of you is going to navigate. So who's going to scout ahead? I can. You should. You got better eyes. I've got the, the binoculars and I join Crow up in the mast again. Yeah. And Crow is pretty sad. Oh. I just can't believe that all those people I sailed with betrayed me. Do you want to talk about it? I do. Thank you.

I just, you know, I've been feeling really unsure about my place on the ship and I thought that if nothing else, I had, you know, a family. Oh. And it turns out that you can't trust everybody and you can't trust you, Billy. You can trust me. Can I trust you? Yeah. Are you lying to me? No. I, look, I even brought you some beef jerky. And he snatches it out of your hand and shoves it in his mouth. Thank you, Billy. Um, I'm sorry about your family. It's really hard when you can't trust people.

He throws the back of his hand up on his forehead and he goes, Oh, it's okay. Nobody worry about little old Crow. I worry about Crow. Really? Yes. Why do you think I wanted to come back up here? It's not because I like climbing. Look at me. The ropes barely hold my weight and I don't have any upper body strength, but I wanted to come up here to hang out with you and to see how you're doing. Could you tell me that I'm smart? Crow, you're, you're smart.

You know so much about so many things, like the direction of the sky and what different clouds are like, you know, uh, where the, the sun is and the moons are and the coronet, you know, what the, what, what to look for in the waves. You're really good at counting. You have read so many books and you have a great sense of style. I knew it. Thank you for confirming my own biases, Billy. You're welcome. I don't really want to scout ahead right now. Could you? Yes. All right.

I'm gonna, I'm gonna sleep. Here, here, take my, take my blanket. Wow, that was quick. Whoa, holy shit. It's a comfortable blanket. Wee, wee, wee, wee, wee. Uh, yeah, okay, so for navigate, or for scout ahead, uh, Billy, you're gonna roll plus wisdom. Okay. Two D six. Mm-hmm. Okay. Nine. Nine. Okay, so on a nine, you choose one from this list. You get the drop on whatever lies ahead. You discern a beneficial aspect of the trajectory, such as a shortcut, shelter, or tactical advantage.

You make a capital D discovery, which is like cool stuff that you find, uh, or you notice a sign of a nearby capital D danger. What was the second one? You discern a benefit, beneficial aspect of the terrain. Yeah, I want that one. Okay. Uh, then I will factor that in in a moment after somebody decides to navigate. I'll navigate. I'm the boatman. Okay. So navigate is plus intelligence. Great. Six. Oh, fuck. Can I aid him? Yeah, you can try and aid. How is tuck aiding?

Um, I get, I, I, I don't know. How do you navigate on a ship? Well, I'm like doing the thing of making sure that everything like the rudder is working, right? I'm doing more technical boat stuff. Uh, and a lot of navigating is like looking at charts and like measuring where the sun is, the horizon landscape stuff. Okay. Yeah. Maybe like, uh, sorting through the wreckage of the clear water. Tuck finds like a box of like charts and stuff.

And he's like, don't know what the fuck this is, but I think they could probably use it. 11. So that makes it a seven to nine GM chooses one from the list. Oh, I choose one from the list below. Uh, so the choices are, you happen upon a discovery missed by the scout. The going is slow. You wander off the course. The GM says, which, uh, or you encounter a danger, whether or not you're surprised depends on whether the scout has the drop on it. Uh, okay.

So we know that Billy's found, uh, a way to get to the four frost islands faster. We know that Bing is going to miss something and let's figure out the food situation before we decide what that is. Yeah. And I think they put tuck on it because they lost a lot of the, those barrels of spaghetti overboard during the battle. And tuck now has to like physically defend the food stores. Oh, this is like, he's like King Kong. I mean, donkey Kong. So there's a lot of people.

It's like, it's weird how okay everyone is with people just attacking me on a regular basis. They're going to put everything they got into it and just bounce off of Maggie's kind of just letting them like work out their energy against me. It's good training. It's good for them. It's good for him. Everybody's had an exciting few days. It's good to just work off some steam. Tuck has popped a bottle of sabotage. Caroline walks up, smashes it on the deck. No more. Pick a different bottle.

Maybe Ted's on duty, like making pancakes. Cause there's a ton of flour. Oh yeah. So you're also like protecting Ted, like leave Ted alone. Oh, and there's an important job. And I'm also kind of protecting myself from Ted cause he fucking flies off the hand, but he's the only person that knows how to make pancakes somehow. It's four ingredients. There's only like half a cup of syrup left and tuck wears it in a vial around his neck. Yeah. Peanuts is like, I'm coming for that syrup.

And I'm like, come at me, bitch. I'm fucking daring. Where are you? You think you're sweet enough for this? Um, so yeah, basically this is going to determine how much of, uh, Maggie's financial weight is going to go towards repairing the ship, buying food or repairing the ship and buying food, whether or not you're going to have to work for some cash when you get to the four frost islands. Okay. So roll it. Two D six plus wisdom. 1111. Okay. This makes all food. Put it all into food.

That's awesome. What happens? I get to decide off food. You choose one from the list below. Careful management reduces the amount of rations consumed or the party consumes the expected amount of food and you prepare it in an X and the food you prepare is excellent. Describe it. And everyone who licks their lips takes plus one for her. Hell yeah. I forgot about this move. Okay. Yeah. Let's do that second one. Cause it's funny. Okay.

So this means that you're probably going to have to work for some cash when you get to the four frost islands. Or work out some kind of trade work for food kind of thing. So describe how the food is being prepared. I mean, I mean, I guess it's like it's Ted, it's Ted who's preparing. Okay. And he's making grand slams. He's like, it's like a, it's a stack of pancakes for every person. There's whipped cream on top. He got fresh berries from somewhere. Wow.

Uh, and, oh, there's like sausages on the side, thick ones, like bigger than you think you need. Uh, each one has like a heaping helping of hash next to it. Um, what else is breakfast? Orange juice. There's a, there's a coffee. Yeah. There's fresh pressed coffee. Like that other ship had a lot of shit on it that they must've pilfered from like a Gordon Ramsey or Wolf gang puck type vessel. Is that what I was supposed to do? Yeah. Describe how the food is. Describe it. Describe it.

And everyone that licks their lips, that's everybody takes plus one forward. Hell yeah. Stop enough. Um, okay, cool. So yeah, everybody has a wild time eating like gourmet food from Ted, who is just an incredible chef. So one thing people are not hurting for is delicious food, but you come upon something on, let's say day seven, of your trip to the four frost islands. What is it? The toilet's clogged. And it's weird cause it's a, it's a privy tube.

So it means that solid matter has clogged up the tube. It's such a way. Um, yeah, it can either be something dangerous or something interesting. What's is it dangerous that it's clogging the toilet? All our shit is sinking the ship. I mean, it definitely doesn't have to be like a game changing discovery. It could be that the toilets are, the toilets are clogged and nobody can poo. And we've been eating too much. That's why they're clogged. Yeah. Don't, don't you see?

We're eating grand slams at every meal. Maybe it is that people start getting sick. Oh yeah. Which is actually clogging the toilets. Yeah. Oh, a mystery illness. Yeah. Maybe it's that people start getting like weirdly sick. Oh, okay. So yeah, on day seven, you hear peanuts from the brig. They get taken, they get brought out and go like, don't fucking try anything and you can eat food and you can hang out.

But at night we're putting you back in the brick and everybody's asleep below decks hanging in their hammocks. There's a ton of space now for everybody. It's so nice. But you hear peanuts going like, Oh, Oh, keep it down over there. Oh, my, my Tom, bud, I feel fucking weird. Uh, Chuck goes over to her cause he did make that deal where he was supposed to keep her safe or whatever. It's like peanuts. What are you? Are you okay? No, my, I feel so bad, man. It sounds like you're faking it.

It really does, but I'm not. I promise. What is it? Where is it? Her? What's, can you describe the quality of pain you're in inside and a lot here? And he, uh, Ving says, I know this is unorthodox, but it'll help. And he, he, um, it gives her some pipe halfling pipe weed. Come inside and give it to me. Absolutely not. That's literally everything you're doing is making it seem like you're trying to escape from the brig. I think I, I promise that I'm not. Why are you doing it like that?

Peanut promises. And starts, I don't unlock this door. Okay. Unlock the door and I'll stand guard. And peanuts is lying on her side in the brig wrapped up in ropes. Okay. I told you I'm not trying to escape. See? Okay. Now I see it. I can hear it now. Someone else is trying to escape. Wait, is someone else escaping? Discern reality. Six plus wisdom. Six. Oh, I'll, I'll, I'll, I'll aid. Cause I'm, I'm coming down. Yeah. I came down from the mass. Cause, uh, crow's taking over night watch.

And I'm like, what is that sound? You thought it was wicker. Wow. Uh, yeah. So Billy, you see peanuts lying on her side in the brig. Ving and Tucker just look kind of like looking. Everybody's starting to wake up. Vings got a pipe light. It like lit up to her, but just inhale it. Eight. Cool. Okay. That makes minus seven. So you got one question. Uh, what is about to happen? I can, can I, can I, a GM reveal something? I have no idea. You know what? I'm actually literally thinking it is.

I'm thinking whatever this mysterious illnesses, it makes them sound and seem super untrustworthy, even though nothing is wrong. Do you guys have a better, more interesting idea for what this illness might manifest as? What if the illness is like, you start seeing things that aren't there. Oh, maybe one of the crates that got pulled up that Ted mixed into the food was ghost fruit. Oh my God. So everybody on the ship's been eating ghost root for like five days.

So what we're seeing is like elements of the spirit realm. Actually, that's hallucinations. So it makes so much sense. And then like the sweats and stuff like that. And the tummy aches. Cause remember when tuck ate it, your tummy felt bad. Totally. Yeah. Oh, that's so good. I felt like shit. Okay. Yeah. So, uh, so he's been grading it. The sauce. Yeah. Like into the hash. Like he's truffle. He's like taking slices of it. Such a great umami taste. It does taste pretty good. To be fair.

It's delicious umami. Uh, yeah. So that's the peanuts is like, ah, ah, oh, my tummy hurts, but there's a big snake in here. Ving does give her that halfling pipeweed. And she does. She takes a big inhale, holds it for a long time, blows it hard out her nose. She calms down. She goes, Ving, you see him too, right? Who? The deer. And Ving puts his hand on his own chest. Uh, what, what do you mean? Which deer?

And you, as you put your hand on your chest and you connect with the amethyst crystal geode inside, your perception shifts from a moment against your will. You feel like something royal in your stomach and then your vision clouds and standing before you is a magnificent, golden 16 point elk. Hey, Ving. Fuck me. And I think that's where we're going to end it for this week. I'm your game master, Sean O'Hara. Joining me as always playing Tacoma dome, the barbarian Abdul Aziz. So long everybody.

Playing Ving, the half elf druid, Paul Oppers. Take care. And playing fat Billy, the halfling thief, Jessica tie. Bye everyone. Thank you to Aaron Reed for our intro and outro music as always. And all of the original music, uh, the original music, uh, on the show has been composed by Aaron, which you can find on SoundCloud, a spell or SoundCloud account. Uh, thank you to all of our supporters on Patrion and online and around the world. Thank you to you for listening.

You can find us on the internet at spell or most places. We'll catch you next time. Bye. And so ends the tale of adventures three who tried the best they can. Though dumb and scared and lost, they be fun. Time. And though our journey may be like a conclusion, we will not leave you without a resolution. Return next week to hear some more whilst you commute or do your chores. And for you, I'm glad you're here. Bye. Lately. Oh.

If you like Spout Lore and you want spelt more of it, go to patreon.com slash Spout Lore for exclusive bonus content, bonus games, exclusive merchandise, and more. So here I sit, singing to you an adventure that is worth sharing. Tuck is the brute, he knows not his home, he loves to sing and fight. Thing is half-elf, he shifts his shape and wields a spear with great might. Billy's a thief, his tiny size does max the largest heart.

Best and brightest they may not be, but their friendship outweighs their smarts. So gather round, friends, and listen close. For the tale's about to start. For the city of Wickport, boarding the Clearwater under the command of Mender Maggie Cole. They also, as a parting gift, received two bookworms from Farah because she knew you would waste one of them.

I honestly, like, I was trying to find an in point so that when we walked away from her office, immediately one of them flew back, but it never happened. So we just have to. That would have been really funny, but it didn't happen. And you know what? It's really handy that you have two, actually. You were given a shard of obsidian from the tale of Black Spire as a parting gift.

Ving revealed to Tuck that he had swapped an obsidian coin for one of Black Spire's scales, which has been gifted to Tuck as a guitar pick. Yeah. Imbued with the power of Ving's Eye of the Tiger move, which will allow Tuck, at some point, presumably, to see through the eyes of, potentially communicate with, Black Spire. Then we travel. To Wickport. And you boarded the Clearwater. And we set sail for parts unknown.

Billy heading to the crow's nest with a bird-like man crow to keep an eye out for danger. Ving heading to the front of the boat and using his elemental mastery to become an absolute smash hit. Just a total fan favorite. And Tuck just kind of being told to carry boxes around. Carry one box. Correction. And that. Being told where to put it for a couple of hours. Yeah.

And due to whatever sort of failure in this chain, Tuck was brought below decks to shove the box in a hidden compartment by Bozen Eggs Benedict. Mm-hmm. And through a little bit of skullduggery, well, reverse skullduggery, I guess, the revealing of skullduggery, Billy determined that there seems to be a mutiny of Bruin. And Tuck determined that there's a smuggling operation, also a Bruin. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm.

Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Billy and Tuck headed below decks as Ving distracted the crew with a rousing song and dance a la Gene Kelly and cracked open the case that Tuck had been carrying around, discovering a little griffin, a half parrot, half monkey creature snoozing after Billy put him to sleep with his fairy magic.

Upon discovering this creature, they heard footsteps swiftly approaching this compartment. And that is where we find our heroes. Now, what do you do? I grab Billy and I throw him in the box with the griffin. I slam the top on it. Okay. Give me a defy danger dexterity to do all that fast enough. Seven. So you do all that and you are panting with panic and exertion as Perel rounds the corner. Oh, fucking thank God. What's going on? What are you doing? I'm here to solve the mystery.

It's a fucking griffin in here, man. Oh, what? Come look. Oh. Fuck. Yeah. And Perel steps into the room. And just as he crosses the threshold, an arm whips out from around and gets him around the neck. Oh. And a body steps into view. And it's the shirtless bear tattoo. I kick the door into his face. Into Perel's face. Yeah. I guess both. Shit. Go ahead and roll a defy danger strength. Eight. Okay. You hit Perel. Perel, for sure. And Perel goes, ah!

And pushes this young man back into the crates on the other side of the door. And you have just a moment to react. I jump over the crumpled heap that is Perel and onto the guy. Okay. Another defy danger dexterity. Seven. Okay. You start wrestling with him, basically. Like, you're obviously stronger than him, but he is wriggling out of your grip and there's a lot of grunting and exertion. Billy, you hear a fucking kerfuffle. Okay. And I cannot reach the top of the box. Oh, right. Yeah.

I'm jumping. Let me out. Are you going to try and get out? Yeah, I guess so. Okay. How are you trying to get out? Are you going to, like, climb up or try and knock the box over? Yeah. I'm going to try to climb up using the breathing holes. Okay. Great. Defy danger dexterity. Suck at this. Five. Okay. You climb. You stick your fingers in the hole and you start pulling yourself up to the top and you get to the lid and you realize.

When Tuck slammed it shut, all the nails went back into place and you're stuck in here. I'm stuck. And you don't know if it's the kerfuffle or your lack of concentration, but you start hearing, like. I freeze, like. Oh, God. And we cut up to Ving. Yeah. You're just finishing your second song. What was the second one? Oh, it is a love ballad to a mermaid. Oh, yeah. Yeah. But Ving saw the sketchy young. Smuggler with the bear tattoo slink off and then run below decks.

So he gets a guy in front of him, like a gap tooth sailor. And he is playing the concertina and gets his hands inside of his and he's mimicking and the guy's just like, uh-huh. I'm doing it. Just backs off. Yeah. And jumps over the deck. Whoa. And grabs one of the ropes at the side and swings down through and into the porthole. Just like sick move. And tries to pin this bear tattoo kid. Fuck yeah. So I'm going to say that's probably light as a feather. Yeah. That's 10. Okay. Yeah.

You put the concertina in this gap tooth dude's hands and he starts going, I'm doing it. I'm doing it. And then half a second after you let go of his hands, it's like. I was like, but everybody's it's like a jovial booing. Like everybody's having a pretty good time, especially as you jump up into the air. Grab a line and swing off the deck and then back into the ship. But you basically you swing through a window like outside of this little chamber.

As you see tuck charge out of the room and start wrestling with this dude. Perfect tuck. You see just out of the corner. Your eye Ving has arrived somehow seemingly out of thin air. And this kid is starting to he's wrestling his hand toward his belt. And when I see Ving, I go. Ving. Ving. The true boy adventure man. Throw me your hat. Throw my hat real quick. It lands on his head perfectly. Beautiful. And as you lift a hand from this fight, you're actively in.

You see the kids hand shoot toward his belt. Now that he's got a hand free. Okay. What do you do? Smack him in the face really hard. All right. I was picturing you doing. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Oh. Oh. Oh.

The other side great seven uh so that makes tucks nine a ten and tuck just fucking wallops this kid in the side of the head roll your damage two yeah you just wallop him and he goes and his hand is coming back up with a knife and just as he's like getting ready to slap ving's other hand comes in and completes the ice cream sandwich that is your two hands in his face and he just like crosses his eyes and his hand lets go of the knife for a second I'll step on the knife defying your dexterity eight yeah he reaches for the knife and you just kick it out of the way and he's like but he's not gonna stop fighting and you hear uh from inside the room and a box kind of jumbling back and forth billy this thing is about to wake up yeah I I'm just like hi little cute baby bird I am a friend I don't know what sounds you like bird noises or monkey sounds that kind of covers both of them thankfully give me a defy danger charisma ten okay you see its eyes start to open because it's got eyes on the side of its parrot head and they blink open and one of them just looks like a bird and it's like oh my god I'm a bird I'm a bird I'm a bird I'm a bird I'm a bird I'm a bird it's right at you and it doesn't do anything okay but it's looking at you very like what do I do I also think what do I do and I put out my hand kind of like to give it a sniff hey friend I mean no harm I am also stuck in the box with you together together we can survive the box it doesn't do anything but that is the success is that right now it's not doing anything uh and we'll cut back to the fight really quick this kid is he's trying to get out of your reach basically he's trying to get one hand free uh there's a stool nearby so tuck grabs that and just slams it on his chest you know like a chair leg on either side and then sits on it okay that's gonna be defied ninja strength eight okay roll uh d6 four okay you get that stool and in that movement but just before you slam it on his chest he cracks you in the jaw just with a fucking just with a meaty balled up fist just whack but it's the only hit he's able to get before you hold him down completely fucking good hit dude he's like you want another one let me up I'll give you all the hits you want I'm I don't know I'm that I was good for that one that was solid though you come on let me up I mean I felt that in my nose you hit me in the jaw I felt it in my nose yeah call that a bone shaker let me up I'll give you another one I think should I let him up I mean do you think that he do you think that we could take him I mean yeah probably but it would probably belabor this whole situation don't talk about me like I'm not here let me up and show me what you got big guy somebody somebody roll something to get this kid to cool it why don't you just cool it pal you're a little smuggler because he's a 21 year old sailor with a full chest tattoo he's never cooled it a day in his life uh you've got a bear tattooed on your chest you know I used to be a bear once in a while that is not gonna get him to calm down you know it's good for you you'll shut the front door before I maul you dude listen to what we have to say calm down please plus charisma eight okay he just slumps okay fine why are you trying to hurt us why are you snooping around this is none of your business well I mean we work for maggie there's a word box in here it kind of is our business uh uh sorry really he's trying to be like snippy but he's having a hard time I feel like it's none of your business uh I I disagree who are you working for on the ship I don't have to tell you I'm working for the ship you know I'm working for the captain and he like salutes like ahoy you know sailing okay well we've heard through certain circles and tuck gestures at the box that uh maybe there's a little bit of a mutiny afoot bear guy you ever heard of that word discern realities six okay laid okay yeah okay so you get one question from the discern realities list what should I be on the lookout for uh he when you start talking about the mutiny just before he's like I don't know what you're talking about looks terrified that you might know oh yeah and then I remember oh fuck billy's in a box with a griffin what what you should have started with that billy and run over the box yeah the lid you can pop it off and billy is I am feeding the the griffin some of the dried fruit that I had it's still in my pockets that were loose and dangling around nice yeah it's like reaching up with one of its front talons and just like puts it up into its beak yeah so this one is dried wapple which is very nice but I like it better when it's fresh off the tree and it's like slowly getting up and sitting on its back feet and just taking fruits and nuts from billy and then it looks up at ving and ving says hello there we mean you no harm hello hey buddy you're real neat uh billy you hear that too uh-huh oh what yeah oh because of the ring uh no what like it just says hello hello hi hello oh okay oh it puts another night in ving not talk to the griffin no it can it's right now just saying hello okay he's most yeah he's saying hello and griffin as well hello hello that's what ving oh fuck yeah my friend thank you for bringing me these nuts these nuts you heard me I like this guy I wish to be uh removed from this box now please no problem the box is open you're free to go this is billy are we the nut boy merci please don't call him that and billy you here yes anytime let me see if I have more you must excuse the way I speak to your little friend I do not have a what shall I say mastery of the human languages that's all right but I appreciate you removing me from this present I appreciate you being calm and cool and collected in french that's really neat thank you it is uh again not france different place fantasy we come up with it later uh but there from now I think I will leave we no oh please stick around for a while it uh like hunches down a little bit and starts to ruffle its feathers when you say no perhaps perhaps we can help each other I helped you you can help us there's a lot of people who are gonna freak out when they see that you're gone and we need people not to freak out on a boat you've been on a boat before right you're a pirate griffin aren't you I am just myself I have no vocations but uh what is in it for moi uh where are you trying to get from where where are you where did they find you where are you trying to be I have been many places many times in my travels and by that I mean I was taken as a chick and traded from person to person and I wish to not be done so anymore do you even know where you come from I come from a beautiful place of palm trees and of beautiful fruits and nuts well that's where we are trying to get to I feel like you may be lying to me yeah because I made this face really questioning my own words as long as I am treated well I would live anywhere well I do love to see new places I'm a traveler at heart we've got a lot of people who are going to be there for us we've got a lot of fruit and nuts with us and a lot of good people in this room everyone else sucks all right roll a parlay 2d6 plus charisma we've got fruit and nuts for years nine nine okay can I help yes please you get the fruits and nuts yeah I find I find some more in my back pockets and it's like lots of crunchy crunchy nuts and also some protein cubes mr bird baby boy thing I have more snacks to eat I have more snacks for you if you want to eat them oh my hand you can or I could put them on the floor of the box roll 2d6 plus bond seven okay yeah so after you're like yeah we're pretty cool and there's nuts and everybody else sucks shit it reaches down and takes a nut with its like back monkey paw out of billy's hand and kind of trades it to the other monkey paw back and forth thoughtfully is like proceed uh what do we want to do?

What do we want to do with this guy? I mean you don't want to go back in the box but we need to make sure that nobody knows that we know that you're in there what if we hide him under our stuff and present him to maggie that's what I imagine as proof of mutiny and also this guy yeah chuck says from where he is he's still sitting on the seat you can't no you can't chuck's you know what they no don't cut me off this is my life is hanging in the balance you know what they do to mutineers?

What do they do? Fucking hang them bro oh that sucks you shouldn't have started a mutiny dude I didn't start a fucking shit man okay whose idea was it?

Uh uh I don't know that's all he says you can see him shaking his head back and forth going uh I don't know and trying to think of something witty to say and he just keeps shaking his head back and forth and it you don't even have to roll for this this kid is not the brains of the operation well maybe you can tell that to maggie I shout from my box I can't no I don't even also this guy doesn't know that billy's in the box so he thinks that the griffiths do I can't look I didn't know this thing could talk man I don't even want to be here anymore what is that I didn't even know what was in the box they don't tell me what's in the boxes spill your guts before we spill your guts okay uh we could yeah we'll do a discern realities and then I can just holy shit monster plus wisdom 11 okay three questions who really is in can we know that one yeah it but it's for sure I can confirm it look I know you say things that you know but you can hear from me what if I say it too it's ex-benedict man it's ex-benedict what here is useful or valuable to us wait you guys knew it was you're you're acting like this is not a surprise to you yeah we already knew we kind of already knew you guys are not being so sneaky I thought we were being so sneaky what's with being your sneaky smile at each other out on the upper decks you can see that yeah I saw it all you gotta get me out of here man I can't I don't want to deal with haunted boxes anymore anymore what was the other one yeah what's what's here what here is useful and valuable to us um okay look eggs is like making a lot of promises to a lot of people but like I know that it's been about 45 seconds of me uh being defenseless and I don't want to even do it anymore so like if you were to get him out of the way quick before he could spring the trap the whole thing probably fall apart trap what's about to happen uh well I mean like it's I don't know the plan was like two days from now to get to where we gotta go we gotta like dip around this really kind of dangerous like reef area and that was gonna take us pretty far out to sea and that was when eggs was gonna go like do it and we were gonna go fuck yeah and I was gonna take care of things but that's two days away but if he if he thinks that the jig's up he might do it early what here's not what appears to be okay look you want some like good info you want the like good stuff the info come here lean forward no just tell us from down there man just lean in a little I don't want to and he shoots his hands up and he's like I'm gonna get you he tries to hit you in the face again I had to try you understand I had to try try what he tries it again okay all right fine there's a ship following there's a ship following us and they were gonna fucking love this guy's vibe yeah they were gonna meet up with us and they were gonna help with the mutiny and we were gonna ship that was the plan oh shit so that means even if we deal with eggs he like we're gonna have a fucking another ship on our tail regardless yeah no no but that doesn't mean that my info is not valuable it means that like if you plan right you could ambush the other ship this thing's fucking huge oh yeah ship battle never done one of those battleships you have you have done one of those it was the climactic event in a season that's what this guy's saying you guys don't remember even I know you fought the fucking what's that the purifier yeah yeah your quests are your quests are famously daring thank you I do know the words I know you guys by name and by deed uh you used to work for eggs now you work for us you got that yeah word man sure yeah totally what do you guys what's like slap him in the face you got that yeah I got it what's the salary like five five gold coins a day oh yeah that's like more than I make in a month are you serious yeah that sucks shit gold is really valuable what's your pay yeah like like five silver a week five gold coins a day sounds fucking amazing I'll do whatever you want okay yeah five gold coins a day you want me to punch myself in the face I'll do it five gold coins not really that one was for free you make it six and I'll do it again I don't want you to do it again stop it three gold coins if you're playing okay all right cool let me know okay okay okay I went too early that time I went too early he goes I punch him in the balls because I expected it riding my cargo shorts okay all right I'm cool we're cool what if we get him to meet us at maggie's office separately yes yes yeah because we don't want people to see us together what's this are you working with this box why does it keep giving you ideas billy's like trying to jump up but he's like yeah I think keeping this mystery alive is working for us yeah okay I'll go I'll go to the I'll go to the captain's cabin okay yeah meet us there in 20 minutes man okay and we'll go there right now and he gets up and just as he's walking away he turns around and goes and he tries to lunge you one more time like really just like does a hard tap on on his cargo short air and he just crumples into a box and goes oh god stop doing that man I'm just I'm a fighter at heart bro I know but you're not good at it or at least follow through oh man okay I'll get you one day but not today because I'm getting five gold coins six if I no dude okay all right I'll see you guys in a bit what's your name ah shit I thought I was gonna get away before you asked me that as bruno bruno because of that and he points at his bear tattoo yeah he points at his bear tattoo and he realized that when tuck was sitting on him he like drew all over it and it has like a hat and a monocle now oh actually it looks pretty tight okay bye and he runs away like sprints away that guy's like at 11 all the time and he dives over a bunch of boxes he goes and he misses and he gets back up and he runs away should we take this griffin to maggie's quarters yeah um hey birdie do you want to hide under my shirt fruits and nuts fruits and nuts billy's like trying to like be like come here and uh it looks at ving and he goes the boy is trying to constrain me within his short folds what do I do he's just giving you a a solitude to enjoy your fruits and nuts in ah okay think of it as the the cool canopy of a palm tree ah we're going to he crawls up under billy's shirt awesome and it is the opposite of a cool canopy of a palm tree it is a sweaty jungle in there and he goes I just like my humid homeland and billy you are mystified by the sensation of soft gripping like human-like paws and then sharp talons and fur and feathers just a whole bunch of feelings so nice and horrible and uh you guys head to maggie's office and the camera lingers just a moment upon the other box and we cut to maggie's cabin maggie oh yeah hey what's what's going on wait is carolyn in the room yes she's leaning up against a desk can we talk to maggie alone please she looks at maggie maggie nods and caroline leaves thank you what's going on okay so I know we've only been at sea three hours but we're going to be there in a minute so I'm going to be there in a minute and I'm going to we uncovered a mutiny one it has been longer than that look at a watch to a mutiny I can't read analog clocks okay what do you mean analog clocks are there other kinds of clocks yeah there's digital yeah what the fuck is the digital when you count on your fingers that is not accurate tuck what are you doing this many hours what do you mean a mutiny hold on don't shush me I'm just saying that if people hear this that are onto the mutiny they're gonna mutiny right now she uh walks up to the door opens at a crack and goes no one gets within six feet of this door and she closes it what do you mean a mutiny I lift up my shirt I mean this and it comes it uh yeah and being you hear it go I am revealed I am revealed you and uh it actually does go like squawk and fly right at maggie wait friend she catches it and maggie goes whoa what the hell is this thing and then wickers there and she freaks out oh my god her hackles are up she climbs up a bookcase yeah she's just sitting on the top of it like what in the diamond hills is this thing it's it's a griffin it's a pirate griffin it's cargo it's smuggling goods oh okay all right can I can somebody else take it please yeah here hand it to billy oh thank you yes this small boy will hold me not be a large woman whom I do not trust because she has no fruit in that not like this one here billy you just hear fruit nut okay but you have to be quiet so this thing was on the ship yeah down below decks like that's where it's at yeah down below decks like that's where it's at down below decks like that's where it's at like on the bottom deck benedict made me put this fucking box in there benedict when we were trying to uh check it out they got attacked by that dumb kid with the big popeye arms and the bear chest tattoo yeah bruno he's a real card but he confirmed it like there is a mutiny afoot he said when we got further out to some like reef there's some yeah the some horn we have to go around that's really we have to slow down and it's secluded and we have to go around and we have to you know that pirate ship that's not a pirate ship yeah that's their that's their smuggling ship they're going to be meeting us there around the reef in a day or two I guess that's what he said the one that was following us yeah oh oh oh man okay where'd you get eggs oh he I mean we got him we got him in the principalities before we came over we got him in black glass and I did think it was kind of weird we got to wickport and he was gone for like too long when we got to port uh but he just said he was on a bender yeah I guess he had connections there god on my own ship didn't even notice slipping up getting old okay I mean we've got bruno working for us now oh good okay um I could always just send caroline take him grab eggs can we trust caroline what do you mean well she was she was spying on us the whole time you know what if what if she's in on it well she was spying on you on my orders I see okay yeah it makes sense it makes a lot of sense show she works for you okay no no no no billy don't get me wrong it's always good to be wary of those around you to the point of paranoid suspicion it's always important to be vigilant in all ways ving rings behind her and pulls out a bag of pipe halfling pipe where are you guys getting who's your dealer everyone's gonna stop smoking this shit well I mean I guess we could outrun him or we could just vice him head on yeah what about when the horn we turn around and face him oh yeah we set up an ambush ambush we do a shit battle we've never done that ah that really that's news to me uh okay yeah so we'll wait until we get to uh what's the name of this it's like it's like rocks basically it's like a huge field of jagged rocks devil's grin okay that's a pretty good name all right so we're gonna get to the devil's grin in uh yeah like a day and a half I guess we wait because if we call it too early then eggs will know something's up or his crew will know something's up they must be checking in somehow also that halfling woman uh knew the smuggler song and she was acting real suspicious like so I think that maybe she might be one of the mutineers halfling woman uh-huh oh peanuts yes okay we'll keep an eye on her too and the the griffin goes fruit nuts fruit nuts fruit nuts uh in the meat in the meantime you might want to keep this thing under wraps she points at the griffin I have an idea right oh well I'm stuck up in the crow's nest with bernard and bernard doesn't really come down here so I could just bring the griffin up with me yeah that would work all right what if it flies away you won't fly away my shirt's really tight okay I really shouldn't trust that as the fail safe but I guess I can't not he's in a bulk all right then uh yeah keep an eye out see if there's anything else you can learn about the mutineers and then in a couple and when we get to devil's grin we'll spring it who do you trust on this boat uh caroline greg us so anyways find out what you can about the mutineers and in a couple days we'll we'll see I'll we'll we'll take care of this I guess okay sounds good okay good luck you as well all right and you go griffin yeah knock knock knock and uh the door opens and it's caroline and she has bruno in a headlock this guy tried to get in like five times every time I turned him around and beat his ass he tried again and she's like guys you didn't tell her that I was coming she she really knows how to hurt a person emotionally oh so mean you gotta help you gotta tell her let me go oh yeah this bruno he's working with us now oh you said that you didn't say he was coming here yeah we forgot okay great caroline let him go and he tumbles to the ground and he gets up and he sits there in like an iron man pose with like one fist on the ground one knee up and he's like just as I planned and he runs it and goes cut yeah to later on after you guys explain you guys explain what you're doing and then you're like oh my god I'm gonna die I'm gonna die and then you're like oh my god I'm gonna die I'm gonna die I'm gonna die I'm gonna die I'm gonna die what bruno's deal will be which is I guess confidential informant oh yeah that's a good idea perel I you know what I like to think that I'm the master of this operation and I am so excited that we're gonna stop a mutiny together it's gonna be cool yeah I don't really have anything to contribute I was gonna say what are you planning on doing I'm not sure you all came to me we just wanted to fill you in on what was going on thank you you're old you have ancient wisdom what have you heard about the bruno's deal and I'm like I'm gonna die I'm gonna die I'm gonna die ancient wisdom that's what you think I have this is the first time I'm saying it I'm hoping it's true I could tell you what kind of clothing was in style 200 years ago that's the kind of wisdom I got well how how how long are you gonna want to hang out in that closet for oh um I am kind of hiding now okay in the closet yeah no sorry I'm just I you know I fall into my old ways the magic like I've whatever no I'm ready to go I can do this I've been training I trained look at me and he like taps his chest and taps his abs there's a little bit of pudge around his midsection to be sure but he's ready to go he's a man of action he's dirk adventure man of action you've been doing your your katas yeah I've been practicing cool you look great thank you you can do it okay so what do you need from me well I was gonna take this bird up with me but if you were hiding I was gonna maybe give it to you but if you want to be dirk adventure boy then you be the adventure boy that you were born to be okay all right yeah actually hiding the thing in this closet is a pretty good idea I want to be a dirk adventure boy of action but and uh ving you hear it go this man is so bald and small but fruit did not he have and yeah uh perel will hold on to the griffin in the closet because he's pretty sure that nobody comes to this closet and yeah in the meantime what is each of your plans for the next couple days in preparation I guess yeah ving has knowledge of like the rigging and stuff right we've been we've established that so maybe he can like go around and kind of like saw something halfway or like set it up so it's a trap so we can like do something quick turn yeah drop oh yeah so you can take control of the ship really quickly quickly yeah that's really cool surprise yeah I like that a lot okay um other things that you might want to do are find out just how many people in the crew are prepared to mutiny I can do that okay I can pretend to be a disgruntled employee that's really good I also want a mutiny I've only been here for two days yeah I hate it you can start with peanuts yeah I'll talk to peanuts and billy I don't know yet okay we can even start with like talk to peanuts and then we can do that okay I can do that okay I can do that okay so we'll start with uh ving so you're gonna go around and try and create some sort of uh contingency plan to take control of the ship 2d6 plus intelligence oh man can I use my history of boat knowledge no nice 11 oh my god okay massive fucking roll so boats are in his bones yeah it's true you have a deep relationship with vessels uh so tell me uh so tell me what you're going to do with the ship uh I'm going to go around and try and create tell me what you want to do this will ensure that basically when ving decides he wants to you will be in full control of like the sails the steering everything what if because like you have experience with like ice racers which are very mechanically advanced so what if you were able to like rig it up so that you could take control of all of the ships from the like I like back a few seasons ago from like one point in the boat right yeah he was going around and like tying this rigging and making it look like it's all set up but having like this extra rope people won't really notice going to this other knot and like this other cleat over here he uh has a line coming up from the rudder that uh is going to the helm that is kind of like on the back and something that he can quick steer from that's great and so basically there's a point on the ship that is not at the helm where ving can just take control I like that a lot creating like simple machines and stuff out of stuff that's just on the ship yeah yeah like pulleys and everything he's been like whittling down pulleys and making his own stuff maybe there's like innocuous lines that like if you cut them it like removes control from like the main I was yeah I was thinking of like something that will disable the helm yeah in a moment's notice sick yeah that's really cool he does it all at night whenever he wants to cool and during a mess because he doesn't need to eat so everybody is down below decks in the galley yeah that's really cool and yeah it makes sense because like they all sleep and eat in shifts just for like there's always people on deck but you've figured out the points where like people are changing that over so you'll have some time alone cool and tuck has begun to walk amongst the crew to suss out the rest of the interlopers yeah and I want to like really just be like fucking shit maggie's been like reaming me out because I don't know anything about sailing and I said I did it's fucking shit I don't know anything about sailing and I said I did it's fucking shit bullshit man if I had my druthers like he rips a page off a word of the day calendar I would fucking oh god do whatever you know he's saying this to peanuts he's like in the mess he's like fucking this meal is so tiny so hungry so hungry and mad and like willing to like follow a charismatic and angry leader he rips another page off the word of day calendar and throws charismatic on the ground so roll a 2d6 plus charisma seven so peanuts is sitting there drinking from a halfling sized mug of grog and is like oh fuck yeah bud I hear you we're fucking sailors bud like she does who she thinks she is right I know right some fucking who's it washed up whatever comes onto the ship and starts being like hey I know more about sailing than you do I hate these fucking financier sort of people yeah and her whole vibe is that she thinks she's better than us yeah what is up with that yeah it's like oh I'm you know yeah it's like fucking the armor and stuff and the way that she talks like using all the right words I know it's like fuck look like not everybody has the right you know like diction yeah rips another page on the calendar not everybody thinks when they fucking talk and they can't you know what I mean yeah man fucking for sure so look I shouldn't be saying this out loud but we're fucking planning a little special something so you want some things to change maybe you fucking uh maybe you uh you know fucking you know yeah I'm in I'm like huge so like I can do whatever you want I just fucking don't want to work for her anymore yeah can I be a part of your thing can I parlay uh yeah she's definitely inviting you so you don't necessarily have to parlay but if you want something extra you can ask for it yeah yeah that's the thing is she's not like come on here's everybody that's in the crew she's just like yeah if you're fucking interested oh can I can I have your tater tots I don't know what fucking no but okay fine what's your parlay here dude can you introduce me to some of the other people that are I feel like I'm on the outside I don't know anybody what are you offering her like I guess like like I'll look out for her if like shit goes bad okay yeah yeah so that is a promise you're making uh-huh keep that in mind okay is that you will watch out for her okay okay well maybe yeah roll for it 2d6 plus charisma for a parlay fuck seven okay on a seven and nine you have to give her concrete assurance of something right now okay yeah no I think I could you know I could fucking use somebody your size keeping an eye out for me yeah I got my ways but you know it's a big world I'm a small lady yeah how about you uh you go beat the shit out of ted over there and uh you can come you can come aboard I can introduce you to people I look over at ted what's his vibe ted is wiry he's like 160 pound greyhound muscle huge scar down his face he's sharpening a knife on his own wooden leg and he stabs it into the table and he spits out his own tooth because it just was falling out because he's so much of a pirate and I lean into peanuts and I'm like okay ted seems to have like a missing limb and his teeth are just falling out yeah and it's fucking his thing like what do you want what do you want me to say I don't know he He just seems like…

I think he's also talking like… But Maggie is the best. Isn't she amazing? I would do anything for her. Yeah, totally. He's like, I love this captain. She's… It's finally… It's good to have some direction again on this. On the seas. She knows her stuff. And I'm like, he just seems differently abled. And I don't want to beat him up. Hey, look, man. You don't know Ted. Obviously. Yeah. He'll beat your ass. Okay, fine. If you don't think you can do it, that's fine. I just… No, it's fine.

No, no, no. It's fine. It's fine. I'm not going to take this seriously. It's fine. Okay, hold on one second. I just need him to attack me first. And I'm like… And I'm like, hey, Ted. Yeah? Your… Your… Nose. I'll kill you. Such a sailor. And he dives across the table. He grabs that knife. Out of the wood. And he dives across the table at you. Okay. I guess I'm fighting him. Yeah. Defy danger. Because he jumps at you first. He surprises you. Yeah. I guess I take the knife hit.

And I'm just like… I want to just take him and slam him into the ground. Okay. 2d6 plus constitution. 13. Okay. So you said you were taking the hit. Yeah. So roll a d6. Three. Okay. Yeah. So you feel ostensibly… Theoretically, you feel his knife. You feel his knife. You feel his knife. You feel his knife. You feel his knife. You feel his knife. You feel his knife. You feel his knife. You feel his knife. But not that much. Yeah. And he's just like… I'll kill you. Okay, man.

I'll kill you too. Roll a hack and slash. Nine. Yeah. So he pulls his knife out. And he stabs you again. So roll your damage. And then also a d6. Ten. Five. Oh my gosh. You deal him ten damage. Which is going to knock his shit in the dirt. So how do you know?

Knock him out I really don't want to hurt this guy too bad so I just I shove him I push like I I put my hand on his chest and I push him backwards and then I continue to push and then I push him up and over the table the like long table that's behind him and then I push him into the trash can behind and I slam him down pretty hard and then I just put the lid on the trash can and the last thing you hear as you're putting the lid on is I'll kill you and he's out cold in the garbage can and peanuts is like nice one bud thanks I got stabbed a couple of times there yeah and you took it like a fucking champ bud thanks all right you know what you're in okay cool all right you uh you come meet us after dark okay cool tell you everything you need to know where what part of the ship uh you'll know because I'll tell you right now it's at the front okay yeah cool yeah you're a fucking killer bud thanks yeah man good to have you on the team I'm killer yeah I'm so happy to be on the team absolute murderer you are yeah totally I'm I'm a cold blooded just see the fucking blood lust in your eyes but I love it you just got you know you're the kind of person that you know what I I love blood nice and peanuts walks away but she keeps turning around and going nice is peanuts into me she gives you two fingers nice okay cool peanuts and she goes away and then you see her crawl up and peep over a bunch of boxes okay nice I'm gonna go up top she's gone okay uh yeah so tuck has successfully infiltrated the mutineers has billy devised a plan for helping with the preparations yeah so billy's gonna use connections oh!

Oh cool and he would like to spread rumors about eggs to create tension between the mutineers fuck yeah to create distrust between them okay 2d6 plus charisma fuck 4 plus 2 is 6 do I have something what does luck of the fairy do uh remember the um one of the fairy child moves is turn a 6 into a 6 and you're like oh my god a woman's a woman a woman a woman a woman a woman a woman a woman a woman a woman a woman a woman a woman a woman a woman a woman a woman a woman a woman a woman a woman a woman a woman a woman a woman a woman a woman a woman a woman a woman a woman a woman a woman a woman a woman a woman a woman a woman a woman a woman a woman a woman a woman a woman a woman a woman a woman a woman a woman a woman a woman a woman a woman a woman a woman a woman a woman a woman a woman a woman a woman a woman a woman a woman a woman a woman a woman a woman a woman a woman a woman a woman a woman a woman a woman a woman a woman a woman a woman a woman a woman a woman a woman a woman a woman a woman a woman a woman a woman a woman a woman a woman a woman a woman a woman a woman a woman a woman a woman a woman a woman a woman a woman a woman a woman a woman a woman a woman a woman a woman in the mutiny and I just say stuff I don't know like hey how's it going oh uh um me yeah it's going great uh would you like a dinner roll there was extra oh uh yeah okay sure and this pirate like puts earth this sailor puts their broom down and takes a roll and it's like thanks kid no problem I have a lot if you want another uh I'm not gonna say no to free rolls sure here you go hey no problem just don't you know wink wink oh I'm not gonna tell anyone cool hey what we're tight I'll look out for you okay all right yeah we're tight if I have extra I'll come back around later sounds okay cool thanks thanks kid bye he shoves it into his pouch and uh the seven to nine on that is like you get something close okay uh billy does not remember who he was told was on the mutineer crew so he's just putting the rolls on anybody yeah and he's definitely gonna sew tension who with who can say so uh I go up to another person I think is in the mutiny yeah hi hi hey I don't know I don't know about you but did you notice that that guy got extra food yeah from eggs benedict was handing him out to his favorites yeah!

Oh I'm sorry I didn't tell you to feel bad just keep an eye out ah all right I will be seeing you later I'll car okay good night the shot shifts to a wide and billy is talking to an actual parrot with a little hat on walking back and forth on a bucket anyway I do that yeah totally so yeah billy's just walking around being like hey just rumors to anybody that'll listen and putting rolls wherever he can hide them and that is going to create some sort of ticking time bomb tension scenario oh yeah billy's just set a fuse love it uh okay anything else that we want to know that was it yeah next couple days pass and you go back to maggie and she's like all right we're going to be a devil's grin by midday everything's ready to go yeah yeah you we've uh reinforced the starboard side of the boat anticipating the attack from the pirate smuggler ship.

I have planted the seed of distrust within the mutineers and there has been a huge increase in fights on the deck so I guess it's working. And then Tuck rolls out like a sheet of paper with like drawings and descriptions of people and is like these are all the people who are the mutineers too. Oh whoa y'all are great at this. What have you done? Uh Captain DeVessel does finger quotes. Watch yourself. Uh yeah no we've got people in place. I've got loyals amongst my crew. Caroline's out there.

Greg's out there. Others presumably. Bruno. Oh god Bruno. He's a real piece of work huh? He's been a handful. He has been. He's like too enthusiastic. He keeps coming back and being like hey boss you need anything else from me and then every once in a while he'll like try and jump me and I have to whoop him. He's really into fighting so he should either be a help or a massive hindrance but okay noon we're gonna pass the reef and then we're gonna do it. We're gonna do it. What is it?

Come on again maybe just remind me real quick what the maneuver the ship is doing is. Okay so according to Ving what he's told me of what he's done we are going to pass into the devil's grin. The ship pursuing us is going to follow. We're gonna slow down a little bit. Ving's gonna engage his mechanisms. Yeah. We'll be heading towards the devil's grin. They'll come up on our stern.

We will drop the mast and then I'll create a gust of wind and grab the rudder to the side and they'll be launched around us slingshotting them into the reef. All right. Wow. Does that sound like a plan? That sounds like such an amazing plan Ving. And just before that Billy I need you to kind of light the fuse on the tensions. No problem. Get the mutineers all you know confused. Yeah. Billy and I have a plan about that. We sure do. Fist bump. Yeah. All right. And the bird thing is safe? Hidden?

Oh yeah. I've checked on Perel a lot and him and the bird seem to be getting along pretty well. Oh that's good. Yeah. Okay. Uh Perel has a huge supply of nuts. I made sure I went into the stocks below deck and I took a whole bunch of bags up. Okay. Perfect. Cut to Perel's broom closet for a second. Like huge sacks of nuts. He's like sitting on top of them like fuck I have no room for my legs. Like basically at the roof of the closet. Awesome.

And she's like oh and also we went down and we checked what else they were smuggling. Oh the other box. Yeah. There's another box. Oh shit. It's a bunch of vials. Oh yeah. Full of some liquid that we've been too frightened to check. I can look thing. Yeah. Look let's look I have mystery liquids. Okay. Yeah. I've got one. I've got one here. I've got one here. She hands it to you. It's a vial of liquid. What color is it? It is gold gold. Okay. Yeah.

Whoa sick like gold like clear gold or like thick clear gold clear gold. Okay. Then give me a I guess a spelt Lord eight. Okay. So yeah Jessica tell me what this is. Fuck wait. Can you could you use things sage move? Is this those? Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. Okay. Yeah. Call me. Thank you because that's how things thing works is if you consult thing. We're just both looking at it. Okay, you get an extra plus two on Spout Lore if being helps you with it. Oh, hey thing. Can you help me?

I mean I can we can try should I taste it? You know what? I'll taste it. Okay. You know what? I'll smell it first. Oh it smells like sulfur. Okay. Let me try something thing takes dips his finger in it and it on the ground and it it hardens and begins expanding. It starts like like bubbling up from the ground. And hardening as it does. So and then there's like this weird little kind of like reverse dripping shape on the ground. Does it hardened into gold solid gold? Yeah, it's like a gold color.

Hmm. Maybe it's from doing like reproductions or um, oh, you know counterfeit. Yeah, I was gonna say it could this could be like Spout Lore versions of fool's gold. Mm-hmm. Yeah. Yeah, it's fool's gold. Oh, yeah. Uh, it's called forger's gold forger's gold. Yeah. And it's good for counterfeiting. Nice. Yeah, it bursts up like that and it looks really real but it's hollow inside. Oh cool. Yeah, sweet. So you if you know how to you can make a bunch of like hollow coins and shit. Yeah.

And for like when you open them up, it'll look like open a chest or somebody a bag. It'll be like whoo be sand in it if they need to weigh it down. Yeah. Cool. That's cool. It's just yeah. And Maggie's like, oh wow. Okay. It's pretty. Cool stuff. Yeah, I think takes a vial. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Okay. For legal purposes Maggie for legal purposes for research. Okay. All right. Fine. All right. And you know what? Once this is done, you guys can do whatever you want with it. Really cool.

We should become forger. No, no, no, no, no. Hold on. Well, actually I do a lot of that's actually not a terrible idea. We'll talk about it later. But right now we got a plan to enact right. Let's go. Let's do it. Cut. To the dinner hall where I I am getting bags of spaghetti so much spaghetti. I'm like I have it on like a stick like a bindle. Yeah, but like a ton of bags on this boat is making spaghetti chef. Yeah, there was a guy last episode that was elbow deep in a bucket of spaghetti.

That's oh my God. You're absolutely right there. What was I thinking? They brought cooked spaghetti in a barrel and I've enlisted Bruno has helped to help me hand out spaghetti to specific members of the mutineer. Yeah, totally. Yeah. And then saying that like with an earshot of another mutineer. Yeah, it's a gift from Benedict. Yeah. Yeah. Okay, cool. And tuck and Billy have worked out like a fuse that will blow the whole thing and it's Ted. Oh, yeah, that makes sense. Yeah, that makes sense.

Ted's been itching for a rematch. Yeah, so you keep your handing out the spaghetti with Bruno and Bruno's like, hey, secret spaghetti. He walks into another person goes secret spaghetti. Hey, Bruno. Remember you have to say it's from Benedict. Oh, yeah, but Benedict spaghetti. He's doing okay. So I go like I will go to like that person again. Second bag of spaghetti.

Just to clarify to clarify the this is compliments of ex Benedict and it's to compliment you for a job well done and he's saying, hey, I love you. You're my favorite. You have worked so hard employee of the month. Here you go. And then tuck is sitting at another table where Ted is sitting at and like he's pointing and he's like, what the fuck did those mutineers get way more spaghetti than us? I want spaghetti to Ted. Why don't you have any spaghetti? What do you mean spaghetti?

Look at all that spaghetti over there. I'll kill him. He grabs his knife and he starts running along the table. Is this too soon or is it okay? This is where I was about to say that like Caroline is walking down the steps from the top deck and she looks at you and she nods and then she looks and she sees Ted already running at somebody and goes, okay, goes back upstairs and Ted tackles a guy to the ground and it's just like I'll kill you spaghetti bastard and then he's like get off me Ted.

You fucking mutineer. He goes, I'm a mute. You're a mutineer and then the whole table that Ted was sitting at like rushes over to fight everyone that has spaghetti. Yeah, the ship lists and everybody like everybody that is not a main like, you know, eggs or Greg or whoever is like you're a mutineer. You're a mutineer and they're all just fighting each other. Yeah, and it's pandemonium. There's spaghetti everywhere. Somebody starts playing shaking a baby now shaking a baby. Yeah, the band yeah.

Yeah, so there's still people above decks that are working but below decks is fucking pandemonium. Yeah. So what do you guys do? I run up to the top deck Billy. Are you coming with? Yes. Sorry. I was eating the leftover spaghetti food fight is Billy's prime scenario. Yeah, it's just everywhere. Yeah.

And you guys run upstairs onto the top deck and yeah, it's just like tuck is like he's he's up to on the top deck and like not everyone's fighting quite yet and he's just like I run out of spaghetti because some fucks have been eating all of it. It's on the floor downstairs people like no the spaghetti they start running downstairs. Yeah, what about the kids are still garlic bread? We robbed that Olive Garden for nothing eggs. Benedict ate all the garlic bread Benedict you son of a bitch.

Yeah, and you see their plans kind of working the mutineers are just like they're doing their thing. Yeah, they stop it, but you definitely like tuck you see somebody that you know is not a mutineer get punched in the face by somebody going you got damn mutineer like nobody knows who is actually mutineering.

Yeah, it's a real smoke screen and then you are, you know, wandering about as people start to freak out and you see in the distance the devil's grin start to rise from the water huge jagged peaks of gray stone not unlike a sharp teeth in a furious maw rise from the waves creepy.

What do you do and behind us is a mutineer ship coming up quick blue period is arriving with a beautifully painted hall made to look like the midday sky and they've painted a little sun on their sale like they'll never see us. And yeah, they're coming up on you fast. What do you do? Well, I pull the levers. Let's do this. It's time. Okay.

Now you run up you engage all of your levers the sails drop you feel the anchor clink clink clink clink clink clink clink the helm the guy at the helm at the steering wheel that he hears is like it shudders and clicks and then pulls a rope that's underneath a board in the thing and pulls like just spins out knocks him in his teeth. Hell yeah, and you are now attempting your elemental mastery move. Yes, I am 2d6 plus wisdom. Here we go. Oh great. Oh man, no, it's a nine.

Oh yeah, but I would like to use luck of the fair folk to aid from any distance. Okay, so yeah, roll your 2d6 plus bond. Oh a 10. Yes. Okay, that 10 makes things 9 a 10, which means he gets to choose to elemental mastery. I will choose the effect you desire comes to pass and you retain control. You drop the sail you drop anchor the ship comes to a screeching halt.

Yeah, you got his feet on the on the port side and he's a full length with the ropes, you know, neither side and he's like pulling and as the ship like starts to jerk to a halt everybody on the deck just like jerks forward a bunch of people hit the deck. Yeah, tuck tumbles forward a bunch of people get buried under crates of spaghetti down below deck turns out there's so much more than people thought like wait a second.

I got why do I only brought spaghetti and as blue period comes up hard on your starboard side Ving calls upon the powers of the wind and their sails fill to bursting and their deck starts to shake as they rip past you at record speeds, which means that they are not quite prepared to loose a volley from their cannons. So they don't fully get the ship, but they still do let loose as they come up on the side.

So Ving you're holding onto the ship and you look and you feel the silence in the air just before the barrage and then boom boom boom boom boom boom what do you do? Well tuck takes he sees a few coming for him and he takes the axe and he starts baseballing them back. He can he do that prepares to try to baseball them back. Yes, okay. Oh, can I use TLC for the that's a that's like for the blood God, right? Yeah, I don't think that's quite no. Okay, how it would work.

I mean, I guess it could because it's destruction. I'm destroying the cannonballs. I you know what? It's pretty cool. Let's try it. So what's that you're initiated in the ways of sacrifice choose something that your gods value when you're you sacrifice those things as per your rights and rituals rule plus wisdom on a 10 plus the GM will grant you insight into your current trouble or a boon to help you. Okay on a seven and nine the sacrifice is not enough and then they take of your flesh.

Okay, okay, two to six plus wisdom eight. Okay roll your damage three. Okay. So yeah, tuck sees a cannonball coming straight for him and in slow motion brings TLC up and swings at it just as it comes as it fires right for his chest. Oh fuck and the blade connects and starts to deflect the ball and you feel the vibrations of taking this cannon shot reverberate up the handle of the axe into your fucking bones shit and you take three damage fuck without your armor. Oh without my armor. Shit.

Can I try something? Yeah, absolutely with the roommate. I don't know how many cannonballs are coming at us. It's just like a barrage. So you're basically trying to just not get hit by even like one. Oh yeah, I want to try switcheroo. Yeah, that fucking rules. What are you trying to switch it with the spaghetti? Yeah, I still have some bags on my meatball. Okay. Yeah do it plus charisma. So eight plus two is ten a ten plus it works a hundred percent.

Okay, so you see Billy also in slow motion because you're all just hyper vigilant right now. You see a cannonball rocketing through the air towards you and you just go. Yeah, it's just a bag of spaghetti hits me in the face and a cannonball is on my bindle. So I fall over dragged to the ground covered in spaghetti beautiful. It looks like the cannonball went through your head somebody behind you like oh my God because it's spaghetti.

Explodes it looks like his head like his brains just I can't find my fine. I find he's my crow is just like Billy Ving. What do you do? I'm going to use lies a feather trying to like okay dodge around them totally ten ten. Okay and you just like leap up and jump off of a cannonball. I did know I'm off like there's like the rigging and like yeah, yeah just dicks and stuff just like landing on a knuckle and bouncing off and just doing whatever I can to get fucking red.

Yeah, totally dancing between the cannonballs. Yeah, yeah and you hit the deck. The barrage has passed now. Thankfully, there's some shattered parts of the ship for sure. There's some damage but not as much as there would have been if they hadn't been hurled along by the winds and you see the ship try and turn they really do and it just shears like one side of the boat off. Oh shit.

And they just start to sink and you're like yeah, I did it just as the winds pick up and start firing you towards the rocks as well. Oh fuck. Oh no, and that's where we're going to end it for this week. I'm your game master shot O'Hara joining me as always playing to Coma Dome the Barbarian Abdul Aziz so long playing being the half-elf Druid Paul offers take care everyone and playing fat Billy the halfling thief Jessica tie by everybody.

Thank you to Aaron Reed for our intro and outro music the delight that it is every time and thank you to our patreon supporters who support us. At patreon.com slash Spout Lore or at spell or dot com slash money, please and in return receive hours upon hours of bonus content including bonus games monthly streams art merchandise a whole whack of shit. And if you want to find more about that and our other pursuits, you can follow us online at Spout Lore most places will catch you next time.

I'm scared and lost baby for times of resting revelry and though our journey may be like a conclusion we will not leave you without resolution return next week to hear some more whilst you commute or do your chores and for you I'd gladly Spout Lore

Spout Lore is made possible by contributions from our listeners if you would like to support us go to patreon.com Spout Lore where you can get extra bonus special content gather round friends let me tell you a tale of three heroes noble and bold a brute a druid and a thief who is but nine years old you know them by name you know them by deed their quests are famously daring so here I sit singing to you an adventure that is worth sharing tuck is the brute he knows not his home he loves to sing and fight fingers have health he shifts his shape and wields a spear with great might billy's a thief his tiny size does max the largest heart best and brightest they may not be but their friendship outweighs their smarts so gather round friends and listen you for the tales about to start hello there and welcome to Spout Lore I'm your game master Sean O'Hara and joining me as always playing tacoma dome the barbarian Abdul Aziz hello everybody playing ving the half-elf druid Paul Oppers hello there and playing fat billy the halfling thief jessica tie hello everyone when last we left our heroes they were being informed by perel last name unknown about uh the identity of the wizard reputed to live in the glacial tower that one of the two potential wizard boxes is being kept in we learned that it was the residence of a mysterious wizard named adernick all water whose area of specialty was unknown but she was known to be of great power and great influence as the leader of what the wizards called the gathering we then said goodbye to a number of library characters and we were able to get to the end of the episode and we're going to get to the end of the episode and we're going to get to the end of the episode louise the chef in the cafeteria we avoided saying goodbye to birdie the night shift chef in the cafeteria tuck and ving said goodbye to maresh elnor and learned that uh the capture of roth and the study of his connection to the spirit world by maresh and the medical wing of the margani library had yielded information that the spirit world and the material are perhaps a bit more intermingled than many specialists at the time of the episode so we're going to get to the first believed so we now know that there's a little bit of the material in the spirit and a little bit of the spirit in the material whatever that might mean we then prepared for a going away party grec owner of the bar that tuck used to work in in mccall brought blood feet for musical entertainments uh we saw zane and uma shusha talked to zane troubled young man and current vessel of the icon of wrath uh ving and shia yeah had a little moment yeah said goodbye said they wish they had more time together uh to kind of really get into the brother-sister relationship well maybe someday they will maybe someday they will they did learn that they both had been told an identical children's rhyme lullaby uh called the arrow's path that potentially very very likely has a connection to their father because the very first line starts with the ranger king so it's probably him and honestly he probably is the ranger king wrote it about himself yeah so who knows what uh mysteries are contained within those lines uh oh ving snapped his unbreakable spear oh yeah in half and gave one half to shia yeah yeah that spear is really not unbreakable it has been broken more times than not honestly at this point and we finish things off with tuck approaching ama margani after learning that um zane vessel for the icon of wrath zane vessel for the icon of wrath is able to draw upon his icon's powers while retaining his own personhood and uh agency so tuck approached ama and asked him to look once more into the truth of tuck and ama once more saw nothing then in a desperate gamble to try and understand what tuck's deal is ama attempted to look forward to the truth of tuck's future and delivered the prophecy it will end for you beneath a burning tree and the last thing you say will be a lie and that is where we find ourselves now fireworks arc through the skies above people are hooting and hollering as the fireworks are led off into the sky you can see uh pops and bursts of light in the direction of the city of mccall and people are starting to uh take part in the secondary purpose of the fireworks festival as they begin to fire fireworks at one another oh shit just a couple people here in the city of mccall people here and there.

The library is pretty good, but there's a lot of academic rivals in the library. Just shooting Roman candles at each other. Yeah, so you just hear like Virgil, you fuck! It gets really smoky when you shoot Roman candles back and forth, so it's like starting to get pretty smoky. Oh yeah, Billy's laying low to the ground. Trying to scuttle away. And Tuck lost Amma because he was going to be like, what the fuck does that mean? But like, it got smoky so fast. Well, Tuck got hit in the face a lot.

I think a lot of people don't like Tuck, actually. He's a huge target. Yeah, so that's what's going on. The fireworks festival has well and truly begun. I seek shelter under the party sub table. Safe here. He says as he grabs another. Yeah, just pull us up down. I said that's still connected to the top. Like an elephant. If anyone was looking, they would see that all subs lead to Billy and Billy. Your solitude is broken as a burst of sand heralds the arrival of Perel.

Hey, man, they almost got me there. Yeah. A couple of people have a real problem with me. It would seem. Oh, I wonder why. Why? Oh, I don't know. Hey, Tuck, what are you doing down here? God, I got hit in the face like seven times.

Where's being we could maybe things in the square with like a Roman candle sticking out of every like Wolverine and he's flipping them around just like when he was a bartender like he was doing like cocktails and dreams moves with them and he's he's getting hit everywhere, but he's just laughing and shooting him because he can't be hurt by flame. That's true. His hair is a little bit on fire. His clothes are on fire. Yeah, the fire won't even touch your skin. Yeah.

I guess Perel's just like, should we just hang out under here? Should wait for this to die down. Yeah. Does anyone have any scores they want to settle? Did I hate anyone? Billy says. Yeah. Actually, Perel goes, no, I don't. Actually, and he crawls out of the table and he comes back with a Roman candle in his hand and he tucks it into his robe and goes, I'm gonna hold on to that for later. Wait, why? I have plans for it. What? You can only do it now, though.

Oh, I'm not McCallin, so I can do it whenever I want. Actually, I like that. He's like, I'll be saving this for later stuff in his shirt, and it's like, it's a little wick. It just goes off under his chin. You see it go slowly burning as it goes under his shirt. Is the universe being like, no, I know who you hate the most. It's you. And we can just honestly, we can just cut forward unless Tuck has somebody he wants to go deal with. We sent an invitation to Fadum. Did he show up?

Oh, did Fadum show up? I don't think so. Okay, fair enough. Oh, man. I think that Fadum is out there somewhere beneath the pale moonlight. Tuck and Fadum looking at the moon singing that song. There's a world beneath the pale moonlight. And then it's just Tuck and Fadum whacking each other in the nuts every once in a while. It's my, I'm singing. Shut up. Shut the fuck up. I have the deeper register. Yeah, and you're gonna have the higher register if you don't shut the fuck up right now.

Sick bird. Like we can, we already, we talked about it earlier. We could just jump forward to. Yeah, I don't have any scores I need to settle. We cut to next morning. Did everyone sleep above ground in Elaine Springs or did you go back downstairs? Um, I did sleep under the party sub table, but I'm in the library now. Yeah, I also slept under the party sub table. Okay. And you're still there? Yeah. Uh, and we cut forward a little bit more and you guys are, I guess, packing up your room.

Yeah, I already, um, packed up and I'm clinging to Farrah's leg. Like, I don't want to be here because it's so hot, but I also don't want to go. You are such a nice grandma and I don't want to go on the road. I don't want to go in the sea again. Billy, it's okay. She, like, kneels down and tries to get you off her leg, but she, like, holds you. It's alright.

It was, and I can say this, one of the greatest pleasures of my life to meet you and the lessons that the three of you have imparted on me, in me, and around me will be of great importance to me for my remaining days. May they be long and endless because, as I said, I am already quite old and I plan on getting much older. Okay, that's good. Um, if you hear from Erk, uh, just, like, send a little moth or whatever it is that you guys use. I will.

Um, I wish that I could have tied this up neater for you, but he hasn't. We haven't been able to retrieve the text yet. That's okay. I'll know if it doesn't work out, I guess. And then I let go and I, like, kick a pebble. Billy. It's fine. No, the pursuit- No, it's fine. No, Billy, the pursuit of knowledge is a long and arduous road, but the destination is always worth the journey. Whatever. Okay. That does sound like a nerd. I don't really know what else to say.

I just want you to know that I'm going to miss you. I'll miss you, too. Bye! Billy is embarrassed and runs away. Yeah, she doesn't call after you. She lets you be embarrassed. Yeah, she lets you sit in your feelings. Thank you for being so good to us. You didn't have to do that. We kind of forced you to be good to us. You did, in a way. I recall you smashing into the library via secret entrance the first time you came here. Yeah. What good memories those were. Oh, man. That was so us.

I look forward to hearing of your exploits. The ability to travel and see the things that the three of you, four of you, she nods at Perel, who nods back and goes, hey, that the four of you have seen and will see is incredible. Gift. And sharing it with me and thus with the world is an incredible kindness. I wish that there was a way that we could easier correspond, but I understand your location will be up in the air. So perhaps this may help in an emergency situation.

And she, like, pokes a bookshelf and beep boop beep boop beep boop beep boop boop. A little bookworm crawls onto her finger. Okay. She says, um, she will find her way back to me regardless, so if you have a message, unfortunately, a single message, then she will bring it to me. Oh, super important. Beep boop beep boop beep boop beep boop. And she transfers from Farah's finger to Tuck's finger. And Tuck's like, one message. What would it be? Bing, make sure that he doesn't use it right away.

I mean, I'll do my best. I'm fucking responsible, okay, guys? I've grown a lot since the beginning of this show, okay? I won't, but burn this immediately, okay? Actually, you know what? Beep boop beep boop beep boop. Take two. Yeah, you give it to me. Tee-doo, tee-doo, onto Bing's finger. Hey, buddy, what's your name? Bing asks the worm. Uh, goes, Mahmood. Hey, Mahmood. And he has markings around his eyes that look like little glasses. Cute. That's the only thing that distinguishes him.

And she shakes your hands. I shake Farrah's hand. I'll miss you. Bing shakes both of their hands, shaking. I'll miss you as well. Thank you. Maybe someday people will write about what happens next, and you'll find out when it comes to your library after being published and then distributed and then making its way through the history of knowledge through books. And then back to you, the keeper of knowledge of books and nerdy things like this.

Don't let this go to your heads, but some people already are writing about you. What? Who? I can't share others' work before it's finished. Fuck, what are they writing? Your histories. Okay, well, let them know that I am in a book phase, but I will be in a cut phase eventually. So if they have any, like, you know, like, drawings they need to do, get in touch whenever that happens, I guess. Let them know a few months in advance. Yeah, and I will dehydrate like crazy for whatever the…

Thing that we're, like, the painting. I don't know how people paint things in our world. I just know that pictures exist, so whatever process to make pictures happen. She shakes her head and says, Tuck, don't dehydrate, please. That's not… It seems like a good idea because you see it in the plays and in the moving pictures, but it's a terrible idea for both health reasons and other… Reasons. Anyways, good luck on your journeys. I hope to hear from you soon.

Hey, maybe this can help you or at least add it to your collection. I have a book about magical storms. It was in the offices of a wizard. Oh, it was from Aquarius. Study from a gajillion years ago. Actually, we might need that. We're going to a magical storm. Actually, probably is a good idea. I'll hang on to that. Okay. It looks cool, huh? It does. It has pop-ups. Oh, don't show me that. Just take it away. And then Tuck's like, I do have this first edition Love and Lust.

It's a choose-your-own-adventure, although you know, we might need that. Yeah, we might want to show it. You can keep that one, actually. That's for jerk-off purposes. And Perel leans forward and says, I have nothing to add, but thank you for taking me in and keeping me safe. And she nods and goes, we would have it no other way. Good luck on your journeys. Bye. Thank you. Goodbye. And she goes into her office and closes the door. Should we go say bye to Black Spire? Yeah.

You find Billy clinging to Black Spire's leg. We go down into the mine. You're already there. It's okay, bro. It's okay. I'll see you guys sometime. Make sure you write lots of letters that Tuck and Ving can read to me. There is no step of that that I am capable of. No worries. How about you write a letter in your head and then I write a letter in my head and then we pretend like we send them and respond that way. Yeah, I could do that. That's actually a very sweet way.

I think about missing someone. Yeah, so I will definitely do that and you're going to be cool like you're look. I'm going to live forever and so are all of you. So we will see each other soon. I hope so. Yeah, and Tuck in his head remembers that he just received a prophecy that he was going to die. He's like, yeah, man. Yeah, we all will live forever. Certainly fairy elf elf. Whatever I am orphan. Yeah, so I'll be good. I got crunch here and look I've been getting I've been making gains.

Look at me. Yeah, you're so big and strong and you actually do notice he is he's bigger. He's noticeably larger. What? Yeah, getting bigger. I've been fucking chowing on the crunch. Look at the size of this place, man. I got room to grow. Holy shit. So proud of you Black Spire. Hey, I'm proud of you. I am not in touch with my emotions for trauma reasons, but I just want to say thank you for showing me the world and thanks for being who you are. Whoa.

Yeah, it's been a long day thing and thanks for showing us the world that you see what? No, I get it man. I get it being is taking this many attempts at the goodbye actually and thanks for thanks for helping out with our our thanks for helping out with our Billy's doing like the stretch it out motion to being like keep going man. I hate I hate long goodbyes. Thanks for being such a good pal to our friends. Yeah, thanks for being a good boy. Oh, yeah. Mama. Uh-huh.

He's got some some big bright crunch for you tight. Yeah, Fran. He's got some for you to say. Yeah, I love those old dudes. Yeah, you're gonna love hanging out with them. Cool. And thanks for giving me one of your scales and tuck. You actually noticed there is an obsidian coin in the middle of his forehead. Oh, hey, anytime. I think they grow back. Yeah, he shrugs who knows.

Hey, also, I don't know if this is going to help and he whips his tail a couple times and then smacks it against a rock and he reaches back with his little claw and like shoves forward a long shard of obsidian. Whoa, holy shit. He's like that will cut anything once what yeah, things slowly careful. You're gonna want to pick it up with like a with an iron. Oh, yeah, I know that should be fine. Plank. Thank you. You put that on your spear as well. I was thinking pal. You do need to use.

Okay, you're gonna hear some big words from me. Okay. Okay, it will need to be wielded with intention, but it will cut anything. So you have to want to cut it. Yeah, like if you pick it up, it's not going to slice your fucking fingers off. Okay, but like if you got to like he does like a bunch of stabbing, you know like that. Oh, but only one time not three times. No, it's the biggest word I've ever heard three grunts. That was a fun ride. Thank you.

Cause I'm holding onto his arms the whole time. Yeah, so I don't know. I heard you say put it on your spear. Yeah, I'd save it. Oh, okay. Well, I'll make sure it gets used when it needs to. Yeah. Thank you. Hey, anytime you're my bros. Come here. Bring it in. I go and I hug him around the neck. Yeah. And he wraps you in his big giant forearms and he gets it gets tighter. I'm gonna miss you bro so much. I'm gonna miss you guys so much. You're a good boy. You're a good boy. Okay.

Catch you on the flip side, bros. And he does a back. He tries to do a back flip. He jumps up and back and lands on his back and then rolls over his wings, scrabbling under and he flips over onto his front and he runs off into the cave. Yeah. He jumps off a cliff and you hear him go Black Spire. Oh, fuck. I'm fine. I'm fine. I landed it. I landed it. I landed it. And you hear Black Spire gallop off into the darkness. I guess that's it then. I know this is hard. He meant a lot to you.

Me and Black Spire got you this. I don't know if you noticed in the middle of his forehead, your obsidian coin. What? Yeah. What? Here, him and I got you this and Ving hands Tuck an obsidian guitar pick. Oh, whoa. Holy shit. Wait, what was in the middle of his forehead? I traded him the obsidian coin for one of his scales. This has been imbued with the mark of the eyes of the tiger. Oh. So that if you ever want, you can see through the coin. Holy shit. Seriously?

If you ever want to visit your spirit animal, you can. So wait, what do I, explain more. How does this work? Ving has removed his eye of the tiger mark from Ama and imbued it into the pick so you can see through the eye of Black Spire. Oh no fucking way. Don't know if it's gonna work or if it'll be a comfort to you in a time of great darkness or loneliness. Who knows? But when you need it, he'll be a friend for you. So he has the obsidian coin with him? Yeah. Oh shit. That's fucking rad. Man.

It's a really weird way of bringing it up. Yeah. I don't know if I'd play guitar with that I'd probably cut through the stream. But you know what? Shred, bro. Yeah, man. Fucking sick. Billy has like the secret smile on his face. He's like, finally the secret is revealed. Did you guys record a thing while I was gone? Yeah. Of us like talking about it. Okay. Okay. Yeah. Cool. Fucking sick. So now you have a spirit animal with a jewel in his forehead like Ving does. Yeah.

He's got the coin in his forehead. Yeah. Fucking rad. So he has a little third eye obsidian coin. I wonder what it'll imbue to him. Yeah. Can he talk to me? Can he see through my eyes? Who knows? Can I try it now? Yeah. It's a hard process for Tuck because he doesn't quite understand how the theory and the practices. So it's hard to connect. You don't really feel it right now. I put it on my forehead. It's cold. I think he's cold. We should go back. No, he's cold blooded. It's okay. It's okay.

It's fine. And then Tuck puts it in his leather wrist strap like an asshole in a college quad. Oh, yeah. So sick. So you guys just head back to the motor pool to meet Maggie. Yeah. Get out of here. And Maggie is there. She's got her stuff such as it is packed up on the retrofitted boat that you guys wrote in on. Yeah. You see, the Balco slouched on the couch, beet red and panting. What? And Maggie's like, all right, we ready to go. What the fuck happened to Balco? Oh, you know how it is.

Hop in, everybody. No, no. Balco, what happened? Billy? He's fine. What happened to him? She gives you all a look. Come on. Fist pump speed master. She fist bumps thing. Do I really need to talk about it? Did you guys fuck? Let's just go. All right. S&M and S&M. I don't know how it is with the three of you, four of you per rail. I'm sorry. I keep forgetting you're there. That's fine. Everybody does. His mouth has been full of granola this whole time is why he hasn't been talking.

He's been eating leftover party sub from the night before. Yeah, we don't. Let's just get out of here and you load up into the sand boat. Do you guys really want to belabor this point? Okay, they fucked a fucking visual gag. Okay, that's so funny that you guys are like, no, don't be vague with me. Don't try and play coy details and you load up your shit and head out. Yeah, and we cut forward to the city of Wickport. So did they fuck on the couch right before we walked in?

I think as we were walking in. Why was he so red right away? I'm not red after sex. I mean, Balco is red most of the time, so he's maybe just a little extra red. So they fucked right before we walked into the motorhome. No, he's a big dude. He doesn't have great cardio. It could have been half an hour before. Shun didn't say, his face was red. It's a good point. You are at the harbor of Wickport standing before the clear water.

People have very frustrated looks on their faces as the stevedores that only days ago finished unloading the boat are now loading it back up and they keep seeing that they pass the three of you and they like spit on the boards. Dude, come on. It's a union job. I wouldn't be doing this if it wasn't for the pennies and he walks up. The boat. Isn't that what you wanted? Do you want to find us? We just made your jobs easier.

The guy stops at the top and looks back down and he goes, pennies, and he keeps walking onto the boat. It's weird that he's working for Eggs Benedict. I mean, I guess I would work for Eggs Benedict. It's just we never ask for them. We'll work for brunch for five Eggs Benedict a day plus expenses. So Greg comes down the gangplank with another kind of older, shrimpy looking old man with like glass. On his nose and long gray hair in a ponytail.

He's like everybody just, you know, we're just getting loaded up, but I just wanted to introduce you to the bosun Eggs Benedict. He's going to be sort of in charge of the deck crew. So you might want to get familiar. What's a bosun? He's going to be in charge of the deck crew. So you might want to get familiar. What's a deck crew? Yeah, a crew. I don't want to have to explain all the parts of a boat and the life upon the boat.

So a bosun is a person who is in charge of the deck crew and the general maintenance of the ship. What is deck crew do? They crew the deck. Yeah. What's a stevedore again? Stevedore is a person that loads and unloads a ship. Huh? You guys have been on boats before, right? Yeah. How'd you get here? We got we got on a little boat and you just didn't on little boat. I got a little one and then the patron of sailors just dropped us off here.

You know, you can be on a boat without naming things a bunch of stupid names, right? Yeah. And when you say the patron of sailors got us here, eggs like leans around Greg is like, what did you say? Chimes, you know chimes, like guy with like kind of like bald, lots of tattoos like long beard with like rings in it used to be married to the moon. Yeah. Sales a little boat with a bunch of runes on it. He calls it the calm. Yeah. Sales like the sea of graves for all of eternity. Yeah.

Pretty magical guy. He gave us this knife pulls out the waning knife that he stole from Billy the night before. Hey, we've been stealing it back and forth. It's kind of like a fucking elf on the shelf game. It's like, where's the waning knife today? Old tattoos, long beard, gray hair. Yeah. Yeah. I can't, you know, doesn't doesn't ring a bell as eight people matching that description walk past him onto the ship chimes.

Oh, no, that's not just you described basically ninety percent of the sailors that I've ever worked with. So anyways, yeah, eggs Benedict pleased to be at your service. Don't get in my way. Okay, where's our bedroom? Oh my God and he just walks up onto the ship and Greg is like just don't he's he's he's a courier sailor. He's a real ornery folk kind of kind of folk. But yeah, you got you guys got hammocks. It's all good. Okay, cool. Come on.

Let's get you settled and he takes you up top and then down below with all your stuff and you are struck by the size of the clear water. Like you have only been in this thing when it was a shattered piece of shit that was half buried in the mud, right? But this is like a big-ass boat multiple decks dozens of crew shit piled everywhere because there's no wasted space on a boat. Yeah, some people would say it's big enough to fit a small elephant or hippopotamus made out of rocks.

A couple big dogs or very small dragon and you're looking around and you're like, yeah where I can't see any space that would be able to fit a 15,000 pound dragon that was only getting larger by the day. But you do see some people do have pets on the ship like somebody somebody has like a bird and there's like a dog, you know, just like sea pets and Greg takes you down to the where that looks like. The crew sleeps and he kind of gestures to an area around him.

Okay, and he's like, yeah, you can sling your hammocks here sometime between or I want to say you're not really crew. So you're going to get the worst sleeping slots. It's probably going to be like, I don't know between 4 and 10 p.m. I'd like to nominate that we sleep whenever we want to agreed agreed seconded. Yeah majority votes. Yeah three to one. Yeah.

Yeah, you guys are going to love life on a ship motion past and he takes you to Maggie's cabin the captain's quarters as she is settling in with her shit. She's unpacking her bags and she's like, ah, yeah. Hi, what do you think of the ship been a while since you've been on here? Huh? Was a no small undertaking to get this thing floating again. It's pretty good. Yeah. All right. So we got a crew of pretty decent sailors a lot of career folk.

We picked up in the principalities in between but you three are pretty exceptional in each of your own ways. So Billy you got those you got those peepers my eyes. Yeah, you got a good way of seeing a good distance. Uh-huh. All right, you're going to be up in the crow's nest. They're going to be keeping an eye out with the crows with their crow is up there. Yeah, and you're going to be helping him keep an eye on things. Okay thing. Yes, you've got control over a certain elemental abilities.

Control is a very loose word in my mind. You're going to be what I call wind boy. Bing looks off into the distance and a little bit of breeze races his wild gray hair and he goes wind boy. I like the sounds of that and tuck. Hey you carry whatever anyone tells you to carry. Oh sick. I'm so good at that sucks. I have to sit up with the crows while you guys do fun things Billy. Do you not want to you don't have I'm not going to make you your little kid. I'm not going to make you do stuff.

I can trade you if you want to carry everything it's fine. I'll just I'll sit with the birds and I've just now decided that the perilous journey role will still be the perilous journey role, but it will be to determine how much trouble you three make during this journey and how it affects the jobs of those around you sweet. Okay, so first leg of the journey which is going to be from Wickport to to an island like a group of islands further that to the north where it starts getting cold.

Okay, I go yeah, an archipelago an Arctic archipelago and then from there. We'll kind of see what happens because maybe this this will be the whole episode. So who can say so perilous journey it's all plus wisdom and what is our individual roles carrying wind, boy, crows, and okay, so it's not the same roles as you know, because they have a quartermaster, you know, it's just kind of like do you guys fuck somebody else up enough? Okay, we get into trouble. Do I see something really dangerous?

Exactly plus wisdom. I got twelve three nice plus was my got eleven. Okay, so wind boy doing a great job great. Basically the trailblazer, you know helping carry the ship along. Billy the Scout did a great job and tuck fucked up somehow so Billy will be able to spot any sort of danger before it arrives.

So you see, you know, you head out from Wickport early in the day as the sun rises you sail for a good few hours like half a day and Billy you see ships here and they're passing by of all make and model. Yeah, the climb up to the bird's nest zone was harrowing to say the least. Um, they eventually had to wrap a rope around Billy and call him up. Yeah, and he was like staying here the whole time not leaving now and you get to the top and there is a man up there who is skin and bones.

He's so skinny and he's got ragged shorts on Oh, no, like a tank top and he's got huge glasses that magnify his eyes so big in his head. Cool. He's just like, hey, kid. Are you okay? Oh, yeah, I'm better than I've ever been. I'm Crow. Nice to meet you. Nice to meet you, too. I'm Fat Billy. Oh, your name's Fat? Actually, you know what? You fit right in on a ship crew. Everybody's got fucked up names. Thank you. I'm good. They call me Crow for God's sake. What's your real name? My name's Bernard.

Oh, Bernard. I kind of like that name better. Don't let anybody hear you call me Bernard. Okay. Do you want a snack? Yes. What do you got? I have, okay, I have a lot to choose from. I have dried fruit, mostly persimmons and waffles, and I have dried wapple nuts and something, I don't know what kind of nuts these are, but they're really long. And then I also have jerky and I have a baggie of gumbo. Gosh, that winded. I have protein drinks and protein powder and protein candy. I have cubes.

I have a bag of moss. You can have it. I don't want it. As you're looking through your bag, talking about all the foods that you have, a drip of saliva hits the wood in front of you. And he's like, kid, you're going to have to be very careful with that food. They're extremely strict about when people eat on a boat, but I would love some of your wapple nuts right now. Do they starve him? No, they don't starve anybody. It's just if you run out of food on a ship, then things get really bad.

Okay, well, you can have it all. Oh, thank you. Yeah, I'm really concerned about how skinny he is. Oh, no, this is just a genetic thing. And he starts shoving wapple nuts in his mouth. I'll keep first watch. And yeah, a couple hours pass and you see some ships here and there passing by. Nothing out of the ordinary, it would seem. You see like a spray of water off in the distance. And just as you swing your binoculars, a tail flips beneath the water. Is that a dragon? Was it Siri? Oh, my gosh.

How big was it? Big. It was big? It was really big. Pretty big. Didn't get a good look at what the tail actually looked like. No. Just movement and water. But you do notice that one ship seems to be following you. At a distance, but following you. Discern realities. Plus wisdom. Seven. Okay, so you get one question off the list. I would like to know, What is the most dangerous thing in the world? What is the most dangerous thing in the world? What is the most dangerous thing in the world?

What is about to happen? What is about to happen is a general period of time. Not within the next few seconds, just because of how ships work. But this ship is going to try and get as close to you as possible until you are in what they hope to be a vulnerable position. And then they're going to attack and board you. Oh, shit. Hey, Bernard. Yeah. Look over there. And he grabs his, he picks up a little tiny spyglass. And it unfolds to be like, a meter and a half long.

I have to move out of the way for that. And he clings it against his already huge glasses and goes, Oh, yeah. Pirates. Is there an alarm to sound? Oh, we don't got to worry about them. Not right now. Okay. They're pretty far away. Old Clearwater, she's got some surprises in her. So, yeah, just keep an eye out. Okay. I keep watching them, I guess. Yeah. They're just, it's just good to know that they're out there, but it's not like we're going to get you. What does their ship look like?

It looks pretty nondescript, nondescript to the point of being suspicious. Like there's no flag. It doesn't fly a flag. Yeah. They painted the hull the color of the sky behind it. Yeah. It's just a very beautiful area, like blues and whites. A fog bank rolls in behind them. And you see these, this guy in the deck yelling and screaming. And all these guys like, oh, and they go over the sides, start painting the side of the boat. It must be wasting a fortune on paint.

And if you look really, really close, you can just make out the name along the side says Blue Period. And you know what? They probably would have been okay catching you if it wasn't for Windboy Ving, who does a great job of calling up just a nice, healthy breeze. Yeah. Yep. So. So you are what? Just, I guess you're just standing on the deck doing your thing. Yeah, totally. Just, he's got ropes in his hands. Maybe they don't go anywhere just to make him feel important.

And he's up on the front, king of the world. Nice. On the bow. And just having the effect I desire come to pass. Mm-hmm. Yeah. And the breeze keeps up for a good long while and you're able to push the ship along a little bit faster than it would have been able to go anyways. Mm-hmm. So, maybe a probably four or five day journey to this town is gonna be like three and a half. Wow. And there's so many sailors gathered on the deck behind you not doing their jobs that are just like, wow. So cool.

What does Ving look like while he does this? He's like out on the bow, right? He's out on the bow. Yeah. Like standing on the, yeah. Strip to the waist. Oh, wow. Yeah. Yeah, with really billowy blue linen, like three quarter pants. Where'd these come from? He ripped down the mizzen. He ripped down the mizzen. And he's made built pants out of them. His hair is blowing full forward like a windsock. Whoa. And he's following the direction of his hair. So cool.

And when there's a bunch of people looking and just like gawking at him, he like calls up a big gust and blows all their hats off and says like, you know, get back to work, you scallywags. Leave the blow job to me. And they're not even mad. They're like, wow, what a man. Ha. That might be. Dot, dot, dot. And tuck, you've been holding the same box for two hours and no one's told you where to put it. Sweating, quivering. Actually, it's not that bad. I've kind of just been holding this box. Yeah.

A guy told me to pick it up two and a half hours ago. And I haven't put it down. Really? I'm really, really bored. But other than that, I'm just holding this box. Yeah. You kind of have actually, you know what? It's a lot of scrabbling coming from inside of it. Yeah, totally. It's a lot of scrabbling. He keeps it every time someone passes him. He's just like this box is scrabbling a lot. And nobody responds. I feel like someone should take this more seriously. It's making a lot of noise.

Can someone please pay attention to me? Does anyone see the guy who looks like he wants this box to be anywhere? And you just kind of have time. You just have this box there. It's making noises. You notice there are a couple holes in it. I tried to look in there and like a talon came out one time. Oh, I wonder what's in here then. So yeah, Tuck, no one's telling you what to do with this box, man. I need an adult. And after a long time of saying, I need an adult. I need an adult. Over and over.

Eggs Benedict comes up to you and is like, come, come here. Come here. What? What are you doing standing around for someone told me to pick up this box and it's getting mad at me now. Why? You thought you got just hold the box on the deck. You thought that's what we do with boxes here on the ship. I've been asking people what to do for so long. I don't know anything. And he puts his finger to his lips. Be quiet. Okay, come with me. Okay. And he takes you down the steps down below decks. What?

Down below decks. Okay. Down below decks. Are you going to beat me? No, just be quiet. What? You're so paranoid. I mean, I've never been on a ship before. I don't know. Is there an initiation? Well, I mean, actually, yeah, when you cross the equator for the first time there is, but we're not going to do that. Okay. Well, actually, no, we're not going to do that. We're about the equator. Okay. Come with me. Okay. And he takes you down to where the cargo is.

And then you go past where the cargo is to like a weird kind of out of the way closet almost. With like a door with a heavy lock on it. Whoa. And he opens up, he grabs a key off his belt, but not off the ring that has all of the other keys on it. He grabs a different key and he unlocks the lock and he opens it and there's one other box in there, but not a lot of other stuff. Weird that there's unused space basically. And he's like, put it in there. Okay, man. Why are you so mad at me?

Just put the box in there. Fuck you, dude. And I put it in. Okay, get out of here. Go on. Okay. Go on. What are you being so rude about? And he closes the door and he locks it. What the fuck is going on with you? Get above deck. It's about horror. Oh yeah. I wanted to discern realities. Or discern reality. Figure out why the fuck this guy's being so rude. Okay. 2d6 plus wisdom. Eight. So you get one question. What here is not what it appears to be. Smart.

You notice that as you go back above, are you going to stay here? No, I think this is as you're leaving. Yeah. You walk back up and you're walking through the cargo hold and you see all the boxes they have loaded up are all stamped specific sigil and you realize the one that you carry down there was not stamped at all.

Oh, and neither was the other one in the in that little zone smugglers Texas out loud and just behind tuck almost out of frame a pair of eyes pop up as he says smugglers and goes back to. Yeah. So take of that what you will. Okay. There's some sort of unmarked cargo being moved around. Okay. A mystery is a foot. This also Texas is so loud. Talk is going to get fucking stabbed. Well, I suppose it's up to the greatest detective on earth.

Then he pulls out a like a little cowboy hat and he puts it on and he's like Dirk Adventure Boy and you head back above decks and you see. Perel lounging at the back of the ship with like three paneled mirror thing pretty much smoked glass lenses over his eyes just showing fucking kidding me. Hey buddy, why do you not have a job turns out if you don't say anything nobody doesn't think so. I just didn't ask any questions. All you guys asked Maggie. Hey, what can we do?

What can we do and I just shut up. Wow. Oh shit. I'm a genius. I've been hard for you being shut up. I can't hear you. Yeah, it's too windy. So yeah, how you like in sale life? I mean, it's pretty boring so far, but there's definitely they're smuggling something on deck. What? Yeah, man. There's like two on Mark boxes downstairs and one of them had a very angry thing inside of it was trying to get out. Perel folds up his reflector thing that he was using to tan his face.

His sunglasses off and goes. This sounds like a mystery for dirt adventure. Boy, I said it already man. That's what the hat is. Okay, fine. You can be card. I'll be cardamom the smartest horse in the world in the world. I already said it. That's right. Oh man, does that mean I got to be Judy? No, Judy's pretty cool. Who's Judy? She was in the shoes in the third book. There's more than one of these. Yeah, testament of night. Yes, she's a falcon. Yeah, Judy, Judy, the falconer.

She was a lady who becomes a falcon. Yeah, I'll be Judy. The falconer sick. Have you only read the first book? Bringers of the black flame. I've only read the first one. There's more than one. Yeah, it's a series. Dumb dumb. Why do you think it said number one on it? I thought it was the best book in the world. It's one in a series. I have them all with me. Oh shit. Yeah, give me those other books. Yeah. Okay, cool. You can have the second one if you want. Yeah, it's just down in my in my cabin.

Okay, I have a cabin. Are you fucking kidding me? Your personal cabin? How did that happen? Come with me and he takes you to a broom closet. Oh, yeah, it's like nobody looks in here. Okay, that makes him make it attached to the ceiling in the floor. He playing is leaving. He just hangs there like a zucchini any he grabs his bag and he pulls out a book with you know. I have Dirk adventureman on the cover riding cardamom off a cliff. Holy shit. It's the best you made your own cover.

Yeah, they all the other ones were ripped off. I got these in used bookstores and this one is called Dirk adventureman measure of doom the end the fissure of doom. So cool. Yeah. So this one is pretty cool because there's a fissure of doom in it. Oh, yeah. So don't dog. You're it or anything like that. Don't bend the spine because I made it. Okay, and then just puts in his little backpack sick. Thanks man. Yeah, no problem.

Don't tell anybody I'm in here and then he closes the door and Billy we cut back up top. Yeah, I stopped watching the pirate ship because it were really going fast. Yeah, and I'm looking around elsewhere now. You just trying to kind of see what's going on around you. Well, there's like not much except the coastline. So I've been I've just been spying on the on the deck. Interesting. Is this a roller? Sure. Yeah, give me a discern realities. Yeah. With wisdom. Yes. 10. Oh, 10. All right.

Three questions. Okay, who's really in control here? Because those fucking smugglers. Yeah. So the secrets. So you see you see Maggie and Greg and Caroline like walking around. And from what you gathered, this is like a mender vessel like Maggie is supposed to be the captain, but a lot of the crew seems to defer to eggs Benedict and it kind of makes sense because he's the boson like it makes sense. They'd be like, oh yeah eggs.

He's the guy, but there's a way both like what the fuck does that word mean? Okay, do you want me to tell you what a boson is? Just tell me what a boson is. I like to spell lower on the word boson. A boson is a petty officer on a merchant ship having charge of hall maintenance and related work. A naval warrant officer in charge of the hall and all related equipment. I might have been thinking of a different word and you know why? Because my dad was a boson. That's why I said boson.

I was thinking of a warrant officer. Oh, yeah, I got that. Yeah, I definitely got the word wrong, but now I'm wondering if it's more interesting that the boson is the one that seems to be pulling the strings. Pretty cool. Yeah, and you've already said boson a bunch. Yeah, so you realize that Greg definitely got it wrong because the boson from what Crow has told you is in charge of like the maintenance of the ship.

But Greg must have thought that he was in charge of the crew because a lot of them defer to Eggs Benedict. Oh. And you see a number of the crew members, not all of them, but a core number seem to be really chummy. And there's a lot of like whispering and like going and talking off to the side. Hey, Bernard. Yeah. Do you know much of those people? Who? Oh, Eggs and all those? Uh-huh. Yeah, no, I don't know too many. You know, I spend most of my time up here. I guess so.

Yeah, with all of my things. And he's like jangling all these like keepsakes that he brings up here with him. A lot of stuff in jars. I do. It's people just leave shiny things around and I grab them and I bring them up here. You know, I bet you and my friend Ving would really get along. Oh, is that Ving down there? Yeah, he has a lot of jars with stuff in them. Oh, he's a good guy. Yeah, he's a good guy. Yeah, he's a good guy. Yeah, he's a good guy. Yeah, he's a good guy.

Oh, he's quite a specimen, that one. Just a real sailor sailor. Yeah, totally. Anyway, okay, my second question is what here is not what it appears to be? Okay, so the people that Eggs seems to be connecting to are the people that have been playing around with him for a long time. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right.

Kind of speaking with more and like handing stuff off you watching at the beginning it's kind of quiet but the further out you get to see there's a lot more of it and they seem to be like oh yeah totally we're working no problem this is all good but there's a lot of planning it looks like going on right now okay what is about to happen um billy being a person who is a being familiar with cycles and ebbs and flows in nature and uh the the cycles of uh predator and prey you would guess that in probably two days just before you get to where you're going eggs and his crew are going to attempt a mutiny whoa whoa fucking shit that's very useful information you're the adventure boy now billy I'm the adventure boy cool do you tell any of this to crow um no I just crow is still talking about it I'm not talking about it I'm not talking about it I'm not talking about it talking about thing he's just the delts they're just so carved no he's he's been working out for a while um listen I have to go to the bathroom okay let fly my boy whoa welcome to ship life what in the crow's nest the world is your toilet isn't it beautiful I thought this was just dirt I thought it was just so dirty up here just the regular dirt I'm gonna go I'll be right back and as you go you see the an arc of liquid start sailing down from the crow's nest and crow going I'm free free as a bird I'm the king of the world I I scurry thing looks really busy right now I don't know billy is like standing on the deck like what do I do you do see tuck and perel at the back of the deck okay yeah I'm gonna run after tuck yeah billy what the fuck is going on I why are you covered in shit I didn't know I'm stuck up there with a very nice man named bernard and it's close quarters and weird stuff happens there anyways something else anyways I was looking around doing some spying stuff and I noticed that eggs and some other crew seem to be like really friendly with each other and like they like and like they have like the secret smile on their face like they're sharing secrets and I think I don't know I feel like they're gonna do something what do you think they're gonna do billy I don't know like a mutiny or something like what what is it on a ship when they try to take control a mutiny or something and perel nods and goes ah yes the mystery is afoot yeah benedict was really weird to me was he yeah he made me fucking hide a box full of what sounded like an angry bird or something what yeah should we tell you tell me what the ving stand there and you look at the battle of the deck there's two guys like holding on the ropes like it looks like they're gonna be sucked off the front of the boat I got these jerkoffs holding the boat those jerkoffs that are gonna get sucked off the front of the boat as you put it oh no that's what you call a guy who holds the rope of the sail you've never been on a ship before I've never been on a ship before oh I'm sorry man I don't know if we could do this blow job I feel like we're gonna get sucked off listen you jerkoffs you can do this blow job all day I have faith in you you're the men um sorry thing you looked really busy up there um anyway I told I tell ving what I told tuck and perel how long do you think we have I don't know maybe a day or two should we tell maggie yes I feel like we should tell maggie we should tell her very secretly so they don't get suspicious yeah do it really smooth like hey no secrets here we're just a couple of friends hanging out hey everyone it's just a couple of friends hanging out okay okay 2d6 plus charisma billy sorry you're yelling on the deck trying not to be suspicious nice eight plus two is ten okay and the helmsman that was giving you a side long glance goes okay then continues to use fairy something on him yeah for sure he got charmed uh yeah so you're gonna head down and tell maggie yeah but also kind of want to know what's in that ball yeah for sure yeah here's the here's the thing to consider and perel says here's the thing to consider I forgot I have a point of view character that I can use to describe my ideas this is working out great if we go to maggie too soon we might tip them off that's what I'm wondering they'll have the element of surprise but if we wait and see what they're up to maybe whatever is in the box we can use as leverage can ving communicate with caroline I was thinking as a former speaker of the silent word because ving knows the silent word maybe he can use some of the silent language that's an interesting unspoken language of the librarians to kind of let her know that something's up but not to act but to put her on sort of watchful yeah right is caroline on the ship yes caroline is on the ship she's like maggie's right hand like she she sticks around yeah how do we know we can trust caroline oh she has been shady in the past she was spying on us for a long time she was spying on us for maggie though but wait can we really trust maggie perl starts to look around and is like what the fuck are we doing on this boat we might have trusted too fast too soon we do this all the time oh my god what if they wanted me what if you just delivered me to them oh oh no oh no perl's a really good way for sean to see descent on this boat what if you can't trust me what if I'm the mutineer and then I uh I lead in and I put my fingers in the back of perl's pants pocket and I pull out all of your halfling pipe leaf and I'm like he's paranoid he's paranoid as fuck because he's just been smoking wheat he's rubbing his eyes a lot well I mean I don't think that's all of it yeah it's definitely not you smoked a lot of it dude no I that's not what I okay that's for ceremonial purposes yeah and it's for sarah moi okay uh anyways okay yeah no no you're right okay okay maybe I'm being paranoid okay but yeah I think yeah I mean a little bit you're right we know that there there's something shifty going on well let's try and gather as much information as we can before bringing it forward but without talking to anybody we can't just go to caroline no okay okay who can go find out what's in that box well billy's a fucking thief yeah that's true I am the most skilled okay at this all right billy you sneak below deck okay you go find out what's in that box I'll show you where it is oh yeah and then I'll like stand watch I guess yeah I I tuck you and I have a lot of problems with each other but what the fuck are you talking I thought we're friends we are friends we are friends but I've you rag on me I rag on you I don't make fun of you are you fucking kidding me never mind I'm not even gonna say the thing I was gonna say what were you going out below deck what were you gonna say I was gonna say that if anybody chooses to pick a fight with you they're fucking stupid oh okay yeah that's nice of you to say so you're it's good for you to stay in guard because anybody they'd have to be dumb to try and be like that's the guy I'm gonna take on yeah totally this whole crew might be able to beat the three of you so wait what are we afraid of again you need to take a nap I'm gonna go lay down go let me know what's in that crate we have some coffee or something I'll go see what I can do and he goes over to the side of the boat and he hurls uh yeah so that's the plan billy's gonna sneak down yeah I'll come with you okay okay okay I'll stay up here I'll run to distraction on deck oh also what distraction are you gonna do I was gonna give him a display of my prowess I guess he says as he's like running backwards all right we'll start with this display of prowess okay he uh uh oh no uh he's running backwards and he leaps up into the air through the space between the mass and the in the boom uh and grabs it with his feet with his knee pits and spins around a bunch and then hangs upside down with his arms crossed in between these two guys who are having a conversation and he's like oh what's up me sailor boys whoa and he drops to the deck floor and then pulls out a concertina and starts so instead of choosing your physical prowess which we've established for the last two seasons or all of your spirit abilities which we've introduced over the last seven seasons yeah introduce musical prowess okay that ving plays the concertina badly uh so you're gonna have to roll I was gonna say defy danger dexterity uh-huh because of all your flipping and then I was gonna say defy danger charisma because of the concertina and then I decided you're gonna roll both because you went too far on that description my friend all right so 2d6 plus dexterity this is real like uh disney live action from the 60s scene all right dexterity first okay I got uh eight uh eight great okay so yeah you do your little flip and everybody goes and there's a bunch of people like dancing around as you start doing your thing you hear crow like high-pitched scream from like a girl at a rock concert and a pair of underwear flop down on the deck they flop with weight they splat down uh and now 2d6 plus charisma for your concertina performance okay which you definitely just swiped from somebody on the ship oh yeah on my way back I found it seven all right and you break into a rendition of a sailing song that ving heard after first leaving the frozen north you caught a boat down to the principalities cool so tell me about this song it's a song that he uh learned when he was taken captive once it's a pirate song oh so it's like fucking up merchant ships nice which maybe is not like bringing a lot of good luck to the so it's about um but depending on how into it these guys are uh-huh it like would really like suss out like yeah that's it it's a smuggler song oh yeah I like that so he's trying to get it the captain knows not what you bring oh the captain knows not below the deck is all sorts of things I brought them secretly on board when the captain sleeps I'll cut her throat his name is maggie her name is maggie I'll cut her throat when she sleeps at night he's singing nobody's really specific yeah it was like when you were like that captain knows not what you bring then people were singing along and then you were like I snuck stuff on the ship and I'm gonna kill maggie cole at night everybody's like what the fuck is he talking about let's cut that part the sea is wet and the sky is bright okay they all yeah they're like yeah yeah it is nice I know this part yeah yeah and people start taking up the uh they're actually yeah so that's a good way to to think about it there are one or two people in the crowd that take up the song with their own verses like sea shanty style and there are a couple of them and you're like why do you know this song you know what I mean yeah so there's like a a halfling woman who takes up the song and you're like okay noted and then there is a human probably about 21 years old a boy with real thick arms and he's like oh my god I'm gonna kill maggie cole at night and then he's like oh my god and he also takes up the song and he's got a tattoo of a bear across his chest and you're like noted so that's some information that you get from that and they're distracted for now yeah there's a whole uh song going on we cut to tuck and billy sneaking below decks we are adventure boys sneaking down the stairs we are adventure boys uh nobody can fit fucking shit billy you're doing great no I'm not doing great I'm not doing great I'm not doing great I'm not doing great I'm not doing great No, I'm not good at this.

It's fine. It's just all, it's all about the rhythm. Sneaking down the stairs. We are adventure boys. Sneaking down the stairs. We are adventure boys. Sneaking down the stairs. Okay. 2d6 plus dexterity to sneak. And you both have to roll it because I really like one of these. I really like something that might happen. A 10. 10. Fuck. I really, I'm just going to say it because I really like the idea of Tuck being like, we are adventure boys. Sneaking down the stairs. We are adventure boys.

Sneaking down the stairs. Way into it. In the meantime, the guy that would have noticed us if I did, that is like elbow deep in like a plate of pasta. Like so into it. He doesn't notice us chanting and going to. Yeah. He's elbow deep in a barrel of pasta. Like he cracked open one of the barrels and was like, everybody's distracted upstairs. I'm going to get me some pasta. Oh my God. He could get his hand chopped off of that. Everyone is doing espionage. Everybody's working for themselves.

Let me tell you about the golden age of sale. Everybody was a dirt bag. It was like the worst people in the world. So yeah, you guys creep right past him and you head down. You got a 10. So you're not going to, I'm not going to make you roll multiple times. So you make it down to the spot that Tuck was forced to hide the crate in. You hear a scrabbling through the door. This is it. Secret room. Oh yeah. Okay. It's locked. Tricks of the trade to pick the lock. Okay.

And I'll, I'll, I'll like block him with my body and look around. Plus dexterity. That's nine. Okay. You want eight? Yeah. I ate by blocking him with my body. Yeah, totally. And I may be like, cause the lock is kind of high for him. So I put them on the shelf that is my butt. And then so he has like a better purchase. Tuck's dump comes in handy once again. Seven. Okay. Great. Yes. Uh, so that makes Billy's nine to 10, which means you do it. No problem. Yeah.

So I, I just have that copper spoon that I keep in my hair now since I don't have the copper pin anymore. Yeah. And I click, click, click. And you pop it right off. All right. So let's, let's get in there. All right. Here we go. All right. Sleep. Yeah. And the crate is where Tuck left it. Uh, there's another box in there and the, the crate with the scrabbling is nailed shut for sure. Can I use fairy dust? To make it fall asleep? Yes. 26 plus charisma. Oh yeah. Seven plus two is nine. Okay.

So you just blow it through the hole. Yeah. And you hear like, and you hear like a clacking, like weird. Huh? Huh? Tuck takes the waning knife and he jams it in between. Yeah. And he like wriggles it open and then he rips the top off the box. Nice. Um, inside is a very strange little creature. It's front half has a taloned claws and bright, vibrant plumage and a head ending in like a hooked black beak.

And the back end is the feathers transition into silky brown fur and very grippy hand looking back limbs and a long tail with a little tuft of white on the end. What? Like a bird monkey thing. Yeah. It looks like it looks like a bird monkey in my head. Like a parrot, half parrot, half monkey. Yeah. Are you serious? Roll a spell or something about it maybe. Oh yeah. Yeah. Billy roll a Spout Lore about this. 2d6 plus intelligence. Holy shit. Did we just succeed? 10. Oh, it's good.

Cause I have zero intelligence. Okay. Perfect. Oh yeah. Beautiful. Uh, interesting and useful. So Billy, you've been around a while. Uh huh. This is an exceptionally rare animal called a Griffin. Oh, Oh, Whoa. And it is a little unusual cause you've only heard of like certain kinds of Griffins like regional, but they're always very rare. And this one appears to be like half Macaw and half monkey. Wow. I've only ever seen paintings of these. They're very, very rare.

And you know, as somebody that has seen value, uh, traded many, many times, extremely valuable. Wow. Okay. Wow. And now you're struck by the fact that you've, you've ripped the top off this crate that contained secret smuggled merchandise. And you hear footsteps quickly approaching. Fucking shit. Oh no. And that's where we're going to end it for this week. I'm your game master, Sean O'Hara. Joining me as always playing Tacoma dome, the barbarian, Abdul Aziz. So long.

Playing Ving, the half elf sailor, Paul Oppers. Oh, hi, mateys. And playing fat Billy, the halfling thief, Jessica tie. Bye everyone. Uh, thank you to Aaron Reed, our incredible intro and outro music composer. That sentence started weird and ended, fine. Uh, thank you to all of our Patrion supporters that support us around the world. Uh, you can find us on Patrion at patrion.com slash Spout Lore or Spout Lore.com slash money, please.

And thank you to discord user Quinn for the name Addernack all water, which started as pattern act all water, but we took away the P cause we already had a wizard with a P name and we liked the name so much that we just wanted to keep it anyways. Uh, that is something that $10 patrons do on our community discord, which is open to anybody. So feel free to join in, hang out, just chat. We're always in there fucking around. You can find us on the internet at Spout Lore, most places.

And thank you most of all to you for listening. We'll see you next time. And so ends the tale of adventures. Three who tried the best they can, though dumb and scared and lost. They be for times of rest in revelry. And though our journey, maybe lie, a conclusion. We will not leave you without a resolution. Return next week to hear some more whilst you commute or do your chores. And for you, I'd gladly Spout Lore.

Spout Lore is made possible by contributions from our listeners. If you'd like to support us, go to patreon.com slash Spout Lore. Thank you. Spout Lore Here we go. Playing Ving the Half-Elf Druid, Paul Oppers. Hello. Hey, Paul. Hi. Hi. Hi, Tuck. And playing Fat Billy the Halfling Thief, Jessica Tai. Say hi, Jessica. I will. Hi. You're like the page master. Something's melding into our world here. When last we left our heroes, we- Start again. I don't know. I think this is the intro now.

When last we left our heroes, they had concluded a meeting with Maggie Cole of the Mender, and then started another meeting with Maggie Cole of the Menders after arriving at the Clearwater with the intent of a sleepover. I guess. And then through discussions with Maggie, we discovered one. Wicker the Cat is back. Billy and Wicker were reunited, and Wicker and Black Spire were briefly united, made quick friends of one another. And then we headed back to the city.

And then we headed back to the city of McCall, because you all decided that you wanted to be involved in the acquisition of these two wizard boxes. Well, yeah, we're the stars of the podcast. Exactly. Makes the most sense, really. I mean, you subcontracted a quest a little bit ago, so it's not hard to believe that you would do it again. One box we now know is contained in a vault within a glacier in the frozen north that was the Tower of a Wizard and contains a hotspot.

And the other is in- in the I don't know like the time fucked space weird marshlands oh that the river wars happened in where mother never was lives yes uh and maggie says that she does not know the exact location of that box because it's always on the move uh which is an interesting tidbit to have what was that I think my my my my heart this is off but my heart went the box is in the hithering the hithering like at the you know just like too many things coming together yeah so funny oh that hurt I had the same thought too I was like but what is but what I mean I remember telling you guys that there were rooms upstairs and you were just like so what cool and then you slept in the living room where there's a box in the fanny pack oh what if one of the rooms opens into the fanny pack what if there's a box in the wallowing sal what if the wallowing sal is hither and yon what if francis is a box just the podcast is collapsing in on itself that's over that's the last holy shit this was the last episode we did it uh the actually the answer is to destroy this zoom recorder all you all the audience hears is like a gun cocking and then the the beginning of a bullet being shot uh and we headed back to the city of mccall then to the margani library with maggie cole into and black spire somehow uh balco met maggie cole was was flustered dove into his sand boat called himself the speed master after you guys said that she was called the spear maiden he almost hyperventilated and uh you took maggie to meet farah and then you you were asked to leave because there was some sort of standoff going on yeah and you met up with perel telling him the plan that you're gonna leave this continent to go track down one of these boxes and after telling him that the box was located in a glacier in the frozen north he seemed upset yeah and that is where we find our heroes now not her who um a wizard yeah it's a wizard well yeah uh-huh let's go let's go back up no no no named and why are you nervous okay okay all right so her name was is was probably was adernack all water uh she was sort of the unofficial uh leader of the gathering oh whoa and she as far as I know was at the time the oldest living wizard whoa uh yeah I think oh god she was somewhere in between three and four thousand years old I don't know that's older than me wait you're less than I don't know it feels so big eternity it feels like I should say yes it feels like it uh yeah I don't know the exact number between three and four thousand but it's in that range yeah um and she uh I embarrassed myself in front of her okay it brings up weird memories you embarrass yourself in front of everybody yeah but only rarely embarrass myself in front of the oldest living wizard and the leader of our conclave what what did you do uh it was like I was at my first gathering uh and it was like you know there's always these kind of mixer parts of it where we have like food and drink and everybody catches up it's what what sounds like a job fair it is a job fair yeah that makes sense these are people after yeah I don't know what to tell you it is a job fair it's like an industry kind of thing right wait were there like booths set up well I mean yeah like everybody kind of uh you know there were people that were presenting what they were working on was there corporate bards there oh no it was a corporate barge there oh no it was a corporate barge there oh no it was a corporate barge there oh no it was a strictly closed event if there were any sort of if there was any entertainment they were wizards uh illusionists uh auditory wizards you know that kind of stuff so is it catering wizards too yeah okay yeah there are wizards that their whole thing was like food when you said there are wizards their only thing is food just because eyebrows like yulialated basically I don't know I mean yeah why did we get stuck with the frog one I mean like you know there's uh there were actually there are transmutation wizards who uh their whole they did food like they would uh take certain ingredients and turn them into other ingredients and then turn that into food there were uh it wasn't just a chef it's not just a cookie sure that wasn't like mirrors used to do that I know but I mean like this is an apple now it's bread oh cool this is bread now it's a dog so it's what I do yeah kind of it's your switcheroo oh yeah well actually I mean I we don't need to get into the weeds on this but thaumaturgically billy swaps one thing with another thing in space switches it wait figuration wizards rearrange matter on a molecular level wow wait so every time billy's ever turned a thing into chocolate he's just switched the object with chocolate somewhere else oh my god can we cut to one of those times somebody's chocolate guy yeah there's a bar stool there's just like a a lady's wine club that's like oh forget love I'd rather fall in chocolate and then they take a bite out of a piece of chocolate and it becomes the wood from a chair yeah they start writing immediately it becomes a brawl how could you do this valerie and it gets bad brutal um yeah so transmutation wizards uh rearrange matter on a molecular level and there were transfiguration wizards you know I don't know if you've ever heard of transfiguration wizards you said transfiguration I got mad at you a while ago and it's because they just make things look like different things but it's still the thing inside yeah so like you could make an egg look like an orange but you're gonna bite into an egg that looks like an orange pretty great prank though oh god they're fucking insufferable uh anyways yeah so we it was like a one of those a mixer and I spilled some soup on her and I tried to make it better by being like oh no problem I'm a transmuter I'll just transmute it into part of your robes oh no and I transmuted her whole robe into soup so she was naked uh no she always wore this like like this skin tight sort of work suit underneath her robes I don't know why because nobody knows what she did wait nobody knew what she did yeah nobody actually knows what all water is and I don't know why I don't know what she did I don't know what she did I don't know school was what was her specialty of magic that's what I meant sorry especially we called them schools I mean what did you see her do anything I saw her arrive at the gathering and command much respect stories um they say that she made that glacier uh they say that she when she received her magic she was a part of the glacier that was kind of brought her to the glacier into sentience by her magic holy shit but yeah nobody knows what she does so anyways it was an embarrassing thing she's probably dead though so it doesn't really matter but I just brought back a lot of memories when I thought about the glacier but if we got to go there then I can maybe see oh I can maybe see what her deal was if some of her stuff is still around or some of her research yeah I could gather some of that maybe she kept a diary too whoa and if there's a vault there oh maybe some of her stuff is still around I don't know I don't know I don't know I don't know still works he's like rubbing his skull now he's like all the possibilities oh yeah if she had like stuff maybe we can take some of it uh yeah maybe just take it that'd be great yeah no we can talk about it for sure we can talk about it when we get there if she's dead it's not grave rub no wait if she's dead it is grave rubbing and it's not stealing yeah and it is legal uh-huh I just don't I want the stuff anyways we'll talk we'll just pack up I'm gonna go pack up okay okay I'm gonna say bye to a couple people and pack my stuff to who hey you know I've made friends and then he leaves okay okay we I want to follow him yeah we're gonna follow him uh he sees you following him go away what we're just yeah going the same way you guys can come with me it's not like I it's not like I'm hiding who I'm friends with I mean I'm just gonna go say bye to my instructor okay well we will also say bye to your instructor yep okay he goes and he packs his stuff and he's looking at all of you while he does it we're watching what is wrong with the three of you nothing what do you mean how do you want us to answer that okay he just finishes packing up his stuff puts it on his shoulder and walks through you to his door and he leads you to like the uh sparring chambers of the speakers but we're walking five feet behind him we're not walking with him no yeah and he keeps turning around like why don't you just you guys are being so upsettingly weird you'd think I'd be used to this by now but I'm not and he hears a bunch of whispering between us yeah like he's gonna say bye to his teacher like you remember that kid in school always let's say goodbye to the teacher at the end of the day that does track he seems like that kind of kid my theory is that he started a romantic relationship while he was here going to say goodbye to the person that he was romantically involved with I have nothing to add bill he doesn't give a shit about this at all I'm just curious and I saw you guys follow him so I thought I should also follow and he gets to the door and he looks at you you're gonna come in yeah yeah I don't I don't care anymore okay we are being very weird and just goes and approaches uh there's like a uh old dwarf woman who he walks up to and is just speaking to you like I'm just wanted to let you know that I'm going to be leaving the library perhaps for good and I wanted to thank you for giving me the opportunity to learn under you and to get a little bit of my agency back and I will take the lessons that you have taught me on into the world forever so thank you and I just wanted to uh yeah uh thank thank you so much and he like bows a little bit and she bows back and they shake hands and he comes back to you was that worth it for you no I heard no not at all okay I fucking sucked tight let's go to the cafeteria why don't you tell her what you really feel what do you mean what I really feel are you sure that's that's it oh my god you people's oh and he just walks past you you gotta speak from the heart man fuck you it's okay feel your emotions bro we're just trying to help someone or something grow bud he's gone well that that gumbo isn't gonna say goodbye to itself I guess you're going to the cafeteria to say goodbye to a dish all right yeah let's go what's his name louise louise yeah it is louise is there birdie is the night shift yeah yeah it is the day thank you hi louise oh hello there billy today is a day I knew would come but it came far too soon what do you mean billy we're leaving say it ain't so little boy it is so oh my son we're on the other side of the cafeteria but we're like what the fuck he needs other dads he can't be his only parents and louise comes out of the kitchen and he kneels down on the ground and he hugs billy you made the best food I ever ate oh you were the best eater of food I ever did see my friend can I say goodbye the gumbo of course you can't come with me more frail and picks you up and carries you into the kitchen and you're standing in front of a huge pot of louise's gumbo I I touched the pot and I'm like ow the gumbo has blessed you billy yes the mark of the gumbo is upon you thank you gumbo for days and days and many days of happy eating and good memories the shrimps were always so fresh the other stuff was so good I don't know what's in you but but I love you uh louise sets you down on the ground and he gets down on one knee and he puts his hands on your shoulders he says billy there's something I want to tell you I've never shared this with another living soul since my dear sweet mama passed what is it secret ingredient is peanut butter it's peanut butter really thank you thank you louise I want you to hold this information dear to your heart my boy I'm going to the peanut butter will always be sticky to my heart and in my soul oh billy and he hugs you and he hugs you really tight I I hug him tight and then I I do one last look as I walk away goodbye louise bon appetit billy and he turns around and then billy walks out and gets in the lunch line and immediately sees louise again one please hello billy would you like a bowl of gumbo thank you and his face was red now it's just perfectly clear yeah yeah and then over the loudspeaker you hear would speedmaster bulko please come to the motorpool speedmaster bulko you hear that get cut off and you hear bulko go I'm not a speedmaster I'm not a speedmaster I'm not a speedmaster I'm not a speedmaster I'm not a speedmaster I'm not a speedmaster please call me uh master engineer bulko there's a private matter if I found out who said that I'm gonna beat their ass you just hear cackling yeah you hear a bunch of people laughing high-fiving on uh do you have anything you wish to say to louise or the gumbo no I think you've you've said a lot I I do like this peanut butter trick it was a hard goodbye I understand if it's too difficult for you to let go that way well I mean I think we just don't care as much as you do billy you don't have to be brave it's okay thank you billy I really appreciate you uh caring about how we're feeling in this moment yeah it's really kind of you to care about our feelings yeah thanks I guess trying to reinforce what like I'm just emotional and like uh whatever take my gumbo that really that really that really that really that really that really that really that really that really that really backfire it's so hard raising an eternal child who is not human you're doing a really good job thank you you too I thank you I wouldn't be able to do this without you my friend ditto yeah and we're really holding up the lunch line yeah it's like 15 librarians the fuck there's not gonna be any cornbread uh yeah is there anything else like okay let's think about what else has been happening in the library uh roth is still here oh fuck fuck roth also uh the pretty doctor uh yeah maresh elnor yeah and you billy says oh right maresh elnor is still here and then we you hear a bunch of chairs screech and then like just the doors flapping open and close as both dunk and big sprinted out of the library say I'll meet you I'll meet you there 0.58 seconds later the door of the medical wing bursts open ving licks his fingers and fixes his eyebrows tag is worse cardio than ving so he's still hyperventilating on the ground I got here first I got here first I got here first hey buddy head take a seat take a moment then he strides over to him you walk down from the mezzanine to the uh medical pit and you see maresh she's actually got like uh like elbow length uh gloves on and she is up to one of those elbows in the body of some horrid looking crawdad man like she's digging around in there and you guys recognize these as the chules from oh whoa wow gross she's got a chule on a table on its back and she's like up to her elbow in its guts yuck yeah ving got a foam finger that says maresh number one doctor yeah uh this is a closed theater please could you leave I'm doing some very delicate very delicate biopsy work and she comes out with a wet handful of meat well she puts it in a tray and hands it to another uh medicant that leaves what a woman you uh just just we we gotta be heading out now you're leaving we've got to leave I'm terribly sorry oh I'm so sorry to hear that I'm so sorry are you that's nice to hear I am um thank you for everything that you've done and uh I wish you well on your journeys goodbye maresh yes I have a poem that I wrote for you please make it fast tom no tuck my name is tuck I'm sorry tuck yes she called you tom shut the fuck up ving tom doming a dome fuck you fuck you fuck you okay is it short it depends when I stop talking oh no okay very well and we're still up on the balcony right I thought you came down oh I took his up on the balcony right no we were like great okay then she's looking up at you all right to the beautiful maresh I can really see your flesh whoa some of it is exposed and some of it's under clothes and I did spy with my little eye the cutest button nose and then I look at ving because I think we're doing it together now pretty good uh compass roses are orange and then he realizes that he's trying to make a poem he's picked the word orange to rhyme with and the jules eggs are orange and neath the sky so full of light is a man and an elf wishing you a good night and then we bow make sure you close the door when you leave if she had a phone number I'd ask for it thank you for bringing us roth we have learned a lot I will say I will say that uh you bringing roth to us has uh progressed quite a lot of our understanding of the interactions between material and spirit so thank you for that oh Spout Lore Spout Lore oh my god yes 2d6 plus intelligence nice I got seven holy shit so something interesting but not useful um okay so through study of roth in his um command of such over the uh elemental spirits we have determined interestingly enough through a combination of medical and spiritual research that there is an aspect of the material in the spirit and an aspect of the spirit in the material like roth put himself in the spirit realm or there's always in general it is a mingling what did you find of the ink um the binder it was a conduit of sorts yes it just allowed it's um it's not hmm how to describe this to the layman how to describe this to the extreme layman um it's metaphysical salubricant yes it bing has you look bing has put his sage glasses on and you look over at tech and he's put his nerd glasses on that is an interesting way to describe it it eases the passing of the energies between oh uh while also binding the spirit to the material anchor so there is part of the material realm in the spirit realm that is what we've been able to determine through this it it was a it's a connection that many have posited over the years but seeing such a uh story of the spirit realm is a connection to the spirit realm and to the spiritual realm dark representation of the two in such a tense and violent environment has very much progressed that theory by, I would say, five to ten years.

So thank you for that. Cool. Goodbye. Take care. And she punches her fist back into the chula and starts rifling around. Oh, God, wish you'd do that to me. That's when Billy walks in and I'm like, uh… He puts earmuffs. He just turns right back around. And is there anywhere else that Billy wants to go? Or Bing and Tuck? I guess say bye to Black Spire because he's going to be back in the caves. I also wanted to go and say goodbye to, I'm going to have trouble with the names, but Torch. Oh, yeah.

Ama, Farhan, and Farhan. We should all go. I wanted to just quickly just one last time use Eyes of the Tiger and see where they are in the… Yeah. They are in their room, but they're out of their chairs and they are having tea and playing some sort of board game. Is it scribbles? No, it's not scribbles. That's far too high action for these two old men. They're playing whatever the spell or equivalent of chess is.

Oh, there's like little wooden cubes and they move them around on a circular board, but the cubes like get stacked on top of each other and go back down like as they move. Across the board. Like tabletop cube. Yeah, like cube. Yeah. Maybe it's called like the Dance of the Giants or something. Yeah. I like that. And it's about like empire building. It's kind of like half Settlers of Catan, half chess because like the Giants had a massive empire before and they were super technologically advanced.

So there's points that you get about like how tall your towers end up being and stuff. It's called Keystone. Great. Very cool. Once a tower, we just a certain height. You can't knock it over. Yeah. Then maybe the Dance of Giants is like a specific strategy within Keystone. Yeah. Actually, part of Keystone is that the towers always fall. Oh, that's like part of the. Oh, yeah. Nothing stands forever. Oh, so cool. Yeah.

And they're just drinking that saffron blend of tea that suppresses their possession and just having you know, old man conversations. Okay. Yeah. I would like being would like to go and say goodbye and have any information that they've come to. Okay. So yeah, cool. You walk through the library to the door to their chambers. Enter. Hi. Ah, hello. Hello there. Do you like to come in? Yeah. Yeah. That sounds nice. We're just finishing up a game here. Keystone. Yes. I could never get the hang of it.

Who's winning? Ah, well, I believe I'm quite close and Hama goes, no, not even close. I'll get you one of these days. My friend one day. These guys are my favorite odd couple. What brings you to our chambers today? Well, we kind of have to get going a little bit and we just wanted to say, I guess bye because felt like we should and I guess thanks for all the information you've given us over the last little while.

Of course Hama says it's the smallest service that we could provide for the three people that have given us our lives back. And Farhan is like, yes, without your intervention, I would have been in the clutches of that thing for flame knows how long I could have been the torch for millennia more. Thank you. Well, we're just glad that we could be part of the process that fell out this way. Okay. Need to thank us. What of the investigation into the dark guard?

We're all pretty silent because we really did not do much. Oh, yeah. Dark guard. Oh, right. You know what? I think that's something that we have to figure out on the way. I have been having dreams lately. I may be able to provide one piece of information. I want to give him my ring. Yeah. Okay. He slips it on and clasps his hands in front of him and says, what do I do? Think of your dream. Oh, and then we'll see it very well. And he closes his eye. He's got to close both of them.

Closes one and then the other and it's the perfect move. And it's more impressions like it's not a lot that you can see, but you feel this overwhelming feeling of like anger and anxiety and like passion which you assume after a few moments to be the feeling of zealotry like that. He felt all those years just this like righteousness righteousness, but also like panic and fury. Whoa, which is a very uncomfortable feeling and that's how he felt all the time. Wow.

That's why whenever you talked to the torch, he was like simmering with rage like even when he was calm. He had the feeling of someone that was about to boil over. Oh, yeah, like one of those like red dudes. That's like yeah, but those old white guys that are just like I have to wait for this store to open when I'm already here. Yeah, I want my new balances now. Okay.

Yeah, and you feel the the righteous anger and fury being directed in one way for quite a long time and then an outside force causing it to become directed in another way. Whoa and it's honestly hard for me to find a way to describe this in a way that makes sense, but it's basically the feeling of directionless passion and then being given a purpose. Oh and is that when he became the torch?

That is the feeling he takes you back out and he tries to explain to you like it's still muddy to me, but I think what I have discovered is that the torch while forwarding the goals of the dark guard was not itself a member. The dark guard may not have been the demons themselves, but others people who are using the demons to do something in the world. That is what I believe. Yes. I'm sorry if that doesn't do much for your quest. What that that's amazing. Thank you.

I'm glad it can be of some help and I go up and I give him a hug and he hugs you like the nicest grandfather hug by Grandpa Farhan. Goodbye, Billy. Thank you for everything. You're welcome, I guess and by Grandpa Alma. I hug him to Billy without you. I don't know what life would be and he pats the side of your face. Oh, thank you. Is there anything we can do for you that might help you on your way? I have one request anything. Can you visit Black Spire sometimes? They nod and smile.

Of course we would be most pleased. Yeah, he gets lonely and he doesn't like nerds, so he won't like you guys that much, but it would be nice for us to know that you someone was looking out for him. Ving says he likes this and he gives him the gives them the pocket of sun sun chunks that he's been carrying around effectively handing over a fortune to two men that don't care about money. Yeah, but just one a day max.

Otherwise he'll get spoiled and he'll stop doing tricks let me as you're leaving. Alma has like a thought. It's like, ah, and he picks up the teapot that they've been using. So sharing tea is a mingling of the self sharing tea with another person is a is a very important ritual and practice and I would like you all to have this and he holds out the teapot that they've been using. Oh, wow. This belonged to me as a young man and to my mother before me. Whoa. You're like a thousand dude. I'm aware.

Please be gentle. Okay. No problem. Really want us to take it. I do and it's this is a it's a I do and it's this is a it's a brass teapot. Oh, thank God. Yeah, I thought it was like terracotta or something bone China. The inside is different. So it doesn't the tea doesn't taste all medley, but the teapot itself is made out of brass. The inside is made from melted sand from lightning glass. Oh, cool. Yeah, very cool.

So sick and it has like a like a beautiful sort of combination of floral and like flame motifs. Etched into the brass says perhaps on your journeys. If you would like to feel like you could draw upon a bit of our wisdom, you could have some tea from this pot and maybe feel a little closer to us. Oh, that's really nice. Thanks so much. Thank you. Thank you. We walk out all of us carry like we move together. We bump the door with our butts. Yeah. Okay.

And left tooth and we shimmy down the hallway my left knocking a bunch of other librarians out of the way the fuck out of our way teapot coming through and you find Perel. He's got his bag slung over his shoulder. He's wearing more travely clothes than the robes that he's been wearing for quite a long time and he is got a little wide brimmed hat on a nice hat. Thank you. I had to make some hard choices when it came to hats, but this is the one I'm bringing with me like the purple sash.

It's it compliments you very nicely. Thank you. I might be practical, but I'm not a monster. I need a little bit of flair. Oh, we should go see what happened with Maggie and far and far. Oh, right. Oh, God. One of them might have killed the other one. What is that whole part of the library is exploded. Okay. No news is good news. Let's start at zero. Okay. All right, let's get down there everybody. And then we help us. What is it shimmying? What is this?

The teapot and he puts his hands under the teapot and goes, what are we doing? Agent teapot? Oh my God, basically a dinosaur and you come too far as office door and it's closed. We all listen like we put the teapot against the door and it smashes being taps the door handle like in home alone to see if it's hot. Yeah, no cool to the touch. Okay. All right, which one of us is going to know? Okay. Oh, sorry. I don't know. I'm just not. I'm sorry guys and you hear a shouted come in.

Okay, we going and you hear like, haha, like some laughing and you walk in and you see far and Maggie sitting where they were when you left afar as hair has come out of her braid and she's got like a scratch on her face and Maggie's got a black eye. I and they're like laughing with each other and they're like, oh, welcome back. Welcome back. What happened in here? Oh, you know, we just had a couple words, you know, just a little discussion between adults. All's well, all's well.

Did the words hit you in the eye? Oh, not all words are spoken Billy wise. So things have been smooth between the two of us shall we say and you have not only my blessing but my understanding in your journey away from our Hall hallowed halls. Okay. Cool. Can I ask one favor before we go? I will say yes that you can ask. All right. I've learned to be very careful with my words with you to come. Can we have like like a party for us before we please it feels like we did a lot for you guys.

So it feels like we've just be kind of going around saying bye to people. It feels pretty fucking empty. Nobody seems to really. Care that much that we're leaving. So I kind of want to have a party and nothing fancy just sort of like a heroes who saved the world send off. Yeah, and this is the food we want. We want cakes. We want many Burghams and gumbos plenty.

We need all types of party stuff all sizes all sizes and shapes and bounties of party sub and quesadillas black crunch light crunch all crunch. This is of all the things I expected you to ask me. I didn't this was the one that I expected least. Okay, we'll settle for just the party subs. No, I it's just it's highly irregular. We don't really have things like this in the library, but you guys don't have parties not in the library fucking nerds.

I'm sorry the last time that we had a quote-unquote party in the library. I had to take several. Lives in defense of a bastion of information. You remember this correct? Nope. There was an invasion that was an invasion. Oh, no, no, no. We don't want an invasion. We want a party. I mean, I suppose we could go to a lanes. We could go above the fireworks festival is tomorrow night. Oh, yes, we could also I suppose I could leave the library for a fireworks festival. It would be good for you.

You can see how afraid she looks at all of this like, oh my God, Maggie claps her hands on her thighs goes. That sounds like a great plan and it sounds like a good old time. We could have a party and then we could pack up and we could head out to see. Okay. Yeah, like we could spend one last night. You guys can see the fireworks festival that I've been talking about. That'd be great. I always want to see it. Yeah, it's dangerous. Okay. That sounds great. Really exciting to me.

Farah says I will gauge interest in the other librarians and I mean, I'm sure you understand not everybody knows you not everybody likes you. That's just life. Not everybody likes everybody likes you really but not feels like most people should know us. They know you sorry. Not all of those things apply to each of you equally. Hey, one out of two ain't bad. But I wanted to party in Elaine Springs. Very well. I will begin preparations. Yeah. Thank you.

Should we should we like make posters or anything? Yes. Yeah invites. Yeah. Yeah, because she said not no one would come because they don't like us or whatever not what she said. Okay. I'm going to make an invite for Black Spire and for Alma. I'm going to send a bookworm invite to Shia. Oh, smart. Oh nice. Yeah. Who else do we want to see before we go? Jake, I guess. Yeah, our old roommate. Oh cash. Oh, yeah. Cash great. Mm-hmm.

Well, should we invite bulko bulko should come we should invite Maggie to see if they'll hook up. He says in front of Maggie. She shrugs. Mm-hmm. Adam Adam. Is he around still? Or did he take off? No one's actually seen him in a bit. Okay. Yeah. All right, great. Yeah. Okay, cool. Is there anything you guys want to do before the party? Yeah. I have to say by the Black Spire still. Oh, yeah, he can't come to the party. He can't come to the party.

I don't know like can he yeah, all the people will be there who haven't who don't know about him. Elaine Springs though is a pretty safe town because it is like a library town base. Okay. Yeah, thank goodness. Yeah, because I was already working on my invitation from to Black Spire. What does it look like? It's a napkin. And it has a drawing of him and it's got a cake. I give it to Black Spire. He knows is down and he just eats it. Yeah. So yes for what you want to come to our party. Oh, yeah.

Okay. Sure. Yeah. Yeah party. He goes up on his two back feet with his huge front legs in the front. It's just like yeah, same. Wiggles back and forth. And yeah, and I'm a and far Han receive their invitations. Yeah. Oh, should we do a little like a montage of us like decorating for the party? Oh, yeah, totally. Yeah, decorating Elaine Springs for this party. That's really all right. Yeah, so we go up to Elaine Springs. We see this beautiful cute little Oasis town and you're decorating it.

What are the decorations look like? Chad meant under the sea. It's always a chairman under the sea. Of course. Yeah, totally. It's all mermaid themed. And it's fucking terrifying. Yeah, these are not cool mermaids. They're scary looking. Yeah, I have a bunch of like colored chalk and I'm and I'm drawing on like the out the walls of the buildings in the land Springs with like the scary mermaid faces and their pointy teeth. Yeah, jaw that opens both ways.

Yeah, and I'm hanging streamers which is just toilet paper. I'm hanging from very low. I can reach tuck takes a bunch of those hanging like light crystals and he starts like stringing them up in the main square of the library any he asks bulko to build a stage because he sent a letter to Greg that was like, can you bring a band? Oh, yeah. Hell yeah, the main square of Elaine Springs. Yeah. Yeah. Okay. Yeah, perfect bulko in the.

And the material sciences people are building a stage and some of them are like fuck. Yeah, and some of them are like this is my life's work thing is using a light version of his elemental mastery. So he doesn't have to roll for it where he's no no no roll where he's basically making like sand castles everywhere of mermaids and like cool like cool under the sea things and like little tunnels where people can go and sit in and ships have sunken ships a big clam.

So this the thing that Billy and I did is shit. And then you did is fucking unreal finish decorating. I look at things. I'm like wow. Oh cool. Incredible. Is that toilet paper pal? Yeah, it all just comes together so nicely and yeah, you know food is brought out drink is brought out by various librarians some of the people that are just employed by the library. But don't actually work in it have started to gather like oh yeah, this seems pretty cool.

Yeah, we run into the atrium and we're like party party upstairs upstairs that one band is here blood feet blood feet. Yeah, the one band that we've talked about him a call. Yeah. All right, the part of the Sun starts to set and the party begins a bunch of people from the library and from Elaine. Springs have started to gather blood feet get started. They're very unless I'm mistaken rhythmic and grading music starts. Yeah, because I believe they were sort of like they were like drone work songs.

Yeah, it was like work songs, but specifically for dwarves. So we I guess it's all just like grading rocks. It's not good. It's still instruments, but it's very like what the fuck but Greg is like, fuck. Yeah, he's at the front having a great time. I think Black Spire really likes it too. Oh yeah, black guys slap Black Spire is doing that like excited horse thing where he's like kicking his back legs and like running in a circle. It's just like yeah, so sick.

His little wings are flapping around and what are you three doing? Ving made a it's like a light Sweden. Saffron. Soda. It's like a bubbly fermented saffron soda. So he's working his soda a little carton hand in my he's got a little team set up bringing bottles of saffron pop around your bartending. That's awesome. He's twirling in like this is big bottles going up here. He's catching behind.

There's like a bunch of people like horny for Ving right now at the bar like everybody all different kinds of people are just like whoa opening bottles like against. His forearm is like iron arms. Even maresh is kind of in the background like nice. I've never felt this way before about such a dumb person. He looks at way at talking winks and tacky has an algebra book in front of his crush. I always thought I was a sapiosexual turns out about they Pio sexual bad V points right at Ving. They are.

I'm the person that I am interested in being got it. Okay, and yeah farhan and ama both take a saffron soda and they're like, ah, yes, suppressing my demons with this delicious drink and you see Uma Shusha is the demons. Yeah, they're still in the library. Is Zane around Zane is off on a rock by himself, but he's still drinking like he's still got a soda and some food, but he's like looking at the Oasis by himself. Yeah, you have heard kind of here and there Zane's been having a hard time.

Zane is the demon of wrath. Yeah. Okay, and he's been suppressing it like I like Uma Shusha and ama farhan have been but he's having a really tough time with it. Oh man, because I mean, you know, he's like he's a 16 year old kid that was like imprisoned and he was also you don't know how the possession took place. But yeah, he's not he's not having a good time. He's a real. Real party pooper. Yeah, get him out of here back. I'm in Shia shows up Shia and Jake show up just before sundown.

They don't say whether or not they're together, but they're standing pretty close. Yeah, she brings slippers. Yeah slippers three. Are there's just a wolf here a huge wall some of the librarians freak out. I so I had already stuffed bread into my ears because I don't like the band. I'm like Shia. Shia you see her mouthing words that you think look like Billy. Yeah, can I borrow slippers three? She froze her brow and goes. Yeah. Okay, and I'm like, let's go for a walk.

Yeah and slippers follows you and I want to go sit with Zane. Oh, okay. Yeah, nice. That's really nice and Zane sees you approaching and just looks at you. I wave. Hi, can I sit with you? Huge wolf comes up behind them. Holy shit. He flinches a little bit slippers. This is slippers and she's really nice. Okay. Do you want to pet her? I guess okay like reaches out and like tentatively touches her and then pets are a little bit more and more and you seem like you seem intense a little bit.

Yeah, I'll just sit with them. What's up? Just enjoying the party without the music. If you want to try the bread in your ears. I brought extra. No, it's fine. It doesn't bother me. Okay. Do you want to eat the bread? The ear bread? No, I brought extra. I mean it was in my pocket. So it's kind of got other stuff. Yeah. All right. He takes a little bit pops it in his mouth. And you sit kind of like he doesn't he's silent for a long time. That's fine.

Does Billy is Billy going to say anything or is he just sitting there with them? He's sitting there with them. Nice. He does, you know, he's. He had both legs up like really kind of like like steadying himself like arms on his knees like and he like, you know, kicks both his legs out eventually and starts to lean back a little bit leans against slippers. That's nice. Yeah, and Shia and Jake are talking to Ving and tuck. I guess I thought you're going to say making out hard.

No, they're just talking to you. You hear a clink in a crash and they're just on a table. Everybody just kind of moves away. Wow. Young love. So how's it? How's everything going? It's been a while. It's been a real while. Yeah, how's town? Oh, getting better. Yeah, kind of what's going on. Cliffside is okay. Cliffside is fine, but we're having some real trouble with Tommy Supremo and his boys. Oh, the centaur dude. Yeah. Yeah, but you know, we'll take care of it.

I think everybody generally wants. McCall to be okay. So it just depends on who wants more of it and Jake's like, yeah, no, we're pretty good. We got it under control. I think both of us together were we got it good. We're good. We're in control here together and Shia rolls her eyes a little bit is like yeah, we both were both equally in control of Cliffside. Okay, are you guys dating or what's the dynamic that we're picking up on here and Jake's like no, no.

We're not dating and Shia's like we're not but you know, once in a while because okay. Oh, so, you know, I just wanted to say that wait a second. She looks around at the party. Are you guys leaving? Yeah, do we not tell you? No, the invitation said party Elaine Springs and Billy drew a picture of a cake on it. It was supposed to say going away on it. Well, I Billy can't write. It looked like you two wrote party Elaine Springs. That's what I assume. But you're leaving. Yeah. Wow.

Where are you going? We're actually heading back to the frozen north. Oh, to go see dad. No, but well, I assume based on what I've heard about dad. If you're in the frozen north, you're going to be seeing dad. That's what I think was the last time you saw him. Oh, I've never met him. Just heard stories from my mom. The way you guys talk about your dad. It's like he seems like a fucking. Crime bus like that. He'll just know and we're there. What is his deal?

Well, he's from what my mom told me about the Rangers. They're pretty serious like their career soldiers. They're trackers. They're masters of the land. Like he identifies as knowing everything of where he is. Mm-hmm. And he's never left the far north as far as I know and other than the boreal reach. Yeah, same and like their information networks are pretty extensive. Like he'll probably I don't know how long you'll have once you get there, but he'll probably hear that you've arrived.

Does he want you back? Like what's going on? I don't know. No, from what I can tell you doesn't seem to care very much about his offspring. Well, not all of his offspring are the spirit Walker. Oh shit. Yeah. How long? We don't know. It will be back at all. Oh. I'm sorry. Hi, you don't have anything to be sorry for. Yeah, I do. And she looks to like tuck in Jake. Maybe we should maybe we should go let them kind of like sort this shit out. Jake Jake come with me. Well, let's play scribbles.

Oh, no. Okay. Yeah, I can play scribbles with you. I have a hundred. And fifty coins thing takes all the money away from talk. Yeah, and Jake walks away with tuck and Shia is like you want to get a drink go sit down somewhere. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah and Ving leaves the bar and everybody goes. Oh, but right. He's been serving this entire time. So this whole conversation has been while he's flipping alcohol bottles and a bunch of divorcees are just like, oh my God. Whoa.

Yeah, and you grab a drink and go sit. He makes two drinks very elaborate drink sets them on fire blows them out. And yes, that was pretty flashy. Mm-hmm. Some might say too flashy, but I'm starting to understand that flash. She's kind of your style. Yeah, it's a little bit of why I and she kind of adjusts her crime Lord outfit. That's like a very nice long jacket with a lot of like pouches. She's got her own flaps going on now. Mm-hmm.

Yeah, I don't hate it and you go sit down and she's sipping her drink looking into it. I don't know why but I'm this sucks. It does suck. I'm why I'm sorry is because we didn't get to make more of a connection. Yeah, I thought that we'd have time to kind of, you know, really get into the brother sister thing. I thought so too. And I'm sorry. I took me so long off the hop to to really give it its weight. And it's due. I just there's so much going on.

I've never had family like that and I have my family already and I kind of left it behind and then you showed up and it's I totally get it. Like I jumped into it so fast like I basically saw a spear that you owned with my mom's name on it and was like brother. Mm-hmm. I think I just kind of wanted it and you have it. We have it. Yeah. Yeah. I don't know.

I've been thinking a lot lately, you know about like my childhood and how it would have been nice to have a brother around especially, you know, a long-lived brother after my mom went and I don't know thinking about my mom lately. She's to sing me this song all the time when I was going to bed. Oh, yeah. Yeah, my mom saying to me to she it was this. I makes me think about dad and who he must have been. Because I think I don't know.

He seems like the kind of guy that would have written this song about himself. You know what I mean? Mm-hmm. Because the Ranger King drew back the string and aimed for other skies his arrow course through the frozen forest as he watched the Eagles eyes and she like her eyes light up as she's like, oh, whoa, what you know this one too. He said wherever it shall fall is where you'll find the key through day or night. The arrows flight will bring you back to me. That's cool. That's pretty cool.

We you know, we know we share blood. Yeah, and we know the same song. I guess that's not nothing. I have something else. I want to share with you what and he brings his unbreakable spear out in front like this and they snaps it over his knee. Whoa, holy shit. And he hands her the half with her mom's name on it. This this is as much yours as it is mine. She's like stunned. She takes it. Oh, wow. I don't know what to say. I love you too.

And she like kind of sidles a little bit closer and puts her head on your shoulder. I'm going to miss you. Hopefully I'll see you again. And we cut to tuck losing all of his money to Jake the Jackal and a game of scribbles. Dude, do you just not know how to play? No, no, no, I don't. Why do you keep saying yes, because it's gambling and it doesn't matter if you know how to play. It just matters if you're fucking lucky, which I guess I'm not.

And even though there's not even though there's not poker chips in this game, Jake puts his arm around a bunch of poker chips and pulls the words himself. I got you. Fuck tuck gets up. And he's like, fuck you. Fuck zazzles and fuck this party. I'm going to get a fucking hors d'oeuvre or something. Okay. See ya. And you go to the hors d'oeuvre table and birdies there. Oh, come on in. Son of a bitch. Come on. What do you got birdie? Tell me what you got. So this is the top half of a muffin.

Cut in half and then the bottom half of another muffin put on top, but in between his gravy. Oh my God, don't like it. I you know what I will have it. Okay, here you go. This is actually pretty good. His mouth drops open. No one has ever said that about any of my food before it's sweet and savory man. It works is sweet and say he hugs you. Okay, he hugs you so tight. Okay, this is fine. He's is his arms. His hands don't even meet around your shoulder. His because he's so much smaller than you.

I can feel him crying into my chest. That's fine. All right, dude, just keep sick with the sweet and savory stuff. Okay, I'm going to be okay. I will and I extricate myself from his hug. I grab a few more of these sweet and savory muffins. And I sorry got no that's all I was going to say is thank you. Okay, I'm going to I'm going to go now. I love you. Okay. I love you too. Okay, didn't say that. I'm going to go. I guess cut back to Billy. What's Billy doing?

Oh, Billy is making little like fairy light illusion thingies. Oh, for Zane. Nice. Yeah, what do they look like? Kind of like like fat little stonecutter bees. Oh, yeah, that's what I'm doing. So I'm telling him about like the the light. House when we're climbing and I was and like Zane, you should have seen these bees. They're so cute. But like as if they were made of like little pebbles and they made weird honey stuff. That was like rocks. I think you would really like it rock honey.

Well, maybe not eating it but looking at it. Yeah, cool. Cool. Yeah, and then we climbed to the top of the tower was really scary. But those bees really got me through. Hmm. Uh-huh. Yeah, I had I had like a like a bee I guess kind of the thing that got me through. Oh, I always thought about my brother. Yeah, when I was in there, you know, we were on the streets together for a long time. He used to make me feel really safe, I guess and I still think about him.

I don't actually know what happened to him. What's his name? Malik. It's a nice name. Yeah, he's great. He's a great guy and yeah, I'm glad that you had a bees to get you through and I'm sure those other guys they you know, it's nice to have people around that help you like that.

You know Zane, I was alone for a long time too and no one wanted to be around me and it made me mad and it was hard but I learned that it's like it's never too late to make friends and if you open up your heart a little bit then people will open up theirs to you. Hmm. It's okay if it's hard. But people are nice. Okay. Do you want to do you want to come down and meet some friends? They have party subs. Yeah. Okay. All right, cool party sub cool and he gets up off the rock.

Okay, and he grabs the empty bottles that he drinking that soda pop out of and being a 16 year old boy. He pitches them into the water. Nice. You want to throw on I do throw one. It doesn't land as far. It hits the sand just before the water class. Actually Billy that is something that you notice is he takes another one and he thinks about it looks like he's thinking about what you've been saying. Uh-huh.

And about his brother and about all the past and stuff and you can see him grip the bottle in his hand and he whips it and it sails right over the Oasis. Whoa so far. Holy shit. Oh wow. So strong. Yeah, and he rolls his shoulder says yeah. Thank you. That was really far. Wow. Tuck sees this. Yeah, he runs up. I like wave at talk like get over here. Yeah, I talk like jogs up and he was like. What the fuck was that? I don't want to it's just you know, whatever I'm getting I'm getting a hang of it.

I'm tuck like picks up a bottle. He's like alright. I'm going to see if I can do it that far to okay. Okay, and then he like wheels back and tries to do like throw it further than rat then Zane. Yeah, two to six plus strength. I guess holy shit. Uh 14. Yeah, it sails over and hits a building on the other side like smashes against the wall just further. There than Zanes and he looks at it and nods and he reaches down and grabs another bottle. I'm like say say what the fuck man. I'm your dad.

I'm sorry. It's just did you see that throw he wasn't even trying and you see like he takes the bottle and he winds up. You can see him breathing and you see the image of him flicker for a second. Whoa, and then he just fucking bang like it shoots out of his hand and sails over the building. That wall hit and he breathes in and out. It's just like okay. I think I'm done. Wow. Holy shit, dude. It's pretty tight, right? Pretty cool. Then you hear. Oh, we go. We should go. I'm going to go now.

I'm going to go get some of the party stuff. Yeah, so that is something that you can into it is the people possessed by demons that can suppress them can still tap into that. Oh really with practice. So that sorry. I'm sorry. What that just gave me an idea. Yeah, can tuck run over to Alma? Yeah, and he's like, oh my you can like let the demon out every once in a while. A little bit here and there. Yes, but I prefer not to if I'm being honest, can I can you do it to me again?

I want to I want to see what I see again. Okay. Sure. I'm sorry. I just had a bunch of that saffron soda. So there's a lot burbling. Inside me right now. I'm burping. Yeah, don't put me. I'm I'm a thousand year old man. I don't need to be burped. I can stick a finger down your throat. You can pick it up a little bit. What is it with people that think that you start as a baby and then you're an adult and then you're a baby again. Brad Pitt did that to us. Benjamin button.

Yeah, Brad Pitt is the name of a mythical creature. Yeah, it's a copper book writer. Yeah, yes, yes, but he is immortal. He cycles. Through the ages. Yeah, he's a baby than a man than a baby than a man. That's why some of his copper books are like adult themed and some of them are why a thing picture books. I some of them are crayon. So he breathes deeply and it looks like it what Zane looked like when he tapped into it looks different than what I'm a looks like and he closes his eyes.

Well, I'm a turns into your truth, right? The demon did. Yeah. Okay. Yeah. So. Ama closes his eyes and he reaches out and he grips tuck around the wrist at the base of his tree tattoo and concentrates and then opens them and looks deep into your eyes on his hot his arms hot flow. Yeah. And Alma spends a few more seconds looking harder. You know what I mean? You feel like he's looking with effort. Yeah. And then his brow furrows and he closes his eyes because I saw nothing again.

I'm willing to try something. I've never done it before, especially not under my own cognizance, but I'm going to it. I think if I try hard enough, I can see where you're going. Like you can see my future. I'm let's see together. Shall we? Okay. And he closes his eyes again. And this time he keeps them closed for a lot longer. And then stares into your eyes once more and says, it will end for you beneath a burning tree. And the last thing you say shall be a lie.

Then he just lets go and you are overcome with this feeling like a coldness just runs up and down your spine. And then the fireworks start. Thank you.

The path was laid at break of day Terry, not the road is long Say what words are left to say The road, the road, the road is long Your steps were chosen long ago Terry, not the road is long But you have miles and miles to go The road, the road, oh the road is long You know the journey has to end Terry, not the road is long The road is long But will you meet it far, friend The road, the road, oh the road is long Footprints fade like dew on the leaf Terry, not the road is long Life like song is sweet and brief The road, the road, oh the road is long Oh, the road, oh the road is long Thank you.

If you like our show and want more of it, you can check out patreon.com slash Spout Lore for an extra bonus game, bonus content, videos, and more. Should we play a song to recap? Oh, sure. Definitely. Do people like Hilary Duff? I mean, it depends. I don't really know much of her music. I don't understand how to answer that question. Is she from the Disney channel? Yeah. The Lizzie McGuire show? Yeah. Is this a song people remember? I remember it, but… So yesterday… Oh, yeah.

Jessica started us off. Your mind change your clothes. I'm gonna have to change my clothes. I ate a bunch of fish with sauce. I got ketchup and chili oil. It was too hot, too hot, too hot for me. I need sour cream and other cooling food. I needed it. The fish was too spicy for me without the sour cream. My rosacea is all flared. Oh, God. This song is really hard to sing about fish. Here we go. Now, did everybody hear what Jessica was doing and remember? Yes, of course.

If you wanna, and I want to look out the door and see if he is standing there looking at us cause he is a little… Little piece of shit with a gold tooth. Really gold. And he is spying on us for the menders now. Where'd he go? His name is Dan and his last name is Durglott. I hate Dandurglott. His straws make fucking sucks. He get us into this fucking mess. This is all his fault. If, if we hadn't gone to fucking Mudlark, he would not have gotten us to investigate the Schlossmeat thing.

The Schlossmeat. I should have stabbed him with that sheared spear. Maybe we can hang out with. If you know Dan Glott, then it is the same as to hate Dan Glott and yeah, I've changed his name a lot because I hate Colonel Dan a lot. Yeah! Cause he really doesn't. Guys, I just did the stuff that I would do because I am a man who follows his wishes and my wishes to do crime and now I wanna do crime with people that will pay me to do crime like spy on you.

I don't think that I can be blamed for that and I don't think that you can be mad for me. So don't be mad because if you think about it, it's actually your fault because you trusted me and if you were smart, you wouldn't have trusted me. Wouldn't have trusted me. Look at me. Why would you think? That I am trustworthy. Smile, gold king. Oh my god, that was great. Good job, everyone. Well done, well done. Well done, everyone. So we didn't recap shit. No, we didn't. I think we did a great job.

But I think we all kind of remember and we gotta recap it for the show anyway. Yeah. We'll get into it. Let me know when you're ready. Yeah, let's do it. Gather round, friends, let me tell you a tale of three heroes, noble and bold. A brute, a druid, and a thief who is but nine years old. You know them by name, you know them by deed. Their quests are famously daring. So here I sit, singing to you an adventure that is worth sharing.

Tuck is the brute, he knows not his home, he loves to sing and fight. Fingers half-elf, he shifts his shape and wields a spear with great might. Billy's a thief, his tiny size does mask the largest heart. Best and brightest they may not be, but their friendship outweighs their smarts. So gather round, friends, and listen close, for the tale's about to start. Hello, everybody, and welcome to Spout Lore.

I'm your game master, Sean O'Hara, and joining me as always, playing Tacoma Dome, the barbarian, Abdul Aziz. Hello, everybody. Playing Ving, the half-elf druid, Paul Oppers. Hello there. And playing Fat Billy, the halfling thief, Jessica Tai. Hi, everyone. When last we left our heroes, they had set up at the clamshell pub in Wickport to meet with Maggie Cole, leader of the Menders.

A meeting that started as a tense affair and after some pretty smart negotiating in which the party decided to share their memories of the last year or so with her via the Chamberlain rings. You shared that information with her and she decided that you could be trusted because you basically clarified a lot of the information that was given to her by a Mender and now we know former librarian Sweet Caroline. Yeah, so betrayed, we felt. Yeah, I for a second thought it was Farrah who sold us out.

Oh, tuck would have been wrecked because for some reason he implicitly trusts Farrah, but yeah, if he was like parent formed on us. No far is first and foremost the master librarian of the Margani library. She would not willingly treat with another secret society. I don't think but yeah Caroline, we keep falling in with secret society. We should do yeah to that's more than most people for sure and the Medi too.

Yeah, well, you did not fall in with them and yeah, we discovered Sweet Caroline used to be a librarian and a student of Farrah Margani and had been sneaking around spying on all of you informing Maggie Cole and we also learned another character had been sneaking around and spying on you and informing Maggie Cole. We should have known fucking damn Colonel Dan Derglott who has apparently been a Mender for a year. Plus I wonder what he's getting paid.

He hasn't been he hasn't said but he has made it. He has alluded to the fact that he's getting paid his gold tooth. Yeah, he's getting paid in gold teeth. It's going to be a sunrise of a smile is what he said. They said we could grill. We could pay you a weekly stipend or you could save it up for a gold tooth. What the fuck is a stipend? Isn't a stipend like a payment thing? I mean some people say stipend some people stipend stipend. People say stipend. Yeah.

Well, I do because I've only apparently read the word and I've never said it out loud. Don't you feel stipend? And the last thing that we learned is that now that we've discovered that magic might be the answer to what Maggie thought was the problem of magic. She has revealed to you that she knows that there are at least two other wizard boxes in the world in Mender Stronghold. Yes, Menders are in the possession of two further prison boxes. Wardstone. Yeah. Okay.

Wardstone chambers possible vaults. Yeah, probably kept in similar locations and not identical to the one that you found Chamberlain in but similar to and that is where we find our heroes. Now what do you guys were talking earlier about wanting to stay on the clear water because you didn't actually find a place to stay when you came to Wickport, right? Yeah, please. Yes. Yeah.

So I think we can we can just show up like a you know, when your kids get dropped off at a birthday overnight birthday party. We have like a teddy bear and like a pillow and toothbrush in her hand. Yeah. Our gigantic rock dog. Yeah. So that's what I've got. Yeah, that's where we are. We're on the port and we just invite us. She was like, all right, let's connect later.

To discuss what our next moves are and we what we heard was come live on my boat sleep over come stay on the boat and being has a face mask with like numbers over his eyes already on it's nighttime. It's nighttime. Hold on to tuck shoulder bumping. I think the first thing that you would run into is the harbormaster being like no, no, no, no, no, don't like trying to stop you from bringing Black Spire onto a wooden pier. Yeah, but Black Spire is not listening. He's just going.

So you just see the the harbormaster following behind you like, oh, my God. Oh, no, no, no. I say he's really nice. He never bites, but you hear as you're walking Creek Creek. So you are just waddling Walt Black Spire is waddling and Billy's probably also waddling down the pier to the clear water tuck is waddling to because the weak sauce is not sitting very well. So his buns are clenched. It is loose coming in and loose going out.

My friends thing is waddling to because he is using tuck as a guy bunch of waddlers. Just everybody's wearing nightcaps. Yeah, and you guys can't see this because you're so far away or your eyes are closed, but Greg watches you approach for twenty five minutes. Just what in the hell is he actually comes to meet you? He walks down the pier meets you about a fifth of the way from the clear water is like hi. I hand him my back my overpack sack. He takes the bag from your hand and goes.

What are you doing here? We're here for a sleepover. Remember yeah, Maggie invited us. She didn't tell me about any invite. That's weird. She must not be very high on her to-do list. Okay. All right. We can't bring that on. Unfortunately, this is our son. Okay, how dare you? How dare you? I am integral to this family quite so my good man starts rubbing. Sorry, he's just talking out to the ocean up the side of the pier. Not even looking at anybody.

He starts rubbing his eyes and he's like, okay, I'm going to make this as easy as possible for you to understand and you and you he points at tucking Billy because your eyes are open and he points at the eight side Black Spire and turns around and points at the three foot wide gangplank that is leading down from the boat to the pier and then back to Black Spire and back at the gangplank and goes understand. Yes, Black Spire will walk down the plank to go on the boat.

Gosh, Greg, I'm going to go ahead and put him in our warehouse. How about no no, you dare. No, ever as long as the warehouse is on the boat. That's fine. Yeah, you guys use crane. To get big containers on boat, right? Why is crane good for box, but not grammar is falling apart. Why crane for box, but not happy dog, but why not scaly dog? Why not my scaly dog, but box? Why box better than dog gestures around himself death metal dog, not good like box. Okay, eat my box.

My friend he just he lets you finish that and then gestures around himself at which you see no cranes how you get box of boat that he points at a person walking down the gangplank with a box in their arms. Can we build crane person grab dog? Let's let's let's put him. Let's put him in. Let's put him in the warehouse. Let's put him in the warehouse. How about how about the warehouse? How about the warehouse doesn't want us to have? I'm just telling.

I'm just saying it none of it doesn't make sense. There's no way. What if we build like a dog house boat and pull it behind us like a little doggy tender. Sure that makes more sense. No, I'm just telling you that no step between where Black Spire being on the land and Black Spire being below deck on a boat makes any sense. You would live above deck. Obviously and he skimper around and we throw treats for him and it would be a grand old time that we would all have. All right.

This is what duck is saying to Greg. We cut forward to a to a theoretical future in which Black Spire is on the top deck of this boat and you're all on the top deck of the boat to Black Spire shifts one foot to the side and the whole boat tips aggressively. Okay, it's you can put a car on a boat right not on a sailboat. Okay on a bird is a galleon. It's just a wooden ship. What if we make cantilevers? You know what they called at the side of a canoe that keeps the thing out. Oh yeah.

Yeah, we've got seven months right to build and design those just what were you going to say? I'm going to say that on galleons. You bring like tons of cannons on there. So yeah, it Black Spire is like what like three cannons three or four cannons five tops five in a bulk phase so much more than that. If it's just about balance, we can make another Black Spire. Yeah, what do we do? Honestly you're parlay. Yeah. Oh, yeah, we'll roll so much. I have so much halfling pipe. We we could give to Sean.

Yeah, and he'd be on board. I have this move that we can I bamboozle. So I'm like I want to bamboozle Black Spire out of this boat. That's not what bamboozle does when you parlay with someone on a hit you take plus one forward on getting a dragon on a boat. I like to use escape route to create a route for Black Spire to escape onto the boat.

I'm just I'm I'm frantically looking up the weights of different things to explain to you how difficult it is to convince them to let Black Spire on this boat. We don't care Sean. This is fantasy. This is a fantasy boat and we can bring fantasy amounts of weight onto the boat. Oh, no, absolutely. Do you okay? So would you guys agree that Black Spire probably weighs about as much as like an elephant because he's like big and sturdy if an elephant was made out of concrete? Yes. Yeah. Okay.

So maybe like a hippopotamus made out of concrete. No, he's way bigger than that. He could be about like the size of a German Shepherd. Yeah. Yeah. If we wanted him to definitely less than six months worth of groceries. Yeah. So a male elephant weighs up to 15,000 pounds. I knew you were googling something awesome. Yeah. And keep in mind that yeah, Black Spire is about the size of an elephant and covered in plates of rock. I think he's the weight of a car. That's what I think.

I think he's a weight of a car, but like what he's so big though. Yeah, cars big to car so big car so big you put so many people in it. You take those people to sit down Pizza Hut on 12th Avenue to celebrate your fucking birthday Sean and it's my birthday today and all I want is backspire on this fucking boat. It's not your birthday. I know that for a fact, even though I forget your birthday every year and I love that every time you have to think of a location.

Your brain is like this to dumpies 112 that it's a really good go to the only one. It's great. They have lunch buffet. Do they still know the only lunch buffet in the lower mainland is in the Richmond pizza. There's a still yeah. Yeah, you can still get one out there so close. Yeah, they have to say it just for listeners. That's a seven hour drive. That's a bus, a boat, a bus, a car, a bike, but at the end of all that a sit down pizza hut.

Yeah, at the end of all that at the end of that easily $150 spend you get to spend $799. It's only $799. Yeah, no, that's 1992 prices. No, no, no. I had a $699 one in Hamilton seven years ago. A buffet? Yeah. All you can eat? Yes. Question. They also have the Sunday factory. Sean close your computer. We don't care how heavy elephants are. I'm opening it up to look up the sit down pizza. They do not have a Sunday factory.

They have dessert pizzas that are like Nutella and like cinnamon and blueberry deep fried dough. It's basically an elephant ear. They have like a tray of elephant ears and then a tray of like regular pizzas and then in the middle is pastas. Black Spire cold pastas. I want those pastas. My God cold. Do they care if you mix and match? That's my question. They want you. They want you to.

You can go and take a whole pizza back to you and take a pizza use it as a plate put on past make more room with the pizza. Yes for more pasta. Yeah, a server bursts into the manager's office. She's back. She's using a pizza plate. She brought her own stone. We don't know what to do. We resolved nothing in that conversation. It's pretty funny. Can I can I ask why you want Black Spire on the boat right now? Because we love it. We love it. We love it. We love it. We love it. We love it.

We love it. We love it. We love it. We love it. We love him. Do you think that if he's not on this boat, he's gone forever? Yes. Yes, that's the way we think. Do you guys think that you're leaving on this boat? Yeah. You're not. You're going back to McCall. Why would we go back to McCall? Because that's where everything all of it all is. Like like I understand like I know that we're probably going to be planning like what the actionable thing is with these boxes.

But were you not planning on going back to McCall before you left the continent for good? That's how we take the boat down to where the broken shore that is a place that passes into the realm of a fire God. Yeah, I guess that's where okay everybody who thought we were going to get on the boat and go straight to the boxes, raise their hands. Okay, you can do that. You'll just be gone. You'll be leaving the city with all the people that you know without telling them that you're leaving.

I guess we need Perel. Yeah, we might need to go back. Oh, yeah, the guy time we didn't bring him with us. Let's let's say that Greg is standing with Black Spire on the pier and you guys can talk to Maggie about this shit to figure out what the plan is. Okay, so we're gonna break. We're gonna wait for Maggie to say if Black Spire come on the boat or not. Billy crosses his arms and he like I'm waiting. All right. I'll be right back and he walks up the gangplank in a couple minutes later.

Maggie is like standing at the top. The top deck of the boat is way above you. Yeah, yeah, obviously she's wearing a pink bathrobe and she's got curlers in her hair. Yes, great, clearly pulled her out of bed. Yeah, she's got a green face mask on just like Ving with a nice mug with a clearly a cup bag of tea in it. The tag it says mother's helper tea she's stressed out. Yeah, it says world's best mender cell leader and she's sipping from and she goes no. Why Billy?

I know you're I know you're small, but I also now know that you are old. You understand the the the come on the physics. He'll be just right over there. He'll be at the end of the pier in the warehouse. We can always sleep in the warehouse to if we feel like it. Yes. How about I meet y'all in the warehouse in 20 minutes and we can talk about this. Okay, I grab my bag back from Greg. Give me that this sucks Maggie. You invite us to live on your boat and then you say that our dog is too fat.

I didn't and then you say we have to live in a tool shed. I didn't I didn't invite you. I said I'll meet you tomorrow and y'all just showed up with a with a dragon also stop saying dragon. We did it. We said dog like a thousand times. Oh, yeah. Okay good move for I know. I always forget that you three are masters of subtlety espionage. I'll meet you in the warehouse in 20 minutes. Okay, fine. All right, Greg get him set up and I in the warehouse.

I find like a little shelf to put all my knickknacks on what are your knickknacks like the spoon and like a rock a couple rocks some more of the really sharp beach glass that I've cut myself on what it's just glass. It's nice and it's from the beach. I found it on the beach next to a bunch of teens that we're drinking. Yeah, and then a donut great. So okay. So yeah, you guys come to the warehouse and Greg is like we got to move a bunch of stuff.

There's a thing coming in and a bunch of the people that have like their laborers are like, oh my God, and they start moving boxes around to make enough room for Black Spire. Nice. He's like, all right guys, I'm in here, but I don't see any bones. I was just going to take a little bit of the like the sunstone plate that we brought cut for him. I'll break a little bit off and I'm like, all right, buddy, his tongue flops out of his mouth. I was like, is it yeah, it's it. I'm off.

I'm already sitting sit lay down. I'm I'm laying down. Look at me. Yeah, you're a good boy. I am a good boy. Yes, you are. I am. Yes, you are. You better give me that. Okay, quit playing games talk. All right, here we go, and then I flick it into the air for him. He like shoots his head forward. Yeah, not very far because his neck is so short. Okay, he's got jump is like, okay, okay, so good. I will be good for a little bit, but I'm gonna need some more but you do your thing.

I must stay in here. Yeah, we're gonna hang. We're all gonna stay here for a bit, right? And he immediately rolls over onto his back. He like starts to crush a crate and then goes whoops and he's on his back and his feet are up. Oh, scratch his belly. Oh, whoa. What no, that's so nice. Nobody's ever done that before. It sounds like a xylophone because I have iron fingers.

And he falls asleep and Maggie shows up in like leather pants in a linen shirt and sorry, I said leather pants and Paul looked at Abdul Tuck respects all women equally no matter what kind of tight fitting cloth they make their pants at it and she looks a little tired. She's rubbing her eyes and she leans up against a crate. So I suppose we need to make a plan. Yes. Yes. First we have to get Perel back, I guess. And he is back in the city of McCall. That's right.

Yeah, he's working at the library trying to find more hot spots. And that's two days from here. Yeah, it's about a two day trek. Yeah. Okay. All right. We can we can get some horses, camels or something. Make it a little bit faster. Okay. I mean, this is assuming of course that you three want to be involved in the retrieval of these boxes or box or whatever. All right. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Take your time. Take your time. I think we should supervise this.

I don't know if I trust all the menders with those boxes. Well, yeah, they're a decentralized network. Yeah. And they also have had very negative intentions up till now. And they always like believe the wrong people. You know what I mean? They have a history of it of like putting their faith in like fucking, Dan and the fucking torture McCall and stuff. They're very under the board. Yeah. But a lot of the ways they operate. Yeah.

Also it's like it's really important to us that Pearl gets his magic back. Right. And two is our Perel angle. And I don't think they're going to give it back to him. We have to fulfill this promise. And if it's going to be the thing that brings balance. Yeah. Maybe these wizards can help Perel figure out how to get his magic back. And maybe if we're there, we can help convince Maggie that the wizards aren't the worst thing. They're not the only problem. Yeah.

Because for us, we traveled with Perel for a few months and we were like, oh, he's actually a chill guy. Once we got that dick monster out. Yeah. Okay. Cool. Okay. Maggie, we want to be there to look for the boxes. All right. Yeah. I want you to understand this is not a this is not nothing. The retrieval of these boxes, even the locating of these boxes. Is not going to be a small undertaking. It will take you to reach as far from here. You may face challenges many and journeys perilous. Nice.

Okay. All right. Yeah. No, we're into it. I just want to make sure that you understand that this is going to be at least a season, maybe two, perhaps of your time. Billy holds up his hand. Yes. Do I have to go on the ocean again in a boat? Unfortunately for at least one of them. Yes, you do. So she tells you there is a cell that operates in the frozen north.

I have corresponded in the past with the leader of their cell and they have a vault that is located at a hot spot either inside on top of it's it's in a in the region of a glacier and that is where you should find one of the boxes. Okay. Or we should find because I'm not letting you do this without me. Well, yeah, probably a good call because the first time you sent us out alone you sent us with a cat and then the second time you sent us with a 14 year old line cook.

I now know that you are much more dangerous. There probably still will be a cat involved. That is how we often find our ways to to different cells. Is Wicker back? Oh, you didn't. What? Wicker? Wicker? Wicker? Wicker's my cat. What? Are you serious? Yeah, I brought her with me. Wicker? Where's Wicker? She's on the boat. Smash cut to is running onto the boat and bursting into every room. People are trying to stop him flying up the gang like on either side. Billy's knocking people away.

The opposite of in a hook. Yeah, it is rolling down the thing. He's rolling up his game into the boat. I'm defying physics to find this cat. Oh my God. Billy's Billy is like thud, but from hook. Oh, yeah, that's the name of that character. By the way, is thud, but that's great. Yeah, and you are running through the boat and you get to what you believe to be Maggie's. You don't have to roll. I want to certain realities to find certain realities. Yeah, sure. 36 plus wisdom. Well, look at that.

Holy shit. Five. Somebody just got experience. You know what? I'm going to put that one in my pocket. And you run around for a long time, so much so that you're like panting and sweating. Yeah, it didn't take long. Yeah, and you've gone into the same room like four times because you keep forgetting which room is following you from room to room. Yeah, exactly. Opening these doors. Whack. I you keep busting into the privy over and over and there's one guy that's like I'm trying to take a shit.

I'm sorry, sir. And I slam the door and then I lay down defeated. I'm like, I had always hoped I would see you again. Wake her wherever you are. I hope you are well. And then you hear and you feel a wet little nose press against your cheek. You open your eyes and there is Wicker the cat. Oh, I love you. Never leave me again. She starts curling around you and she's just nuzzling up against you. So happy to see you. Wow. So I carry her like a baby.

Back to the way you mean like a baby carries a baby carries a cat. Yeah, arms under the arms cat arm sticking straight out in front, but she does not normally let anyone carry her like that. Yeah, and you come back to the warehouse and Maggie is looking very happily at the two of you. She's like, oh, she's so happy to see you. She doesn't let anybody carry her like that. This is very special. She's trained not to like most people, but for some reason she gets along with you just fine.

I want to introduce Wicker to Black Spire Black Spire like rolls over and you can feel Wickers body start to tense up. Yeah, and then he opens one huge eye and he like sniffs her and she sniffs him and then she like bops her nose on his nose and he's like, ha sick Black Spire. She is not bones. So you can't eat her. I would never. Look at this little thing. Yeah, look at her. She's like she's like smaller than you and you're already so small like she's like the size of one of my eyeballs.

Yeah, and he puts his eyeball up to Wicker. I hold Wicker up to his eyeball and they just they're fast friends. He really enjoys her, but he tried. He knows that he's big so he stays back a little bit and everybody I guess just watches Billy play with a cat for like 10 minutes thing says hello to Wicker. Hey, Wicker. It's been a long time. Good to see you again. She nods to you very stately and she's like thing pleasure.

I hope all is well well enough and you oh the wonders I have witnessed it's been so many years. Presumably. I am a cat passage of time is unusual to my kind, but I have perhaps a few more gray whiskers than I did when we parted but I it does my old eyes well to see you and you let's catch your let's catch up over a plate of sardines. One of these nights let's and Maggie continues talk. Chuck snaps in front of it's rude when you speak languages. I don't know.

It's rude when you snap in front of my and yeah, so that is what so now we know one Wickers here. Sorry, and then you had other spell or yes, there is a Spout Lore to do for the second box because we know now that the first one is in the frozen north in a glacier and the second one. I think I'm going to go ahead and invoke Jessica's failure and say she only knows the general region of the second one. Okay, thanks a lot. Jessica. I'm so sorry. You did leap into danger without a plan.

Yeah, you just burst onto a ship because you're like a cat is I wasn't even wearing a life jacket or anything Billy water wings. So what do we think this general region is? What if it was in those forests where mother never was? What do you think? Yeah, that would be kind of sick. Yeah, so it's in a boggy region in the river. There's those caves. We're talking about.

Yeah, which case I think during that that session we were talking about the that area because it's like mountainous and lots of rivers. There's lots of caves. Oh, there's like underground rivers. To the underground rivers and so much crystallization of all those minerals to which is a very like power magically powerful place. Yeah, if this box is why she doesn't have a bead on exactly where it is it it part of it's keeping it safe is that it does move around within an area. Oh, yeah. Oh shit.

So cool. Somebody who like trumps the there's like a transport who keeps it safe a troll a troll. One of the trolls is like there's too many details. You guys are going to have to do this. You don't know all this. Oh my God, you don't know all this part of his back and like a rock troll award. The more you say the less it's going to happen. You got to shut the fuck up right now, but I will say that what we remember in spelt more Mall Brats.

We are patreon show available for five dollar listeners and up. We did introduce the black tree principality as well. So I think that this boggy region is on the border of the ways in the black tree principality. So it's like south eastern principality. That's so sick because like black tree is like so creepy sounding and then into bogs. Yeah, we're heading into timber and territory. Oh, yeah.

I can't wait to see Helena Bonham Carter and Johnny Depp do something racist even more racist than a Tim Burton movie. Wow, get ready guys. Season 11 is going to get us all kids. Yeah, so she tells you yeah in the second box. I'm aware of is it was kind of close to where our vault is, but it's in a boggy region on the border of the river ways in the black tree principality sort of in the south eastern area.

It's location exactly is not possible for me to know because the box itself is almost constantly moving. All right. Well, seems like the easier one is the one up north. Also, we get to meet things family then my dad's not there you I for I'm sorry. I forgot you. Yes, you are part elf. Yes, and you have family dangerous family. I mean, I don't yes. Yes, my could be a problem. He's a ranger King.

That is something that would be something to consider because while the glacier is as far as I know a decent distance away from the great forest if your father has I'll intent and is a ranger there is no distance that would be too far. That's true and then tuck he leans into Vang and he's like, yeah, she definitely didn't hear you say King after Ranger. I have no respect for Kings. What? I don't care about bloodlines and inherited titles being high fives you Kings mean nothing to me.

Okay, but if he is a ranger that means that he is skilled if he is skilled and dangerous. That is something that you will need to be aware of. Well, I've been avoiding him this long. All right, let's hope you can avoid him for a bit longer. So the glacial vault it might be time to meet him. I'm sorry continue. Sorry. No Ving snaps back. Oh, is this something that you would like to address when you arrive back on that side? Yeah, I don't know. I don't know if I'm ready.

I don't know if he's ready. There's ways of staying away from him. I still have friends in old sheer. So maybe they can hide us out and help us. Yeah. Okay, but if you change your mind, if you want to go see your dad, I might we will back you up. Thank you. Thank you. Okay. Well, if this is the case, if we're going to be going north, how much time do you need? Do you need to return to the city? You need to go get Perel. You need to I assume tie up some loose ends. What do you say a week?

Yeah, I guess a week gives us wait doesn't should we bring Maggie to the library? I was hoping so. I was hoping to bring her with us and at least Caroline wouldn't she be going there too because of her connection with fire. Yeah, Caroline has concluded her business at the library. I don't think that she would wish to return. Oh, so I would be happy to come with you. It seems like a once in a lifetime opportunity for me. I think you should if you can convince master Margani to allow me entrance.

Well, we're like basically like the bosses of the library now. So whatever we say goes. All right. Very well. Then yeah, I'll okay. Yeah. Oh, yeah. I'll accompany you and it actually would be good. I yes. I would also have some business to attend to which would be easier done in McCall. So I will accompany hell.

Yeah road trip road trip road trip road trip road trip road trip road trip road trip where the boss of the library road trip God our chance are getting less and less cohesive we have so much to be excited about so okay I guess you guys pack up and just head to McCall. After we sleep. Yeah, the warehouse. Yep, you sleep Black Spire has a great sleep wicker sleeps next to Billy Maggie goes back to the ship and do they have a tender at the ship?

Do they have like a little like a small quick boat that they're not using? I would just wanted to convert some boat to you know, there's that we said that there's a conversion place in Wickport that will turn it into a sand ship. Oh, yeah, we can just do that for getting back way faster. Oh, yeah. Like we are mode of travel. Yeah, that's cool. I like that. They they have they have other boats in the harbor that are quietly owned by the vendors as well.

So yeah, they they take one and great start getting it set up and that's done shockingly fast like half a day and they're done and yeah, you had start heading back to McCall the next day and you're just fucking ripping ass, you know, there's a day where you have to post up and camp anything you want to do talk about during the camp time. Black Spires at the warehouse still. Yeah, I assume you're probably just going to leave him and then come back.

Oh, I don't know because are we taking Black Spire with us? Oh, yeah, Black Spire would be better near the library. Are we taking him with us? Are we not? It would make almost no sense to take him. Unfortunately, fuck like it really would like even if you could get him on slash in the boat. He wouldn't be coming back out. You know what I mean? Like it's either. To build him into this thing. He would freeze up in the frozen North. No crunch is under foots of ice fucking shit. It sucks.

I know you guys all got to get pets. You got a cat. It's not my cat fucking bird. I can't have pet tucking tuck it no pet. Okay. Okay. Okay, tuck it. No pet. Then you can tell he's really upset. He's talking with a lots of words. Loses to goes on the other side of the sand, but he's like I'm gonna go eat alone next to a cold fire. Gold fire made out of your betrayal. Oh man, tuck. It's not like that.

We're just thinking of a Black Spire like I don't want to leave him behind either and I only get to borrow wicker for now. Like eventually I have to see by a wicker to I haven't seen my bird in so long. I you why you you should take Black Spire with you to the fire and you guys have so quiet time. Yeah, tuck it Black Spire leave it's like Black Spire. Let's go. I have more shiny crunch for you. Okay. All right. Yeah, this sounds good.

Took me a while to catch up because I didn't really fit on the sand boat either, but I'm here and I'm tired and I want some shiny crunch and get you take him out just into the sand. I yeah, and I just I just give him shiny crunch nice and I do because he can jump. Really high, right? Oh, right. Yeah. Yeah. So I'm like kind of like like standing in the valley between two giant dunes and like throwing shiny crunch directly up in the air and it's pretty because it's nighttime. It's pretty bright.

Yeah, and then he'll like jump from one sand dune to another and like gulp it. Yeah, he's having a blast. Yeah, I bet when he's mid jump his tiny wings are flapping trying to fly. He's finally was like just a tiny little bird. Yeah. Yeah, he's having a blast. Yeah, and then I'm like Black Spire. I have bad news for you. What's up, bro? I have to leave you behind in the library when we go look for that box. Oh, man. Yeah. Okay. Yeah, that's fair. You're too big to go in the boat.

And people say that you're too something called cold blooded to go to the frozen north. So it's dangerous for you to come. It's called the frozen north. Yeah, it's so fucking cool. Oh man, I don't want to go there. Yes, I get. Yeah, that's cool. So it's probably better that you don't come. Yeah, that's fine. That's fine. I'm fine with that. Uh, but you know, I'll stay here. I'll just kick it. I got my pad and the pad has crunch and I'll crunch my pad crunch and you're coming back, right? Yes.

Okay, fine. That's cool. I'll be here just vibing and chilling out, maxing, relaxing. All cool. Yeah, the librarians will take care of you. They'll take really good care of you and I promise I'll come back. This guy's fucking nerds. I know. I know it's going to suck, but when I come back, we're going to have a fucking metal time. I promise. Okay. And tuck knows he's probably like he's so sad. Yeah, that's cool, bro. It's cool, bro. You will be bro. We're bros.

Yeah, bros are bros bros are bros and I'll see you again, bro. Hell yeah. Yeah. Fuck. Yeah. Yeah. Fuck. Yeah. Fucking hell. Yeah. Fuck. Yeah. Check it out. And he does a somersault in the sand. It's so loud. He's just like boom. Fuck. Yeah. And then you hear everybody hears from like three sand dunes over like just dragon screaming. Yeah, and you guys just have a chill time flipping in the desert doing stunts. Yeah, we just do stunts at each other.

Yeah, I keep I feed him the rest of the shiny crunch head butting each other. Yeah. Wrestling. Yeah. Yeah, and he lets you win a bunch of times. Yeah. Oh, no, you've got, uh, yeah, man, I guess. Yeah, we got to leave Black Spire behind. Fuck. It's a bummer, but the next morning, unless there's any other camp things we want to do. Uh, do you want to do any?

Oh, no, I just while tuck was out playing with Black Spire, I went into his, uh, coin purse that he left behind and took one of the obsidian coins. Oh, I just I just I have something I want to do. All right. Cool. Sick. Yeah. Sick secret move. Does Billy notice that, uh, tuck is or that Ving might be stealing from tuck? Yeah, and he's all suspicious. He doesn't. He does it in front of you. Okay. Okay.

I've got an idea for a gift for tuck that I think he's going to like, and I think you'll like it too. Okay, but I had to take this. So don't tell tuck. I won't tell him it. My my lips are sealed. I know what that means. I should have done this in secret. I will try my very hardest to not say anything like Billy immediately goes to tuck and is like nothing like Billy's is looking at tuck like nothing Billy. Why are you giving me your secret smile?

Nothing does like a backwards high five low five to Billy. High five. Yeah. Is there anything that like do you guys want to talk to Maggie at all? Or are there any spelt lores that you want to do about topics you want to know more about? I think I'm good. I don't know. Yep. Oh, actually, I do want to ask Maggie a question. So I go over there to where she's sitting. She's just stoking the fire. Hey Maggie, what are you eating? Oh, the this it's a it's a like a fruit jerky kind of thing. Cool.

Can I have some? Yeah, sure. Here you go. Thanks. Have you seen mirrors lately? No, I haven't. Last I saw he was with you. Okay. Yeah. I think he's fine. I think he's I don't know. I've been trying to track him with with the pin and it's a it's odd. He keeps moving or the pin keeps moving or something's maybe wrong with my instruments, but he keeps popping up everywhere and Billy smiles and he's like, okay, that's all I wanted to know. Do you know something? No, I don't know anything.

Okay, Billy, Billy, Billy, Billy, come here. Come here, Billy. I just want to know is mirrors. Okay. Yeah, if he's moving around, he's fine. She nods and looks at the fire. Okay. Thank you. You're welcome. Thanks for the jerky. Yeah, no problem. It's a it's a it's pomelo. Oh, yeah. Gross. Yeah, because to make pomelo jerky, you would have to get all the juice out of a pomelo. Yeah, it's just pulp like thick, hard, dry pulp. I eat it anyway.

And the next day you load up the sandboat and you know, it's sun starts coming down again and but you see the you see the city of McCall rise above the over the horizon. Just the tower. You always see the tower first. Yeah, you see the lighthouse glowing in the the dusk sky and then the city rises and you sail around McCall through the Alcoly Desert to get to Elaine Springs.

And as you pass the city of McCall, Maggie is standing on the side of the boat with like one hand on the mast just watching the skyline because he's never seen this place before. Yeah, and she isn't it? It's incredible. You know, you forget sometimes that the world is so big. When you're so focused on what you do in your life, it feels like the world is just small, like you could cup it in your hands, but there's so much out here. I don't know. Like holding on to a judgment for too long.

It puts blinders on to what's really going on. Like how you thought about wizards. How I thought about you three and the one wizard that you know, I think that maybe you have have taken your experiences and you've maybe become a little too, you've become biased in a different way. There are dangerous people out there. Sure. We don't know who's going to be in these boxes. They could be a thousand times worse than Perel. Sure. I'm just saying it. The desert starts with a grain of sand.

She nods looking out at the sands and the lighthouse. Yeah, you're probably right. And a few hours later, you arrive at Elaine Springs and you are not, you're not immediately let into the sandboat area. The doors stay closed. It looks like a stable. Billy slams himself onto the ground like, please let me in. I'm so thirsty.

Somebody that you recognize from as just like a librarian that you've never actually talked to, but is dressed in like I work at a fruit stand outfit sees you and nods and waves you over and gives you some water. Thank you. What's your name? Uh, bingo bingo. You have saved my life today. They nod happily when you say bingo like gotcha. Where's Farrah? Why is the door locked? Well, we don't traveling with someone that we don't recognize or know.

Well, she's safe and she bingo is like, okay, I'll go let them know and disappears. Goes into like the house behind the fruit stand and then is gone for way too long for how big this building is. Yeah, I've long since finished my water. Just working your way through every piece of fruit in the store. Taking a bite. I'm like, oh, I don't know what that is, but it's really good. I'm so sour and bingo comes back and sees that a single bite has been taken out of every piece of fruit in the stand.

You're lucky. This is a cover identity. Sorry. All the fruit around it. Okay, you're good. And the stable doors open revealing the sandboat funicular and you load in and click, click, click, click, click, click, click. They take you underground to the Margani library as the doors close behind you and yeah, you're in the library. Randy and Balco are working on their sandboats and Balco sees you all and goes, what up brothers? It's like, Balco, what's up?

Oh, you know, just working on Big Mama here trying to get a couch in there. So awesome. Yeah. Yeah. You know, just got to be comfortable. I'm out there riding a lot more lately, so I got to be ready to rest. It's pretty sick. Yeah, thanks. So what are you? What's going on? You guys got to talk to Farah? That'd be good. Heard you have a guest. Yeah. Yeah. Balco, this is Maggie. Maggie, this is Balco. He is the coolest nerd I've ever met. Yeah.

Balco just crosses his arms over his chest and is like, yeah. Okay. And Maggie nods and is like, I'm charmed. I'm sure. Oh, yeah. I'm also charmed. I'm sure. And he puts his hand up for like a predator style, like grasping of the hands and she grasps his hands. Like firmly. And he's like, oh, shit. And I'm like, book. This is Maggie. She's known as the spear maiden. Fuck. He turns around and he puts one hand on Big Mama and you can see him breathe really hard.

Billy closes his eyes and then took puts his hands over Billy's ear and he turns around and you can see he's like squinting his eyes trying to like stay composed. And he's like, nice to meet you. I'm Balco and I'm known as I'm known as the speed master. A bunch of the guys in the back start laughing really hard. And he turns around. He's like, shut up. Don't piss off the speed master. Keep it together, speed master. And Maggie smiles. And laughs a little bit.

And she's like, it's a pleasure to meet you, speed master Balco. I believe I have some. I believe I have a meeting to attend. I'm sure I'll see you around. He's like, yes, I'm sure that I also will see you around spear maiden by many dives on top of Big Mama and crawls into the hatch. Cool. And you guys just head into the library to meet far. Yeah, yeah, totally. Yes. Do we go to our office?

Yeah, you're actually met at the door of the motor pool by Burke, the dwarven librarian and another speaker of the silent word and they walk you to does the jester, the greeting points to his eyes, does the finger over the lips and then does an open hand to the side. Did we say that that's what the gesture was? No, he never told anyone. Does it on the fly? They both look at you like what is he doing?

But then as everybody turns away, they nod at you and they walk you very obviously under guard to far as office and she's there when you arrive and she says, ha, hello, you've returned with a guest. I see. Yes, this is this is Maggie Cole spear maiden and mender and lady who was looking for us mender. Very well, take a seat and Maggie does and I'm not doing a back and forth between two NPCs. So what are we talking about? We're just telling her what's going on.

Yeah, we're giving her the business of everything that we've discussed. I assume. Yeah. And we're going to be leaving and blah, blah, blah. There are two more boxes. We have to go to the north to find one. We accidentally tell her about Caroline. Oh, yeah. Oh, no. And she nods. She's like, I actually came to this conclusion after you'd left that that the orc that had been contracting the Magi and had been spotted around town was I can't remember the name.

She said Kareen Kareen was indeed Kareen, my old student and yes, I understand that she's now a mender. And that she has been turned against her old colleagues. And Maggie kind of leans back in her chair and crosses her arms a little bit. Betrayal. We are sitting on either side of Maggie. We shuffle our chairs away from her a little because we realize that it's like this is like two lionesses fighting. Yeah, you can tell both of them.

Look like they're at ease, but they are ready to fight like at a moment's notice. It's like a tumbleweed blows across the office and you can hear bong bong in the distance. And then Billy goes, I'll be right back. And then he leaves. I'm going to go look for Perel. Oh, yeah. Okay, good. And Maggie says to Farah turned against is maybe a bit strong. You know, people have times in their lives where they're one thing and then their values are revealed to them and they become another thing.

And Farah says becoming a Margani librarian is not a time in your life. It is a dedication that you undertake from your initiation to your dying breath. And Maggie, you know, it's a back and forth like, well, it doesn't really sound like something that someone would choose to do then, does it? And then you hear. And they both of their heads whip around and look at you popcorn and Farah puts her hands on her desk again and goes, could you two please give us a moment? Yeah, totally.

And I that's when I come back with Perel. No, no, no, leave, leave, leave all of you. What all of you, but I've just found him getting good and you are shooed out of the office. Sorry, Perel. I'm sorry. I didn't mean to like get you out of your bath. It's fine. What was going on in there? He's wearing a towel up to his armpit and a towel around his bald head. Yeah, what's going on? What's what's in there? What's is that? Oh, fuck.

And he starts like doing that thing where he's running on the spot bouncing up and down like, okay, because he's wearing a towel. It's like flapping open. Yeah. And you see he's wearing you see he's wearing full swim trunks underneath the towel with hearts on. Yeah. Oh, fuck. What's she doing here? It's fine. She knows everything. It's fine. We explain it all and she's on your side now. Kind of. Well, yeah, we're not going to leave you alone with her.

Don't worry, but she believes us that you're not the worst thing in the on the earth. And you believed her that she believed you. Yes. Yes. We believe whatever anyone tells us. No fucking shit. Perel. It's okay. The most important thing though is we have to tell you something. What? Maggie said that there's two other wizard boxes out there. And hold on. We're going to find them and we're going to see if we can get your magic back. Maybe these wizards know something.

He slumps against the wall and like and puts a hand against the wall to like steady himself before he slides down it. There are other there are other boxes. Yeah. Vincroches down and puts a hand on his shoulder. Yeah. Things might have we didn't we didn't get a lot of details, but like from what Maggie said, like I think a lot of wizards during the Exodus like after you got trapped by these have you ever heard of any other wizards getting trapped?

No, I mean, I heard of other wizards disappearing, but I didn't know. I always thought I guess stupidly that the box that was used to trap me was the only one. I mean, you remember what it looked like, right? Like it was a slapdash kind of like runes on runes equations kind of mashed in wherever they could fit pretty pretty shoddy fucking work. If you ask me, sorry, I'm stunned. Okay, so what's the plan? We're leaving. We're leaving. Okay. All right. I'll go get my stuff.

Yeah, the first one the one that we know the most about is up. It's in the frozen north, right? Yeah. Oh, the frozen north. Okay. I'll see what I can remember. Is it's at a hotspot? Yeah, they said it was like a it used to be a tower, but it's in like a glacier. Oh, what? Fuck not her who and I think that's where we're going to end it for this week. I'm your game master Sean O'Hara.

Joining me is always playing Tacoma Dome, the barbarian Abdul Aziz goodbye playing Ving the half elf druid Paul offers. Take care guys and playing fat Billy the halfling thief Jessica tie. Bye for now. Thank you to Aaron Reed for our intro and outro music. You can find Aaron on Twitter at he changes Twitter handle too frequently does it was all barf and then it was I think teen farts or something like that.

Yeah, it was teen farts and it was then he deleted Twitter and then it was gold barf and then he deleted Twitter and then I think for two days it was grandpa had a baby and fuck. What is it now? Tweets once. No, he tweets every eight to ten days nine times at one in the morning and they're always really funny. It's fuck what Twitter just hold on. Let me find it. Freddy Keurig you can find Aaron online at Twitter at Freddy Keurig like the coffee machine.

I guess for now for now and thank you to our amazing patreons supporters. From around the world. You can support us on patreon www.patreon.com slash Spout Lore or spout lord.com slash money, please where there is an absolute shit ton of bonus content. There's a whole new bonus game. There are spelt origins episodes postcards merch gift boxes a ton of stuff and thank you to all of you for listening.

We'll catch you next time and so ends the tale of adventures three who tried the best they can dumb and scared and lost they be for times of rest in revelry and though our journey may be like a conclusion we will not leave you without a resolution return next week to hear some more whilst you commute or do your chores and for you I gladly Spout Lore

Spout Lore is made possible by contributions from our listeners if you'd like to support us go to patreon.com Spout Lore okay does anyone have a request for a song spice girls spice girls it's the same vein yeah we came to town we went and saw the boat that was the clear water we saw some guys unloading food and that's when we came up with a stupid plan we dressed up as a kid and another horse better dress up as horse you could be the back end I will be the front if you want to be a disguise you have got to be you've got to be you could be two kids about that you and you met that guy greg he came down the boat gangplank and said who are you you said I'm the son of this town's mayor and he said you're not and stop lying to me then he gave you a nothing meet him at a bar then he went to the bar and he saw a centaur then you fought the centaurs in the alley and yeah but he stole the pouches full of money we also found a thing like a potion we found something else it was a diary and also ving a tom corn yep oh god this is a rap part now I gotta be really fast a guy that gave you some sauce his name is rasmus and he's really really old and greg came back and he said hey who the fuck who the fuck are you god somebody fucking help me made a storm and we're really really mad and we're gonna arrest you maggie's gonna talk to you guys over here here in the clam show at the break of dawn you guys meet the menders you gotta you gotta you gotta you gotta you gotta guys meet the menders maggie's coming down she's gonna be mad she's gonna be real mad maggie's coming down she's gonna be real mad maggie's coming down and she's gonna talk another plate of sauces please right away and bring me some more popcorn shrimp my good man all right man this these recap songs are really helping me out they're pretty good okay should we do the opening theme or go straight into it right into the theme baby okay now the round friends let me tell you a tale of three heroes noble and bold a brute a druid and a thief who is but nine years old you know them by name you know them by deed their quests are famously daring so here I sit singing to you an adventure that is worth sharing tucker's the brute he knows not his home he loves to sing and fight fingers half healthy shifts his shape and wields a spear with great pride billy's a thief his tiny size does mask the largest heart best and brightest they may not be but their friendship outweighs their smarts so gather round friends and listen close for the tale's about to start hello everybody and welcome to Spout Lore I'm your game master Sean O'Hara joining me as always playing tacoma dome the barbara barbarian abdulaziz hello everybody playing ving the half-elf druid Paul Oppers hey how are ya and playing fat billy the halfling thief jessica tie hello my friends when last we left our heroes in the city of wickport they were spying upon the vessel known as the clear water in an attempt to gain some information about their erstwhile pursuers the menders billy through the use of his magical binoculars saw that indeed menders cell leader maggie cole is in town and has taken control of some sort of menders owned warehouse and then they enacted a plan which involved tuck disguising himself as two kids in a trench coat and billy and ving each being one half of a magical horse named chauncey uh to try and trick information out of one of the menders who happened to be greg old friend dear old friend from I think episode two uh greg agreed to meet you at the clamshell pub so you went to this pub and uh in attempting to plan for an ambush were yourselves ambushed by fabio the centaur and his centaur cronies and that was the guy who he tried to sell sunstone to that first time right yes and you turned him down and he uh didn't forget okay he wanted that sunstone and instead uh was immediately faced with the reality of having to fight three fantasy adventurers and turn tail and ram upon returning to the clamshell with some stolen pouches that billy cut off one of the centaurs you rifled through a man's belongings finding his lucky coins a vial of truth serum and a diary that was gifted to him by his child you made close friends with rasmus the uh proprietor of the clamshell and asked him to seat greg at your table when he arrived for a clandestine meeting that he agreed to and upon arrival greg proceeded to explain to the three of you that you have caused a real shit show in the principalities due to your actions uh above the sea of graves and in just kind of generally ignoring the wishes of the menders in general but he agreed to bring maggie cole here at sunrise for a meeting with you and that is where we find ourselves now waiting for this sunrise meeting we have would have stayed there right like the whole night probably well I think we uh went back and got black spire oh shit to come back with us fuck black spire totally fucking forgot about it how could you because I've been drinking weak sauce like crazy and it's messing with my head so did you guys forget or did you go back and get him no we went back and got him yeah after the meeting with greg okay yeah uh rasmus our dear friend I guess now uh he let us uh host black spire up in his apartment above the clamshell he's hosting black spire behind the clamshell because black spire is an enormous dragon you know there's stairs uh yeah like we get a quick shot of you guys returning to the cave on the kelp beds that you left black spire in and the second he even hears your voices he comes charging out of the cave he's like oh my god I'm so fucking glad to see you thank you so much for being here and I'm so happy to be here with you guys I'm so happy to be here with you I hate this cave I hate this hole I like most holes don't like this one why what's going on it's just full of fish man oh my god they're so creepy they swim and they look at me with their little googly eyes I hate them well we have somewhere kind of like a hole that you could hide in but it's not fishy oh word let's go okay man and you take him you take him to a seafood restaurant you!

He gets he gets within a block and you guys have figured out you know as long as you get him to wear that saddle that covers his wings and most people don't recognize him as a dragon so he walks through town he gets a bunch of looks because they're like what the fuck is this thing yeah uh and you get him within a block of the clamshell and he lifts his big like arrowhead shaped head to the sky goes no way I can smell him where are the fish fish are uh in our tummies and in the in the oven they're not alive okay it's pretty yummy when they're dead dude I swear yummy huh it's no black crunch but it is fish crunch okay yeah wait they have like bones yeah you guys didn't tell me fish had bones dude everything has bones we have bones you have bones bones I like I like bones bones are like black crunch yeah and shrimp have shells pal yeah uh worms have shells don't like shells okay shells are like the bones of the outside oh my god I've never thought about it like that take me to these bones okay well I lead him to the to the bone yeah so I guess we we cut back to the inside of the clam shell and we know that black spire is out back just eating barrel after barrel of fish bones yeah rasmus stopped paying for trash pickup so he's going to have to pay for trash pickups seven years ago.

Oh, so he is just going nuts on these perfectly aged bones. We don't have to worry about anyone coming to find or steal Black Spire because everyone stays away from this zone. Yeah, because Rasmus stopped paying for trash pickup seven years ago. But he did have to fight off a pretty aggressive pack of seagulls just snapping at him. Get out of here. My bones. What does a seagull say? Fuck you. That was perfect. That was really good. My bones. Okay, so we cut inside and it's just before sunrise.

I like the idea that there's going to be a small background war happening between Black Spire and the seagulls of Wickport. It's like pretty loud. You can definitely hear it while we're waiting. You see him go by the window like, Get out of my back. Get out. His little club tail is swishing around. One seagull is like grabbed onto it with its little flippers and it's just like, It's like when you take a dog to the beach. Yeah, yeah.

He's walking like through a whole bunch and they're all just like sitting there really quiet, like giving that sideways glance and it's like echoing and he's like tiptoeing trying not to. I just want the bones. It's so quiet. Okay, great. So you see a line of sunlight start to course through the window at the front of the clamshell. Billy. What? Quick, do your magic stuff. Oh, yeah. Oh, right. So I think really hard, I guess. Yeah, how do you do this?

I basically just have to go deep in my memory every morning. So open every morning when I wake up, I have to wake up my memory. So I have to take off its blanket and I have to say good morning memories and then I and then I have to look through them, make sure they're all there. Whoa. Holy shit. What? And then my memories go super deep and it's like they have to zoom through down to their root zone. Okay, so yeah, roll it. 2d6 plus charisma for fairy child. Seven plus two is nine. Okay.

Okay, cool. So nine. So but you still get three. That's pretty good. Three today. Yeah. And Billy immediately spends it to change a seven to nine into a ten and gets five whole. I would like to make three wishes. My first wish is three more wishes. No, I should have put that in the room. I've been out foxed. So yeah, are you guys just like watching the door? Are you trying to be dramatic? I'm really I feel like I'm going to meet an old family member or old friend. I'm like, do I look okay?

You know, do we look okay? Yeah. Do we look tough but also kind? Yeah. Yeah. Tuck really he put a lot of gel in his beard. Okay. He's like, this is hair gel. I shouldn't have done this. So spiked. Okay. Any other thing that you guys? Want to do? Are you letting them come to you? Are you going to be like inside of the door? Billy is coloring on one of like the kid things that they give out. Yeah, well the kid drawing pads and I'm trying to make a drawing for Maggie. Oh fuck. That's cute.

Ving is communed with the spirits like in the last few hours. He got up before the dawn and went out early and on the beach in front of the the clamshell. Oh, yeah, you still. Have communion of whispers. Yeah, so I'm going to spend time and place making noise of its resident spirits and role plus wisdom and be granted a vision of significance. Cool. Okay. Okay. Yep. Two D six plus wisdom. All right, let's see it. 13 Wow. How's there's two sixes? Holy shit.

I haven't seen two sixes in a while while he was commuting with the whispers as he did. He did a meditative action. He dressed up the doll with like a linen shirt and leather. Pants. He wanted to be like present Maggie Cole with this like lovely little you know, you doll that you made of her. He didn't. I don't know. Maybe not. I made an effigy Maggie. Yeah, basically. Yeah, what are the pins for? Don't ask about the pins with these and what's a 10 plus on communion of whispers.

The vision will be clear and helpful to you.

Okay, so you attempt to reach out to the spirit world through your meditative techniques that are centuries old practiced passed down generation to generation back until the forging of the world and the thing that strikes you soonest as you attempt to reach out in that way is that when you think about the material in terms of the principalities and the spirit in terms of the storm, they feel like they are so much closer than you're used to them being like they're basically butting up against one another whereas they used to have a separation there's some sort of grinding that's taking place and a thinning and the vision that you receive is like you see a vision of the pack like the spirit of the pack and you see them move from the fantastical archetypical cosmic representation of the planes and then you see the spirit of the pack sprinting along a grassland like a true material grassland the pack from the spirit realm.

Yeah, like the spirit of the wolf pack. Oh, the wolf pack. Thank you. Yeah, so that is what you see is you see an actual vision of the spirit of the wolf pack moving from spirit realm into the material. This is all from above from the eyes of Cloudpiercer. The eyes of something who knows some kind of bird.

Yeah, you see through the eyes of Cloudpiercer he's been sailing above the principalities I suppose upon the orders of Stonebreaker King of all Thunderbirds and you you come to in the middle of the night and you realize I got a meeting sick. Yeah, anything else you guys want to do into like what is anything tuck preparing in any way Billy's drawing thing is pondering. I guess tucks just doing push up just okay.

So tuck is the first person to see them because he's in the middle of the floor doing push up and then as soon as he hears the door open he does that cat bounce off the ground. And then like lands on his feet and the first person you see is Greg and he's looking grim. He's got his hand on his knife again as he walks and he looks around sees that it's only you three here's Rasmus clanging around in the sauce zone.

Yeah, all right and he looks back behind him any nods and striding through the door full armor spear in hand shield on back. Holy shit is Maggie Cole. Wow, you look like a painting. I saw one time she doesn't respond. I drew this for you Maggie and you just run up to her. Yeah, I hand her a drawing of her boat. She looks at it for a long moment. I'm like do you want it? She reaches down and she takes it from your hand. I thought you didn't like it for a second.

Yeah, when she reaches at first like things like well he kind of gets ready in the fighting stands like what are you gonna do? Yeah, and tuck goes to read like up because he's put Terry Larry and Chad on a beam above his head. Oh, yeah, that's really cool. And then he sees that she's just takes it and then he just like stretches out. He's like bleaks are getting pretty good. Not bad. A lot of people call these side apps.

She looks she looks at the picture that Billy drew of the clear water, which I assume is the very classic like half circle looking boat. Yeah with a stick and a triangle. Yeah, a little like red hair stick figure that's like that's you yeah, and she looks at it and she looks you in the eye glowering and then she folds up the picture and she puts it in her belt. Oh, she likes it. I understand you wanted to talk. I understand you're looking for us.

I am well, maybe we can order brunch and then discuss that perhaps we can and you hear a squeak from behind you and a voice that goes drag and out and clump clump clump behind you. What wait, what did you just do? She says hey, we just made sure that your friend isn't going to be trouble for us. We said neutral ground. You brought a dragon. What what dragon he's just a dog. He's just taking a little nap. Okay, what do you mean out? What'd you do to him?

You turn and you see the figure that spoke to you removes the hood from on top their head. Hey, that's our move. I and you're looking into the face of sweet Caroline New York. Where'd you put Black Spire? He's out there. He's just taking a little nap. He'll be fine. Maggie says anyways, shall we take a seat? All right, no weapons. She puts her spear leans it up against the door like the next to the door and then tuck purposefully unflexes his biceps. She smiles at that. She smiles a little bit.

He sits down being has to his fingers up and like guns and he puts them into his pockets. Billy has his hands up in like a little kind of karate chop by stance knee put some straight down just next to yeah at his side. She sits down in a chair. She's leaning back. So why did you track us down? How did you find us? I mean the point to the boat and this is the clear water. Pretty bold of you to come find us. Well, we don't have a lot to hide. Then why'd you run?

Why'd you run all the way to McCall? Run? I gave you a task. Yeah, we did it. You know, Greg, did you not fill Maggie in? She says he oh, he filled me and I'm well aware of the situation. I'm well aware of the sequence of events. I am aware of the fact that you left Mudlark under my orders. I am aware of the fact that you arrived at the vault and you conquered the vault. You compromised my golem and you destroyed the box somehow. What? What?

Tuck's just like is is like half lidded shaking his head. I'm aware of the fact that we received reports of a wizard operating in Crystal Bay. Hold on. Can we get some more sauce? Can we get some breakfast menu, please? He goes right away. And he comes out with his arms laden in trays like when you see pictures of Cobra Fest like beer servers like he's just got the trays all the way up his arms covered in glasses of sauce and he lays them out on the table and he scurries back into the back.

Go on. I'm aware of the fact that a storm that has been as far as anyone can tell contained to the Sea of Graves for eternity was loosed upon the world and then I was I was informed of the fact that it was revealed that the torch of McCall was some sort of demon and that three individuals matching your descriptions were involved in the battle. What? Well that could be anybody. Yeah. It just could be coincidences. Mm-hmm. Could be a trick. Could be a joke, a prank played on us. The innocent ones.

You know what I heard, Maggie? I heard it all that stuff was mirrors. Oh and that's another thing. What happened to mirrors? Don't tell her. It's none of your business, Maggie. You leave him out of this. So you're telling me that the whereabouts of a 14-year-old boy that was in your companionship are now unknown. He is safe and happy and it is once again none of your business. You're aware of the fact that I am able to track people through the use of mender pins, right? Oh.

And uh, I will say that the tracking of mirrors has been a baffling experience. Well yeah, how? I am not at liberty to say. Hmm. Then, then we are not at liberty to say. Yeah, maybe all we can say is perhaps your pin tracking technology doesn't work when someone's following their dreams, Maggie. She closes her eyes and rubs the bridge of her nose. Maybe the power of self actualization fucks with your weird blood magic or whatever.

And here's the thing that I'll say to you, Maggie, and he kind of pokes her a little bit. Oh, she does not respond well to that. Is you, for all your high and mighty bullshit about, I don't like wizards, magic is dangerous, using a fucking golem, like putting your shit on a hotspot, like using Magic pins. Magic pins to track innocent fantasy adventurers. And also, like who does your hair? There's no, that's not natural. That looks amazing, so shiny, the curls. That's out of this world.

Are you finished? Yeah, you're a hypocrite, is what I'm saying. And, and clearly your pins really don't work, cause you know what, there's not even a wizard out in Crystal Bay anymore. That's all done. What do you mean anymore? Don't try and change the subject, you hypocrite. Yeah. Okay. Hypothetically, Maggie, if the wizard wasn't in the box, and he hypothetically was out in the world, he definitely lost his powers somehow, in some way. Hypothetically.

And then Tuck leans into Vang and he's like, so like, just holding nothing back, I guess. No one said, I can't say it. Maggie, Maggie puts her hands on the table and says, uh, Greg led me to believe that you had something you could offer and so far you have not told me anything that I do not know. Ask us a question. Uh, I suppose my first question is why? Why would you do this? Why would you release one of the most dangerous beings in history?

Why would you attempt to channel and leash a storm legendary for its destructive nature? And why would you release that storm and then believe, just allowing it to cause whatever devastation it would cause? Have you ever heard of family? A lot of people have made a lot of bad decisions for family. Decisions that have caused more harm than good. And I am beginning to believe that you three, are prime examples of that motivation. Maggie, we made the best decisions that we could at the time. Hmm.

You asked us to put a guy in solitary confinement for eternity. I asked you to put a weapon in safe keeping. That weapon is a person, Maggie. Look what he hath wrought. He hath wrought nothing. Yeah, this is Rasmus' joint. Yeah. And if you're talking about the storm, I mean, that was an accident. I wrought that. And everything else, the torch of McCall, that wasn't the wizard because he lost all of his powers at that point. That's other stuff. Yeah. The storm was to deal with the torch.

I feel like it would have gone way worse if Ving hadn't done that. What would have gone way worse? Well, who knows what destruction he would have wrought on the world. He was the demon of… Zealotry. Zealotry. He was gonna spread like a religious fervor across the land. Ten times worse than any storm, even a spiritual mega storm. And you're all holed up in the principalities, all comfy and cozy in your muddy houses, and you're not paying attention.

You don't see what's happening here, McCall, in other areas. I mean, McCall was in shambles when we got here. What if I were to say I don't believe you? I want proof. What proof do we have? Proof of what? Proof that what you say about the tortured McCall is true. Proof that he was some sort of demon. The rings. That's just proof that we fucked up Chamberlain. I mean… What else do we have? Yeah, but you could… I meant you could show her the memories that we went through. Oh, yeah.

Can we do that? Just show her the shit we stole from her. We could… Try that. It's a good idea. It's not a bad idea. Okay, Maggie. We have a way to show you. And it is definitely… When you see them, there is no connection to anything that you might be familiar with. We found these on our own. So, I'll give Maggie my ring. She picks it up and she looks at the glass and she goes, You're wearing them? Well, yeah, because they help us understand that dragon back there. What? Try it.

How do I know this isn't a trick? You don't. You just have to trust us. And barring that, you have to assume that we're not smart enough to trick you. You also have sweet Caroline and Greg sitting next to you and all our weapons are down. I show her my hand and put them back down again. She slides the ring on her finger. She just hears, like, Oh, sir! The Grudge! What do you show her?

I think, like, we start with the memories of the plea that Perel made in the vault where it's just, like, a guy being like, Don't leave me here. Begging not to be left in solitary confinement, basically. I think there's a moment where Bing was watching as the Torch McCall was, like, lobbing fire and was like, you guys were both in terrible, horrible trouble. It was like the end of the line. Death was on all of our doorsteps. And he summons the storm out of no other options.

Just grasps onto any power that he can find to try and save his family. Billy remembers in Lillian's Tower when we're all fighting with Pilar and Perel and that's when Perel loses his magic. And Perel just, like, dealing with that aftermath. Tuck remembers Chimes saving them and saying, you guys seem to me like a group worth saving. Um, Bing throws in, um, Billy eating so much baklava.

Just mounds of baklava around him and, um, falafel balls and all of us sitting around and just laughing and having a good time. Yeah. And across from him is Perel eating the falafel sandwiches and drinking the fancy coffee. Yeah. And then immediately we go for a walk after to the hat store where Perel's trying on mustache combos with new hats and he's asking for feathers and he's, like, putting it in just right in the hat and he's like, what do you think?

If you were to look out, you are all in this trance. Maggie's brow is starting to furrow. Billy thinks about when we were in that jail, uh, looking for Alma. We meet all the other imprisoned people who were possessed by demons. Right. Are you guys gonna share anything about the Torch of McCall? Yeah, so I go back to, like, the final confrontation with the Torch of McCall and it's like, it's Billy in the mist and flashes of the Winter War coming back in. Uh. Fire on either side. Yeah.

And, like, yeah, this, like, malevolent force being, like, I will end this world. Uh, and you come out of this trance and Maggie takes, like, a shaky breath in through her nose. Should we also show her the thing about the Dark Guard? Mm-hmm. So you come out of the trance and you go, no, no, wait, one more thing. One more thing, sorry. Yeah. And then it's, like, Farhan laying in his bed being, like, I can't remember everything, but what have you heard of the Dark Guard? Yeah.

Then you come out of the trance for the last time. Yeah. And you go, wait, one more time. And then you go in and it's just Tuck dancing. Like, do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do. We, uh, it's Billy at the bear in the chair and we're, like, and we're chanting, like, the whole bar is chanting and they're, like, chair, chair, chair. Everyone's chanting chair for some reason. And the bear is wobbling back and forth, like, rawr. Billy is, like, uh, like, poker-faced, just shoveling food after food.

Just making eye contact with the bear. Yeah, but not mean, just, like, how's it going? But in the bear's eye, you see real fear. Yeah. And we're back. And Maggie takes a shaky breath in through her nose and steadies herself and she kind of looks over her shoulder a little bit at Caroline and she nods. And she takes the ring off, puts it on the table, slides it toward Billy. I put it back on. Thank you for being honest with me. I won't say that this changes things. I…

Tuck does a what the fuck motion. She holds her hand up and she says, I want you to understand. Your actions have had consequences. Just because you have not experienced them doesn't mean that they haven't happened. Yeah, what the fuck? Greg said we destroyed the world. Greg! And she turns over and he's like, well, I was trying to just get him on the hook. She says, oh, he's so dramatic.

I will say it is not perhaps an end of the world scenario, but the storm that has been sweeping across the principalities is a real problem. There is some sort of transgression happening between the spirit world and the material in the principalities. It's not a constant thing, but you know, a massive and near mystical pack of wolves arriving in a grassland suddenly or a tree deciding to gather all trees in a forest and march on a town is of some concern to us. Understandable?

Yeah, I mean, for sure. Yeah, where you're coming from for sure. Do you think that maybe you might have some sort of responsibility in this? That's responsibility is an extreme term that we take umbrage to. Yeah, we are never responsible. Oh, I know. I am well aware. Thank you. You interrupted me for anything. Uh, she she seems almost at a loss for words. Um, if anybody wants to rule anything, you might be able to determine a little bit of how she's feeling right now. Sure.

Uh, discern realities about her emotions and thoughts. Wisdom? Wisdom? Wisdom. Uh, ten. Oh, shit. Yes. Nice. Three questions off the list. What here is not what it appears to be? Okay, yeah. So, uh, something that you have been thinking about, uh, after she like looked over at Sweet Caroline and nodded, she knew a lot of what you showed her already. She was hoping that you wouldn't lie to her about it. Oh. Hmm. So she had a lot of this information. Not all of it, but a lot of it.

And the question is how? Oh. What the fuck? Okay. Have we been telling on ourselves somehow the whole time? The pin that I had? Flashback to us, just like blah blah blah-ing to a bunch of people. Like a guy's picking his teeth with a copper pin and then… We're just talking to menders in every town. Playing scribbles and like, you won't believe what they said after that. Everyone that's ever gotten us drunk… Oh my gosh. …has been a mender. That's so funny.

Well, you won't hear but loose lips. We'll take over this town we sunk those ships. Okay, what happened here recently then? Okay. Who told her recently? Sweet. Thanks. What happened here recently? I'll give you a twofer on this one. You, Billy, your memories align in a way that is rare for you, but they all kind of you know, slap into place for a second and you connect a bunch of dots all at once. Maggie knows some stuff that you've only told some people. Like you've only told…

You've been in the library for months now. You have a lot of confidants in the library that you don't hide things from, including Farah. Farah has mentioned that an old apprentice of hers has been sighted in the town and she was going to be doing more research on that because she was worried that she was working against the library. The library…

Er, the Medjai had been contracted by an orc who was looking to get more information on you and perhaps take Ving off the board in terms of his life-shifting. And Maggie confirmed with Sweet Caroline that what you told her lined up. Was Sweet Caroline the person who contracted the Medjai? Sweet Caroline is a former librarian. And she must have gotten into the library because she knows how and she's been watching you. Oh no! Oh my! What? And Caroline has her…

You're now realizing extremely ripped arms crossed over her extremely ripped chest. Oh my god, she's the speaker of the silent word. She is indeed. Not to be fucked with. Like, Ving, actually, you recognize in her stance the way she's standing. You're like, of course, how did I not see this before? Yeah. Yeah, she's put a finger to her lips and went, shhh. Yeah, so Caroline has been spying on you. Wow. Fucking… Balls. That's shitty, Caroline. We could have been hanging out.

We thought you were attempting to destroy everything. When? When we were like all eating gumbo in the cafeteria? Yeah, during one of our many foot-long pizza subs. Bad people eat gumbo too. That's not true. You take that back, you anti-cajunist. It is the most joyful of foods. Maggie is… Oh, and I was gonna say, I was gonna give you a twofer on this one. Oh yeah. You also, Billy, are looking… The sun has come up quite a lot. So I'm squinting.

You're squinting and you kinda look out the window and you see a particular shorn-haired individual leaned up against the wall outside the clamshell. Oh my god. Shorn hair. He's got kinda jaggedy cut, like it looks like it was cut with a knife. Dark hair. Maybe a hint of elf in the ear. Fucking Dan, are you fucking kidding me? Dan? I slam my little hands on the table and I go, Dan! Traitor! Dan looks over and he waves. And I flip him off.

And he's chewing on what you think is a toothpick and you realize is a copper pin. The shot of the scene shifts to an outside shot of Dan standing there with a shit-eating grit on his face and the side, the wall caves in as Tuck, like, fucking Hulk runs through to tackle Dan. Give me a defy danger. No, you know what? You do it. I can do a defy danger. Okay, this might mean you don't get through the wall. Yeah, that would be pretty funny too. Okay, 2d6 plus strike. Shit. You got it.

Wait, yeah, I, no, I got nine. Six. Oh! I aid. Yes! Yeah, totally. Oh, yes! Okay, I will say that the aid could be as Tuck gets up to run, Ving stops Greg and Caroline from stopping Tuck. Yeah, and I'm finished. Let him see this through this. This has been coming for a long time and Tuck just barrels through the wall. Yeah, just through the like it's not even just shitty clapboard. It's like it's a wall. It's a wall and like Tuck just goes straight through the side.

There's a door right next to it just straight directly through the wall and like pins Dan to the ground and he's like you fucking asshole. He's literally everything you do sucks. Hey Tuck. What's up, buddy? What the fuck is wrong with you? Why would you do this? What do you mean? Why would I do? Why would I do what you fucking ratted us out to the menders? Why they asked me to look? I just they offered me a gig. I say yes, you know me. How long have you been a mender?

Were you a mender before we went to mudlark? Oh, I was a mender after we got to mudlark. After Maggie and them. I shouldn't be telling you this, but after Maggie and them realized y'all might be up to something, you know, when did we part ways? Sorry, you hit me so hard. I went with you to High Spear, right? Yeah, left you in high spirit. Okay. Okay. So after Maggie gave you all the task of taking the box to the place, she inducted me into the menders. Have you been following us since? Yeah.

Have you seen me? How many times have you seen me? Not a lot, right? No. Yeah, you're very good at blending into crowd. Yeah, no shit Sherlock. That's a guy that I used to know who said a lot of obvious shit and yeah, so what I'm good at it. I'm great at it for reasons. I'll never tell you. I hope you feel I was in the army. Which army doesn't matter. You hit me too hard for me to remember. I have been following you and I don't feel bad about it. So kill me. I don't care.

I'm not gonna fucking kill you man. Then let me up. Yeah, sneaky Dan. That's what you guys call me, right? No, not anymore. You are dead to me and I spit on Billy. My boot. I need to sit down. You can sit on your own stupid butt outside and I kick him. Oh Maggie. I did it wink. Ugh, wait what? What was that? Hey Maggie, what was that? Why do you wink at you all gross like that? I don't know. He's a he has been one of my most confusing assets.

He is exceptionally stealthy exceptionally good at espionage. I know it's so hard. What is his deal? I don't know. It's we thought we knew. I'm just gonna I mean, yeah, he's I don't know. He seems like a anyways. So you weren't lying to me. You weren't lying. No, I appreciate that and now I just suppose I want to know some things. Billy has one more question. Oh, you do. I gave you so much information. I know it's pretty awesome. I want to know Maggie. What do you want most?

Just a way out of this away out of this storm business away to just make things the way they used to be safe. I'm gonna be honest. I'm scared and there was a long time where I was afraid of the U3 and I'm afraid of what you're capable of and I'm afraid of what Perel I suppose was capable of and I don't know what to do. I think you're also afraid that it was some how your fault. It is my fault if I didn't give the box to you three none of this would have happened. No, that's not true.

It was already happening. Yeah, Perel didn't actually make any of this happen. She like looks up as she's still, you know, her brain is still shuffling through the deck of cards that you gave her. Yeah, she's trying to make sense of it. Yeah, like the Perel's like negative aspect went into the waters, but it wasn't causing the floods. It was coming after us to get Perel's body back like the floods were something else. No.

And the torture McCall was coming to the principalities to like spread his influence. So you're telling me after a year of thinking that the three of you were the cause of this problem that you might be the solution to it. Well, solution is a very strong word that we take umbrage to. We do not solution anything. We're kind of just around for a lot of stuff. Like you think that we're cogs in the machine. We're more just spokes in a wheel.

Yeah, or like tape that you might put over a leak or like while you like get the supplies that you need to like actually fix it. A garbage bag in the window of your cart. Just a garbage bag blowing around in the wind. Just showing you how much beauty there is in the world. You know what Maggie? You're not the only one who's trying to be anything other than what you've been trying to be lately. We've been trying to be that too. I just I don't think I know what to do anymore.

Hey welcome to the another round of popcorn shrimp with hollandaise sauce. I'm comfortable doing a little bit of a time jump as she's as you guys just kind of hang and talk for a bit more. Yeah, I think we're like this conversation is like us sorting through sequences of events basically. Okay, so the morning continues as you all explain what you've done since you left and the research that we've been doing. Yeah, like trying to figure out. Oh, you're just giving it up. I'd at this point.

Why why not? Yeah, the only person who's not on our team is Dan. Yeah, Dan is outside still Dan dead to us to clot. Yeah, Dan is outside, but he is taking a concussion nap, which is not a great idea. We should not have let him do that Caroline goes outside and wakes him up and brings him back inside. No get that guy fucking out of here. Caroline might die if I leave him out there. Don't just take him somewhere else. He literally ruins everything. I'm going to take him back to the boat.

Don't yell at me. Okay, fuck you're not the fuck you know she points in your face. You spied on me careful and she leaves. I'm sorry and she leaves with dead. She goes back to the clear water, but you just explain to Maggie kind of what's going on and your research.

There's just like soft music playing like piles of hollandaise and shrimp are just coming to the camera circles around the table as you guys emphatically talk to her showing her is like a little sprout of a tree of wisdom and like describing all Billy's doing little little illusions.

Oh, yeah out scenes and then tuck is trying to do the same thing, but he's doing crude drawing and then it there's like a picture of him and Ruby and then underneath it says sex happen during that Billy covered his eyes for that part of the story I blinders. Yeah, I but not ears. Yeah, yeah, I couldn't look I had to choose one. So you chose not looking at the stick drug Jessica did one eye in one year.

Yeah, the the meal transitions from like breakfast to lunch very obviously point things got to bake potatoes on the bottoms of forks and they're dancing. He's like like this it was like this just like Benny and June. And tuck wheels in a giant whiteboard and he draws a huge circle on it and then he indicates the middle and then he writes the middle of the thing slash the top of the middle and then there's an asterisk and then at the bottom of it says except for bagels and doughnuts.

There's a lamp in the corner that being takes the shade off and it's his spear. He's like pointing to different because he hit his weapon there as a lamp to go weird. Hell yeah, yeah, and she had that like, you know, at some point during this montage, she takes off her armor and Greg packs it away and takes it away. So now she's just in her like civilian clothes. Yeah, she ties her hair up in a big red bun that sits on the top of her head cool.

So cool Billy's a little jealous and he wants to do the same thing. So he's also trying to like push all his hair up in a bun. He puts a bun on the top of his head to roll a dinner roll. We cut away from that montage to a Billy montage inside of the montage where he's doing his hair and it's going. So we're going to do the same thing. So we're going to do the same thing. So we're going to do the same thing. We're going to do the same thing. So we're going to do the same thing.

And something actually that you guys do notice is since you've seen Maggie last her hair has a lot more gray in it than it used to. She's like a middle school teacher that got assigned to the bad class. She's had a she's had a bad year and yeah, at the end of you explaining it's now early afternoon and I want to kind of want to talk to you guys about it because she doesn't know what to do. This is kind of like like a dog chasing a car. I don't know what I do if I ever caught one.

She was like right. She was gunning for you and now she's like shit. They're the only thing she knew like the only things the she thought she had control over was I just have to find them. I just have to find them and like during this this whole morning. She's not been like jovial having a great time. She's been very troubled and she's just she feels listless now.

So she doesn't really know what to do because if you can't fix the principalities like she hoped you somehow could then what does she do? Well, what do you know that we don't know yet because we tried to figure this shit out and it's hard and there's so many pieces of it and it all is really just like crunching in my brain all the time.

It's crunching up against each other and it's so hard to make it all fit and I just want it to fit and so tell me give me my pieces so it'll fit more pieces shit. Okay, let me think that's an appropriate question ask right guys. Yeah. Yeah, what do you know that we don't know? I thought that that was a dual asking shot. Uh-huh. Uh-huh. And now I'm like, what do I know that you don't know?

Well, I mean the things the parts that were missing how to get perl is magic back the druid stuff the book that from why it seems like the walls of the worlds are falling apart and shits moving across the dark guard because it's not just the spirit stuff. It's fucking demons are coming through too. Yeah. All right. Okay. All right. Yeah, I can feel some of this in a suppose we have access of course to a lot of caches of information across the principalities.

I haven't really explained to you a lot of the structure of the have I literally not even once. No. Okay. Well, we're kind of like it's kind of like a decentralized sort of system. So not every other mender knows the identity of every other mender. I'm a little bit higher up.

I leave my own cell and I know a few other leaders of other cells, but Caroline Greg Mears definitely Dan don't really know anything outside of their cell, but I've been in contact with some of my colleagues and I've been doing some research and from what we can tell the lack of magic in the world is what kind of started this whole thing with the box and all that whatever the payments were breaking down on the prison and we are now thinking especially now that the storm has been sweeping across the lands and spirit creatures have been crossing over to the material that that lack of magic is also causing the realms, spheres, planes to butt up against each other.

So if that's happening with the spirit realm, it stands to reason that it's happening with the demons as well. Wait, are the fairies coming through too then, Billy? You know, that would make sense. That's why I could probably move into it so easily in the tower. And I've been seeing them so much more. Yeah, you have been. I've been talking to so many shoes. I haven't talked to a shoe for years before that. This spoon. This spoon. He doesn't like being held there. I'm sorry. Billy's a fairy?

Oh yeah, put the ring back on. Put the ring on. Take the ring off. Wow. Caroline didn't tell me that for some reason. Yeah. Did she know? I mean, we don't talk about it that often. I was doing a lot of fairy stuff in the library. Oh, right. Interesting. I'm gonna have to talk to her about that. What else do I know? So that is a potential, that might be a challenge outside the scope of our operation. Kind of fits in if there's a vacuum in the world from the lack of magic.

Yeah, I mean, it's causing an imbalance in stuff everywhere else, and we're trying to just bring a little bit of magic back. Yeah. If the lack of magic is what's causing all this, would bringing all the wizards back fix it? If we could just have what they produced without the individuals, we'd be golden. But it is the individuals, it's ego, it's ambition, it's greed. That's what caused the problems. People. It's the people. But there's always gonna be people.

Not everybody can rewrite reality on a fundamental level at will. Can I… I feel like I want to Spout Lore about this. Yeah, totally. Would this be a time to use the sounding board move to help his Spout Lore? What is it again? I forget how to use it. Dude, I don't know. Yeah. If someone comes to you and just needs to bounce an idea off of you. That's kind of what it was. Is it? Yeah. They get plus two forward when Spout Lore advice. Yeah, so I think that's what it is.

Is that if you come to Ving and you talk to Ving about a thing you're thinking about, you would get a plus two on your Spout Lore. Okay. Maybe you two go outside to check on Black Spire and you talk to Ving about it. Yeah. Like, you seem upset. Let's go take some air. Oh. Fucking fine. And then Tuck like tosses a tray of shrimp at Billy and he's like, can you finish that for me? I'm not hungry anymore. No problem. And we cut out back. You find Black Spire still asleep.

It's been hours and he is still dead asleep next to a pile of shattered barrels. Did he shatter those? I mean, there's no way to tell. He's asleep. Hmm. Yeah. I just I feel like there's no like given everything that Perel told us about wizards, it still feels like the story is one sided. And trying to bring back their magic without them feels like it'll cause more problems. Well, I don't think that it can be done. Yeah, cause Perel told us that magic seeks out a consciousness.

Like it either they're born a wizard, so it latches onto them when they're like little like whatever they are before their babies. Becoming. Yeah, or it gets them later. At a very delicate time in their life. Or it can't find someone and then it just turns into a person. You can't have one without a person. You need a mind. So wizards are magic. Magic is the wizard too. Yeah. Roll. Okay. 2d6 plus intelligence plus your plus two from talking to Ving. Ten. Okay. Something interesting and useful.

So I've all but told you guys kind of what a wizard is, right? Well, kind of. Tell us again, but in very clear terms. As if we're stupid people. We are three years old. Yeah. So basically what it is, is the material plane is a confluence of the spheres. Like I've tried to explain this via like if you had all of the stuff that made bread falling into a sieve, eventually underneath the sieve would be bread dough. That's a worse way to explain it.

I think I was trying to find a way to describe it in like real terms, but it's the material plane, the place that we live. It's a tide pool. Okay. Material plane is a tide pool. Go back to the bread. Back to the bread. But if you think about like the ocean as like the the outer dark it washes in and it leaves water in the pool. Yeah.

Eventually if you think about like crabs and shit as the spirit realm, they come in here and eventually it's like its own thing, but it is a confluence of many other things. The bread. The bread. Let's go back to the bread again. Okay. Back to the bread. But okay. So the realms are being, they were being kept separate by a field that was created by the presence of wizards. In the material plane. In the material plane. They are in the material for whatever reason.

That I can't just give you that information because I don't really, it's like why do fucking stars act the way they do? You know what I mean? It's like magic is like the keystone in the bridge of the universe. Like you know how like you have the middle stone that keeps everything else up. So like all the other planes like pushing in on each other, they like form this central like mush like dough that Jessica just nodded like uh huh. I am really stupid.

So it's like one of this like this spirit world is flour and then over here you've got yeast and that's the fairy realm and then over here you've got uh water and then that's the spiritual realm and then all of those things like like congeal together and then they make the dough of bread that is the material realm. Then that starts to rise and it pushes all the realms apart from one another and the act of rising is the magic. Hmm. Magic is the meniscus.

If you're missing one of them then it doesn't turn out properly. Yeah, exactly. And if you're missing magic then they all kind of like collapse. Collapse like a bridge like a keystone of like the keystone of a bridge. Back to the bread. Back to the bread. The bread was working. Yeah. But like I do imagine like the keystone of a bridge like once you take that out everything starts to collapse towards one another.

And in the meantime before the collapse there's tension so that would be like wars and stuff. Totally. Yeah. It's like a tectonic plate. It's like very unstable. Hmm. And so Yeah. So when they start falling on each other they just fall into each other and throughout. Yeah. And that is probably what's happening in the principalities and will probably start happening in other places eventually. Hmm. But the storm might be pushing it along in the principalities.

And this kind of makes sense because the principalities always felt like it was closer to the spiritual realm because that's mostly where druids are. And like McCall feels like it's closer to the iconic realm because that's where giants used to live. Hmm. So it is attached to individuals. The magic is attached to people too. Yeah. The spirit is attached to the druids. Yeah. Like it can't be a little bit of that. Yeah. Hmm. Yeah. So does that make sense? Yeah. Yeah. Totally.

And in that way the idea of the wizard and this is not necessarily a satisfying answer was an accident. Like wizards are just the physical embodiment of that force and they're able to work it the way they want to work it. It's an emergent property. It was a huge it's like consciousness in the brain. Yeah. Exactly. It's just kind of a like it's a necessity of existence but they just also happen to be sentient beings. Well yeah that much like power it kind of congeals into an alive thing. Yeah.

Exactly. I always thought about them as crystals. Yeah. Like they crystallize within magic and that's what the wizard is. And in this in this in the material plane in this timeline in this cycle like if this kind of stuff happens other places at other times you know if this is the only material realm there was something that eventually tipped the individuals where it just the tension became too much and people tipped that first domino and it became this huge unraveling thing.

So what is the useful actionable information there? May's not stupid. So what if we just tell her this? What if we're just like look we talked about it and this is what we think it is. Like this is what magic is this is how it works. She can be part of this conversation too. Yeah.

Oh it's the kind of it's like that Canadian history thing where some politicians at a hotel were having a midnight snack and started talking about an issue and then they started waking up other politicians and they all met in the kitchen. Totally yeah. Yeah it's like Ving and Tuck are talking about this and they're like we should fucking get Maggie we should get her out here and then Billy comes out and Greg is like I have nothing to contribute but I want to see your dragon. Yeah. It's so cute.

Are they all this cute? Yes. Are they? Yes. You've seen more than one dragon. Ving shows him the mother of pearl scale. Turns out Greg has been obsessed with dragons since he was a little kid. He lifts up his shirt and then turns around and there's like a back plate of like the biggest tattoo of a dragon you've ever seen. It's like the airbrushing on the side of a van from the 80s. Totally.

And yeah so you tell Maggie all this and she's involved in this conversation as well and it's like ah well I don't know about y'all but it kind of sounds like the answer is there is no solution and that we are doomed. What if we got the wizards back? What if we got the wizards? How? We're not going to get all the wizards back. That's impossible. We're just saying some of the wizardry. Yeah and we know that not all of them were on board with the fucking Exodus.

And we know there's two around that are trying to bring magic back. Hmm hmm. Okay. I have some information. You remember the box of course. The box that I gave you that you all decided to destroy secretly. Hmm hmm. 100%. Kind of over it. Not really. That is not the only box. Oh fuck. How many do you have? Last I heard the menders were that I'm aware of, the cells I'm aware of, are in possession of two additional boxes. And that's where we're going to end it for this week.

I'm your Game Master Sean O'Hara. Joining me as always playing Tacoma Dome the Barbarian Abdulaziz. So long. Playing Ving the Half Elf Druid Paul Oppers. Take care. And playing Vat Billy the Halfling Thief Jessica Tai. Bye everyone. Thank you as always to Aaron Reid for the intro and outro music that we listen to every time we record. It's just amazing. And thank you to our Patreon supporters around the world. We love and adore you if you would like to Patreon support us.

You can find us at patreon.com slash speltlore where there is hours upon hours of additional bonus content including our Blades in the Dark slash World of Blade game. Speltmore Mall Brats. There is monthly streams. There is postcards and the speltlore almanac and an absolute ton of shit. So check that out. And if you want to find us online we're at speltlore most places. See you next time. And so ends the tale of adventures three who tried the best they can.

Though dumb and scared and lost they be. For time's abreast in revelry. And though our journey may be light. We will find a conclusion. We will not leave you without a resolution. Return next week to hear some more whilst you commute or do your chores. And for you I gladly speltlore.

Are you playing the song right now? Yep. Here we go. Get ready. Wait, what did you want? I just wanted a quick recap on the episode. Okay, here. Yeah. I'll do it in the form of a song. Yeah! Never stop. We went to the shop. Then we put our dragon in a hole. And then we go back to him. Don't stop. Never give up. Don't get high and reach the top. And we'll see what you give up. Don't get high and reach the top. You started coming down the road. You met some people on the way.

Just pass Coconut Joe. And then you went to an inn with an orc who asked for a reenactment of a lust and love. Choose your own adventure. Yeah. Thanks. Got awkward. Yeah, it's true. We didn't know what to do. Cause lust ends. And love is mostly hot dog themed pornography. And there was a lot of stuff about ketchup and mustard. I don't know how we got into that point where that's what it is. I thought that it was just a book. And now that's just a hot dog book. One joke that worked well.

One joke that worked well. One joke that worked well. Turned it into a meme. Got to that town where… Yep. When Black Spire needed somewhere else to hide. We found a cave on the port town and he went inside. And he was like, are you coming back? And we're like, of course. We told him not to kill anybody if they came into the game. Just act like you. After that, then you went to the market and bought some stuff. Tried to sell Sunstone to a guy. Then you decided. Not to. Yeah.

Went across the street to another little old lady who you sold it to. Then you went to spend your money right away. And now you don't have any money. We still have like 190 coins. So that's not that bad. But I didn't spend 200 coins. Trying to figure out if Allison is in town. Turns out Allison is in town or not. That's not true. Nobody said that. He said that the scarf belonged to a woman. And that's all you know. That is pretty good that I know this woman. Woman scarf is good for me.

I like woman scarf. I had red hair for sure. And probably wearing a red dress. It was for sure Allison. There's no way she wasn't. And also, Bing bought a haunted doll. Really tried to… Get him not to buy that haunted doll. Sometimes dolls buy you in. That's what I feel happened here. I don't think that we will part. Me and doll are one. Then you bought some leaves. Went to a place and bought more leaves. Then you bought liquid for the leaves. And bought a bunch of leaves. Then you saw a boat.

Went to the docks and saw the boat. That you were looking for the boat. Clear water was the boat. Clear water was the boat. Boat. Boat. Boat. Boat. Boat. Boat. Boat. Boat. Boat. Boat. Boat. Boat. Boat. Boat. Boat. Boat. Boat. Boat. Boat. Boat. Boat. Boat. Boat. Boat. Boat. Boat. Boat. Boat. Boat. Boat. Boat. Boat. Boat. Boat. Boat. Boat. Boat. Boat. Boat. Boat. Boat. Boat. Boat. Boat. Boat. Boat. Boat. Boat. Boat. Boat. Boat. Boat. Boat. Boat. Boat. Boat. Boat. Boat. Boat. Boat. Boat. Boat.

Boat. Boat. Boat. Boat. Boat. Boat. Boat. Boat. Boat. Boat. Boat.

Boat and poisons and half weed half weed yep and then the last thing that we did was spotted in the harbor the clear water holy shit oh fuck and that is where we find our heroes now the harbor is bustling you're basically standing in the middle of a two-way river of people that are breaking around you how the fuck did they get it out of the mud I wonder if the Wittershins and like with the changing of the waterways have got come back and it's floating again one of all the ships are up well remember uh oh wait no it was the halfling lands that flooded yes the halfling lands have been flooding but if the halfling lands flooded maybe there's more floods so I don't know yeah yeah we you have no literally no idea what is happening in the prince of pretty sure it's probably that flood probably must be this one regional flood that brought this boat back to life either way it brought somebody who hates us here nice so yeah what what what what what what what what what what!<|tr|> what sorry yeah she's uh she's got a real practical like seafaring outfit on like she's got you know linen shirt leather jerkin like the whole uh thing she's looking around ordering people around holy shit yeah so yeah maggie's here wow uh and she's within sight of you guys so you might be inside of her oh shit what let's duck we just duck is there a bench yeah there's a bench in front of you yeah tuck ducks behind this regular size bench honestly you're probably invisible now so you have two more questions what should I be on the lookout for I would say this is not something that you see but something you think about is if maggie's here it stands to reason that other members of the menders that you have met are probably here too mirrors well no mirrors is in the in unfortunately uh but there might be other people that have met you personally that are on the lookout for you.

Oh, right. Like Greg. Or Gary. Fuck, I can never remember that guy's name. It started as Gary and then you said Greg and I started saying Greg. Okay. So also what here is useful or valuable to me? So you are watching the people that are milling about on the deck and coming down the gangplank and they're moving boxes off the ship and walking them down the boardwalk to a specific warehouse. What's the warehouse look like? It's, oh my god. It's based on a principality's style that everybody hates.

No, it's weird. They are all quite boxy in their shape, but they're stacked on top of each other in an irregular way. So it kind of ends up being this like sandcastle kind of Lego brick looking structure. Like an Olympic village. Yeah, exactly. Yeah, kind of like the Olympic village. There's a place that's called like Habitat 514 or something that's like an apartment complex that I'm thinking about, but it looks like this very strange stacked boxes kind of structure.

And you can see Billy the warehouse that they're moving boxes into. You know which one it is. It's like closest to the water. Yeah, furthest away from you, but closest to the water. So you see where they're loading all their shit. Wow. What do the boxes look like? It looks like food supplies. It looks like so this is what is useful or valuable. They plan on being here for a while. Oh, setting up camp. I see.

Yeah, Billy, you're watching the boxes and you're like, well, I could eat that stuff in like two weeks, which means they're probably going to be here for six months. Yeah, so that and that is what you gather from that discern realities. All right. So maybe we should try and figure out our approach here. What do you think she wants from us? What do we know about what she knows about us? Well, we know that we definitely delivered something to the vault, which is what she wanted out of us. Yes.

Yeah. Does she know that it wasn't what she wanted? I don't know. We don't know that yet. I guess we will know if she sees us and if she is angry looking or not. What if we show her a picture of us or a likeness of us first? Oh, that's actually not a bad plan. If we like let her know that somebody like us is nearby, but it's not our personhood. Yeah, if we find three mooks that look kind of like us, and then there's all these people walking around. Nobody nobody looks.

There's no way to find people who look just like I'm going to say you could maybe find a half link and that's you have to find six McCollins and strap them together. Look close to touch a forest garbage. Yeah. Okay. Unless like you guys want to do a disguise. Yeah, I like disguise. Mm-hmm. Because disguise we can disguise ourselves and then she won't know that it's us. What if we disguise ourselves to look like people who would look like us but isn't us puts on his glasses.

Wait, Billy, you can make illusions. Oh, can you lose us? Can I? Yeah. Yeah, you would be able to you haven't rolled your fairy child. So you'd have to roll that to determine how many hold you have guess. Great. And then you could create a convincing illusion, which would just change your appearance. At the beginning of the day roll plus charisma, which I have to seven plus two is nine. That means I get three holds today. Okay. Wait, can we help if you can pitch me a way that you could help?

We put him in a fairy child sort of state put like make him really at ease with some wonderful elemental like nice little cool breeze for a hot little billow. Yeah. And you can hum him his favorite tune. Yeah. And I put like a zinc based sunscreen on his rosacea. That's so nice. He's taking your his little ball of fur and shaped it into the cat with the multiple tails. It's like a little like I have a little cat, a little tiny kitty. Yeah. All right. I mean, this just feels nice.

And then I give I like return to them from the crowd and I hand Billy a pizza. Is it my birthday? Okay. Somebody roll 2d6 plus bond six. I failed. Wait, can I ate him? Yes, I always say yes to the aiding and aid. How are you aiding thing? Aiding Billy? I just give him a pizza code. Okay, I give him a pizza cone and a kiss on the cheek. Okay, 2d6 plus bond plus kiss. So many fans waited with bated breath for the end of that. Yeah, kiss on the cake. Fuck eight.

All right, so that makes six to seven and that makes Billy's nine to ten. Wow. Wow. The people who love rules hate this. Welcome to Spout Lore fuckers. That means I have five holds today. So get ready for magic. You should waste two of them right now. Definitely. Very convincing illusion and Maggie goes, what's that? The fireworks billion gang. It's just a picture of the three of you like crude drawings. We're right here. Um, okay.

So are you doing this illusory stuff like here or are you going somewhere else? Because you're just literally in a thoroughfare surrounded by people right now. Maybe that's how I waste ones. I start doing it now. Can I waste one? You can waste one again. I would like to hear how though. Okay, so I start creating a convincing illusion because I'm so emotional about all the support I've received all the water and the blowing of the air and the pizza cone.

I'm so overwhelmed and I am transported to like a really good place, which is I don't know, like a northern ocean. I'm like, yeah, I can make us. I can make my family and I start doing it right there. And there's just like copies of you. Yeah, it's like halfway and then tuck in Ving to tell me to stop. Yeah, we smack the spirit magic out of his hands. Billy, no, not here. There's people everywhere. I'm sorry. More of us. We're more. He is now.

They're just three pairs of legs standing in front of you that are like run. Everybody run. Everybody run. I don't know how to undo it. So three pairs of legs run off the crowd. That's going to come back to haunt us at some point. So you guys what drag Billy away to a more quiet zone so you can actually do a good illusion disguise. Yeah. Is there what's around us? Is there any quiet alleys? Yeah, this is like we so Wickport like I said is a pretty big place. Actually, because it's a Toria.

Maybe it's kind of more like a it's like a downtown Vancouver. So lots of buildings, lots of people, lots of alleys and yeah, you can definitely just find like an alley off a main sort of restaurant row. Oh, no. Actually, you find an alley off a place called Chandler's Row, which is where all of the candle makers in the city operate. Oh, cool. It's just like rows and rows and racks of like candles hanging off like the different kind of stacks to dry. Oh, yeah.

And you just find a quiet alley off that. Okay. Yeah, we huddle behind a dumpster that's full of beeswax smells so good. Oh, yeah. Chandler's Row smells amazing. Yeah. Yeah, I'm gonna take some of the beeswax really and it feels like it you're being you're kind of like why did they throw this away? This is such high quality beeswax. I feel like I'm missing something, but I'll take it. No, I mean it's probably just like a weird bee, right? Like it's not just a honeybee. It's a firebee.

Yeah, it could be firebee wax. That would make sense that you would make candles out of firebee wax. Yeah, because it burns for an extra long time. So it's and it's still kind of warm to the touch. Yeah, which is why I can pour it in Jerry, which was why I can pour it in a jar dipped a little too far into the Canada there. All right. So how's this disguise gonna work? Are you making illusions that like go over yourselves? Is that the plan? That's what I thought. That's pretty cool.

Okay, you're disguising us as other things. Can you make me into like a really tall like dark hair? Maybe no hair with like a big beard like a broad chested big boy. No, that's me. I'll do my best. Okay, maybe can I we could be like a like fancier versions. Sure. Or a kid gang. Yeah, I don't think we can make me look like a kid. Yeah. Yeah. I mean illusion. He would Billy would just be making like your top half invisible Oh, and then making your bottom half an illusion. Okay. No, no, no.

Make us look like kid gangs that are really fancy kid gang. Okay, can you make me a horse a horse? I just I haven't been an animal for a long time. I miss it. Just make me some sort of animal. Okay, can you make me white? I can do my very best. I just got to know what it feels like. I've been hearing great things. So I'm like doing my best like you guys keep changing your mind. I'm like totally. So I make talk into a kid gang.

So what I do is the bottom half of him is like a kid and then the top half is another kid on his shoulders. Amazing and they're wearing cumber buns and like a long one long robe. Yeah, and then I hold on to the back of being and then we become a horse together. Yeah. A cumber bun on your neck horses wearing a bow tie a bow tie and a cumber bun. Yeah. Thank you. You're welcome. Wow.

This is the perfect disguise because it's you think that the disguise is the kids disguising themselves as a person wearing a cloak. Yeah, disguise is the person disguising themselves as the two kids. It's a double bluff. It's perfect. Okay, cool. So now we've got a weird kind of tottering kid tower in a cloak and a horse walking. Sideways and a horse walking sideways wearing a cumber bun like a bow tie.

Okay, so there's a horse like Fred Astaire side stepping down the road wearing fancy clothes like dancing in the rain and the three of you are like these are the perfect disguise so it gets pick you we demand so much authority because everybody's like this with their arms and chest out. Yeah, I'm at command authority demand. Authority give us the authority right now put the authority in the bag. Nobody gets hurt. Okay, perfect. These are your disguises.

You emerge back into Chandler's row the way my friend. Yeah, I grab the bridle of the horse, which is one of things flaps. Yeah, and I go come along Chauncey Chauncey. Yeah, come along Chauncey mummy would be so ever so mad at us if we are later than six lunch Chauncey. Okay. Yeah, we go. There's just like a there's like a there's like a 12 year old kid just like dipping candles in wax watching this happen. Hello poor boy. This is my horse. Hi Chauncey. Okay.

Is this the top kid or the bottom kid saying this? But they talking to you this? Oh my God weird. I like that. Do you guys need any candles candles? What a pedestrian form of entertainment payment? What come Chauncey don't allow this poor boy to get any of his waxy hands all over your gleaming gold hooves God damn you guys have to make trotting sound. Oh, sorry. Clop clop clop clop clop clop clop clop. Hey I mean give me some. And now I as the GM am forced to ask what's the next step here?

I thought we were going to the warehouse. Yeah, obviously. Okay, but of course you're going to the warehouse that the vendors were loading their shit into. Yeah, I just had to get in character. Okay, because our dad works there. Yeah owns it. Oh, hmm interesting ploy because he's fancy. Yeah, for sure. Yeah. Okay, so you go back to the that boardwalk area where you know, like the entryway to that section of the harbor is and people are getting out of your way.

Yeah, some people are giving you a bunch of looks of course because you look like two kids in a trench coat leading a tap dancing horse. Down the road. Good day thing. The horse's ass says the tail. I do. I just realized like physically that the horse is Ving walking and Billy on the ground walking behind him, but the lattice work of the illusion connects them up above his head. Yeah, fuck so confused. I know sometimes people pass between them and they're just like what the fuck?

I'm like walking through a ghost walk through a horse's ghost. So you get to the harbor and yeah, nobody stops you as you walk into the harbor, but you pass like the harbor master shed and an old man with like a big curly gray wig like sticks his head out as you walk by and just watch as you pass. Don't you dare you poor piece of shit. He reaches out and closes the shutters on his shed as I thought and you walk down the boardwalk and you're just approaching the warehouse. That's your plan. Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah. Okay. What do we see at the start of the warehouse? Should we discern realities as we get close? Yeah, you can discern realities. What do your horse eyes see? You're not nice seven. Hell yeah. All right. So one question from the discern realities list. What's useful or valuable here for us? Yeah. So something that you notice as you are walking along the boardwalk, you're kind of getting you're side-eyed by the stevedores that are like hauling these boxes around.

They're like get the fuck out of the way like I'm working and as you're approaching you're like, ah yes, our plan to tell them that my dad owns this warehouse. You get close to the door of the warehouse and you see stuck in the the jam the door jam on the outside. You see stuck into the wood a copper needle. Oh shit. They own the warehouse and they're not our dad. So that move, you know is not going to work and also this is a mender's asset basically like be aware. Okay. Should we huddle? Yeah.

Okay. The horse folds in around the two boys. Yeah. All right. What should we do? I mean, should we look for documents or see how where they're staying because this is just where the boat staying we should find out where they're staying. Maybe we should should we pretend? We're lost like we think this is our warehouse. Okay.

What if we tell them that it's like our dad is the mayor and he wants to extend his gratitude for the clear water or such a historic ship arriving at the shores of the Wickport. Yeah. He sent us because we're part of the tourism group. Of Wickport. Maybe. Yeah. And we need we need to like we brought this horse to escort you to your abode abode. Yeah. Yeah, the carrier load to your abode. Yeah. We're abode loaders. All right. So that's your plan. I think so.

And you just see a stream of people walking back and forth. It looks like they're coming close to like finishing unloading because there's fewer and fewer people. But you hear like, oh, yeah. Okay. Just bring it. Bring it over that way. And yeah. Okay. We'll do it. And coming up over the edge of the boat is Greg Foulsmith. No, not Greg Foulsmith. I can't remember what his actual last name is. He went by mud muggins. Yeah. The first mender that you ever met.

This is the guy that tried to stop Billy from stealing the potato wedges. Oh, him. Yeah. Greg. Yeah. Like episode two. Yes. Yeah. And he is like, hey, can I help you? Uh, yes. My father is the mayor of this town of Whitport. And we wanted to thank you for gracing this town with the historic ship that is the Clearwater. And we would like to extend our deepest hospitalities to the organization that you represent.

And by that, I mean we have dressed up this horse to escort you to your abode, as is the custom of Whitport. Uh, Greg snorts, spits onto the wood, and goes, you two kids in a trench coat? Yes. Well, you can tell your daddy that if he wants to talk to us, he can come down here himself. Oh, um, okay. Uh, the horse is a great dad. If perhaps our father sent us in this trench coat because he is busy right now, maybe he can find you at your hotel. Uh, where might that be? He holds up a hand.

How about this? How about you turn around and you get out of here and you don't come back? Can I convince him to tell me in any way where they're staying? I guess you can convince him. You can try and trick him into revealing something, but he is not going to willingly tell you anything. Although Billy has further fairy hold, fairy child hold. I do. Oh, yes. Oh, yeah, you can make him a friend. I'm gonna charm an individual for a short while. Oh, smart. Great. Okay. Okay.

So, yeah, Billy sees us going south, and he's like, what do I do? I already clopped a bunch of times. Uh, yeah, so Billy's just like, uh, uh, flicks his arm up to charm him, and it just looks like the horse… The horse's tail let out, like, a little fart, and Billy is like, oh, shit. That's what it sounds like. He farts magic at him. He farts, and then the horse's butt says, shit. So, he's like, oh, god. Yeah, I'm blowing at him, like, So it's just Billy's breath that's bothering him? Yeah.

I ate so much cheese earlier. But you haven't been brushing at night, have you? No, I haven't. God awful. And he seems proud of his fact. Yeah, why would I brush off the cheese? That's free cheese. But I could just eat it later. Oh, so many times we've seen Billy scraping the fuzz off his teeth and licking his fingers. Oh, man. That's disgusting, Billy. And Tech leans into the front half of Chauncey and is like, he really gotta do a better job with his hygiene. We have to start trying.

And, Billy, you see the telltale, signs of your magic taking hold, the softening of the features. He's still like, the fuck's going on here, but he's not actively telling you to fuck off anymore. He's like, what's the deal here? We're gonna help him. We're gonna help him with what? We're gonna carry some of his load. Look, are you talking to that horse? No, no. You're standing right in front of me and you're talking to the horse and I can hear the horse talking back.

I'm not talking to the horse. I was just trying to do something good for once. Don't cry. My father said there is an important organization coming into town and I've fucked everything up today. Stop. Stop. Stop. Stop. Stop. We both know that your daddy is not the mayor. My daddy's the mayor. Cut it out. Okay. I've met enough kids in trench coats to know when someone's trying to pull a fast one on me. Alright. So what's the deal? What's going on? Honestly. Cut the tears. I know they're fake.

It's Derry. I'm trying to help you out here, kid, but my patience is wearing mighty thin. Staring daggers at Tuck like, this will not last long. I can't keep holding it. The horse is going like this, like putting poop across his throat. He hates you so much. Even my magic kid. Yeah. Billy is sweating so much. Just do it. Just get it over with. Alright. Alright. Alright. I'm a member of the Urchins and our gang, the Nutcrackers.

We wanted to extend our hospitality and try and use a connection with you to gain leverage in the city's underworld. And they sent me because I was the best at coming up with disguises and plans, but it seems like it's not the case. See? That's all you had to say. I'm sorry. It's fine. I understand. Look, I was a little ragamuffin at one point in my life, too. And it takes a little bit to get used to this life of crime and espionage and duplicity. And I'm sorry. But thank you for coming clean.

And I understand. I don't know how you heard about us, for one. That's a little concerning, but also a little impressive. So how about this? How about you meet me later tonight at the Clamshell Pub and I'll see if I can help y'all out. Alright? Alright. Thank you. Alright. Thank you. Do not bring the horse. Alright. Hey, kid. And he reaches into his pocket and he flicks a coin at you. And the bottom kid catches it somehow. The horse is very confused. Yeah. Just get the hell away from me.

Thank you. And he heads back up the gangplank. And Tuck, as the two kids, scurries up the deck. And you head off the dock? Yeah. And just as we round out of their sight line, I drop the illusion because I'm like, I'm so tired. Tuck, that was really hard. You did such a good job, Billy. Very convincing. That guy hated me, for sure. Oh, yeah. And while you were doing one fairy move, you did another fairy move? My brain feels like puddings. So many types. Do you want some pudding? You know what?

I don't. Oh, whoa. Oh my god. He is tired. Yeah. I pick him up and I put him in a sling that I have just across the deck. Across my chest. Thank you. So he can have a rest. Thank you. Baby fanny pack. Yeah. Okay, cool. So you're gonna meet, you have a meeting while two kids in a trench coat have a meeting with Greg at the clamshell pub in a few hours. It's like, not even noon, basically. So you've got some time. Should we go set up a trap then outside of the pub? Oh, totes. Oh, yeah, totally.

Let's go scope it out. Yeah. If only we had a trap expert. Oh! Oh! So you head to, you ask around and head to the clamshell pub, which is near one of the other harbors that we talked about. It's closer to an area of the coast that is like home to a bunch of like clam beds, basically. So a lot of people go down and farm clams. And the clamshell is actually, the front of it is made to look like a giant clamshell. So it's like carved out of wood and the clam mouth opens up. It's open all the time.

Well, actually, no. When the bar closes, it does close the clamshell. Oh, wow. Cool. It's just a drinking establishment. It's a little rougher. This is kind of a like sailor bar. Are you going in or are you just keeping an eye out? Maybe we, can we scope out the outside first? Yeah. There are some barrels with stools set around them in the front and there are a few rough looking customers from all ports drinking outside in the middle of the day.

There are like alleys on either side that go into the bar. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. So like twisting labyrinthine like back passages. Okay. Yeah. I'll discern a reality. All right. Doing a lot of discerning realities. Well, we don't know anything about this fucking town. Yeah. Three. Okay. So you're looking at the clamshell, the clamshell pub and the alleys around it. Definitely, if we were at like the mouth of this alleyway, we would definitely get the jump on Greg. No question.

Guys, we should hang out in the mouth of this alleyway. Get the fucking jump on Greg. He'll come down one of these. And you head into the alleyway past the entrance of the clamshell pub into like the narrow spot between what looks like a bunch of maybe apartments and just a bunch of like brick buildings next to you. So it's pretty tight. It's a little almost too tight for tuck. Uh-huh. And as you're walking down the alley, you feel that there is someone behind you. Turn around.

The alley is being blocked by what appears to be a centaur wearing purple silk clothes. Oh, no. With curly blonde hair and long fingernails. Fabio. Oh, fucking shit. Shoot first. Okay. So what is Billy's first instinct? Definitely like I throw. I throw. Okay. All right. Let me look some stuff up. Oh, you know what? I was picking up beach glass on the way to the clamshell. Uh-huh. So I throw that and they're pretty big. He found a piece that's just glass. They're not worn down.

They're like fresh beach glass. Makes sense because like the patrons of the clamshell just like chuck their bottles. Yeah. Yeah. And Billy was like, oh, beach glass. Yeah. Just broken beer bottles. That's why we didn't notice the centaur walking behind us because both Vig and I were trying to wrestle glass out of our kids hands. It's just glass. Billy, not on a beach. We don't think you're going to hurt yourself. You're going to hurt one of us. Okay. Yeah. Billy, go for it.

So it's going to be volley. I guess. Sure. 2d6 plus dexterity. So I got a three. Not great. Yeah. Mark a point of experience. I will. Billy as you're walking down this alleyway, you feel the presence behind you and you turn and see Fabio and you throw the glass right away and it just clatters off his chest. Yeah. Ah, it was a handful of beach class. Just like, ha. All right. It's going to be like that, huh? Well, you showed up in the darkness behind us like a weirdo.

Yeah, I did because I'm robbing you and you look behind you and there are several other centers that are penning you in and talk is like I told you guys is a great alleyway for ambush. Yeah. Oh, that would be the perfect line. To end the episode on if we didn't need more time if we didn't need a full 40 minutes more than we have now. So Fabio is like, hey, you know, you could have just sold me the sunstone. Oh, it's that guy. Yeah. Yeah. Fucking sunstone shit dick.

Do you think we still have the sunstone? You moron. Hand it over. We don't have it. Don't have it. All right. Hand everything else over. You think we hang on to money, you moron? Yeah, we spent most of it. Well, then how about I take the things you bought with that money and I sell those after you're dead? Hey, I bought these fists with it. Do you want to do you want those two for one, baby? Oh, great line. Let me say that. Okay. Yeah, go for it. No.

And tech, he pulls the giant axe off his back and he's like, yeah. And for me, it's one for the price of one. And Fabio crosses his arms over his chest and even more over his. His centaur body and looks at the axe and goes, I'm going to make a fortune off that thing and snaps and says, get them boys. Oh, fuck. And the centaurs behind you start charging down the alley. I mean, one at a time.

It's just one centaur because I already unfortunately said this is quite a narrow alleyway and Fabio is coming at you from the other side. So what do you do? I turn to engage the guy behind us. Okay. Yeah. This centaur is wearing a he's got like a bowling shirt on with a white tank top underneath and he's kind of balding on the top of his head. Thin gold chain. Yeah. And he's just coming at you. His front legs start to kick up and it looks like he's just going to try and kick you to death.

How high are centaur heads? How high up does a camel go? Ten feet. Good lord. They're huge. All right. Then yeah, this guy is ten feet tall. Tech wants to kind of do a war cry because you can enter the battle with a show of force. He wants to like jump and double knee this guy in the face. Okay. So war cry is more of like a thing before you fight as opposed to like an actual fight move. So this is the thing that's going to tell this guy. Hey, don't fuck with me. Yeah, right. Okay. Do that 13.

Yeah. So you guys get plus one forward and your enemies feel fear and act accordingly. So what is your war cry sound like? I go one for one bitches and I do the jump in the double knee to his face. Uh, yeah. Okay. So he is extremely surprised by that double knee and rears back and like just starts backing out of the alley and is like no way, no way, no way. Yeah. And Fabio runs. He's like these guys are cowards. That's the thing is they were hoping to ambush you, but they get kind of jammed up.

Fabio books. He's away and he's like wrap it up boys. Bring me their stuff. Come meet me back at the shop and he's gone. But the centaurs on the other side of the alley are like kind of mashed up because they were coming down one at a time. So he the one that was coming at you is still kicking his hooves at you, but they're definitely trying to get away. Okay. What do you do? I try and dodge. Yeah, because he's trying to stomp me right? Yeah. Yeah. Defy danger con uh dexterity. Okay. Five. Okay.

Yeah. Uh roll a d6 two. Uh so you get clobbered a good couple times by this centaur hoof and you take four damage. Yeah. Billy tuck is getting kicked in the face by a centaur. What do you do? Um, I would like to hack and slash with my short sword. Okay. Hack and slash 2d6. Well, actually this could be a backstab. So you can choose to just deal your damage without rolling or you can roll plus dexterity for extra stuff. I want to roll for dexterity. Okay. So 2d6 plus dex. Eight. Okay.

So on a seven and nine you choose one of these. You don't get into melee with them. You deal your damage plus 1d6. You create an advantage taking plus one forward or you reduce their armor by one until they repair it. I want to create an advantage toward thing. Okay, perfect. What does this look like? Oh, I try to do something cool like figure eight slash and my arms are really short and it's a really small sword so I can actually do that in this narrow alleyway. Yeah.

I'm like pew pew swish swish get away you big bully and it works like because he's kicking it tuck and then the second he puts his hoof down it gets nicked by a little kid and he's like, ah, what the fuck and this guy is way off balance because the other centaur is trying to push forward and everything is just kind of in a deadlock thing. Yeah, I'll fight with honor to see how many hold I get. Oh, yeah 13. All right. So that is all of your hold that you acquire.

So I'm going to run in and he just knocked you back. He's about to fall over backwards. Yeah, he's trying to fall over backwards, but there's a centaur. Behind him and a centaur behind him. Oh great. So I'm going to domino these centaurs for sure. Hell yeah. Perfect. I'm going to bicycle kick towards them. Okay. I don't have to roll anything. Yeah. What are your hold options for fight with honor cross the distance between yourself and a foe bypassing all obstacles. That would be the obstacle.

Yeah. So I run by and do parkour off off the back of and then launch my feet forward and hoof this guy in the chest. Hopefully he'll tip over backwards. Fuck. Yeah. So what are you spending another hold to deal your damage? Yes, please. Okay, then yeah, go ahead and deal your damage to so you bicycle kick two feet in this guy's face and they're pretty sturdy. So it feels like he gets hit a little bit, but he's not terribly hurt.

He's more scared than he is hurt right now and you are now kind of on top of this centaur pile, I guess. Oh, they're kind of keeping you float on the three of them and that is definitely a position of power for sure. Yeah tuck Ving has just flipped over your head and kick the centaur in the face. What position is the centaur in?

He's like up rearing back tuck just wants to like go underneath and like grab him on the I guess the armpits of the front legs and then just like huck him back on the pile of guys behind him. Yeah, give me a defy danger. Strength. Fuck you. You piece of shit 10 10. Yeah, you grab this guy and you shove him back onto the pile of other centaurs and you just start walking them out of the alley tick.

Yeah, like you are just one foot after the other Ving is on top of the pile surfing riding him like yeah, and you eventually get to the wider part of the alley where there's just a bunch of garbage cans behind some businesses and you tip them all over in a pile on top of one another. And they're just like I fucking goddamn trying to extricate themselves Billy. There's now a pile of centaurs in front of you. What do you do? Um, I use my sword to cut off some of the pouches that are on their belt.

Oh, hell. Yeah, steal from you boy. Yeah. So that would be tricks of the trade. Sure 2d6 plus dexterity nine. Okay, so Billy on a seven to nine you still do it but the GM will offer you two options between suspicion danger or cost and I think it's going to be cost and danger cost. Okay, so you start cutting at some pouches that they have slung around their horse waist like a belt.

There's some pouches on there and you just cut one of the belts full on right off and all of their pouches fall to the ground. But as you do that, they start to write themselves and one of them stomps down on your short sword and snaps it. It's so small now. It's even shorter. But they all get up and they start like moving away from you and they're pointing at you like this isn't the last you've seen of us. We're going to get you and we're going to get you good.

Yeah, when you were pointing at us, there's three more pointing at you pal. Get out of here. We're getting out of here, but because we want to not because you're telling us to. Ving does the chest and they all run. They run down the alleyway. Fuck. Yeah and you have a pile of centaur bags, I guess. Cool rifle. Let's go through this. Yeah. Yeah. Nice. We should get booth inside the clamshell and rifle through a treasure. Let's get some calamari. Yeah. This treasure. All right.

So you guys go back to the clamshell. Yeah. Okay, perfect. You get a booth. It is every pirate bar you've ever seen in a movie about pirates. There's like wax candles melting to stubs on barrels. Nice. Greasy oil lanterns flapping in the rafters and just a variety of real like dirty missing teeth tattoos kind of people people with a lot of different animals on their shoulders. Oh, yeah, totally. And there is one family that looks completely out of place and like they're having a great time.

They're like tourists. Yeah, it's like, wow, look at all of these seafaring people. They just are so fling. I love coming to this part of town. They read about on a Yelp stone out front. Yeah, and they're like the waiter like, oh, my God, I'm so scared. I'm so scared. He's like, oh, my God, I'm so scared. I'm so scared. He's like, oh, my God, I'm so scared. I'm so scared. He comes by and the dad grabs him and he's like, excuse me, sir. What is your most disgusting menu item?

It's my son's birthday. I heard you have a free clam that you give them a free clam. Yeah, everybody gets the same clam. We take it back after the meal and you guys have your own booth. What are you doing? Braving through this shit. I didn't have anything in mind for the stuff they'd have. So do you guys want to give me one thing each that you find in these pouches? Yeah, without being extremely outlandish. Okay. Yeah. So let's start with Abdul. Um, I find I find a diary, a diary. Yeah. Okay.

Yeah, you find a a like a crime diary. Yeah, it might be a crime diary, but it does have like the heart shaped lock and like the little bear key. So could be anything really. I mean, yeah. Do you pop it open? Yeah, pop it open inside in the very first page. In McCollum, you see to dad. Happy birthday. This was a gift from his kid. Looks like fuck this sucks. I feel bad about this now, but you see the first page that he's written on goes dear diary. I love doing crime.

Here is a detailing of all of the operations I have been involved in in the last six months. Oh, cool. This is actually useful. Sick. Yeah, and it looks like there's a lot of inside information about the city's like crime. Oh, cool. Take a look at this later. Bing. What is being find being finds a big ring of keys and a few weird coins he's never seen before made with strange metals. Oh, interesting. Yeah, cool.

Keys and strange metals like you want to Spout Lore about these coins or anything or just hold on to him for later. Yeah, I'll Spout Lore about a couple couple of these ancient coins and old coins like lucky coins. Oh, they're not even like money coins. They look like they're keeps like good luck charms. I like lucky coins. That's cool. Yeah, one side scratched all up. Maybe cool. 1010. So something interesting and useful. I'm going to say they're both like similar coins.

Okay, and anybody have any ideas about this ancient coin? What it might be? It's a big copper coin. Interesting. It's got a little tiny hole in the middle. Oh, what if it's a white cloud mountain? Great. It has a square hole in the middle. Oh, yeah. Yeah. So it's a yeah, it's a kind of coin that you have maybe seen once or twice, but you have read about it recently in your sagely studies as being a currency from a place called the white cloud mountains. It's cold. Very cold. That's cool. Yeah.

Yeah. And there you also get something useful from that with a 10 plus. Right. So what would the thing be? Hmm. It could be a thing like maybe the writing on the coin. He's realizing that he's seen similar writing on a few buildings in town. Oh, hmm. So there's people from the white cloud mountains in town, maybe perhaps what did Billy find in the pouches? Billy found one dose of poison. Oh, interesting. What kind of poison? It is truth serum. Whoa, cool. What? Okay.

See the shit eating grin that Jessica's giving me what I have to have fun. So you find one dose of a truth serum and the way that you find out that it is truth serum is you dip your pinky into it and you put it on your tongue and Billy immediately says I have to poop. Go to the fucking bathroom Billy. Okay. You better not be lying. I'm not. Don't drink that though. Okay. All right. So I little stopper back to the bathroom and it's extremely pirate themed. There's like anchors on the wall.

There's a mechanical seagull that's like very jerkily flapping its wings in there. I really like it in here. Like the serum makes you poop. This could come in handy. Are you backed up? Yeah, he was. He's been so stressed out lately. I haven't shit in weeks. Great. So I guess you just kill time until you think Greg's going to show up. Yeah, we're kind of going to approach him head on, right? Are we ambushing him or do we want to just like be like, yo, what up, dude? Let's have a convo.

I mean, we could do that with ambush as like the backup plan. Yeah. And we have nowhere to take him except the cave. Yeah, where our dragon is. Yeah, a very rare expensive dragon. If we bring anybody back to the cave, he will try to kill them. Yeah. Man, we might have created a problem for this town. Bring a dragon into it. Maybe was right dragon in a cave near an inhabited city. That's never been a problem in a fantasy. And we have to go pick him up tonight, too. Yeah. And take him somewhere.

Oh, yeah. Tide is coming in. Okay, so you pass some time in the clamshell pub. We've eaten so much calamari. We got bored of it and transition to popcorn trip. Yeah. And that's once you transition, you were like, oh, the popcorn shrimp. That's why people come here. Like you've got the one good thing on the menu. They've got so many different kinds of dips. Wow. Oh, yes. We're ordering flights of dips. Are I got a cilantro dip with lime and also spicy waffle jelly. Oh, wow. Holy shit.

Sounds great. Fucking sweet and savory. Yes, please. What kind of dip did Bing get? There's one. It's a horse radish and ketchup. It's cocktail sauce. But it's so good. I haven't had it since the forest. This is like Prince dip. Oh, wow. Nostalgic. Holy shit. Amazing. I wonder if that means that there's somebody from the core of the woods that passed through here or works in the kitchen. I've never had this outside of the woods. Wow. Write that down. Yeah. What kind of dip did Tuck get?

He got kind of like weak sauce. Like mayonnaise? No, it's called weak sauce. And it's like, what is that? It's like a real thin, like mostly water with a little bit of barbecue sauce in it. And it's the thing that the urchins used to eat mostly like it was their kind of thing. So it's like a nostalgic thing for him. He was just like, I want some weak sauce. That makes a lot of sense.

I also think it's funny that it's probably not a thing that's on the menu because the urchins would just get a little bit of sauce. They'd get like one ketchup packet and then they'd put it in water to make it stretch for everybody. Totally. So Tuck's just putting sauce in his water. No, it's the kind of thing that like if you order it, then they're like, oh, you're a local. Like you're from here. So they like don't gouge you and shit. Yeah.

And the camera pans back and we see in the chef's window, the chef watching. You all enjoy the flight of dips and a single tear rolls down his wrinkly cheek. Oh, nice. And we cut back to the table and the sun begins to approach setting. Oh my God. What about a dragon? When's the tide coming in? What time is it? You're asking me about tides. They come in, as we all know, at the time of a flag, a waiter and a waiter comes up. He's got a peg leg. Yes. What time does the tide come in?

Oh, well, of course, we all know that the tide comes in at the time of somebody help me out here. Midnight. Midnight. The tide comes in here at midnight because the sea of graves is a mysterious, mysterious mistress. So we should have just enough time to confront Greg and then go back to the cave to get our friend. Yeah, I feel like we got time. It's like seven or eight, maybe. Telling this to the waiter. Yeah, is there anything else that you need me to know about this man you're meeting?

Uh, yeah. If a guy comes in who looks… What does Greg look like? He's… He's like, uh, in his forties. He's a pretty thick dude. He's bald, I think. Does he have a scar? He has a tattoo. Uh… He has the rake tattoo. Hmm. Uh, if a guy comes in with, like, kind of a tattoo of a rake on his arm, can you seat him at this table? At your table? Yeah. Tell him that some people are here to talk to him. I could. For a price. Ugh. I'll give you a hundred gold coins. Yes! Absolutely!

Hand it over, boy-o! Okay, wait. Yo, what's a reasonable amount of money, do you think? A hundred gold coins sounds like a good price. Is that all our money? No, we have a hundred and ninety. He's hilarious. He's pulling your leg. I'm gonna say this is just friend to friend. Let's say we're pals. You've been enjoying the sauce. I've been enjoying watching you enjoying the sauce. Don't go talking about how much money you have in this part of town. Alright, fair enough. Thank you.

I think that's worth a hundred gold coins. Yeah, that information. Hand it over, baby! I'll give you forty. Fuck yes! Okay, here you go. Oh my god. I'll do anything for you. Another flight of sauces, please. On the house. Oh, thanks. And he is just like gripping this bag of coins so tight as he walks into the back and he kisses it a couple times. Billy shouts, follow your dreams! And he looks back and he's like running this place is my dream. Wow. He's living his dreams.

I hope I'm like him when I grow up. And he kisses two fingers and he points at the sky and he goes into the back and I don't know like forty minutes later. You're all sitting in your booth. You've forgotten. You're all drinking your sauces. I imagine you started taking them like shooters. We're just drinking sauce now. Cold popcorn shrimp. They're out of shrimp now. Yeah, we've drained the bar of shrimp and now we're draining the sauce. Keep it coming, keep it coming. Bang the table.

Erasmus, one more. Bring the bottle. This guy's name is Erasmus? Erasmus. Sick. Oh, I like this guy. And yeah, about forty minutes later Erasmus seats Greg and he is taken through the bar and brought to this booth and he stops dead. We put hoods up so he doesn't see our face. So we, cause we want to do a dramatic reveal. We do. We've been talking about this for hours. Yeah, so we've all got our hoods up or something like a napkin. Yeah, two of us have hoods and Billy just has a napkin.

That thing is folded into a pirate's hat for him. It's shaped like a little hat. Oh, that's so cute. And Erasmus walks away and Greg sees you all sitting there and he stops for a moment. He goes sorry, he didn't tell me anybody was sitting here. I'm just going to grab another table and he turns and starts to walk away. Hold friend. He holds. I'm sure we have room for one more. For a friend from our past. Hood off.

He turns and he sees your three faces because Billy wasn't hiding his he realizes, but he was sitting so low that he couldn't see him. Yeah, I just look up. Peeks up over the edge of the counter and his hand immediately goes to his belt. Wait. Hold on. We just want to talk. He doesn't draw his knife, but he doesn't take his hand off it. Look, we know you guys are in town. The vendors are in town and we just want to figure out kind of like what what our situation is with you guys.

We don't want it to come to blows. We've been friendly in the past. So he looks around and realizes he's alone and he grabs a chair from a table and he sits at the end of the booth. He doesn't get in the booth. He sits like at the end of the table. You got 30 seconds. Okay. What are you guys doing in town? Looking for you. What do you think? Are you serious? You can't. Fucking through the sea of graves for us. Yeah. Are you not aware of the things that you have done? Clearly not.

We invited you to a popcorn shrimp restaurant using a ruse of a two kids in a trench coat kind of thing that of course that was I should have known. I should have known. I should have known. That's what he said. Do you understand? The kind of shit you're in? I don't know. Like explain it maybe because it was a long time ago. All right. We've been in so many different types of shit since you last saw us. Okay, fine. 30 seconds up. I'm talking now.

Let me explain to you the sequence of events as far as we know them. You leave Mudlark with the box. You go ostensibly to the vault to deliver the box. Yes. On the orders of Maggie Cole. Yes. We did that. We delivered a box. It takes you for fucking ever. I am short and my legs are small too and it takes me a long time to walk. You left on horseback. It couldn't carry me. And people kept talking to us all the time. Interruptions right and left.

We start hearing stories about people going to the spirit realm about monsters made of water. We send people to the vault because we haven't heard jack shit. We get there. Something's wrong with our golem. Something's up with the thing we asked you to deliver and then all hell breaks loose and a living storm sweeps across the principalities. My bad. This is what I'm talking about. This is why we're looking for y'all. Do you understand the fucking shit storm you left behind?

What happened after the storm? I don't know how to explain it. Things are happening. Things are being seen. There are beasts like we've never seen before. There are fires that act as if they have purpose and goals. They burn like they have a grudge. There are winds that whip to the bone. The principalities is a fucking mess. And as far as we can tell, it's because of you three. If I weren't outnumbered right now, I would have tried to kill each and every one of you.

Well, that's fucking rude, dude. We ordered you weak sauce. We saved your popcorn shrimp. He grabs the weak sauce and he grabs the popcorn shrimp and he lifts it up and he dumps it right on the ground. Fuck you. Fuck your shrimp. Fuck your sauce. That storm was not our fault. No? No. He said it was. Well, he's just… Quick to accept blame for most things. That's what I'm trying to say. Yes. It's just the kind of guy he is. He thinks everything's his fault.

He thought shape-shifting was like so bad that he stopped doing it. It's true. I'm gonna walk out of here. I'm gonna get up. I'm gonna keep my hands in sight. No. What? Stay. Somebody try and somebody roll something to convince him. Can we parlay with him? Sure. What are you offering? That we'll go with him? Oh, or because we don't want to put ourselves in a situation where Maggie's just gonna slit our throats. But why would she do that? Because it seems like they think we ended the world.

But they need us because if we caused it, we can fix it. We can uncause it. I don't know that that is true. Like things that break things usually don't fix the point. But we have pro. And if he gets his magic back, he could try to fix it. Yeah. We technically still have the box. Yeah. Sort of thing. Kind of. Yeah. And we kind of did what they wanted because Perel's not a wizard anymore. That's true. Mm-hmm. Okay. Yeah. What if we tell them that?

What if we tell you that we did exactly what you want just in our way? Yeah. Yeah. Elaborate. Get us a meeting with Maggie on our terms. On neutral territory. Mm-hmm. Roll for it. Somewhere where we can't be ambushed. I understand what neutral territory means. In our cave where we're staying, just the three of us. That is not neutral territory. That is a corner that is, we're so fucked if that happens. It's so dark, it drops right into the ocean. We have a dragon in there. He's not that big.

It doesn't fucking matter. He's an idiot. Come into the house we're staying at in which we have a cannon pointed at the door. Exactly. But trust that we will not fire it. All right. So wait, who wants to parlay? I mean, who did most of the talking just now? Tuck. I'll do it. Okay. I have the worst luck. Beautiful. It's gonna go so fucking bad. 36 plus charisma. Oh, Lord. Lord of Flame, please help me convince this guy not to fucking kill us. Holy shit. 12. Okay. All right. Okay.

He takes a deep breath. He reaches across the table and he grabs the glasses of weak sauce. And he shoots it. He flips the glass over and places it on the countertop. Cool. And he wipes his face. He says, All right. Fine. I'll talk to Maggie. I'll get you a meeting. You name the time. We'll name the place. But we will keep this above board. I will make sure that it is kept above board against my better judgment because I don't trust the three of you. I don't trust you far as I can throw you.

And I've tried to throw you. And I can't do it. That's fair. So when sunrise. Yes. I look at Billy and I say sunrise. Neutral territory. Neutral territory. Okay. All right. Fuck. I don't know any place in this goddamn town. Yeah. We also don't know anything about this fucking city. Hey, all right. The clamshell where all are welcome. Back here? Yeah. Okay. All right. Fine. Sunrise here. Wait. Is this place 24 hours? Hey, Rasmus. Yes. When? What time do you open? I open I opened 20 years ago.

When? Like, I mean. So, yeah. It's always open. Are you open every hour of the day? Till I die, my boy. Perfect. What is going on with Rasmus? He loves his job. It feels like he's doesn't leave this place. Why would I? I got everything I need right here. His eyes are fucking spinning in his goleming on this place. It feels like Rasmus might have been a member of the court of the wood who just went crazy in this bar and took it over. Yeah, I could be. Yeah.

Maybe if you take a peek at his ears underneath his long stringy white hair, there'll be a hint of health and he yeah. So sunrise clamshell meeting with Maggie Cole breakfast. Menu breakfast shrimp. Oh, nice hollandaise sauce instead of breaded with panko. It's breaded with hollandaise. Oh, yeah. Okay, great. So he gets up. He holds his hands up in front of them and he walks out and we all we try and do a four-way high five with him.

He lets it happen and he walks backwards out of the bar and you see him. He's still making eye contact with you. He gets to the saloon style doors and then the second he gets to the doors, he runs tell Maggie that we look forward to seeing her. He's long. Sorry. He heard me. He did. He heard he was so far away. Heard the situation heard me this. The town needs to know the clamshell knows Rasmus. Just you know, just bring us the bell.

Tell her that we look forward to like way more point in that just both of you being like he left. Why did you say that? He couldn't hear you. He waited until we watched him leave and then the second he was out of sight you started talking to him. In a normal voice tell her that we look forward to seeing her again. I sniffed that horseradish sauce. I'm like what's in it? These are fucking duck moves looking off into the distance.

You hear like yeah Eagles cry and that's where we're going to end it for this week. I'm your game master Sean O'Hara joining me as always playing Tacoma Dome the Barbarian Abdulaziz so long everybody playing being the half-elf druid Paul offers. Take care everyone and playing fat Billy the halfling thief Jessica tie. Bye everyone.

Thank you as always to Aaron read for our incredible intro natural music and thank you to our supporters from around the world for supporting us online and on Patreon which you can find at speltlord.com slash money please or patreon.com slash Spout Lore and if you go to speltlord.com slash money please you will get access to absolute shit ton of bonus audio content monthly streams alternating between Q&A's and a new bonus game played using the fiasco system in which we portray the Lone Tree Hill players in a series of teen drama inspired stage plays that are absolute chaos and they're so fucked if you like this show you're gonna love them and postcards there are gift boxes it's a whole thing just go check it out and we'll catch you next time and so ends the tale of adventures three who tried the best they can though dumb and scared and lost they be for time's abreast in revelry and though our journey may be like a conclusion we will not leave you without a resolution return next week to hear some more whilst you commute or do your chores and for you I'd gladly Spout Lore with a

Hi this is ving knees vang zuba calling from the spirit world long time listener just like you please continue to support us at patreon slash spell or uh you can help pay for such things as wow mission chairs are free people give us money go to patreon.com slash spell or spell lord.com slash money please how many zeds are in that there are no zeds sorry there's three z's I'm gonna put the links in the show notes now the round friends let me tell you a tale of three heroes noble and bold a brute a druid and a thief who is but nine years old you know them by name you know them you you a a a a By deed their quests are famously daring So here I sit singing to you an adventure that is worth sharing Tuck is the brute, he knows not his home, he loves to sing and fight Fingers half-elf, he shifts his shape and wields a spear with great might Billy's a thief, his tiny size does mask the largest heart Best and brightest they may not be, but their friendship outweighs their smarts So gather round friends and listen close For the tale's about to start Hello all of you When last we left our heroes So much information was provided that I feel that this recap may take longer than the episode itself So what did we fucking learn last episode?

We learned that Farrah has an upper limit of information she can take in Yeah, you revealed information that you'd been withholding to various people in your lives Not intentionally though, we were people Kept saying we were withholding information We were mainly just forgetting to tell anyone it Yeah, exactly Withholding by omission You learned that Perel has a family Had a family Before he became a wizard You learned about the day he became a wizard Which involved him in his confusion of his new state Flash freezing a town, he said You learned that him Aquarius And Morris Were sort of all together romantically A long, long time ago And the various dramatic things that happened within that relationship You told Perel that Aquaria was alive A fact he was not aware of So he took the moss and Communicated with Aquaria for the first time in over a hundred years Somebody help me out here There was a lot of stuff We went, we talked to Farrah after that Yeah Oh, yeah She was giving a talk on dragon physiology Right We learned some stuff about dragon physiology Yeah Which is that they have balls and a cloaca You talked to her about The fact that Aquaria was alive A fact she was also unaware of Yeah, and we explained all the Ving stuff that had happened with the druids We possibly talked about the nature of the cosmos of the world we find ourselves Yeah Yeah, we hypothesized We hypothesized on What it is that creates wizards Came to some very interesting conclusions You asked Perel about his whole realms including wizard hotspots wi-fi hotspots the ones that you've been to the ones he knows about and how those might be an extremely dangerous option for getting the information and uh resources that you need to just help perel achieve the various goals that he has had now that he's talked to aquaria he thinks that it's possible to talk to morris too so that's also become a goal of his you know what I mean okay it's not just get my magic back it's find morris yeah go through a hot spot find morris because he doesn't know if it's one one contiguous realm that the wizards created if it's several realms like could be anything you all have decided to after faro was like we can help you find the medjay books we can help find irk we can help find the knife you all decided that it was time to subcontract that quest out for a little bit yeah while you head to the port town that billy saw the clear water arriving at to confront the menders hopefully or like figure out what the fuck they're doing there yeah if they're even there for us because maybe not could just be their own holiday and it's kind of nice to spy yeah um and you talked to black spire yeah he showed you that he found a huge boulder of sunstone and did not eat it yes good boy good boy we convinced black yeah!

Black spire to take us to that northern port town yep yeah the poor town that uh is the uh one of the end points of the tallow road yeah yeah the tallow road stretches from a port town in the north which is how people can sail to this continent and then theoretically the town that you all arrived at yes yes this is where we came in yeah and then it goes oh it starts there and then goes all the way south and there's a bunch of like smaller towns on the way down and then it goes it terminates at mccall goes through mccall terminates the lighthouse cool uh okay so that is kind of where we find our heroes now on the back of their mighty steed black spire the dragon who has since taken to the desert with a speed and a power heretofore unseen and he did that for about 30 minutes pretty good and now he's like oh my god it is so hot out here yeah yeah!

How long do we gotta do this for yeah how far is it pretty far I would say at least if there's like a bunch of towns and stuff I would honestly say from mccall probably two days yeah okay that makes sense uh I assume that your plan is to not do a lot of stopping probably like stop at an inn when it's nighttime and then keep traveling yeah that makes sense cool uh then you're traveling along a safe route like you're just on the tallow road so you're not gonna have to roll a perilous journey it'll just take you two days to get to this town okay the town is called uh what about like wick port or something like that oh cute yeah yeah like it's just a little well actually I guess it's a pretty bustly kind of port town because it's really the only seaport that close to mccall mm-hmm damn yeah so this would be a kind of big town actually yeah yeah it's not like a metropolis or anything like that but it's bigger than like a town like mccall's town yeah yeah it's not like a metropolis or anything like that but it's bigger than like a town like mccall's town like a burg you know what I mean yeah yeah it's quite large I think yeah so what's the attention you guys are getting like on the tallow road as you're traveling to wick port I feel like it's not a lot because there's so many different people and things going going in and out and going on yeah that's a good point you like you all probably see some weird fucking animals on your way up the road right like weird like really long-legged like shaggy animals with carriages slung underneath their bellies like uh somebody's riding like a big snake at one point you're like what the fuck shia I was so shy I see a we see a couple of light guard on on the back of a worm oh like traveling the road traveling next to the road because the worms go through the sand totally but there's like I think there's a worm root that goes next to the road yeah like a furrow next in the sand that the worms travel down you carry back on down the road uh you see a little bit of a you spend a night at a very nice uh inn that has kind of like an outdoor section uh so you that black spire sleeps in just under the stars and uh the next day starts up and you all carry on down the road what's another thing that you see I'm trying to think of something cool so we've done animal big worm what about a person person okay they're coming off a port town so they could be from fucking anywhere this could be a totally new person too like you know like new uh new culture new ancestry like worm do we see a worm no it doesn't have to be we maybe see a mirage of worm yeah I see a mirage of worm oh yeah I'm looking with my block binoculars and he's waving he looks exactly like you remember him worm come over here billy is that you I have something to tell you you know I'm not a worm how are the waffles this year oh they're amazing I've got one here would you like to taste it yes well come on over don't bring tuck and ving oh I should probably tell them though no don't do that they'll eat the wapple we're looking at billy bill you all right bud don't larms over there he told me he has a wapple but he said not to tell you guys we look over there there's a cactus with a wapple with two it's like swaying in the sand and it has uh two big purple flowers on the two arms of the cactus oh billy no that's a mirage cactus really I take take off my blockulars yeah you take your hands down and you see this cactus swaying and you see it like shake its two flowers and it makes this like and there's two like little tendrils that flip out of the cactus oh my gosh I could have been eaten yeah those cactuses are like they kind of like draw people in the the flowers put out like a some kind of like drug thing oh yeah maybe maybe the cactus is like the lure of a bigger beast that lives in the sand oh yeah actually yeah while you're watching this and billy takes off his binoculars and it realizes that its prey has caught wise the cactus into the sand there's a big puff of sand and then it's gone all right let's stay on the road yes I'm not gonna use my I'll put my binoculars on my binoculars and I'm gonna put my binoculars on my binoculars and I'm gonna put my binoculars on my binoculars away it's a good scary ass cactus uh and you know there's a there's another full day of that you stop at another inn that is like basically just one big shed uh there are a few other travelers in there and you travel for half the day after that oh wait what do we have money no because you uh lost all in gambling right yeah I gambled it all away so we had like two coins left how are we paying for this inn stuff I wonder if we're like I don't know just sneaking in at random times and we're picking only like the open air shelters right yeah right you slept outside the first night okay let me try the guy at the inn last night was not into it but let me try and talk to this guy see if I can like convince him to let us stay here for free okay there's an orc really tall really skinny for an orc whoa what's up hey uh my name is tuck we're just looking for a room room to stay yeah cool it's five coins a night five coins whoa okay hey you know what I don't have that on me okay well you know there's a I don't know there's like a hitching post outside you go and sleep on the ground can't charge you for the ground that's pretty nice of you I appreciate that but um we've been sleeping pretty rough the last couple of days there's something I can maybe offer you instead of money that you might want uh-huh that might be cool for us to stay for a while okay for a night okay like what like what do you like what do you got uh I like money well I feel like I've already kind of communicated that I don't have that but you know what's as good as money love and lust are you saying that you'll me if I let you stay here no no no no no no it's like starts away because I mean oh my god okay no no all right wait no never mind I made myself vulnerable I'm not interested anymore I was offering you actually this like we have a choose your own adventure love and lust if you are into it super rare copy it's pretty rare it's a really old one it's signed by us yeah yeah we ruined it we yeah we opened the first page and it's mostly just billy's drawing all right parlay 2d6 plus charisma I'm gonna go to the next page shit wow three plus three is six nice aid oh yeah yeah 2d6 plus bond um if you let us stay here you won't have to choose your own adventure I'll show you the best way through this book the sexiest finish sweet eight nine eight nine makes that a seven seven to nine he says all right he takes a look at he grabs the book and he looks at it turn to page 69 I would love to but I cannot read so here's the deal awww cause smash got two bing reading the book yeah tuck and bing uh doing an act out of a scene from love and lust yes billy is watching with this tall orc whose name is mills and he's sitting cross-legged on the floor in the uh like common area of the inn nobody's staying here oh yeah yeah he's fine he's pushed some tables out of the way uh what was the last thing that we did oh yeah that's true yeah that's true the hot dog it was a lot of hot dog based stuff right then do something else I know I know I'm just trying to remember the kind of general theme of this love and loss the theme is two nights that are in love okay was it kind of a romeo and juliet where like the two nights were on opposite sides but they like fell in love something like that yeah it was like a forbidden romance kind of all right all right I'll play binge hawk binge hawk yeah all right he's one of the nights yeah who are you playing I'm gonna play binge hawks dad king I don't want a son and dad scene I want like a spicy scene okay I'm playing the other night what's his name singe fuck oh all right hey kid you should not be here for this okay can I uh yeah you could go there's a room upstairs upstairs yeah nice hey what's your lizard doing what is it we look outside inside he's got his head in the window well he likes stories too okay fine whatever lizard want to hang out that's cool lizard what I get that's cool and then uh what's nils is like you know what that's a pretty good thing I should put that on a t-shirt once I learned to write you guys can teach me how to write too right this is a lot man this is a lot for a room we came here to rest and Billy's resting.

Yeah. Billy's upstairs snoozing away now. We're doing this like really tired. Oh man. Binge, you're so sexy. Minge. Wait, what was your name? Minge. Minge Singe. That's my name. Minge, you're sexy too. Your fat pecs makes me want to lick them all up and down. Just like I licked the ketchup off this hot dog. Is there this much hot dog stuff in the book? There's a lot of hot dog stuff in here, man. That's weird. I know. Anyways.

This hot dog is nice, but it'd be twice as nice if it was a pogo stick. Insert stick. Wait, what? Is that in the book? The best thing that goes with ketchup, you know it, and he pulls out mustard. Okay, so there's a… There's an option here. Do you want Minge to put mustard on the hot dog, or do you want him to put mustard on my hot dog? Whoa. Let's do the hot dog. Hot dog for sure. I just met you guys. All right, page 441. All right. There's more than 400 pages in this book. It's huge.

It's like two feet thick. Minge puts the mustard between his knees and then squeezes it gently. Okay. And does a little wiggle back and forth, a little dance with his hands on his head. Do-do-do-do-do-do-do. And puts a little mustard on the dog. I hope you like spicy mustard. You want grainy or smooth or honey mustard? I'm imagining that it's just Tuck holding out the hot dog, looking at the hot dog as Ving puts mustard on it, and he's like thrusting in the air like, yeah, mustard.

And then you look over at Nils and he's asleep. Oh, thank God. Do we have to keep doing it? Wee-wee-wee-wee-wee-wee-wee-wee. I kind of want to know how this ends. Does he eat the hot dog? Or did he eat my hot dog? Go to page 555. Smash got to the morning. Nils is standing in the doorway waving bye-bye. Bye, Nils. Thanks. Thanks for staying. Always feel like you can come back to Nils Thrills and Beds. And Chills. One. Fuck. Nils Thrills and Chills is great. Just to say.

And he starts climbing the front of his building. He does not know how to write, so he's not going to be able to fix it. Oh, yeah. No, the sign is a picture of a bed. Oh, okay. And a crude picture of his face going with a thumbs up. Nils. Yeah, and you guys carry on. And I'd say about halfway through the next day, you see the edge of Wickport is opening up before you. Traffic on the road is getting heavier. People coming and going at all. Speeds on all means of conveyance. And there's no wall.

So the town just kind of opens. Like you can just walk right in. And there's no guards or anything like that on the edge of town. What does the town look like? It is a pretty eclectic collection of architecture styles. A lot of people from a lot of parts of the world have come here to live and build and work over time. There are some classic, like, sturdy, like, you know, sandstone McCollum style buildings with what kind of ornamentation to McCollum buildings usually have. I don't know.

Like, I feel like the architecture is kind of just like a low one story long, kind of like ugly, ugly. We're all looking over at Jessica like, what's going to happen? Are you serious right now? I just learned about wind catchers. What are those? Middle East. Middle East. Middle East. In Middle Eastern architecture, it's like a lot of buildings will have, like, towers, I guess, with holes and channels in them to, like, catch wind that, like, naturally ventilate in cool buildings. Oh, cool.

So I think there's some of those styles. There's a lot of, like, kind of graded windows, like, that are kind of ornate in their designs. When there are glass windows, it's like thick blocks that, like, keep out the heat. Cool. Yeah. That's really cool. They're not sunstone. They're not sunstone, but they're, like, fake sunstone. So they absorb, like, some of the light, and then they glow a bit after. They're more kind of just, like, infused with some sandworm shit. Gotcha. That's really cool.

You see some styles that are very reminiscent of, like, principalities architecture throughout the ages, like ancient styles and more modern styles, and some buildings that look so fucking weird, you have no idea where they're from. Whoa. Sandstone versions of Great North buildings. Yeah. Totally. What do those look like? Domes. Ooh. Yeah. That are just barely peeking up out of the ground. Oh, interesting. Yeah. That's cool. And there is, like, you know, a billion different kinds of people here.

It's a pretty busy place. So you know, like, any market scene from, like, a spy movie where they go to, like, the Middle East or something like that? There's, like, the symbols, and there's, like, people playing music on flutes. It's that kind of thing. There's a huge press of people. There's music everywhere. There's a guy with, like, a huge, like, metal container on his back. He's, like, pouring, like, purple rose hip tea out for people. So cool. Chilled tea. Mm-hmm.

There's a building where the guy is converting the skiffs and ships that come in into sand boats. Oh, cool. Yeah. Interesting. There's, like, a retrofitting service. Yeah. It's pretty big business. That's really cool. That is cool. And they don't fuck up your boat. Like, they just set it on, like, a ski kind of apparatus. That's really neat. Yeah. We don't fuck up your boat. That's what the guy said outside. Yeah. Mr. Boat, we don't fuck up your boat.

And then the guy across the street from him is like, we don't either. We just don't have it on the sign. He's outside telling people this. We don't fuck up your boats either. I promise. You should put it on your sign. He already did, though. I feel like he'd be copying. So what's your plan now that you're here? Black Spire is, like, there are a lot of people. What do I do? What's wrong, buddy? There's just, I'm, like, can I? And he's backing up.

Like, you're on top of him and he starts backing up out of town. Then he goes, like, just outside kind of, like, the main ring of buildings on the edge of town. And he's like, what do you need? Like, a hole. You guys got, like, a hole? I mean, we could maybe try to look for a hole. Maybe an upstairs hole or a downstairs hole. Downstairs hole would be nice. Maybe we go, like, kind of along the coast. Coastal cliff? Like, next to the seaside?

See if there's any caves in there that you'd feel comfortable in? Yeah. Natural cool cave? Yeah. Does that sound good, buddy? That sounds fucking lit. There's, um, so there's tons of, like, piers coming off of the cliffside. And we walk through an area where they've been harvesting kelp. And they're all, like, flapping in the wind, drying. Oh, wow. Cooling the tides out. Yeah. Nice. It's nice. You can feel the sea spray. It's kind of the first time we've been cooling. It's nice. It's nice.

It's nice. It's nice. It's nice. It's nice. It's been cool in a long time. Yeah. Billy is, like, has opened up his layers. And it's just like, oh, my red cheeks. The cooling sea mists. Like, he's lifted up his shirt so it could flap in the wind and, like, send nice cold air up his tummy. Oh, yeah. Like, it's a vent. Yeah. It's a vent. Should we discern realities of this? Yeah. Great. Discern realities. 2d6 plus wisdom. Nine. Nine. So you get one question from the discern realities list.

Useful or valuable? Yeah. So you're, like, outside. You know, you're on the beach and the piers, but you're kind of outside town. Like, once it's just beach, you go a ways past the kind of kelp hunters where the kelp beds start to thin out a little bit and you find a cliff with a cave. But there's water kind of lapping at the mouth of the cave. And he's like, hell, yeah, hole. And he starts moving pretty fast. Towards the hole with you guys on his back. Oh, shit. Shit.

And he just he just barges into the hole. Is it safe? Like, are we sure? Is it dry? Do we know the tide's not going to come in and fill him in? Ving, actually, you would recognize. Yeah, there's probably going to be some tidal situations. Okay. But not for a while. Like, he's also really big. Like, if he needs to get out of here, he can get out of here. Okay. Don't fall asleep for too long. Okay. Oh, I'm not. I'm not falling asleep. I'm going to enjoy all this wet, dark. It's been a while.

I've been in that shit dark for a while. And I'm just going to enjoy it in here. Yeah. I mean, this might be nice because the tide is going to come in at some point. It might get you, like, cleaned up a bit. Oh, yeah. That's a great idea. Because we've been trying to pick all the shit out of your scales. There is a lot of it. There is a lot of it. It's baked in. Yeah. Well, I can hang out here, I guess. Cool. Thank you. Yeah, no problem.

I just figured it would make more sense for me to, like, be out of the way so we don't have to worry about where I am, like, in a scene. So I'm just going to fucking vibe out in this cave. Will you leave some of that crunch here or I will lose it? Okay. Yeah, man. Sick. Billy takes one of the pouches of the sunstone crunch. Here you go, boy. You did such a good job getting us here. Okay. Just put it over there. Okay. I have to ration it out. I don't want to look at it.

I don't want to eat it all right now. I don't want to eat it all right now. But come back eventually. Yeah, we'll be back, like, probably later tonight. Okay. What if somebody finds me? Just kill them? No, just scream. Chomp them. No, just growl at them like crazy. They'll run away, probably. Okay. All right. Don't. Wait. Don't breathe lava. Don't barf on anybody. Why? Because you're super rare, man. People try and take you if they know that you're a dragon. They're going to try and take me?

Well, no, probably not. Like, if you just chill out here, no one will probably find you. But if they do, just, like, hiss and, like, get mad at them. And if they try to grab you, then just run away. Yeah. If they try and come in, pretend you're, like, an eel or something. Yeah. A bunch of slithering eels. Pretend you're a nest of fucking eels. All right. Don't know what those are, but I will. Don't worry about your old pal. Can you just, for our sake, pretend to be an eel for one second? Okay.

Eh. Better get out of here, you fucking eel. I'm an eel. I'm going to poison you. That works. That's good. All right. Pretty spooky. And we leave, and we walk around the corner. And then Tuck's like, if he pretends to be an eel, they're going to figure out he's a dragon right away. Yeah. They'll know right away. Cannot do it. Yeah. And you head back into Wickport? Yes. All right. So what's your plan here? I think, first and foremost, we need to, like, hawk the sunstone to, like, get some money.

Oh. Yeah. Get some cash. Yeah. So there's probably, like, one of those, like, I buy gold, et cetera. Because this is a town of money exchanger. Yeah. Because there's tons of different money, currencies coming from all around the world. Yeah. So there's, like, bankers, currency changers. But then there's, like, pawn shops, and we buy gold places. That's so funny. And as you're walking by, they're like, hey, sir, my friend, my friend, come on in here. Come on in here. Exchange your gold over here.

Our rates are the best in town. Yeah. This guy's 4%. Fuck. Him. I do 3.5. Is that good or bad? And your favorite or mine? Who knows? Do you know? I mean, do you guys know? I don't know. Well, come on in, and we'll all find out together. Okay. Let's go in. Wait. Hold on. Hold on. Hold on. This guy feels like he's trying to trick us. Yeah. Billy? I'm going to do trap expert. Oh, good idea. That is a fantastic idea. Nice. Yeah. I don't want to be trapped in a bad deal or a mortgage or something.

So, 7 plus… Dexterity, I believe? 9. Okay. So, you get one question. Yeah. I can aid him. Sure. Oh, yeah. Sure. Yeah. I'm just like, don't trust the shifty eyes of his. Nice. 7. Sweet. So, that means I get to ask all three. Yeah. So, is there a trap here? And if so, what activates it? Yeah. Yeah. Entering this guy's shop activates the trap where he tries to fuck you over. I knew it. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. It's some classic thumb on the scale stuff where he's going to tell you that he's got a certain rate that he pays for certain weights of precious materials, but he's going to tip the scale in his favor so you get way less money. What else is hidden here? What else is hidden here is he takes you into a shop. He is a centaur. Classic fucking centaur moves. Whoa. Hey, man. Don't bring that kind of energy into my shop. All right. Hey, we haven't brought anything into yours.

To your shop yet. Centaurs are not a monolith. All right. I'm a skeezy guy just because of me. Just because of my life. I've got a full on purple silk shirt that I'm wearing. I've got, I don't know what. Normally long fingernails. Super long fingernails. I've got gold bangles on my wrists. I have long curly blonde hair that is, it goes all the way down to my camel part. Down my camel toes. Yeah. And my name is Fabio. Fabio. My name's Fabio. Welcome to Fabio's Fabiolus Deals. Wow. Yeah.

So come on in. Let's get a deal going. What do you say? Sure. We would like to trade in some of our stuff for money. That is what we do here at Fabio's Fabiolus Deals. Yeah, man. Here, I got this and I take the sunstone out and I drop a dinner plate size piece of sunstone in front of him. Okay, so are we in his shop? Yeah. Okay, yeah. So he goes behind the counter and he kneels down in that centaur way so he's kind of like human level with the counter. Yeah. And this is what else is hidden here.

You hear the fantasy equivalent of that mobster money counting machine and you hear voices in the back and there's definitely some business going on back there. Oh, I see. Okay. Yeah. And you drop this dinner plate size, this piece of sunstone and he goes, okay, yeah, we can do this. Let's see. He acts suspiciously calm when you put it down in front of him.

All right, let me just take a look and he grabs one of those like jeweler's loops and puts it in his eye and then he leans in and he goes, oh, that's bright. And he gets a smoked lens jeweler's loop. Oh, cool. He's like, whew. Yeah, all right. This looks, picks it up, puts it up to the light which is also weird that he's doing this. Careful. Careful. Oh, no. Hey, kid, this isn't the first time that I've dealt with something like this. His hands are shaky. Sweating.

Ah, you know, the quality is not great. The cut's not the best. I could give you 20 coins. Okay, well, then we'll get out of here. No, no, no, no. Hold on, hold on, hold on. Let me take another look. Let me take another look. Okay, all right. Okay, you're twisting my arm. You're twisted Fabio's arm and he puts his arm out and goes, go on, twist my arm. All right. Being fist pumped. Yeah. Okay, all right. All right. 60 coins. Nah. 60? Fuck that, man. 100% Elaine Springs pure sunstone, buddy.

Hey, look, you don't have to tell me. You don't have to tell me what pure sunstone looks like, all right? It's not this. Well, then, we will be taking this elsewhere. Okay, good luck. Later. Okay. Yep. I fart. All right. There's somebody across the street who's also doing his job but they're not bugging us. Yeah, and this is like a stooped human woman. She's pale. She has like long, dark hair. She's like, ah, hello, dearies.

If you've got money and currency to change, you come on in to old Bertha's place and we'll get you set up right. Hey, that Fabio guy just tried to fuck us. Can you be straight with us? I mean, I can see what I can do. Okay. And then I show her the plate of sunstone. Holy shit. All right. I trust this lady. Yeah. That's a lot of sunstone you're carrying around. Why don't you come inside? Okay. Yeah, let's get in here. Don't show that in the street, dear. Hello. Hello.

And she waves you into her shop. She's got white all over her face. Yeah, she's got white cream all over her face. It's my cooling cream. Yeah, it's her sunscreen. She's got a floral shirt on over a heaving bosom that looks a little too solid. She's got a skirt and stockings and curly gray hair. I changed her look entirely. Yeah, I do like the idea that this is real world Robin Williams, though. Yeah. Yeah. R.I.P. So she brings you into her store, which is there's doilies everywhere.

There's like old lamps. There's like a nice upholstered chair. Yeah. And a cat. I go pet a cat. Pet the kitty. Very fluffy, like long haired, gray and white. Just like laying on the counter like Paul do the yeah, but it's a McCollum cat. Oh, I like it's that's so fucking weird. What a weird thing to do. What is a McCollum? What's the difference? I don't know, Billy. What's the difference between a McCollum cat and a regular cat? These ones are two more legs. Two more legs. A bunch of tails.

So it's really a bit. It's not too long, but it is a lot longer. Yeah, it's got more legs in the middle. Yeah, half cat in the bag. Yeah, yeah, it's a centaur. It's got two tails to both parts of the center are both cat. Yeah, and it's just a cat with yet just a little bit longer six legs and two tails. Yeah, dude. Oh, yeah, that's more tomorrow. He's been a he's been a good friend of mine for years now. Hi, Mortimer. Oh, yeah, he loves to be scratched.

She leads you into the store and she closes the door behind you and she flips the open sign to closed and, and locks it and then the shades down the shades down and walks back behind the counter and sits in her old lady rocking chair and goes, all right, let's see the merchandise. So I, I take it back out of my backpack and I hand it to her and it illuminates this dim money. I would say in the daytime you can see light coming through the cracks in.

Yeah, yeah, she's like my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, wherever, where did you find this? Yeah, somewhere in the desert. Far away. Yeah, we were kind of traveling the Tallow Road, sort of taking our time and we stopped and we saw something shining and shining in the distance in the desert. We trekked out to it. It was this two to six plus charisma. Seven. She says, don't try and bullshit the bullshit that are saddened. Fuck. You found this in the desert is what you're telling me.

Fine. We were in like a old cave thing and we took it. All right. That's all I wanted to know. You don't have to try and light the Bertha. I buy things from weird people all the time. Weird people. Well, I mean, come on, but nothing. Um, so I could take this off your hands for, uh, let's say a hundred coin. Oh, Bertha. We trusted you. What? I'm trying. I have a business hundred coins. That's a fucking ransom. This is, but this, you could eat like a, a full Turkey on this plate of sunstone.

All right. All right. What are you suggesting? Oh, like a thousand thousand. Fuck my ass. A thousand coin. Absolutely not. I mean, we could just take this back with us. Okay. Somebody roll something like a parlay. I guess this would probably be def. Well, I guess the parlay is, we'll just go somewhere else. Yeah. Yeah. Okay. Here we go. Eight. Hmm. Eight. Okay. All right. 500 coin. I mean, that's a fair jump from a hundred. Yeah. Five 15. You got yourself a deal. Five 25. Can I wait? What?

I'm not sure. I'm not sure. I want, I want like something extra, like something cozy. Yeah. Something cozy. Yeah. I'm really liking this cat. No, I won't take your cat. No, I won't take your cat. Maybe he's got like, like some, I've been petting him for a while and I've got all this fur that I've collected into a little ball. Like five 25 plus this fur ball. I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I think I can let it go. Nice.

And she goes back into the back room of her shop and you hear, ah, ah, ah, what? She comes out waddling with a chest. Oh shit. With 525 coins in her foot. Oh no. She's like, oh yeah. No, I got it. He got it. Okay. Then with your knees, oh, if I had my wood. I really feel like I should help you. I'm not sure if I should help you. No, I got it. Okay. And she bends deep and she thunks the chest up on the counter. We're just gonna fucking carry this chest around.

Oh wait, I could give you a, oh, I could give you a promissory note, I suppose. Sorry, a what? It's like an old kind of like, it's basically paper money before paper money was paper money. Oh. A promissory note. It's like, yeah, I'm Bertha and they can have 400 coins from my account. Okay, that makes more sense. You don't have to carry around a huge chest. I'll just put this back then. No, you gotta let me help you put it back. No, it's fine. I got it. I got it. I've lived this long.

I'll live a bit longer. And she goes, it steals my wool. She goes, oh, and she tilts almost all the way backwards. Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. Oh, whoa, whoa.

Oh, this so I'm gonna put it in my backpack uh uh I mean I can't argue with that and you already have it yeah in your hand I can't reach it anyway so I guess so okay uh and uh bertha leads you to the door and kind of sees you out onto the street and she's standing in the doorway and she says deities I would have paid two thousand and then she closes the door no no no no no she closes the door and locks it fucking shit fuck fuck but I mean you guys made a bunch of money back like almost all the money that tuck lost way more money you had 94 coins yeah I lost 98 coins damn you guys you guys are loaded again cool let's go live fat on the hog or whatever you've completely forgotten your quest immediately we're rich guys we're rich again for all the mud baths and I mean you are in a market oh they have such nice silks do have nice silks oh billy do you want some silks maybe so cooling I have been wearing this collar and tie and this like linen tunic for a while and then my blanket is a cape and then also as a hood and then my my regular hood the raccoon hood yeah the raccoon is over a blanket cloak no it's under it it's always under billy what do you want I have that oh have that blue silk because then I can match my blanket oh yeah are there any patterns on it oh it has little stars stitched in nice oh cool beautiful that looks like perel's old cloak oh it does yeah uh yeah and the the fabric seller uh says that it's uh it's five coins yeah yeah sure and they go no way we're so baller right now you went from being so aggressively frugal to being like yeah whatever here you go yeah I don't even care how much it is you reach into here and you take how much you think it's fair I don't give a shit man uh yeah and billy has a nice little flowy silk wrap outfit now yeah I've I undressed right there and I left all my old clothes I didn't want anymore behind it's like sweat stain yeah tunic yeah and yeah anything else you guys want to grab in this market uh there's a antiques dealer and I um he's got uh like um old artifacts and there's a a big old giant's knuckle whoa like on a like you would display it in a front hall or something a big chunk of obsidian I want to get it for black spire oh that's really nice get him a treat he's like it's two thousand coins okay maybe I'll take some cool weapons or something then uh I deal in antiquities you think I'm just giving these things away well don't be a dick about it I will be a dick about it until you all respect history and tucks like oh fine yeah history and then he pulls out the chain mail shirt and silver grieve that he got from uh lillian's tomb this guy's eyes bug out of his head and then tuck puts it back in his backpack and he puts it back it's like oh no sorry that'll be 90 000 gold hold on maybe you need to respect history a bit more and then when tucks his history grabs his own crotch can I can I take another quick peek quick peek at that oh sorry no a quick peek is 400 000 gold I just I just want to see it I just want to see it sir no and then he moonwalks out of the store flipping the guy all right and this wasn't even a store this was a stall on the street so you're moonwalking through a crowd of people sorry sorry sorry so I mean are you still this antiques thing you want to buy it some stuff it's fine you guys leave this guy he feels like he fucking blew it you see him later he's got his head in his hands he's just like oh my god that comes along but a while my mom's gonna be so mad at me I can't believe she let me watch the stall today and I blew it this bad anything else anybody wants to buy arrows weapons I don't need any weapons don't need arrows I really need armor or food I can't really buy anything I don't need any weapons I don't need man like it's not like we have like a magic weapon shop you can go to because that doesn't really exist is there a fun thing that we could roll for a treasure like we could buy there's some cool thing we could do something fun like that I can look up oh what's this I was just thinking some stores maybe it's like a thrift shop and they have a mystery box like little yeah fun bags box oh you know what you see and because this is mccall it's been a while since you've seen something like this you see a uh very simple looking building with a sign that says general store oh shit no it was uh in little sir there was a place called general store that was a traveler shrine yeah it's everything is one coin oh man we should have went there first to save so much money yeah cool they would have definitely had all this stuff uh and you walk into the general store and there it what's the what's the person of the general store look like one coin same guy it looks like the exact same guy walk in he says hey welcome to general store attack he's just like what the fuck he's got a little necklace that has like the symbol of the traveler around his neck what's your name dude bottle uh it's uh uh bart did you used to work in the principalities ah what can I help you for this guy gets around uh we're we're not really looking for anything in particular right guys not really we just want like fun stuff I guess yeah yeah that's like can we yeah we just want something fun and do you have any missed surprise boxes all right it's all uh kind of surprise everything's one coin shells boxes you kind of dig around you find what you want okay should we go dig around let's go go pick an aisle and go dig okay all right we're going picking cool let me just uh find a sort of random treasure generator okay so you guys are each just what digging around yeah rooting around all right um um um um um um um um um um um um um um um um um um um um um um um um um um um um um um um um um um um um um um um um um um um um um um um um um um um um um um um um um um um um um um um um um um um um um um um um um um um um um um um um um um um um um um um um um um um um um um um um um um um um um um um um um um um um um um um um um um um um um um um um um um um um um um um um um um um um um um um um um um um um um um um um um um um um um um um um um um um um um um um um um um um um um um um um um um um um um um um um um um um um um um um um um um um um um um um um um um um um um um um um um um um um um um um um um um um um um um um um um um um um um first I'll roll first okay roll a d6 I dig in I lift the tile with the tip of my speed I finally found a use for the spear just one just one d6 yeah I'm on it uh you open up this tile in the floor and you find a very simple looking cloth doll skewered with needles whoa what's the doll look like just a very simple like arms legs round head no no distinctive clothing nope no distinctive clothing oh was there like a lock of hair tied to it or anything no just a sack doll with needles in it does it smell weird I mean you found it under a tile in the ground so yes it smells like ground tile weird freaky that thanks one coin one coin wait you're buying this fucking thing I don't know stuck is like whoa whoa whoa whoa whoa whoa whoa he smacks the coin out of out of the out of the coin out of Vink's hand.

He's like, whoa, whoa. It could come in useful. We don't know what it is. No, no, no. I've seen this happen too many times to too many friends. What? Never again. This is like a monkey's paw. Yeah, I'm… This is… Dude, this is cursed for sure. Uh-uh. Can you tell us this isn't cursed? Uh-uh. Is that why it was under the floor under something so we would never find it? Uh-uh. Uh-uh. So, yeah. This is fucking… Just get something else. There's a ton of shit here. Guys, I don't know.

You know what? Okay. He reaches for it and he grabs the doll and he puts it behind the counter. Something else. Okay. Sorry. I'm sorry. Did you really want it? No, I got weird vibes from that thing. Okay. Oh, really? That thing gives me the creeps. Sorry. That was on a random thing. That's so funny. We look down at the doll after Sean says, oh, really? And the doll is like turns around. Yeah. And it looks like Ving has got wild gray hair. Okay. So Billy's looking now? Yeah. Roll a d6. One.

Billy finds a silver ring with a green gem set into it. Wow. Shit. Whoa. This is way better. Yeah. This doesn't feel haunted at all. Tastes fine. Billy could taste hauntings, actually. He's 100% right. 100% of the time. Yeah. It could be a coincidence so far. One coin. Okay. Here you go. Pop a coin up on the counter. He takes it, slides it behind the counter. He can write $3.99. All right. Anybody else looking for something? Yeah. I'll try my hand at this shit house. All right. D6. Four.

You find a scarf and it smells faintly of perfume. I take a deep breath of it. It reminds you of somebody. Is it Allison? That's what we're all thinking. And then Tuck, he takes a deep breath of it and he smells the familiar smell of a girl that hurt his feelings. One time. A lot. And then he runs to the front of the counter and then like reaches across and grabs Bart and pulls him in close. He doesn't move. Wow. Holy shit. Strong. Tuck pulls himself across the counter.

And using Bart as leverage. And he's so close to Bart's face and he's like, did a redheaded woman tell you this? No, I need to know. Bart, I fucking swear to God, I'll give you whatever if you tell me this answer to this question. There's nothing you could offer me that I'm interested in. I cannot betray the sacred trust of the general store. I'll give you a hundred gold coins. It was a redheaded woman. I got it. I just spent so much. It's okay. You know what? We're into it. It was worth it.

How long ago is it? No, you have. I just gave you a hundred gold coins. He does the little money finger symbol. No, not another hundred. I'll give you another hundred gold coin if you tell me how long ago she was here. Six months. Fucking shit. She made it back. We're not giving him more of a hundred gold coins. No, I think what other information could we want about her? She's somewhere on this continent and she came back six months ago or was six months ago. Yeah, that's not bad information.

Yeah. Well, was she coming into town or was she leaving? Well, I beg to differ. This hundred bucks says you do know. Oh, that's so fucking funny. Billy pulls on the scarf until Tuck is down to his level. Hey, think logically about this. Allison couldn't have made it back over there and then back again in six months. It was obviously when she got here. Okay. Yeah, you're right. Good. Good thinking, Billy. Good thinking, Ving. I'm just looking at the doll. I think I think I need to go.

I need that doll. No, no. You just spent two hundred dollars on a scarf and you can't the doll doesn't have a mouth, but you can see it in your mind's eye mouthing. I'll be seeing you real soon. What the fuck? Scared. This is a family friendly show. Is it? Sean, I have to go sleep after this. Oh, no. Yeah, Jessica has to go to sleep after this and just before this, she cried. Your description of a scene from how to train your dragon to my early birthday. Oh, honey. And now she's holding a knife.

Her emotions are all over the place right now. Yeah. So that's what he tells you. And you spent two hundred gold figuring that out. Two hundred and one because I bought the scarf to. Wow. Good Lord. Does Ving want to check? This place is full of shit. You guys could keep checking for stuff. Does Ving want to take another take another turn? Yeah, I want to one more thing. The doll's telling me to take it too much. Tell me what to do, doll. I feel like you feel like you want it too much, doll.

Three. You find a copper spoon. Sick. I'll give you two dollars for this spoon and that doll right there. No thing. Are you serious? Two coin. He looks from talk to the guy. Bing ting ting. He takes the two coin puts it behind the counter. God fucking damn it. Ving is gonna be a whole thing now. I'm sorry. He says to the doll. Sorry. I almost left you at anything else. You guys want to grab from general story. You done. We should probably go. Yeah, we should go. Yeah. Talk once one more.

No, let's go. Actually at talk as you turn to leave. You see a dish on one shelf full of coins and you see the glint of obsidian. Oh, yeah. I dig around in there. Yeah, you find a obsidian coin with an eye carved into it. What? And then tuck turns to Bart and he's like about this one coin and they go. Have you ever seen a white one of these? I'm not giving you another hundred coins. Don't need it. I'll give you five coin. If you tell me if you've ever seen a white one of these.

You gave me a taste for wealth. My rate is now a hundred coins. You are so rich now, dude. I am. Yeah. So ever see a white one of these? No. Okay, cool. Well, I'm going to take this one for one coin. Yeah, and I'll give you the five coin for telling me. All right. Don't tell my brother Bartleby that I was accepting bribes. Well, I won't tell him if you give me two hundred coins. Interesting proposition. He goes. Well, and yeah, you had out. General story. Love it. I don't love generals.

I love a general weird fucking place. So where to now? Oh, I want to use a port in the storm. Okay. Yeah. What's a port in the storm? When you return to a civilized settlement that you visited before, tell the GM when you were last here and they will tell you how it's changed since then. Okay. So I've been we were here six months ago when we got. I think we probably got here with chimes. He probably dropped us off. Oh, yeah. Yeah. How it has changed is yeah, chimes is not here.

You kind of cast your eye about the dock from where you are in this like market area and you don't see his boat, but your eye is immediately drawn to a boat that is at the end of the harbor because it's so large and it is without a doubt the clear water fuck and I think that's where we're going to end it for this week. I'm your game master Sean O'Hara joining me as always playing Tacoma Dome. The Barbarian Abdulaziz so long playing being the half elf druid Paul offers. Take care of everybody.

Playing fat Billy the athlete thief Jessica tie by everyone. Thank you to Aaron Reed for our incredible intro and outro music and thank you to you are beautiful listeners for supporting the show.

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If you want to find us online we're at Spout Lore most places tell your friends leave us a review and we'll catch you next time. So when's the tale of adventures three who tried the best they can though dumb and scared and lost they be for times abreast in revelry and though our journey may be like a conclusion we will not leave you without a resolution return next week to hear some more whilst you commute or do your chores and for you I'd gladly Spout Lore

If you like Spout Lore and you want to hear Spell more of it Go to spellore.com slash money Please or patreon.com slash spellore Gather round friends Let me tell you a tale of three heroes Noble and bold A brute, a druid, and a thief Who is but nine years old You know them by name You know them by deed Their quests are famously daring So here I sit, singing to you An adventure that is worth sharing Tuck is the brute He knows not his home He loves to sing and fight Fingers half-elf He shifts his shape And wields a spear with great might Billy's a thief His tiny size Does mask the largest heart Best and brightest They may not be But their friendship outweighs their smarts So gather round friends And listen close For there's a lot of people The tale's about to start Hello everybody God damn it Hello everybody And welcome to Spout Lore I'm your game master Sean O'Hara And joining me as always playing Tacoma Dome The barbarian Abdul Aziz Playing Ving the half-elf druid Paul Oppers Hi there And playing Fat Billy the halfling thief Jessica Tai Whoa Hello It's puked A little bit in her mouth Yeah a little bit When last we left our heroes That we were all puking in the mouths of our brains With information that was exciting To us Our erstwhile heroes Sounds a wordsmith Thank you so much This is my job We opened the last episode With a little one-on-one combo With Tuck and Fatim Which started as a 1v1 In which Tuck performed a combo On Fatim But in that conversation Fatim attempted Very earnestly and very Poorly To explain partially Why he dislikes Tuck as much as he does Yeah And how He didn't say explicitly that he still doesn't like you But he was just like I'm sorry that's all I can do Is say that goodbye Yeah It was a nice thing for him to say And Tuck understands that It's a complicated thing Yeah We'll see how the rest of that goes Because after that he ran out of the room To apologize to a guy he yelled at 40 seconds before that So who knows what he's up to And then after that we found out Ving has been in correspondence with Shia She has been telling Ving about The goings on of the criminal underworld of McCall There's a Centaur mob boss Called Tommy Supremo Who has a chain of pizza places That is giving Shia a hard time And steps up to him To get her out of the way And then we learned That Perel had never been told By any of you That Aquaria was still alive That is on us 100% There's a lot of us withholding A lot of information in that episode Agreed So Perel was given Aquaria's moss That she bestowed upon Ving All those seasons ago And before that you learned that Perel had a family Before he became a wizard When he became a wizard He allowed her to live in a house And he alluded to the fact that Unable to control his newfound abilities He flash froze a town And then he just said Everything was different after that That's all he has said so far And then you went to Pharah And attended a lecture on dragon physiology Starring everyone's favorite Metalhead dragon Blackspire Blackspire!

Blackspire!

That's the little theme tune I'm going to get Aaron to make I'm going to put it in there every time we say the word Blackspire Oh god people are going to hate it And learn some stuff about dragon physiology And after that you talked to Pharah Who during the lecture Stopped Tuck from talking about The coins and the ability of Obsidian To mitigate demonic possession Etc And then told her That Aquaria was still alive And that you had withheld from her That there was another living wizard on the planet That is on us Yeah also on us Yeah and you talked for a while about Potential Alternatives to Perel Regaining his exact abilities And Billy also shared with Pharah That he had Pinky sworn A member of the Medjay to steal The potentially one of a kind Books containing their rituals And ceremonies And she immediately said You can have whatever you want To make that happen Yeah she took everything that you've told her People that you remember Names, what exactly happened during the ritual As much as you're willing to share The stone He's in a better place with it now For sure Yeah all the stuff about like the stone bowls And the knife And whatever potentially Oh yeah the stuff in the lighthouse All that shit So she's taken that all down And she took that information And was like thank you I'm going to go gather some people And we will be moving as soon as possible Moving what?

She's gonna send She tells you she's gonna send some people To the lighthouse To the lighthouse To kind of survey Through the ways that you told her Like how you got in They're gonna do some exploration Of the inside of the lighthouse Discern those realities Exactly And they're gonna investigate in general The operations of the Medjay Yeah you might wanna try and track down A guy named Erk That's the guy who's trying to get us these books Yes Erk And we have no way to get in contact with him And get those books Yeah I really forgot that That super important part of the pinky promise Understandable It could take his entire lifetime To get us those books Yes it could But don't fuck with him once you do find him Yeah he's a good guy He's working for us Alright understood Thank you And then she heads out and takes care of that Is there stuff you wanna do now?

Perel? I think Perel Yeah Perel Okay yeah We gotta go check on him So walking back to the room Mm-hmm Is he there? His door's still closed He goes Just a second Just a second And he like Flap flap flap Wait is he masturbating in here?

No He opens the door And he's dressed exactly how he was before In his like convalescence Like house coat And like little linen outfit And his eyes are red And his face is all splotchy And covered in tears And he Hey buddy He hugs All three of you Right away Whoa Hey He just pulls all three of you into a hug Whoa It's okay Big hug I hand him a linen handkerchief He Thank you And he wipes his face And he pulls out of the hug And he slaps Ving Full on in the face Whoa He slaps Tuck Full on in the face Ow And he points at Billy And he says Do not Ever Hide anything like this from me Ever again Oh Tuck is crying Yeah Okay Okay I'm sorry That I did that I'm sorry I'm sorry You pointed at Billy so hard It was the most pointed at I've ever been I'm sorry I just don't think that I can explain The gravity Of the information that you withheld from me You just You gotta use your words Aquaria Is one of The most Two people And you have all been very kind to me I care for you very dearly I count you amongst my very close friends Aquaria is one of two people That I consider The most important people To have ever lived Whoa What?

She is As family to me She is A part of me in a way That you could never understand And knowing That she is alive Is one of the greatest reliefs I have ever experienced And I'm sorry I get it I'm sorry It's okay Thank you so much For giving me this gift He kisses us all in the cheek He kisses you all in the cheek And he puts a finger in Billy's face And he pulls it away Very deliberately Wow It is undone Before Pearl moves away I pull his face back down to me And I kiss his cheeks And I say Pearl I'm so sorry I have wronged you in a way That I can never be forgiven I've already forgiven you No It is such a betrayal of our friendship That we did not tell you And it is an ignorance That is too vast to be conveyed And he points at Tuck When he says an ignorance That's too vast to be conveyed Tuck is picking his nose Says Billy thank you Thank you for saying that Thank you Thank you But as I've said All is forgiven If it wasn't for you three I wouldn't even know That she was still alive And now I am able to communicate With one of my oldest Dearest friends Whenever I choose How was it?

What did you guys talk about?

And Tuck pulls out a bottle of ox blood That he grabbed from the cafeteria On their way back To be like Let's get fucked up And talk about it Alright Yeah he pulls out He pulls out a bottle of ox blood He pulls the chair out of the one tiny little desk That he has in his quarters And puts it out in the room For whoever that wants to sit on it Can sit on it Tuck sits on the ground cross-legged Yeah Perel sits on his bed I also sit on the ground Ving puts the chair Wedges it up against the door handle Closes it And then sits on the ground And Perel takes the ox-headed Shaped stopper on the bottle And twists it off Removing it And pours He just drinks right out of the bottle He doesn't have any cups in his room Cool I guess Give me a little bit in my hand buddy He just hands you the bottle He's just like Oh okay Yeah Have you ever shared alcohol with anyone before?

I've never shared anything Wow I believe that actually So what do you want to know? I want to know why Aquaria is there Did you put her there?

No We didn't No You guys built that place though I helped I helped her I did some of the initial excavation of the pillar I obviously designed one of the trap rooms That protected Aquaria's study Obviously Asshole But it was just to serve as Aquaria's personal study laboratory You know it was a usual wizard tower kind of situation Yeah but someone must have brought her there Because she was really injured She actually was able to We talked about it briefly We're going to talk about it more But What happened is Aquaria is from a place to the north You're from the You know the principalities It's sort of to the north and east Called Turvor Okay And there around the time the exodus was starting to ramp up Their government really turned against magic users She was able to leave before anything really terrible happened But they found her in the principalities It was a fight She was mortally injured She was mortally injured But she was able to get herself to her tower In time to Inter herself In the situation that you found her in Is the moss keeping her alive?

Yes it is It's sort of a symbiosis at this point The moss is her She is the moss Blah blah blah Is there any way that she could live a life again outside of the tower? She says no I'm not sure Honestly if I had If I had my magic I could I could get her right up and moving again Magical medicine is not something that's Not something that was outside of my capabilities So that's a real Fucking shame Where the fuck is Morris then? Morris left Wait he was part of the exodus?

He was yes unfortunately After once things started getting Really bad At what ended up Accidentally I suppose being the final gathering Of wizards That was a thing that happened once in a while Whenever there was a significantly Tense period in history Like a conference? Yeah Wizcon Yes there would be Yeah it's a wizard conference There would be a gathering We would pull as many magic users as possible And we would discuss the state of events They'd talk about the magic users as well?

They'd talk about the new World of Warcraft game We all know what happens at Wizcon Yeah and at that event At that gathering A faction I suppose Made itself known They called themselves Wizards First Yeah They were the ones that said Enough is enough We have been working towards bettering Life for all and we're treated like garbage Blah blah blah And you know what?

Honestly at first I was like Fair point Fair point But then it became a We're better than them We're more than them And you know what? I'm an old man I've heard that shit a thousand times And it always works out the same way But Morris Bought it hook, line, and sinker Was Morris always a He was born a magician? Yes And he was born a wizard? He was born a wizard as a child He had a regular childhood He aged till about 20?

I wanna say He's mid to late 50s And then he stopped And I met him I think when he was about I wanna say like 130, 140 something Yeah Fuck He's like really thinking about something What are you thinking about? I want to discern realities You can just ask me Billy You can just ask me Nope I want to use my new Move Move Move Move Move Move Move Move Move Move Move Move Oh Oh is 12. Holy shit. Three questions from discern realities. Alright. What here is not what it appears to be?

Um Perel is attempting to talk about Morris as if he is like a dear friend and a colleague and you know you can tell that he felt a different way about Morris. Alright. Uh what does Perel want most? And he says I just want to talk to Morris again. Okay. What else is hidden here? You can tell in the way that he said that I just want to talk to Morris again. You can tell that Perel loved Morris. Oh like romantic. Yes. Was in love with Morris. Oh yeah triangle.

Wait was it a love triangle or was it I don't think it was a love triangle. I think it was a three way three part relationship. So like a polyamorous relationship. Like a polyamorous. Like they were a thruple, polycule whatever you want to call it. They had they were just all kind of with each other. So did Morris leave you and Aquaria then to follow wizards first? Yeah he did. He did. Um he did.

He heard about the developments that had been made in sort of uh what we call um interplanar thaumaturgy. It's also called way walking. Um fuck fucking cool. That's sick. Yeah. Yeah. He's awesome. That's fucking rad. I'll be honest with you. The first time I heard that phrase I had the same reaction. I was like that sounds fucking cool, but I never really had the hand for it. Um, but there was a development around the time that this uh there was a breakthrough. People had been working on it.

For fucking a ons um where people had discovered a way apparently allegedly if you fucking ask me, sorry, I'm feeling some kind of way now that I'm dredging all this up. Are you sure cursing a lot? Yeah, drinking a lot of this ox blood. Somebody else take it. Please. I think it's like half empty and you two have each had like a sip. Wow. I want to be clear. Billy has had none. He brought his own apple juice and it's enjoying himself way to go. A little fucking juice box. Yeah.

Um, yeah, there was sort of a breakthrough. It was um it was a combination of work from a lot of different wizards, uh, waywalkers, uh, illusionists, conjurers, and they had allegedly discovered a way to create a reality of their own design. Oh, you mean like the fanny pack? Kind of how it existed like outside of the world or whatever? The fanny pack he he had kind of the fanny pack was more of a a trick of space. Mm hmm. Whereas this was conjuration on an unimaginable scale.

A contiguous unending infinite realm of the magicians devising and people had decided that if that if we weren't going to be treated the way we wanted to be treated given the due respect we say we deserve. Uh, we're just going to find our own paradise. So you guys built a whole another plane of existence. That's the that's the theory. Wow. And that uh that was apparently too tempting for Morris to ignore and he just uh he just left one day. Didn't even say goodbye.

I touch Perel's hand and I say, I'm sorry. I'm sorry that he left you. It's hard to lose somebody you love. It sucks when they treat you like you don't matter. It does. Yeah, it does. But you know what? Fuck him. You know, if that's what he thought was the most important in his life was being a wizard, then he can take it. Yeah. Sounds like he didn't fucking deserve you. Yeah. He does. He laughs and he's like, thank you. Yeah. Thanks. Thank you. You know what? That tent wasn't that cool. Yeah.

And then right like come on. Sucks. He built a tent and then he put a fucking oil portrait of himself in the entryway. What an asshole. And then he just had like golf digest or whatever it was mud affairs. It's pretty lame. Sucks. That mud affairs was mine. Actually, he never gave it back. It's actually a really good magazine. It's a great magazine. People think that it's just smut, but the articles are really interesting. They've been doing it for a while. They've been rebranding lately.

There's t-shirts anyways. Yeah. So God, I just, you know, I just wish that I could talk to him again so I could find out why how he could justify that and borrowing all that to just tell him to fuck himself one more time. So you wait, did you get put away before the exodus in the box? I got put away after the I'm just realizing you guys have never asked me this before. Maybe Morris put him in the box. Morris put you in the box. No. Okay. Good. That was a good theory. Good thinking. Thanks guys.

Thank you. Thank you. That's a great that would have been crazy dramatic glasses on sage glasses. Yeah, I do also in my head. Imagine that Ving he had his glasses on. He had his back turned away from everyone. He was looking at a portrait, an oil portrait of the sea. And he was like Morris put you in the box, didn't he? And then he made seagull noises with his uncanny yeah. Yeah, that would have been so dramatic, right? But no, unfortunately that's not what happened.

Honestly, the time frame I remember a lot of my life, but the details are hard to nail down. Why? Because I've been alive for 250 years. Okay, it's think about like how old are you tuck like late twenties at this point. Probably yeah, it's that right there that right there. That's why I can't remember the details because you don't even know exactly how old you are. Yeah, but I don't know when I was born. Yeah. So what happened to you in the second month of your fifteenth year? My dog died.

This happens to be the month that all the bad shit. Wow, you really hit you hit on a month. There yeah, and tuck walks to the oil portrait of the sea. I don't even know where that portrait came from. That's not mine. I was like, did you guys bring that up in my room and then tuck like leans up against? He's like, oh, the month of darkness. Oh man, I really fucked up that night. This could take a while. Let me tell you about it. That was the month that my dog died. Dog, was his name? Dog died.

I'm really sad. My dog dog died and you know, I thought it couldn't get any worse than that. And then that was when Fatim stole my locket. I hadn't looked in there for years. I wish I had maybe one last time. Maybe now I'd remember what my mom looked like. Holy shit. I'm so sorry, tech. And that's only the beginning. Oh God. Slow fade clock on the wall goes forward spinning around and that was when the falafel place shut down. My favorite my favorite falafel place.

The falafel place where you had your first crying. He's got his blue blanket. I was just such an emotional day. What do you guys think happened to all the old falafels? Where did they go when no one wants them anymore? What about the recipes? Wow. So sorry, tuck. That was a horrible thing to do to you to make you dredge all that up. The point was the details in anybody's life get fuzzy over time. Oh yeah. Without a doubt. I don't remember anything else about my life. Shit.

I really nailed the one month. You remember everything. Damn. Yeah. So basically what I mean is that I'm really old and that it's hard to keep everything organized. Yeah. Billy has that problem too. Well, it's more. I don't forget what I do. It's just, you know, it's like a big blob of stuff that comes in and out of focus but I still remember everything clearly if I try hard enough or if it comes back in my brain and Pearl's kind of hooking his thumb at Billy like yeah like that. Exactly.

Well then Pearl what helps is when you have a really long nap and you get really comfortable and all those memories just come back and you can play with them in your head. And if you miss other memories, you can pull them out from their little blanket hiding spots. And if they're really far away, just like grow your roots. You stretch really hard and then oh, there it is.

And Pearl looks at the two of you and we just shake our head understanding the implicit question, which is did you know this is how Billy's brain works? I'll try that Billy. Thank you. So you don't remember the Exodus? Yeah. Kind of a memory. You don't remember the Exodus? Yeah. A blanket like disappearing of people? No, not strictly. The idea of the Exodus is an event is a misnomer. It was like a slow rolling avalanche. The starting of an era. Yeah. It was an era.

Yes, that is a good way to describe it. If I mean, according to Aquaria, it was over a period of like 10 to 15 years. Whoa. Political tensions rising, wars being fought, people disappearing, news getting out, this breakthrough happening, wizards leaving this, a plane of reality. It was sort of a thing that once it got to a certain point, there was no stopping it. But it was the Exodus happened and then the world fell apart, right? That's my, yeah, that's part of the rhyme.

Isn't it part of the story? Yeah, that's kind of what I've put together since you released me. It was a lot of civil wars and wars between smaller cities and small collections of villages. It was like a blanket being, you know, ripped apart and that's where all these people went. Sorry, I just think it's so funny that all of your metaphors are blankets. I don't have a lot of objects. Yeah, that's pretty much it.

From what I understand, something about the actual presence of wizards on this plane, on this planet. It's apparently very important to the balance of the ecosystem and the balance of, um, various other things. And without those wizards here, a lot of their works started to break down, some of them very dangerous, some of them vital to life. But I was put in the box a few years after Morris left.

Aquaria had went to her tower in the Sea of Graves and we were in contact but I was working on my own things and, um, you know, they came for me. Didn't you say you once said that you knew the Exodus would ruin the world? Um, I did, didn't I? I was trying to stop it. Yeah, you were trying to stop that. That's what I initially said to you. Yeah. I may have been overplaying my, uh, my role in world events a little bit in an attempt to get you to release me from my box.

Oh, let's all be honest with each other. How dare you not tell us? Oh, we slapped. Yeah. Slap Pearl's shin because that's all I have access to. Ow, Billy. Well, shame on you for lying to us. You know what? Fair, fair point, Billy. I shouldn't have lied to you. I'm not going to say that I didn't do anything. I did try. I certainly did try. I was part of a sort of another quote-unquote faction. We weren't as organized.

But we were attempting to convince wizards that were intent on leaving to stay, to stabilize things. Because as people disappeared and as the wizard population dwindled, there were parts of the world that started getting, you know, torn apart. Yeah. Like the fabric of reality, and this is just me asking, the fabric of reality just started to break down, right? Yeah.

When the magic leaking through, the rifts left when wizards went to whatever this realm is or realms, because they basically created a whole reality out of thalmic energy. So it was like a hose of raw magic, and that was fucking with everything. It's like corrosive to the substructure of what it like. Yeah, exactly.

Like, you know, there would be a town, and then for half a second, there would be a mountain range where that town was, and then the mountains would go away, and the town would be obliterated. Whoa, fuck. Yeah, it's like that kind of shit. Like, reality was just fucked. Is it still like that? In some places, yeah. You guys have been, like, into hotspots, and that of, like, the environment around you has changed rapidly. Like, that forest that turned into, like, the winter landscape and all that.

When we were going to the pool, right. Yeah. To get that dick monster out of your body. Yeah. Yes. Yeah, so that was a mild, frankly, that was a mild example of what a hotspot can do. Wow. Yeah. You guys fucked everything up. You guys. Sorry. You people. You people. Wow. Wow. Didn't know we were going to do this today. I didn't do fucking anything. Well, that's not true, but I didn't do that. Well, I didn't. I almost did, but I didn't.

After Morris left, I was really, I was, I was tempted to go after him. Yeah, but I didn't ultimately. Where would you have gone? Wherever the hell he went. Where did he go? What do you mean? How would you find him? I don't know. You don't know. No one that had gone through a hotspot after they started forming while I was alive came back. Every hotspot is the ones that we know of that you like. Aren't they terribly dangerous?

If there's like a potential for a mountain range to obliterate us, then they're insanely unpredictably dangerous. He starts nodding while Ving is saying that and is like, yeah, exactly. That's the thing. Like even getting to a hotspot. Oh, there's definitely a hotspot in the sea of graves. Oh, yeah. The eye of the storm is the eye of the storm. Is it? I mean, I assumed. Yeah. Yeah. Hypothesized. Yeah. It's the middle of the thing.

Middle is always the most important part, except for donuts and bagels. But is true for things like Tootsie Pops and grilled cheese sandwich. That is the best part of a grilled cheese sandwich is the middle. That's a good point, Billy. More of a crust, man. Well, I can understand that. I suppose I respect your decisions. It's just the cheese and the butter is all in the middle. Yeah, that's a good that's an interesting hypothesis that the middle of the storm is a hotspot.

There's a ton of atomic energy there coming down from the sky. Is the sky the hotspot? Then if there's anything more important than the middle of the thing, it's the top of the middle of the thing. It's like, let me just explain this to you. And he wheels in. A whiteboard. A whiteboard. And he draws like a circle. He's like all of this circle looks the same as the rest of the circle. But one of the parts of the circle is in the middle. And you needed a whole whiteboard for that.

I'd wanted to draw the circle as big as I could. And that's pretty big. But, you know, I was there. Well, I mean, I was kind of there. It was Pellar, but I was at the eye of the storm and I slash Pellar couldn't work magic there. What are the hotspots that we have been to? Possibly the eye of the storm. Maybe the eye of the storm. I think personally me, Perel thinks the vault might have been one. Oh, right. It is a hotspot. There was a lot of magic fuckery going on in there. Yeah.

That's why they wanted us to put it there was because because the magic leaking through was reinforcing enchantments. Yes. Okay. Well, at the vault we know where that is. We also know the pool where we first fought the peepee monster. Yeah. Oh, yeah. There's hotspots in the spirit world to why what do you mean? I don't know. I said it. What do you mean? Oh, well well, no, hold on. I guess that would make sense if a way Walker was able to get through to the spirit world. So wait, hold on.

There's a spirit realm in the iconic realm and there's our realm. Did did the wizards make their own like version of that? I mean, that's the theory because there's also the Faye to the fairy realm fairy realm. So is there a wizard realm now where all the wizards live? That's the again theory. I don't know if it's one realm or if it's many realms or if it's like a bunch of water balloons inside of a larger balloon kind of thing.

But if like if if can go to the spirit realm and Billy can go to the fairy realm, we can we can get you to the wizard realm. Yeah, that is very logical. I guy go to realm. No, no, no, no, no, no. I figured it out. I think we can all agree. I figured this thing out. It's a cool name for us who can like the realm travelers. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. The the the Perel takes his glasses off ghost pirate boy realm helm boys the realm sliders.

I feel like Stargate The discoverers of new realms The orbs of the sky I thought you were going to say the discovery channel The discovery channel What I, Billy, will do Is create a channel from here To the other realms To discover other realms A discovery channel If you will Oh my god, there's so many sharks in here Oh fuck But only for a week I feel like you might have all This is a very exciting idea I feel like you all instantly forgot about All of the dangers I just told you about And tuck points at the circle again Get that god damn whiteboard Out of my room You knocked over my ficus See, pick it up And he points with the ox blood bottle And one tiny little drop comes out Because it is empty Pick up my ficus He's pointing at a pair Of boots I'll pick up your ficus He's so shit-faced now So, yeah, great hypothesis Billy can apparently travel between realms Nobody told me that What?

You saw You saw him do it It's common knowledge What I saw was tuck pick me up Like a beanbag And throw me at a person Then, nothing Listen, it wasn't my fault that you didn't pay attention To what I was doing I guess you're right I guess today is Don't listen to Perel Day Oh, wait, that's every day He gets so saucy when he's drunk He's freaking out of his boot now I'm just saying That I already told you That even if there is a hot spot In the fairy or the spirit realm It's going to be massively dangerous Okay, we just need to find The closest hot spot And then what?

Fucking jump in and say Hey, cop Cosmos, don't obliterate us Yeah I guess so Do you think that'll work? You know, you just have to jump in With confidence in yourself Billy's going to go into like a Self-love sort of Does he go to the painting?

Yeah, he goes to the painting It's four feet above him Yeah, so he's leaning on the wall Screech Yeah, under the painting If you believe in yourself It makes the world believe in you When you look into the sky The stars And you think of All the possibilities That exist You realize that Nothing is impossible Perel, you are like one star in the sky There are so many other stars Out there waiting To greet you And if you shoot for those stars You will land amongst the moon Billy's just remembering Every motivational poster he's ever seen Yeah, and Live, love, laugh Live, laugh, love Hang in there There's no I in team But you can't spell it without me Can't spell it without me I hate Mondays And just TGIF So hang in there, kitty This family runs on coffee and love I cook with wine And sometimes I put it in the food Guys I really needed to hear that I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I think you're right I think I do just need to believe in myself And I still think this is a bad idea But I'm willing to die for this idea And that's what I want to say to you I am really happy that you're all here I'm really happy Aquarius here She's been listening to this whole thing, by the way Oh, Aquarius, what's up, girl?

She says, she says, hey Hey Hey, Aquarius, I miss you I loved looking at all of your stuff I miss you Oh Oh Oh need to sleep and he lays his head down on his pillow and snores immediately. I tuck him in with my little blue blanket. Sleep well, Prince. Mm-hmm. Tuck rubs his back for one minute. He throws up a little bit. Tuck lays him on his stomach. Oh, he's on his stomach. He's on his stomach.

It's just he's laying there and you're rubbing his back and he goes, and a little bit comes out of his mouth. Oh, God. Recovery position? Yeah. I push a bucket next to his bed and I'm just like, all right, hopefully he's fine. And yeah, Perel snoozes away. But so that's we got to a lot of stuff there. Hell yeah. So what's your plan now? Because now like Farah's out there. She's saying if you want to do stuff, go do stuff and I can pay for it. Before we go anywhere.

Today has taught us that we should probably tell Farah everything that happened in this room. We should include her on everything that we've learned. Yeah. Okay. We cut to Farah's office as she puts down her notebook and closes it and goes, oh my Lord. There's a whiteboard in the background with a circle on it and the middle is indicated. It says slash the top of the middle. She's like, this is just, you know what? I have been a librarian. Oh, we're longer than some of you have been alive.

And I have learned too much today. My brain is full. This is all wonderful information. You just again let me know. We've got a team almost ready to go. They will be heading to the lighthouse under cover of darkness to begin preliminary investigations. And once we learn the location of this irk or perhaps another magi hold safe house, then we will inform you. Would you like to be informed? Yes. Heck yes. Yeah. Would the three of you like to take point on any of these investigations?

I know that I'm going to regret asking this, but three are uniquely, unfortunately uniquely suited to this sort of operation who point. I feel like we've investigated the dark church so much. I'm like bored of it. I don't want the dark church. I want nothing more and tuck leans into a billion thing and he's like, I think our listeners might be bored of it too at this point. And Farrah goes, wow. Okay. All right. That's fine. We have agreed to farm out the dark church.

We will subcontract our quests yet again. What is we get? We point take point. What is that? Yeah, we lead it. Oh, we go. We go and do the investigations with like, oh, lead. Oh, well, actually now that you mention it and he, he reaches into a shirt and unfolds a collar that's been there the whole time. It puts a little time was from when you guys made me be a mayor all the time. Oh, we're wearing that for two years. I don't know how to take off a tie. I can't untie it.

It gets tighter every time. Let me let me lose that. Oh, that's so fucking funny. Okay. So kind of what is being presented to you right now is do you guys want to go do? Something else? Is there anything else that you want to do? So can I can we take one step back and just be like, what is the thing we figured out with Perel? Yeah. And then what is the thing that Farrah just offered us? And then also, what are the things that we might want to do? Uh-huh.

Here's everything that I am currently aware of. Okay. Perel just now told you that if you can find a hotspot, you might be able to poke through into whatever realm or realms the Wizards created during the Exodus potentially using that as a venue to get Perel's powers back or reconnect him with Morris or talk to someone that might be able to get Perel's yeah. Talk to fucking Wizards. We don't know what's going to happen when he gets near a hotspot. The hotspot thing is big. Yeah.

Then there is the Clearwater stuff is happening right now. Oh, the Clearwater is in town. Um, the all the Medjay stuff, the knife, the books, all that can be undertaken by the library. We've taken so much. Yeah. But she's also saying if you want to be a part of these operations, you can be. Yeah. Yeah. It's just we have resources and people that might be better at it. Thank you. The Clearwater is hoving back in. The Menders are hoving back.

I think it'd be kind of fun to either like go spy or seek out some stuff about the Clearwater. Oh, man, a stakeout. Costume change. We got to go north to the town where the Clearwater will land. Springs. No, that's late. Springs is where we are now. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Springs. That's where the library is at. Yeah. It's like the book. Yeah. So you guys could always go to the port town that Billy saw the Clearwater dock at and get information there.

And then you could have a little port town adventure. Yeah, we can have a crystal bay part to don't want to find the mayor. No mayors this time. Sorry, just like I need one break kind of one. The second you get to the town there, somebody's like hi, I'm the mayor. You look important. Get away from us. Anyone else even just like a nosy mom, just like the mailman. I don't know like a milk person, a subway sandwich artist, a farmer, a market lady, just anybody else. How do you feel about that?

Like going spy on the Clearwater? Yeah, yeah, totally. Yeah, and this is also a thing we haven't told fairy and I think, oh no, she sits down and goes, what is it? So you know about the vendors? Oh, we have had this conversation actually. Yeah. Oh good. Yeah, I'm familiar with the organization. Yeah, we let you know last time we came back to the library that they're coming back to this continent.

There's a good chance they've kind of got it out for us because of some light fecal based disrespect. We might have shown a a a a a! Okay, interesting unfleshed toilet, if you will aka a box. I don't need to know anything else. It's it's like a floater, but of a friendship. I you said that after I said I don't need to know anything else. Well, I guess here's the thing. Farrah is like, I think we're curious, but what's going on?

Like I know I'm like when are the vendors going to show up and we need to get the drop on them this time because they've gotten us the drop on us a hundred percent. Of the time in the past. I think getting the drop on them is confronting them face on. Yeah, we could just go say, hey, you're looking for us. Cool. Yeah, that's a that's a bold plan. Yeah, so fair. We have like plans a strong word. So yeah, it's a good idea. Bold good idea. We have this like opportunity to go be cool.

Do you think you could spare us for a couple days? Unquestionably anytime. Thank you for all the information that you've provided me. The library remains open to you. Well, we would maybe like to ask for one thing. Smash cut to Bulko us in Bulko Bulko's putting his goggles on. He goes, hold on little brother. We're on Black Spire on running through the yeah, it took Black Spire. Are we taking Black Spire with us? I want you to I want you to guys. I want you to so badly. Okay. He is a dragon.

What if we disguise him as a pile of hay or a fat horse, a bunch of hugs. He's a great pig. He could do a big pig. I actually think that there is a reality in which as long as you get him to suppress certain things about himself like don't use your breath weapon that kind of shit. Yeah, you might be able to pass him off as some sort of weird lizard. You know what I mean? Because he's not as big as dragons usually are. He doesn't look like he's very unique in terms of dragons.

Yeah, so I bet you could pass him off as some sort of weird beast of burden. Like if we covered up his wings and yeah, the wings would be key, but don't do we want? Okay, let me ask you guys. Do you guys want bulker with us on the next adventure? Would that be fun? Yeah, I like him, but I don't know if I want him on the whole thing. Yeah, I think Black Spire and you guys all riding him like through the desert totally makes sense. Yeah, maybe not the fastest thing in the world, but he's sturdy.

Yeah, I like that. We're all like where it shows from the side. He's like it's just like an unhealthy team. Yeah, yeah, he's been video gaming for you. Yeah. Okay. Are we taking Perel? I guess is the other question. We're leaving Perel. Yeah, I think he probably is down to stay. He's going to start looking for hot spots. He's going to research things. Yeah, he'll be pouring over books trying to trying to connect the dots like phenomena. Yeah, totally.

And he's got Aquaria so he can get Aquaria to help him out. Yeah. He wants to have like private conversations with her. He's more than excited to have like a quiet peaceful safe place to just talk to. Yeah, I know what that means. And also the mosque can do a lot of different things. Yeah. Oh my God. Gross gross. Whoa gross. Also, I was thinking about this. I think you guys have noticed that Perel is going gray. Oh, whoa, because he's aging now. Yeah, he's got to be.

He's got a bit more grain is mustache than you guys remember him having eyebrows. His eyebrows are a little gray too. Yeah, but besides that, that's all the hair. Yeah, so it doesn't really matter. Yeah. Yeah. So he started to age. He's probably yeah. Anyways. Yeah. So Perel is going to stay behind. Okay, great. Do you guys want to go talk to Black Spire? It'd be fun to do the smash cut, but you just go talk to him. Yeah. We're going on a road trip, buddy. Yeah.

And he's sitting there on his butt with his little legs sticking out in front of him and his two big paws on the ground. He's like, hell yeah. Yeah. What does that mean? It means we're going for a really long walk for several hold on in the hold on in the hot desert. Oh, great with very little black crunch. You know what? Thanks, but no thanks, but Black Spire. This means so much to us. We got a parlay with this guy. Oh, yeah. I don't know guys. This place sounds pretty lame and by this place.

I mean upstairs. My cave is pretty tight smells like shit, which means nobody bothers me. I get to eat all the black crunch and I have not been eating the shiny crunch. Oh, sick. You've been saving it. Yeah sick. We should take that so that we're, you know, rich again. Oh, just a second. And he runs, he gallops into the cave and you see in the darkness. You see light start to like kind of a shimmering shake down the walls. Whoa. And he rolls a huge huge fucking boulder. Jesus fuck.

He's like, you guys want to take all of this? Oh my God. And he's like nosing it along. Look at this. That thing is huge and I want to eat it so bad. So you guys got to decide what you want to do with it. Get this out of my cave because I am gonna eat it. I think we might have to get the librarians to help us get it out of here. Can we maybe take a couple shavings off before we give it a hand? Oh, yeah, let's embezzle a little bit of this. Yes, embezzle. Yeah.

Yeah, Billy's already going out with his little pocket knife. Yeah. Oh, tuck has an axe that breaks rock. Oh, right. That'll do. Fuck. Okay. He turns it around and he clips a bit off with the spike. What are you doing with that? Are you gonna eat it? No. Oh, okay. We're just gonna put it in our pockets. What if we bring like a lot of food? What if we bring like a lot of food? What if we bring like a lot of food? A little bit. Yeah, for me. Okay. Okay. I'll slice off a little bit for you.

All right. I slice off like a dinner plate size thing for him and you like put it into his mouth on the axe like a pizza and a pizza. Oh, no, this is for like later. These are treats for later. Come on, man. Come on. I put in my backpack. All right, whatever we just I'm just saying if we're gonna be gone for a while, we got to bring enough crunch. We will. We'll bring crunch for you. So I bring this like a dinner plate for us to sell a huge glob of drool as you're holding it.

I mean, like I'll bring this. Yeah, huge glob of burning red drool drips out of his mouth and burns on the ground. Oh, I'm sorry. You gotta watch that drool buddy. I'm so sorry. Yeah, watch where it's landing man. Ma redo that Jessica said that and looks so confused with herself. I'm so tired. I'm so sorry. I just want to hear so bad, but okay. All right. So this is black spires this is ours. We got two dinner plates. I put in my bag. Okay, that's all we need. I think okay, fine.

I'll bring another dinner. I want to take that with my spear. I take like a skittles bag worth okay in a flap black spires. Huge eyes are like like laser focused every time somebody moves some sunstone. He's like holy fuck being to does it really purposefully like when you take a dog for a walk like these treats are going in here. He puts in his pocket. Billy, do you want any before we tell Farrah about this? My pockets are full. I already got enough.

You see black spire Billy black spire gives you a huge exaggerated wink. I wink back one of these is for you big boy secret and what he says dude be quiet because he's a dragon your minds that aren't hearing it in a language you understand here like so now we could do a smash cut to Farrah's office where we're explaining that we found a fortune in her house and Bolko's standing behind us like pretty heavy.

Yeah, Balco who I was I was thinking about this and I decided he's the head of like mechanical engineering in the library. Yeah, like yeah, I can get a couple people down there and we're going to chop it up and we're going to bring it. He's he puts his arms out like full wide. He's like yeah, it's like this and then he brings him in a little bit. This big to make it smaller every person who interacts with it. It bezels she gets it's going to be like a great fruit. What is this?

Yeah, we can get a little people out there. It's like this big and yeah, it should be pretty easy. Once we chop it up. We'll just bring it to to the material sciences lab. Yeah, that sounds great fucking cool use of material sciences. Thank you and Farrah. I promised Black Spire that we would give him 10 times the amount of obsidian you what so that's I think a thing that we all have to honor because we're all about honoring our promises.

You realize that he's eating bones right like the bones of things that were a sentient beings. You're so obsessed with the past down man. Open your eyes man. Look at the present. There's a fucking dragon who found a boulder of diamond light in your building. I don't let go of the past bro. I gotta let go of the past and focus on money. She closes her eyes. I cannot believe that I didn't realize this before, but I will have people locating an alternate source of obsidian.

That would be a brilliant idea on my part. Okay, wonderful. So you're going to be taking Black Spire from the library. Yeah, I think so. He's cool with it. He seemed cool with it. Do you believe that it is wise to take a dragon to the surface and just kind of walk around with him? Do you believe that we think anything is wise or that we think about much at all? That's a great point. I have my wisdom is zero. So I believe most people are wiser than me.

I suppose considering he's such a unique specimen that with certain modifications, you could pass him off as some sort of large reptile. Cool. Put some people on it. Don't tell me what to do. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm a little testy today. I have learned four to five earth shattering facts in the last 24 hours. I believe we can whip something up. I thought we were going to do another smash cut, but to a makeover. Yeah, I like that a lot.

It is kind of a makeover scene, but it's mostly back Black Spire being fitted with a saddle harness. So he's got like a huge leather strap like around his his massive chest and it goes to like a a point that is over his wings. The saddle covers his wings. I just want to we put flaps but where his wings are so that if we need to we can pull these flaps and then let his wings out, let him stretch him out a little bit. Yeah, totally cool. And yeah, there's just a saddle on the back.

That's pretty long. It's big enough for all three of you to kind of sit one in front of the other and has attachments for like saddlebags and stuff. Cool. Yeah, this thing's sick. Thanks, Bulko. I didn't do it. I'm here for something else. What are you here for? I just kind of like this place. He's got the sunstone. It's like in his one hand. I got to take this thing to the bank. Wink. His pockets are just glowing.

Yeah, it's actually the zoologist guy that you met a while ago who's like, actually I designed the saddle. I don't know why you think Bulko would have anything to do with it, but whatever. Well, thank you. You're welcome. Looks so comfy. It is. It is extremely comfortable and considering I made it in less than six hours, I'd say. Pretty impressive. It is. I love the flaps. And the nice decorations on it. And the canopy over top is a nice touch. It's collapsible. Cool. Pretty cool. It is cool.

Alright, I still don't like you. Goodbye. Goodbye. Goodbye. Thank you. I'll see you probably next week. And yeah, so what else? We're ready to go. Right? Yeah. I guess. We've let Farrah know where we're going. Perel knows. We've got our supplies. I went to the cafeteria to get a bunch of protein shakes and like a bunch of like nuts and seeds and water and small cakes like cups of soup bread. So much food. I'm looking through all my bags. He's emptied the saddlebags and just filled it with food.

Yeah. Once you guys are out in the desert, you'll be like, where's all our clothes and water? I like the idea that Billy's in the cafeteria like stealing stuff and he's looking at a little shopping list. That's just drawings of food. Great. Then I guess you're all I guess you're ready to go. Yeah. Okay. Black Spires in the loading bay.

They've moved aside one of the sandboats so he can get on the funicular and a couple of the mechanical engineering students are reinforcing it before send him up and far as here and Perel and Perel. Yeah, Perel's here. Yeah, and they're all kind of seeing you off like in Empire Strikes Back when everybody's in the window waving. Yeah, as the Millennium Falcon flies away. Yeah. So Perel's like, all right, be careful.

I suppose are you okay with me with me staying here while you confront the menders? Oh, yeah. I mean, you're getting a lot stronger, but I mean really like what are you gonna do? Well, I mean, I'm kind of the reason that you have to confront them in the first place. Well, it's mostly the poo. And actually because they want you back it's probably better. You're not there. Yeah, I mean, yeah, good toy. Of course that makes sense. All right.

Well, I hope that you're all safe and he very awkwardly gives you all a hug. We very awkwardly pull him lift him off the ground. Yeah, he goes as you all kind of crush him and I discreetly like slip the wizard notebook because I swipe this from Farrah's desk. So I discreetly slip that into his pocket and I'm like hey, I think this belongs to you buddy.

And he touches it and he goes thank you and you saddle up on black spire and the funicular engages and click click click grind click click click grind heading out Vingos Perel. I think these are yours to from the thing and throws him a bag and he catches it and he opens it up and it's a bag full of mustaches and he looks up tears glittering in his eyes. Go nuts pal. Thank you.

And the security door slides shut midway up the funicular and then you get to the top and the bay doors open and black spire trundles out into the sand ducks down to get out of the barn and he like sniffs at the air and he kind of squints at the light. He's like, oh, put away pair of wayfarer sunglasses. He's got big goggles. Yeah, yeah, yeah. The zoologist made him goggles. We slide the goggles over his eyes and he's like, oh, they're made of obsidian. They're kind of like a carrot dangling.

They've got to be. They tried to make them out of obsidian and he ate them. Yeah, they made them out of just regular smoked glass and he just imagine his like the fitting and he is tongue just thank you and he trundles through town. A few of the quote unquote citizens of Elaine Springs watch him wide eyed as he walks by. I imagine you guys all give them like a cowboy style tip of the hat and he gets to the edge of town and he sees kind of the desert spread out in front of him.

He's like, all right, I guess it's time to go and he starts walking and then he starts walking a little bit faster and then he starts get it. He starts moving and then he's galloping. And then he's going so fast and he goes, whoa, hell yeah. And the last thing we see for this episode of Spout Lore is black spire going as he hauls ass through the Alcoly desert takes a huge leap off the top of a sand dune with his like powerful legs and the camera underneath.

Yeah, pass over blocking out the sun for a moment before he lands on the other side. And that is where we're going to end it for this week. I'm your game master. Sean O'Hara joining me is always playing Tacoma Dome. The Barbarian Abdulaziz so long everybody playing being the half elf druid Paul offers. Take care guys and playing fat Billy the halfling thief Jessica tie by everyone.

Thank you to Aaron read for our amazing intro and outro music, which is a delight to hear every single time and thank you to you are supporters from around the world. We love you so dearly.

If you want to support the show in other ways, you can find us at patreon.com slash Spout Lore where you'll get access to depending on the tier, you know, hours and hours and hours of bonus audio content live streams every month merchandise postcards original art by this point probably the Spout Lore almanac, which is supplementary world building material, which has a, a new entry every single month and a variety of other fun things.

You can find more about us online at Spout Lore most places and we'll catch you next time. And so ends the tale of adventures three who tried the best they can dumb and scared and lost baby for times abreast in revelry and though hard journey may be like a conclusion we will not leave you without a resolution return next week to hear some more whilst you commute or do your chores and for you I'd gladly Spout Lore! I miss anything. No, no, we just started right.

Cause Paul referenced a rhyme while we were talking to pearl. And then we're all like, let's write that rhyme down so we can like kind of reference it and passing conversation. But I think we're all writing different versions of it. Mm-hmm. So I modeled it off of yours. So read yours first. Okay. Yeah. The children of the inner light were made to suffer, die and fight the world. They rot to aid their flight brought brightest day to darkest night. Okay. So this is the one I wrote. Based on that.

The wizards came in dark of night, but strength of men did stop their blight. A treaty struck, but then betrayed. So men and elves had courage weighed with blood and bone and wizards. Bane. We finally did break our chains. Needs a little bit of good. No, that's good, man. Okay. So I tried to write an anti one starts. They stole from us the inner light to forge our chains, our world ignite for wizard kind, the walking blight. We take up arms. We find our might. Nice. Yeah. I wrote a kid's game.

It's like red Rover that they would play a circle circle round and round. We are wizards can't be found to going around the circle. You go around when you lose us, all is lost. So stay together at all costs. And then whoever's the designated the wizard, they have to try and break through the circle. Oh my God. That's kids game. That's really cool, man. Holy shit. I like that. Yeah. That's fucking cool as hell. That's so good. That's also a pretty fun game. Yeah. Can you read the rhyme again?

Circle circle round and round. We are wizards can't be found when you lose us. All is lost. So stay together at all costs.

Do you like Spout Lore and want spout more? Go to patreon.com slash Spout Lore, where you can get access to a bonus game called spout more Mall Brats. You know what? I don't like the theme song anymore. What? Why not? I don't want to listen to it anymore. I'm changing the theme song. What? What is it now? It's going to be. Oh my God. I'm into it. I'm with the sickness. You can't do this to me now. I'm all thrown off. You got to finish the song. Okay. I'll start again for the week. Oh man.

If he plays. Yeah. That's me too fast. There's no way I could queue it up in time. Right? Like there's no possible way. In human time. That I could do it. So I'm just going to play. Abdul wasn't looking for a podcast. I was looking. I'm not even doing it. He's poking a bunch of stuff on his iPad. I'm not pooping anything. So maybe. Boops. He's beeping and booping. I'll tell. Fuck you guys. Okay. So here's. What are you doing? I'm sorry. Okay. Here it is. Here's the thing. This is so worth it.

No. Okay. So here's what just happened is I tried to play sabotage by the beast. Yes. Uh huh. Uh huh. But. I knew it. I knew it. But. Uh. It was definitely playing on Aaron's iPhone. And I'm pretty sure she was trying to get Khalil down for a nap. Oh no. She was definitely playing like a nice song to get him to go to sleep. And then you played your joke annoying loud. And then probably what turned on was. Wow. Oh my God. Followed by Khalil. Wow. Oh. Oh. And now the themes are great. Shut up.

So here I say This is the adventure that is with the sir Tuck is the brute, he knows not his home He loves to sing and fight Fingers half-elf, he shifts his shape And wields a spear with great might Billy's a thief, his tiny size Does mask the largest heart Best and brightest they may not be But their friendship outweighs their smarts So gather round, friends And listen close For the tale's about to start Hello, everybody, and welcome to Spout Lore. I'm your game master, Sean O'Hara.

And joining me as always, playing Tacoma Dome, the barbarian, Abdul Aziz. Hello, everybody. Playing Ving, the half-elf druid, Paul Oppers. Hi, how's it going? And playing Fat Billy, the halfling thief, Jessica Tai. Hi, everyone. When last we left our heroes, they returned. To the Margani Library, following an absolutely barn-burning fight with Medjay and threat untold, Roth, who was overcome by the teamwork of our three heroes and a number of differing poisons and drugs. Oh, yeah.

The party incapacitated Roth and returned to the Margani Library to return the book that Billy stole from the library. Infuriating master librarian, Farah Margani. And also to deliver their new prisoner, Roth, who may or may not become a problem. Mm-hmm. Following that, Tuck and Ving engaged in some sort of unasked-for romantic rivalry. Unasked-for, but appreciated. By? The audience.

And then we did a little bit of a study break, and everybody kind of took to the library, to take advantage of one of the benefits of having access to this repository of information, which is if you spend a whole day studying, you get a 10-plus on a Spout Lore. Mm-hmm. And what we learned during those spelt lores was, Jessica? We opened the artist joke puzzle, and inside was a seed for the Tree of Knowledge. Mm-hmm.

And what was written on the seed were basically kind of growing instructions for it. So cool. Mm-hmm. And it started, it started germinating a little bit. Yeah. So Billy is in possession of an extremely rare and extremely important seed for a tree that contains the collected knowledge of druids. Mm-hmm. What was the result of Ving's studying? I don't remember. You also took a sample of Roth's tattoos. Oh, Roth.

Yes, of Roth's tattoos, and we found out with LightSight, put it under the microscopic system they have, and found out that it was a tree. And it was a tree. And it was a tree. And it was a tree. And it was a tree. And it was a tree. And it was a tree. And it was a tree. And it was a tree. And it was animal blood, but the mixture of all the blood from the animals that were in the ritual. Yeah, that they stabbed. Yeah, it's the shapeshifter blood. Shapeshifter blood mixed with ghost root. Mm-hmm.

And some sort of other ritual. Yeah. And what we learned from that is that the Medi in their attempt to chain the elements to them kind of put themselves in this very dangerous halfway state between the spirit world and here, which Ving believes, eventually will kill them and knows that Roth is probably in extreme pain all the time because his arms are under, his arms especially are under tremendous strain. All the different forms are pulling in every different direction. Yeah. Exactly.

And Tuck. Tuck went and talked to Farah about the white coin and all the demon possessions that were happening. What did she say to me? She said that she thinks the coins may or may not, this is all a working theory, they may be used by some force to attract people that are candidates, good candidates for demonic possession. Oh, okay. She doesn't know if you found it randomly, if perhaps you are a candidate for demonic possession. Uh-huh.

And the idea is perhaps the coins themselves contain a fragment of an icon. Oh, yeah. Or a fragment of the outer dark, were we saying? Something like that. Yeah. Yeah. And after this, study sesh with Farah, Tuck was walking through the library and was stopped by a gruff voice that turned out to belong to Fatim, erstwhile bully and former member of the Lightguard who asked if he and Tuck could talk. Okay.

So as soon as I hear Fatim's voice, I knee jerk, grab a table from next to me and throw it at him. And then I start running at him. Oh my God. Okay. Hack and slash, I guess. Yeah. Shit. Yeah. Would you roll? Fuck. Five. Five. Failure. So mark a point of experience. Hell yeah, I'm gonna get to level seven so soon. So you're in a corridor. So you grab a tiny little side table that was in this corridor and throw it at Fatim and you start charging at him.

And you see as the table sails through the air towards him, he just punches it and shatters it. And by the time you get to him, he's ready and he does that sort of Hercules, style grab where he grabs both your fists and just stops you dead in the hallway. Yeah. And it's like, no, I just want to talk to you. You've said that so many times. So I go to knee him in the balls. All right. We're doing a fight scene now. Two to six plus strength again. Seven. Seven on this one. Okay. Yeah.

So you deal your damage, I guess. Okay. With D10. Oh my gosh. Is that six or nine? That's a nine. Nine. Yes. Yeah. Oh yeah. Shit. Oh my God. Oh my God. So you knee him. There's a little seven. You knee him and he goes, and he shoulder checks you and tries to push you away. Roll a D10. One. So yeah, he just shoulder checks you and you don't feel it because he is reeling from the fact that you hit him in the ball. Yeah. I've got victim rage. He's just like, stop. I just want to talk to you.

This isn't a trick. I can't trick anybody. You just shoot me in the nards. And then, so I get on top of him and I hold him down and I'm just like, okay, tell me what you want to say. Can we, I don't, it's going to take a while. Go ahead. Right here. Yeah. Do it with me holding you down. Oh my God. Okay. Oh God. I wanted to say that I'm sorry. It's not. I'm just, I'm sorry. There's more to it. Tuck. Let's go. Can we go like sit somewhere? Sure. And he gets up and he's like holding his balls.

It's like, my God, we can go somewhere that has ice. Okay. I guess the cafeteria. He's the answer for everything. For you three. It's always like, yeah, it's pretty good. So you're sitting at a bench at the end of a long table in the cafeteria. There are people having various meals and Fatima is sitting there with a huge bag of ice just all over because both of you guys are massive. So this bag of ice is like a pillow. He's just like, oh my God, did you really have to go right for my nards?

I mean, it was a knee jerk reaction. Literally. Yeah. Okay. Okay. Okay. This is not easy. I don't know how to talk about it. I just like, I admit that I have not been a good person, but you don't know what it's like having to work for years and years at the right hand of someone who is like manipulating your emotions. And now that I, now that that's gone. I'm really trying to figure out like who I am and who that was. You know what I mean? It's been pretty bad for the last couple of years.

Like for you or in McCall? Just in general, I guess. Kind of everything. It was you. We thought you died. What? You just, when you left, nobody knew what happened to you. Well, nobody cared. Nobody cared about any of us. That was the point. And when you left, we thought that you died. I, and you know what?

I, there was a, there was a long time there where I was, you know, I thought maybe that I was responsible and you know, every once in a while you I'd see in a freight and I think, is that tuck? And then I saw you in crystal Bay and. Okay. I just got so mad cause I was like, he just left. You just left. We all stayed here. You got away. I'm not good at explaining this. I sang the tolling for you. Oh, whoa. Why did you think you did it? What? Why did you think you did it?

Well, I was like, I was really, really scared. I was like, I'm going to die. I'm going to die. I'm going to die. Really shitty to you. And I thought maybe that, you know, the way that I treated you caused you to kind of, you know, I don't know. Maybe you slipped up one night and you got stuck on, on a stone road at night. I don't know what happened to you, but I thought that, you know, maybe I had something to do with it. What happened to everyone else? What do you, what usually happens?

Some of us made it. Some of us didn't. I joined up the light guard the second I could. And spent, you know, whatever the last 10, 12 years, just kind of doing this. But, uh, not everybody was as lucky as me. Not everybody was as big and as strong as me and is valuable to an organization like that. Some people just, he kind of makes a gesture. That's just like nothing. Um, I'm sorry. I didn't tell you I was leaving.

And he like, he, he doesn't, it's like, he kind of like, he gets angry for a second, not angry, but he's like confused. What are you? I'm not saying that I, I'm not saying I want you to apologize to me. I know, but I, I, I, I, I didn't know it mattered. It does. It doesn't, it didn't matter. That's not what I, I'm sorry. I didn't know it mattered. It didn't matter. I don't whatever. Okay. All right, cool. So are we, what are we good? What do we do? I don't know.

I get, well, I mean, I guess we just kind of like live and then try to beat each other up less. Uh, I guess that's how casual acquaintances slash old friends, uh, uh, friends behave. All right, that's fine. What are you going to do next? I don't know. Like, what are you, are you going to stick around in the library? Are you going to, nah, nah, probably not. This isn't really my scene. Too many books. I know it's so quiet. They just want to read and drink tea all the time. Fuck. It sucks.

It does. People yell at you for not being quiet. Yeah. Doesn't make sense. Some of us, we can't be quiet. Some of us have huge chest cavities. Some people are just loud. We're screaming at each other. And the cat that turns around. This is a cafeteria. Please. This isn't the library. Shut up. I'm trying to have tea and read. This is the loud zone. You want to come over here and tell me to be quiet? Yeah. You come over here. Tell us to be quiet.

Closes the book, walks in with his tea, quietly sipping. God, I hate this place. Fuck. It sucks. So I'm probably going to go eventually. I don't know when, but, I don't know. Maybe I leave McCall entirely. I mean, there's a lot of world out there. That's what I keep hearing. And people love it when I, people used to love how big I was. Fucking loved it when I would break shit for them. So there's always work. There's always break shit kind of work out there. Well, that's good to know, but yeah.

All right. Well, I'm going to go. And he like pushes himself up off the table. So we're cool, right? Yeah. Yeah. So this is whatever. Is this fine? We're fine. Yeah, we're fine. Fine. Wow. Damn. You just got to apologize to people. Holy shit. Yeah, it's really easy. Fuck. All right. Well, I'm going to go apologize to some other people now. Oh, cool. And he starts, he sees the guy that's leaving with his book and his team. He's like, Hey man, wait up. Runs away faster. The guy starts sprinting.

It charges after him. It's just this, this like screaming mad dash through the library. He's like, come back here. He like knocks over a whole bookcase. He's like, come back. So what are Ving and Billy up to? Oh yeah. Ving's been keeping pretty, uh, hefty. What do you call it? Correspondence. Oh, Shia. Yeah. He's been sending, uh, like martial arts, like, uh, uh, like some of the forums and stuff like that. Like she's been cool. They're keeping up with her training. Over distance. Cool. Yeah.

And she's been sending you a coded, like they just seem like letters, but you've, you guys have determined a way to like read between the lines and it's her explaining, uh, kind of how things are going in the criminal underworld of McCall. So she has explained that. Yeah. She's got cliffside pretty well locked down.

The jackals have recruited to the extent that there aren't really any gangs that are comfortable pushing into that area, but she is dealing, uh, with a pretty powerful organized crime family, like traditional, like it's got a patriarch. Yeah, exactly. A godfather style, uh, criminal enterprise in stepside that is proving, uh, pretty difficult. So she is, uh, starting to plan moves into stepside, but this, uh, it's a camel or not a camel. Sorry. It's a centaur. It's a regular camel.

It's a regular camel with an eye patch. Uh, no, it's a centaur. Uh, it's a, it's a, it's a, it's a, it's a, it's a, it's a, it's like their front and it's an organized crime syndicate. Whoa. Yeah. Center's a great mob bus too. It's a real Tommy Supreme. Eat more kind of guy. Tommy Supremo. He also owns a pizza joint. You know what? His name's Tommy Supremo, the leader of the centaur family. Cause it's like a mob thing, right? They don't have aliases. They just use their names.

Well, that's, that could be an alias. Tommy Supremo. Yeah. Tommy Supremo. Tommy Supremo. A creator of the Supremo pizza. I saw a bunch of ducks one time. It really fucked me up. I'm seeing a therapist about it right now. A bunch of ducks killed my family. I had to go see a therapist. Uh, yeah. So it's, uh, Tommy Supremo, head of this centaur, uh, organized crime family who does have a chain of pizza places. Uh, it's not a trading company. It's a pizza place. Yeah.

And all of their, uh, stuff is run out of there. They smuggle a lot of things in and out of the city. Yes. He has contact. He has flat things, flat things in pizza boxes. That's how they do it. They smuggle things in. Cause he has a lot of contacts in the merchant trade and they transport them through the city via pizza delivery. Oh, so cool. But also very funny for them to have to deal with like problems where, or stuff that they're trying to deliver. That's larger than two inches in height.

Sometimes they'll stack boxes and cut holes. I know. Like more than one book. I don't know. That's the move. Uh, yeah. So, so that's kind of how things are going with her. She hasn't even just like thought about moving into the lower ward and you get the idea. She is very concerned about even trying to move into the lower ward where the rich people are. Yeah. Why?

Cause as far as she can tell, there are criminals in the upper reaches of society and they are, they have so much more in terms of resources and they are much more cutthroat. Oh, I just thought of one of those cutthroats. What's that? The barber from that salon. Oh, the perfumer's guild guy. The, the one that Ving met. Yeah. Actually, uh, Oh, that's a perfect cover for somebody who's going to cut your throat. Totally. Going for a shave. Hell yeah. Yeah.

He pretends to be this like kind of doting like servant that's like, allow me to perfume you and style your hair. But he's a, yeah. Hardcore criminal boss. Was Sweeney Todd. Yeah, totally. Okay, cool. I'll, yeah, that's sweet. Um, yeah. So that's kind of how things are going with Shia. And you've been sending her like mostly martial, art stuff or you, have you been talking to her about like personal things?

I think mostly the martial art things and she's been distancing herself from the rich family. Yeah. She's pretty much like just left the Siddell place, but she mentions that cash is still staying there. He's taken over her lot. What cash is still living with the Siddells. What a permissive family that is. I like the idea that his parents also moved in. So he's living with his family. He's living with his parents again, but in somebody else's parents. Yeah.

He's trying to pretend that he's like this rich, like a influential person on this balcony, like stunning himself, drinking cocktails. And his mom's like cash come inside, pick up your clothes, honey. Uh, sweet. And what's Billy been doing? Um, probably playing with that seed. Oh yeah. Yeah. Anything that he's learned from the seed in particular? Um, definitely likes wet stuff. So, um, so what kind of wet stuff is Billy been giving the seed? Just like water. Yeah.

I just, he's been like putting it in cups and stuff. Yeah. Like he's, he's grabbed a lot of cups from the cafeteria. It's like signs. There's cups of water, cups of water. And he just like kind of just jiggles it around. Nice. Like, yeah. Grow. Yeah. Do anything. Come on. Logan. Maybe Billy, he's done playing with the seed in the water cup. So he takes the seed and puts it in his pocket, goes and looks for Ving. Hey buddy, do you get that seed still? Yup. Give me the moist. Oh yeah. Attaboy.

Squelch. Do you want to look at it? I sure do. Oh, that's really grown much as it. No, I don't think it likes it here. Ving whispers at the seat. You're doing great buddy. And tuck arrives at this scene. Oh, it's we're talking to seeds again. Why are you always so mad about it? I'm not mad. I'm fully supportive of this. Hey, say something to the seed pal. Yeah. You look you. Whoa, buddy. Whisper. Whoa. Sorry. You know, I have a hard time with whoa, buddy. You've been working out recently.

Looking strong. You're like, I'm not fucking done. This is fucking Christ, dude. I'm engaging with this weird thing that you guys are doing. Please do. Oh yeah. You've been doing squats recently. I could tell your glutes are popping right out of that pot. No, I'm not done. Oh, what's that? Oh, look, let me turn you around. Ooh, look at those tries. So defined. No, dude, what the fuck? Looks like a fucking arrowhead on your back. Oh, it's so fucking defined.

Just pointing right at those juicy gloobies. That's what I call glutes when they're extra. You hear what are you guys doing? Oh, hi, Pearl. Hi, we're just talking to the seed. Oh, you're talking to the seed again. Say something to the fucking seed. Hey, little guy, I'm really proud of you. I know it's been tough because you're inside that artichoke for so long, but I think that you can do it. I'm not going to lie. I'm not going to lie. I'm not going to lie.

I know reclaiming power that you thought lost to you is a really difficult proposition, but I think that. Dude, don't put your own stuff on the seat. I'm just really proud that you've been trying so hard. Your breath fucking reeks. Shut up. Where are you getting hamburger helper? Nobody's making it anymore. I'm making it myself. Why aren't you telling me this? I've, I've been a hamburger helper so long.

I've been like this the last time, the last time I told you about my, my under the bed hamburger helper. You hamburger helper. I'm like, you think you're going to make a hamburger? Help yourself to way too much of it. You're being a hamburger keeper. You think I can stop myself? What goes? Hamburger helper? You can't even stop yourself. It's so good. It's so good. So salty. I had a fucked up conversation with better. He said, sorry for being me. Oh my God. I'm so glad you had the breakthrough.

Brill hugs you and he said, you're going to have to take a break. You're going to have to take a break. You're going to have to take a break. You're going to have to take a break. Sobbing into your chest. And then as Tug hugs Perel, he like dips his hand into one of his housecoat pockets and pulls a bunch of hamburger helper out and hands it to Billy. Billy takes it and like nods. Thank you. And eats it like nothing happened. Except for the smear of cheese and meat sauce on your face. Yeah.

Perel wipes his tears. Wow, guys. I really needed that. Thank you. No problem. You know, thinking about it, we should probably work on getting yours and or Ving's powers back. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I'm feeling strong. I'm feeling healthy. I feel like I've recovered enough. We could, when we go back to the city and track this magi fucker down and give him the old one-two. Well, yeah. Ving, do you even want your shape-shifting abilities back? I mean, I haven't been missing it.

And since I know how it was taken, I don't know if it's mine to get back. Huh. Well, maybe the knife could have something to do with getting Perel's powers back. Oh, yeah. I don't know if it works the same with spirits and druids and magic. But it might. It could. Yeah, and there is definitely power imbued in the knife. Maybe. That's what Ark said, at least. Especially when mixed with the ghost root. And if you're powering… Powers are about, like, shifting your form.

And my magical focus was about… It might not be able to get you your magic back, but it could get you powers similar to your magic. Right. Because you were, like, a transfiguration dude or whatever. Transmutation, but yes. And Tuck just picks up one of Perel's books and throws it in a garbage bin. Out of spite. Don't fucking correct me. Don't misrepresent my work. So, wait. Yeah. Holy… Shit. Fuck. And he starts, like, he's swearing too much. He's like, Jesus fucking shit. Fuck.

I could just, if I just had the knife, I could just give myself powers. Well, hold on. We don't know this. Well, I mean, it's a good working theory, right, Billy? Maybe. I mean, but what kind of ritual did you go through when you became a wizard? Oh, yeah. I… That's a hard question to answer. I guess you don't have to. No, I feel… I guess it's… We've known each other for a long time now, and you all don't really know much about my past, do you? Don't know, don't care. Oh. Okay, well…

Wait, wait, wait. What? I care, and I, like, get some throw pillows, and I make a nice couch. I'm like, sit down with me, you guys. I sit down. I sit down with Billy. And I put Billy on my lap, and I put a pillow behind, between my ripped hard abs. Yeah, definitely. And Billy's back, because he complains about how lumpy it is. Sometimes. Thank you. You know that your muscles make me sore sometimes. Because of how hard they are. Thing's too bony, and he's too muscly.

I can't ride on anybody's shoulders. God! I, um… Yeah, I became a wizard, um… Suddenly, is how I would describe it. One day I wasn't, and then one day I was. And, um… Everything was different from then on out, and, uh, my old life was lost to me. It took me a while to get my feet under me, but then I had to make do with this new life. And it was, it's good. It's a good, it was a good life. I guess. What's the last thing you remember about your old life? Oh, I remember all of it.

Did I ever tell you guys that I grew up in, uh, in the Riverways Principality? No. No? Yeah. You stayed close to home. I did, yeah. That's where I built my tower. Um, afterwards. Uh, but… I… Alright, you know, I'll just say it. I, uh, I had a wife, I had kids. And, uh, sometime, I think I was in my early to mid-forties, um, was when it happened. Uh, I was a ferryman. That was kind of my job, as I was away from home a lot. I was working a ferry up and down the rivers.

I was away from home, uh, one day, and I got my powers, and, uh, I, uh, wasn't able to control them, and, uh, a town paid the price for that. Oh my god. And then I couldn't go home. So, you know, and then, that was that. Well, that's really vague. So, like, what happened to the town? Um, Flash Frozen? Whoa. Yeah. And do you remember how you got your powers? Like, did you, like, touch some thing, or eat something? Do you, like… What? At least I'm trying to figure it out. Yeah, no, Billy.

Uh, Thaumatological Theory states that there are a number of ways that people can be wizards. Theory the first. Theory the first is you're born a wizard. Theory the second is, um, you just become one by random happenstance, almost, and that's what happened to me. Some cosmic calculation, that I am not privy to, took place, and I was the solution. What, uh, like, what did it feel like? Oh, it hurt so much. Physically? Physically, yes. You've seen me work magic in the past.

Um, my physiology isn't strictly human. Yeah. Yeah, and it started human. So, the process of becoming a wizard, uh, becoming a person capable of manipulating Thaumic energy is excruciatingly painful. And the older, you are, the more it hurts, because the more use your body is to being the body that it is. So, it's just random. That's my understanding. Aquaria was, um, for example, she was, uh, just created, she just, uh, she just began her life as a wizard the way that she was.

That's how she always was. What? No. What? No. No. I know you've all got questions, but I have time to answer them all. We're all raising our hands. Yeah. You can go first. Billy, your hand's raised, though. You can't raise your hand. Bing and Tuck are fighting now. Okay, I'll go first. Yeah, Billy? Okay, so, what about Morris Wadge? How did he become a wizard? Morris was born, um, born a wizard. Born of human parents. And he was a wizard to begin with.

So, he had a longer period of time to harness his abilities. Is that why he was such a better wizard than you? Well, um, hold the fuck on. Yeah, that fanny pack was wide off the chain. And it felt like it was just something that he did in his spare time. Oh my god. It was so effortless. And the drawer was so comfortable. That was not, it was not effortless. It took for fucking ever. Whereas, like, your whole thing was frogs. My whole thing was creating an entire sentient species.

And then Bullywugs was the result of that. Yeah. How many sentient species have you made, Tuck? Shut the fuck up. And then he lifts the axe. You did. Dude, this thing did that. He's got you there, pal. But I gave them sentience with my love. Oh my god. Spirit stuff is cheating. It's not the same thing. Excuse me? Billy makes sentient species all the time. Whenever he plays with little grass figurines. Yeah, it's honestly pretty easy. Oh my god. I shit out a sentient being this morning.

For coffee. Ugh. Okay. I have another question. Uh-huh. Put my hand up. Yeah. Yeah. When you say that it was a cosmological, cosmological, cosmic event, did it come from the sky? Did something come down? That is a question that many a wizard has asked over the generations. And it's kind of just like, what's a good way to… Actually, I can see Billy picking up some dice. He wants to Spout Lore. Yeah, 2d6 plus intelligence, Billy. Oh, shit. Seven. Seven. Do I have any intelligence? No. Seven.

All right. It's the same. Yeah, it'll be nine no matter what. Fuck. Yeah. Can two people add? Shit. No, we can't. No. Can I add one… Nope. …point for being… Can you take a… So smart. Yeah. Bet you wish you fucking moved your stats around now when we leveled up. I do. I do. You promised everybody that we would never get one intelligence. I know. So once I… When I asked…

Paul, if he wanted to move any stats around for Vang, I was staring at the zero underneath his intelligence, and I was like, Willing it to be one. Please, please, please, please. You were like, No, I'm good. I was like, Fuck. He's a sage with no intelligence. I know. It's the best. So interesting, but not useful. He's trying to think of an analogy, and he's like, Okay, what's the best way to describe it?

You know how sometimes, like, on a side, a sidewalk, a paving stone, like a flower will grow from the crack. Yeah. So for that to happen, a seed had to end up somehow in the soil of the crack. Water had to somehow water it while the sun hit it in just the right way for that flower to grow. Yeah. And that's all kind of random, right? No, it follows the theory of nature. Okay. Not a great analogy. You know how, like, when I make my under the bed hamburger, helper, Yeah. It needs. Yes, I am.

There are ingredients. There's the hamburger. There is the helper, but it needs to be, like, just the perfect amount of musty in the room to kind of get that moisture attention. And it needs to be like the right amount of time, which is different every time you have to constantly check on it. And then eventually it is under the bed hamburger helper. You know that how it's kind of random how that happens. Well, yes, because you don't have a lot of cooking skill. Mm hmm. Mm hmm. Okay.

You're absolutely right. And he's like not being mean at all. He's just he's like, yes. And Perel doesn't take that personally. He's like, correct. Exactly what I'm getting at. Mm hmm. That's why it's such a special thing. The under the bed hamburger helper, because it doesn't work out most of the time. And when it does, it's a gift from the universe. Well, I am the hamburger of the helper. Yes. Yes. There you go. Do you understand? Do you understand?

There was no choice made to make the hamburger helper under the bed, but I became the hamburger with the help of the helper. So what's the helper then? Tuck says, engaging in the analogy. And what's the must under the bed? Yeah. These are all great questions. There are theories abounding, but nobody knows. And why do why is there sometimes just tissues in the hamburger helper? Oh, that's a really crusty kind of tissue. Sometimes I find. Oh, my God. Who can we talk to about this? Farrah.

Farrah knows more. Farrah knows everything. All of the people that you could talk to about this subject are dead. That can't be true. We're in a library of internal knowledge. Yeah. And Aquaria is still alive. Wait, is Morris dead? I actually don't remember if you guys even ever talked to Perel about Aquaria being alive. No. Yeah. We always had the wizard notebook. Oh, right. So he knows that we're aware of Aquaria. Aware of Aquaria.

And he would have just assumed that it was because of the notebook that we could see. I see. Yeah. You guys never actually mentioned that you met her. We've never talked to him about meeting her in the tower. Oh. We haven't? Really? And maybe it happened off screen, but maybe it didn't. Yeah. Right. What the fuck do you mean Aquaria is alive? We met her. She's breathing. She was in her chamber. She survived? Yeah, kind of. In a way. Yeah. What? Do you tell me everything?

Well, there was a dumb frog room full of stupid puzzles. That's not… Okay. All right. So you were there for sure then. Yeah. Super easy thing to get through. So easy. Oh, man. But then there was Morris's wild room. That was inside the maze. That was fucking… There was almost literally no way out of it. Did you meet that stupid fucking accordion? Oh, God. Yeah. The golem. That was creepy. Oh, my God. Embarrassing. So scary. And then we found some fun books. Yeah.

We found some books in Aquaria's room, including some of your notebooks. Yeah. We found your notebook. That's what… I think Farrah has it now. Why did none of you ever tell me this? I don't know. I forgot. You forgot to mention that one of my best friends in the world survived when I thought that she was dead. We thought you were the one that put her there. Yeah. Oh, my God. Oh, my God. Where? Where? Where? In the Sea of Graves? In the Sea of Graves. I have to go. In the Moss Tower.

I have to go there. Why? Because she is… And he's pointing at the three of you. You know? Wait. Can we give him… I want to give him the moss that we got from Aquaria's Tower. Oh, the moss. The moss. I have the moss. Can we give him the moss? He can talk with the moss and commute with the moss. I can see what… Yeah. So you have… Has he seen this moss before? I don't think so, because it's… It's like in… It's in a little crystal window. In his chest. In his chest. In his chest.

He may have just never really like… I mean, I have moss in my arms. He doesn't know that it's Aquarius. Okay. Yeah. She… She… She gave me this. And his little chest cave opens up. A piece of crystal kind of decrystallizes. You know, it goes back all crystal-y. Mm-hmm. And he pulls out the little chunk of blue moss and says, Here, this is a piece of Aquaria. And he lets you put it in his hand. And he very shakily… His hands are like vibrating.

And he's like, And he is just like holding it in his hand. And you can see it like spread out around his finger, kind of in a ring shape. Oh. And he stares out into the middle distance for a second. And he goes, Aquaria. And he just sinks down onto the floor. Oh. And you can see tears in his eyes. Oh. Uh-oh. Oh, no. I put my blue blanket over him. And he is just crying. But he… He's smiling. Oh. You can hear him talking. Oh. Yeah. He's communicating with her right now.

So the moss is connecting him with her? Mm-hmm. Whoa. Oh, my God. Maybe he's breathing deep like she was. Yeah. Yeah. You can hear the like… And he's just crying. He's gonna be like this for a while. Yeah. Can we hear what… Some of the stuff he says? I think this has been such a huge emotional shock for him just in a short amount of time. And he's right now, he's just sobbing. Aw. Maybe we should go… Yeah. And give him privacy. Mm-hmm. And then check back in with him later. Yeah.

That makes sense. Okay. So you leave Perel alone to his reunion. You can hear the quiet sobs like through the door to his quarters. And then like every once in a while, a soft laughter. Yeah. Oh, yeah. Reminiscing. All right. So should we… Like Perel doesn't seem to know much about like… The wizard stuff. But Farrah might. Because she was… Yeah. Remember last season, Tuxes? Back in the spring, Farrah was…

When she gave that talk about magic, she said that she was like the foremost scholar on wizard stuff in the world. Did she say that? Yeah. Fuck. That's good to know. It's a great idea. Mm-hmm. And we gave her Perel's journal. So she's probably like read it a few times. Yeah. She's probably been studying. Yeah. Yeah, probably. Probably should get that back for Perel. Plus, she might have an idea about the knife that was used on Roth. Mm-hmm. And me. It's a good idea. Yeah.

Might be a little bit outside her wheelhouse, but definitely worth asking. If studies of like wizard history and thaumaturgy are her like focuses, she still has like a gajillion minors, right? Like she's… Yeah. A master librarian. Yeah. So you find Farrah… What time of day is it? It's the morning. It's the morning. It's the morning. It's the morning. It's the morning. It's the morning. It's the morning. It's the morning. It's the morning. It's the morning.

She's actually giving a talk right now. Oh, yes. Cool. Shit. I shouldn't have said that. Yes. I was just like, what's a thing that she hasn't been doing for a while? But yeah, she's giving a talk in one of the primary auditoriums. Oh, and it's that thing that you see in movies sometimes where it's like someone like walks in and sits at the back of the room. Yeah. Or it's like you hear the door creak open. Yeah. And she's mid-sentence and she's got… There's rows of seating carved out.

That looks like this was, you know, maybe a sort of quarry situation when this was still a mine system. I like that. Yeah. So they're carved out in like a tiered shape and she's at the bottom facing the students, but she has one of those sunstone projectors and it's projecting images onto the wall. Whoa. And she's talking about… What's she talking about? Within the realm of, let's say, thaumaturgy. Is it basically a chance for us to cheat a spell or… Yeah, exactly. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Magic is bestowed upon wizards. Yeah. I know. How the cosmos… Yeah. Aligns. Aligns in such a way to create… It mixes with the environment. Shut up. Okay. How do you get wizards their magic back? Getting their magic… Wizards getting their magic back and how to do it right now. Yeah. For dummies. For dummies. You're going to need the Thumb Dumper. Okay. Okay.

I don't want to be the guy that like pulls the rug out from under you after I just said a thing. It might be too convenient if she's giving a talk.

Talk on thaumaturgy so what's an interesting subject that she could be giving a talk on maybe giants like giant history yeah the history of the giant empires that would be cool or dragons maybe just because of all this new stuff that they found out oh it might be a talk on like dragon biology now that they've had a chance to study black spire for a while oh yeah shit yeah like they're presenting new information what's touching touching you as far ah um the dragon thing I think probably makes the most sex sense uh yeah I said sex what do you want well now I want sex I know why do you think I said it we're all horny paul we've been stuck in this fucking house for hours we're all for one hour for one hours uh yeah so dragon biology she's giving a talk on dragon biology um and the mutable nature of dragons based on their uh mineral intake and environments yeah so she's actually projecting onto the wall a very detailed surprisingly detailed biology diagram of black spire oh and you can see him laid out um you know it's like a side view it's like a top down and then it's like him with his legs uh spread out what the fuck they weren't texas everybody stops and turns like everybody stops and turns and turns and turns and turns and turns and turns and turns and turns and turns and turns and turns and turns and turns and turns and turns and turns You hear that sound of like two dozen bodies shifting at once.

Sorry, fuck. Tuck's face goes so red. And Farah just, she's wearing little glasses and she just adjusts them a little bit and looks at you. And Tuck shrinks down in his chair a little bit and points at Ving. And he says, please continue. Thank you. And she continues talking. And she's saying, we discovered this specimen that had hatched in another location but found itself in a giant tomb for, we believe, upwards of a hundred years.

And in that time, it fed extensively and exclusively on the bones of the giants interred within. Over time, that mineral intake and the lack of size in its environment led to it developing a smaller but stockier physiological state. Pretty. And I just, it's kind of fucked up for her to like show those nudie pics of Black Spire and then call him fat in front of everybody. Well, you're saying it like it's a bad thing. No, Billy, no. Obviously, I don't mean it like a bad thing.

But I mean, I've never announced that you are fat in front of a group of 200 people. I just don't think that he would want to be splayed out and displayed. Yeah, you can see his balls-os. Look at him, he looks upset in those photos. You hear that? You hear, shh. You shush, shh. You shush. And there's like a 17-year-old librarian in front of you with a notebook going, shh. And I go, tell me your name. No, tell me. Shut up. And I put my foot up on the back of his chair.

I'm like, tell me your name. Why? I just don't want to know. I'm trying to learn. I don't fucking care. Tell me your name. Fuck. Learn with ears, not with your shush. No. Come on, tell me your name. Okay. Okay. Fuck you. Fuck you. That's my name. Okay, fine. And then Tuck pushes his leg forward and reclines with his legs up on the back of this guy's chair. And he pushes back against it. Doesn't move it at all, of course, because you're literally 10 times this guy's size.

The Tuck is, his first time in a classroom, he's immediately found the perfect role as a bully. He's like, oh, this is what classrooms are. I'm at the back of the room. I can't believe Fatim was so mean to me. All that. I'm at time. I just got closure. So now I get to pay it forward. Closure. Oh, that's what closure means. And this kid will just like scoot forward in his seat and try and like hunch over and continue writing notes. And this talk will continue. I want to ask questions. Oh, yeah.

Okay. So what she's saying right now, because you guys listen to Tuck bully a kid for a little bit, is she is saying most incredibly, one of the more, striking changes in this giant's physiology is, uh, it's, oh, fuck. Giant? I'm sorry. I believe you mean dragon, madam. Please continue. You see her breathe in very deeply, calmingly. One of the more striking changes in this dragon's biology is, uh, how its environment affected the application of its breath weapon.

Whereas most dragons tend to expel superheated air, or flame. This one is capable of storing molten stone derived from its mineral intake in a specialized sack inside of its belly that it can then expel in an offensive and defensive ways. Is Billy going to ask a question? Billy wanted to, but he's all embarrassed now. No, ask Billy, Billy, ask your question. There's no silly questions. Just stupid people. It's okay to ask questions. I actually, Jessica don't know what to ask it. Oh, that's fine.

Reflex. Yeah. You lift your hand up. And her goes, yes, nothing. And most of this is something that tuck and, and Ving might notice most of the librarians that turn around and see Billy, they go, ah, like they get like excited. Billy's become in the last few months, like sort of a minor celebrity in the library because people think he's really cute and he's a fairy. So they're like, interest. This is amazing. Yeah. Yeah. Are people been like asking you, probably? Oh yeah. Oh my God.

And he doesn't even realize it. Billy's been the subject of study for months. Yeah. Slides of splayed Billy up here. Oh, probably. Oh, yeah. It's it cuts to a slide another time. And it's a picture of Billy, like, ha doing poses in the shower. When you, you know, when you're like, uh, have the towel on your butt, when you're scrubbing your butt, just doing like little dances, like for all intents and purposes, he appears to be a regular, if not precocious and very, very, very, very, very, Yes.

Billy. Hi Farrah. I have a question. My question is where do dragons come from? That's an interesting question. Uh, from what we have discovered, dragons have been found and recorded all over the world. Do you guys want me to talk or do you want to do this sex? Joe Farrah says that at me cause I'm laughing. I'm like, sorry, big as doing a, penis in vagina motion at me. Vink stands up, sorry, and he shows the class to be demonstrative. I would say 20% of them laugh when you do the sex move.

20% not bad. Pretty good. I high five them. There's dozens. You are more than welcome to audit this talk, but if you choose to be disruptive, I'd have to ask you to leave. And there goes Farrah. I'm sorry. I'm genuinely sorry. Tell us more about his molten sack or whatever. We'd moved on from that. Thank you. Please pay attention or leave.

From what we have discovered, dragons, of course, have not been cited in great numbers for over a hundred years, but they have been recorded and found all over the world. But from what we can tell, most dragon species are indigenous to a mountain range far to the north known as the White Cloud Mountains. Wow. And perhaps a thousand years ago, trade in dragon eggs became quite popular, which led to populations across the globe. Yes. That is terribly interesting. Ving here. Druid. Elementalist.

And he puts his little glasses on Sage. Takes his glasses off. Oh my God. I was wondering. Yes, we all know of the dragon eggs in distribution, but where does the eggs come from? From whence what hole from whence? So there's eggs. Yes. Where are these eggs coming from? Dragons. So they come out of clack them. Is it much like a chicken? Most dragons do do breed with a sort of cloacal system similar to birds. Yes. So like birds do dragons have no penises?

Like I said, most dragons do breed with a cloacal system similar to birds. That answers the question. No, no, no. Tuck says we saw his balls. We saw him. I find that extremely difficult to believe. No, actually, Mrs. Abdulna, we explicitly said that we saw his balls when? That's fine. Like episode four of season eight. Why would a dragon have balls? Well, he did. He did. Oh my God. Unless there's something else like those lava sacks, but they looked like balls. Yeah, they look like balls.

Okay, so they can still have external testes, but maybe their mating system is still a cloacal. Oh, yeah, that would make sense. Most male dragons, the testes are external because the great internal temperatures in a dragon do potentially lead to damage of the reproductive organs. So they are air cooled in most cases, but in terms of actual reproduction and mating, it is a system quite strikingly similar to avian life forms. Do the dragons only… Hi, Ving Sage, librarian.

Friend to speaker of the word people. And other librarians are putting up their hands and then one of you fucking assholes talks and they put their hands back down. So do you know anything about the mating habits? In terms of mating rituals? Mating rituals and habits of dragons leading up… Do they… Is it interspecies play? Like, do different dragons make different dragons? Oh, I see what you mean.

All dragons start from an almost identical infant form and then based on their environment become exceptionally different through their lifestyle. Oh, beautiful. It's similar to domestic cats, whereas breeds are hard to track because the parentage of cats doesn't necessarily lead to similar breeding. You know what I mean? She says very casually. Do you understand? Yes. All dragon eggs, begin the same, but you never know what dragon you're going to have through its pubescent stages. Yes, Billy.

I have a second question, Farrah. Does the little dragon fly? So cute. That is the cutest question. Everybody… I know that like 99% of the librarians in the room go, oh my god, he's so fucking cute. And even Farrah's like, not initially, not right away. It's not immediately after hatching that they are capable of flight, but usually within 7 to 10 days they are capable of using their wings to find sources of food. Yes, Billy. What I meant is, does that little dragon fly?

And I point to the pictures of Black Spire. Oh, Black Spire. This dragon, who's… His name, through extremely convenient means, we have determined to be from Night's Embrace of Black Spire Rises. And a few librarians… You hear Bulko in the audience here go, that's fucking sick. Metal is fuck. It's fucking cool as hell. Yeah. I'm changing my book's tattoo. That's sick. This guy is going to get a tattoo. I do love Bulko.

Because his environment from infancy to adult hood was contained and quite restrictive. His body never developed the support structure muscularity-wise to enable flight. So his wings are mostly used in a type of threat display, which is fascinating. Cool. Thank you. You're welcome. And the talk continues. More people ask questions about, you know, like… I'm going to say, two people get a question in before Tuck has another question. Tuck was busy drawing this. Pretty cool.

This is Tuck on the back of Black Spire, but there wasn't enough room, so I drew his face here and I tried to draw him sitting up here, but it ended up just looking like Tuck. I started saying this to the guy sitting next to me. Oh, you're saying this to the guy sitting next to you? Or sitting… Bing? Or the guy… No, the guy on the other side of me. Whoa, that's, uh… Really distracting. Thank you. Yeah, no problem. Just wanted to, you know, share my fucking art with someone for once.

Okay, alright. And I push his papers on his chest. Whoa, hey, hey, hey. Okay, fine. And he pushes one of his papers in your direction and you see a little drawing of Black Spire. Oh, sick. Yeah, right? Yeah, you got his balls in that one. That was good. I thought it was important. And they're funny. Okay, yeah. Unless you guys have any other questions, I do have a question. Okay, alright. That's why I raised my hand. Uh-huh. Okay, Farrah? Yes.

You said that he ate giant bones and now he's, like, made of giant bones, right? In not so many words. Sort of a simplification, but sure. You know how you and me were talking about how, like, giants were… Yeah, I do recall you and I had that sort of lunchtime meeting where we were discussing dragon physiology. Uh… Okay. Okay. Well, then… Uh… My follow-up on that… She's, like, she basically… She stopped you. Okay. Yeah, she stopped you from talking about the coins. Okay. Yeah.

Oh, no. I wasn't gonna ask about the coins. Well, you're asking about, uh, giants and their ability to, like, mitigate demon possession and stuff like that? Yeah. She stops you from talking about that. Okay, okay. Because that was gonna be my question. She's like, is he immune to demons? Yeah, she stops you 100%. Okay. She sees what your question is gonna be and stops you. Okay, and I'm like, alrighty. Draw an X through this question.

I'm like, okay, my other question is what happened 100 years ago that made all the dragons go away? Ah, that is a sad business. Um, as dragons became more prolific, the value inherent in their mineral scales became very apparent to organizations and nations around the world and dragon hunting was a very successful and sought-after business.

So many dragons found themselves on the unfortunate end of warrior prospectors, which led to dragons not being able to find mates, not being able to lay their own clutches, and not growing to sizes sufficient necessary to defend themselves. Oh. Bummer. She ignores that. And yeah, unless you guys have any other questions, the talk will… Is there anything else that you three want to know? I'm just kind of waiting to talk to her after the thing. Yeah.

Smash cut to that thing you've seen in a million school movies where the students are filtering out and she's addressing some final questions as people are leaving. I saw it as like everybody's leaving and everyone's standing up and like slowly the crowd parts and she sees us at the back of the room with our hands with our hands still up. Um, just one more thing. And she rubs the bridge of her nose in stress and then cut to her office. Why did you stop me from asking that demon question?

She closes her door. I'm sure that you are well aware of the fact that it was just discovered that the leader of the militant arm of the Church of the Flame had been possessed by a demon for who knows how long and that there is some sort of conspiracy involving demons and those who wish their power, theirs, to chain the world, I believe was the quote. Right. The dark guard. So stop talking about it. Okay, I will. I'm… I'm… I'm sorry. It's… I'm sorry. It's just I've been under a lot of…

I've… A lot of stress lately. Our discussion the other day has left me with a lot to think about. This information remains within our circles. And I don't mean the library. I mean us. Okay. Me and you. And Perel, I suppose. If vital. Okay. I promise I'll keep it under wraps. Thank you. Oh, we were… You probably let her know about Perel. Oh. I guess Perel is sort of… He… It is mandatory he knows all this stuff because he just found out that a wizard friend is alive.

And, you know, like how you have Aquaria in Perel's journal. Aquaria is alive. Yeah. She takes her glasses off and throws them on her desk. You should be really careful with your eyewear. Wow. The ability that you three have to walk into my office and change the course of history is truly staggering. Okay. Well, wonderful. She sits down. And she leans back in a very unfair way. Yeah. Where she's got her like hand… Her head resting on her hand. Oh.

So, our theory about the increase in demonic activity over the last several decades is directly linked to the lack of thaumaturgists currently living. And we also know now that there is one currently living. Oh, yeah. Good point. That could solve that problem. Solve? No. That could supplement the knowledge of perhaps. Wow. How is Perel taking it? They were close. Yeah. We weren't really aware of that. We're giving him time. It's all… She holds up.

She opens a drawer in her desk and picks up the journal that Perel, Aquaria, and Morris shared. It's all in. Did you never… Oh, you read that? Yes. It's handwritten by three wizards. Yeah. We look through. Dude, there's mostly just pictures of frogs. It didn't seem that interesting. There are formulae in here that are of untold value. Oh, you sound like Perel right now. It's amazing that you three live in a fucking library. Well, it's not my fault. I can't really read. So, I did my best.

You do get a pass, Billy. You do get a pass on this. All right. Be that as it may, Aquaria, Perel, and Morris were extremely close. Like how close? Like, manaja? Are they close? There's not direct… Like, of course, it's not their extensively transcribed backstories or anything like that. It's mostly correspondence.

But I get the idea that the three of them were very close friends to the point where they frequently had vicious arguments about philosophy and their stances on life, but still held a great respect for one another. I believe there may have been some romantic overtones in some aspects of… Some of the relationships. But I believe that is a question that you should leave to Perel himself. I think his sobbing spoke volumes in that direction. Billy, I believe you had a question? Yeah.

In the book, is there anything that says how Perel became a wizard? Does he talk about that at all? He does. He makes passing references to the event. From what I can tell, it holds fairly true with a number of accounts that I've read over the years. Mm-hmm. The creation of some wizards, or the… Creation isn't even the correct word. Bestowment? Bestowment, appearance, emergence is maddeningly random from all that I can tell.

Some wizards are, like we have said, born as infants with their abilities. There are some stories which I don't believe hold much weight of people gaining the powers after a mighty… Feats of heroism or sacrifice. After near-death experiences. Near-death experiences. There is a pretty striking story about that. Some are sprung fully formed. No parents to speak of. Just appear one day. And others, like Perel, their powers emerge at seemingly random times.

Perel, of course, a man in his early to mid-40s, from what I can tell. There are stories of people in late, late stages of life. There's a story of a dwarf who was nearly 900 years old who suddenly became a wizard. Some of an 11-year-old human child who gained these abilities suddenly. And from what adherents to the study of thaumaturgy have discovered, those events nearly escape explanation. In all the accounts that you've heard, you haven't noticed a pattern.

There's no correlation between individuals. People have attempted everything. The movement of the planetary spheres. The life and death of stars. Seasonal changes. Environmental effects. There must be a leading theory. The theory is that they are bestowed those powers when their presence is required. If there is an imbalance elsewhere, that power is used to set the scales. That's the only theory we have. Nature finds a way. In a sense, yes. So a need. It's not a need. It's more of a void.

It's water rushing to fill a space. And if that were an event that was capable of reproduction, why has it not happened now? Right. Wizards left and no new ones have happened. As far as we're aware. Perhaps they have happened. And perhaps those individuals remain hidden and out of sight. Perhaps they do not understand what they are. If there was a way to… To… To force that sort of event. I do not know what it is. Well, yeah.

I guess this is important to us because we need to help Perel get his power back. It seemed… That he's lost everything. Right, yeah. He's told us that he lost his family. And I guess without that, all he had was his power. So it's important to us to find a way to help him get it back. Yeah. I understand. And if I could… I would… Like, don't mistake me.

I have been poring over volume after volume of thaumatological theory in an attempt to find even a shred of a clue of an inkling to point you in the right direction. But thus far, I've come up nothing. There is maybe an alternate way that we've found… Yes? What do you know of the knife used to transform Roth? Very little. The ways of the Magi are secret even by librarian standards. The texts that they record their rituals and beliefs in are, from what we can tell, one of a kind. Unreproduced.

Any records of what they do are singular, and I imagine aggressively guarded. Should we tell her? Yeah. Yeah, we should tell her. Should we say this to each other? Should we tell her? Yeah. We should tell her, probably. Tell me what? Well, okay. So with my pinky promise that I made with Roth, or was it Roth? No, the other one, Urk. So with the pinky promise that I made with Urk, he said that he was going to bring us a book from the Magi that was used during… The ritual that Ving went through.

And so far, he has not betrayed me, and he promised with his life and his soul that he would bring it back to us and not tell anybody or betray me, or else I would know. You have someone attempting to recover one-of-a-kind manuscripts recording ancient and lost rituals and ceremonial beliefs. Yes. I will give you whatever you need to recover those books and bring them to me. Oh, okay. I will think about this. Five dollars a day. Yeah. Plus expense. Each. Each. And dental. And health…

Extend health benefits. Whoa, Billy, where did you learn those words? I don't know. Ving at work, he's always saying those. Yes. Nice. Fist bump. Fist bump. Yeah, so she is like, I will, whatever resources you require, I will make available to you. We just have to like hang out here for a little longer, I think. Do you know perhaps where they might have met? Do you have any ideas of locations that the Magi have undertaken rituals or meeting places? Yes. Where? How have you not told me this?

I mean, Farrah, I don't know if you noticed, but whenever we want to talk to you, you act like we're annoying. So maybe we just don't want to talk to you sometimes. Yes. You're kind of doing it right now. That is fair. I don't know if you're getting as tired as we are of having your mind blown every time we have a conversation. I am. I am. Okay. Well, okay. Tell me, tell me everything. And she sits down and she grabs a notepad and she opens it up and grabs a pen.

And then Ving takes an iPod and pulls up, it's a few episodes ago of Spellor, and puts his headphones, puts his headphones on. And he's like, I'll just, yeah, you just get it from what we said before. And I think that's, I think that's where we're going to end it. Okay. Right now. I've been your game master, Sean O'Hara. Thank you for joining us for this extremely exposition heavy episode of Spellor. Joining me as always playing Tacoma Dome, the barbarian, Abdul Aziz. So long, everybody.

Playing Ving, the half elf druid, elementalist, sage, Paul Loppers. Take care. And playing Fat Billy, the halfling thief, Jessica Tai. Bye everyone. Thank you to Aaron Reed of Vancouver Sunday Service for his incredible intro and outro music. And thank you to all of you, our amazing Patreon supporters and just new supporters. Thanks for listening.

If you want to learn more about the show and get access to hours upon hours upon hours of audio content, monthly video streams, live games, postcards, merchandise, the whole fucking shebang, go to patreon.com slash Spellor, or you can find us online at Spellor most places. See you next time.

And so ends the tale of adventures three who tried the best they can Though dumb and scared and lost they be For time's abreast in revelry And though our journey may be like a conclusion We will not leave you alone We will not leave you alone We will not leave you without a resolution We'll return next week to hear some more Whilst you commute or do your chores And for you I'd gladly spell more

Hey, Spoutlorians, Abdul here with a quick Patreon announcement. We are implementing some changes to Patreon. First things first, we are introducing a brand new level called The Wizard. This level is a $300 tier. It entitles you to a monthly game GM'd by none other than everyone's favorite GM, Sean O'Hara. As of right now, that tier is restricted to only two slots, and I believe one of those slots is actually already gone. So make sure you jump on that if you want it.

The other change we're making is we are actually kicking off the Speltlor Almanac, where patrons at the $25 level will start to receive PDF pages of assignments, Speltlor's sourcebook, and that'll include maps, drawings, travel logs, all sorts of information and background on the world that we have created.

So if you're interested in either of those, or in any of the other awesome Patreon benefits that we have over on our Patreon, like extra audio content, video content, merch, custom artwork by the cast, handmade gift boxes, head on over to patreon.com slash speltlor, or speltlor.com slash speltlor. Thanks a lot, and enjoy the episode. Speltlor's Home Hello, everybody, and welcome to Speltlor.

I'm your game master, Sean O'Hara, and joining me as always, playing Ving the half-elf druid, Paul Oppers. Hello there. Playing Tacoma Dome the barbarian, Abdul Aziz. Hello. And playing Fat Billy the halfling thief, Jessica Tai. Hello. When last we left our heroes, Billy having absolutely devastated his relationship with Farah Margani, master librarian of the Margani Library, after stealing and then losing, a book from the library, decided that it was time for him to head out on his own.

A little Billy side quest, specific little episode, just to himself. And he left the library under the cover of darkness, followed immediately by Tuck and Ving, who realized that he was leaving the second he decided to pretend not to leave. He had his traveling backpack on, not his sleeping backpack. Yeah. That was the trick, is the sleeping backpack is a lot softer. Yeah.

And meeting some sandboat drivers with big personalities, the two groups independently went to McCall, Billy knocking out his sandboat driver, Bolko, and heading off into the city on his own, meeting up very briefly with Petunia the rat and the sticks before climbing up the side of the lighthouse of McCall, Tuck and Ving, absolutely ruining a farmer's night. And made possible the rest of his life. Yeah. Identity crisis. Really fucked with him emotionally.

Gonna have a lot of questions about the nature of the world. Yeah. Put on some absolute bare bones disguises and snuck into the city themselves before shaving their way into the lighthouse through the shack of Greg, Gregarious Gregory III. Once inside, Billy found Medjai leader, lieutenant, it's hard to say, Roth at the very top of the lighthouse. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

For real life years and it's gone now forever tuck and ving made their way into the lighthouse but not before billy alerted roth to his presence and uh a whirlwind chase took place before they realized that by escaping the lighthouse they would be leading roth right into the shack of an old man that they've been taking advantage of so instead they ran to the bottom of the stairs tuck cried out a challenge and roth has met them at the base of the lighthouse of mccall ready to fight he said this ends now his voice spiritually booming through the air yeah and that is where we find our heroes now yeah you know the last thing that you said up top about like the end of the things that we're all collectively doing or whatever that sucked that was a way more impressive very intimidating he cuts you off and he yells enough and he stomps his foot and a huge slab of brick pops out of the ground he punches forward and sends it barreling towards tuck tuck just cuts it with his ass all right defy danger dexterity six billy you can aid by making fun of roth okay so give me that yeah give me what he's doing okay uh billy is just like you know I'm basically like a basketball and I got through your trap so easy honestly if I was thinking you know for more than half a second I probably could have just like disarmed your trap and you wouldn't have even known and like your face is stupid two to six plus bond uh eight okay so that makes it a seven meaning tuck is still probably going to take some damage um but I'll say that you can roll this twice and then take the lowest okay so you're gonna roll a d and you're gonna roll a d and you're gonna roll a d and you're gonna roll a d ten twice six okay so you're gonna take six damage uh as you do slice the brick kind of you break it into a couple chunks but those chunks still nail you in the face and torso oh fuck and he is moving forward to strike again what do you guys do is he within reach of ving um he is yeah you're all kind of like I imagined you sort of together like in a line basically tuck in the middle if I'm roth mm-hmm if I'm roth I realize that you're not gonna be able to do anything you're gonna be able to do anything you're gonna be able to do anything you're gonna be able to do configuration of the room you are in front of me right now tuck in the middle billy to the right of me and ving to the left yes hypothetically hypothetically that's what it is uh but because of what are you waiting for roth is focusing on tuck primarily yeah I'm gonna use um the fact that he's focused on tuck to come at him from this side with a huge gust of air and try and push him back like a windmill kick sick is this just a hack and slash or is this elemental mastery uh this is a fight with to deal damage to a foe within your reach perfect nice four okay he is focused on tuck but as you come in and aim that kick at his head he just dodges right out of the way oh damn like you you maybe clip him in the side and like the cheek as you're moving but it doesn't look like it slowed him down and he's still going for tuck he's now like within arm's reach of me yeah billy what do you do can I create a willow the wisp illusion um like yeah like how much can I do with that he will know right away that it's an illusion like with willow the wisp the ones that you can just do idly are like basically entertainment okay like the the fairy child illusions are convincing you can create a convincing illusion she's used her last billy's used his last fairy child old shit consequences I was trying to think of something that like fuck if it isn't the consequences of my actions it's so tough uh just because we have a bunch of sheets let me see if I can remember the kind of stuff that billy's got going on you've got poison probably you have a dagger that has a poison reservoir unless you lost that no I still have it oh yeah I'm going to try throwing that dagger with the poison in it okay if I remember correctly it was the previous poison was depleted during the fight with the light guard so you might need to um refill it no I actually already refilled it oh wait yeah it says three doses of poison and then you can pour a ton of poison in it and pour a ton of poison in it and pour a ton of poison in it and pour a ton of poison in it and pour a ton of poison Three doses of poison.

Yes. And you might have used those three doses. Because remember, Shia gave you three doses of her garden snake venom. So you will have a different poison. Okay. What other poisons did you have with you? Do you remember? I have two uses of oil of taget. Oil of taget puts people to sleep. Do you think that Billy, honestly, Jessica, narratively, do you think that Billy has since refilled his dagger with poison? Oh, yeah. He loves to play with hazardous materials.

And he had so much time at the library. So he was like filling up everything. Like a toddler, you love to fill up containers. Yeah, that's true. Okay. All right. I'll accept that. There's a flashback to like Billy sitting on one of the desks that Perel is like studying at. And he's just like, bloop, bloop. Yeah. Bloop, bloop, bloop, bloop. Billy, can you focus, please? Sorry. And then Perel takes the oil of taget and then takes it, wipes his eye, and then just immediately passes out.

Face first on the desk. Now you've learned to not touch my stuff. So, yeah, I've got two. So I'm going to use my dagger and I'm going to aim it at Roth's chest. Okay. Because I'm really mad. Perfect. So something to consider with oil of taget is that it does put the target into a light sleep. So it's not going to knock him out for long. That's okay. But it might knock him out for a bit. That's fine. It's all we need. Two to six plus dexterity. Jesus Christ. Holy shit. Yeah. Nice, Billy. Okay.

Sick. So he's reaching out for Tuck. Like, he doesn't even have an element ready to go. He's just reaching out with his bare hands. And just before he gets his hands on the axe, a dagger just whips up from the side and slices him right across his bare chest. And he grits his teeth and he's still struggling with you. And then you see his eyes flutter and he starts stumbling backwards. And I want to take him because he's holding the axe now. Yeah. Okay. I take him where I pull.

I take him in and I then whip him over my head and then slam him into the ground behind me. All right. Because Billy has knocked him out, you're just going to roll your damage. Sweet. He's at your mercy. He's like, he's actively falling asleep. Okay. Eight. Nice. So he sails through the air in an arc and slams down on the ground. You could see, like, blood coughs up for a second as he hits the ground. As soon as he hits the ground. And Tuck's like, oh, shit. Are you okay? He's for now.

The poison is coursing through his veins. So he is on the edge of sleep. He's not getting up right now, but he will be very soon. What do you do? Oh, man. He's at your mercy. Basically. Can we? Should we? Okay. This is disgusting. What is our strat right now? Do we want to run or do we take him prisoner? I mean, when he wakes up, he's going to have so many things. In his arsenal. That's true. Anything around him. Yeah. Anything. Like, my stupid magic doesn't do anything to his.

He's way better at it than I am. He's just going to keep coming for us. Billy, can you put him to sleep with your sleep spells? Yeah, I can. He's already asleep. I think fairy dust doesn't do much to somebody that's already asleep. Okay. If we affect his tattoos at all, would that do anything? Affect how? Oh. I mean, nothing too violent. Like, tattoo over them? No. Turn them into penises. Yeah. Do something else. Oh, Billy, can you switcheroo his tattoos? Can I do that?

I don't think a tattoo is something you can physically remove from a person like that. Okay. That won't work. Yeah. A voice whispers in your head, we could just kill him. I don't want to kill this guy. Who is that? Oh, that was me. Sorry. Billy. Well, you know, I'm pretty tired. And, like, my patience is wearing thin. Understandably. Should we just kill him? I don't know. Is that us? To kill a sleeping man? It feels weak. Oh, man. We're all just digging around our backpacks. Yes.

As Roth is, like, actively struggling against the effects of the tagging oil. Stab him again, Billy. Okay. So I run and grab my knife. And I'm like, I think there's, like, one use left, maybe. Like, I'm like, it's, like, dripping out. I'm like, all right. Yeah. You just dose him again. Again? Yeah. I just, like, I just, like, let it drop into the cut already. Because it feels weird to cut someone who can't fight back. Yeah. So I'm just shaking it into the wound.

I'm like, oh, that probably stings a lot. All right. No more oil of tag it. And you can see Roth is, like, struggling. And then he settles down a little bit. But that's bought you some time. Not a ton. What's the assassin vine milk? That's from seasons ago. That's a paralytic. Oh, sick. Sweet. Amazing. That's a paralytic poison. That's a paralytic poison. That you've never done anything with. And, in fact, would probably be rancid. No way. Things last forever in mason jars. You know that.

It just gets better with age. Yeah. Okay. Hypothetically. Depending on the role. Yeah, exactly. But, Ving, you're, like, yeah, you are digging through your satchel, I guess. Digging through all your jars. And you find a little tiny mason jar that's full of a hardened sap of some kind. Oh, my God. Okay. We just need to juice this sap up. Spout Lore about this assassin vine milk. Yeah. How to reconstitute it. Oh. Well, yeah. Ving's knowledge of plants yielded 11. 11. Holy shit.

Interesting and useful. What you do know about assassin vine sap, which is, like, for the assassin vine, which is a weird borderline intelligent, like, carnivorous vine, it uses the sap as both a blood and a venom. And it does maintain its paralytic quality for some years after it's removed from the vine. And the enzymes in human saliva can reactivate it. Like, make it. Make it a pasty liquid again without getting rid of the paralytic qualities. Okay.

Ving takes a little swab of his little pant bottom there and swabs the guy's mouth. He doesn't want to use his own spit. It's really hot out here. He's going to. When he wakes up, he's going to be so cotton, man. And then, yeah, gets a drop out. Yeah. Just fills this slash across his chest with this stuff. Yeah. Go ahead and cross that off. I'm going to say it's old enough that you have to use basically all of it. Yeah. And, yeah, you.

Just mush it into Roth's cut that Billy just smushed another poison into. I'm just piling things in this guy's wounds. Yeah. And one of you, probably Ving, off in the corners of your mind, think, I wonder what mixing all these poisons in a person's body does. Oh. I'm not an anesthesiologist. I don't know. Yeah. I kind of want a role to determine how well this is going to work. Yeah. That's what I was thinking. Maybe. Defy danger intelligence. Oh, shit. Yeah. That makes sense to me.

Like medical knowledge. Yeah. Yeah. Defy danger intelligence. Six. Oh, Billy can aid if you want. Yeah. I can't think of how I would help in this situation. You've been alive way longer. Eight. Yeah. So basically you just do it. You mash it in there and Billy's like, yeah, it should do something. It might make it better. Might make it worse. Might make it the same. And you mush it in there. And, yeah, he stops. He's struggling against the effects of the oil of tag it.

And you can see his muscles like spasming a little bit. And then he is like not moving very much. But you can still see like cramps basically as his body is. Is he breathing? He's breathing shakily. Like his chest is like, but he's immobile right now. He's not trying to kill you. I put a blanket under his head. At least. I feel a little bad there. Should we take him back to the library? Yes. Yeah, I guess so. Oh, fuck. Damn it. More prisoners by the minute. Yeah.

So you don't know how long this is going to last for one. So if you're going to get him back to the library, you're going to want to move. Oh, Bulko's waiting outside for me. Yeah, let's go. That's a generous description of what happened to Bulko. That was really nice of him to wait for you, Billy. Yeah, he definitely like offered to. Okay.

So considering that Roth was the most direct threat that was potentially waiting for you right now in the sticks, you should be able to get him back pretty quickly. Maybe somebody's watching you. Who can say? I'm going to say that you have to go through the way that you were trapped. Because when you go back up to Greg's hole in the wall, the stonecutter bees have started filling that in as well. Oh, nice.

They like having like when they find a little like a good gap in a stone, they're like, Oh, yeah, we're doing this. So that starts to be filled in with like very beautifully intricately weaving stone tubes with that. Ooh, you know what I kind of like? Some of the tubes have little openings and the way they buzz inside. It sounds almost like a pipe organ. Oh, cool. That is really cool. Yeah. Objectively improved Greg's life. Yeah.

Which cancels this out and tuck lifts up the crumpled, barely breathing form of Roth. Yeah. And you can, you know, you're not in any immediate super danger. Again, you're just kind of idly wandering through this ancient superstructure that could hold untold wealth and mysteries. And you just go for the back door. Yeah. Cram your way back up the way you came, avoiding the tripwire. You remember up and out into the sticks and you're just going for the edge of town. Yeah.

I don't think we're trying to be stealthy, right? Nah. No. Like we were heaving a lot of stuff. I think you still, are you still carrying the bag with Terry, Larry and Chad in it? Yeah. I'm still carrying a bag of birdseed. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. No, you destroyed it. Yeah. You threw it at him. I had to. You gave. Oh, right. You used your axe. I used his girlfriend. All right. Whatever. So many bags of birdseed. And you're walking through the sticks.

It's like the sun is going to be coming up very soon. And like a jackal, a group of jackals see you carrying Roth through the streets. Good evening. Top of the morning to you. Do we, do we want to know what's going on here? Probably not. All right. No. All right. Carry on. And you find a bulk goes sandboat. Big mama on the edge of town. Hey, bulk. Oh, he's asleep still. Oh, shake him awake. Oh yeah, brother. Hey, you fell asleep there. Oh, did I? Yeah. It's okay though. I'm not mad. All right.

Well, Hey, it's your, it's your dad's. Yeah. They, uh, they came to, uh, bring me my bag. And took takes his little backpack off and it's like, yeah, here you go, Billy. Thanks. Tuck. All right. So we're going back to the library. Who's this? He points at Roth. Oh, this, uh, this is our, uh, uncle prisoner, our uncle prisoner, uncle prisoner. Is that a name or is that two titles? It's probably best. You don't know. And just get us back to the library as fast as we can go. All right. All right.

Understood. And he puts his goggles on. Can we go turbo speed? Oh, we're always going turbo speed. Little guy. Don't worry. Cool. And he, uh, starts piloting it back out into the desert, hits the turbo button, hits his NOS injector and you whoop ass back to the library. The sun starts to rise. Billy, if you want to roll your fairy child, it is a brand new day. Two, eight. And that means I get three holds. Three. Okay. So for the next, yeah. In game day, you have three hold. Okay. Um, yeah.

And you get back to a lane. You get back to a lane springs. Uh, no problem. Hop into the weird, like stables that stands in for the boat launch for the Margani library. And you are back inside. Cool. Bulko gets out. All right. Get put in there, little brother. And he gets down and he gives you one of those, like pulls you in. Yeah. And I slap him like a nice friendly thump on his arm. Yeah. He, cause he pulls you in full on off the ground. Yeah. To his chest. To his whole arm. Yeah.

Like you're a little, like you're a loaf of bread. He's just like, all right, I appreciate you involving me in your adventures. You're welcome. I hope to have another adventure with you, Bulko. And he, he sends you on his way on your way. This guy's going to be handy for sure. Yeah. Hopefully Randy's okay. Wherever he is. Oh, he's probably back inside. Randy's just having breakfast at the cafeteria. We cut to Randy and he's having a very nice omelet with a tea. I sure hope my boat's okay.

Oh, shit. His boat. We did leave it behind. Yeah. A hundred percent. Okay. So what are you guys doing with Roth? Take him to the infirmary. Yeah. And we send someone to get Farrah and also to get ghost route. Yeah. Right. Yes. Okay. So you go meet up in the medical wing. The medical wing we've described before is sort of a operating theater style room. There's like a sunken pit zone where all of the physikers of the library do their work.

And take care of people that have been injured or are experiencing particularly noteworthy or extraordinary illnesses. Mm-hmm. You come down and there is the head physiker of the library. Ooh. A lady. A lady. Maresh Elnor. Just a human woman. Maybe like exceptionally young for being like the head physiker of the library. Yeah. And she's really pretty. Yeah. She's like Dr. TV. Pretty. Pretty. Yeah. It seems like she was called away from like a fancy dinner breakfast. Whoa. Wow. Tuck, don't.

Don't what? I'm not doing anything. You're already doing it. No. So he puts Roth's body in front of his crotch. Oh my God. Like a binder. So yeah. Maresh walks up to you and she is just like, who's this? What's going on? What's going on? You've you've come into my pit with another unconscious person. Yeah. This guy is the head of the Magi or like a general or something. And he was trying to kill us. And then we may be mixed too many drugs when we tried to drug him. So he might be dying.

Uh, but also he can manipulate the elements. So that could be a good thing. Well, yeah, but you're going to have to dose him with ghost roots so that when he comes to, he can't do that. Every time, everything that you say when you're like, this is the head of the Medj. She snaps and she points at somebody and waves them over. Uh, we put a bunch of drugs in his body. She points at somebody else and waves them over. Like she's waving over a person for everything that you say.

And she just like, okay, put them there. It's like, all right, cool. What are you doing after this? Or what? Is there something she's already working? Like a bunch of people swarm the table. I love that. Tuck is still asking while she's busy. It's like, if you wanted to go grab like a coffee or something afterwards, I'll be around. Uh, or a tea. Or whatever.

Somebody takes Roth from you and they lay them on a table and they all walk over to this like little bin and they grab like this little cube of resin and they pop it in their mouths and they just chew it up and they all start working. What, what is that? What kind of snack is that? Somebody, somebody could Spout Lore. If somebody could Spout Lore about this, if they want, because no one's talking to you right now. This is like emergency situation. Yeah. Ving, what does the box say?

What is a cube? Seven. Seven? That's fine. Uh, it's colloquially referred to as, um, physics pitch. What does it do? It basically makes you temporarily immune to illness and infection. Oh, so it's like a self sterilization. Yeah, exactly. It's basically a little resin that's very hard to produce and very expensive to produce, but it makes you temporarily immune to disease and infection. Hey, can I have one of those? Absolutely not. Can I steal one of those? Please clear out of my theater.

I'm sorry. Okay. Yeah, sure. Whatever. Okay. Yeah. I'll be up on the top balcony or whatever. Theater. That's a great idea. You want to go see a movie sometime? Yeah. Ving is also like dibs. No. You didn't say shut the fuck up. You didn't fucking say dibs. I'll kill. No, I don't care. You can't call dibs on a person. I'm a feminist. I know. And I turned to her. I'm like, I'm a feminist.

An orc physiker walks up to you, grabs you both by the fronts of your shirts and starts pushing you towards the stairs. Oh, hey, you're strong. You want to go get a coffee or tea sometime? Or whatever. We're going to be hanging out. You've been bodily removed from the pit. We could go on double dates if you're into it. Farah enters the balcony above the medical theater. I rush over to her. She looks at you not as warmly as you're used to. Sarah, please. I'm so sorry.

And I just want you to know that I have completed the tiring journey of getting the book back for you. She looks at you like surprised. Really? Yeah. I told you I would not rest. Listen, I would give my life before I failed this task. So I give it back to her. Yeah. She kneels down and takes the book from you. I checked. All the pages are there, including the ones I might have drawn on, but I erased those. She ignores that. Billy, I'm very impressed. Thank you for upholding your promise.

No problem. Very tired now. I would understand. Yes. You have not slept in a long time. From what I understand. I will lay down and then I sleep right there. Just lay down on the ground. I will lay down. She sees you tuck and Ving approaching and waves. We wave back. Did you accompany Billy in his quest? Kind of. Yeah. After the fact. Yeah. I see that you have brought another straggler to the library. Who is this? His name is Roth. Ah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. You know of Roth?

Well, you mentioned Roth earlier, I believe. A magi of great power and an enormous threat to you all personally. Correct? And now you. Sorry about that. Hmm. But he is mostly paralyzed, so that's good. Ving hands her the remainder of the jar. Yeah, I used this and Billy used his paralytic. She takes the lid off and sniffs the inside. He goes, hmm, okay. Well, I will give this to Physiker Elnor and we will, um, I need the jar back when you're done. Very hard to come by. Very well.

Uh, and we will see that no incredible harm is done to Roth as it is. And do what we can to limit his access to the elements. Yeah. It seems like those tattoos on his arms might be a part of it. That's what Billy was saying. Okay. Very well. Um, perhaps it would be smart for you all to get some sleep. Okay. Okay. Do you know what the deal with Elnor is? Is she like single or whatever? I don't know. Okay. She like anything in particular? I have very little information for you. Okay. Good night.

She into dudes or chicks or whatever? Yes. Okay. I'm going to go get breakfast now because it is the morning and you have not slept in at least a day. Okay. I would expect. Okay. I would expect. I would expect. I would expect. I would expect. I would expect. I would expect. I would expect. I would expect. I would expect. I would expect. I would expect. I would expect. I would expect.

The approximate hour I guess afternoon if we're going to bed as the sun is rising yeah yeah and yeah what are you all doing now like I Sean O'Hara I'm very interested in kind of what your next steps are because it seemed to me like roth potentially was going to be a huge narrative threat but he has been imprisoned by you currently so what next yeah what do you guys think we should do oh yeah um we're in the cafeteria right now yeah we're talking yeah louise is on shift breakfast buffet oh just hold on I'm gonna get more goat cheese omelets plural yeah and perel is there he's come to join you he's uh bandaged up you know he's got salves and like pieces of fabric pasted to his body and he's kind of gingerly eating uh tiny button mushroom omelet trying very hard to not use too much of his body to eat his food billy is uh playing with the teddy bear trying to figure it out uh oh yeah and perel has the puzzle artichoke in front of him oh yeah did you figure that out no no I'm sorry that came out a little shorter than I thought are you upset about it it's really confusing maybe if it was a puzzle frog it's a plant but it is got complex interplay lots of parts are locking pieces oh it's this we got this from like morris wedge's fanny pack you got this in morris's fanny pack yeah yeah did you oh wait no oh did we found in the spirit world yeah you found it in the spirit world in boar's when boar was like digging stuff up fuck right yeah wait did we have another puzzle box you got a puzzle box from morris wedge's trap room in aquarius tower right okay and you broke that So you have not gotten that repaired unless in the last several months you've taken it to a clockwork person to get it fixed.

No. I don't mean this is from the spirit world. Oh, that makes more sense. It doesn't look pretentious enough to have been made by Morris. It's kind of twisting the pieces back and forth. Anyways, how'd everything go last night? I understand that you didn't stay after we returned to the library. I had to go get the book I lost. And then we had a fight with Roth. Oh. In the tower. What happened? I mean, it went pretty good. Pretty smooth. Yeah. I mean, for us, it went okay. He's here now.

He's here? He drops the puzzle artichoke and puts his hand in his omelet. You're fine. I mean, we already put a bunch of poisons in him. And I don't know. He's still out of it. He's still out of it. Yeah. They probably have him sedated pretty hard. Yeah. Is it a concern at all that he might come to and escape and lay waste to the library? A huge concern. Yeah. But it feels like that's a Farrah problem rather than an us problem. Yeah. Okay. So what do we do now?

I mean, we're still waiting on Irk to get us that fucking book. That's true. Oh, yeah. Yeah. Or not. And figure out where the heck he is. Yeah. Yeah. Mm-hmm. Yeah. But first, I need to… I need to wait and see. I'll know if he finds it or not. Mm-hmm. So something that I'm… Oh, God. I think he said… I think he mentioned this. It's not going to be like a quick thing for him.

He's going to try his best, but it might take a while to find the book and to get it away surreptitiously enough that he's not like executed or forced to give up his information. So in the meantime… Should we… So we'll stick around the library, hey, and like do some research. Yeah. Yes. Yeah. So remember… Just nerd out for a little bit. Yeah. Yeah.

Remember something that I established, I think, last season is if you spend a full day researching in the library, you can get an automatic 10 plus on a Spout Lore. Sick. Nice. Yeah. Fuck. I'm so dumb. Same here. It's going to actually… It's going to take Tuck two days, actually. Oh, no. He's forgetting… He's actively forgetting how to read. No. No. It's only going to take a day. So if you spend this whole day like just hanging around reading… You can get a 10 plus on a Spout Lore.

A single Spout Lore each. Well, Roth is out. I want… Ving wants to study his… The… Maybe take a sample and take it to the lab and study the ink in his tattoos. Oh, interesting. Sick. Okay. Yeah. So you go to the medical wing. He let his stubble grow in a little bit and like did a hard line on it. Like he's looking like real soap opera 2010. Oh, no. Like he's looking like a little… He's trying a little too hard. You… He did his hair. He performed it just in case.

And yeah, he took all the sleeves off of all of his clothes in case he wasn't wearing any shirt. Yeah. So you go in. You're ready to go. Tuck is in our rooms at this point in time. You get to him for a second. He finds all of Ving's sleeves and he figures out what he's doing. Who's an idiot now? You said that. No. And then I go to run out of the room and Ving's gummed it up with gum. Yeah. He's put gum on it. He's put gum on it. He's put gum on it. He's put gum in the lock.

He put Vaseline on the inside knob too. Yeah. He put Vaseline all over the inside of the door so I can't get out. Amazing. So you go to the medical wing and it would be really funny if Marush wasn't there. Walks in like arms moving, kind of swagging in. But she is there. You went through all this narrative buildup, all this comedic buildup.

So yeah, Marush is there and she's working with a handful of other physikers on a number of projects, including Roth, who is, I think they would move Roth pretty soon. Once they get him like stabilized, they're probably going to try and move him to like a specific chamber where they can suppress his like spiritual connection. If they can, they're going to try and mess around with ghost root.

Like they've brought in other herbalists and like spiritual experts in the library to try and figure out the best way to contain him. Yeah. Maybe he's in like an iron lung. That's. Oh, that's interesting. Pushing like ghost root smoke into him. Yeah. That's so cool. That's really cool. There's a gaggle of librarians all gathered together, like conferencing and writing on a chalkboard, trying to figure out what to do. Oh yeah. Chemistry equations and stuff. Yeah, totally.

And like physics drawings of like what the representations of the spiritual realms. So cool. And then there's like druidic runes and some like, you know, there's people that are spiritually interpreting their. Medical knowledge too. So it's like trying to bridge the gap. Yeah. And like just off to the side of this group, there's like somebody in deep, deep meditation. Like it's this whole confluence of different. It's a multidisciplinary. Yeah. Yeah. Kind of project. Yeah. Cool.

And Maresh looks up from someone she's speaking to and she sees you and she kind of shoes you away. He's taking it back because he's put a lot of effort into this just to be sued. The fuck away. And he was like, and he walks up to her like, yeah, you called me over. In fact, I did the exact opposite of I, I, I did the other go away. We're busy. Yeah. I mean, you're busy now, but the opposite of that is chill. Maybe you want to chill sometime. The opposite of busy.

I'm sure that you are well aware of the fact that you brought in a living weapon into my medical theater. Yeah. And I think that's a very important way to make sure that this individual that you brought into the library does not wake and lay waste to everything. Generations of people have attempted to build. Pretty cool. It's pretty hard to bring a weapon into a place like this. I bet it is. Speaking of weapons, check out these guns. Can I help you?

Do you have some sort of a practical reason for being here? I'm sorry. Yeah. I would like to study his tattoos if I can. Study in, um, what do you mean? I'm just wondering if I can take a small sample. Sample of the ink under his skin and, uh, take it down and into your laboratory. I was wondering if I could use a small portion of laboratory. I know that you're very busy, but I think it could be important.

The tattoos have a lot to do with his power and I am a spirit Walker was, I just, I haven't, I have, I have a hunch. I need to follow my gut. Please. It could be terribly interesting. Hmm. She, uh, she rubs her chin and she turns to another physical and is like, what, uh, what, um, and she's like, what? Um, a physical stimuli like that, like him taking a sample of the ink with that, would that be enough to wake him? And uh, the dwarf woman that she's talking to is like, mm, I don't believe so.

How deep are you planning to go with this? Uh, with these sample, just a couple of inches, inches, things that good with measurements into his flesh or whatever, uh, or meters. It doesn't matter. It doesn't have to be an inch. Try not to draw blood. Then we should be fine. Okay. Thank you very much. Okay. But just, um, know that this isn't your, um, private play area in the future. If you don't mind, I'm a head physical. I'm under a lot of pressure. I'm quite young to have this position.

Um, there are a lot of people looking over my shoulder. They would like to ask me at any moment. I cannot allow that to happen. She starts like twiddling a braid that she has kind of woven into her hair. She's like, please just don't make me look like a fool in front of anyone. You are in charge. And I will respect that. People have been talking and they're very impressed with the work you're doing. I just, I think you can move forward with confidence and know that you've got this. Thank you.

Thank you very much. Carry on. Thank you. And she goes back to her conference. So you're just going to like, he does one, like look back at her hard jaw. He pushes his bottom jaw out as hard as he can. She's just looking at you blankly. Yeah. Fair. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I'm being a douche bag. I'm sorry. There's a guy jamming his hands against the door going. Don't listen to a smart guy. Stuff. Guys are good. Yeah. The door is rattling in the stone frame.

It's been carved out of this section of the mine. Dust falls from the ceiling and a passing librarian jumps. We bash into the door and just keeps walking. Yeah.

Just uh how do you take it like you're just kind of scraping off yeah with a syringe are there any tattoos that stand out I actually think that these are different than the runes that you are familiar with yeah it's of a different like magical discipline and does there seem to be a confluence like is there a central image that's a great question well yeah what do these tattoos look like we've never looked I imagined like runes but what if like the runes are tattooed in like the blood of the animals whoa that's amazing that's so cool so they're like a dark red instead of like pitch black yeah and maybe there's like blood on my blood sort of thing yeah uh yeah I think it's like when you were facing down roth the turbulence that you felt from the elemental spirits was like too much for you to feel that sort of resonance from the tattoos now that he's in this torpid state um you can feel the resonance from the the blood that was used by previous shapeshifters I guess yeah wow strange okay I'm gonna take a little sample from his chest yeah below the giant cache uh so you tell me because we're doing these spout lores um you tell me what stands out tattoo wise like if there's an um an image of some kind or a design that calls to a certain kind of elemental or spiritual practice I think it's just maybe even as simple as like a black circle a dense black circle that's raised the tattoos are raised so they're kind of scarification scarification and and colored with uh both blood yeah that's cool that is cool so yeah now that you're closer you can see that it isn't just tattooing it's yeah it's ritual scarring yeah neat and they all kind of yeah surround a big black center yeah in his gut in his oh like right in his stomach interesting that's really cool okay yeah you get a little sample of one of those tattoos cool of the ink um we'll come back to that we'll cut to billy or tuck who wants uh to do a spell or next you go I'm still stuck in my bedroom okay um do you want me to let you out or do you want to be left to no tuck is in there and he's holding all the loose sleeves and he's like oh I'm not gonna let you out I'm not gonna let you out I'm not gonna let you go um and then um and then um and then um and then um and then um and then um and then um and then um and then um and then um and then um and then um and then um and then um but only wore one shirt.

Yeah. Yeah. I didn't know. I was just, the night before I started tearing off sleeves, like what, I don't know what I'll feel tomorrow. He's like, he tries on like one of his outfits and he's like, what about this? And he tears it off. He's like, no, not this one. He puts another one on. He's like, this is definitely the one. Oh shit. No, damn it. That's not going to work either. Okay. So what's the thing that Billy's trying to learn? Or accidentally learns even.

Billy and Perel went to like, read some books together. Like Billy's feeling bad for Perel. Perel's really like hamming up these injuries. So he's like, fine, I'll come with you. And like, I'll help you out if you want. But he's brought like the teddy bear and the puzzle artichoke. And would it count if I was like messing with those and seeing if there's something in there? So he's like, he's like limping as he's walking. He's like, oh, Billy, I can't believe I survived.

That encounter with those horrible Magi. But I gave them one of these. Yeah, that bruise looks painful. It is. Thank you. Is that a scrape above your knee? It's a cut, Billy. Not a scrape. A cut. You're right. Whoa. Anyways, so you want to come hang out with me while I read some books? Sure. But I'll bring my toys. All right, let's go. And he, he takes you to the, um, like the wizard history section that he's been digging around in. Sure. Yeah.

I kind of want to, I want to try this puzzle artichoke. I haven't really played with it. Yeah. In fact, they didn't usually let me play with it. So yeah, I want to play with it. Okay, cool. 2d6 plus wisdom to kind of blunder your way through the puzzle artichoke. Nice. Whoa. 10. Okay. Billy blunders his way through a puzzle artichoke. Well, yeah, he's just like spinning it around and he realizes like, well, you can't really use logic with this. You know, plants don't follow the rules of logic.

They always follow like a natural pattern and they, they go from the inside out. So he's like, he's just like fumbling around like, okay, okay, here we go. Like doing like different patterns of twisties that would go into like kind of the spiral effect that is basically like the pattern of life and the puzzle artichoke like a flower starts to bloom. Whoa, cool. So Billy, uh, Billy is like twisting and messing with this puzzle artichoke. I like the idea that he's actually saying this.

Like plants don't follow the order of man. They follow a natural order that hearkens to the patterns of life. Like he's having this very profound conversation with himself and Perel's ignoring him because Billy mutters all the time and he's like, uh-huh. Oh, wow. Really? As he's reading a book, uh, and the puzzle artichoke starts to bloom from the top down and, um, the seeds fall away revealing like a central cavity that was in there the whole time. Yeah.

And sitting inside is a, what looks like, like a fruit pit or a seed and it's got little bits of carving on it. Ooh, what's it made out of? It feels like it's made out of plant material, like wood. Oh, like it's, it's almost like a peach pit or like, uh, like a, like, like a chestnut. Huh. So I, I like it. Hmm. It tastes, uh, kind of sour. What? I, I think I know what it is. What? No, I, no, maybe not. I want to know. Uh, maybe it's a tree of knowledge. Oh, that makes so much sense.

Oh, is that because the carving's in it? Cause the carvings, are they runes? Oh, so Billy like flaps his hands and he's like, oh my God, is Billy going to have a plant friend? And just for context, we're not actually there. No, but Billy remembers what Ving had mentioned about like these trees of knowledge. Mm-hmm.

And Billy is also remembering like ancient, like an ancient memory of like not seeing these, but knowing kind of like about these trees of knowledge and what the seed might've looked like. And he knows they're very like precious and rare. So he's like, he like jumps off the desk and he, he's like, Pearl, I'll be right back. And he goes, I'll look for Ving. Yeah.

And for those of you that don't know, these knowledge trees came up during an Outlander session, which is something that we've been releasing on Patreon in which everybody gets access to the Outlander move that Tuck had for seasons and seasons. And they do a little bit of world building in exchange for an experience point. And Paul introduced the idea of these trees that organically pass on druidic wisdom. The basic idea is that the old, old druids didn't pass on their knowledge.

Like via written word, they did it through propagation of special kinds of trees that when they bloomed, blossomed from those seeds, they contained the knowledge like in their bark and leaves. And when the trees grew, it had, it grew with the runes within the bark already. So as the tree kept growing the knowledge, you would gain more knowledge and people read it off the tree.

And if you were able to nurse these very difficult to grow trees, you were able to gain more knowledge as it got older and bigger. Yeah. And the seed will only germinate for people who are basically like worthy of its knowledge. Yeah, exactly. And yeah, so Billy excited and running wouldn't notice, but we would notice as the audience that the words and runes and symbols that are, that look like they're carved into it. Aren't carved. Like it's naturally just in the seed. Yeah.

So Billy runs to go find Ving. All right. And we'll cut to Tuck. Tuck has gotten out of his room. Now. And he is a moodily walking around the mines with black spire. Okay. And he's talking to black spire, like any shit talking thing. And he's like, man, Ving said he called dibs on her. And I was like, that doesn't exist. Cause we're all feminists. And cause I had all these like feminist kind of questions that I wanted to ask her. She's a doctor.

And I wanted to be like, how did you become a doctor when you're not allowed to operate on your own sons or whatever? And then she opposite of a feminist and then Ving locked me in our room and then fucking forced me to stay in there while he went there, like with zero sleeves and like, probably like was like so smart and shit in front of her. Fuck. Yeah. Yeah, bro. Those are all concepts. I understand. For sure. And because of that, I know you're upset.

It took jumps on his back and hugs him from the back. And he's like, you're the only one that understands me. Black spire. Same bro. It would seem. And he's like, just trundling through the minds. He's kind of taking you deeper than you've ever been. Oh, cool. He's already getting pretty comfortable in here. It's like, yeah, this place is pretty sick. It's like, it's like my own pad. You know, it was nice. It was like early.

The place that you found me was like a pretty good pad, but it kind of started getting a little small and there was all that goo, but he's walking around and he's, he's finding like what looks like obsidian rubble, but you would probably guess his house of broken bones. And he's just like, this place is covered in this stuff. It's the bomb. Sick. Yeah. And once it, bro, I was digging around. I was digging around, snuffling around, and I found like one of these, but like opposite. Wait, how?

Like, this is like black crunch. And the other one was like shiny crunch. Show me the shiny crunch. Well, I ate it. Fuck. I'm sorry. Are you kidding me? What do you mean? Am I kidding you? I chomped it, bro. You think I'm going to wait? Okay. Well, tell me, did it look like this? And then tuck like rummages around, and in his backpack, and he pulls out the white dark card coin. And he's like, was it like one of these? No, no, no, no, no, no, shiny, shiny. Yeah.

Like, uh, what's the, what was the up thing that we saw when we were coming back? Oh, like, fuck sunstone. Sure, bro. Shit. It was delicious. Oh, no, geez. Dude, you can't eat that. That's so expensive. What do you mean? I mean, like, it's worth so much money. What do you mean? I mean, like, and then tuck is like, how do I explain representational currency to a dragon? Okay. So, um, let's say that you want to eat black crunch all the time, right? Yeah. Okay.

But say you have more black crunch than you can eat. Okay. So a guy says, okay, give me that black crunch. Whoa, hold on. And he, uh, he sits down on his butt. Like while you're talking, he's, he's, he's, he's, his front, his front legs are still on the ground, but he, his back legs flip out in front of him and he just plops down on his little butt. Yeah. So a guy says, give me that black crunch and I'll just like hold it for you.

And then whenever you need more crunch, I will give it to you just so you don't have to hold all this black crunch. Okay. All right. I'm starting to catch your vibe. Uh, so it's like, it's kind of like if I'm trying to crunch and like one of those gross worms, comes and crunches my crunch first. Yeah. This is somebody had the crunch. Yeah. Then the worms wouldn't crunch it. Exactly. Okay.

And then say you were talking to someone else that wanted black crunch, then you could just say, Hey, this guy has all my black crunch. If you need it, you can go get it only if you want it to give it to them. Hmm. And that's what money is. Okay. This would have been clear if duck was smarter. I think I, I understand. Okay. So, okay, no, so I don't want to talk. I understand. You don't have to keep talking about it. Okay.

Just if you find that shiny crunch, save it and then I'll give you tons more black crunch instead. Hmm. Promise. Yeah, man, I promise you a million percent. You're my best friend because my actual best friend just fucking betrayed me. All right. No, uh, Paul, the player feels really guilty. Yeah. And awesome right now. Uh, yeah, so, okay, yeah, I will not eat the shiny crunch right away. I will come in. I will try. Okay, here's the, here's my fear. Here's what I am a feared of.

If I find a shiny crunch and I, and you don't come for a while and I have to not eat it and it just sits there. So how do I know that you are going to come and relieve me of this shiny crunch? I promise you, I will come back and give you 10 times as much black crunch as shiny crunch. 10 times, 10 times. I don't know what that means, but it sounds like more. And then tuck is like, how do I explain ratio based mathematics to this drag? Yeah.

And he's like towering above you with his big, like his big front arms on the ground and his head's tilting side to side like a big dog where he's like, okay, so he's like, so tech is like, all right, and he drops one small rock on the ground. He's like, for every one of these, I'll give you this many. And then he drops 10 small rocks. Oh, a black crunch. So you give me a shiny crunch. That's as big. I'll give you this much black crunch. All right. Okay. Mostly understood.

I will not eat the shiny crunch right away. I will wait for you, my bro. All right. And then, and then tuck goes to fist pump him and he head butts your hand and I go to the infirmary because my hand shatters. Is there anything that you were hoping to learn in the mines or did you just want to chill with black spire?

I just wanted to chill with black spire because, because my best friend betrayed me and my son is hanging out with me, his nerdy uncle and the girl that I have a huge crush on all of a sudden is busy. The girl I developed a crush on instantly is busy. Uh, okay, we'll cut back to Ving. So Ving, you are, um, in one of the sort of more secluded research chambers off the medical wing. What's your plan with this sample? I wanted to test it against some ghost roots. So I get some ghost roots.

Ghost root and grind it up and I want to take a look at it in there. Um, they have a sun stone that they've molded into lenses and it, it's, it's not like a microscope, but it's exactly like a microscope. Yeah, it, it definitely magnifies things a lot, perhaps not molecular. What it does is it, it, you, it channels lights so bright, a very, very bright white, white light, but Ving uses his, uh, light site. He can like withstand it and it illuminates, you know, some of the properties of it.

Oh, that makes sense. Actually, can I propose a mechanism for how this works and why Ving is actually better at looking at it? Okay. So say they carve like lenses of sunstone, uh, and then they like lay a sample on top of it. The sunstone will shine the light through the sample and project it on a screen bigger than it is. Oh, cool. Yeah. Yeah. But it's like, it will like diffract and diffuse. So there's like a limit on how big you can actually make it before it starts looking shitty. Right.

But then can just look directly at the lens cause he has light sight. Right. So he can kind of like use his elf eyes to see. As, as like the, the, uh, what do you call overhead projector screen? Exactly. You can project it directly onto your fucking retina. Cool. That's pretty neat. Yeah. I like this. Uh, okay. So you are testing, testing the ink in Roth's tattoos against ground up ghost root. I just want to see if there's ghost root in there.

I think my theory is that they grind up ghost root and use some of the chars that blackness in with the blood of the sacrifices for what purpose I'm wondering. I don't know. I mean, we're, we're loosely saying that ghost root has, uh, got a spiritual quality to it. It could be like the binding agent. Yeah. Yeah. The chains that you saw could be this substance.

What if, if it's sort of like basically like a seed and then the tattoos, like the runes act as like roots that sort of like that symbolic nature of like we have rooted the spirit and the energy of these animals, which we've taken their blood and we use like the ghost root to bind it to our physical form so that it can never truly leave us, you know? Yeah. Yeah. Those chains come out of that central thing. Every Druid, like the first tattoo they get is that big black circle. Oh yeah.

And then all the other ones are built off it. That's awesome. Yeah. Pretty cool. And it makes sense because the ghost root kind of pierces the realms. So if it's like, I need to anchor these like animal spirits to me and then like, how am I going to keep it here? It's like the ghost root is the thing that like binds this realm to the next. Yeah. And it, so it's not like through that it's almost like it's not that their bodies or their perceptions are piercing the spirit realm. It's the tattoos.

It's just the tattoo. It's like that part of their body, which would explain why it's so, so dangerous for them and why it's so painful for the spirits. And maybe when Marash is like looking at like the bones underneath where the tattoos are, she sees like sheer fractures because like that's where like all the like sheer forces is like focused. Oh, they're covered in. Yeah. And that's why they're also weak and because their body is always an immune response to try to heal itself. Yeah.

And that's probably, yeah, that's why Roth is so yeah. Scrawny, like the sheer pressure that's put on her. Put on his body and also the effort he has to expend. He also just can't eat enough to put on mass because he's just always exerting himself, which would explain why he's such a son of a bitch. Why he's so pissed off all the time. And he's so he has to be so convinced of his path. Yeah, because every day he's actively like killing himself. Yeah. Uh, cool. That's pretty intense.

We all get a point for that. Sean, take a point. Hey, thanks, man. Oh my God, I just leveled up finally after three years. I'm going to take the advanced move and the podcast. The move itself is called freedom. Okay, that's really sick. That's really interesting. Like the destructive nature of even being a Medi is really interesting.

And at that moment, Billy bursts into the room because somebody mentioned where you were and then Billy started sprinting through the medical theater and they couldn't stop him. Yeah, I like the thought that Maresh likes Billy a lot. Everybody kind of likes Billy. That's the thing is like he's such a precocious little kid that they're like, yeah, sometimes he tips over a big pot of gumbo. Sometimes people will go back to their rooms and find him in their sock drawer, but it's cute a little bit.

So, okay, so actually while Ving is doing this work, the door opens and Billy is in Maresh's arms and she's carrying him into this chamber. She's like both trying to get her attention, but Billy just has it. Yeah, look, I told you he was just working. Here he is. Oh, well, thank you. Hmm. Um, also, thanks for the ride. I have been running a lot. I can tell you're so sweaty. Yeah. Oh, little guy. Well, why don't you come by later for some tea? Okay. Do you have like sandwiches too?

Oh, I can get some sandwiches. Certainly. Sweet. All right. Sounds good. That sounds great. Vings. She casts you a look and then walks out of the room. Oh, damn it. Um, hey, Ving. Hey, bud, I want to show you something. What's that? Uh, and I open my hands. Oh, it's a seed, a tree of knowledge. Yeah. It was in the artichoke puzzle. What? These are so rare. Oh my God, Billy, we have to try and grow this. Like right now? No. Oh, too delicate in the, in the desert. This is amazing.

I just, I just wanted to show you, what does it say on it? Uh, I mean, these are very old runes. Right. I should know this. Oh, I didn't even try to read them. Uh, do you have an idea of what, let's say you can find, you can see like one phrase. Oh, maybe the differences from the different trees have kind of like an environment that they like to start in. And that's kind of written as like how to start it sort of thing on it. So it's like, it's like a growing instructions, like on a packet.

Yeah. Yeah. They come with their own instructions. Cool. Yeah. Um, this one is a willow. Nom, nom, nom, nom, nom, nom, nom, nom, nom, nom, nom, nom, nom. Oh, Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. That is the interesting thing. What is the useful thing that we gain from this? Um, yeah, I think, you know what? I mean, I don't know how old this like seed is, but it's still good. Like these seeds don't, they can withstand a lot.

Yeah. Um, and Oh, you know what? I bet it's these seeds will like survive long enough for someone worthy to find it. Oh, that's cool. Yeah. Oh, and maybe once you do, maybe that's the thing that's useful. Billy notices it when he's like, don't put it in your mouth, but it's like, it's popped and there's a little bit of green. Oh my God. Oh, like, yeah, the color of the seed changes just a tiny little bit. Just it's cracked a little bit and you can see that it's starting to germinate.

It's tiny vein of green. It's chosen you. Oh, that's, and Billy's like, it's my pet now. Oh my God. That is so beautiful. Great. Okay. What's Tuck doing? Oh, what's Tuck doing? He's wandering around the halls now. With a broken hand? Uh, no, his hand was just hurt a lot. It wasn't actually broken. Okay. Yeah. But he's, he's writing a poem to Maresh and he's like, all right, it's what it would work. He's trying to do an Alec, you kind of thing again, where he's like, nice to the beautiful Maresh.

Her name is Maresh, right? Yes. He turns to a random person. It is like her name's Maresh, right? I don't know. The doctor, the hot doctor. Oh, Physiker Elnor. Yeah. Her first name, her first name is Maresh. Sounds right. Fuck, I hate you. I hate you. Good. I don't want to be your friend anymore. Then get the fuck out of here. I am getting out of here. I was working on something and you walked up to me. Tuck knocks the shit on his desk off. That took me three years to build. Fuck you.

And somebody walks up and is like, are you okay? And he's like, yeah, it didn't take me three years. I was just being an asshole. Uh, to the beautiful, he's walked away. Yeah. To the beautiful, Maresh. I would like to see your flesh. Fuck. That's not good. Feminist. I'm a feminist. And, uh, he walks, he, as he's like, what are you ready? Walks past her, his office. And then he realizes that he never explained the demon thing to her. And he never figured out what this white coin was. Right.

So he goes back and he's like, Farrah. Yes. Tacoma. How did you, uh, it always seems, why is it? Whenever I am shaken from a reverie, it is because of you or your friends. What are you, what reverie are you looking at? And he comes behind her desk and looks over her shoulder. Uh, you see that she is, um, writing and you're reading the McCollin and she's writing poetry. Oh, whoa, no way. I was trying to write poetry and she, she covered, like she very quickly covers the thing she was working on.

She was like, it's not finished. Yeah. Mine isn't either. And then, I'm like, here's what I have so far to the beautiful Maresh Tacoma. I can really see your flesh. I would. Wow. All right. It's still not finished. Is there a reason that you came in here? Right? Yes, there is. Thanks for reminding me. It's a poem about how visible her skin is. It is visible. So this is tuck talking to her assistant. Yeah, it's visible. It's not completely covered. I believe you. All right. That's a parrot.

It took it like he, he takes the two coins out and he's like, he drops them on the table and he's like, all right, two things. One thing we forgot to tell you was it seems like demon possession is becoming more prevalent in the city. One of the things we dealt with was this like dwarf guy who had tried to use ghost route to like do something, contact the spirit world. And he ended up like inviting the demon of ambition in. And I was like, I'm not sure if I'm going to be able to do that.

I'm not sure if I'm going to be able to do that. I'm not sure if I'm going to be able to do that. I'm not sure if I'm going to be able to do that. I'm not sure if I'm going to be able to do that. And then when we tried to banish the demon, this black coin turned white. So then that brings me to the second thing I probably should have told you. I don't know. Six episodes ago. I think these, these coins are related to the dark card. And I think this is how the Torch found me in the library.

Now, you say you think do you mean that you were directly told uh yeah ama told me that and he suggested that I throw them away and then I might have immediately forgotten because it was the end of a recording weekend I understand because also it was farhan that told you that oh right but I have spoken previously to farhan and grandfather ama about these coins and they are both in agreement that it is something that demons are able to perceive in some way so I am absolutely floored that you even still have these yeah I mean one of them came in handy the white one it turned white because we had to like banish a demon with it or I don't fucking know I just broke it and stuff happened interesting and she picks up the two coins she hesitates to pick it up considering the extremely specific circumstances in which you were able to shatter this coin with your spirit world forged axe I would be surprised if that was the purpose of these coins um in terms of the black coin the obsidian coin from what grandfather ama and farhan are a were able to remember it seems that they do have some sort of use in tracking they described it as in tracking individuals that are most ripe for possession something about the coins calls out to those who are in need in some way in a way that would make them more likely to welcome in an icon's influence wait so you're telling me that me carrying around this coin is because I'm susceptible to demonic possession or is making me susceptible to demonic possession um question mark it seems to be with you specifically um where did you find this coin you said uh I found them in like travel or shrines in the principalities they're like all over the fucking place yes well that would make sense if the coins are proliferated by individuals then the idea I suppose would be people who are more likely to accept the influence of an icon would be drawn to the coins in some way and through the carrying of these coins the demons and icons that are able to control them would know that those individuals are vulnerable so whether you picked up this coin out of sheer curiosity or whether it called to you in some way I do not know the fact that you have two of them is very interesting to me but it would say to me that this white coin has been potentially expunged of whatever influence creates that effect so fara says she you know she slides the coins across her desk to you assuming that you have stopped looking over her shoulder and walked right around to the front again and she says so working with this theory this coin she points at the white obsidian should be safe potentially though it might also contain the aspect of an icon this black coin if I were you I would get as far away from me as possible however if what we think is true is true it could just potentially be picked up by some other sorry soul that would find themselves possessed so you are in quite a pickle as they say that's callback I understand that you were in a pickle earlier oh right yeah shia forced me into a pickle that I feel like everyone's pretty cavalier with the fact that shia tried to drown me no she no the way that she says it she pranked you bro and that's on you uh yeah so that's what she says she's like who knows what you want to do with these coins but either way they're bad news uh okay is that the useful bit that you might want to get away yeah um the useful bit I guess is that that's what you know these coins that's what you think these coins might do um like they can be used to trap demons they might have like multiple functions and maybe that was a one-off fluke like just because tuck is who tuck is yeah or like the fact that it was shattered by terry larry and chad maybe that's the only way that that was possible maybe yeah this actually kind of makes sense because like within the coin there is a thing that calls to people who can be possessed and then calls to demons to be like come here and possess this person so like there's like a calling like a negative like a vacuum kind of thing that pulls things in little black coal coins but then when tuck broke it it like broke the containment and it sucked in like whatever demonic things were in the area cool yeah and then it neutralized it basically yeah that's really cool it filled it so the whiteness is the whiteness of an icon like we always think of it like the outer dark is full of icons and they're dark but the whiteness is because there's an icon in there yeah yeah neat is there constellations and stars that people worship as icons there's some in something like they're the white against the sky oh maybe yeah there's something in somebody's yeah stories maybe like giant lore is like within astrological lore yeah the bowl of the celestial heavens each uh star was like a like a demon like a different demon yeah or giants very well may have seen icons as a totally different force where they're like they are oh you know what's kind of cool is considering giants are so they were so concerned culturally not like you know they're not not every giant was exactly the same but their culture generally revered trades people and crafters if they saw the icons as like the muses kind of sometimes like people would be overtaken by the spirit of creation oh and they were like that's what the stars are the stars represent like the the muses inspiration cool so they might have had a very different relationship with icons yeah because their bones are obsidian and they are better able to accept that influence into their bodies and mediate it so it doesn't completely overtake them whoa it contains them yeah within their core that makes so much sense they can get so much more youth that's why they're able to do all the like insane things they got to do yeah that's why they're able to build such monumental towers holy shit maybe that's why there's so many demons like and issues in mccall is because the giants are no longer here to contain it oh my god and they were broken up into smaller segments then right what would that mean for orcs then if orcs were descended from giants maybe that means that the like what the god of the flame did was remove their a bit like remember that's the the like prevailing orc folklore is that we used to be giants and then the god of the flame like suppressed us and turned us into something less so maybe the god of the flame separated them from that connection they had to the icons or fundamentally changed their like physiology their physiology so they could no longer like like!

Accept and mediate the influence of the icons do we have we talked about orc physiology their bones do they have obsidian bones we can we know that their tusks are white okay so maybe they're maybe their bones are white obsidian yeah and everyone just thinks they're like bones yeah that's so cool amazing I like the idea that the giants could be like I want to build something so I am going to like open myself up to the eye to like a specific icon and they could choose kind of a ton of different types of şu şu şu şu şu şu şu şu şu şu şu şu şu şu şu şu that's how you did it and mccall because they're thinking about it based on human culture they thought that it was a lighthouse that told ships the shore is here but for giant culture it was a beacon to the stars yes that was it's oh it was a star on earth and that's why it has images of the giant creator god carved into it because the story is that they were inspired by the stars they were the first yeah yeah oh maybe it was like this was a star and the creator god reached up into the sky and brought it down and gifted it to the giants so that they could use it to like reach out and connect with the different muses it makes sense why the lighthouse is so very high up because it's like closer to the night sky oh my god it was as close as they could make it yeah I am rock hard right now this is I bet everyone listening is rock hard I am gonna bust if you're gonna shoot shoot into this yeah okay okay okay!

That's sick everything that we just said is fucking awesome it also makes sense why like in the that song the tolling yeah uh it's one of the instructions is uh the darkness fears the nighttime sun yeah yeah and it's because like the lighthouse itself has an influence on demons so if we don't really like pass within its like shadow because they're afraid that if they're overexposed they'll be overexposed and overexposed and overexposed and overexposed and overexposed and they'll be like separated from the body that they've overtaken yeah and they'll be like cast back to the outer dark cool oh man that's very interesting and mccollins might just not understand that like the fact that they interpret every like so much uh giant imagery as being similar to theirs like revering the day and the sun but their connection was to the night that's so fucking cool good job everybody pretty well done pretty fucking awesome well done well done well done I love fantasy I love my friends um okay so maybe that is kind of the information that tuck gleans throughout the day like it's he's talking to farah and he reads a book or two maybe or is this all stuff that's just in the wind and the characters don't necessarily understand it I feel like tuck wouldn't put this together yeah unless pharaoh was like let's talk about it yeah I think pharaoh maybe walks him through it yeah like you guys like the assistant leaves because you guys end up talking for like hours yeah because it's like tuck his face with a philosophical and moral issue now that pharaoh has presented him with which is just like I either have to endanger my family by keeping this or I sentence someone else to death by like just throwing it away basically so he's like trying to work through what he should do and he's like asking for pharaoh's help basically and yeah maybe that's like when all of this stuff comes up through this conversation it's like like us look researching and looking through yeah the parrot actually had a lot of really good ideas but you guys shoot him out of the room because you had to talk I don't want that parrot remembering anything that we're saying right now so yeah that's really neat I think there's maybe some stuff that the world doesn't still understand about that like giant culture stuff you know what I mean Or maybe, I guess if anybody would, if any group would, it's the librarians.

Yeah. Okay. So yeah, she's basically like, at the end of this, she's burning with curiosity. I thought you were going to say desire, but duck. Duck's so hopeful. Maybe just a little bit. But yeah, she is like, you've given me a lot to think about today, Tacoma. I am going to hit the books, as it were. I feel 90 again. I feel like a freshman again. Yeah. Thank you so much, Tacoma. Yeah. Cool. Also, think about what you want to do with these coins. Sure. I honestly have no idea what you should do.

Okay. I'm sorry. I wish that I could give you better advice, but it's kind of up to you. If you think you can withstand this influence, and if I'm being honest, I think that you, of all the people that I've met recently, would have the greatest chance, then do it. If you fear that the risk is too great. To you. To you and those you love. I can't begrudge you making that choice. All right. Thanks for laying this burden on my shoulders. I will go finish my poem now.

It's like five hours have passed. You're like, what was this poem about again? So, Tuck, you're heading, you leave Farah's office and you're wandering, working on your poem. And… I'm kind of… Kind of distracted. I can't, like, my mind keeps getting pulled back to the two coins in my backpack, trying to, like, figure out what I should do with them. So, nothing happens with the poem. Yeah. I just crumple it up. I throw it out. I'm like, fuck. Think and have. I don't give a shit anymore.

And as you're walking away, casting a longing glance at that garbage can, you hear, hey. What? What? You turn and Fatim is standing behind you. And Tuck drinks. Tuck squares up. Tuck squares up a little bit. And he's like, hey, what's up? Can we talk? And that's where we're going to end it for this week. I'm your game master, Sean O'Hara. Joining me as always playing Ving the half-elf druid, Paul Oppers. Take care. Playing Tacoma Dome, the barbarian, Abdul Aziz. So long.

And playing Fat Billy, the halfling thief, Jessica Tai. Bye for now. Thank you to Aaron Reed, the incomparable Aaron Reed, for our intro and outro music. Thank you to our Patreon supporters. Our incomparable Patreon supporters. Supporting us around the world. If you would like to support the show, go to patreon.com, throw a slash in there, and then Spout Lore afterwards. Or Spout Lore.com slash money, please. We've got a whole bunch of Patreon benefits, like 150 plus hours. No. What is it?

How many hours of bonus content? A lot. I don't know. There's definitely more than 100 hours. Really? Yeah. Pretty good. 100 plus hours of bonus audio content. Wait. No. No. There's definitely less than 100. 100 hours. Less than 100 hours of bonus audio content. But definitely more than 60 hours. Between 60 and 100 bonus hours. And maybe more than 100 hours. You know what? Use your discretion. And we've also got some video content. We do alternating Q&As live monthly.

And then on the off months, we do live Lone Tree Hill episodes playing Fiasco. And if that is the kind of stuff that you're interested in… And maybe hit us up. Or if you want to help, drop us a review on iTunes. We love them. Thank you so much. See you next time.

And so ends the tale of Adventures 3 Who tried the best they can Though dumb and scared and lost they be For time's abreast in revelry And though our journey may be like a conclusion We will not leave you without a resolution Return next week to hear some more Whilst you commute or do your chores And for you I'd gladly spell more

Hey, everybody. Abdul here with the Spout Lore crew. Got Paul. Yeah, hey. Jessica. Hello. And Sean. Hi. And I've taken over the podcast. That's why I'm doing the announcement. Finally. Thank you. But we just wanted to drop a quick announcement here at the beginning of this episode, because this is a very special episode that we did a crossover, a special Halloween crossover with the crew over at Dungeons and Dragons.

We played an episode where our group and their group met up, and we had a spooky Halloween time adventure. And spooky it was. The first half of the adventure is going to be over here on our feed. And if you want to hear the conclusion, you're going to want to head over to the Dungeons and Dragons feed, where we, for the first time, play D&D 5th edition. Is that what that was? It was. It was. I know it was a lot more dice and numbers than you are all used to. Yeah.

In the second half, we are at a middle school dance. So you get to see exactly how awkward we all were in middle school. It was pretty fun. And you should be able to find a link to that episode and their feed in the show notes. So yeah, enjoy the episode and head over to Dungeons and Dragons for the conclusion. Thank you. Bye. Bye. Bye. Bye. Bye. Bye. Bye. Bye. Bye. Bye. Bye. Bye. Bye. Bye. Bye. Bye.

But nine years old You know them by name, you know them by deed Their quests are famously daring So here I sit Singing to you an adventure That is worth sharing Tuck is the brute, he knows not his home He loves to sing and fight Thing is half-elf, he shifts his shape And wields a spear with great might Billy's a thief His tiny size does max the largest heart Best and brightest They may not be But their friendship outweighs their smarts So gather round friends And listen close For the tale's about to start Hello everybody and welcome to Spout Lore I'm your game master Sean O'Hara Joining me as always playing Tacoma Dome The Barbarian Abdulaziz Hello, I am Tacoma Dome I am a human barbarian My pronouns are He, him, and so are tux And I am Seven foot tall Five foot wide Probably like three feet deep I wear Kind of like a loose Kind of loin guard and boots I've got a loot with me most of the time Like a little backpack I'm bald of head and thick Of thigh And I have Like brown skin And Yeah, that's just what I look like Most of the time And now the character?

Yeah, also this is what the player Abdul also looks like Just scaled down by about 75% Playing Ving, the half-elf druid Paul Oppers Hello, my name is Paul Pronouns are he, him And I play Ving Vang Zumba A half-elf druid Pronouns He, they And he's a shapeshifter With wild gray long hair And a big puffy fur collar Flaps, lots of leather flaps Clothing flaps And waist flaps Knee flaps I got some dainty little boots on To help me Move through the forest silently And I have a spear And I'm tall and thin And wild gray eyes Pointy ears and I got gills Go on And playing Ving Fat Billy the Halfling Thief Jessica Tai Hello, I'm Jessica She, her I play Billy Who is a halfling child thief His pronouns are he, him He is two feet tall And two feet wide A little beach ball baby Rosy cheeks And red ginger hair He's cloaked in a little raccoon skin Cape hat thingy And wears little like I don't know, earthy tones Little baby boots Just a little guy in general Very hungry all the time And not joining me as always Playing Nrixius Acra A.K.A.

Glim the Dragonborn Paladin Carla Maxted Hi, I'm Carla I play Glim Glim is a Dragonborn paladin So Dragonborn is very tall She's about six foot five Looks like a bipedal dragon Covered in scales That are kind of different hues Of metallic brass and rose gold And platinum Her hands are Have talons with claws at the end She has a really long tail Big long horns And she is real into Bahamut Her main god Number one Love Playing Sullivan Slight The halfling rogue Amy Hey I'm Amy Moore And I play Sullivan Slight A lightfoot halfling rogue Sully has He's a He's a halfling So he's a shorter person He's a shorter person His pronouns are he him He's got this like Kind of like mid-length haircut With like half up bun situations Kind of a half man bun going on there And he's got deep dark skin And likes to dress in leathers And earth tones And he's pretty ballin' I'm playing Moot the half-orc sorcerer Tom Laird Yeah hello I'm Tom he him I'm playing Moot He is a half-orc sorcerer Has a wild magic background So occasionally he funds me out of my life Occasionally fun things happen when he casts spells He's got dark green eyes He's about five foot five Dark gray kind of green skin He's got a couple like lower fangs That kind of jut out from his mouth And yeah he kind of Just rocks like a messenger bag And you know Tunic and pants and boots That's so funny That he's just got a messenger bag He's got a little laptop in there Right I wish If you haven't guessed yet We've got sort of a crossover situation going on folks We've got the fine fine people at Dungeons and Dragons joining us today And also co-gming Russ Moore Hey that's me Co-gming gonna have a fun time It's like what we're doing here is like a Saturday morning cartoons crossover You know of the days of old 90s when Spider-man would go visit the X-Men And we'll let you determine Who's Spider-man and who's the X-Men in that scenario But if you don't choose Russ as Spider-man He'll hunt you down Yeah he will be personally offended When Abdul was last on our podcast he called people out to come to his lawn Now's the time when I drop my address and call you to my lawn Did I give out my address?

Yeah and your phone number buddy And your phone number Don't worry I edited it out But you did scream don't edit this out right after that But it is still up for patrons so You know you pay money you know You can go harass him too hard Well I'll give it out again My phone number is And my address is And after this crossover you come to my house And you tell me which one of The two shows you thought was better Which one of the cast was better And if you don't pick Spout Lore I'll Bite you on my front lawn Those are all fair things All fair you can pick Spout Lore when you're talking to me I'm not talking to Abdul but we know in your heart Of hearts that it's No competition because we're all friends here No competition because we're all here to have fun Why is it so competitiony?

Alright stop me talking You're the GM Wonderful then we'll get down to A game of Dungeon World A game that you all have not played before Once Sweet once Alright Tuck, Billy and Ving Two days ago you were resting At an inn called The Pluck Chicken Having a Just a nice meal on the road waiting for You know night to fall and Sleep to take you when you noticed a Poster on the side of The wall next to the fireplace That said to all seeking Riches and glory Please come To the midnight fair And then smaller underneath Ancider festival To take part in the challenge set up by my uncle, Count Murphy Vengabus.

And if thou art successful, his riches and inheritance thou shalt gain. And you found yourselves unable to resist the challenge. Let's see a second of how unable to resist that challenge you were. What does the poster say? It says, if to all seeking riches and glory, my uncle, Count Murphy Vengabus, has set up a challenge at the Midnight Fair and Cider Festival. And if thou art successful, his estate and inheritance thou shalt gain. How big is this fucking poster?

Yeah, it's actually a guy standing next to a poster who is telling you, this is the guy, I'm the guy, this is what's going on. Can you just read it? Can you say it in regular words instead of like literary languages? Okay, if you can just give me a fucking second. So the Vengabus is coming. No, yeah, this guy, Count Murphy Vengabus died. And his inheritance is available to whoever succeeds at a series of challenges. Are the challenges haunted?

The challenges are spending a night in a haunted house. That's the challenge. At the Cider Festival? The Cider Festival is a… Adjacent to a haunted house. So do you want to undertake these challenges or not? Hey Edgar, have you put up the sign yet? I'm trying. These guys keep fucking bothering me. Well, look, the boss told you if they ask too many questions, just move on to the next schlubs. Yeah, if you don't want it, that's fine. I'll see you guys later. No, no, no, no.

Hold on, hold on, hold on. Is there free food at the Cider Festival and Midnight Show? Yeah, it's like a fair. There's like, there's food, there's games. Is there food better than the plucked chicken though? This stuff's delicious. I mean, it depends on how you feel about plucked chickens versus like a churro or an elephanty or a mini donut, which are all the same foods in different shapes. Wow, I've never eaten any of those animals. I would love to. I would love to go.

All right, then just see me. Come meet me outside tomorrow morning and I'll take you there. What time? Whatever, 7.30. You're going to be there? You're going to be here at the restaurant at 7.30? Do they do breakfast here too? Is it like a brunch? Yeah, they have a continental breakfast that doesn't start until 7.30. Because the unplugged chicken did not have an uncontinental breakfast. Look, that's when the carriage shows up and takes you to the venue.

So you don't have to, you can drink while you're there and then we bring you back home. It's very straightforward. Dougie, this was before I found out there was a continental breakfast. We will be leaving at 8 a.m. Oh, okay. Okay, 8 a.m. We can hold up. Yeah, I need that. I'm getting a little bowl of cereal. I need a bowl of cereal and a cold waffle. That's why I need that. And for my sanity, we cut forward 12 hours. I'm still at the inn eating, I don't know, my seventh helping.

I haven't slept at all. The driver realizes Billy is still there, turns around, goes back to the inn, grabs Billy. We cut forward another four hours. Billy is still eating. He's standing on the dead body of… Eating, finishing the bucket of chicken. And then we're going to cut forward an indeterminate amount of time that I'm in control of. And the cart that you three have been riding on for the better part of a day enters a forest. The sun is sitting low in the sky.

The gnarled, dark trees of the forest form an impenetrable tunnel ahead of you. The tunnel itself is not impenetrable. Yeah, how are we going to get through this tunnel? Yeah. It's a tunnel. Oh my God. It's one of those Roadrunner Wile E. Coyote tunnels that's just painted on. But a train comes out of it, really? Yeah. You enter the forest through the impenetrable tunnel and you hear in the, you know, the forest is quiet. You hear whoo, whoo.

And eventually the sounds of the forest give way to what sounds like calliope music. So it's kind of like… Like a… Like a jack in the box. That is not what a jack in the box sounds like. Okay. By show of hands, who thought that that was a jack in the box? I mean, organ grinder is pretty close. It's like… Right. Yeah. An organ grinder and a jack in the box are different things. Very close though. They are. Can I ask the owl where that music's coming from? Hey, who, who, who? What's up?

Oh, you can talk to animals. I always forget. 45 minutes later. Yeah. There's an owl sitting on the branches above you. What? What? Hey, what's going on? Where's that music coming from? How's this cider festival? Seriously. Is there anybody there? Is it worth it? I'm an owl. I have very little frame of reference for cider festivals, but there's people there. All right. Goodbye. And you ride a little bit further into the forest and come out into a clearing mercifully at last.

And the lights of this fairground fill the center of this forest clearing. There's stands everywhere with like black and yellow striped tents. There are people making and serving different kinds of fried foods. There's games. You can hear people yelling and laughing, having a great time, bells and whistles going off. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Haunted mansion of some kind.

It's kind of got like this rough and shabby painted wood facade. And there's a small line of people standing outside of it. And the guy driving the cart stops and says, okay, just get off of my cart. We're here. And if you want to do the thing, do the thing. But I just got to get away from you. Is it because I farted so much? I'm really sorry about that. It's just like the chicken made me so gassy. And I'm not supposed to hold it in. I don't think it was the chicken.

I think it was the sheer quantity of chicken that might have done that for you, my child. All right, noted. Now, please get off my cart and I will see you never again, hopefully. Okay, bye. Bye. Okay, hopefully never. Thank you, help me down. Yeah, of course, bud. There you go. Whoa. Sorry. You are getting a plump, my friend. Thank you. You're very welcome.

And then Tuck leans over to Ving and he's like, we should maybe start like teaching a portion control because an entire inn's worth of continental breakfast is maybe too much. He cleared out a generation of chickens. I know. You told me that those chickens like started a myth about him after he left. Yeah, they were talking about him. There was one who was carving in the ground an image of him that they were supposed to avoid.

For their children to be hatched because they knew they weren't going to be there when they did hatch. They called him the hunger. So, yeah, what do you guys do? Do you see what you believe to be the haunted mansion of Count Murafu Vengabus in the distance and a number of tents and stalls around you? Cool. Do you guys want some cider? I can get some cider. Yeah, I'll have some cider. Great. Let's get some cider. Hey, cider guy. Yeah. Hey, I'm not the same. I'm the same guy. That's for sure.

And I'm also selling cider. What can I get you? Selling? No, thank you. Adieu, my good man. I thought this was a free cider festival. Yeah, there's a booth a few stalls down that says free cider. Shit, sorry. This guy. There's a booth that's selling cider and then another booth that's just free cider. Several down from it. Yeah. Yeah. Good luck, buddy. We go up to the free cider guy. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah. Good luck, buddy. We go up to the free cider guy and we're like, okay, you, what's wrong with this cider that it's free when other people are selling cider? This guy has an eye patch and he's breathing kind of hard. I don't know what you're talking about. I've got this cider. I found, I steal from the booth three stalls down and I sell my I'll-gotten booty from this stall. No, sorry. I don't sell. I give it away for free. Did the cider seller hurt you, sir?

Um, that is a past that I keep within me. Do you want some cider or not? Heck yeah. We'll take three. Okay. Here you go. And he gives you, um, three cups of cider. Hmm. How's it taste? I never actually had me. Wait. I already drank mine. I don't know what's going to happen. What is your business model, sir? What's your name? My name. My name is, uh, is, uh, is tillium. Yup. That's it. It's tillium. Tillium. Yup. I think it's tillium. Yup. It's a really nice name. It's really similar to mine.

What's your name? It's fat. Billy is short for fat. William. Oh, they, your first name is fat or they call you fat. It's just, you know, everyone has one of them. Skinny. Billy. Old Billy. They were all taken. You know. Is this your kid? Do you call your kid fat Billy? He came with that name. Yeah. I mean, what's a name? My name is Ving Vang Zumba. I don't care. Like, what am I going to do is change somebody's name. I guess. My name is Tillium. Yup.

I don't really have any, uh, leg to stand on here. Anyways, you guys should go check out that haunted mansion. That seems to be sort of the focal point of the fair. And that's probably a good place to start. See what's going on. We'll work our way to it eventually. Ooh. Is that wiener drop? Uh, it actually is. Oh, yeah. Yeah. Shit. There's a wiener drop. Yes. A wiener drop.

As you were talking to Tillium Yup, three, for you, very interesting looking figures come walking down the sort of, uh, cider row. Uh, one is a halfling, not unlike Billy, but seems to be, um, a lot taller and leaner, though still not very tall or lean, uh, for a person. Uh, a person that appears to be partially orc. Like, but not, uh, the gray of the Macallan orcs that you're used to seeing. And a full-on bipedal dragon. Oh! Oh!

I hide behind, I hide behind Tuck, I guess, because he's the biggest. Oh my God. Look at how tall that halfling is. They're beautiful. Guys, I don't think we should drink the cider from, from this booth. Can't be worse than the pickle lemonade. And, and it says it's free, so. Okay. Yeah. Sully, Moot, and Glim, you seem to have three individuals staring aghast at the three of you. What do you do? Look, look at the, I mean the stare, I mean the staring.

Well, they, they're just looking at my cool ranch Dorito corn dog that I got right over there. Fuck, I want a cool ranch Dorito corn dog. That's fucking great. God damn it, Tom! My brain parsed that so weird, because I thought it was a cool. Cool. Ranch Dorito. Ranch Dorito. Hot dog. And then I realized what I was actually. No, no, no, no. It's cool ranch. Excuse me, people in front of us. Oh my God. Is this cider, is, is the free cider poison? Yeah, that's the question.

I mean, it's not immediate poison. We're still here. This one's on me. Oh, this free cider's on you? I, thank you. That's great. Thank you. That's so nice. Well, you guys, I don't know. Like. That's a good idea, man. Oh, that's okay. I'll see what I can do. Will you about to give us a price for these ciders? That, it says free? Oh no, it's free. Okay. No, I'm, I just, hey, can I, and he leans over and he tries to get one of your cups back. Oh, you can have mine.

Is this just a little bit of backwash? So you can just dump it out. Yeah, that's fine. I'll dump it out. And he dumps it out on the ground and he wipes it out with a shirt and he comes back up with six cups full of cider. Okay, that one might be poison. He mixes that with a little bit of cider. That's better. That's better. That's better. Dumps it out on the ground and he wipes it out with a shirt and he comes back up with six cups full of cider. Okay, that one might be poison.

He mixes them up before you can take them out. Of course. I want everybody to have the same experience with the cider. Anyways, it's not poison. Nothing instills confidence like someone saying it's not poison. Well, cheers. Cheers. Cheers. Sully does that thing where you pretend to drink but then just pours it down his back. Like Cookie Monster. I catch that in my empty cup which I had already drank. I'm like, I'm not going to waste this. What does this cider taste like, guys? Like kombucha.

Oh, kind of fizzy? Yeah, it's a little young maybe I would have said. A little green, a little fresh. Is it just apple juice? Well, it's not quite apple juice and it's not quite cider. It's somewhere tillium yuppling and it goes, ya close. Hey, maybe sometime do you guys want to pay for cider? Yeah, can we shuffle down and pay for some cider? Yeah, let's go to the paid cider. Just to compare. This one's on you guys. I'm sorry, what? No, totally. This one's on us. No problem.

Hold on, because he got the free ones? Just to be nice. It's fine. So, six ciders, my good person? This one has a monocle on. The opposite of an iPad. Just the same guy? Did he just come three boots over? He's also breathing kind of heavy. Welcome to my paid cider cart. All the cider costs money here. Why does everyone in this village seem to have the same sort of loose New Jersey accent? That's a great question. And some kind of eye? Is there… You know what?

Now that you mention it, we all do kind of have an eye thing. You know what I mean? Anyway, six ciders, that'll be one coin, please. Here you go, my good man. Thank you very much. He gives you the cider. One for six? I know, one coin? How much is a coin? The Dungeon World economy is very loose. I'll give you guys a quick… Let me take a quick… Because I can honestly never remember how much stuff costs. I mean, D&D has serious real money and we don't care about that at all.

There are silvers and coppers and… Russ tries every once in a while, but… I made them get a bank account. Wow. So here's an interesting thing. Bandages, which have three uses and cost five coins and heal four damage. That's five coins. A healing potion, which heals ten damage, is fifty coins. It's exponential growth. Yeah. A week's stay at a peasant inn is fourteen coins minus your charisma. Right, because you can be like, hey… What about a week's stay at a holiday inn? Hmm.

That's a civilized inn. They do have that. A week's stay at a civilized inn is thirty coins minus charisma. But if you stay there for two months, you get kind of a deal, because they don't have to clean as often, so it's a little bit less. Now what if you just want it hourly? Because you just enjoy jumping up and down on the beds. Yep. But you don't want to make your own bed. That actually costs a little bit more for discretion. You add your charisma score onto the price for that one.

God, can't a halfling just bounce on a bed? Only because I know what that means I'll say no. I've been to the halfling lands. I know what's up. I don't know. Where are halflings from in Faerun? It doesn't matter. Everywhere. Everywhere and nowhere. Oh. Interesting. Oh, yeah. They're kind of like a diaspora. Yeah. Cool. Yeah. They're all over the place. Got them in the hills, in the mountains. Under the ground. No, those are gnomes. In the trees. You can't tell me where I can live.

Sully starts digging. Are you going to halfling-splain? Yes. That's right. Sorry, I'll go back to my corner over here. You're the guy at the bartered cider booth. Oh, there's a bartered cider booth. It's in between the free cider and the paid cider. Hey, who's got a deal? Oh. Yeah, I got a bunch of this cheap, shitty cider. I'll give you this. Free cider for a bit of your ha-cider? Oh, yeah. We got the ha-cider over here. You can take it and you can trade it for funnel cakes later.

Billy, what do you think, bud? Oh, I would eat any kind of cake for sure. A funnel. Whatever other shapes exist. Cup? Great. As long as you give them the cup, they put the funnel cake in the cup. But then does it make it a cupcake? You're onto something. You're onto something. Yeah, so you kind of got the run of this fair. There's games. From what you can hear, there's a cider competition going on. Some sort of judge all the ciders deal and, you know, just general fair stuff.

Hey, what are you guys doing here? Well, you know, we heard that Murphy Vengabus bit the biscuit and well, the sign was a little confusing because someone read it to me but they said, my uncle? And so I'm like, hold on a second. We're going to have to fight someone for his uncle's stuff. That's what I think. So just be on your toes. We came to see the haunted house. Yeah, what he said.

In a more general sense, we're going to save the world and this is just like one stop in our grand scheme to save the world. But Glim, have you told him about Bahamut yet? Oh my God, you guys know about Bahamut? We've known you for five minutes and I can't believe she hasn't bonded up yet. Well, I mean, cider and I can talk about Bahamut if you guys want. Yeah. Oh yeah, please. I would like to a quick primer on Bahamut. Okay.

There's this really cool guy and his name's Bahamut and he basically like makes the world full of truth and justice and make sure all the good people are punished. No, no opposite that. Oh my God, this cider is going into my head. This is so embarrassing for Glim. Wow. Can we still record this forever? Look, look, that guy's doing caricatures. We need a picture of Glim fucking up a speech.

I guess the thing is usually people have walked away by now, so I don't usually get this far into my whole spiel about Bahamut, but you know, rewards the good, punishes the bad, maintains an equilibrium of truth and justice in the world. Is it like a dragon god? Yeah, well, I mean, he's a dragon, but sometimes he's an old man. You know gods. Totally. Yeah. Super chill. Totally. He's a really cool guy. Do you guys want to get one of those like potato potatoes? Yes, I do.

Do they do blooming onions here? Does anyone know? Oh, yeah. They saw blooming onions in the next row over. I'll go get a blooming onion with you. Yeah, they just grow in the ground honestly. They're just picked by a British guy. Blooming. Just rummage around in the ground and find a blooming onion. That's like a Mario 2 situation. Yeah, you pull it out. If you pull it quick enough, they're still warm. And if you lift it above your head, you get 20 gold.

Yeah, there's so you head to the food court area. There are all of the fried foods that you could imagine. There are rotato potatoes. There's regular potatoes, french fried potatoes, a variety of rats. Get your rats. There's a rat booth. Is he saying rats? It's a raps. Rat raps, I believe. Yeah, it looks like a rat inside a wrap. It's a rat. A rat wrap. Can you rap about the rat rap, please? In West Philadelphia, born and raised on the playgrounds where I learned rat raps. Yeah.

I can't use that. Just behind a paywall. This is on their show. Will Smith, if you got a problem, with us, Abdul will fight you on his front lawn. His address is Yeah. Get over here, Fresh Prince, and I will do you dirty. Fuck, I shouldn't have said that. I mean, he might come over now. Can I discern realities or spell Laura? Absolutely. Oh my God. It feels weird. Yeah, it does, doesn't it? Go ahead. So Spout Lore. Well, no, I guess discern realities.

We'll do a discern realities, which is 2d6 plus your wisdom modifier. Okay. Shit. Five. Straight up failure. Yeah. Okay. So your failure is you look around and you're like, man, something is fucking up with this place. And you notice that the the edge of the forest that your cart came through. You can't seem to find the path that brought you into this place. And the more you look around, you realize you can't really see a path that will bring you out of this place. Oh, fuck.

It's a side, isn't it? It's churning in here. No, it's not that it's do you guys see where the entrance where we came in was? Yeah, it was right over the what? Are we trapped here? Well, you know, I'm not totally surprised. It was an impenetrable tunnel. So that was the weird part. Yeah. Yeah. The fact we got in here is just completely amazing as it is. We should probably just enjoy it. That owl fucked with me. I make it what? Sorry, that owl. I think he had something to do with it. Okay.

Sully looks at Moonglum like this guy, a guy with a guy with a top hat and a coat with tails walks up to you and he's got like a domino mask across his eyes like one of those straight up black masks. It's like, hey, are you guys enjoying the midnight fair inside a festival? Yeah, but it's only like 8 p.m. So I think you need to get your time in. Or is it for mystery? It's more of a mystery kind of thing. It's like a branding operation. Anyways, would you guys like to play a game?

Can I see if he's like suspicious in any way? Yeah, you can discern realities. The man in the top hat and the mask? It doesn't seem suspicious at all. This guy seems normal. And I roll it with 2d6 plus wisdom. Six and then two. So that's nine total. All right. So that means you get one question out of the discern realities list. Okay. You just fully covered your camera like that to look at. And it's not on any of these sheets. I don't remember. It's fine.

The questions for discern realities are what here is useful or valuable to me? Who is really in control here? What here is not what it appears to be? That one. What here is not what it appears to be? Yeah, that's what I'm looking for. Okay. I'm using my binoculars mentally. Oh, the binoculars? Yeah, my mental binoculars. You realize that it's not that everybody in the different booths seems to be vaguely similar.

It's that they are all the same guy and he is running from booth to booth and putting on different disguises because he seems to be panting nonstop. I already knew that. All right. Billy is like Billy tells him he's just like, I'm sorry. I don't have anything new for you guys. But if you would let me finish if you would let me finish my sentence. All right. All of the sounds that you've been hearing people laughing people having a good time all the games being played bells and whistles.

You can see that there's a series of music bottles left all over the place and anything that you saw that you thought was people was like tricks of the light. So you're as far as you can tell the only ones here. Oh my gosh, you guys look over there but like not obviously those aren't empty cider bottles. It's a trap and tucked as a slow turnaround to discreetly look. It's like this. So this is weird. Super discreet. Great visual gag on an audio. It's perfect. Yeah. Yeah.

Dungeon fans will like that. They get it a lot. They get it. But what you do see is closer to the wooden painted facade of the haunted mansion. You see two figures and the guy standing in front of you who's like, do you want to play a game? Is it okay? You know what? Just bring out the nephew. I'll fight him and solve this whole thing. That is not the situation that you find yourself in my fine fellow. The game is not nephew fight. The game is not nephew fight. It's Sully's favorite game.

The nephew fight takes place at the midday festival, a midday fair and beer fest. Oh, yes. Brawling during midday is my favorite. That's when people fight the most we found. That's right. When the sun is its highest in the sky. That is the best time because you make a public scene. Yeah. There's no shadows. No one gets an unfair advantage. Do you guys have uncle race here? Uncle. I'm unfamiliar with that. What race is your uncle? What race is your uncle? Yeah.

It's where you try and guess what race an uncle is. I thought that was the one where you put the uncles in wheelbarrows and just go for it. I mean, that's what it is in the halfling lands. Right? Throw a bunch of halflings in a barrel or in a wheelbarrow. Yes. The uncles and all the nephews and nieces. You get to the river, you dump them in. Whoever dumps their uncles first. It's called dump-a-nunk. Exactly. You've played it before. You know what? Yeah. It's been so…

I haven't talked with another halfling in forever. It's been both so long and too soon. Yes. He didn't mean that. Yeah. Now I'm realizing that the halflings that are looking at each other look very different from one another. Yeah. Because Sully's kind of like slight and like lean and what? How tall would you say? Like three, three and a half? Three foot five. Wow. You are just absolutely… I'm towering above him. I love you. Statuesque. Thanks. You know, come from a tall family, I think.

So these are lifts a little bit too. So yeah. Oh, very nice. Some newspaper in there. Sully, correct me if I'm wrong, but do halflings have kind of a hobbit foot situation going on? Yeah. They're a little furry feet. Yeah. So Billy, this halfling also has large furry feet. You can't see him though. I put them in boots. Oh. I don't flaunt my foot situation. Oh, I love it. You can ask me about it if you want. You also got that on your certain reality. You could see through boots.

It's just right there. The Billnoculars have achieved an x-ray quality. I have to close them off because I'm like, well, I'm seeing too much now. Yeah, that's right. Be careful where you point those. Yeah. Just to clarify, you don't have to fight anybody's uncle. You merely have to spend a night in the haunted mansion of Count Murphy Vangabus. Are you Vangabus? Are you Vangabus? No, I'm not Vangabus. Prove it. Vangabus is dead, one. Vangabus is dead. Vang pokes him in the face.

He's trying to see if he's corporeal. I'm corporeal. Don't you worry. You get him in the eye once or twice. And two, the Count's nephew, Dremel Vangabus, is right over there. Sorry. We look over there. There's a guy in a dark robe with long, dark hair standing with another person who looks… Russ? Who looks very dapper. He's got tails, full tails, and a top hat, and a very pronounced beard. And he's panting. And it's the same guy you were just talking to. I've seen this guy before.

Okay, guys, there's something… I mean, obviously, we are going on here. Excuse me, sir, do you mind? I'm having a private conversation. Who, me? Yeah, you. I saw you leaning in. It wasn't anything weird I was trying to do. I was just trying to listen to your conversation. Is that a strange thing? If you've got time to lean, you've got time to clean. Now, shoot. Oh, goddamn, you're right. I got 50 booths I gotta clean. Somebody spilled cider all over there and peed on that barrel over there.

Don't ask me how I know. And he's off. Guys, something weird's going on. Something weird's going on here. Oh, yeah. Because, like, number one, you know, all the weird stuff that Billy said. But then, also, if the nephew's here, why is he giving away his uncle's fortune? And number three, what was the dress code for this festival? Because I feel like we kind of went, like, festival casual and, like, they're wearing top hats and tails. And I just…

I mean, I could have dressed up, but I didn't know. It's inconsiderate not to include it on the poster. Just put the dress code on the poster. If it's going to be black tie, that's fine. But just, like… But also, yeah, everything's totally weird. And, like, why is the nephew want us to… I guess we could go ask. Should we just go… I mean, are we doing anything? We just spend the night here? There's also, like, no way out, right? Like, we're trapped… That's a good point.

That's a great point. We're trapped in here, Mirror Dimension style. Anyone see the most recent What If episode for the Marvel What If series? I skipped it. He's doing fantasy shit. He's doing fantasy shit. He's doing fantasy shit. He's doing fantasy shit. The guy with the top hat and the domino mask is like, there's just too much Marvel stuff now. You know what I mean? It's kind of hard to keep up with everything. He saturated the market is what it has done.

It's like, I like an Avenger as much as the next guy, but do I really want to know what fucking Bucky's up to once he gets a haircut? I don't think so. He's very mopey, sir. Oh, as you guys are wandering over, that's not Dremel Vangabus. It's the guy with the top hat and the other guy. So many guys with top hats. Right? It's hard to keep track of all of them. Yeah. Okay. Man in front of the haunted mansion with a dark robe and a long, slick hair. Top hat, we know. No, no top hat.

His fingers are steepled in front of him, standing next to a dapper man in a top hat. Okay, wait. What are his nails like? Oh, good question. Perfectly manicured. Long, sharp. Serial killer. Yeah, right? Fuck this guy. Jesus. Yeah. This guy's a serial killer. Tuck says to the guy. I hear moot whisper in, and then I'm like, yeah, you're right. This guy is a serial killer. He presses his hand to his chest, and he goes, what? Me? A serial killer? Look, he's even got this serial killer accent.

I can assure you, fine folks, we are not serial killers. Why have you trapped us here? Where's the way out? I know not what you mean. You are not trapped. You have merely come to take advantage of an opportunity. I have no opportunity. Yeah, we already had the free cider. Ah, well, then there is a second opportunity. I had the Bloomin' Onion, man. The batter was quite wet. The guy said, let me fry it for you, and I said, no need, my friend. So it is a raw onion with a lot of wet beer back.

Tuck, you look over, and Tuck's beard is like caked. Just in dirt. Like cemented to your face. Now it's beard batter. What? It's beard batter. Oh, sorry. The man with the top hat leans in to what you can presume is the nephew and says, but why did we choose these people? It was not a choice, my good man. It was an opportunity presented to many. Anyone brave enough to take it has the chance of a lifetime. Unfortunately, few have taken that chance. So we are forced to accept whoever arrives.

Whoever arrives. I, Dremel, Dremel, I have to ask, why do you not just take your uncle's estate? Ah, my uncle, the Count Murfew Vengabus was a troubled man. He had many aspirations, which saw to his early end. I, myself, Dremel Vengabus, a lesser noble in the Vengabus family. I am wealthy beyond your wildest dreams, but what I love more than money. Is a spectacle. And so gross. From behind the nephew, two symbols clash together. Confetti cannon. Please tell them the rules of tonight.

Well, first you must enter the haunted house. Okay. Then you must spend the night in the haunted house. Okay. Uh-huh. Then, if you make it, you win. What was it they win? All of it? The haunted mansion. The haunted mansion. As well as the riches contained within. Yeah, hold on. This is a real estate situation. Like, okay, are we in a pocket dimension or does this mansion actually exist somewhere? I don't want a fucking house. I got to take up. The upkeep of this thing is going to be absolutely.

It's in the middle of a forest. I mean, come on. That guy over there, he will clean it for you. Ah, so it's more like a vacation home. Okay. Yeah, there's a guy with horn-rimmed glasses and a full-on janitor's jumpsuit and a mop and he's panting really hard and he gives you a thumbs up. Yeah, I'm going to clean the shit out of this place. Don't you worry. It comes with it. You know what? Why don't you just give the mansion to this guy? He's the hardest working guy in your crew.

He's working so hard. Yeah, small one. I have a question. What is the house haunted? Oh, that's a great question. Great question. The ghost. Thank you. I mean, not the ghost. No, the mansion is haunted by ghosts. Okay, that was kind of a given. That's it. That's it. Thank you, Edmund. But like, what kind of ghosts? Just a sort of general ghost. Ah, fuck this guy.

Edmund, as you've said, whoever stays one full evening inside my uncle's mansion receives the entire state as well as the inheritance contained and the riches contained within. Can we Spout Lore on the ghosts? Yeah, totally. You can Spout Lore about this whole situation. All right. So 2d6 plus intelligence, which is none of your strong suits. None. One. And one. Woo! You roll like me. Jessica. You guys can roll dice too, you know. Yeah, you know what though? I don't understand this game.

Oh, yeah. So I'm just gonna RP the shit out of this. That's the thing. Literally, if you tell me, just tell me something you wanna do. Okay. And I will tell you what move that is. And then you will roll it and I will tell you what happens after that result. Excellent. So I will just explain it to you as we go. Nice. So if your character has something they would like to achieve, let me know and we'll figure it out. You are so much more accommodating than Russ is gonna be.

I'm so sorry for your players. You know, I didn't wanna say anything, but… He's gonna make you play D&D. Okay, good to know. Thanks, Sean. Yeah. So yeah, actually, great question. So Moot, Glim, Sully, anything you wanna try and figure out while we're here? Not yet. Okay. I'm gonna wait till it's D&D before I start rolling things. No. Wait till we're on my home tour. And the minute we step through the door, is it gonna become D&D? D&D town? Pretty quick. Damn it.

The way it's gonna work is I'm gonna do the initial chunk of the house and then we'll switch and then Russ will take it home. Yeah, I think that sounds good. Unless we dick around on the front steps for a while. That's right. Unless we sample cider at like every booth in the hall. When he hears you say that, the guy in the janitor's outfit is like, please, no. He starts unzipping like real sad. He's just chugging a Gatorade trying to replenish his stomach. He does electrolytes.

He does a line of halfling white powder. All right. Okay, hold on. You said we're not trapped in here. No. But you've taken out the exits. No. I do not know what you speak of. We did nothing. You guys want to stay in the haunted house? I mean, you guys look like a bunch of accomplished, you know, useful weirdos. Yeah. Oh, sorry. I'm talking to my, the Sully moot and glim here. Oh, sorry. Yes, we will. We will go converse in the foyer.

They both sweep up the staircase, which I should say, they're talking about this place as if it's a grand palace, but it is very much a wooden painted facade of a mansion. I mean, you guys look like you can handle yourself. We know that we're down for whatever. What do you, like what? They're not letting us go. They're not giving us any information. Let's just sleep in this haunted mansion. Yeah. And then, okay. So, I mean, let's say we all come out alive. Well, yeah. Let's say that. Well, yeah.

No, that's what I'm saying. I'm saying it. Let's assume, let's assume we're all going to make it out alive. Are we going to work this thing like a timeshare or like? Yeah. How do we split the money? I mean, our daily rate is five gold coins a day. Yeah. Plus dental. So. So as long as we come out with at least that much, I think we're fine. 15 gold for the night. And then you guys can take the rest. I mean, your math is confusing, but okay. I mean, it doesn't.

Uh, hey, Hey, uh, Butler, whoever you are. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yeah. Uh, how, how many coins are in the prize bag in the inheritance? Well, I mean, did we count the coins? Uh, no, there's a, there, there's a vault. Uh, there's a paintings. There's a. So it's not just one bag with a dollar sign on it. No, no. We kept everything. Can I ask a related question? Yes. I don't really care about like worldly goods. I'm wondering if there's any sort of like pure of heart reason why we would be doing this.

Like, do the ghosts need to be free to go on to the great beyond or like any sort of. Sure. Oh, I mean, okay. Then I'm, I'm totally in. What do you guys think? I mean. Why did you put a facade up? I, I don't know what you mean. This is the, this is the mansion of count. The Murphy. You think of us? If, uh, if one of you want to, wants to maybe learn something about the situation. You can go ahead and roll a discern reality. I want it. I want to roll. All right. I want to discern reality.

So discern realities is 2d six plus your wisdom modifier. Of course. Russ gave me negative one. I mean, I did this sheet myself and I have a zero Tom. Let's just a quick check in on wisdom for our characters. Uh, wisdom got a solid zero. I made the match your D and D characters. Okay. Uh, I rolled a six minus one, six minus six minus one total. Yeah. Uh, that's a five and that's a failure.

So go ahead and take a point of experience that will, uh, evaporate into thin air at the end of our crossover. I was going to say, I don't even know where to put it on my sheet. Just put a check Mark there. And, uh, as you are trying to like, you're like kind of looking at everything, like something seems even more off about this place. Um, you're just like, nah, they've really, they've really got it together. I don't know. I don't know why, but this seems legit to me. Guys, I'm on board.

I don't know what it is about this place. Is it the facade gives me those, you know, nostalgic feelings of the way that fairs were when parents would probably take children there or something like that. We should definitely go inside. I agree. Let's go. Can we just walk? Like I start going up the there's steps. Hey. Yeah. There's like, there's front steps. It's about, you know, like 30, 40 steps. It's nothing huge. Uh, I mean, it seems like a lot of steps. There's a lot of stairs.

There you go, Billy. And, uh, something you notice as you're going up these steps is they're certainly moving a lot. Like they're definitely like, rickety as hell. Yeah. They feel like they're kind of bouncing a little bit as you're going up and the closer you get, you start hearing like, I don't know what you're doing. Cause Zoom's Yeah. Zoom did not want you to make that noise. Okay. Then you're kind of hearing this, like, like, wind. Wow. So can you stand?

It's so breezy up here from inside the house. It's definitely feels like it's coming from like the, basically the entryway, like Billy, Tuck and Bing, you're more familiar with this kind of technology. As you get closer to the front door, you see kind of like in a potted plant next to the doorway, you see another music bottle, like jammed in the dirt. And then you see a little bit of a cork off, and that's definitely where this like, wind sound is coming from. Can I take it? I want it.

Okay, sure. I'm taking the wind. We'll stay the night, but I'm taking the wind. You can just jam a cork in there and then, the wind sound stops completely. Right. Tuck steals the potted plant too. Great. So now you're just carrying- I mean, it's all going to be ours- Yup. At the end of the night, right? That's a positivity I love. That's a positivity I love.

And as you get up to the doorway, you hear like, creak, and the doors swing inward, revealing the yawning portal of the entryway to the mansion of Count Murphy Vengabus. Is it an actual portal? No, it's a doorway. Oh, okay. Can I discern realities? Yep, absolutely. One of you is going to get to discern realities eventually. Okay. Five failed. Jesus fucking Christ. Okay. It's dark in here. Yeah, it is. The three of you. Okay. So the three plus three, the six. I'm used to saying the three.

The six of you walk through the doorway, and as you get inside, you're struck by the deep gloom inside the entryway. And once the last of you steps through, the doors slam shut behind you. Boom. And complete pitch black darkness. And after a few seconds, a light starts to rise in the room, and you see, you know, one of those like double stairways that goes up to like a second floor door. You see one of those. You see a table covered in candelabras. Covered in candelabras. How many candelabras?

Give us one of these. Many menorahs? A table absolutely sagging under the weight of the candelabras that sit atop it. You see bookcases. You see a bookcase. You see a bookcase. You see a grandfather clock. Paintings on the wall. Two rooms to either side of you. And all of this is lit by what very much seems to be a series of black lights. Black lights? Wow. Yeah. Like there's white cobwebs on everything, and they're glowing bright under the light.

And there's like sticky spiders all over the place. Like plastic green glowing spiders. I'm starting to have the feeling that maybe this is a movie. Maybe this place isn't haunted at all. Yeah. Billy's gonna go. I'm going over to the cobwebs, and I start wrapping myself up in them. I'm like, dibs. I have this for my blanket. Billy, you don't even realize they're cobwebs, because you just grab them, because they look so soft. And it feels like the softest cotton.

Maybe a little artificial, but just such soft, like spun cotton. That's nice. And you get a little plastic spider. There's a little plastic spider wrapped up in it, too. Nice. So yeah, what do you all do? Hello! Hello! Hello! Hello! In response, you hear, Hello. Show yourself. Leave this place now before it's too late. Sorry, I didn't mean to interrupt you there, ghost. It's okay. I left a long enough gap between my initial ooh and when I started speaking. I just wasn't sure of you.

I'm gonna continue. But now, again, you must leave this place, place, place. Do you have like unfinished business we could help with? Or I'd really like to set your soul free. In life, I was a great, um… Fuck. This is what it actually sounds like. In life, I was an influential… Oh, fuck. Carpenter. I was a carpenter. And I was… As I constructed a home for my beloved and I to live in, I was crushed by a support beam. And that is my tragic backstory. That's really like a multiple person job.

I agree. It was not up to code. I mean, I'm willing to help whoever, but like between us, that doesn't really… Just like a safety standard issue, more than like a tragic backstory. But I mean… I mean, even if you really think about it, it's not something you can help me with. Instead, perhaps help me with this task. Ooh. Inside this room contains our three keys. The hands. The hands. Jazz hands. I know. I only see the one hand. So it's just… You start to… You start to…

At the top of the staircase behind the banister, you start to see a couple hands pop up doing like these twiddly fingers. That's some spirit fingers you got going on there. Inside this chamber, these chambers, three are contained keys. Also three required to unlock the door behind me. So there are three keys in each room or one key in each of the three rooms? Yes. Yes. Oh my God. That's not the same number. Moose, does that math add up to you? I don't even know what's going on.

All I know is this guy liked to party. Find the keys if you wish to continue or your fate shall be sealed like mine. And then it stands up behind the banister at the top of the staircase, glowing bright white. The brightest blinding white is a white sheet of a white sheet of white. And then it's like, I don't know what's going on. I don't know. It's a white sheet with holes cut in the eyes and two hands underneath. Doing this movement, this twiddly kind of sixties dance move.

I want to go- Find the keys- No, please go you first. I'm so sorry. No, please. I've done my thing. It's now your turn. I want to go up the stairs and just see how many keyholes are up there. Cause I don't know if we're looking for six keys or three keys. No, don't. Don't come back. Come up the stairs. Not yet. Can I dash up there and grab off his blanket? You certainly can. Okay. Try. So 2d6 plus dexterity. That'll be a defy danger.

I'm going to try and throw my spear and take the blanket off of him and just put the spear in the wall behind him. Not to the man, but you know. That's okay. No, no, no, no, no, no. But what you're saying is a thing that would be extremely difficult to do. The other thing that you would do, likely, is throw a spear into a man. Uh, whatever. He's a ghost. Yeah. He's a ghost, Sean. Ghosts can't feel spears. Yeah. And I said that. Oh, a ghost, eh? All right.

I don't think you know much about ghosts. Ghosts can't feel spears, Sean. Ghosts are impervious to spears. But they can lift sheets. We all know that. That's the thing. Everybody knows about ghosts is they're impervious to spears. I'm going to spear it. Okay. 2d6 plus. Spear. Plus your dexterity. Nice. My dexterity is 2, I think. Yeah. I got 9 in total. Okay. Use a little aid here. So I don't spear a man who's clearly not a ghost. Actually, let's see.

So aid in Dungeon World is you roll 2d6 plus your bond, which is another stat that Dungeon World has reflecting how close people are. I'm going to give you, I'm just going to say everybody's got a plus 1 in this because you've been palling around. You're in a situation now. We've been drinking together. Yeah, exactly. So if one of you wants to aid Ving in his spear throwing, tell me how you do it and then we will roll. I will go behind him.

I don't know how tall you are, but this is going to be awkward. I go behind him and like, like put my hand on his hand and like guide the spear. Oh my God. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. All right, so 2d6 plus bond, which will be plus one. So that's a 2d6, Amy. Ooh, that's a nine plus one is 10. Yes! Whoa! Finally! That makes it a plus 10. Thank you, Sully!

And that is a perfect aid. You're fitting right into the Spout Lore. No, you. So through the absolutely borderline sensual guidance of Sully, Ving, your spear flies true. And as the hands are raising up, creating sort of like a, you know, a bridge between the hand and the top of the head in the spear, your spear catches right in that shoulder area, ripping the sheet fully off. And you see a human body duck down beneath the banister and go, what are you doing? And then they go, huh?

And you hear somebody stumble through the back door. The doors at the top of the staircase swing open for a second and then slam shut. Seems like we don't need. We don't need any keys, so. You hear a, you hear a wonk and like a crackle. And then a voice seems to emanate from the room itself. It goes, just find the keys. It's totally normal to do that. I thought we were just supposed to sleep in this house. Yeah. There's slightly more to the situation. There always is.

Yeah, I wanted to go upstairs, but as I do, I want to play the game. Slightly. And I want to initiate trap expert. Oh, perfect. Yes. A trap expert is 2d6 plus dexterity. Okay. That's a seven. Okay. So you get one point of hold, which you can spend on trap expert to ask one of those questions. Okay. What else is hidden here? Ah, brilliant. You start like walking towards the staircase and you're looking around like this place is fucking weird.

And as you start walking towards the staircase, you see the grandfather clock has two regular clock hands, but one of the hands looks very strange. Oh, I go up to it. Is it a key? It's a key. Hey guys, I found a key. Wow. Oh, wow. Only two or five to go. One or the other. I guess if we're going to also play the game, I need to do quest, which means I dedicate myself to this mission. Oh, is Bahamut going to be jealous? No, no. Cause I do this by commuting with Bahamut.

I pull up that tool, keep the letter and I'm like, Bahamut, come on man. Just like help me out a little bit. We're staying in this place or maybe we're finding keys. I don't really know like exactly what the situation is. Something about a bad support beam. Either way, if you could just like do me a solid and get us through this, that would be dope. I forgot about quest. This could be a real, real problem for me. Oh, that's okay. I don't know how it works. So quest here's, this is fun.

We've never had a paladin in the game and our game is very low magic. So this is an interesting move. The paladin has the move quest. When you dedicate, actually, you know what, Carla, why don't you read it out? Sure. When you dedicate yourself to a mission through prayer and ritual cleansing, state what you set out to do. So I have some options with some blanks, slay blank, defend blank from blank, discover the truth of blank, which is maybe more what we're doing here. Yeah.

Then choose up to two boons, an unwavering sense of direction to blank invulnerability to pick one, a mark of divine authority senses that pierce lies. I don't even know what that means. It's very poetic though. A voice that transcends language, freedom from hunger, thirst, and sleep. So Carla's about to just end the game. I was going to say, anytime you need to pull the rip cord, just say, and now it's dungeons and drag.

I'm feeling it's about to, it's about to end, but cause I, there's one I'm looking at that's just like, well, yeah. Okay. So what do you, what would you choose for your two boons? Um, I don't care about freedom from hunger, thirst, and sleep. I mean, there's so much free cider, right? Exactly. I still have a lot of blooming onion with me. Yeah. Things looking, talks beard in a platonic way. Oh yeah. Open mouth though.

Uh, I probably want senses that Pierce lies and probably an unwavering sense of direction to keys. Yep. That'll do it. That'll do it. Wow. No wonder you never showed us this move before. Sorry. I shouldn't have read the sheet. Maybe that was your first mistake. Maybe I've ruined everything. An unwavering sense of direction to keys. God damn it. Uh, so, yeah, you pray to Bahamut. You say, Hey Bahamut, I'm in a haunted house. Can you help me out? Then you hear the voice of Bahamut in your ear.

That's like been there. No problem. And your eyes take on the sites in a new light and you see just how fucking shabby this place is for the first time. The craft in this place is of middling to poor quality. It's all covered with like an overabundance of Halloween ish. Decorations and the black light makes things scarier than they would look normally because it's all like plywood and paint. You look over at tuck and he's eating a bowl of peeled grapes. That's the eyeballs on the side.

The witch's eyeballs. Yeah. Oh, these are just grapes. Fuck. I wanted these to be eyeballs. That would have been so metal. Yeah. Billy's like arm deep in a bowl that says brains, but it's just spaghetti. Yeah. I'm really going to town even though I'm really full. So, I'm panting. I'm also panting a lot. Gotta make room for all this. Be a hero, Billy. Be a hero. I'm just like talking to myself, talking myself up. Try and make myself feel better about this haunted night we're going to have.

That's what heroes do. Yeah. And your eyes are drawn. Bahamut whispering in your ear. Hey, go to the dining room. He's just playing hot and cold. He's like, warmer, warmer, colder, colder. No, that's exactly what's happening. Bahamut doesn't get a lot of prayers that involve haunted houses. So, he's into this one. Pretty good time. Yeah. Go to the dining room. Yeah. I'm just going to, I'm just going to head into the dining room. I got a bit of a feeling.

Bahamut's kind of giving me some key vibes. Okay. From in there. All right. So, where do you think it is? There's, I'm going to pull out the chair at the head of the table. Oh, you're close. Okay. And then kind of duck under the table. No, cold, cold. Oh, oh. Cold. I pull out each chair and look at the seat. As you get closer to the middle of the table, where the table settings are, there's like a serving dish in the middle with like the silver, like kind of lid.

And Bahamut's like, hot, hot, burning hot. So fucking, it's right. It's, you're so close. You're so close. And I lift it up. Ta-da. There it is. And there's a key underneath. I like the Bahamut's coming to you as like a surfer dude. It's kind of right. This is. Bahamut. No spoilers, but this is what every dragon we've ever met has sounded like. So this is. Fair enough. This is as close as I've gotten. I love it. And yeah, so Glim has found another key under the serving dish. That's two keys.

And Bahamut is also like, look, let's just fucking speed run this. There's, go to the library. Okay. Library. Let's go. I feel like we're all following behind her. Yeah. Yeah. We're bored. I'm just like, Oh God, I'm fingers rolling as hard. So he's shape-shifting his eyes to roll so hard. See, I told you guys about him. It was so cool. Just go to the library and here you go. Look, where do you think it is? Oh, nevermind.

And, uh, Bahamut seeing through your eyes, sees a ghost, a sheet ghost sitting on a chair with a cup of cider in its hand with like the sheet lifted up and you can see a mouth underneath. And then it looks like, oh, everybody goes, Oh fuck. Ooh. Got this asshole again. It's, uh, another. Is it Dremel? Do we recognize him? No, you actually don't recognize the face underneath. Is this Tillium Yup? There's no way to know for sure. That's a yes. And Bahamut's like, uh, that dude just has the key.

Oh, um, excuse me. Excuse. Do you have a key? Do you have a key? Do you have a key? Do you have a key? Do you have a key? Do you have a key? Do you have a key? Do you have a key? Do you have a key? Do you have a key? Do you have a key? Could just have, I mean, maybe, maybe you forgot to hide it or something. Like I won't tell your boss or anything. It's totally fine. Like just. No, the keys are, are hidden amongst the. Oh fuck. Yeah. Shit. Could you turn around for a second? Yeah. Yeah. Totally.

Totally. Yeah. All six of us turn around like, I'll leave this guy's dignity a little bit, I guess. And can Tuck do the look behind again? Yeah. Yeah. Yes. He does another one of these. Oh, God. We got to watch him go through this whole thing. False start. False start, everyone. No, he wants to look extra hard. Oh, my God. Tuck, as you're turning around, stretching your eyelids open so you can see extra hard, you hear a quick shuffling.

And as you turn back, you see the ghost twiddling its hands. So much. Of course it hurts, Abdul. You're stretching your eyes out. I cannot look. Oh, my God. You look like a vizier. You look like a vizier. Abdul, we're trying to make a good impression. You look like Jafar. You look like Jafar. He's locked into it now. He can't look. No. Give me your secrets, ghost man. Give me your secrets. Someone patted him on the back when he was doing this. Now he's stuck like this.

His eyes are going to fall out if you hit him too hard. No. I hope he doesn't sneeze. Oh, my God. It hurts. Shit. I know. It's hurting my heart. I can't. Abdul. I can't look at it. You got to stop, dude. I hate this. Now say, seek thee out the diamond in the rough. Just say it. The diamond in the rough. It is. Why, it's the vizier. Why, that would be me. Okay, Jossie. Jossie's going to get us. Stop it. I'll show you just how snake-like I can be. There is a… Someone fucking screeched.

I already did. It's already… Oh, my God. Imagine that made me go blind. So, as when you turn around, Tuck, after you hear a quick shuffling, you turn around and you see the ghost standing next to the bookcase, twiddling its hands, and one of the books is like halfway out of the shelf. Oh, my God. Oh, my God. Oh, my God. Oh, my God. Oh, my God. Oh, my God. Oh, my God. Oh, my God. Oh, my God. Oh, my God. Oh, my God. Oh, my God. It's like, wherever could the third key be?

Tuck walks up and smashes up the shelf with his axe and grabs the book. The ghost jumps to the side to avoid the cascade of books that you knock off the shelf. Oh, you found the third key. I found it. It's in this copy of Love and Lust. Congratulations. Now, continue on into the mansion you made. Yay. We do. Yeah, and we're all, goodbye. See you later. And this ghost ducks out the door behind him and slams it shut.

And when you go out into the foyer, there's another ghost standing at the top of the staircase. Well done. Now, through this door, you can walk deeper into the mansion of Count Murphy Vangerbosch. Is his sheet ripped? It's a little ripped. But they're standing right in front of him. They're standing right in front of you as you get to the top of the stairs. Congratulations. What now will you do? You gotta, you're like, right. If we could just scooch. We're just gonna.

And we awkwardly, like, walk too close to you around you. It's like, do I go, like, on the front? Or do I go in the back? Is it back to back? Is it front to front? I don't know. As you're walking through, Tuck, you step on the sheet. Like, full on. Just right on top of the sheet. Yeah. And there's a book. A bit of a, oh, whoa. And the sheet comes fully off. And there's no one there. What? Well, that was pretty cool. And that's where we're gonna end it for this week.

I've been your Game Master, Sean O'Hara. Joining me as always, playing Tacoma Dome, the Barbarian of Dual Aziz. And Tuck is eating, like, the grapes. And he's like, no, fuck it. Playing Ving, the half-elf druid, Paul Hoppers. He's like, Ving's really scared. And he puts the blanket that he got, like, over his head. Like, hold on. Hold it up. Like, oh, my God. He's a ghost. Playing Fat Billy, the Halfling Thief, Jessica Tai. And Billy got so scared that he fell all the way down the stairs.

And he's gonna have to climb back up. Oh, no. And playing Nerexius Acra, a.k.a. Glim, the Dragonborn Paladin, Carla Maxted. And Glim's like, kisses her hands and kind of puts them to the sky. Like, thanks, Bob. I'm mad. I knew you'd have your girl. Playing Sullivan Slight, the Halfling Rogue, Amy. Sully walks up to the door, looks at it, and goes, I could just pick these lots. It's, like, not a problem. Why the hell? Playing Moot, the Half-Orc Sorcerer, Tom Laird.

Moot picked up the Forgotten About Spaghetti and is just going to town on it. And joining me is Mr. Edmund Tour, manservant to Dremel Murphy, Russ Moore. Edmund's sitting in a back room somewhere being like, I thought we planned a haunted house. Well, Dungeons and Dragons. Dungeons and Dragons is going to be very different. And that is it for this half of the Dungeons and Dragons slash Spell Lord crossover.

If you want to check out the other half and see how the haunted mansion of Count Murphy Vengabus ends, head over to Dungeons and Dragons for the rest of the adventure. We'll see you next time. Ha ha ha! And so ends the tale of Adventures Three, who tried the best they can. Though dumb and scared and lost they be, for time's abreast in revelry. And though our journey may be like a conclusion, we will not leave you without a resolution. Return next week to hear some more.

Whilst you commute or do your chores. And for you I'd gladly spell Lord. Hey Spellorians, Abdul here with an end of episode reminder that if you want to get over to the Dungeons and Dragons feed to hear the rest of their episode, the link is in the show notes. Thanks so much for listening everybody. Goodbye.

Hey, Tuck here telling you that without people like you listening to the show and giving us some money, this show wouldn't have happened. Well, it did happen, but it wouldn't be continuing to happen. So if you want to donate and also listen to some bonus stuff, a lot of bonus stuff. Holy shit, like 50 hours of bonus stuff. You can go to speltlore.com slash money, please, or patreon.com slash speltlore. And tell them Tuck sent you. Tuck is the Brute. He knows not his home. He loves to play.

He'll sing and fight. Thing is half-elf. He shifts his shape and wields a spear with great might. Billy's a thief. His tiny size does mask the largest heart. Best and brightest they may not be, but their friendship outweighs their smarts. So gather round, friends, and listen close. For the tale's about to start. Hello, everybody. And welcome back to the show. Welcome to Spout Lore. I'm your game master, Sean O'Hara. And joining me as always playing Ving, the half-elf druid, Paul Oppers.

Hello there. Playing Tacoma Dome, the barbarian, Abdul Aziz. Hello. Currently had a mouthful of cold brew as I started talking. And playing Fat Billy, the halfling thief, Jusketai. Hello. When last we left our heroes, they were interrogating an erstwhile member of the Medjay, a hapless fellow named Erk, at the very, very tippy top of the… Lighthouse of McCall. And in the middle of that interrogation, we got an insight into the ritual that Ving endured, survived. Yeah. Yeah.

Initially, we believed undertook, but it sounds more like got through barely. Yeah. And then forgot by accident. Yeah. Through. Was like pushed out of his brain due to the intense trauma of the ritual itself. After that, and some threatening by Tuck to just drop him off. This dude from the top of a 1000 foot high lighthouse.

Billy was able to convince this man via supernatural pinky swear to track down whatever text the Medjay keep that might help them unravel the mysteries of the ritual and to not tell anybody that he's doing it under punishment of Billy knowing immediately where he is at the time and that he has broken that promise. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. In case this dude tweets out what they're trying to do and then they'll be ready to track him down. Uh, after that they desperately scaled down the side of the lighthouse of McCall. Is that what you call that leaving a path of destruction down the side. But I mean that place, that thing's probably pretty fucked up already. The lighthouse. Yeah. I mean the outside's probably kind of fucked. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. It's a thousand years old and has not been maintained. Yeah, yeah, yeah. That makes sense. And there's probably, you know, like generations of graffiti and stuff like that carved into the side. They have been trying to like build it back up. There's like a heritage committee. There's guys down there like, what the fuck? Who does this? This is so ancient. There's a bunch of fucking axe marks down there now. What the hell?

And then they crashed through the roof of the shack of an old man named Greg Gregorius Gregory III in his rat petunia. And then they shared a little bit of soup and headed back to the library itself. Just before they headed back to the library, Ving popped into the perceptions of one Ama Margani via Eye of the Tiger to see what was going on. And we got a little bit of an insight to a tea party between Ama and Farhan. And also… Oh, I love it. I love the tiny table giant man. Yeah.

Medically recovering bully and former light guard enforcer, leader of the Immolators, Fatim, who seems to be recovering physically, but not very well emotionally right now. He seems to have come to terms with the fact that the torch was a piece of shit. Well, that and I mean, you know, I'm sure that you guys have been thinking about this, although Tuck did make himself dumber. So it's hard to say if he actually has been. I've been thinking about this.

Fatim was serving the demon of zealotry for years. So it's hard to say he's a bad. He was a bad dude for sure. Fatim was an asshole. He was a cruel person. But it's hard to say how much of what he's done over the last several years was him and how much was the demon of zealotry influencing him. It's also like was during, you know, the more formative years of his life, like mid to late 20s where you're like… That's when you kind of become an okay person a lot of the time.

Or at least lock in the person you think you are. Yeah. And then he probably thought he did. He was like, I'm the hammer of God. And I, you know, I enforced the will of the church. And then when Tuck came to town, he started telling people he was the axe of God. Yeah, he started to take my thing. And then he had that veil ripped away. And he had that influence purged from his mind. So he's like, fuck, what? What am I? If I'm not that, what am I? Classic 33 year old. Totally.

Now that he's like approaching 30, he's like, oh, man. And then, yeah, you headed back to the library and felt safe for the first time in a few days. Had some late night snacks and talked to Farah Margani, master librarian, and kind of gave her the down low on everything except for the attempted possession. There's a ton of work to be done. Of one Pellan guaranteed Corbin. Yeah, we didn't get to that because she got fucking pissed.

Because Billy realized that in escaping from the lighthouse, he forgot at the very top, he lost a library book, which very likely would signal to the Magi, if they find it, who you are working with. I wonder if that will happen. Yeah, nothing to do with like that flashback. Yeah, we got a little post credit scene. Yeah. Oh, and I mean, like, yeah, that's probably what Farah was talking about. But she's also just probably mad that you took a book out of the library. Yeah, she's a librarian.

Yeah, that's like because she said before, do not take books from the library. Thank you for saving my great many times great grandfather and saving the library. Do not remove the books from the premises. Yeah, it broke a big rule. Yeah, the only rule really we were given. We were given pretty free reign. And that is where we find our heroes. Now, Farah has walked out. Perel has gone to the medical wing long ago to rest after getting fucking worked over.

And here you are sitting in the semi empty cafeteria. Billy, you should go apologize. Yeah. So I get off the bench and I and I am scurrying down the hall after Farah. Yeah, you see her. She's walking ahead quite briskly. Farah, wait. She doesn't stop. Initially. I pick up speed. Farah. I'm running too fast to say anything. She does stop after a few more minutes of you chasing her minutes. Unbroken minutes of you chasing her. I trip. I am crying. Then she stops. I'm so sorry.

I know I did a big mistake by taking the book. But I only took it. A long time ago. And honestly, I forgot I had it because I have so many things in my bag all the time. And I'm sorry. I forgot it. I'll never take another book again. And it wasn't even that important of a book. Probably. She stops you there. She says with much less warmth in her voice than you're used to. We are not only an institution of learning. We are a safeguard against the law.

We are a source of loss and abuse of knowledge. By removing that text from these walls, you have betrayed not only my life's calling, but the life's calling of every individual that has ever come here to learn and protect the written word. Oh my God. Billy is speechless. Like I, Jessica, am feeling ashamed. You have undoubtedly. And she hasn't knelt down like you're used to adults doing.

To you when they like you, she's standing full height above you, which is not super tall, but for you, it's like, holy shit. She's huge. You have undoubtedly done a great service to this library and to me personally, as I have said. If this book is not recovered. And she's like, she is kind of speechless a little bit. She's like, it will irrevocably change how I feel about you. But I understand that you are. For all. Sense and purpose as a child.

That your decision making skills perhaps are not as full as mine. And your respect for knowledge is perhaps not as strong as mine. I would like your promise that you will do everything in your power to recover this book. I offer her a pinky promise. Are you othing yourself? I'm othing myself. Whoa. Okay. Okay. Spend the point. Okay. And she kneels down and she extends her pinky to you. Pinky promise. You promise to recover this book. I will give up my life before I don't recover this book. Whoa.

It's the first time I've ever did a promise. So I'm not very eloquent. Sean O'Hara asking, are you saying that if you don't recover this book, Billy will die? I guess. All right. Oh. And she says, I accept. Okay. Does Farrah realize the gravity of what she just did? She does. Billy tried to get her to pinky promise earlier when she, when he was like, promise you won't be mad. And she was like, I'm not going to promise you anything, Billy. Whoa. Like she realizes.

I feel like Billy is, he has never felt like the disappointment of someone that he like loves and respects. And because he's such a traumatized and like love starved little boy, he's like, I will do anything. To get this back. And also his parents are so fucking permissive. Yeah. He's never run up against something. She dusts her knees off after kneeling on the floor and she nods and you can feel a little bit of the warmth come back to her voice.

And she's like, I understand the gravity of the promise that you just made. And I appreciate your commitment to writing this wrong. We will consider the matter tabled. And when the book is returned, then all of us will be able to write it. And all will be well. But please, I'm begging you, do not steal any more books. I will never steal another book again. And if any of your friends have books that they have stolen and have not told me, please ask them to return them. Okay.

I am going to return to my quarters. Okay. Good night. Good night. And she pads away. I run back to the cafeteria. And things there going through like a pile of like herbal. Books and just looking around really sketchily like field guides and I'm sliding them into his hair. Billy slaps the book out of your hand. Billy. Do not steal the books from the library. Okay, pal. Give them back. Did Farrah, was Farrah really mad at you? Yes. What happened? I can't talk about right now.

And Billy like goes to the, I guess like the. The icebox and he packs some like little water cups and like protein shakes. Oh, Billy's leaving right now. Yeah. What you doing, pal? I'm just like, it's really tired and I want to go to bed right now. You're taking bed snacks. Yes. Cause I'm really sleepy and I, and I know I'm going to have a long sleep. So I need a lot of energy for it. Usually when you're really sleepy, you just fall asleep wherever you are.

But I'm like extra, like I'm really a special sleep. Yeah. You're kind of quivering a little bit. Yeah. I, I, it's just cause I'm so tired that I, that, that I'm moving a lot. It's my body being like, hurry up, go to bed. And Tex just like, okay, Billy, you're going to go to bed. Yeah. Okay. And I will sleep for a long time and it's okay. And then find us in the morning. Okay. Yep. Okay. Sweet dreams, Billy. I love you. I love you too. Good night. Love you. Billy like shrinks away.

Elbows up in his arms, hanging at his side as he scuttles. Okay. Interesting. Actually, I just have a quick question. Are we doing like Billy out on the town by himself? Like adventure? Yeah. I got to go get this book. Cool. Yeah. After Billy, like bust out of the room, uh, text, like he's for sure going to leave the library. Oh, definitely. A hundred percent. That is not his going, going to bed. Walk. All right. There we go. Nevermind.

Then it might not be a Billy on his own adventure after all. Okay. Literally the most conspicuous, like came into the cafeteria, said, I'm going to bed now. As he grabbed dungeon rations out of the freezer. Yeah. Okay. That answers every question that I just had. Where the second he leaves, you all get up and you start grabbing your shit and you're like, Billy's going to try and get out. When you said that. Yeah. Ving was packing water bottles into a backpack, filling his camel bag.

Wait, should we go after him or should we let him deal with this? We should go after him. We should definitely, we'll let him deal with it from a distance. Yeah. A respectful distance. We'll hover a distance away if we can keep up with him. Wow. This is like your kid, uh, going to like, like walking to school, walking to school for the first time alone. And us in a helicopter directly above him. Yes. Um, so where would Billy go to get out of here? Yeah. Yeah.

Like, are you going back to basically the motor pool, like the sand boat? Yeah. Um, who was the driver again? Uh, the driver was, uh, he was handlebar mustache. Remember? That was a, that was a joke. No. All right. No. Yeah. Yeah. I was mainly just imagining Hulk Hogan. Yeah. Like a blonde handlebar mustache. Uh-huh. A flat butt and bags under his eyes. Bald with like long hair, long blonde hair. Okay. Way less racist for sure. No. More racist. Okay. He sees Billy and he goes, ew, a halfling.

Can you get away from me? Uh, yeah. Bulko is in the, um, boat launch and he's working on the sand boat that he brought you back in. Bulko. Hey, it's me, Billy. What's up little brother? Um, it's a big emergency. We need to go back to the sticks right now. Uh. Right now. Right now. Farrah told me so. Well, I don't know if I should be letting you a little unattended little kid. No. Don't you usually have two other dudes that are with you? Yeah, but they told me I can go.

They gave express permission and they said, we want you to go alone, Billy. We don't want to go. We are very tired and we trust you. And come back to us. We're around the corner listening to this conversation. I can't believe he actually gets away with this shit. People believe him. Such a fucking liar. Fuck. He doesn't get that from me. He does not get it from me. I don't lie. Who does he get that from? I don't know. Maybe it's the guy that lost us 98 coins. Whoever that is. And the tech looks.

They're stuck in like a wide. Looks at me. Tilt his head forward. Tilt more. And by being in this argument, we have missed most of the conversation. Yeah, totally. Billy, you're going to have to either roll a defy danger charisma or perhaps spend a fairy hold. But that might be. Yeah. Okay. Cool. Rolling charisma. Okay. Oh, boy. It's fine. Five plus two is seven. Five plus two is seven. Billy's like hands and knees. Eyes closed. Please. Please. Please. Please. Please. Please. I don't know.

Let's go. Let's go. I've gotten in a lot of trouble in the past for taking people out into the desert with not enough clearance. I'm on thin ice. Little brother. No. Farrah said. And she also said a long time ago that we are basically like the boss of this library. So like, I'm your boss. So please. But like, I'd be really nice about it. All right. All right. All right. Holy shit. Just shut up. Okay. All right. All right. I'm not sure that I can let you. Out of. The boat.

Like, I can take you to McCall and I can take you. I'm going to have to come with you is what I'm saying. I can't let you go unattended. Okay. Fine. Billy agrees, but he's definitely going to like shake him off. Yeah, totally. Okay. So Bulko grabs his sand boating gear, which is like a big heavy scarf that goes around his neck goggles. Because you know how sand boats have like just a slit that you look through.

So he's got his goggles, his hat, his scarf, and he wears a librarian's robe, but the sleeves have been ripped off. Cool. So it's like all jagged on the sides and he's got real huge tanned muscles. Nice. And a tattoo that says books. This guy's fucking rad. This guy's the only nerd that Tuck has ever respected. Yeah. He's a sand boat driver, but he is a librarian. And he's like, all right, let's get out of here. Hop in. I'm already in. Oh, I'm sorry. I didn't see you go. You're so quick.

Oh, that's fine. Let's go. All right. And he hops in, clangs the hat shut. And he kicks his foot out of the sand boat onto the ground and kicks the lever that starts the funicular that can we run up and latch on somehow. Should we run up and latch on or steal a different sand boat? Oh, yeah. I'd be fun to try and talk somebody else into taking us up to the surface. Yeah. So, Billy, you're heading up and he's like, okay, if you don't mind, I might let the sales out a little bit on this one.

What do you say? Like, make it fast. Oh, yeah. Oh, please do. I've been working on a little something. Cool. With what's his boat called? Big Mama. Oh, yeah. I've been working on a little something with Big Mama that I think you're going to like. And yeah, you're heading up and out. Tuck and Ving, you see Bulko's sand boat, Big Mama, heading up and out of the boat launch. What do you do? We run up to the other sand boat guy who's washing down one of his sand boats. Yeah.

He's just hosing it down. He's got one of those sand boats. He's got one of those, like, pump things that, like, before, you know, pressure hoses existed. He just got a big container full of water and a pump and he's just blasting sand off of it. Hey, Nacho Man. Who's this guy? Randy. Randy. Oh, because you're going for it. Yeah. Randy Nacho Man. Savage. Randy Savage. Yeah. Nacho Man. Randy Savage Nacho Man. Yeah. No Nacho Man. Just Randy Savage. Randy Savage. Hello. Hello.

It's me, Randy Savage. What can I do for you today, fine gentleman? This guy's so distinguished. I love it. He's still huge and he has, like, sunglasses that cover his whole face and he's got a big beard and a cowboy hat. What can I do for you this fine evening? Spray, spray, spray. We need to get up to the surface. Post haste. Very well. Hop in. I have no reason to disbelieve you. You're two reasonable adults. Jessica just threw her arms up there. What the fuck? Yeah. I asked the wrong person.

No. Billy is a child. If a truck driver was at a truck stop and some adults were like, hey, we're just hitchhiking. We need to get to the next town. They're more likely to say yes than if a kid runs up and is like, we got to go right now. This is a hate crime. Okay. Yeah. And Randy's like, let's go. Where to? Follow that sand boat, Tuck says. Post haste. Post haste. And Randy hops into. His sand boat kicks the lever and the funicular heads up to the top, the boat launch.

And Billy, you come out of the launch with Bolko and he pilots it out to the edge of Elaine Springs. And he's like, all right, you ready? Absolutely. Okay. Here we go. And he reaches over and pushes like a lever forward and you hear mechanisms above you like in the sail extend outward, like two arms come out to make a really big sail. And then you hear something rumbling inside the boat itself and it's moving under power. Like it's got like a, some sort of weird thing that's pushing it forward.

Whoa. And then he's like, okay, here we go. And it starts picking up speed. And then you feel the desert wind catches extra large sail and it's like hitting fucking hyperdrive. Like you just get thrown backwards. Yeah. Billy's cheeks like flapping the wind and he's gripping on to the front of the seat so hard. And he's like, oh, my God. Fuck yeah. I'm going to get that book so soon. Yeah. Does Billy have little goggles on? Yeah. Tiny goggles. Yeah. And Bogle's like, oh, yeah.

It's a Tim Allen sound. I couldn't remember if there was a sound that Hulk Hogan made. So it was kind of Tim Allen, kind of macho man. And you're fucking ripping ass through the nighttime desert. Tuck and Ving, you come out of the boat launch with Randy. Oh, with that? Yeah. Yeah. It's such a much calmer affair. Yeah. He turns over and he's like, can I interest you in some in-cabin coffee? Lovely. No, just follow that boat, man. Which boat? The one that's fucking getting away.

And you look and you can barely see it on the horizon. And Randy's like, my word. And he it takes a lot longer because he doesn't have a motor in his. So it just like slowly gets he gets out and pushes it into the sands. No, no, no. Fuck. Can you get some fucking? Wind? Yeah. Just a moment. We have to get out into the sands. I don't want to damage cream of the crop while he's behind there pushing it. I want to see if I can get a big Gus and we can leave this guy in the dust. All right.

Dustin Gus. Holy shit. My God. Twelve. All right. What's a twelve on elemental mastery? Get you. I think I only get two from the list below. The effect comes to pass. Avoid paying nature's price. Retain control. So I'll get effect comes to pass and I'll retain control. Okay. So nature's price. We're back, back, back again. What? What is nature's price? I mean, it could always just be damaged. It can just be damaged. It can totally just be like, what's your damage? A D eight. Oh no. It's six.

The elements. It's a D 10. Oh shit. So if you want to roll me a D 10, this is the act of hanging onto the, yeah, you get up on the top, like to be like, fuck this. Two, two. Great. Yeah. So you only take two damage as the, as the, the wind whips so hard that you can feel like it tearing at your skin. Oh, my God. Oh, my God. Oh, my God. Oh, my God. Tuck's cheeks are… As the boat lurches forward, the sail unfurls forcefully, and you hear Randy go, Now hold on. He's gone.

As you whip out of the desert, Tuck, you're driving, apparently. Oh, yeah, and I call off the back, Sorry, we'll bring it back in one piece, we promise. Bye! Yeah, and you carry on. Bing, I assume that you're going to pilot as a former sand sailor? Yeah. Yeah. I'm not going to make you roll to pilot because you've driven a boat before. And, Billy, you're hanging on to the front of a seat, legs flapping behind like a little flag, and you hear Bulko go, What the hell's that? What? Where?

Some sort of squall kicking up behind us. I'm just going to take a quick look. Can you hold the wheel? Sure. Can you carry me? He grabs you from where you are, flapping on the back of the seat, and just picks you up and puts you on the wheel. Yeah, so I tuck my legs into the wheel, like I'm sitting on a chair swing, and then I hold… I hold the wheel. So I'm just like, here we go. Effectively doing nothing. Yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Just using my body weight to…

And he pops the hatch and stands up and squints. He gets a mouthful of sand, and he's like, somebody's following us. Oh. Billy knows immediately. No! Oh, no! Oh, I think it's just my parents. Your parents, the ones that you said were fine with you coming? Yeah, they're totally fine with it. They just like… I probably just like forgot my backpack or something. Should we stop? No. It's not that important. All right, whatever you say, little brother.

And he slams the hatch shut, picks you up off the wheel, and keeps going. And it's going to take you like… What's the ride we usually say? It's like two hours to get kind of around McCall into the library? Yeah, but I guess with his turbo speed, it's probably like 40 minutes. Yeah, you're going to do it in 40 minutes easy. Yeah, he's really proud of that time. Oh, he's like, are you timing it? Yeah. It's going to be so fast. I could even go to the far side of McCall.

I could go to the north side if you want. We don't even… If I get to the north side, it's going to take like 10 extra minutes. That's crazy, right? I mean, whatever is closest to the lighthouse. All right, fine. I'll just take you to the south side, whatever. Thank you. And Balco sits down. In no time flat, you see the city of McCall rising up before you. And he goes, all right, hold on. Okay. And he pulls a bunch of levers, and the boat starts slowing immediately.

And he's basically like e-brake turning it. Everything's shaking. The boat sounds like it's going to rattle apart. Yeah. His monster energy drink falls off the dashboard. And he basically e-brake turns into just a bunch of houses that are built on the very edge of the desert. And he almost hits a pen full of goats. In fact, you hear it tap the latch, and the gate opens, and all the goats get out. Billy is like so bruised, because it's just… He's been like ping-ponging around the hatch.

And he's like, nice. Like he pops out of the hatch. He's like, thanks, Balco. Hey, happy to help little brother. He takes his goggles off. And where he was totally brown from the sand, he's just like nice and pink under the goggles. All right. If you need a ride back, are you good? Wait, no. I said I was going to come with you. I forgot. Fuck. Fuck. We have fairy dust him. That's… Oh, you're going to put him to sleep? Yeah. Because then I know I have a ride back, but he can't follow me.

God, Billy's like off the chain right now. Yeah. This is Billy with no supervision. Oh, man. He's an animal. Okay. So fairy dust is 2d6 plus charisma? Sure. Okay. Balco, can you just like… I think I dropped something under the chair. Can you have a look? Oh, no problem. There's a lot of stuff under this chair, though. It might take me a sec. Okay. And he starts digging around. Seven. Okay. So you get one from the list. The list is… It affects a group of people.

They stay asleep for a good amount of time. You can do it from a distance. I have to get really close. So I'm like… Okay. I'm like leaning over him, like hands on his shoulder, like, oh, it's like really under there. And then I'm going to choose that he falls asleep for a long time. Okay. So as he's like bent over, like shoulder deep under the seat, pulling out like copper book romance novels and like a little… One of those rubber, slappy, sticky hands. He's just like, nope, nope, nope.

And you just, what, blow a bunch of dust in his face? Yeah, basically. I go… In his face. He goes, oh, come on, little brother. Good night. Have a good nap. I'll see you later. Cute. And when he goes… And his handlebar mustache flips out from his face and lands back down. I pull his shawl over him and like tuck him in so he's comfy. Mm-hmm. And I hop out of the boat. All right. And it's dark out. Yeah. It's nighttime. Mm-hmm.

And the moon is obscured by like clouds, so it's not as bright as it usually is. The only real light is the occasional worm glass in the cliffside and the light at the top of the lighthouse of McCall. So yeah, just like tightens up his satchel, his backpack, and off we go. Mm-hmm. Cut back to Tuck and Ving. You are absolutely hauling ass on this sandboat. You can feel the wind, the wind unnaturally, like almost picking the boat up off the ground. We're getting air. Yeah, exactly.

You can feel it. The boat stops vibrating every once in a while, and you're like, that's not a good sign. So you are approaching the city very, very quickly. You see a sandboat parked like, I don't know, half a kilometer off to your left. You realize the wind is pushing you kind of off course. You're going so fast. There's goats everywhere, dodging the goats. Right. There's goats just running, out into the desert right now. Yeah, there's a bunch of goats. Goat, goat, goat.

A bunch of goats making a freedom dash. They're like, finally. We're dashing around the herd. We got to, yeah. I suppose that you said that you retain control. So it's not going to uncontrollably slam you into the side. But I feel like we need to defy danger dexterity to not hit these goats. Yeah, totally. So somebody give me a defy danger dexterity. I'm assuming because you're piloting. Yeah, the boat skills. Come on, save a goat. 11. Oh, geez. Yeah, you step between the goat drops.

You know, you like you're threading the needle so beautifully. Jumping goats. Yeah, a goat like clops up onto the boat and runs down the other side. Well, he's like, heads up. He's talking to the goat. Yeah. And you hear the goat go, freedom. Runs into the desert. And you ask the wind to let up just before you get to the city. The night zephyr carries off into the sky. Cool. And your boat gently comes to a rest. At the edge of the city of McCall. And we tap a pen of chickens.

And all those chickens. Chicken latch opens. The chicken latch opens and the chickens don't move. Like I'm not going anywhere. I love it here. Somebody brings me corn every day. And yeah, you're here. You're at the city of McCall. You see Balco's sandboat. Big Mama parked a little bit further up the outskirts. And Billy must be nearby. And we'll cut to Billy. So Billy, you know, he's trying. To be, I guess, like economical with the exercise. He's going to have to perform.

So he's like the fastest way up is just straight up. So he pulls out his throwing daggers, two of them. And he's scaling the light tower. Oh, you've made it back to. Yeah, you've made it back to the to the sticks. I think that I kind of want Billy to have to roll to get there unseen. You know what I mean? Because like there are a lot of people in this neighborhood. Oh, shit. So defy danger dexterity. Whoa. Nice. Dexterity. I got 10. Okay. Holy shit. Yeah. You are a phantom. I am in thief mode.

Yeah. This is old school. Billy sneaking unseen through the trappings of society. I flip through the shadows and I stick close to the walls. I tiptoe. You sneak right past like jackals just chatting about their day's crimes. They committed. You hear whispers of some sort of terrible fight in Stepside that left a gang. I'm decimated. And you just hear a couple whispering sweet nothings into each other's ears in a dark alleyway. Can we hear some of those sweet nothings?

I just love the way your butt looks so sweet. It's just, you know, like most people like when they when they think about a butt, they think about like sitting and shitting. Not me. I think about your butt and I think, wow, I love it. This kid is 13. Yeah. These are like teenagers. This is not good. And the person was like, wow, you know, I never thought about my own ass like that, but I'm going to from now on. And then you hear they start kissing each other. Oh, fucking gross.

But you can make it to the base of the lighthouse. No problem. Little bit of, you know, flashbacks as you remember what you went through just earlier this day in this neighborhood. Yeah. It was like those stairs, even though I only climbed like 50 feet of them. Oh, but I love Farrah. She's such a good grandma. Do I have to? Yeah, you're going to have to roll unless you can think of another mechanical move you could use to get up there. Yeah.

It's going to be defy danger dexterity and it's going to take a while because remember it took you like a couple hours to walk up and now you're going to climb up the outside. Yeah, that's true. That's okay. Yeah. So it's nine. Okay. The first thing you do is like you scramble up, you know, a bunch of things. You go through the houses and stuff like that and get as high as you can just by climbing on those. So that gets you like 100, 120 feet up. You see Petunia. Yeah.

You see Petunia the rat sitting on a rooftop. Yeah. I did take a pause to like look in the like it's creepy, but like look in the window and like there's Greg. He's like having a nice snooze and Petunia is on the chair curled up. Yeah. Petunia. And you see the roof that you guys helped build. It's holding up. Good. Like for the last six hours. Solid six hours. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Record. And you get up on top of Greg 3G's hut with a nine. You're like, who?

I got some work ahead of me. And you start digging your little daggers into the brickwork and pulling yourself up. Yeah. And I find like little footings. And you start climbing up and we will cut to Tuck and Ving. You enter on the cliff side side of the city. Yeah. We need to be very discreet. This is a conversation that we're having in the chicken coop to be discreet. So we ducked into the chicken coop and Tuck is like, we need to be very discreet. There are people are looking for us now. Who?

What the fuck are you talking about? The Magi? Oh, no. I was Paul asking. Yeah. Okay. Yeah. Wait, what? I was really just picturing our feet inside of a nest. We're sitting on either side of this big nest. The chickens in between us. And the chickens are just like. Mwah. Mwah. Mwah. Mwah. Mwah. Mwah. Mwah. Mwah. Mwah. Mwah. Mwah. Mwah. Mwah. Mwah. Mwah. Mwah. Mwah. Mwah. Mwah. Mwah. Mwah. Mwah. What are the chickens saying? What's up? You want to be discreet. What? What? What? What's up?

Hey, ladies. Don't mind us for a moment. Okay. Okay. Mwah. Can you give us a moment, please? Mwah. Mwah. Mwah. Mwah. Mwah. And they all kind of go and cluster up on the other side of the fence. And Tuck is. Talk about us. Tuck snaps in front of Ving. And he's like, hey, it's rude. It's rude when you do that when you speak a language I don't know. So sorry. He's just casually talking to these chickens. Okay. Yeah. Well, do you think Billy's going to exercise the same discretion? No, for sure not.

Damn it. You know Billy. Yeah. One time he made a scene at a Charles Eve pageant because he thought the plastic hanging meats were real. And then at another Charles Eve pageant, he tried to fight a guy because he thought he was actually Charles and he was actually trying to break into a house. He was just doing his best. What do we have for costumes? What do we have for darkness? Oh, man. I have the axe with me. So I'm very noticeable right now. I mean, you can always hide the axe.

I'm not leaving this thing behind. Not again. Well, that's your fault. There's like a farmer's tool shed next to you. Could have some stuff in there. Maybe Randy had some stuff in his sand boat cream of the crop. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. There's a ton of work. There's a ton of work. There's a ton of work. There's a ton of work. There's a ton of work. There's a ton of work. There's a ton of work.

There's a ton of work. There's a ton of work. There's a ton of work. There's a ton of work. There's a ton of work. There's a ton of work. There's a ton of work. There's a ton of work. There's a ton of work. There's a ton of work. There's a ton of work. There's a ton of work. There's a ton of work. There's a ton of work. There's a ton of work. There's a ton of work. You're going to have to roll something to break the lock. Yeah, I'm just going to roll strike.

Okay, two to six plus strike six plus three is nine. Yeah, and I just lift the shed up the things that are in it. And as you toss the shed to the side, it shatters completely. You're not going to be able to put it back. Sorry. So now there's just a bunch of Texas. Sorry to the chickens. Sorry. They all go and they're flapping day. Actually, yeah, the chickens are making a ton of noise in your what's going on out there. Cluck, clack, casually get away from my chicken.

And you hear like a ding and you see a worm light start glowing in the house next to you. And you hear a rumbling as somebody starts coming out. You got to move fast. Are there clothes? Yeah, there's just a bunch of stuff. There's a scarecrow. Vink grabs his clothes off the scarecrow. All right. But he forgot to take the stick out. So his arms are at the side. Tuck grabs. No time to think. Oh, okay. It comes to your head. Tuck grabs a bag of bird seed. All right. That's what you get.

And puts the axe inside of it. I guess. I guess so. And the door to the house bangs open and there's a farmer standing there with a pitchfork. Get away from my chickens. Tuck grabs a pitchfork too. And he's like, they're my chickens. Are you trying to scare this guy away? Yeah. He's like, what's your name? Money. What's your name? My name's Bill. Get away from my chickens. And then Tuck goes, my name's Bill. Get away from my chickens. This is so confusing for Bill in the middle of the night.

Please roll something. 2D6 plus charisma, I guess. Vink is staying as still as possible, but this is insane to witness. Ten. He just stares at you for a second. Your name's Bill? Yeah. Where, what was your mom's name? My mom's name was Mill. My mom's name was Mill. Bill. And he holds his hand up like he's trying to see if you're a reflection. And then Tuck does the same thing. And he moves it in a circle. And Tuck. Tuck does the same thing, but there's an obvious leg. And he touches his face.

Tuck touches his face. And he just closes his door. And goes back inside. And then Tuck mime closes the door. There's no shed door. Yeah, Tuck picks the shed door up off the ground and then closes it. And you can hear, you can't see, but you can distinctly hear Bill heavily. Sitting down at his kitchen table, head in his hands. Just thinking so hard about what he saw, but you're good for now. There might be some ramifications here. I feel like every time I interact with a farmer, I…

Ruin their life? Yeah, ruin their life. Yeah. All right. So you have, Ving has a disguise. He looks like a scarecrow. What does a McCollin scarecrow look like? You know, there's a hay coming out the sleeves. Uh-huh. Dressed like librarians. Librarians. Okay. Old discarded librarian robes. That's pretty much it. Yeah. So you just got an outfit full of hay. Yeah. And a floppy hat of some kind. Yeah. Beautiful. Tuck, you just have a bag of bird seed with an ax in it. Yeah.

And he throws another bag of bird seed on his back. And he puts like an old disheveled hat on to try and like hide his face. Okay. And he hunches down so he doesn't, so he looks like a hunched farmer. Great. He makes the bird seed. His bulk of his body looks like… He just bags a bird seed. Yeah. Nice. Wonderful. And he keeps the pitchfork. All right. And you head off into the city. Yeah. Shambling. Cut back to Billy. Billy, you've begun scaling the side of the lighthouse.

I feel like, well, I know I'm ahead of them by quite a bit. Yeah. So I'd say you're like a third of the way up. That's it? It's going to take you a long time. He was able to climb a third of the way basically on the houses. True. So your stairs were spiraling. So that takes up more than going straight up. All right. All right. You're two thirds of the way up. Yeah. The lighthouse. I'm much more than two thirds of the way up. No. You're two thirds of the way up.

Billy is telling himself, I am much more than two thirds of the way up. Billy can manipulate physical space. Come on. You got a seven to nine. I would like to point out. Well, he is dripping sweat, but he's just gritting through and telling himself little stories so he doesn't get too scared. And Billy, you're like just before what looks like it used to be a window before it was sealed up. So it like sticks out a little bit.

You could rest on it and you hear a behind you and you see a chunky little bug flying right behind you. And then you see a couple more. And now there's this little swarm of chunky little bugs buzzing around you. What are they? They look like something that you might want to Spout Lore for. Okay. I will Spout Lore. But they definitely look like a bee of some kind. Ooh. Ooh. Nice. Holy shit. Cool. So nine. Great. Okay. Can we aid? No. Absolutely not.

You don't know much about them, Billy, but you do recognize these as what you've heard an entomologist in the library describe as McCollin stonecutter bees. They're very like they have gray chunky chitinous shells. They look geometric almost like they look like cut stone and they have big, huge chomping mandibles and they're flying very close to you. They're very curious as to what you are. Um, is this your house? Am I in the way? Billy kind of like moves aside a bit.

It moves a little bit closer and you can see its mandibles start like chomping. You get the idea that you might be close to their hive. Do you want to Billy's like motioning? Like do you want to chop through the window that could help me? And he's like pointing himself and Billy like there's, I don't know, just like some sand and gravel. Kind of like on the ledge. So he like picks it up and he's like holds it out like a little offering. Like yeah. All right. Can we be friends now?

Two D six plus charisma. Okay. Oh, wow. Got 13. Holy shit. Okay. Um, yeah, there's like a good number of these bees now. There's maybe like a couple dozen in this swarm and a few of them move forward and land in your hand and start. You can see their huge mandibles, which are like, you know, a third again, as big as their body. They come into the sand and rock. So I like move them against like, I guess the plastered over window. Like do you want to eat that?

And they land on the window sill next to you and start chomping at the sand. And then they start crawling all over the side of the lighthouse and you can hear like as they start chewing through the stone. Yeah. Chew it. You can do it. Like, I don't know. Billy. Like.

The copper pin of his hair and he starts like digging through it like I will help yeah chew it you can do it and um they chew like since there's a good number of them and they chew a lot faster than you would expect so they start digging through the stone pretty fast the copper pin wasn't doing anything so I like used my knives instead I'm like chew it and I start acting like I'm a little stone cutter bee by like making little mandibles with your knives yeah like yeah stone cutter billy chomp chomp chomp saying buzz a lot yeah that's amazing and as you uh follow them into this like roughly billy sized hole that they're making it takes a little bit of going you can tell that there's something that you didn't remember about stone cutter bees because all the bees are moving around you in this hole and they're filling in behind you like they're filling in the stone behind you with like very um intricate looking hive structure okay so I grab my bag from the sill yeah I don't want to leave anything behind yep and they slowly seal you in as you start to like move through the wall of this lighthouse oh and we'll cut back to tuck and being real quick what are you doing we're we're how far are we away from the lighthouse are we um maybe a 20 30 minute walk um but you're gonna have to roll something to get through the neighborhood unseen wait we don't really know where billy is going what do you think tuck and think billy is doing going to get the book yeah and where do you think the book is he we know he left it at the top of the light yes yeah at least your first instinct would be well we should go there first yeah totally thanks for talking me through that stranger you know what happy to help my name I you know I just like to go around and help people talk through things in the middle of the night it's like a spiritual undertaking I've accepted what's your name uh it's in fornish booth if you uh if you have anybody else that needs some help you just point them towards info booth and I'll help them out have a great night folks and he trundles off down the street that guy's gonna be really handy later on too I can't wait to ask him a bunch of specific questions about where our enemies are and stuff if you can find me and he starts sprinting down the street away from you a huge star above him it's bobbling he's got a map on his back yeah it says you are here and the dot always moves to where you are in the city man that guy's vibe is very much that he's on halfling white he's definitely a burner and you make it to the base of the lighthouse of course that's where billy would go and you see the uh well I'm glad it seems obvious to you sean maybe it's just because I'm omniscient I know where everybody is in the city um but yeah you get to like the uh the borderline fungal construction of the sticks and you see the lighthouse immense above you and a lot of little knife marks if you were to get really close you'd be able to see the lighthouse and you'd be able to see the lighthouse and you'd be able to see the uh if you were to go to do you think you'd go to greg's starting point shack I don't know we're in a bit of a hurry yeah can I use the axe to kind of just like smash through the side of the lighthouse just on the street full view everybody maybe is greg's up against the lighthouse isn't he it is yeah yeah maybe we'll do it at greg's house so that there is some cover so you're gonna go to this old man's house yeah and you're gonna wake him up it's like two or three in the morning and you're gonna say hey would you mind if I cut a hole into an ancient and unknowable giant construction yeah but we're gonna pitch it to him like he's on uh that house flipping show yes all right we're gonna expand this house so you go to greg's place and you knock on the door greg he wakes up his he comes to the door his eyes are closed hello greg it's tuck from earlier when your house got destroyed we're here to do it again martha you're back he's sleeping sleepwalking I'm so glad that we were able to go to the seaside for our anniversary come here and he starts moving towards you with his hands out in a kissy face yeah tuck plays into it what yeah and don't wake him up he gives you a little kiss right in the middle of your chest because you're so much taller than him uh but tuck holds his hand up and he makes it into a face and gives it lips he kisses your hand and he goes it it's great to see you too greg and as this is playing out in ving you hear why hello there hey toontown how you doing girl two times in one day could I be so lucky I'm the lucky one and you know it girl what can I help you with tonight sugar you know our sweet little boy yeah he's up on the lighthouse oh I know oh what you saw him I saw him earlier this morning not aren't you perceptive and beautiful well he he looked me right in my eyes and said hello oh man those beautiful beady little red eyes oh ving you china you and if you look over to the corner of the room tuck you hear as a rat is going you know like a wave a wave a southern bell hand gesture and if you cut back to tuck for a second he doesn't notice that because his arm is now his arm is now spooning with Greg in the bed.

Hurry the fuck up. They're whispering sweet nothings to each other. And his hand is going, your butt is great. Usually when I think of a butt, I think of pooping. But your butt is so the opposite of that. And I love it. Greg. And he's dead asleep. He's got a big smile on his face. He's so happy. Tuck continues. Okay. And Petunia is like, are you going to go get your boy? Well, yeah. You have the run of the house into all the nooks and crannies.

What part of the house butts up against the lighthouse? We're thinking about maybe cutting a little hole in there to get up the lighthouse faster. Well, if you look around, you'll see that it's more of a one room shack kind of situation. And one of the walls is very clearly the brickwork of the lighthouse. Oh, okay. Thank you very much, Petunia. Of course. You're not going to leave that hole. You're not going to be able to yawn and open to scare old Toontown, will you?

No, we'll close it up, of course. Okay. Wouldn't want to scare you. Hmm. Well, have fun. Thank you. Tuck, are you done? You're about done? Yeah, I'm done. I cannot wait until we awake on the seaside together. Good night, Greg. All right, I'm ready. You slip the arm out of Greg's hands. I like the idea, like Indiana Jones style, you switch it with a bag of bird seeds. Oh, yeah. Yeah. Oh, yeah. And draw like lipstick and eyelashes on the bag. All right.

Defy danger dexterity because that's really funny. Holy shit. As always, whenever it's going to be the funniest to succeed, you always succeed. Yeah, you slip the bag of bird seed in there and he throws his knee up over it and he holds it close. Okay, cool. I'll start cutting into this. Whoa. Quietly. Yeah. It's just going to take you longer if you do it quietly. It's not going to be hard because your axe does destroy stone. Yeah.

So Tuck takes his axe and he kind of like, he starts shaving pieces off the wall. Nice. Yeah. Cool. And the axe cuts it like butter basically. It's coming off in sheets which is really weird to see stone do. Yeah. Curls. Yeah. And we cut back to Billy. Billy, you're working through the darkness of this stone cutter beehive. Yeah. I've created a little will-o'-the-wisp. Nice. So it's like, I've got a little ball hovering in front of me. Mm-hmm. Do I discern realities to like know where I am?

No, you're going to pop out eventually. Okay. I'd say that you, being a little chaotic kid, you don't know how much time has passed because you don't really care about the passage of time very much. But eventually, as you're digging through with all your new stone cutter friends, you feel fresh air. Well, quote unquote, fresh air. Uh-huh. And you pop out. You feel the cavernous opening of the lighthouse in front of you and you are above the staircase.

Like maybe, five to eight feet like above it. So it's going to be a little bit of a drop, but you're right above the staircase. Uh, all right. And do you just climb down? Yeah. Yeah. For some reason, I just pictured like a cartoon of Billy falling forward covered in honey and just like, squeak. Yeah, I basically like belly flop. Hope for the best. Oh, that's probably what stone cutter bee honey is like. It's like mortar. Oh, so cool. Cool.

And then like, as it dries, you have to like, brush it off. Yeah. It's like sandy. But your skin's so smooth. Yeah. Because it takes all the old skin with it. It's probably so good for exfoliating. Oh my God, they have it in spas. Um, so yeah, you climb down, no problem, um, with your little daggers, tink, tink, tink.

And, um, the stone cutter bees start filling in that section and like, they were basically just filling like tubes on tubes on tubes behind you and then you see the beautiful construction of their rock hard hive structure like, starts spreading out along the walls too and then they just stop and you hear like, quiet little inside the tunnels. I see by them. Whoa. And, uh, yeah, you're in the lighthouse itself. It's very eerie in here.

You've got the light from your little will-o'-the-wisp and you remember that on your way up the first time, you didn't really have much to do with it. You didn't take in too much of the lighthouse. So now you've got a bit of a climb ahead of you but now it's safer but also, who knows what's in here. Alright, so I tuck my daggers back into my pockets and hoof on my backpack and I'm pretty scared so I turn the will-o'-the-wisp into a little wicker.

I'm like, okay, now I feel like I'm not quite so alone. Yeah, totally. So up we go. Okay. I'm going to be as stealthy as possible. Yeah, climbing up these stairs is a laborious process for Billy but, um, as you start hustling up this staircase you are struck, by, the mystery in openings that are off the staircase like other chambers that obviously go to different parts of this lighthouse. Yeah.

And, the designs carved into the walls that you didn't really notice before, like there's just a very alien, monumental, ancient feeling to this lighthouse that is somewhat, it's strange but it's somewhat comforting to Billy in its age. Yeah, that's true. Yeah. I feel like I relate to it. Does Billy have any interest in, um, exploring the lighthouse at all or are you just going straight to the top? I'm pretty fixated on this book. Yeah, totally. Yeah.

Uh, okay, so you climb up the lighthouse hand over hand, foot over foot, belly over belly as you flop up the staircase with your wick or the wisp behind you. As you get to the top of the lighthouse you see that opening you feel a disturbance in the air very similar to the disturbance that you felt when you were fighting Roth and the Medjay earlier. There's some sort of interference, right? Yeah, so I extinguished the willow, the wisp. Um, this might take a roll to get close.

I'm going to trap expert. Oof. That's a nine plus two is 11. Fuck. So you get three questions off trap expert. Okay. Is there a trap here? Yes, there is. Okay. And if so, what activates it? Um, what active, what would activate it is probably just getting too close. You feel just based on your experience now being around Medjay, you could tell if you really, really focused kind of where Roth is. He's at the top of the lighthouse on the skirt that surrounds the very top like the light chamber.

Okay. But he's not moving right now. Is Billy sensing this through the fate realm? Yeah, kind of like it's it's something that not everybody would be aware of. Tuck actually with Roth Tuck might be aware of this feeling if he was really close. But it's just like a turbulence. Oh, because I'm connected to the X. No, just because of the degree to which they're creating a turbulence like in reality. So it just affects regular people too. Yes. Yeah. But mastering of the elements.

I think especially when like when Billy was in like Lillian's tower, I think it's kind of similar to that feeling. Yeah, exactly. It feels very similar to the energy you felt in Lillian's tomb. Hmm. So what does the trap do when activated? What the trap would do is if you get too close, um, Roth will probably be able to sense that you're there and then he will attack. What else is hidden here?

So now that you've gotten to sort of the top of the stairs and you're peeking out onto the, uh, the platform, you can see Roth sitting at the very edge overlooking the city facing the salt flats. He's sitting cross-legged on the ground. He has his hands on his knees and he's completely immobile. But you can see next to him is the book. I'm going to try something. Mm-hmm. So I'm going to use a fairy child to switch objects within view. Ah, yeah. Yeah. Sweet.

And I don't have to roll for that, right? Like, I just use one of my moves. It'll be my last move. Oh, it'll be your last fairy child? Yeah. Then, yeah, you would just spend it. All right. I'm all out. So I, um, what do I have that I'm not too worried about leaving behind? Oh, I have some, like, fucking gross sweaty raisins still. The last of my raisins. The last of my raisins. Is there anything that's maybe a little more important to Billy that would be, like, a sacrifice to leave behind?

Is there anything that's more nutritionally dense that you can maybe leave? Uh, uh, I'll leave my copper pin. Oh. Oh, shit. That's actually, yeah, pretty big. That's pretty cool. Mm-hmm. Okay, so I take it out of my hair. I'm like, fuck. Shit. Billy says, losing a pin that he really likes. The audience realizing that the menders will no longer be able to use it to track Billy. Yeah. So Billy is super sad about this, but, yeah.

And, yeah, you hold your hand out with the copper pin in it and you feel that fairy energy start to tingle through you. Mm-hmm. And, boop, then the book's in your hand and the copper pin is set. I look at this book, I'm like, I hate you. I put it in my backpack. And, as you're, as you're getting ready to turn and head back down the stairs, you feel that spiritual turbulence pitch. I stay really still. And Roth starts to turn. I duck out. We cut back to Ving and Tuck. Oh, God.

Tuck, you've made it through the side of the lighthouse. Lathing it away, there's a weirdly goopy pile of stone behind you. Mm-hmm. And you feel, yeah, the stale air of the lighthouse rush as you cut through into the structure itself. Ving can sense that the Roth is up there, right? Totally. Maybe not quite from this distance, but still, you enter the lighthouse and it's, the vibes are bad in here. Yeah. You know? Like, it's not specifically Roth is upstairs and he's angry.

It's, something is wrong. Should we run up the stairs? Yeah, the stairs are here. Is there any faster way? Yeah, you can light as a feather. Tuck, I'm gonna, I'm gonna go up. Yeah, you go ahead. I'll, I'll fucking try and bust it, okay? I'll try and do the stairs as fast as I can. I'm so sorry. No, it's fine. I'm in a bulk phase. This is gonna be extra hard for Tuck because my thighs have been rubbing together so much because I'm in that kind of a bulk phase.

It's gonna be really chafed when you get to the top. I'm bulking my thighs. Well, it's good for stairs. All right, light as a feather. Light as a feather. So, it's been a while. I want to read that one real quick. When you run across a surface that cannot hold your weight, roll plus desk, dex. On 10 plus, you do it, no problem. Seven to nine, something goes wrong. Okay.

So, it looks like he's, yeah, just kind of like jaunting above the stairs around them and jumping from side to side little ledges. So, that is a seven. Okay. So, you start scaling the wall like just your fingers finding the tiniest little in-between things sections of brick climbing up. Yeah, maybe that was an old stonecutter bee hive, you know, like you're just scaling like a spider up the side of this wall.

And as you get to the next level of the stairs and start scaling that wall, you see, hear, and feel a huge bright gout of flame punch out over the stairs at the very top that Billy, you just dodged. Roth has seen you and he turned around and immediately just punched forward and fired a huge big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, Oh my God. Whoa. Holy shit. And yeah, Billy, I assume. Are you trying to run down back down the stairs?

Yeah, I'm actually sliding down the rail. Okay. 2d6 plus dexterity. Nice. Oh, 13. Holy shit. Okay. Billy Bart Simpsons down the rail of the staircase and Bing, you see this flame and you hear, I assume Billy makes a noise. Yeah.

I'm like, well, I scream and then a big thunk as I jump down and then I'm like, oh oh whoa slide down yeah and uh ving you're climbing up tuck you see this flame too as you start hustling up the stairs and you get the distinct idea that that is definitely billy oh no and tuck yells up billy get out of here I'm coming and ving you're climbing the wall and billy as you're sliding down the rail you see ving climbing up one side of the wall and you're about to like meet basically at the same section of the staircase but ving looking over your shoulder as you're climbing you see roth like running down the staircase keep going billy yeah follow me I kind of want to act as like a bit of a barrier like I'll start coming down but I need to put some buddy between billy and roth okay yeah totally billy whizzes past you on the railing and you see roth arcing around the spiral of the stairs approaching you what do you do I'm gonna fight with honor and gonna get gain some chi hopefully ten okay so that is a bunch of chi and he's yeah he's coming down the stairs at you and he yells some stupid villain bullshit what does he yell uh he sees you and says uh now will be the end of this I'm drawing an absolute so is roth he's not good at this so angry he's had such a shitty fucking day for a morally gray villain he's like you will stand in the way of my ambitions no longer what lame and he's doing that you know he's running forward and he's punching and like little chunks of the elements are coming out like fire rock a puff of air kind of stuff um I want to lay I have still have a jar of that worm cum the blue light maybe it's it's glowing what's I would like to hear your plan with the worm cum please uh he's running down the stairs uh-huh I'm gonna take I'm gonna take it and put it on a whole bunch of the stairs I'll uh home alone and uh covered up with a quick light dusting of um of dust of dirt sand so that he is not glowing and hopes just to trip him up a little bit to lay a little trap for him okay uh defy danger dexterity I guess to do it fast yeah watch this he's laid so many worm cum traps in his life as a kid he used to do it all the time in the forest nice eleven oh my god so you just like pull out the jar throw it on the ground kick some dirt this gooey pile yeah you kick some dirt or like elementally move some dust onto the pile oh cool yeah and uh he's running down at you this is definitely here he hasn't seen it he might slip I'm going I'm going down oh you're just running okay I hop on the rail like billy yeah go for it divide danger dexterity light as a feather surfing down ten okay great so you uh throw this goo on the ground cover it in dust hop on the railing start surfing down and tuck wants to uh do what are you waiting for to try and distract roth so that he doesn't pay as much attention to billy and ving and like looks down is like what's that happening down there over there who's that big boy with a with a big bag of bird seeds yeah you brought the bird seed with you well I had two bags so I still had one okay is that is he carrying greg's wife so the answer is yes you did bring a bag of bird seed I did I ran back into greg's house and I grabbed the wife bag and I ran back out and my what are you waiting for is that I'm gonna throw this uh like sex doll at it's not roth to try and hit him to make him mad nothing establishes that this is a sex doll it just was all right uh yeah what are you waiting for so what's what's how do you roll that again when you cry out a challenge to your enemies roll plus con on a ten plus they treat you as the most obvious threat to be dealt with and ignore your companions so twelve okay so roth is running down the stairs and what do you do you yell something yeah I go hey roth I found your girlfriend and I throw the bag of bird seed up at him and despite the fact that you're like still pretty far below him tuck is so strong that it just hits the side of it hits the wall next to roth like a fucking boulder and it explodes in his face and he looks down at you and he goes I will kill all of you and he steps forward and steps in the worm slips his feet out from under him slams his ass on the stairs and talk yeah you keep hustling up the staircase and just as you get some momentum going billion ving rip past you on the banister going the other way I took I wants to slide down the banister too because he feels left out now okay it's banister time but he's doing it you know the lame way where you're going but first yeah oh like a lady yeah if I danger dexterity seven okay um so you see billy and ving race past you billy's uh riding on his butt ving is surfing it like disney's tarzan as we've established and you are like I'm doing it too and you throw your leg over the banister hold on with your hands in front of you and start squeak squeak yeah because he doesn't have pants so it's just squeaking against his the inside of his thighs which are already rubbed pretty raw yeah and you see above you the worm goo glow shifting as roth gets to his feet and starts charging down the staircase is the banister faster than me running down you probably not okay I get off the bed and I start running and yeah as you're running down the staircase billy and ving you hear the like thud thud thud as tuck is charging guys we're not on the banister anymore we're running down the stairs this is the game that we're all playing not the banister game stairs run so you run down to the bottom you're running down to the bottom of the lighthouse you pass right by the hole in the lighthouse that leads to greg's house and roth is sailing down the stairs behind you and a few days later a woman runs up to a woman runs up to a woman runs up to a woman runs up to a woman runs up to a woman runs up to a woman runs up to a woman runs up to a woman runs up to a woman runs Yeah, kind of.

He's basically coming down on a cushion of air, and you get to the huge central base of the lighthouse, and you all get to the bottom of the staircase and prepare for Roth's arrival. And up and in front of you, like on the spiral of the staircase that comes down to the base, he sees you at the very base of the lighthouse and kicks off the wall directly across from you and sails through the air and lands with a huge crash right in front of you as the brickwork waves out from him.

And he stands up to his full, not that impressive height, two-thirds of this group are much taller than Roth. And he looks you tuck in the eyes, and he says, this ends now. And his voice reverberates through the lighthouse. That was a better one, honestly, than the last two you tried. Pretty cool. Yeah, that one was good. And that's where we're going to end. Ended for this week. Tucked shit talking a villain.

I've been your Game Master, Sean O'Hara, joining me playing Ving, the half-elf druid, Paul Oppers. Take care, everyone. Playing Tacoma Dome, the barbarian, Abdul Aziz. So long. And playing Fat Billy, the halfling thief, Jessica Tai. Bye. Thank you to Erin Reid for our intro and outro music, as always. Thank you to our Patreon supporters around the world. If you would like to support the show, join us at patreon.com slash spoutlord or spoutlord.com slash money, please.

We have been doing some more streaming lately. We got a monthly. We got a Q&A. And we're very soon going to start, or maybe we've already started by the time this comes out. Every alternating month, we're doing live improvised episodes of Lone Tree Hill using Bully Pulpit Games' fiasco. First one was a lot of fun. Second one, fingers crossed, has been a lot of fun. And you can get access to that and more on patreon.com slash spoutlord. Maybe drop us a review on iTunes if you want to.

We'd really love it and appreciate it. Have a great night. Bye. Bye. Keep saying have a great night. Have a great whatever. See ya. And so ends the tale of Adventures 3 Who tried the best they can Though dumb and scared and lost they be For time's abreast in revelry And though our journey may be like a conclusion We will not leave you alone We will not leave you without a resolution Return next week to hear some more Whilst you commute or do your chores And for you I'd gladly spout more